Applebees hours

My daughter met (supposedly) another girl her age on an online forum game over a year ago, says she is her best friend and lives about 1.5 hours from us, and now wants to meet her in person. I don't want to deny my daughter the chance to meet her friend if she really is legit—but my "don't meet strangers off the internet" alarm bells that were drilled into me are going off.
Apparently the girl's parents want to have a video call with all of us (them, their daughter, me and my wife, and our daughter) first, and then meet for lunch at an Applebee's halfway between us. I know it would be easiest (for me) to just say no, but she has been HOUNDING me to be able to meet her friend, and says she and the girl have exchanged pictures of them doing specific things (like having a tissue box on their head) and that she knows the difference between a girl her age and a weirdo pretending. I don't see the angle of how a scammer would benefit from chatting and roleplaying horses for a whole year just to meet a kid in public with her parents, so I wanted to see if this was a known scam. Is there a way to do this safely?

This brief, poorly expressed post is an open love letter delivered at any/all waitstaff in the USA.
It is an expression my thankfulness to every single one y'all.
It's easy to forget how horrible service is, anywhere other than the US.
If you are an American server, I hope you realize how incredibly skilled, intelligent, gritty and efficient you truly are. Please, take a second give yourself a pat on the back and some self love.
I'm just finishing up trip around the world. It's been about a year, and I've cooked for myself maaaybe 3, 4 times.
I've learned the hard way, once you leave the USA, you need to pray to the kitchen gods, because you have no idea what's about to happen. Anything could happen.
These non-USA servers are terrible.
They are lowkey scared of their customers.
They don't understand the concept of multitasking.
They don't check on you, because they have no idea what is going on.
I'm in Argentina right now, and hooooboy, getting a sandwich is a painful, 3 hour ordeal.
If you haven't experienced the inefficiencies, the poor planning, and fundamental lack of brainpower you'll witness in, say, Spain or Portugal, you might be shocked at what it's like out there.
idgaf you work at an Applebee, some bougie Ramsey restaurant in Vegas, or just a good ole divey diner in the Midwest -- if you are an American servier -- you are a national treasure.
I love you, I support you, I can't wait to tip the hell out of you when I get back, because you deserve every penny and more. If you ever get sick of waiting tables, realize, you have learned how to problem solve, communicate, interact, listen, and think ahead and generally get your head out of your ass and make thing happen. You have all the skills you need to become a fucking CEO anywhere. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise or tell you that you have a shitty job. You are the cream of the crop.

Hi! I (21f) have been drinking for a few years about once every 2-3 months, since about age 17 I'd say, with no issues. About a month ago, I got a drink at Applebee's. Afterwards, the inside of my cheeks in the lower jaw region started to tingle, then hurt. Like how a foot hurts when it falls asleep, but worse. Drinking water helps, and letting the water sit in my cheeks alleviates the pain for like 20-30 seconds. It lasts about half an hour total. Now it happens when alcohol even touches the inside of my mouth.
What the hell is this 😭

comments explain gin appreciated :)
• How old are you? What's your gender? Give us a general description of yourself.
I’d describe myself as sensitive, creative, silly, optimistic, weird, easygoing, lazy, emotional, non-judgemental, artistic, passionate, introverted, sincere, empathetic, imaginative, thoughtful, funny, quiet, etc. So many words flying around in my head to describe myself
For fun, I love music with my whole life – playing piano and other instruments, singing, and I like dancing to music (but not choreography boo, just like on my patio for funsies). I also like art, especially painting, but I’m not very good at it lol. I love different kinds of exercise like running, swimming, hiking, yoga, figure skating to music, walking, kayaking, cross country skiing, pilates, trampolining/gymnastics. I feel really connected to the animals around me and love talking to the birds and squirrels and stuff around me. I also love diving into a book and getting lost in the fantasy of fiction. And I just got into photography because my grandpa just passed away and he photographed nature; that is a skill I wish I learned from my elder before he passed. Above all else I love hanging out with my husband and kids.
I know I’m an enneagram 9. I’ve always thought I was an INFP but my step-sisters think I’m an ISFP because I am very active and enjoy being active so they think I use Se??? One of my friends thinks I’m an ISFJ. So now it’s an identity crisis! Lmk lol
• Is there a medical diagnosis that may impact your mental stability somehow?
Anxiety :o
• Describe your upbringing. Did it have any kind of religious or structured influence? How did you respond to it?
My parents were 19ish when my sisters and I were born – we’re triplets, so my poor mom with accidental triplet pregnancy lol. When we were born, my dad didn’t really have anything to do with us so my mom raised us for the first few years of our lives; she’s perfect in every way. I had some trauma in kindergarten where I was separated from my mom and sisters/everyone I know – not going to say any more than that, but it caused a lot of anxiety. After I found my family again, my sisters were going to my dad’s on weekends. He was getting older so stepping up to being a dad and I love him but it was hard for me to be away from my mom after the trauma, so sometimes I didn’t always go. He wanted my sisters and I to all be famous/professional athletes in different sports, so mine was trampolining. It was a little too much pressure I prefer a go with the flow attitude, so once we switched to week at mom’s/week at dad’s structure, it was a lot for me to handle at dad’s house. I do feel like I had a pretty great childhood overall though.
• What do you do as a job or as a career (if you have one)? Do you like it? Why or why not?
I am a composer and musician. I love it because I am passionate about music and I get to be creative and weird and also work from home a lot of the time so I just get to be me and do what I want when I want.
• If you had to spend an entire weekend by yourself, how would you feel? Would you feel lonely or refreshed?
Love it
• What kinds of activities do you prefer? Do you like, and are you good at sports? Do you enjoy any other outdoor or indoor activities?
I like artsy and creative activities most. It’s what makes me the most happy and passionate.
I love being active but don’t like team sports or anything, other than tennis I guess I like a little. I like exercise where I’m outdoors with the animals or like running and stuff where I can put my headphones in and drift off into my head for an hour and let my feet follow my heart following the music.
I was pretty good at trampolining, but I’m not really good at sports that require like actual coordination and like having to know where people and things are. Even figure skating and dance and yoga and stuff, I don’t like learning routines or anything, just following my heart in the moment.
• How curious are you? Do you have more ideas then you can execute? What are your curiosities about? What are your ideas about - is it environmental or conceptual, and can you please elaborate?
I LOVE to learn. I will hear about a topic and it’ll spark my interest and I’ll dive right into it and learn as much as I can. There are so many things that can excite me – from the enneagram, to space, to fantasy worlds, to art history – I don’t think I can pin it down much because it’s so random and just following where my mind takes me.
• Would you enjoy taking on a leadership position? Do you think you would be good at it? What would your leadership style be?
Nope and nope and leadership style would be absolute chaos because I’d just chillax in a closed door in an office listening to music with headphones and while everyone around me is a lion attacking one another because they have no boss helping them solve problems
• Are you coordinated? Why do you feel as if you are or are not? Do you enjoy working with your hands in some form? Describe your activity?
I am not coordinated lol, but I enjoy playing instruments if that counts as working with my hands. I’m certainly not building any patios or whatever hands-on people are doing with their lives
• Are you artistic? If yes, describe your art? If you are not particular artistic but can appreciate art please likewise describe what forums of art you enjoy. Please explain your answer.
I am artistic. I don’t think I’m a good visual artist, though, if that what this question means. But I think my soul is that of an artistic person. Lol. I do visual art, and I’ll just paint or draw or sketch or oil pastel or whatever, but it’s just random and the style of artwork is totally dependent on my mood and I have never really put in effort to develop any skills or anything, it’s just something I do for fun. I consider music an art form though, and that is something I put a lot of effort and time into. Like my visual art, though, my music is very mood dependent and just follows the vibe of who I am that day. I will sometimes play a jazz piano, then the next day sing on my guitar an old Joni Mitchell song, then at sunset I am dancing in my kitchen with a pop playlist blasting. It is so dependent on my mood at one moment in time that it is hard to describe.
• What's your opinion about the past, present, and future? How do you deal with them?
The past is a beautiful scrapbook of histories and memories that continues to grow and can be looked at through rose-coloured glasses whenever you’re in need of it. The present is just as beautiful but sometimes it’s hard to live there when my big head can so easily lay on the couch and think about some random things that are “more interesting” (I’m getting better at not doing this now that I have kids and want to be more present, thank God). The future is exciting but who knows what it’s gonna be about – too many possibilities to write down here
• How do you act when others request your help to do something (anything)? If you would decide to help them, why would you do so?
I love helping:) I believe in the importance of building a community and promoting values of kindness and if someone asks me to help with something, I know they need it and will do so
• Do you need logical consistency in your life?
No? :p
• How important is efficiency and productivity to you?
0/10
• Do you control others, even if indirectly? How and why do you do that?
No, although sometimes others control me lol oopsies
• What are your hobbies? Why do you like them?
Music, reading, being in nature, art, exercise, photography. I’ve said them all a couple times in this I think already. I love them because they are all a part of me and I feel like I am me when I do the things I love, I don’t know lol, I don’t really have a reason
• What is your learning style? What kind of learning environments do you struggle with most? Why do you like/struggle with these learning styles? Do you prefer classes involving memorization, logic, creativity, or your physical senses?
I haven’t taken classes in a while, but I was always a “the arts” class kid. I like creativity the best. I was an alright student in the rest of the subjects I guess, but they weren’t really my vibe
• How good are you at strategizing? Do you easily break up projects into manageable tasks? Or do you have a tendency to wing projects and improvise as you go?
Winging it lol
• What are your aspirations in life, professionally and personally?
I just wanna be happy whatever I’m doing. I’m not super ambitious. I can see possibilities in my head but don’t really pin myself down to one aspiration when there are so many options
• What are your fears? What makes you uncomfortable? What do you hate? Why?
I have separation anxiety from the ones I love most – my husband, kids, mom, sisters. Outside of my like diagnosed general anxiety disorder, I don’t consider myself a fearful or hateful person so this is difficile to answer. I guess I’m kind of afraid of the dark sometimes because if I’m overtired my mind paints a picture of scary invisible things :o Idk what I hate outside of the obvious
• What do the "highs" in your life look like?
Most of my life is a high – I like to live on the bright side of life. But I am also a very emotional person in both the positive and negative ways, so can go from elation to crying in 30 seconds. I like it that way – I feel very strongly. Highs can be so many things like belly laughing with your husband about an inside joke to escaping into a brand new book. Things that are happy and light and easy and comfortable to me make me happy
• What do the "lows" in your life look like?
Most of my lows happen with anxiety. It’s when I feel lonely. I’m very introverted so love my alone time, but loneliness is different than being alone. I feel very sad and scared during my lows.
• How attached are you to reality? Do you daydream often, or do you pay attention to what's around you? If you do daydream, are you aware of your surroundings while you do so?
I love daydreaming <3 I’m not very aware of my surroundings when I do so, but I guess somewhere in my subconscious I am because I only sometimes like run into poles or walls and stuff when my mind is wandering
• Imagine you are alone in a blank, empty room. There is nothing for you to do and no one to talk to. What do you think about?
Omg. Depends on the day lol, I think I’d be the perfect candidate for this though, since my mind runs wild and I could entertain myself for months in a room like this
• How long do you take to make an important decision? And do you change your mind once you've made it?
It takes forever because I’m constantly making decisions then changing my mind lol. Decisions aren’t that serious for me so I’ll decide when I decide
• How long do you take to process your emotions? How important are emotions in your life?
Emotions are so important. I love my sensitivity and my feelings. It makes my life so much more passionate
• Do you ever catch yourself agreeing with others just to appease them and keep the conversation going? How often? Why?
Yeah literally 24/7 unless it goes against like my values it really isn’t that serious for me. Like, who cares if we go to Applebees or the Olive Garden lol? Not me!
• Do you break rules often? Do you think authority should be challenged, or that they know better? If you do break rules, why?
Ummmm, I don’t think I break rules often bc I don’t want the hassle or to hurt anyone. But also I don’t think I’m like a “rule-follower” person. I will break a rule if I really don’t agree with it or if affects me that much, but for the most part it’s like whatever might as well take the path of least resistance lol
View Poll

How do you all handle going to local places that don’t have any nutrition info, and the ingredients aren’t necessarily apparent? What I do is put the ingredients I know about in Cronometer, and kind of “build” the meal, but honestly that’s after the fact, and can sometimes be too late.
I went to a business dinner tonight and they went to this Lebanese place that was amazing. I got a fish dish so that I could have the best chance at staying in budget, but dang… I mean, you just have no clue what they put in stuff, and calories are kind of a total guess…
As mentioned in other posts my profession requires a lot of business dinners, happy hours etc. last week it was a local authentic Chinese place. I got something akin to “broccoli beef” again so I had the best chance at guessing calories.
What strategies do you use in these situations? I’m already the biggest guy at the table, and I’m usually buying dinner and drinks for the whole lot (corp pays for it) and I have some control over where we go, but these are high end executive dinners, I can’t really take them to Applebees… Most of these folks know very good, high end local places that I’ve never heard of since I usually have landed in the city a few hours before.

Posting text in full due to paywall:
“I remember all this—it’s just, like, flashbacks,” Chris Smalls said, standing in a gallery at the Whitney Museum. Smalls, a former Amazon warehouse worker, has become the unlikely face of the labor movement. He was examining a series of sculptures called “Blue Collars,” part of a survey show by the artist Josh Kline, who was planning to meet him in the gallery. To Smalls’s left was a shopping cart stuffed with Walmart boxes and disembodied arms, cast from the limb of a real Walmart employee, named Jason. Along with an Applebee’s waitress, a FedEx delivery worker, and a hotel cleaner, Jason had allowed Kline to do a 3-D scan of his body for the project.
“I worked at Walmart, I worked at FedEx,” Smalls, who is thirty-four, said. “We work, and we give up our body parts,” he added, musing on the sculpture. “Over time, these jobs will break you down.”
For the past fifteen years, Kline has made satirical, often uncomfortably prescient art about the dehumanizing nature of work and the ways in which technology makes workers disposable. He doesn’t consider himself an activist, however. “I know the difference between real activism and what I’m doing,” he said.
Kline showed up in gray jeans, a tan T-shirt, and a ball cap. It would have been easy to assume that Smalls—in patent-leather Prada high-tops, gold grills, and Versace sunglasses—was the celebrated artist. The two men were meeting for the first time and seemed nervous. Kline apologized to Smalls for being “a little out of it.” He’d been working fifteen-hour days to prepare for his show about labor, and had lost six pounds.
“Don’t worry, man,” Smalls said. “I just came from a rally. I’m the same way right now.” Smalls, whom Time magazine named one of the “100 Most Influential People of 2022,” led the first successful union drive at an Amazon warehouse. For the past two years, he has served as president of the Amazon Labor Union, where tensions about how best to bring the second-largest company in the world to the bargaining table are running high. (The day after the Whitney visit, a video was leaked of Smalls and a fellow union member coming to blows outside Smalls’s former workplace, JFK8 Amazon, in Staten Island.) “Being an organizer is a lot more work than Amazon,” he said. “But it’s a lot less strenuous on the body.” This was his first time at the Whitney. Years ago, he worked for a food-service company that catered parties at the Museum of Modern Art.
Kline and Smalls walked into a dimly lit installation called “Contagious Unemployment” (2016). Transparent orbs in the shapes of common viruses hung from the ceiling, each containing a cardboard box filled with the paperweights, picture frames, and other personal effects of a fictional white-collar worker who had been laid off.
“I was thinking a lot about my father,” Kline said, looking at the work. “He lost his job when I was a teen-ager, and people treated him like a leper, like he was contagious with something awful.” Today, the sculptures evoke the isolation of workers during the pandemic. “It was a metaphor, and then it became very real,” Kline added.
“How does it feel to know you predicted it?” Smalls asked. Amazon fired him, he said, after he helped organize a protest of the company’s covid safety protocols. (An Amazon spokesperson has said the firing was for repeatedly “violating social-distancing guidelines.”)
“Hopefully, the rest of my work doesn’t come true,” Kline said.
Strolling through Kline’s techno-dystopia, the pair swapped stories about Amazon boxes: Kline used them as flooring for installations. Smalls once stacked them to create a nearly seven-foot-tall Christmas tree outside Jeff Bezos’s Manhattan apartment, as part of a protest. They discussed which politicians excited them (none), whether it would be more effective to cancel Amazon Prime (Smalls) or to nationalize it (Kline), and their common goal of making the working class more visible.
“We don’t make it look like it’s cool to join a union,” Smalls said. “What if unions had a Super Bowl commercial?”
He gestured toward one of the art works, a video of a “commercial” for universal basic income. Inspired by a Bernie Sanders ad, it shows the things that society could accomplish—cure cancer, care for aging parents—if we weren’t scrambling to make ends meet.
Would Smalls ever consider running for office, Kline asked.
“I don’t want to do politics,” Smalls said. “But I’ll do whatever it takes to save this planet. If I’m doing it, I’m going to go for President. I’m not going to be no middleman.” ◆
Julia Halperin is a co-founder of the Burns Halperin Report and the former executive editor of Artnet News.

I’m honestly excited for ASA I’m upset by bad communication from Wildcard, and Snail Games seems shady. They definitely haven’t presented themselves well at all… but the price of the remaster isn’t unreasonable at all to me. For the price of a meal at Applebees, I can get a few thousand more hours out of a game I love. Am I worried that all proposed features won’t function as promised? Yes. Am I worried about a delay? Yes. Am I going to log in to an online server for the first time when the game comes out as soon as it’s out? Also, yes. I’m a console player, so I’ve never had access to mods, so that’s going to be amazing. Some of the quality of life improvements sound absolutely amazing. The graphics? Hope they’re great, but not worried at all about it. I have a sneaking suspicion that ASA will have a stronger player base than Ark 2. Now THAT… Ark 2? I’m not happy at all about that, mainly due to bad communication.

So I work at an Applebees and I was doing to go the other night. That's means I bring all of the dashers and uber drivers the orders. Well some guy had an order for someone named A. When I brought it out, he had 2 orders and thought it was for the other person, not even realizing who he was there for. First mistake, like come on pay attention. But anyway after I give him the food he asks me what time we close, I hesitated bc I really didn't know weekend hours but I told him 1am. He didn't even skip a beat and told me to smile, I immediately told him not to tell me what to do and he told me to smile again. I repeated myself with a thumbs up and then waved as if to say gtfo of my store. As he's leaving my coworker comes up and asks if he needs to go f with that guy but I went sorta mute (I'm autistic so that happens plus if I had an rbf, it wasn't on purpose and I was only working in the back that night.) Idk I doordash with my bf on the side and I would NEVER treat anyone like that in their place of work. No offense but you're a dasher, that's pathetic to act like that to the merchants who let you make money.

The best thing I could have done to maintain my previously positive impression of SFA would have been to not visit.
I am relatively local to SFA, close enough to refer to it as one of my home parks. My SO and I had purchased Diamond Passes for the discount friend tickets when visiting SFoG earlier this year, so we decided to kill a few hours and have some fun at the local Six Flags. I will say that prior to today I had more favorable impression of this park than some, and while we were both disappointed and a bit flummoxed over the closure of the Coyote Creek and Whistlestop Park sections of the park, we were not expecting the downturn in overall experience compared to our visits last year.
So, pulling up to the park, we see that the price for general parking has increased, to the fair sum of $35. As season pass members, this didn’t affect us, but that pricing seems excessive for the scope and quality of experience within. Now, we can honestly debate how ethical it is to charge parking for a paid experience in the first place; at the end of the day it’s just another method of monetization to subsidize ticket costs, but $35 ‘feels’ like a big ask for SFA. Okay, so get the car parked, and we realize that this place is DEAD. Almost astoundingly so considering how agreeable the weather was on the day of our visit. Have zero issue parking, getting through security, or scanning our passes for admission. Good start! We decided to tackle the park in a clockwise fashion, starting with the Mari Gras section of the park and Ragin’ Cajun.
We arrive at this section around 30 minutes after the park opens, and are informed that the entire section of the park is closed, but we are more than welcome to try the games. Declining this additional avenue for Six Flags to separate us from our discretionary dollars, we cut through this portion of the park and headed to Gotham City, looking for any signs of life from a ride.
Joker’s Jinx was open. Let’s Go.
Joker’s Jinx: 8/10. So, everybody and their cousin has ridden a Premier Rides Spaghetti Bowl at this point, so I will not bore you by retreading a well known ride experience. I will say that the single train running felt like it had been recently refurbished, as the vibration and roughness I come to expect from its twins at Kings Island and Kings Dominion was almost completely absent. Good ride, with a fun mix of forces and a launch with just a nice amount of kick at the start.
So, feeling pretty good after that, we continued onto the back of the park. Penguin’s Blizzard River (They had the rights to possessive naming with DC characters when this bad boat was built.) Alas, it was not operating; a couple of staff were walking down the lift hill. Not a huge letdown, and the other non-coaster attractions in this sector of the park were all operational. Walking up to Superman: ROS, we were informed by a helpful sign that Batwing wouldn’t be open until noon. Not surprising, but slightly disappointing. Whatever, even with one train operation, Ride of Steel had zero line, and even this Intamin hyper has some redeeming qualities.
Superman: ROS. 6/10
The best part of this ride experience was being able to ride three times without leaving the station platform; the park had so few guests queuing up that even with a single train, our row remained open. The second best part of this ride experience is the airtime during the first drop and return airtime hill between the two helices of terror (Oh, I’ll get to that.) Now, to the less praiseworthy elements of the ride. I don’t normally mind shin guards on rides (Especially if they are there instead of an OTSR) but these retrofitted ones are a world away from ergonomic. The angle at which they rest against your shin is only conducive to bruising, and honestly their placement so low makes them almost ineffective at their job of aligning your legs. Not a dealbreaker, but certainly a demerit.
The layout though. Why? (I get it’s a mirror image of the one at Darien Lake, but putting those helices over water and having the first one go left to appease all the NASCAR fans out there still doesn’t justify that waste of kinetic energy and steel.) These helices are forceless, they bleed off valuable speed that could be used to navigate track fabricated into an interesting centerline instead, and then that straight track. I cannot emphasize enough that it would have cost Intamin no more than an additional $20,000 worth of R&D and material to insert a small airtime hill here. Wasted space. Then we go through another helix of zero force and only remorse, before hitting a few good bunny hops, a trim brake of sadness, another bunny hop with one leg missing, and then the final brakes. This ride could be a masterpiece, the only thing it’s missing is a good layout.
After three laps on Superman, we exited the ride to see that the sign in front of Batwing had been swapped with the ever reassuring ‘This attraction is temporarily not operating’ sign. Realizing that this branch of the park was a bust, we continued onward, back past Joker's Jinx, to the crown jewel of our ‘Six Flags Day’ and the ride experience that has me questioning my previously positive perspective on this particular park.
Firebird. Ride, 4/10. Ride experience: 1/10.
This is a middling ride, and B&M’s first coaster under their own brand name. Don’t blame them for how forgettable it is, they were playing things safe to establish a customer base and reliable ride system. Layout has a decent loop, and a few spots of headbanging, including one quite severe slamma jamma at the exit of the corkscrew. Fire effect was operational, looks nifty from the line, and doesn't really impact the ride. That’s all fine and dandy. What is not ‘fine’ and certainly not ‘dandy’ from a customer service perspective was how this ride is operated and staffed.
Our ride experience began with a five second countdown to move past the just opened gates and enter the loading platform. Good for efficiency, but bad when you start this countdown prior to the guests on the train disembarking. In practice, this meant you had five seconds to awkwardly shuffle to the small amount of standing room between train and railing, until the seats in front of you were freed up. You must be thinking “Oh, why would you complain about a park trying to maximize throughput”
Two things.

1. This is one train ops land, so that isn’t a super high priority.
   
2. If the seat in front of me is occupied, giving me five seconds to rush through just to stand and wait on the other side will only lead to confusion, and get this: Empty rows!
   

Guests whose party didn’t move fast enough simply would miss their train. The genius who implemented this policy ended up hurting capacity! If that was the end of it, I would have brushed it aside as a SFA peculiarity. It’s what happened next that really put my britches in the blender.
Now it’s time for the restraint check. The ride op approaches our row and first checks my SO’s restraint. “Checks” would not be the right term; it appeared more like a full bodyweight shove on the restraint, of which the result was an upset guest, and no additional clicks on the OTSR. My restraint is “checked” in a similar manner, ratcheting down one detent too far, which lovingly lodged my spine in an uncomfortable and awkward position. Neither of us were attempting to go for ‘extra room’ or anything. We had both pulled our restraints down to their natural resting position like the good, law abiding park patrons we are. But this ride op attacked my restraint like she had just lost her house in a backroom poker game to it. I have never had a ride op use as much force as that woman did to ‘check’ a restraint, and it was seriously unnecessary. Honestly, I should have signaled another ride op to release it, so I could get off the ride, walk straight out the front gate, and go spend my time in a more productive way than this, but I simply cursed under my breath, and rode the train to mid-land USA, with a layout that was less stellar than the prime cut of steak at your local Applebee's.
Okay, so Firebird sucked. Let’s ride Roar.
Roar. ???/10. Didn’t ride.
Ride op decided that my girlfriend wasn’t allowed to see during the ride, demanding our glasses. Now, this ‘requirement’ seems to only pertain to this ride, has never been protocol on the countless other times we have ridden, and was not posted on the sign identifying loose articles which are disallowed to ride. At this point, fueled from the lovely customer service experience we just had on Firebird, we quickly exited the train and walked down the exit ramp. I will say that this was the apex of our Six Flags day. Or really, I wish I could say that. But after a good ride on the Scrambler, Ragin’ Cajun, and Wild One (On which we could see that Batwing was finally cycling trains, but that walk wasn’t worth it) we decided to stop for cotton Candy.
Mind Er- Haha, just kidding. NO SLC FOR YOU!
Scrambler: 8/10. This one runs a long and fast cycle, just how I like it.
Ragin’ Cajun: 7/10. No trims, all spins. I felt like I was gonna vomit afterward, and it was pretty damn fun.
Wild One 8/10: Good ride, a bit of airtime, and golly gee that last helix is almost better than the Beast’s. What a classic!
Cotton Candy: 0/10 Food Safety
My SO got some cotton candy for the walk out of the park. The acquisition was uneventful (and gladly discounted by a small amount thanks to those passes) and we enjoyed some puffs of aerated sugar as we walked to the car. As I was driving out of the parking lot, my SO asked me to briefly pull over and take a look at the cotton candy. My first thought was, “wtf, what have they done now?” I don’t know what I was expecting, but I saw a few bits of debris, like dried leaves had been spun into the snack. Maybe this was Six Flags’ idea of flavor and texture enhancement. We threw the rest of the cotton candy out, which was the vast majority of the purchase.
Not Six Flags fault, but still: On the way out of the park, a lady in a Mercedes refused to let me merge, purposefully accelerating to prevent me from joining traffic. The person behind her opened a gap and I was able to duck in at the last second before the blend lane ended. I had my signal on the whole damn time. Just absolute perfection.
TL;DR In my mind SFA now stands for Seriously Flawed Attraction. Thank you Selim, I truly had a ‘Six Flags’ Day.

I’m currently fostering a 70lb beagle. That’s not a typo. His former person nearly fed him to death, so he’s obviously on a prescription diet and has been doing really well. He’s already down 5lbs and working really hard.
But, he’s been so good, I forgot for a minute that he’s still a beagle and I didn’t secure the trash before I left. I was only gone an hour but of course he got in there and ate who knows what. The only thing I know for sure he got were 2 fried cheese sticks I brought home from Applebees and decided I didn’t want. Fortunately I don’t think there was anything dangerous in there.
Still, I have a feeling he won’t do well at his weigh in tomorrow and I feel like I let him down. Being a foster is hard sometimes.

THE WORDS SPONSORED BY APE APPEAR ACROSS THE SCREEN
(The date May 13th 2023 is shown on the screen)
(The camera shows the view outside of a car window. The truck passes Oktibbeha county jail, the Starkville High School football field, and an Applebees before stopping at a Doublewide trailer. The camera then shows a parking cover then a flag pole with 4 flags. An American Flag, Dale Earnhardt Flag, Mississippi State Flag, and an FBE flag. The camera then opens the door revealing Cactus Mike behind it.)
Welcome into my home. Today is my 365th day in FBE which means I have been insulting and pissing off most of my contemporaries. The ones I haven’t upset I consider family such as The Ark and Ape. The Ark should be here any minute now. Well let’s go have a seat.
(Mike takes the camera into his living room where his wife, 3 kids, his brother and his In-Laws sit.)
Lucy(Mike's Mother in Law): Why are they taking so long, Mike? Why are they always late? We need to get home so we can catch Maury.
Mike: Damn, I’ve got a box set of Springer. Do you want to go to your house and watch that.
Mary: Mike, be nice.
Timmy(Mike’s 6 year old son): Daddy, when is uncle Kaze going to be here.
Mike: I don’t know Timmy, let me call him.
(Mike walks to his childrens bedroom where the closet sits open, calling Kaze on his flip phone)
Kaze: What Mike?
Mike: Timmy asked where you are. My one year anniversary is today.
Kaze: I’m at the hotel, give me 5 minutes.
Mike: Your in Oxford, that’s an hour and fifty minutes-Kaze hangs up
(Loud Music is heard)
Mary: What the hell is that Mike.
Mike: That’s Soda.
Lucy(Under her breath): What the hell is a Soda?
(Code Blue gets out of a 1965 Blue Shelby Cobra)
Code Blue (With a giant smile on his face and a giant bag to match): I brought gifts!!!!!!
Timmy and Suzie: YAY!!!!!!
Code Blue: Alright, Timmy what's your favorite car?
Timmy: A Fiat Multipla.
Code Blue: Heck yeah man, here it is.
(He hands Timmy a tiny blue Fiat Multipla)
Timmy: HELL YEAH
Lucy: (Gasps) Where did you learn that word from?
Timmy: I watch my dads promos, Gigi.
Lucy: MIKE!!!!
(Mike flips her the bird and Code Blue moves on to Suzie)
Code Blue: What’s your favorite car, Suzie.
Suzie: A big one.
(Code Blue reaches into his bag and pulls out a Disney Princess Power Wheels car)
Suzie: YAY!!! THANK YOU!!!
(Code Blue then walks over to Noah)
Mary: You know he can’t talk right Adrian?
Code Blue: Yeah I do, that's why I got him the critically acclaimed novel, “Ulysses”
Mike: He can’t read either, Soda.
Code Blue: He’ll love it later Mike, just wait.
(Code Blue then drops his bag walking over to a semi empty seat between Doug and Lucy.)
Lucy: A man of wrath stirs up strife, and one given to anger causes much transgression. Lord please help.
Code Blue: Oh damn, you know Proverbs 29:22.
(The entire room turns toward Code Blue staring at him with a stink eye.)
Code Blue: What, I’m from Texas, I basically have to know that.
(The door then opens to reveal Kaze Tanaka and his Harley Davidson Sportster sitting in the lawn)
Mike: Holy Crap, how did you get here so fast?
Kaze: Don’t worry about it.
(He then brushes past everyone else heading straight for Timmy, Noah and Suzie.)
Timmy and Suzie: Hello Uncle Kaze.
Kaze: Hey guys, I brought gifts.
Timmy and Suzie: WOOO
(Kaze pulls three pairs of small MMA Gloves and Kickpads out of his back pocket.)
Mike: What the hell are those for?
Kaze: They are for Kickboxing. Not everyone has to be a brawler, Mike.
(The camera pans over to the couch where Code Blue sits, staring at Lucy’s blanket.)
Code Blue: Did you make that on your own Lucy?
Doug(Mike's Father In Law): Yeah, she spends too much money on that crap.
Code Blue: Well I think it’s great. I’m actually a bit of a knitter myself.
Lucy: Oh, really…
(A knitting conversation then starts between the two. Doug then goes to check his “Mississippi Pot Roast.)
Kaze: Who wants to watch High&Low 2 while we wait on Logan.
Timmy and Suzie: ME!!!
(Kaze pulls up the movie on his cell phone to watch.)
Doug: Hey Mary where the hell are your pot holders?
Mary: Oh, they are in the cabinet under the sink. I’ll get them for you.
Doug: No, I’ll get them. You know my rule of not looking at the food until it's done.
Mary: Ok, Dad.
(Mike steps outside to avoid the chaos)
????: Hey, Dipshit
Mike: (Under his breath) Goddamnit, what's up Larry.
Larry(Mike’s boss at Applebees who has unfavorable opinions of him): Is today your 1 year anniversary.
Mike: Yeah, why?
Larry: I have a present for you.
(He hands Mike a VHS tape.)
Larry: I hope you enjoy it. I went through a lot to get it.
Mike: Thank’s Larry
(The moment is interrupted by a loud honk as a Solar Powered Car enters the drive-way.)
Mike: What’s up, Logan?
Logan: Hey Mike, congratulations on your 1 year anniversary.
Mike: Thank you, Logan.
(The two walk inside.)
Kaze: Hey Logan.
Code Blue: Hey Logan.
Mary: Hey Logan.
Timmy and Suzie: Hey Uncle Logan.
Logan: Hey guys.
Mike: Alright everyone gather around. I got a gift from Larry so let's get ready to watch.
(Kaze, Timmy and Suzie all sit on the floor as Doug takes his seat on the couch beside Code Blue. Logan pulls up a chair from the kitchen table sitting beside Noah’s bouncy seat. Mary sits on an old recliner. And after Mike inserts the tape into the VCR Mike and Fred take a seat beside Kaze and the kids.)
(The tape opens with Larry singing a terrible rendition of I Hate Everything About You by Ugly Kid Joe.)
Logan: Mike, this sucks so far.
Mike: Yeah it's pretty damn terrible.
Code Blue: I have some music we can play.
Mike: No thanks, Soda.
(After the bad singing, Misery is shown on screen.)
Larry: So, why do you hate my underling Cactus Mike.
Misery:“I hate Cactus Mike because the bastard survived me. Twice. He made me a liar. I said I’d take his title, and because that asshole wouldn’t stay down, I didn’t.”
(Mike turns toward the camera)
Mike: Damn… I didn’t know I made Marcella that upset. But I’m glad she admitted that she’s a liar. Lucyifer, how do you feel about Marcella.
Lucy: I like the name Marcella. Misery sounds too scary though.
Kaze: Alright what's next.
(Mike pushes play as Mark Steel is shown)
Larry: Why do you hate the redneck trash that works for me?
Mark Steel: The reason I hate Cactus Mike? Where do I start? He formed a group with Kaze Tanaka, a dude who sat back while Joey cut my head open. He single handedly gave DTJ a headache for a whole month just cause he was a champion. Truth be told, I just don't like that prick.
(Mark stands up and walks out pissed)
(Kaze is shown on camera)
Kaze: "Yeah keep talking like that and I'll cut it open again."
Timmy: YEAH. He’ll kill you.
Mike: Calm down, Timmy.
Lucy: OH MY GOSH. I CAN’T BELIEVE HE SAID THAT. GET OUT KAZE.
(The room goes silent.)
Code Blue: Hey, what's your favorite Bible verse?
Lucy: Oh, thats a tough one, let me think.
Mike: I thought he’d love me since I made DTJ relevant.
(Logan is seen playing with Noah using a toy doctors kit)
(Mike pushes play again)
Larry: Why do you hate the world's worst wrestler?
John: “When I became the longest reigning Junior Heavyweight Champion, all
everyone talked about was Cactus Mike this or Cactus Mike that when I was kicking ass and taking names. But out of nowhere that overrated southern comes in my division and tries to steal my spotlight when he couldn’t lace my fucking boots!!! That’s why I hate that white trash paper champion.”
(Mike covers his mouth in a sarcastic shock.)
Mike: Logan, you should take this one.
Logan: Ok, I didn’t know I cured your mutism.
Mike: Good one, Logan. I’m sorry that some people like me unlike you. Hell that promo put Fred to sleep.
(Fred is seen snoring on the ground)
Mike: WAKE UP BITCH.
Fred: Uhh, I'm up.
Logan: Damn, he gave Fred sleep apnea.
(Mike presses play)
Larry: Mr… Uh, Why do you hate Cactus Mike.
Jason Beggs: “The son of a bitch took the spotlight from me, I think that’s enough for me to hate him.”
Kaze: Mike, who the heck was that.
Code Blue: He was my first win.
Mike: I’m glad one of us knows who that is.
Logan: Mike, I think Noah had an accident.
Mike: Damnit, I’ll get it.
(Logan hands the baby to Mike who takes Noah to his nursery)
Mike: Someone press play, I can hear it from in here.
(Timmy runs over to the remote and presses play)
Larry: This is the coolest person I’ve interviewed. The only person to take the fight to Mike in a good, respectable way. Happy. Why do you hate Cactus Mike?
Happy: A lot of people think I hate Mike. I don’t understand why people think that. I mean, sure I tried to kill his wife and kids and I tried to kill him a few times. And he burned my circus tent, my biggest form of income, down to the ground. And sure we’ve beaten each other to bloody pulps. And yeah, he helped found a group of wrestlers that have always had the biggest targets on me. And maybe, there was some scheming to get Tickles the Clown to perform at his kids birthday party.
Does that really mean we hate each other?
Yes, yes it does. Fuck Cactus Mike. He’s a prick.
Timmy: AHHH
(Timmy and Suzie scramble towards their mom.)
Code Blue: That bastard.
Lucy: ADRIAN
(Code Blue turns towards Mike who storms out of the Nursery)
Code Blue: Calm down.
Mike: That douchebag. I’ll be back.
(Mike sets Noah in Code Blues arms. Storms out the door as a terrible aroma goes throughout the air.)
Doug: (under his breath) Damnit
Mary: What is that?
Doug: My pot roast, give me a bit it's burning
Logan: Let me help, I have an idea.
Doug: NO, its my roast.
Lucy: Let him help dumbass.
(Everyone is shocked and looks at Lucy)
Lucy: What, I am human after all.
(She shoots a smile at Code Blue)
Doug: Come here Logan
(Logan hops up to help.)
(Meanwhile Fred and Kaze walk outside)
Fred: You're from Japan right?
Kaze: Yeah
Fred: Oh, so you don’t get to do this often.
(Fred pulls out a blunt and passes it to Kaze as the two smoke)
(Meanwhile, Code Blue has taken Noah back to the nursery)
Noah: WAHHHHH
Code Blue: (Frantically) What’s wrong buddy. Do you want a binky?
(Blue hands him the Binky but Noah tosses it back)
Code Blue: (Frantically) How about… this watch.
(Code Blue takes off his watch, handing it to Noah.)
(Noah holds the watch)
Code Blue: Oh, do you like watches? Well, so do I.
(Blue pulls out his phone and begins to look at watches with Noah.)
(Meanwhile, Kaze and Fred have gotten increasingly high)
Fred: I bet you can’t punch through this.
(He lifts up an old piece of wood)
Kaze: Yeah I can.
(Kaze punches straight through the wood)
Fred: Goddamn, you're a badass. I guess we should go back inside.
Kaze: Ok lets go.
(Fred goes inside as Kaze stands at the stairs)
Kaze: (under his breath) Damn that hurt.
(Mike is then shown parking his truck and walking up to a door.)
Mike:OPEN THE DOOR
(The door opens to reveal Larry)
Larry: Why the hell are you at my house.
Mike: You're a sick, sad man. Interviewing the man who tried to kill me and my kids. For what, Larry to prove a point.
Larry: I am proving to everyone you should be hated.
Mike: You're a bald headed douchebag.
Larry: Thank you
(Larry turns around when Mike puts his hand on his shoulder)
Mike: Look, I've let your bald headed ass get away with a lot but not this one. I need the Applebees job, more than I need you to like me. But I know someone you will listen to. HANK.
(A large redneck man lumbers down the stairs behind Larry)
Mike: Your son told the world this was his house.
Larry: No-
Hank: You dumbass. This is mine and your mothers house that we allow you to live in. Get back to your damn room before I give you a whippin.
Larry: (Sadly) Yes dad.
Mike: See ya, Hank
Hank: Bye, Mike.
(A little while later Mike knocks his door)
(Doug opens the door with his head hung low)
Mike: What's wrong with you?
(Doug points towards the kitchen where Logan is chopping and cooking like a Food Network Star)
Mike: Cheer up, you're with family, just enjoy it. HEY SODA, I’m back.
(Code Blue walk’s out with Noah who is holding the watch)
Mike: Why the hell does he have a watch?
Code Blue: He likes it.
Mike: Alright. Hey everyone, I’m booting the VCR back up.
Logan: I’ll be in there in a bit.
Mike: Ok
(Mike picks up the abandoned remote and presses play)
(This one begins abruptly without Larry's intro)
(Text appears across the screen)
Kaze: What the fuck is happening
It’s the one anniversary since Cactus Mike’s debut in FBE, a year later who would believe that a redneck would be fan favorite in this company and with being at the top of the mountain you are sure to have several rivals who want the throne.
It’s Firestorm 117, after an intense thirteen-minute battle Joshua Epps defeated his DTJ teammate, Mark Steel in the opening match of the show. After walking to the back, Epps cooled down a bit from his victory but came across an old rival… across from him was FBE Television Champion, Cactus Mike, the two shared a minor stare down from one another. Epps stared at the television title bringing back some memories between the two, as the champion walked away you could see the pain and hunger within Epps eyes.
A few minutes later... After Cactus Mike successfully defended his championship against Bengt Holm, watching from the back was Joshua Epps and approaching him was Larry, an Applebee’s manager and All Around awesome dude. He yelled.
Mike: Oh, we know which bald bastard wrote this.
“What?!”
A little shook, Larry stood his ground and asked.
“Sorry to bother, but next week will be Cactus Mike’s one year celebration and I wanted to know why you hate my personal bitch”
As he took a deep breath, he nodded to get his camera ready. After he got the camera ready, Epps said.
“Mike, it’s been one year since your debut and I must admit you’ve done more than Jake Mayhem but that’s not a far reach, for those who don’t know about our history… It goes back to the road to BTE, when people were saying that we were the future of this company and at that show we competed in Ultimate X where you scared me in the face. While you continued to live life, I remained broken until that fear turned into fire and we competed for the first time, ending in a draw.
After that encounter, we had people craving for us to have another battle, but we went our separate paths with you winning the Television title and as I became a part of DTJ... And I know you remembered when we left you lifeless in that ring, but that wasn’t it. After months, you and I ran it back but for the Television Championship and I walked out the victor. Now, I see you have regained the championship and defending thinking that life is all good celebrating with friends and family, but I refuse to let this slide. I know you have numerous contenders but Mike… I’m gunning for you. Happy Anniversary and tell the family Papa Josh said hello.”
Mike: Hey guys, Papa John said hello.
Fred: Hola, Papa John.
Mike: What the fuck is wrong with you?
Lucy: MIKE, no F’s
Mike: Jeez.
Mike: Anyway, Epps bring it on, any time. Unlike the previous champ I show up.
(Code Blue continues to look at watches with Noah while Logan cooks and Kaze sits with a blank stare.)
(Mike pushes play)
Larry: My next guest is a guy who has gotten smarter over time. Why do you hate Cactus Mike, Craneo?
Craneo: "Mike is a damn selfish piece of shit. We had the tournament, I was willing to do it for the team, he wasn't. What can you expect from a redneck anyway, makes me furious just thinking about it. Incompetent man, awful fighter, atrociously arrogant, a bad father probably. Hope he chokes on his own puke and dies on his sleep, now get the fuck out of here before I give you a new hole on your head."
(Mike pauses it)
Kaze: "Ah yes, the TV Champion brought the team down. Not the 5th most important member of PROSPECT."
Mike: "PROSTATE"
(Kaze sneers)
Kaze: "Yeah that."
Mike: I’m a lot of things but a bad father ain’t one. Everything else you said sure. I’m incompetent, a competent man wouldn’t have teamed with you. I’m not a 5 star athlete, I get the job done. You can call that awful but I wouldn’t. And finally, you may be right if anyone has been around cocky it’s you.
Code Blue: YOURS TRULY.
Lucy: I always liked him.
Code Blue: I’m starting to see Mike’s issues with you. (Blue turns to Noah and lifts him.) Yours Truly sucks yes he does.
Mike: How's it going Logan, do you need any help?
Logan: I’m fine, Mike give me ten minutes.
Mike: Ok, good luck.
(Mike presses play)
Larry: This is a biggy. Why exactly does a blackhole like you hate Cactus Mike?
Ripley: You wouldn’t think that a Literal Black Hole would have feelings….however stranger things have happened. See when I metamorphosed myself into this vessel you see before you I found myself craving the idea of physical brutality. The kind of feeling only animals get when an outsider approaches their turf and threatens their way of life. That’s why I came to FBE to experience such brutality. One mortal soul I’ve crossed paths with has tested my physical capabilities and has even bested me in combat in which he’s earned my respect. But this mortal that goes by the name of Cactus Mike confuses my respect for admiration. I do not like him. The reason I do not fancy the idea of liking Mike is for a simple reason. He needs to be heard and feels he’s earned the admiration of his peers. Dislike isn’t even the right word…loathe? Detest? Abhor? Despise? Any of those would fit the world's amount better in that sentence than dislike. My feelings for Mike aren’t as complex as my own existence. Mike I hope you will continue to make a fool of yourself in this locker room because it’s the most entertaining thing you can probably pull off. Now if you’re looking for sentiment at the end of this statement you’re looking in all the wrong places. I’m here to be nothing more than a passing nemesis…..it may be a Happy one year to Mike but for the rest of FBE it’s a painful memory of when the little cactus that could barged his way into everyone’s life.”
(Mike pauses it)
Mike: Five seconds in everyone knew this was BS.
Fred: HA he thinks he's a black hole.
Mike: Ripley, Believe it or not, no one believes you're a blackhole.
(Mike presses play)
Larry: So why do you hate Cactus Mike, Starkville’s true hero.
Jay Castle is sitting with his feet up on a desk belonging to the Applebee's manager Larry. Jay is sat behind the desk in Larry’s chair, making himself feel more than at home as Larry sits in the cramped chair he forces his minimum wage workers to sit in when they’re being chewed out.
“So why do I hate Cactus Mike? Lenny, I could talk about that for hours.”
Larry shifts in his seat to correct Jay’s mistake.
“Actually Mr. Castle, my name is Larry…”
“Leroy, I hate Mike because he seems to have all these people fooled. They see him as this nice family man from humble beginnings who’s just doing the best he can… but nobody seems to be asking any questions about him. Like why is he still living in a trailer park?”
Jay drops his feet off the desk before doing a quick spin to reach into Larry’s mini fridge to steal a beer. Jay cracks open the can of Bud Light then takes a healthy swig.
“Mike, we make more money in this profession than some people could dream of having, so why are you still keeping your family in a trailer? I mean I blow my money on dumbshit all the time, hell I’m a no good drunk. But with all your merch sales and all those big champ bonuses you’d think that you’d have some cash squirreled away somewhere.”
“But maybe you got a monkey on your back. You can’t put down the bottle? You spend all your paychecks at the roulette table? Maybe you got a little bit of a ‘nasal issue’
Jay mockingly sniffs and wipes his nose. He polishes off the remains of his beer before reaching for another, he pauses for a moment as he notices that it’s the last one in the fridge.
“Levi you don’t mind if I grab the last one, do you?”
Larry clears his throat to speak up but is quickly interrupted by Jay taking the beer anyway, Larry looks down defeatedly.
“Anyway, Mike you’re just white trash who doesn’t know how to handle a steady income. You can buy as much bullshit as you want cause those kids at home only matter to you when you’re not on tour. Hell, a good clown friend of mine visited them more than you did at some points.’
“But you have been here for a year, and I can’t say I don’t respect you. Even though you’re white trash you gotta admit that trash is hard to get rid of, so I suppose you and I are stuck with each other for many years to come.”
Jay finishes his beer, tossing it into a garbage can that now contains an entire 24 pack worth of empty beer cans.
“Happy anniversary, you son of a bitch.”
(Mike pauses it)
Mike: Goddamn, this one’s fitting. The first match I competed in and my first win. Jay, the reason I still live in a trailer is to put my kids through college. Not because I get too comfy with Jack. Not everybody shares the love of drunkenness like “Starkville's favorite alcoholic”
Code Blue: What has he done anyway.
Mike: Not much Soda.
(Mike presses play for the last time)
Larry: Finally, Hunter Magurie, why do you hate Cactus Mike?
“Larry, that is the stupidest fucking question I have ever heard in my life. You have dragged me away from going on a week long bender before the last Shining League thing whatever the fuck its called when I will be crowned the winner of the group, a group which funnily has your little bum buddy in it. And also funnily enough I face your bum buddy next week… wait, was this your plan all along? YOU FUCKING PRICK!! Fine, I’ll answer your stupid dumb fucking question for your stupid dumb fucking lover. I hate Cactus Mike because I think he’s insufferable. Tedious. Annoying. Why did you even hire him? Did his wife give you a Sloppy Joe to convince you to give him the job? I’m getting off track here, that’s personal affairs that I should probably keep quiet or he’ll threaten me again with something silly. Oh, and I beat him once and what happened? He won a title the next week. And guess what? I didn’t get my deserved title match. Am I still salty about it? A bit, but once that dodgy league thingy with second rate wrestlers is over and I beat whoever’s got the Pure Championship, it’ll be off my mind a bit. So yeah, that’s essentially it. I hate Mike cause he’s Mike. And this little charade game you two are playing with me right now is a bit fucking annoying. And you know what happens when I get annoyed Larry? I beat the living fuck out of the closest thing to me.”
Hunter then proceeds to beat up Larry, leaving him in a heap in the Applebees car park. Hunter stands over Larry’s beaten body and addresses Mike.
“See you next week Mike! You may hope to god that I don’t pull that off on you.”
Mike: Goddamn, I didn't know I’d come out of that liking the actor.
Logan: WHO WANTS SOME BEEF WELLINGTON!!!!!
Kaze and Fred: Yep
Timmy and Suzie: WE DO!!
(Lucy and Mary calmly stand up as Doug wallows over to the table.)
Mike: What the hell is Beef Wellington?
Logan: It’s great Mike, just sit down and I’ll get you a plate.
(Code Blue rises from the couch holding Noah and sets him in the playpen)
(Noah begins to giggle as he waves to Blue and Blue waves back)
(The big oddball family sits at the table as Logan serves the Beef Wellington. The camera shows each member of the family before the screen goes black showing the words.)
THANK YOU.

Hi All,
I moved to NH a few years ago, first Dover then Manchester area. I can't find a decent corn dog to save my life. Applebee's has corndogs, but they are lackluster. Red Robin has mini corn dogs I think, but I heard they are discontinuing.
I go to the Deerfield fair among others every year because it's the only place I can find a decent dog. Otherwise I have to drive to the nearest Sonic down in Mass to get a good corndog. Does anyone know where I can go to get one? Really anywhere within an hour of Manchester is fine.
Edit: Looking to find a fast food place or restaurant that has them. I know there are frozen corn dogs at the store.

Being born and raised in this general area I felt it would be a nice gesture to share a bit about the town in terms of recommended go-to spots for eating and any other fun activities before the show.
The Corbin Arena itself is at the top of a hill. At the bottom of the hill is a big strip of restaurants you can stop at including some fast food joints, a Mexican restaurant, Applebees and a southern BBQ buffet. Applebees is the closest restaurant to the venue but given its nature, especially on a Friday night near summer, it’s gonna be pretty packed.
The Mexican restaurant is pretty quality food but it can be pricy depending on what you get. The southern BBQ, Bubby’s as it’s called, is excellent buffet bang for your buck but the place is so popular it pretty much is first come first serve and the buffet could run dry if you come in at the wrong time (the daily hours are a bit weird too so keep that in mind). If you simply want to pass the time there is also a movie theatre right along the same strip as well.
If you want other options but don’t want to stray too far away from the venue Main St. is a fairly short drive south and has a few hidden gems. There’s a pinball museum that charges you $15 per person for unlimited play on machines, arcade games and bowling. There’s also an escape room but it opens at 4 PM so if you want to do the escape room and dine in somewhere you might be cutting it close to show time. A few fun coffee shops down that way too (I recommend the place You, Me, Coffee & Tea).
If you don’t want to do anything along that strip there are a good handful of selections along the southern half of town as your driving along US 25-E. A few Chinese buffets, a sports grill & bar, another Mexican restaurant, various little outlet stores to shop in and the Sanders Cafe & Museum (aka the first KFC).
If you want to stick closer to where you get off of I-75 at Exit 29 there is a big strip with lots of options. There’s a few major stores like GameStop and Walmart if you need to pick something up. If you’re into Magic The Gathering there’s a small hole-in-the-wall little card shop towards the end of the strip as you reach Taco Bell. A nice Philly Cheesesteak place called Philly Connection as well.
As for venue parking The Arena is basically the size of your typical rec center or a super-sized high school gym so it’s spacious inside and decent parking. I can’t really recommend a good time to get there but my current plan is to arrive right around 6:15. The concessions are typical sports game affair with basic alcohol options, not much to say there.
I hope this helps any of you coming in out of town and here’s to enjoying the show! As always any and all input is welcomed and thanks for reading! 🙂

I need to preface this by saying I am not well off. I live at home with my dogs on a $14/hr job. I make enough to get buy but I'm not living am extravagant lifestyle.
My sister is even worse off with 2 kids and a husband who's fucking useless. We have a history of asking me to put bills in my name because I make sure they are paid off.
They asked me if I would put their car on my insurance for a month so they could get tags. I said no because I didn't feel right with it.
I get a call yesterday from my nieces school (12 years old) that no one has gone to pick her up from school for over 30 minutes.
I can't get ahold of them so I leave work and pick her up myself. I'm pretty upset so I say "You hungry? I'm hungry. What's a restaurant you have never been to but have always wanted to go to?"
So we went to Applebee's for a nice meal before taking her home. We get back to her home 2 hours later. They didn't even know they forgot her until just before I pulled into the driveway.
I find it they have no phone service and no power.
I just feel like I need to help but I know in my heart that I can't. They would waste it but they started to tell me it's my fault because I didn't put their car on my insurance. That they had to spend their power bill money to get their car legal.

Edit: language and typos.
This is an OC and true story, and I already posted this in trueoffmychest. My wife and I recently found two hot takes and love it, so why not try and get their perspective.
I (28M) recently got a Facebook message from someone I don’t know. It basically says: “Hey, my name is Guy (fake name) I’m your half brother, we have the same dad. I was shocked when I first found out years ago, but we look a lot alike and I just wanted to reach out and get to know each other if that’s something you’re open to”.
I didn’t believe it because my parents are high school sweethearts, they are still happily even after having me at 18. I only have 1 brother, 22M, that’s full blood, and my parents are happily married so I thought that there’s no way I could have another sibling. I looked at his profile and sure enough, we look damn near identical. It’s freaky how similar we look. He looks more like my grandpa than I do. We started talking and I got more of his story, careful not to share too much from my side, and sure enough EVERYTHING he said lines up with my memories of that time in my life. With how old he is, I would have been 5 when my dad cheated and he was born just before my 6th birthday and about a month before my little brother was born.
Facts that I remember: -I had a 4th birthday party where my mom was helping me get dressed. I was definitely 4 because I remember taking my mom “I’m 4 today” as she was putting a little bow tie on me. So I have memories from before this happened. -I remember my mom and dad spent some time living apart, just a couple weeks, when I was little but was never able to know what timeframe in my early childhood it happened. I never knew why and looking back on it, I always thought, “they were young and fighting, probably needed to spend some time apart, it’s probably nothing they’re happy now.” -And I remember my dad’s old truck had a lot of damage to one of the doors and some of the bed. Again, always looked back and thought he was in an accident and they could never afford to fix it.
I didn’t tell my supposed half brother any of this because I wanted to see how his story (from what his mom told him) lined up. From what he said, my dad and his friend were on a work trip on the other side of the state when they were around 22, they met at an Applebees, she started dating his friend, and all of them, including my mom, became friends. Guy’s mom and my dad soon became a thing (unclear if that started before or after my parents decided to take a break. It could have been the cause of the break for sure. Just don’t have that detail nailed down) My mom was also pregnant with my little brother at this time, so her being full of hormonal rage and pissed at my dad, drove across the state when she found out my dad was staying with Guy’s mom. Apparently, according to Guy’s mom, I was in the back seat of her car while she rammed my dads truck repeatedly with her car. I have no memory of this, but I wouldn’t doubt something that traumatic got repressed. I’m sure they were fighting a lot during this time, I also don’t remember any of that. She called my dad when Guy was born, my mom picked up and that’s when my mom found out that Guy’s mom was pregnant. Guy’s mom said she didn’t want anything, no child support, nothing, that my dad wouldn’t even be on the birth certificate.
There’s also other small things that make me believe the story more. For instance, he said in terms of allergies, he’s only allergic to cats. My dad and I are also only allergic to cats. There’s no way for him to know that, plus anything from that time in my life, only I or my parents would know any of this.
My parents aren’t rich by any means. My grandpa owns their house and they’re still paying off their cars. My entire life they’ve lived paycheck to paycheck, not sure how they are fairing now, but the point is they have nothing for him to go after. And he hasn’t asked for anything, he even said he didn’t want to cause any drama in my family, that he just wants to talk and see if me and my brother want to get to know each other.
I found this out right as I was studying for and about to take 4 College finals, so I was already stressed. The first night I was so distraught, I only got 3 hours of sleep. The next night was a little better, and it’s been getting better since. But I haven’t talked to my parents, I almost had an anxiety attack when my mom sent us a TikTok. I told my little brother a couple days after I found out and I told him that I needed almost a week for me to finish my finals and and move past the emotional stage before adding this to my mental load. He agreed because he also needed time to process, so we’re going to talk to them in a couple days. I can’t even think about how that conversation will go. I’m very open to getting to know Guy, and I’m not upset with him at all. I’m mad at my parents from hiding this. I don’t think any of my family knows. Guy is about to have a baby, I’m going to be an uncle, and my dad is about to be a grandpa. I can’t give my grandparents their first great grandchild.
I’m not sure what I expect from posting this, but I enjoy reading other people’s stories, and this is my one chance to give back I guess? If you have any advice let me know, for sure I’m going to look into therapy. If anyone wants an update, I’ll post one after we confront our parents.
Also, in case this does get on the pod, my wife has been such an incredible support through all of this. I truly can’t thank her enough. I love you!

Hello I recently just started my career at applebees and I'm going in for training today, does anyone who also works as a server in Maine , what is the hourly pay? I can't find out for some reason

Parents wanted to have a honey-moon week since they could afford it finally. I had to stay with an uncle who was verbally and physically abusive to my cousin's. I hardly remember the week but I remember the feeling of longing. I was real young.
Parents moved houses. Told me to take a certain bus. But I have this thing where if it feels inconsequential I'll think about doing the right thing but just blunder through anyway. I took the same bus and ended up crying in a neighborhood until a utility guy took me to the right address. I was real young too.
I use to have this thing where if I was real hungry my joints would hurt. I think it's a blood Suger thing. One day I'm real hungry and begin crying. My dad locked me into my bedroom because there was a visiter he needed to deal with. I cried and cried in a chair because my joints hurt so bad. Once I calmed down I was allowed to come out and eat some taquitos and salsa at the table. I was young for that too.
My parents bought a Bowflex or a workout machine or something when I was young. I began using it and my parents joked to take it easy or you'll feel it later. I kept going. A couple hours later I had terrible muscle pain. I laid on the couch and cried while my parents laughed telling me they told me so. I remember just wanting my ma to sit and soothe me. I could of used an aspirin or something.
I joined the boyscouts in 5-6 grade. Went to a weeklong scouting trip. Sometime after a couple of days I was home sick and I just needed to talk. I convinced the troop master to let me call home. They wouldn't pick up. I cried a lot in the booth. Scout master got in contact with my parents that night and they picked me up the next day. I couldn't hack it.
In college I was having a real tough time. On an extended weekend I called my parents to come spend the weekend with them. I unfortunately flipped my jeep at a local party so I didn't have transportation. I went to a school and hour away I didn't think it would be a problem. They came, I loaded up my laundry, we went to get something to eat, got a haircut, and then they took me right back to the apartment with 100$. I remember staring out the window at the Applebee's when they were telling me they weren't taking me back for the weekend. I took that 100 and bought a lot of weed.
Before I went off to the military I didn't have a place to stay because my lease was up and It was before shipping date. I called my mom to ask if I can stay at home for the time being. She told me no and to stay with some extended family. They have mental health problems. Recluses, mentally challenged kids. Those two weeks were a blur and not nice. I remember reading Steinbeck and reading about some boy leaving little gifts for his mother and his mother assuming it was his abusive brother. I remember really relating to Adam Trask.

I just tried cinnamon rolls and I really liked them. When I was younger one time I ate a little bit raw and I really liked it then. I know now that eating a little bit raw wasn't a good idea because it could make you sick but I didn't get sick and I think it was only once. My mom and dad would buy me cinnamon rolls just so I could eat the icing in the container. Like 4 hours ago I told my dad I was wanting to try cinnamon rolls because for some reason I been like really wanting them. I smelled them when I opened the container and I love the smell but after they was done cooking the smell was a little different.
Like the cinnamon smell was not as strong and I really like the strong cinnamon smell. My niece tried one first (she is 8) and she made a face and I asked her if she liked it. But she didn't answer that and just said it was really burnt on the bottom, so it made me not want to eat it. But after a couple mins I smelled it again and looked how burnt they were (because our oven is weird like it burns everything on the bottom and still will be doughy on the top). I took a bite but didn't eat the bottom of it at all and I loved it but it didn't have enough icing. I ate 3 of them but it would probably only add up to one since I didn't eat the bottom of them.
On April 16th was my 2 brothers birthdays (one turned 28 and my other brother 32) and we all went to the zoo. Then afterwards my sister and my older brother was deciding where to go to eat because they was wanting to try to pick somewhere I would like something. But I didn't want them to do that because I wanted them to pick where they all wanted because I always eat afterwards when I get home. So they decided on Eat N Park and I like the icing on their cookies there but not the actual cookies. I started to look at the kids menu and was going to get the pizza or chicken strips I usually try at restaurants but I hardly ever like them.
Then I looked at the adults menu and saw mac n cheese as a side dish and decided to try that. I really like mac n cheese but haven't eaten it in a long time and only ever ate it being cooked on the stone. At Eat N Park it was baked so I wasn't used to that and I always said I would never eat mac n cheese like that. Because it always looked gross to me so I just always assumed that it was gross. But I decided to try it because it actually looked really good except the top layer because it was hard so I removed the top layer.
I really liked it and my older brother's girlfriend asked me if I liked it and I said it wasn't bad (that was after only one bite and it got better and better after that) and she said that's improvement. No one knows I have ARFID except my mom, dad, and my brother the one that is 28. Like everyone else just thinks I'm super super picky. I was so happy I was finally eating food with my family at a restaurant and I was able to eat all of the mac n cheese except the hard bites and some bites didn't look to good. I also tried their vanilla milkshake and I really liked it as well.
I already like vanilla milkshakes but only from McDonald's and I haven't had one in years because it always has chocolate in it or it's too vanillay. Also like on April 14th maybe I tried a little sip of my niece vanilla milkshake at Lovie's (it's an ice cream shop I love but never tried their milkshakes) It was really good. The only bad thing is now since I liked Eat N Park they said that we might just keep going there which I like for me but for my brother (that just turned 28) I feel bad now. Because he has ARFID too(not diagnosed but he has it because he only have a couple foods like me and I'm diagnosed with it) and he really likes the burgers at Applebee's and he didn't really like the burgers at Eat N Park. So I'm hoping I can get them to go to Applebee's every so often like take turns with the 2 restaurants. It was a really fun day for me and for my family.
Also don't know if these count as victories I also started to eat Doritos and Ritz crackers with cheese in those little plastic containers again after a few years not eating those 2 things. I'm so happy with all of this.

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I hadn’t wanted to go to Applebees, but my friends insisted.
I’m not opposed to going out to have a meal, but I hate going to the Applebees in our town. It’s a gathering place for every half drunk Chad and happy hour drunk who doesn’t have enough money to drink at the yacht club but too much class for the Tilted Stool. We aren’t big drinkers. I mean, we like to tie a few on sometimes, but these guys get downright sloppy. We get the booth as far from the bar as we can, but it’s still so damn noisy in there! By the end of the night, we’re all yelling at each other just to be heard over the jukebox and the drunks. I spend the rest of the night with my eardrums pounding and my head ready to crack open.
At least that’s how it had always been until tonight.
So we were at the back booth, like always, when I saw the guy. Mark was talking about some girl he was seeing from work, Frank laughing like a donkey. His latest drink bounced around, threatening to spill as he pounded the table, and I looked up from my cowboy burger just in time to see this guy hunkered over his food at the end of the row. He was bent over his plate, the top of his bald head gleaming, and the light over heard lit him like a wax sculpture.
I’m not usually one for people watching, but this guy stood out. He reminded me of a story from Temple, back when I still went with my parents. They told us a story about a guy who had built a creature to get revenge, a golem, and that was my first thought when I saw this fella. That sounds a little harsh, but I only mean that he appeared not like a man, but like the approximation of a man. He had on a white button up, a red tie hanging loose around his neck like a noose, and even from here, I could see the sweat starting to pool under his arms. Despite the noise, I could almost hear him perfectly.
At first I thought he was eating his meal loudly, bent over at the waist like a dog, but the longer I watched, the more I thought he might be crying.
His shoulders were hitching in slow up and down jerks, and he appeared to be sobbing into his plate. I felt a little voyeuristic as I watched him live what was likely the worst day of his life. Poor guy had probably been stood up for a date or lost his mother, and here I was watching.
When Mark leaned nearly into my ear, I jumped a little when he spoke.
“Whatcha lookin at, pally?”
He followed my line of sight, and found the poor guy before I could.
“Whoa! That’s a guy who's got a date with a rope later.”
Frank turned to look, but winced as Mark kicked him.
“Don’t look. Ain’t you got no sense? Poor guy. Looks like this guy we had in the Gas station the other night. He comes in, high as a kite, and when I wouldn’t sell him beer, he just starts crying and,”
Mark went on but I wasn’t really paying attention anymore.
I felt a little bad for continuing to watch him, but I just couldn’t turn away. Something about him was mesmerizing. It was like driving past a car crash and being unable to stop staring at the bodies on the pavement. You knew it was wrong to stare, but you just couldn’t stop. Frank was braying laughter again, and I could see our waitress contemplating whether to offer him another beer as she took our empty plates away. Mark told her he was fine, Frank ordered another beer, and after several tense seconds, and an elbow from Mark, I snapped back to myself and said I was okay.
“Jeez, buddy.” Mark said as the waitress shuffled off, “You gonna go over there and propose?”
“What are you talking about?” I asked, biting into my burger and realized was luke warm.
Had I really been staring at the poor guy as my hamburger turned to ice?
“You've been staring at him for almost ten minutes. I thought you were gonna order him a drink for a minute.”
We all laughed, mine being a little forced, and then Mark stood up and waved to a pair coming through the door. Jim and his wife, Selene, waved at us in turn, and Frank moved to our side of the table so the two love birds could sit together. They had been inseparable since college, and I don’t think I had ever seen one without the other more than a handful of times. They excused their lateness, their sitter had been late, and Jim started in on a story about how she had gotten lost and turned down the wrong road when I turned my attention back to the poor guy two booths down.
He was still bent over his burger, still quietly sobbing, but the way his shoulders moved had started to seem wrong. I was no expert on sobbing, but this guy's herky jerky movements were starting to look like something else. A rational part of me chastised myself for continuing to stare at this poor fellow, but I was like a moth to flame now. He was my car wreck, and I was starting to notice signs of foul play.
When he snorted loudly, I heard the laughter for the first time.
It made me shiver a little as I heard it thrum into me like badly played piano notes. The guy wasn’t crying, he was laughing. The more I looked, the more I could see bits of meat and lettuce sprayed over the table top. The longer I looked, the more I wondered how I had misunderstood his laughter for crying? I was now drawn deeper into his web of strangeness, no escape in sight. Crying was one thing, I could understand crying, but who sat in a booth by themselves and laughed? Was he a nut? Some kind of mental case who was off his meds? Watching him from behind Selene’s shoulder, I wondered if he might be dangerous? Maybe we should leave, maybe I should suggest a change of venue, but all thought escaped me as he finally lifted his head from the plate.
The scream that welled up inside me was cut off by my constricting throat, and likely sounded like nothing so much as a sigh.
The mans face looked like a fantastic bit of prosthesis. He was like a piece of halloween decoration that's just a little too realistic, the kind you worry might contain a person who wants to bite. His face looked like the front of a thumb, calloused and rippled with wrinkles or ridges. His eyes were like colorless slits, something slashed into his face with a knife. His nose appeared to be drawn on, like a cartoon character. He was unreal, something that shouldn’t exist in polite society outside a circus tent.
His mouth, though.
His mouth was the worst.
His mouth was full of long needlelike teeth, reminding me of an angler fish as it protruded from his thin lips. Those teeth looked like they would never close comfortably. From here, it looked like they would constantly poke at your lips and gums and you would be in agony most of the time. There were pieces of meat on those teeth, red raw chunks that had been speared by them, and that's when I looked down at his plate. It was covered in the remains of raw hamburger meat. I doubted like hell that the staff had just handed this guy raw beef, but the alternative seemed even wilder. The alternative was that this man had brought his own raw meat from home so he could just consume it here in public.
As the horror ran through me like ice water, I looked up to see those colorless slits observing me.
The two of us just stared at each other for a count of five, and then he pulled those thin lips and monstrous teeth into a smile and I could see red pooling at the edges of his flesh.
I glanced over at Mark and Frank, both now sitting on this side of the booth, but neither of them had noticed him. The four of them were involved in a conversation like there wasn’t a monster sitting twelve feet away. It seemed impossible that anyone could be having a normal conversation so close to this creature. Its very presence should have triggered some ancient, primal node deep in our brains, and forced us to either destroy it or flee from it. The four of them were talking about jobs and school and Jim and Selene’s daughter while this thing got to exist in humanity with the rest of us.
It was too much to handle.
Suddenly, I wanted out, I wanted to be anywhere but there. I tried to tap on Mark, to get him to move or look up or just acknowledge that I was losing my mind within easy reach of him, but my body wouldn’t respond. I managed to flick my finger at his arm, bumping him a little, but he only rubbed a hand over it as if a bug had landed on him. Selene was talking about the new pokemon game, and Mark and Frank were just nerdy enough and broke enough to be enraptured by her descriptions. I was stuck in a state of eye contact with this thing, and the longer I looked, the more it seemed to drink me in with its strange eyes.
Then, without warning, it began to sink down into its seat, lost beneath its table.
I panicked. Suddenly not being able to see it was worse than having it on display. Could it slink beneath our table? How far could it go and how close could it get? I was suddenly imagining the damage those teeth could do to a foot, even a foot within a shoe, and pulled mine up a little higher as Selene’s word washed over me. He didn’t resurface for quite some time, and you would have said that a thing that size would not have gone unnoticed.
Then he slid back up from under the table on the opposite side of the booth.
He was grinning from ghastly ear to ear, and he looked like a little kid whose trying to play with the table behind them. There was still a table between us and him, but I was no longer sure how much protection that provided us. I didn’t know what his mental state was and whether he meant us harm or not, but when he dipped back down again, I began to shake.
“What is wrong with you?” Mark suddenly asked, turning to look at me as I shuddered beside him.
I pointed to the empty plate where the man had been sitting and Mark looked over before scoffing loudly.
“Oh no, your boyfriend left. Don’t worry, I’m sure most of those guys at the bar will take you home if you ask them nicely enough.”
“Whats going on?” Jim asked, noticing my discomfort and looking alarmed.
“He’s obsessed with the guy that was sitting a couple of tables back. Couldn’t take his eyes off him. I swear, I thought he was gonna try and console the guy for a minute. The dude was jut sitting there crying and this freak sits over here and,”
The bald and sweaty head began to surface behind Selene, and when I shouted for her to look out, the whole restaurant went dead silent.
Jim and Selene turned to look, but there was nothing behind them.
I’d had enough though. I pushed Mark and Frank out of the way, freeing myself from the booth as I went to check under the table behind us. He’d be crouching down there, grinning like the little goblin he was, but as I got down on my knees and looked beneath, I was greeted with nothing but an empty space.
The waitress asked me what I was looking for as I moved to look under his table as well, but by then I was already intent on leaving.
I got to my car, threw the keys in the ignition, and sped out as fast as I could.
Sitting at home now, I can’t get that image out of my head. My phone has been blowing up, and I know my friends are worried. I want to assure them that everythings okay, but I just can’t make sense of it. What was that thing, and why did it take such an interest in me? Is it dangerous? Did it follow me home?
Everytime I close my eyes, I see those repulsive needle-like teeth and those no-color slits staring back at me.
Everytime I close my eyes, I wonder if I will ever be able to see anything but that creature again.