No man's sky short range teleporter
NMSHelios
2019.06.07 19:28 optimus3097 NMSHelios
The Helion Trade Federation is an industrial supply collective in the No Man’s Sky Universe, XB1 Normal Mode
2018.12.22 20:49 NMScafe NMS_UN42
A true social government in No Man’s Sky (almost 5 years old!), we exist to support the entire player base of No Man's Sky. Hobbyist, Hard Core - PvP, RP, Co-op, Community - Civs, Factions, Hubs, , all player types are welcome. If you qualify by our short list to join, you're in. We support and promote everyone in the spirit of the game itself ...and we're here to stay.
2018.12.11 14:56 The_Godfather69 United Corporate Alliance
The United Corporate Alliance or UCA for short is an intergalactic chain of companies and independent tycoons working together towards mutual business goals to - promote cooperation, growth and trade throughout the No Man's Sky Universe.
2023.05.28 14:08 No_Eight Lifestyle of the Zonowōdjon
| She held her breath as the clinker nosed onto the island. It was barely more than the size of two houses, covered in tall grass and reeds, but she hadn’t set sights on it for its size. It was hard to tell, so far from the coast, but it did not appear to have the sloping beach of a sandbar island, and even seemed to drift gently with the wind, as would their ship if the oars were docked. If she was right, this was one of the wandering islands. Her grandmother had told stories to all the children of the village, of her own time on fishing voyages aboard the longboats, and of finding a wandering island herself. Assembled through the will of a powerful spirit, wandering islands were as much life as land, imparting some of the lost vigor of the first generation unto the soil and allowing it to again wander the lakes. To weather the night here may not seem practical, small as the wandering islands typically are. But the spirits of these islands are kindly if offered due respect, and always protect those who sleep on their backs. And to return to the village with such a story… when she too became an elder, she could regale the next generation with her own story, not just the one she carried from her grandmother. She teased the land with one foot, and finding it solid hauled herself over the strake and onto the land. It bobbed slightly as it took her weight, and she felt her heart soar as the remaining crew disembarked behind her. As some of their number began fetching the poles and reed mats that would make their lean-tos for the coming night, she watched one of the oarsmen reverently offer a prayer to the ship-shrine, before taking a pinch of sacred ash from the urn within. He took slow, measured steps to the center of the island, before beginning his observances to the spirit who would watch over them that night. She almost wished she could help, but this was his role, and a spirit prefers to commune with only one regardless. He scattered the ash into the grass of the island as he shook a small chime, two strings of small shells tied on both ends to a T-shaped stick, and filled the quiet air with a gentle percussion. She could not hear his prayers; they were silent after all. But she could witness his devotion in his bearing, and imagine the honor he felt at getting this chance. It felt strange to see the wild shrine rituals without a shrine, or even an urn, but in truth it would be impossible to erect a shrine here. The proper observances could not be carried out should the island drift and never again be found. To build a shrine, a promise to a spirit that could not be kept, would be a cruelty that the village would not be forgiven for. Perhaps they would instead leave some of the reeds they carried, shredding their mats the same way old thatch is returned to rot in the marshes, for even a spirit powerful enough to set an island adrift must respect the cycle of death and rebirth, and could make use of their gift. But for this night, they and the spirit would share a kinship, and they would depart on the morrow with a story and a blessing. The Zonowōdjon The Zonowōdjon (families of the lake, originally from family.lake-ɢᴇɴ), also known to call themselves simply the Wōdjon, live in the coastal forests and shallow hills along the shores of the southern Titonean lakes. They comprise a collection of small villages, most constructed within reach of waterways with access to the lakes, if not on their very shore. More than anything, the Zonowōdjon are united by their animistic practices and sense of shared identity through language, as well as their predisposition to fishing and wetlands forage over the paddy agriculture predominant elsewhere in Tritonea. Subsistence, Industry, and Lifestyle Agriculture practiced by Zonowōdjon is more akin to horticulture. Long domesticated crops of the region such as zizania have made their way into Zonowōdjon hands, but large dedicated irrigation systems are largely not in use. Opportunistic replanting of common forage goods is frequent, typically in gardens just outside the circle of houses. While a fair amount of village labor is tied up in the planting and tending of these gardens, they do not provide a majority of Zonowōdjon caloric intake. Rather, the quantities of vegetable matter their relatively small population sizes demand are served well by a mixture of forage and horticulture, the former seeing many villages built within reach of the freshwater marshes where their most harvested good, cattail, is found. Cattail is employed for a variety of purposes, both culinary and industrial. Young shoots and narrow leaves are consumed as vegetables, while the root is harvested seasonally, dried, and processed into flour. Tubers found in the root system are also consumed as a vegetable, as are the immature flower spikes. The bast fiber of the stem is processed for use in textiles, as are the leaf fibers, though the former are more productive and make up a greater share of Zonowōdjon textile goods. Lastly, the stems are harvested whole for the production of wicker, thatch roofing, and reed boats. Beyond cattail, Lotus is commonly foraged for use as a vegetable, particularly its root. Nuts, fruits, and herbs also comprise a major element of Zonowōdjon food culture, though many are sourced exclusively from forage. Wild alliums are the most prevalent aromatic the Zonowōdjon harvest, while cranberries are one or the more prevalent fruits, used both fresh and dried in cooking. Hemp, both foraged and gardened, serves as a secondary source of textile fiber, and its seeds are heavily employed in cooking. Oil is pressed from seeds and nuts, with pecan being the most common source, but is not produced in great quantities by the Zonowōdjon themselves, and some oil comes by trade with their more agriculturally developed neighbors. Lastly, mushrooming is a major tradition among Zonowōdjon, comprising a significant portion of their diet during seasons when mushroom forage is plentiful. Fishing The true backbone of Zonowōdjon subsistence is fishing. Fish, shellfish, and crustaceans are caught through a mixture of open-water net fishing, sunken basket traps, river and stream weirs, and manual forage for shellfish in shallower waters. Crayfish are one of the most common catches in the basket traps and are prized more as a delicacy than a staple food, while larger fish from open-water fishing comprise the bulk of seafood by weight, and enable villages closer to the lake shore to grow larger, and their descendants to found new villages more frequently. Both canoes and wading fishers deploy seine nets and cast nets. The development of more sophisticated nets, the need for more hands to operate them, and the weight of increased hauls have all driven the development of Zonowōdjon shipbuilding significantly. While traditional reed boats and birchbark canoes are still frequently employed, particularly in rivers and streams and for more coastal operations, open water fishing trips make use of larger and far more sophisticated sewn-plank longboats with proper oar locks. Even large villages may only have one or several such boats, and their construction and maintenance is a significant expenditure of labor and point of clan pride. Crews on these boats often leave their village for days at a time, camping on small islands or distant shores. The reed-mats used to construct their temporary lean-tos are carried on the ship itself, chosen for their low weight. These larger longboats typically manage drop nets, though they may also be used to deploy seine nets with the aid of smaller outriding canoes, as the longboats are better able to transport a large catch. Cuisine Zonowōdjon cuisine centers zizania, cattail flour, and fish as staples. A common preparation of fish involves slicing the fish crosswise and stewing in an aromatic and seasoned stock. Both the flavorful broth and the flesh of the fish are fully consumed, with the aid of a lumpy flatbread produced from cattail flour. A flat stone atop a stone tripod, constructed above a fire, is the main method for production of flatbreads. Fish may also be dry roasted whole or sliced, with seeds and herbs pressed into the flesh if it has been sliced first. When catches are in excess of what can be consumed, which is common for coastal villages with longboats, fish will be smoke-cured for preservation and hung in a store hut. Smoke cured fish may still be cooked in a broth as above, or eaten as is. Regardless, at family meals it is common for older family members to pick the flesh of the fish from the bone after cooking is done, and distribute it to those younger than them. Another common dish is zizania pilaf, cooked in a thinner stock than fish. This dish often includes dried fruits, nuts, root and vegetables, and sometimes smaller seafood like shellfish and crayfish, with what is included owing more to seasonality and availability of forage than strict recipe. One more dish of note is a vegetable fritter, formed with shredded leaf and vegetable matter, mixed thoroughly with cattail flour, water, and seasonings before being fried. As oil production is marginal in many Zonowōdjon villages, this forms a less frequent component of the diet, but as a result holds a certain prestige. Ceremonies such as weddings, feasts when hosting representatives of other villages, and spiritual observances and festivals are more likely to see production of fritters. Notably, a vegetable fritter is a common burnt offering at shrines due to its status as a festival food. Architecture Villages are typically constructed of permanent dwellings. All buildings are single-storey, and roofed with cattail thatch. Most buildings are single room, and constructed of wattle-and-daub between upright wooden posts, though additional standing posts may support the roof in a longhouse. The clan patriarch lives in a longhouse, which may also be used as a storehouse and hold clan shrines. Cookstoves and fires are typically built outside during fair seasons, shielded by low reed mat walls and thatch lean-tos, though they are often moved to interior firepits during cold weather. Flooring is predominantly woven reed mats, which are easily pulled back to expose bare soil should a fire be constructed inside. Some homes feature bunk beds constructed flush with the wall. A village never contains more than three clans, and most frequently consist of only one. Houses are generally communal sleeping spaces, so many villages contain few buildings, and some may be devoted entirely to stores. Houses are generally arrayed so that all doors face the center, which is a beaten earth area free of plants and used for celebrations and ceremonies, as well as being used daily for the practice of industry such as processing cattail and weaving. Doing daily labor indoors is frowned upon during fair weather. Tools The Zonowōdjon make use of knapped stone and jade tools, reed wicker baskets, hemp or cattail-fiber sacks and ropes, and primarily burn wood for fire. Western obsidian infrequently permeates Tritonia through trade, so many villages are able to make use of obsidian knives, and some use obsidian in jewelry as well. Shells and bone feature prominently in jewelry and ornamentation, and shells are also the primary material used for shrine chimes. Wood carvings are frequently used for ornamentation, particularly on shrines, and those chimes which are not shell are often carved wood. Wooden chimes that can create clear ringing tones are particularly prized, and make auspicious gifts to other villages. Stone-tipped spears are the most common weapons wielded by Zonowōdjon villagers, though clubs with a flat wooden handle and a setting of a fist-sized smooth stone are also common. Obsidian is rarely used in weaponry. Spirituality and Mythology The Father Moon is seen as the shepherd of souls and the patron of reincarnation. He is also the father of men and fish, and fish scales are said to shimmer like moonlight on the surface of water because of his blessing within them. Moonbeams contain souls of the deceased returning to the world both as spirits and to enter new flesh, and the Father Moon travels to the edge of the world every night to collect those souls that have traveled the dark rivers beneath the earth to reach him. The Mother Sun is seen as the patron of flowers and plants, particularly the cattail. Filled with both warmth and rage, she begat the first life in the world, but cares little for the cycle of souls overseen by the Father Moon after the two generations she directly birthed died or otherwise left the lakes. T’sawayda is a psychopomp and the mythological ancestor of the Zonowōdjon. They are depicted both as a giant man and an enormous fish, or with elements of both such as the head of a pike on the torso of a man. They are a member of the Zonowōdjon third gender, leaning to masculine expression, and are a member of the second generation of life. They are seen as the first of the second generation to climb from land to shore, and thus their descendents are all the Zonowōdjon. T’sawayda urged all their descendents to reap the Mother Sun’s bounty on land, but stay close to the shore to partake of the Father Moon’s bounty. T’sawayda is said to now make their home in the depths of the lake, with one door of their longhouse opening to the waters of the lake, and another to the bank of the dark rivers beneath the world. They find and guide lost souls, such as Zonowōdjon who die on the water and risk becoming demons, freeing them from their flesh and offering them hospitality before sending them on their voyage to reunite with the Father Moon. Zonowōdjon believe the world is full of spirits, souls without constraining flesh who embody much of the natural world or protect those within it. There are believed to be local spirits both of locations, such as hills, marshes, and groves, as well as spirits to things within, such as the spirit of fish in a given marsh, or the spirit of a particularly ancient tree. Further, all villages and even most permanent buildings have venerated tutelary spirits. Shrines The core of Zonowōdjon spiritual practice is composed of maintaining shrines and holding public festivals. Shrines are dedicated to a local or tutelary spirit, with the latter also often seen as an ancestral spirit from a member of the clan in that village. For those spirits within buildings, a shrine is a simple as a clay urn which bears a pictorial representation of the spirit, into which offerings are placed. For spirits of larger areas, a shrine is constructed, usually from wood, either sewn or assembled through joinery. These shrines contain the urn which venerates the spirit proper. Most shrine urns feature a lid, often a wicker lid which is replaced annually during the vernal festival observances. Shell chimes are often hung from the roof of freestanding shrines, should there be enough clearance, or from poles erected around the shrine or the boughs of nearby trees. Similar chimes are held and shaken by shrine tenders during their observances, whether or not a shrine itself bears standing chimes. Spirit urns often contain permanent offerings, with obsidian, bone, shell, and jade beads being common. Beads may initially be on a string, but the burning of offerings often leaves the beads free within the ash. During festivals and days of spiritual observance, offerings of food are placed within the urn. Offerings in distant shrines may be permitted to rot, but typically the offering is burned before being placed within the urn. Should an urn break, the shrine tender is expected to go into a period of grief and observance, and produce a replacement urn before interring the shards at the base of the shrine. Beads and other permanent offerings are transferred. With the small population of most villages, a single man may be expected to tend multiple shrines, but the most important shrines may have a single tender. The clan patriarch is seen as symbolically responsible for the shrine to their clan’s guardian spirit, and the patriarch leading an entire village for the village spirit’s shrine as well. Clinkers, the prized sewn-plank boats used for open-water fishing trips, hold a similar importance to homes, and thus contain a shrine. Typically the shrine is a small cavity constructed in the prow of the ship, containing a spirit urn. It is commonly believed that new ships are guarded by the returning spirit of an ancestor, so placing family ash or even bone shards within the shrine urn is often part of dedicating a new clinker.Souls are believed to descend to the world starting on the full moon, so dedications of new homes and boats are usually practiced on the night of the full moon, that the soul of an ancestor might find the shrine and become a guardian for the new structure. Creation All the world was one lake, stretching to the ends of the world, and no souls lived within it. Thus, the Mother Sun and the Father Moon came together to cast the first life to the earth. The first life was enormous, and as it died, the massive corpses divided the world into smaller lakes. The Mother Sun was grieved, but tried again. The next generation was composed of smaller beings, but the world was still unable to bear their weight. Most voluntarily climbed to the sky, becoming stars, though some today choose to return to a world that is too small for them, creating disasters that terrorize the third generation. The third generation was the last attempt, and still lives upon the world, birthed by the giants of the second generation before their exodus, but blessed with life by the sky. After so many generations, the seed of the Father Moon was spent, and he went dark for the first time. It is only when many of the third generation died their first death and returned to the edge of the world that the Father Moon gathered them back to himself, and once again began to shine. Thus, the Father Moon became a shepherd of souls, gaining and losing his light as the cycles of death and rebirth flow. The Afterlife & Funerary Practice The Zonowōdjon do not believe in an afterlife as such, but rather in the eventual return of souls, though some may claim the dark rivers of the underworld amount to some form of hell or purgatory. The Zonowōdjon believe that the soul resides in the bones, and is constrained by the flesh. The soul must sink into the Earth to travel the great rivers under the Earth to its edge, where it will be gently collected by the Moon after a long, dark voyage. Souls embraced by the moon are returned to the lakes in the form of gentle moonbeams, souls ready to find new life. Souls of animals likewise find themselves returned to the lakes by the Moon. A soul may become the new guardian spirit of a home or village, or find itself embodied in a new human life. Those souls who return as tutelary spirits are particularly venerated, and it is believed that important ancestors return to protect the homes, boats, and villages of their descendants. Conversely, a soul lost in the dark rivers who never returns to the moon may find itself twisted by the dark, and eventually claw its way up through the lakebeds as a demon. Demons may also spawn from a soul trapped in the darkness of its own dead flesh, a fate seen as especially common for those lost to the waters of the lake. Thus, prayers for the deliverance of the missing to the Father Moon are common. By far the most common funeral practice is cremation, as it is believed the soul cannot be liberated while flesh still encases bone. After a cremation, bones often remain. Many villages maintain ossuaries composed of shallow earthen mounds beyond the circle of homes in which bones are interred, sometimes alongside carvings, clothing, or even jewelry. Smaller villages without ossuary mounds have simpler burial grounds further outside of the village, with skulls alone being instead interred at the foundation of family dwellings. In both cases, carvings may be made on the forehead of an intact skull before burial, and a shrine urn decorated to match, in hopes that the soul of the deceased will return to grace the village as a tutelary spirit. Some ash from every burial is placed in the spirit urn of a family home, some in the village longhouse, and often distributed to important shrines of the region surrounding the village, with the latter being obligatory for those who served a particular spirit. Remaining ash is stored in a communal family urn, and on the construction of new homes, some ash from this urn is ritually placed in a small pot or basket which is buried at the foundation to consecrate the ground, and allow the descending spirits of ancestors to find and protect the site. Culture and Gender Zonowōdjon clan names are matrilineal, but the ruling structure of clans and villages is more patriarchal, with each clan having a patriarch who serves as both the face of the clan, and the arbiter of important decisions. However, there is a strong cultural importance put on the opinions of elderly women, who hold a similar social importance to clan patriarchs as the retainers of oral history. They wield de facto authority in villages, especially those containing multiple clans. Most villages contain 1-3 clans, with one clan’s patriarch holding primary authority, extending from their role as the face of the village when meeting with outsiders or people from other villages. Gender roles are not particularly strict among younger individuals, especially the unmarried, with only clan patriarchs and village elders taking on especially gendered roles. Both men and women participate in fishing and forage, as well as cooking and food processing and preservation. Older women tend to perform most weaving, as it is a position of some prestige that does not require them to leave the village. A major exception is during mushrooming seasons, when elderly women are trusted to identify safe forage, and often leave the village alongside the typical younger foragers. The main gender differences observed are that it is seen as a more womanly role to plant and tend a garden, while it is seen as a more manly role to perform observances and burn offerings at a shrine (though at major ceremonies, it is still elderly woman who recount myths and tales for those in attendance, while a man performs the actual shrine observances). Zonowōdjon culture also observes a third gender, though it is mutable and can express as leaning to either male or female gendered expression based on the individual. The Zonowōdjon believe the third gender to be an expression of the returned soul of another life in a differently sexed body. Visibly intersex children are always identified as belonging to this gender, but individuals who are not visibly intersex may also find themselves identified through other means. Commonly, showing early aptitude with reading the stars is seen as a sign that a child is of the third gender, as is a child showing both interest and aptitude in the weaving usually practiced by elderly woman. Regardless of birth sex, members of the third gender identified in this way tend to lean to some feminine aspects and gain some of the prestige granted elderly women, while those identified by their intersex characteristics tend to lean masculine. Members of this third gender are respected, but not particularly venerated. A member of the third gender can be a shrine tender, just as a man might, and participate in any labor, but are usually seen as beyond the institution of marriage and thus live their lives unmarried. Festivals There are several seasonal festivals observed by the Zonowōdjon, though precise timing varies heavily from village to village, with each usually choosing a phase of the moon, timed from the start of a season, to begin and end observances. Most festivals are multi-day affairs, With each day being dedicated to the observance of one particular god or heroic ancestor. Typically only one day features a full feast, and while spiritual observance happen on every day, the last day of a festival week usually sees a large communal observance. For multiple festivals, the decoration of the village is an important observance. Slender cloth drapes hung from the roofs of buildings and the boughs of trees mark the largest vernal festival, while wreaths of zizania stalks and cattail reeds hung on walls and poles mark the autumnal zizania festival. Some festivals call for decorations to be placed on poles erected in the common areas. While for some villages these poles are a temporary fixture, in other towns they remain year-round, but only feature their festival decorations during the week of observance and otherwise remain bare. A major feature of several festivals, including the zizania festival in autumn, is circumambulation around a temporary shrine or ritual fetish constructed in a village center. Though circumambulation is practiced elsewhere in Zonowōdjon spirituality, here it persists for as long as two hours, described as beginning as the sun sets and ending when the moon is fully ascended to the sky.In addition to festivals, many clans have other non-festival observances. It is a common practice for most families to forgo the eating of fish on the new moon, and to fast during the daylight hours of both half-moons. Techs Key: Main: Minor: - Fishing Trap: Sunken Basket
- Hand Fishing Net: Cast Net
- Hand Fishing Net: Seine Net
- Oar Locks
- Smoke Curing
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2023.05.28 14:04 PumpkinPatchHoss Will a semi truck stock 12v cb power supply be enough for a Stryker 955?
I have a semi truck, currently have a peaked and tuned cobra I got a CB shop along my travels. I want t someday get a Stryker 955 because I really enjoy using the CB radio, and heard the Stryker has great power. I would upgrade my antennas as well if I get this radio. I currently run 2, 4ft firestik 2's. I am really a noob at CB's, but its been so much fun.
I also run the factory coax in the truck currently. It is a company truck, so I don't want to do too much with it. It is a 2022 Kenworth, and honestly have had no issues so far with factory coax. I get about 1 - 1.2 SWR currently, and great clarity and range.
Sidenote, am I crazy or does the CB range INCREASE during a very overcast day? I was out in New Mexico and it was very cloudy. I swear the range was so much further with clouds than with clear skies. It really is pretty nutty how out west you can really go miles and miles with this thing.
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2023.05.28 14:02 adolfgandhi007 Exploring the Complexities: Dating/Marrying Someone with Differing Political Views - A Delicate Balancing Act [A very serious discussion held by serious independent 69 body count and plus going females of twoxindia]
In the vast realm of relationships, where love and politics intertwine, lies an intriguing question that continues to stir debates within the diverse feminist strong independent community of
TwoXIndia. Recently, a thought-provoking discussion (this happens once in a blue moon) emerged on the subreddit, with participants delving into the potential challenges faced when considering a partner with different political views. As we ventured into this landscape of contrasting ideologies, we discovered a tapestry of perspectives, ranging from the conventional to the unconventional, and everything in between.
Amidst the chorus of popular sentiment which I'll talk about larer, a solitary voice emerged, challenging the status quo that the feminaz-...I mean the feminists have set on that sub. One woman, whom I'll preferr to remain anonymous(being one of few who actually doesn't seem to understand that in her bouts of innocence someone had led her to a Mental Asylum where broken and traumised girls, after taking wrong decisions propagate the same bullshit to other girls who may be feminine and conservative and not a cumdumpster like them out of their own choice), bravely shared her perspective: 'I believe that love should transcend political boundaries. It's an opportunity for growth, a chance to learn from each other's differing viewpoints.' While this beautiful notion invited intrigue from my psyche, it raised It's It's laughable how these women believe they can salvage a relationship with someone so intellectually inferior. Perhaps it's time for them to wake up and realize that love alone cannot bridge the gap between reason and ignorance a relationship with someone so intellectually inferior. Perhaps it's time for them to wake up and realize that love alone cannot bridge the gap between reason and ignorance can truly stand the test of time while being packed in suitcases and fridges willingly despite evidences telling not to do it, because...#letsspreadpiss🕊
After reading that beautiful comment every other served as a stark departure from what I had thought would be prevailing sentiment, because again they seriously had a decent discussion with atleast an iota of common sense after time immemorial. One user, whom I shall like to keep anonymous(honeslty we still have many simps among us boys who'd still use this post to score brownie points with people like her...but dude forget the streets she's the kind of person whod even taint a shitting ground), boldly proclaimed that political differences were an insurmountable barrier, asserting, 'Why would I waste my time with someone who doesn't share my values? It's like inviting chaos and conflict into my life.' This assertion of unwavering loyalty to personal beliefs, devoid of any consideration for compromise or growth, left many readers questioning the inflexibility of such a stance. Almost felt like...I was watching the speech of a failed painter from Austria who started a cleaning business later.
Another woman, let's call her Maya (because thats what I think she was birthed out of, no human parents could give birth to a child who acts autistic willingly, suffers from schizophrenia born out of her narcissism and should honeslty become the single independent feminist lady with kitty kids to give her life a meaning, which is nothing short of a nymphomania 101), asserted that differing political views were indicative of a fundamental character flaw. She argued, 'How can I trust someone who aligns with ideologies that directly contradict my core values? It's a recipe for heartbreak and disappointment.' While her viewpoint emanates from a place of self-preservation (according to intellectual single moms of that sub), some readers found her judgment to be overly rigid, but they were men so it was mandatory for mods to shut the door on the potential for constructive dialogue or understanding (nothing new).
As the conversation unfolded, there were instances where women expressed a dismissive attitude towards partners with contrasting political views. One individual, whose identity again anonymous (because she's a shit), casually remarked, 'Why would I subject myself to the torment of constantly disagreeing with someone who just doesn't get it? Life's too short for that.' This unyielding rejection of differing perspectives left a bitter taste in the mouths of those seeking the possibility of unity amidst diversity, who were again men, and I think after that simply all men were kicked out so that talk about equal representation in politics could be carried out in whole of it's glory.
It wasn't as if rational comments weren't being said, but it was not fun to find meaningful comments in the minuses, and then finding them bombarded with plethora of vitriol that these girls who are bound to end up on streets have for the ones who are liberal but not savage and barbaric enough to proclaim their independence and strength by riding whatever d!ck that they find hot .
It's laughable how these women believe they can salvage a relationship with someone so intellectually inferior. Perhaps it's time for them to wake up and realize that love alone cannot bridge the gap between reason and ignorance These women who choose to associate with partners of differing political views are willingly subjecting themselves to emotional turmoil. It's like willingly walking into a minefield of discord and tension These women may think they are advocating for open-mindedness and acceptance, but they are inadvertently contributing to the erosion of their own values. By compromising on such a fundamental aspect of their lives, they are sacrificing the very essence of what they claim to stand for And others were much more salty. So salty that to get rid of their anger and prove their version of feminine strength, they'll had to raise their body count by 30 or 40 plus. Maybe, just maybe, that'll make them cool down for 5 minutes when they have another rendezvous with people from opposing views.
As I bid by goodbye to the exploration of that mental Asylum chat group masquerading as a subbreddit, I was left with questions about complexities surrounding dating and marrying someone with differing political views as a male, what if the virus created by them has left that echo chamber and ignited passionate debates and sparks of contention within the actual diverse community Indian females, a good chunk of whom aren't cumdumpsters masquerading as females. Would voices of deplorable and dimwitted dissent clash with those actually seeking unity i.e us men, and would the rift widen as the whorish ideologies begun to spread by those low IQ zombies of that sub. Amidst the cacophony of contrasting perspectives, it becomes evident that no easy resolution exists other than becoming rich and marrying a young one while she still has her purity intact. The issue would always remain fraught with emotion, leaving behind a lingering unease and a nagging sense of division because of one side's ability to let go of the victim card now that things have really been equalized and remove the filter of shit that's blinding them to see the cries we cry, the fear we posses, the trauma we recieve because if them as they always have a justification and army of simp boys to massage their ego. Only time will tell if love can truly transcend the boundaries of politics while such a subreddit exists and the chasm between ideologies will continue to widen, casting a shadow over the pursuit of meaningful connections.
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2023.05.28 13:58 IrreliventPerogi GotM - A First Time Reader's Experience, Thoughts, and Predictions - Book 6: The City of Blue Fire Pt. 1
Book 6: The City of Blue Fire
So the final buildup to the climax begins! We seem to be more solidly in the payoff section of the novel, with only a few revelations and theories this time around. Additionally, most of the cast we follow seem to be hitting their point of no return, we're on this roller-coaster and cant get off until it stops. That the dread didn't set in until it began clicking its way to the top is more your fault. The title is plenty evocative too, and if I had to guess, we'll be seeing more of the Darujhistan cast this time around.
Epigraph
Another issue of Rumor Born that seems to be recapping the events of the last few books in Darujhistan. What's interesting is it's final mention of the fête to end off.
For fun:
First came the Eel "or not one but a thousand" Is that literal, or merely a reference to their reach? I'll speak more to the Eel during the chapter breakdown below. What's also interesting is that the poem mentions they came "under a jagged moon that might be dead" We see from this that Rumor Born or Fisher in general is not authoritative. The work is literally recounting what rumors there are on the street, and whether or not there's anyone left living in Moon's Spawn is one of those. What this seems to indicate is that the Eel's influence couldn't be popularly felt until after Rake arrived.
"a claw scraped slow//on the city's cobbles" Kalam mistaken for a Claw (easy mistake) Rake is the "dragon... seen sailing high silver and black in the night sky" descending onto Pearl, who gave out the "demon's death cry"
The Tiste Andii were responsible for when "a master's hundred hands lost//a hundred daggers to the dark"
Which are all things that have happened in the past, the fête, ominously, has yet to occur, yet its mere invitation is counted among these City shaking events.
Chapter 17
Book 6's introduction. Overall, there isn't yet much to differentiate this from Book 5 other than setting, but we'll see how that develops. So without further ado...
Epigraph
The Chapter Itself -
- begins following Rallick Nom into the Phoenix Inn. Before entering, he is stopped by Meese who, after flirting with RN, for a moment, warns the assassin of someone asking after him. Someone who knew to sit at Kruppe's table, no less. He enters and notes, amused, for the first time how crowds part before him. He sits down, and the man (whom we are later told is Circle Breaker) warns him, on behalf of the Eel, of a contract sealed by Councilman Turban Orr with the Assassins' Guild against Lord Coll. The Assassin, Ocelot, merely waits for the Lord to return to the city. The Eel also applauds RN and Murillio's attempts to avenge Coll, and offers any assistance they would require. Rallick turns him down, and thanks him for the warning, after a quick drink with Iralta and Meese, he leaves the Inn to act on the information.
So, I had considered bringing this up before, but was on shakier ground then specualtion-wise. But now, its Speculation Time. Kruppe is the Eel, in my mind. We find out latter that Meese and Iralta are also in on the whole thing, so that's already ties to the Phoenix Inn. Kruppe obviously has no fear that the Eel would contradict him when lying to Baruk, and is able to mimic the Eel's method of cryptic hints perfectly. It fits his style of appearing far less than he is, in this case, he's a masquerading as a political lackey. Both the Eel and Kruppe were able to find out about the scheme against Coll without any slip-ups on the part of our conspirators. I believe this to be because of the poisoned bolt. Turban Orr was investigating it, and only someone who knew Rallick's MO could trace that back to him, and only someone who knew Rallick personally could understand that the bolt was initially meant for Lady Simtal rather than Councilman Lim. After all, the death of Orr's majority is too convenient to assume anything besides a political motive. The Eel heard wind of investigations regarding a poisoned bolt, and understood that his friend was behind it and why.* There were other things that had tipped me off, but those were the big ones that I can remember at present.
*Additionally, given that both Baruk and Crone felt Oppon's interference, and the uncharachteristic nature of the plan, it is highly probable that Kruppe felt the interference as well and later recognized what that interference was, hence his coy hint last chapter.
Baruk, meanwhile, is sulking alongside Anomander Rake, wondering why the Tiste Andii would ever allow the Imass and the Adjunct into the barrow. The tension between the two grows, as their diametrically opposed views on the world continue to breakdown communication and raise conflict between the two. In conflict, the Lord of Moon's Spawn excels. He explains to the High Alchemist that Laseen will have her fight, and capture Darujhistan whole if at all possible. Eliminating the Jaghut Tyrant and Rake are merely two additional tasks to maintain the long-term sustainability of the Empire. Rake hasn't nuked the city and left, because he wants to beat Laseen directly, a total victory where she losses what she desires without the world losing it as well. Baruk notes that Anomander Rake could always betray Darujhistan, but Rake notes that becoming himself a traitor would legitimize any treason against him. He even notes several individual who could defeat him under certain circumstances.
Baruk uses Rake's "Son of Darkness" moniker, and Rake rejects it as a title used by those who would worship him. Interesting. Being the child of a god would net you that, I suppose. He maintains the honest (if brutal) route in life not out of fear but duty. Duty to the ever-dwindling population of Tiste Andii, who merely run down the clocks of their lives dispassionately, obeying orders yes, but merely as a function of enduring their existence. He could run and hide, saving his people's lives, but they would be living in body only, so he follows cause after cause, attempting to revive their spirits. (Also of note, he mentioned that the Tiste Andi live roughly 20 thousand years, so I'm not sure where I'd gotten my deep time understanding of them, unless Rake's lifespan is extended the same relative amount as a human mage's would be)
Baruk is unsure how to respond, the plight of the Tiste is so incomprehensible that he can only muster the most abstract pity. So he returns the conversation to the Jaghut Tyrant. Will Rake be able to defeat it? Who knows, but killing him would render the Tyrant greatly reduced, possibly even to a level where the Cabal can eliminate him. Alternatively, killing the Tyrant would reduce AR, so that the Malazans may someday eliminate him. Two birds, one and a half stones. It is the Cabal that scares the Empress, an unknown, which is why our malazans seek out Vorcan. Beyond this, Oppon's meddling continually draws attention from the gods of the world, interested to see if immoral blood would be spilled. This began with Rake's killing of the two Hounds.
They finish the conversation by assessing the condition of Mammot, trapped in a slumber, his mind/soul stuck in his D'riss warren, rulled by the Worm of Autumn, D'rek, of whom Mammot is a High Preist. D'riss is evidently the Warren of earth magic, so I wonder if Caladan Brood will have or has had any interactions with the scholar. Mammot went off to investigate the barrow at Baruk's request, and wound up in this state. All of the Elder magic and Otataral present have messed with him somehow, and he cannot be freed until the Jaghut is. In which case, there will be a narrow window to save him before the High Preist, and his goddess, are subsumed by the Tyrant.
Crokus and Apsalar return to Darujhistan, despite wanting to be rid of the woman as soon as possible, Crokus is disappointed when the City does not impress her. They enter Mammot's study, finding a mess rather than the man himself. When wondering whether Rallick would know anything of this, Apsalar reacts strongly, likely prompted by her time under the Rope. For the first time since Book 2, we enter the PoV of Circle Breaker. After receiving a sign from an old woman, he delivers an additional sign to Meese. Internally, however, he cannot help but assume his days are numbered. He's acting in public, and how long until Turban Orr adds together that the same guard present at all of his leaked meetings is himself a mole? He expects to die soon, but is resolved to maintain his course until the last, heading for one final contact he considers redundant. Meese acts on the signal, approaching the building Mammot stays in, and knocking on the door. Crokus answers, disappointed that she is not his Uncle, and confused as to why she would be there. Crokus catches her up with Aps' amnesia, and notes they have not spoken to anyone but one stabler. Meese informs them of the death of the guard at the D'Arle estate, and Crokus takes this to be a betrayal on Chalice's part. That's... not a betrayal buddy. Aps' mention of Chalice clues Meese in on the situation surrounding the death, and despite the boy's protestations, she takes the situation at face value.
As they prepare to leave, Serrat stalks them, resolving to kill another watcher in the shadows, (I assume Irilta, given that she's backup) and replace her. She's been hunting the Coin Bearer on Rake's orders and we learn that she was one of the individuals hunting Crokus along the rooftops in Ch. 5. There's not much more to this scene, other than a couple odd details I'll note.
Kruppe and Murillio reach the Phoenix Inn, not finding their friends. Kruppe strangely waves aside the news of Rallick Nom meeting someone here earlier, and instead of reporting to Baruk right away, instead opts to enjoy a tankard of beer. This, coincidently opens a window for Circle Breaker to approach him with a message.
Rallick Nom, meanwhile, prepares to take on Ocelot. The clan leader will have all the advantages, and RN will have one shot at best, assuming he can even find him and get close enough. He does, however, posses an anti-magic powder (supplied by Baruk) which could potentially even the battle field. Moments after recalling the warning from the High Alchemist against applying it to bare skin, Rallick, knowing his chances are slim, fearing that Coll's death would remove the last claim on humanity he has left, he rubs the dust into his bare skin, all over. What sort of changes will this effect onto our assassin? Who knows! The chapter ends with RN swearing he will find and kill Ocelot undetected.
And there we go! Book 6 is starting off with a banger, once again tying ever more threads together tighter and tighter, promising one heck of a payoff. I, for one, cannot wait to see how it all unfolds!
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2023.05.28 13:58 temptationaus UFC Fight Night: Kara-France vs Albazi (Provide Picks Full Card Breakdown) [+92 Units in 18 months]
2023 Results (So Far): +18.78 Units
2022 Results: +73.185 Units
All Time: +92 Units
Full transparency, I run a MMA betting service called Provide Picks. We have been operating for roughly a year and a half completely tracked and verifiable with a return of over 96 units in that short time. You can find our full tracking sheet history
here and you can also see a bunch of customer testimonials and betting slips throughout that time
here.
Me myself, I have watched MMA religiously for more than 10 years and trained for over 4.5 years, I love this sport so I figured why not help bring some insight and analysis to others! Now this isn’t a sales pitch, I know how Reddit works and I really enjoy the opinions shared on this sub-reddit so I genuinely want to help contribute and if you enjoy the output, please feel free to join the team! We are proven to be profitable long-term so if you have some spare change to invest at any level, you love the sport and are interested in improving your knowledge - come over and check us out at
providepicks.com. As we have a fair base of paying members, it wouldn’t be fair to them to share every single one of our bets however I want to provide as much value for this betting community as people, hopefully to help you guys see a different angle in terms of MMA betting and long-term profitability and more importantly - sending these bookies broke.
Anyways enough waffle - let’s get into this week’s shenanigans. This is a surprisingly fun fight night card, I love these events that are lower on name value but just full of decent talent and exciting matchups. This is definitely one of them and generally when you have slightly lesser talent stacked fight nights, you have a night full of violence and finishes - let’s see if that continues in this one. Onto the breakdowns!
Maxim Grishin (32-9-2) vs. Philipe Lins (16-5): Grishin is a tall, orthodox fighter who is just a real good mixed martial artist. He is a big frame for the LHW division, is strong and still has fairly slow, plodding style of movement and footwork. Is good in the clinch, very good at holding position by winning underhooks and using his big head to frame against the neck of his opponent and keep them in position for taxing knees to the body and just wearing on them with his big frame. I like his ability to keep the fight in his range, using slight forward pressure and a decent feint game to his advantage. Can be a little heavy set on the lead leg so should look out for the speedy outside leg kick of Lins in this one - Grishin is also pretty handy at catching the body kick and punishing. Personally, never been massively high on Lins in his career, admittedly he has looked better since dropping to his proper weight class post juice cycle but it is against weak competition. He is OK everywhere but not great anywhere, I do like his hand-speed with his boxing combos especially when pressuring forward. I think he mixes in takedowns well in his game at times but he can also be held against the cage. I probably slightly edge Lins in terms of cardio but I also do think this is a massive watch the scales fight due to Grishin’s size and propensity for bad weight cuts. This is a tough fight to call given both guys are fairly unimpressive. I favour the speed of Lins with the hand-speed and kicks definitely but he doesn’t set them up intelligently. I think Grishin can hold Lins against the cage, wear on him with his size and win minutes. I capped this fight 50/50 and I think we see a close fight, will take
Maxim Grishin by UD but with very low confidence.
BET: No bet.
Luan Lacerda (12-2) vs. Da'Mon Blackshear (12-5-1): I like what I saw on debut from Lacerda - he has a very Muay Thai style of fighting, very flat-footed with a high guard, move forward pressuring with the lead leg ready to pop up and check kicks quickly. He has sharp, fast hands and particularly his hooks to the body are very technically sound. Against Stamann he was able to mix some grappling in when it suited but it is clear he is more of an Aldo style fighter that prefers to stuff takedowns and keep it on the feet. Coming up against Blackshear here who I have been very impressed with even though he is off 2 losses. Da’mon is a super well rounded guy, I like his creative offence on the feet and I also like his offensive grappling ability on the ground too. Defensively, he leave a little more to be desired and can be a little comfortable with fighting off his back which I don’t particularly like. We haven’t seen too much grappling from Lacerda so will be interested to see how he fares in this one but I think the technicality of Lacerda on the feet, the ability to mix his targets to the head, body and legs and just land the more damaging strikes will edge him this one. Taking
Luan Lacerda by UD. BET: No bet.
Jinh Yu Frey (11-8) vs. Elise Reed (6-3): I would be doing a disservice to everyone who reads this if I honestly told you with any level of confidence that you should put your hard earned money anywhere near this fight. Don’t, simple as that.
Daniel Santos (10-2) vs. Johnny Munoz Jr. (12-2): This is a super fun matchup between two very efficient grapplers which should make for a exciting scrap here. Let’s start with Daniel Santos, if you knew nothing of this guy and watched him fight and had half a clue on MMA, you would know immediately that he is a Chute Boxe fighter. He has relentless forward pressure, irresponsible boxing defence and is a very kill or be killed style fighter. I like his stalking style, but he has little head movement besides the pull counter really, likes to pressure you until that back foot is up against the cage and then explode in with spinning attacks or elbows from weird angles. He keeps his hands high but then head on centre line and thus far has shown some crazy durability but this can only get you so far. Looks to have solid grappling, not accepting bottom position and constantly looking to invert and throw up submissions. Against Arce he looked good however Arce was able to be elusive with his footwork, stick and move and use angles well to counter in and out of range. I think against anyone who can effectively stay on the outside and use smart, straight shots effectively, he will struggle. I just don’t think that guy is Munoz JR on the feet - he is clunky, doesn’t throw in combinations and looks to parry alot of shots defensively which I really don’t like against a guy who throws wild, unorthodox strikes in Santos. He is a solid wrestler with some good offensive TD numbers but he has to be careful not to shoot unintelligently and throw himself into a submission which will make him hesitant and have to strike. I think Munoz’s wins have been against low level guys who aren’t in the promotion anymore and I think this is a bad stylistic fight for him. I think Santos will land the more damaging shots and I fancy he gets him out of here in under 2 rounds. Taking
Daniel Santos via TKO RD 1. BET: Like the look of the Santos moneyline, fancy Santos Inside the Distance too but will wait to see what price this opens at. If we get anything in the realm of +125 to -120, I would look at a 1.5 unit play. Under 2.5 rounds is an option also depending on price, I think it will probably be around the -200 to -250 play so anything south of that will be a play too.
Andrei Arlovski (34-21) vs. Don'Tale Mayes (9-5): Huge experience edge to the old-dawg here in Arlovski. Mayes has been everything but impressive thus far in his UFC career and I don’t know how you could be intrigued to play either side in this one. Mayes can hit hard and is reasonably athletic for the HW division but skill for skill outside the boxing, he doesn’t offer a lot. I couldn’t be confident on ever betting him to be quite honest. You know what you’re going to get with Arlovski and that is volume, if his chin can handle what is coming back at him. He is a special for split decisions so if you’re a degen and want action, look to that but for me, no interest here. Will take the side of
Andrei Arlovksi via UD using his volume and experience but you couldn’t be more lower confidence.
John Castañeda (19-6) vs. Muin Gafurov (18-4) : Gafurov taking this on short-notice with Castaneda set to take on Mendonca before that was cancelled and replaced with possibly the furthest opposite style of fighter. The Gafurov gameplan is simple, contest on the feet, use blitz attacks such as looping overhands when moving forward followed by a double leg against the cage and rely on his Sambo capabilities to hold top position and out-work his opponent. Castañeda is a guy that doesnt get a huge amount of spotlight but I like his game alot. He has nice footwork, good striking out of southpaw and orthodox, has good wrestling entries and is able to grapple competitively, just a solid all around mixed martial artist. In this one, I really favour the movement and footwork of Castañeda and I think the speed is going to give Gafurov issues. Castañeda is sitting at a 60% TD Defence rate which is concerning against a guy who will consistently shoot like Gafurov, but I think Castañeda will be hard to find, using the angles in and out of the pocket and throwing quick shots up the middle to dissuade and make Gafurov think. I like
John Sexi Mexi Castañeda to win this one by UD. BET: No lines opened yet but have capped Castañeda as a 60% winning chance.
Elizeu Zaleski (23-7) vs. Abubakar Nurmagomedov (17-3-1): Zaleski is an interesting fighter to me. Good sprawl, solid TD Def against the cage, good balance and strength to win underhooks. Quite a flat-footed striker, not a massive amount of footwork but I like his rear leg power kick, he hits the body well and switches levels nicely. Relatively low volume and works single shots mainly without a massive amount of feinting. The frequency that he fights worries me but it has been the story of his career. Abubakr is the typical Dagestani fighter, limited stand up basically a quick overhand right and other single shots, tied in with a grinding, gruelling wrestling pace. He seems on the lower end of the Nurmagomedov scale in terms of skill, often leaving himself open to submission when in top control whether it’s knee-bars or even the common triangle. He is able to hold a good pace over 15 mins which is good given how top heavy and smothering he can be at times. He fights out of both stances, looks more comfortable out of OD but if he fights SP, I think he will lose this fight. Zaleski is too sharp on the feet especially with the body kicks and straight shots which will only be accentuated in the opposite stances. I also think the knees for Zaleski are going to be huge here, he throws them with bad intentions in the centre and against the cage which tied in with his teeps and front kicks are a dangerous sight for Abubakr. Abubakr is a good chance at smothering the fire power of Zaleski and just wearing on him but I think he is dangerous enough off his back to survive and challenge at times and I expect the damage will start to add up on the Zaleski side and I think we see a finish. Taking
Elizeu Zaleski via TKO RD 2. BET: Zaleksi ITD will be a play if over +200. Moneyline odds are probably bang on.
Guram Kutateladze (12-3) vs. Jamie Mullarkey (16-5): Guram has a K1 kickboxing background and it shows, very high level on the feet with good head movement and sharp, unpredictable strikes set up with a smart feint game. He has really good distance management, uses great fundamentals and is super quick with his hand-speed and he finishes combos with kicks which I love, its that kickboxing mentality. He fights out of All Stars which shows in his TD Defence especially against the fence, he is clearly strong but has very good wrestling and counter wrestling technique. He has had a super high level of competition and performed very well in wins and losses, we just don’t see him active enough due to injuries and bad luck. Mullarkey is an absolute junkyard dog, pushing the pace and moving forward with intense pressure making you fight every second of that 15 minutes. He like to engage in the pocket, for better or worse, and in recent times we have seen his wrestling really shine through some of these tough scraps. He has a nice jab which I expect to be pumping prior to every combo and entry for Mullarkey. I just think at this point in his career this is quite a tough fight for Mullarkey. Guram is a super high-level striker with a good base for stuffing takedowns and keeping the fight in kickboxing range. I expect Mullarkey to want to close distance and engage, I just don’t think defensively he is strong enough to absorb and adapt to the speed and combinations of Guram and I think we see that chin tested for Mullarkey. I think this is a bit of a step down in competition for Guram although if Mullarkey can get some early takedowns it will be interesting to see the gastank of Guram tested. The activity is always a question mark but at this point I think Guram should win this handily, will be taking
Guram Kutateladze via TKO RD 2. BET: Wouldn’t touch Guram at -350 but he should win.
Karine Silva (15-4) vs. Ketlen Souza (13-3): Silva should win here but at that price, even blind Freddie could see that this is a pass on the moneylines. Silva actually has a high finishing ability in terms of WMMA, so if we can get a good price on a fight doesnt go the distance line, that could be an option here.
BET: Wait for round lines to drop.
Tim Elliott (18-12-1) vs. Victor Altamirano (12-2): Altamirano is a SP fighter, fairly unusual style of striking with sort of a Tony Ferguson style mixed in with some well timed takedown attempts. He has very little power in his strikes but OK volume. Defensively, he leaves a lot to be desired with a modified sort of philly shell style where his lead hand is low and near the hip, he does get hit and often but he has shown very good durability. His takedowns worry me at times because he is very content to dip his head to an advancing opponent and run a double or single leg, he is very open to knees and front kicks up the middle. Tim Elliott lives up to his nickname of “Awkward” extremely well. He has bizarre head movement, footwork and feints that all tie in to his sort of herky jerky style of fighting. He is able to tie his wrestling game in very well, I’d say technically he is far more technically sound than Victor. He does put himself into submission opportunities with some of his entries but im not too worried about that in this fight. This has the potential to be one of the worst fights we have seen TBH and only because of how weird and unorthodox these guys are, the awkwardness really has the potential to make this fight a strange one. I am pretty confident that Tim has the grappling/wrestling edge and also the more diverse and comfortable striker, the recent occurrence with Tim and Gina Mazany in the media does give me pause that he might be coming into this too emotional but I think it may fire him up to really perform. I think Tim is under his value here and can win in a multitude of ways, going to take
Tim Elliott via UD. BET: Tim Elliott Moneyline -175 (2 Units to win 1.14 Units) Jim Miller (35-17) vs. Jared Gordon (19-6): I will keep this one short and simple, Gordon is a really bad stylistic matchup for Miller and would win probably 7/10 times currently BUT he is returning way too soon after getting KO’d by that headbutt from Bobby Green. Gordon has good wrestling and generally good durability with a knack for pushing these grinding paces and outworking and outlasting his opponent. Pair that up with good submission defence and thats a horror fight for A10 Miller. But you can never count Jim out, he hits hard for a vet, he is unorthodox and he has the potential to catch you. For me, Gordon should roll here but I love to play Jim Miller round one given that is his money round - have cashed plenty on this through his career! Short breakdown and not a thorough one, I think Jared Gordon should win this fight but I think it is too soon. I will take
Jared Gordon via UD**,** but take it with a pinch of salt.
BET: Jim Miller wins round 1 (price not available yet, .75 units) Alex Caceres (20-13) vs. Daniel Pineda (28-14): Haven’t had time to break this one down yet but will update if any bets come off it!
Kai Kara-France (24-10) vs. Amir Albazi (16-1): KKF is a kickboxing fighter who we have seen develop nicely through his career in the UFC. He has worked tirelessly on his takedown defence and it shows in his huge improvement in ability to not only stuff shots but his ability to use the cage and his excellent balance to keep his feet underneath him. I think KKF’s hands are still fairly rudimentary and not necessarily in a bad way, he uses the jab decently well and relies on the 1,2 sometimes too much. For his weight, he has good power and one area I really like are his leg kicks, he has solid rear leg power kicks that he lands very efficiently off the back of his straight shots. Albazi is more of a grappler in nature with a majority of his victories by submission but I have liked what I have seen from him on the feet also. He has a sharp, snappy jab which he works off the back of and allows to dictate the fight. He has a pretty limited kicking game and in terms of kick defence, I expect KKF to really try and exploit the lack of checking and the heavy set stature of Albazi. In the grappling realm, I don’t think it’s close. Albazi has some elite scrambles on the mat and if you’re content to sit in his guard, he has some really damaging ground and pound in which he will equally target your head and body and punish you and wear on you. Albazi is far superior in terms of grappling but the question is will he be able to get it down to the mat? I think his timing going under the big right hand will be an option and I think he will be able to use his strength advantage when in close to muscle certain movements. This is a big step up in competition and his first venture into main event rounds which is a worry. This is going to be a fun fight and I am really looking forward to it but I think as long as everything looks good after weigh-ins, I will be on the Albazi side. He is improving with every fight and I think we see him get this fight to the ground and wear on KKF, eventually finding a submission, probably a RNC. Taking
Amir Albazi via SUB RD 3. BET: Will wait to see what round lines are set at. Will be looking at the Albazi Inside the Distance line also.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- And that wraps up the breakdowns for this week! We send our followers the full betting cards on Saturday morning here in Australia, post weigh-ins. Nothing worse than betting on a fighter pre weigh-in, just to see him look like complete shit on the scales. We will post some of our betting card here incase anyone is interested!
Good luck, always gamble responsibly and remember to hang around long-term because there will be ups and downs but trust the process and we will build some bankroll. Would love to know if you agree or disagree anywhere and let us know who you are riding with below. Enjoy the fights! - Dylan.
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2023.05.28 13:57 Colt_Leasure The family next door disappeared. The answer to their vanishing is in the woods.
1
I live in a suburb surrounded by forest. My house is in a row of other properties built next to a tree line. The neighborhood was always quiet. The sounds of crickets, birds, and sight of black bears were routine on most summer days.
The scenic area was something I was always grateful for. I lived completely alone since the death of my parents. An accidental fire took both of their lives. Once I collected my inheritance, I relocated to a much more peaceful region. I had always fantasized about moving there.
I tried to start a relationship with Samantha. I had gone to High School with her sixteen years before. She had gone on to become a respected Detective. My attempt at something long lasting with her failed. She was too career oriented. I was reeling from grief. Focusing on building something meaningful with her was a pipe dream.
Things around my community changed once the Murphy family went missing.
The first sign that something was off on that Wednesday was how their blinds had closed. Their silver Chevy Chrysler remained parked in the driveway.
A tennis instructor at the country club noticed the wife of that house did not show up for the program. He called their number to make sure everything was alright. When no one responded, he notified the authorities. Rumors abounded immediately among the home owners association about an alleged affair. The gossip only furthered when the married couple and their three kids were not found in the abode.
I watched from my balcony as the patrolmen roped the place off with caution tape. The domicile was a three story building with brick chimney’s and a few peaked roofs in the style of English towers. They were beige, light blue and crimson.
On the morning of the Murphy’s desertion of society, the architecture became a hollow image. It was one that was once filled with activity and life.
The law did what they could. Any success they may have had in the investigation was secret. A few months passed by and they removed the caution tape.
I followed the on-line police logs. The weather was pristine and clear the day they vanished. The fact that there were no witnesses to what direction they may have gone disturbed me.
I had heard how the man, Frank Murphy, had a bit of a temper and always had a bourbon in hand. I had heard mutual friends describe him as an alcoholic in denial of his servitude to liquor. He was an indignant individual who knew no true repercussions for his behavior. He always had bail money from a software company he founded and sold a long time ago.
I was never close to that family, but I peered out at their vacant house far more than I ever had. I was in need of an answer. What could have happened?
2
I called Samantha one evening as I sat on my bed, wondering how she would respond to my reaching out. We were never argumentative or on bad terms. I still worried about her reaction, and hoped it would not be a dismissive one.
I heard her say hello. Her voice still impressed me. I had almost forgotten how silky her tone was. I knew it could change to a much firmer pitch when she was interviewing a suspect.
“Hi, Sam. I’d like to know if you’d be free tomorrow for a cup of coffee. We can go to that place, The Bean Field, off Pond road. It’s been a while and I know you have a lot to tell me about what’s new in your life.”
There was a pause on the other end, and for a second a bout of anxiety hit me. I judged my own words as robotic, stilted, and sure to push her away. I reasoned she was summoning an excuse to get out of having to interact with me. How dare I presume she would even entertain the notion of having a meeting.
“That sounds great,” she said. “Tomorrow is my day off, luckily for you. I’m in the middle of an incident right now. It’s a five car pile-up about forty minutes from where you live. I’ve gotta run. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
When she hung up, I was triumphant. I looked at our old text conversations. I realized we had not been in communication with each other for over twelve months. Now was my opportunity to reconcile that gap of unintended avoidance. I knew it would be an undeserved opportunity.
3
I sat outside of the cafe the next morning at a black metal table. I had a view of rolling hills dotted with trees. A highway with multitudinous shrubberies sat on either side of it. I sipped a piccolo latte while waiting for her.
When she arrived and stepped out of her hatchback in the parking lot, her appearance floored me. She had not dressed up for our supposed date, but that did not make a difference. She had arrived from the gym and wore shorts and a top set. She donned a gray and green hoodie.
She sat across from me and reached for the menu.
“Can you go to the front and order me avocado toast?” Samantha asked. “I’ll also take a mocha with a few shots of espresso. Please.”
I did exactly that. When I returned with her items, she apologized for consuming her meal in less than two minutes.
“I hadn’t eaten since five PM yesterday,” she said between sips.
“I understand,” I said. “I doubt you ever have a consistent schedule anymore.”
“You’re right, but that’s why I have to enjoy my free time when I can.”
We settled into talking about what had happened since we last saw each other. I referenced my trying to learn another language (French) with the hopes of moving to Europe or Canada.
After fifteen minutes of small talk, I asked her about work, but I did so with caution. It started with me wondering about what the call she was on when we were on the phone was about.
“A drunk driver blew a stop sign and hit two other vehicles,” she said. “It was ugly. A few people died. We’ll see if the man in silk pajamas gives him the proper sentence or a traffic citation.”
“You know, I’m curious about what happened to the Murphy’s, if they’re hurt or not.”
“You and everyone else,” she said. “We’ve been getting so many witness accounts, and so far they’ve all been bogus. All I know is what I saw when I got there.”
“I didn’t know you were one of the responders,” I said.
“Yeah. Something about the place was off from the moment I walked in. I found heavy items in placed they should not have been in. The toolbox was not in the garage but on the second story. A disassembled snowblower lay scattered everywhere in pieces. The oven door was on their bed. Frank Murphy was not the strongest guy in the world, either. For him to cause the kind of property damage I saw doesn’t make a lot of sense. At the risk of sounding crazy, inexplicable things happened when I was there.”
“Like what?”
“I was under the impression that something was playing a trick on me. Electrical outlets sparked a few times out of nowhere. The ceiling fan would go from still to spinning when I looked up at it. Books would fall off of the shelves. A volume on black magic, of all things, almost hit the top of my head when I walked on by. Another book about fairies collapsed with it.”
“So the home intruder set up a bunch of weird diversions,” I said. “I’ve heard of that before. These killers or kidnappers want the victims to think there was more than one of them. It’s so their account’s disputed in court.”
I’ll tell you right now,” she said, “we didn’t find any outside DNA.”
“So it’s a case of family annihilation,” I said as I took a long swig of my beverage. “I don’t know if you can substantiate the facts, but a few people have said that Emily had a big life insurance policy. Frank knew about. He may have been using steroids and having an affair, and that could have contributed to-“
It occurred to me that she eyed me with suspicion, as though I was digging too deep. I could also tell she regretted letting information about the forensic results slip.
She stood up and stared at me with a flash of anger in her eyes.
“I thought you wanted to piece something back together with me,” she said. “I didn’t know you wanted to play armchair investigator like every true crime fan. You know, your parents were kind. I wish you’d follow their example. I’ll let you get the bill.”
She walked back to her vehicle and I knew it would be a while before we conversed again.
Later that night, I stared out my window at the Murphy home. I saw a star shoot across the sky, and it almost seemed ready to plummet into the side of their house.
4
The next evening, I took a walk around the suburb. I spotted a thin line of dried red fluid along a path which led into the woods.
I was attempting to get in some movement to get my mind off of the events of the day before. Negativity and self-deprecation were all-consuming. I felt the need for a long saunter to try and release some of the meandering and pessimistic energy I accrued.
When I saw the carmine ribbon along the dark soil, a sense of worry filled me. I was not that far removed from a cul-de-sac with palatial manors a block away. There was no way I could speculate on me being the first to see it.
Could it be a hint where they are? I thought.
The notion seemed absurd, a reach.
I had read in the local newspaper that there was an uptick in bobcat sightings due to recent wildfires. The animals relocated during prior summers. I reasoned it could have been a house pet which became a victim after it got snatched away into the overgrowth.
I followed it, and the uneven road of red stretched on past many bushes and over logs. A shrill chirping in the background became louder. I moved between two conifers with petrified wood and found myself in a part of the forest I had never been in.
There were so many branches that it blacked out the falling sun. Ahead of me was a clearing. A swarm of gnats and mosquitos descended upon it. The sea of insects soared together in chaotic unison as a wave among the sedges and lichen.
I looked towards the right of the meadow and saw a ramshackle tree house. I trailed the red line towards it. I peered in through one of the windows and saw a statue of a woman with wings. I knew she was not an angel. There was no halo, nor were her organs of flight feathery, but rather they were thin and bat-like.
I entered the place knowing the danger I was putting myself in. I had tracked mud in and was oblivious to the incriminating actions I partook in. I was trespassing and risking stumbling into whoever may have owned the land. My curiosity got the better of me and caused me to keep moving forward.
The room was sparse but decorated. The walls had carvings of men and women, also with wings. Their bodies held yogic-like positions as they reached out to one another mid-air.
A piece of parchment with a few words sat in the corner. I picked it up and read it:
‘Humans are the greatest living beings to play tricks on. Especially when they go through a time of drought and extreme cold.’
I sat it down where I found it, unsure of what to make of it.
I touched the central figure’s neck. The chiseling was not only cold, but below freezing, as though I had submerged my hand in a polar pool.
The noise of some kind of bird attempting to escape a confined space reverberated below me.
Something brushed against my leg. I looked down and saw an army of glow bugs float up between the cracks, and they circled around me. They were like dragon flies. At the time I had labeled them as such, but in reality their shapes were far too humanoid.
I walked back home. I went to bed and slept. I was still perturbed at the wine-colored avenue and cabin.
I awoke in the middle of the night after something tapped at my walls from the outside. I peered out and saw the Murphy home, and observed how the blinds over their casements were wide open. A hive of mites filled every inch of the interior.
5
I found the decomposing body of a chipmunk stuffed into the tailpipe of my vehicle the next day.
This horrified me, because the deliberation of the act was too evident to ignore. While I did have a surveillance camera on my porch, the coverage of my vehicle was non-existent. I calmed myself down by thinking it was likely a tempestuous child. I retrieved a pair of medical gloves and disposed of the creature before going on with the errand. The rotting body had a horrible smell. It was like an onion left out in humidity for days, and my stomach turned as I sealed it off in the garbage with the lid.
The next morning, I looked in my closet. Some of my favorite shirts had disintegrated. Holes and patches of destroyed fabric littered them. I found it odd, and even searched on-line for possible answers before I decided it had to be a moth infestation. I sprayed lavender. Information on a website statEd that was a cure-all, but the problem persisted. It bothered me that I had not seen a single aphid, but I pushed that concern away.
A few days afterward, when I had tossed my disheveled pieces of attire, the power in my house went out. This was not such an unusual occurrence during the heavy winter months. For it to occur in the summer was strange.
It was a rolling blackout. Once my house had electricity again, I noticed how someone moved items around.
Something turned my kitchen table on its side and stuffed into a part of the kitchen I would have never placed it in.
I grabbed a butcher knife and did a sweep of the premises, and I did not find anything. There were no footprints or signs of anything else tampered with. When I got to the second story, birds nested along the tree tops, and the repugnant odor of fish attacked me.
My allergies became insufferable over the next month. Nothing purchased over the counter which helped it.
6
I went to the beach on an overcast day. After roughly half a mile of walking, I saw an illustration someone had drawn in the sand with a stick. It was of a being with airfoils.
A light precipitation had fallen earlier. As I trailed along the former part of the sand, a glint in the corner of my eye caught my attention. I looked out at the water and saw what appeared to be a light blue outline of wings beneath the surface.
A phosphorescent wall of creatures surrounded me.
As the days march on, I know I am stalked by something I cannot rebel against, let alone have any agency or autonomy over. My pillowcases have shredded, the pipes in my basement have burst, and someone left me a gift at my front door. When I opened it, I saw mice scurry away. It was a book, and it was one about the history of fairies.
I picked it up and had to blow the dust off of it. Someone had stolen it from a musty subterranean chamber and brought it here.
I theorized that it was Samantha, passive aggressive with her disappointment in me. Yet I flip through its pages and find it all too familiar. I cannot help but wonder if this is a sign of something far more dangerous.
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2023.05.28 13:55 Colt_Leasure The family next door disappeared. The answer to their vanishing is in the woods.
I live in a suburb surrounded by forest. My house is in a row of other properties built next to a tree line. The neighborhood was always quiet. The sounds of crickets, birds, and sight of black bears were routine on most summer days.
The scenic area was something I was always grateful for. I lived completely alone since the death of my parents. An accidental fire took both of their lives. Once I collected my inheritance, I relocated to a much more peaceful region. I had always fantasized about moving there.
I tried to start a relationship with Samantha. I had gone to High School with her sixteen years before. She had gone on to become a respected Detective. My attempt at something long lasting with her failed. She was too career oriented. I was reeling from grief. Focusing on building something meaningful with her was a pipe dream.
Things around my community changed once the Murphy family went missing.
The first sign that something was off on that Wednesday was how their blinds had closed. Their silver Chevy Chrysler remained parked in the driveway.
A tennis instructor at the country club noticed the wife of that house did not show up for the program. He called their number to make sure everything was alright. When no one responded, he notified the authorities. Rumors abounded immediately among the home owners association about an alleged affair. The gossip only furthered when the married couple and their three kids were not found in the abode.
I watched from my balcony as the patrolmen roped the place off with caution tape. The domicile was a three story building with brick chimney’s and a few peaked roofs in the style of English towers. They were beige, light blue and crimson.
On the morning of the Murphy’s desertion of society, the architecture became a hollow image. It was one that was once filled with activity and life.
The law did what they could. Any success they may have had in the investigation was secret. A few months passed by and they removed the caution tape.
I followed the on-line police logs. The weather was pristine and clear the day they vanished. The fact that there were no witnesses to what direction they may have gone disturbed me.
I had heard how the man, Frank Murphy, had a bit of a temper and always had a bourbon in hand. I had heard mutual friends describe him as an alcoholic in denial of his servitude to liquor. He was an indignant individual who knew no true repercussions for his behavior. He always had bail money from a software company he founded and sold a long time ago.
I was never close to that family, but I peered out at their vacant house far more than I ever had. I was in need of an answer. What could have happened?
*
I called Samantha one evening as I sat on my bed, wondering how she would respond to my reaching out. We were never argumentative or on bad terms. I still worried about her reaction, and hoped it would not be a dismissive one.
I heard her say hello. Her voice still impressed me. I had almost forgotten how silky her tone was. I knew it could change to a much firmer pitch when she was interviewing a suspect.
“Hi, Sam. I’d like to know if you’d be free tomorrow for a cup of coffee. We can go to that place, The Bean Field, off Pond road. It’s been a while and I know you have a lot to tell me about what’s new in your life.”
There was a pause on the other end, and for a second a bout of anxiety hit me. I judged my own words as robotic, stilted, and sure to push her away. I reasoned she was summoning an excuse to get out of having to interact with me. How dare I presume she would even entertain the notion of having a meeting.
“That sounds great,” she said. “Tomorrow is my day off, luckily for you. I’m in the middle of an incident right now. It’s a five car pile-up about forty minutes from where you live. I’ve gotta run. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
When she hung up, I was triumphant. I looked at our old text conversations. I realized we had not been in communication with each other for over twelve months. Now was my opportunity to reconcile that gap of unintended avoidance. I knew it would be an undeserved opportunity.
*
I sat outside of the cafe the next morning at a black metal table. I had a view of rolling hills dotted with trees. A highway with multitudinous shrubberies sat on either side of it. I sipped a piccolo latte while waiting for her.
When she arrived and stepped out of her hatchback in the parking lot, her appearance floored me. She had not dressed up for our supposed date, but that did not make a difference. She had arrived from the gym and wore shorts and a top set. She donned a gray and green hoodie.
She sat across from me and reached for the menu.
“Can you go to the front and order me avocado toast?” Samantha asked. “I’ll also take a mocha with a few shots of espresso. Please.”
I did exactly that. When I returned with her items, she apologized for consuming her meal in less than two minutes.
“I hadn’t eaten since five PM yesterday,” she said between sips.
“I understand,” I said. “I doubt you ever have a consistent schedule anymore.”
“You’re right, but that’s why I have to enjoy my free time when I can.”
We settled into talking about what had happened since we last saw each other. I referenced my trying to learn another language (French) with the hopes of moving to Europe or Canada.
After fifteen minutes of small talk, I asked her about work, but I did so with caution. It started with me wondering about what the call she was on when we were on the phone was about.
“A drunk driver blew a stop sign and hit two other vehicles,” she said. “It was ugly. A few people died. We’ll see if the man in silk pajamas gives him the proper sentence or a traffic citation.”
“You know, I’m curious about what happened to the Murphy’s, if they’re hurt or not.”
“You and everyone else,” she said. “We’ve been getting so many witness accounts, and so far they’ve all been bogus. All I know is what I saw when I got there.”
“I didn’t know you were one of the responders,” I said.
“Yeah. Something about the place was off from the moment I walked in. I found heavy items in placed they should not have been in. The toolbox was not in the garage but on the second story. A disassembled snowblower lay scattered everywhere in pieces. The oven door was on their bed. Frank Murphy was not the strongest guy in the world, either. For him to cause the kind of property damage I saw doesn’t make a lot of sense. At the risk of sounding crazy, inexplicable things happened when I was there.”
“Like what?”
“I was under the impression that something was playing a trick on me. Electrical outlets sparked a few times out of nowhere. The ceiling fan would go from still to spinning when I looked up at it. Books would fall off of the shelves. A volume on black magic, of all things, almost hit the top of my head when I walked on by. Another book about fairies collapsed with it.”
“So the home intruder set up a bunch of weird diversions,” I said. “I’ve heard of that before. These killers or kidnappers want the victims to think there was more than one of them. It’s so their account’s disputed in court.”
I’ll tell you right now,” she said, “we didn’t find any outside DNA.”
“So it’s a case of family annihilation,” I said as I took a long swig of my beverage. “I don’t know if you can substantiate the facts, but a few people have said that Emily had a big life insurance policy. Frank knew about. He may have been using steroids and having an affair, and that could have contributed to-“
It occurred to me that she eyed me with suspicion, as though I was digging too deep. I could also tell she regretted letting information about the forensic results slip.
She stood up and stared at me with a flash of anger in her eyes.
“I thought you wanted to piece something back together with me,” she said. “I didn’t know you wanted to play armchair investigator like every true crime fan. You know, your parents were kind. I wish you’d follow their example. I’ll let you get the bill.”
She walked back to her vehicle and I knew it would be a while before we conversed again.
Later that night, I stared out my window at the Murphy home. I saw a star shoot across the sky, and it almost seemed ready to plummet into the side of their house.
*
The next evening, I took a walk around the suburb. I spotted a thin line of dried red fluid along a path which led into the woods.
I was attempting to get in some movement to get my mind off of the events of the day before. Negativity and self-deprecation were all-consuming. I felt the need for a long saunter to try and release some of the meandering and pessimistic energy I accrued.
When I saw the carmine ribbon along the dark soil, a sense of worry filled me. I was not that far removed from a cul-de-sac with palatial manors a block away. There was no way I could speculate on me being the first to see it.
Could it be a hint where they are? I thought.
The notion seemed absurd, a reach.
I had read in the local newspaper that there was an uptick in bobcat sightings due to recent wildfires. The animals relocated during prior summers. I reasoned it could have been a house pet which became a victim after it got snatched away into the overgrowth.
I followed it, and the uneven road of red stretched on past many bushes and over logs. A shrill chirping in the background became louder. I moved between two conifers with petrified wood and found myself in a part of the forest I had never been in.
There were so many branches that it blacked out the falling sun. Ahead of me was a clearing. A swarm of gnats and mosquitos descended upon it. The sea of insects soared together in chaotic unison as a wave among the sedges and lichen.
I looked towards the right of the meadow and saw a ramshackle tree house. I trailed the red line towards it. I peered in through one of the windows and saw a statue of a woman with wings. I knew she was not an angel. There was no halo, nor were her organs of flight feathery, but rather they were thin and bat-like.
I entered the place knowing the danger I was putting myself in. I had tracked mud in and was oblivious to the incriminating actions I partook in. I was trespassing and risking stumbling into whoever may have owned the land. My curiosity got the better of me and caused me to keep moving forward.
The room was sparse but decorated. The walls had carvings of men and women, also with wings. Their bodies held yogic-like positions as they reached out to one another mid-air.
A piece of parchment with a few words sat in the corner. I picked it up and read it:
‘Humans are the greatest living beings to play tricks on. Especially when they go through a time of drought and extreme cold.’
I sat it down where I found it, unsure of what to make of it.
I touched the central figure’s neck. The chiseling was not only cold, but below freezing, as though I had submerged my hand in a polar pool.
The noise of some kind of bird attempting to escape a confined space reverberated below me.
Something brushed against my leg. I looked down and saw an army of glow bugs float up between the cracks, and they circled around me. They were like dragon flies. At the time I had labeled them as such, but in reality their shapes were far too humanoid.
I walked back home. I went to bed and slept. I was still perturbed at the wine-colored avenue and cabin.
I awoke in the middle of the night after something tapped at my walls from the outside. I peered out and saw the Murphy home, and observed how the blinds over their casements were wide open. A hive of mites filled every inch of the interior.
*
I found the decomposing body of a chipmunk stuffed into the tailpipe of my vehicle the next day.
This horrified me, because the deliberation of the act was too evident to ignore. While I did have a surveillance camera on my porch, the coverage of my vehicle was non-existent. I calmed myself down by thinking it was likely a tempestuous child. I retrieved a pair of medical gloves and disposed of the creature before going on with the errand. The rotting body had a horrible smell. It was like an onion left out in humidity for days, and my stomach turned as I sealed it off in the garbage with the lid.
The next morning, I looked in my closet. Some of my favorite shirts had disintegrated. Holes and patches of destroyed fabric littered them. I found it odd, and even searched on-line for possible answers before I decided it had to be a moth infestation. I sprayed lavender. Information on a website statEd that was a cure-all, but the problem persisted. It bothered me that I had not seen a single aphid, but I pushed that concern away.
A few days afterward, when I had tossed my disheveled pieces of attire, the power in my house went out. This was not such an unusual occurrence during the heavy winter months. For it to occur in the summer was strange.
It was a rolling blackout. Once my house had electricity again, I noticed how someone moved items around.
Something turned my kitchen table on its side and stuffed into a part of the kitchen I would have never placed it in.
I grabbed a butcher knife and did a sweep of the premises, and I did not find anything. There were no footprints or signs of anything else tampered with. When I got to the second story, birds nested along the tree tops, and the repugnant odor of fish attacked me.
My allergies became insufferable over the next month. Nothing purchased over the counter which helped it.
*
I went to the beach on an overcast day. After roughly half a mile of walking, I saw an illustration someone had drawn in the sand with a stick. It was of a being with airfoils.
A light precipitation had fallen earlier. As I trailed along the former part of the sand, a glint in the corner of my eye caught my attention. I looked out at the water and saw what appeared to be a light blue outline of wings beneath the surface.
A phosphorescent wall of creatures surrounded me.
As the days march on, I know I am stalked by something I cannot rebel against, let alone have any agency or autonomy over. My pillowcases have shredded, the pipes in my basement have burst, and someone left me a gift at my front door. When I opened it, I saw mice scurry away. It was a book, and it was one about the history of fairies.
I picked it up and had to blow the dust off of it. Someone had stolen it from a musty subterranean chamber and brought it here.
I theorized that it was Samantha, passive aggressive with her disappointment in me. Yet I flip through its pages and find it all too familiar. I cannot help but wonder if this is a sign of something far more dangerous.
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2023.05.28 13:50 Cool_ball999 Awaken 19/ a prey's pride
[First]() [Prev]()
This took an unbearable amount of time, sorry, I was busy with tests and you know… school stuff, it's not looking good for my writing, I pretty much only have free time with my phone for only 2 hours a day except for weekends. As a compensation for the ridiculous amount of time this chapter took, it's going to be extra long, and have action parts again (kind of) and some gore, enjoy!
—-~----
"What was it again?"
"Schen- i mean Schon"
"Right, what got you here, near the edge and all? It's a nice edge, but still an edge"
"Desperate for work I guess, I assume you're the same?"
Schon… no, Schen… answered as he took a sip out of his drink, it isn't as bad as he thought it would be, it's sweet, and at least it isn't recycled water.
"Kind of, I just work here because… well… my skill set isn't impressive"
"A loader, no? All that work in the cargo bay?"
"Yeah, what does it feel like being an SC?"
"Being a security captain feels…"
Schen took a glance at his tag, hidden beneath his shirt and new uniform, a piece of memory and evidence of who he once was.
"...familiar"
"Oh yeah… aren't you an ex-mil?"
"I am"
"Why did you quit?"
"It's… it got a bit too mu it can ch for me, though i do miss my team, best few people i've ever worked with"
"Good terms?"
"Brothers, live by them, die by them, not literal on the latter of course, but it can happen, too bad we're disbanded now"
"Why?"
"Let's just say they don't wanna work without their favorite captain"
"Oh… Where are they now?"
"Living their best life with their family i hope, least there's nothing to threaten their lives there"
"Why don't you go back to yours?"
"Don't have one, too old to return back home and do nothing, and too old to find a mate, kinda missed my chance back then"
"And you're satisfied with just being an SC in a random cargo ship that visits edge territories?"
"It's still something, besides, i've got more than enough experience for it… hmm… lunch's over, good talk"
"Looks like it is, nice to know you… Schon?"
He nodded in confirmation, and went to pay for his lunch. It was decent, but he'd rather have it stale than having to actually pay, he can't believe he actually missed those stale rations. Perhaps because he was used to it, old habits and preferences are hard to shake off, they said. He went back to his post, just a little room filled with camera monitors with a teeny tiny armory next to it. Genuinely, it looked pathetic next to the military armory he was used to.
But the weapons were familiar, kind of, just lacking the usual stopping power and attachments of the ones he used to have. After the (unfortunate) disbanding of his team and his (honorable) discharge from the military as well as the new (rather stupid if you ask him) identity of Schon, he was desperate for work. It's his fault really, he should've been at home enjoying the rest of his life now that that Schen technically no longer exists.
But the soldier in him wanted to do something, so he did, and now here he is, a simple SC in a cargo ship, which took an unnecessary amount of effort, as apparently the union was still somewhat skittish about the video he broadcasted before he went on the temporary desertion, but now that he knows everything, it doesn't really matter. It isn't bad by any means, but it ain't the military, and the more he worked the more he wished for a pirate attack. He also just missed being together with his team, but alas, they have their own lives, so he had to let them go, though he does have their contact number saved on his personal datapad.
He turned on the only monitor inside his room that isn't used to look through a camera, and looked for anything interesting in the network. Interesting as in any news regarding the 'Goels' and their recent introduction, he had been keeping a close eye on it. He doesn't need to, it isn't his business anymore and if he tried to make it his business again he can expect agents on his tail, but since he was heavily involved anyway, he thought why not as well do it. And it was just fine so far, though he has no clue how the green one, Abel if his memory serves him, turned from a drone to… well… that.
He learned a bit about who humans are, and what humanity was like, before it went away and was 'replaced' by the Goels. And as far as he knows they're dead, like extinct dead, so obviously the appearance of the cheery human male that acted as the Goel ambassador shocked him. He still has no clue now, though his theory as to how essentially boils down to 'ancient civilization fuckery'. And as far as he can tell, there's no problem with that, yet, the discussions were relatively smooth if the news were to be trusted and the council seems to actually starting to trust the Goels, kind of.
He browsed through the tabs and websites, most of which he already read and glossed over.
Trade offer accepted between union and Goels
No surprise there, no man or woman in the council wanted to pass up such a deal.
Military showcase ends in awe, fear, and admirance
He saw the videos on that one, it was impressive.
Goel ambassador visits Caevit palace garden, Godfather was shook
He suppose having such an important guest roaming around your garden can be a bit complicated, so he understands.
Goel ambassador faints during a direct discussion with the council, paramedics clueless
Now that's interesting, and frankly worrying, he didn't get to see the full broadcast yesterday, actually he missed most of it, so he didn't get to see what happened.
"What happened to you?"
He mumbled as he read the article and looked at the pictures and videos of the accident. Unknown cause, immediately escorted, and the sudden silence from the Goels, and it has been for almost half a cycle now. Strange, he looked through the video again, watched how Abel behaved, and noted the many oddities present. He seemed just fine, just giving his presentation to the council as professional as one can be as an ambassador and then suddenly he just… dropped, he thought about exhaustion at first, but the longer he thinks about it the dumber it gets.
No way the current Abel is human, he was explicitly told by him that there are no humans left, so what is it?. He couldn't come up with anything, but kept it in mind as he looked for more info on the current situation. It wasn't long until he realized there's nothing else he can learn and turned off the computer. He looked at the time, and suddenly remembered something vital, alcohol break, he reached down under his desk and took out a bottle, the very same one that he took to the desert planet with him.
No shot glass no problem, he popped the cap off and drink straight from the bottle, not very classy but whatever. He hid it back under the desk and walked out of his office now that he actually remember something actually vital, his men. The security team more precisely, and he's the current captain, someone's had to check on them. He ran into one guard waiting around the cafeteria and greeted them.
"All good?"
"All good, no danger"
"Yet, keep an eye out, and if you can, help anyone in need, being a security isn't just about holding weapons and warding off pirates, you should know that by now"
"Yes sir, sorry"
"Sigh i've worked with trainees that are better than this"
He grumbled as he left to look for another man to inspect. His new subordinates are… a particular group. Some of them take the job seriously, some are a bit more relaxed but still vigilant, but most, like the one he just gave a mouthful to is God awful, improper stance, manners, no incentives, and utterly basic in weapon mastery. He has to cut them some slack, they're just basic security after all, not soldiers, but still. He ran into a more favorable one patrolling the hallway leading to the reactor, he actually knows this one's name, Koern, a Civean, and he couldn't be more glad he actually got a salute from him.
"Greetings, Captain Schon, is there any problem?"
"It's Sche- i mean… yes thank you, and no, there's no problem, just daily inspection"
"I see, how do I do?"
"As usual, very good, keep It up"
"Thank you sir… sir can i ask you something? I've been considering looking for you but now you're here…"
"Sure, i can spare some time"
"Can I request a leave from you sir?"
"I can if there are valid reasons"
"I've requested it to the captain, but all she said is that i should ask you first"
"I see, but what's the reason?"
"Family matter, I have a relative on a planet named Rosan IV, ever heard of it?"
"Isn't that the newly built colony planet?"
"It is, a much better built colony compared to the rest, new union projects and all that stuff, my cousin signed up for it, we've been communicating just fine so far, until a few days ago"
"What happened?"
"I don't know, he just went… silent, i thought okay, maybe he's busy or there's a problem with the communication there, so i just waited, but it has been too long now, usually he sends a message almost daily, now there's nothing"
"I don't think you need to ask for a leave in that case"
"Why?"
"Rosan IV is in the list of destination of this ship, station building material shipping, after this one we should be on the way there"
"Oh thank God, i knew i should've checked the list"
"Well… this is an edge operating ship, you know? In that case, all you'll need is a shore leave on any station there, short but should be enough for you to check in on your cousin"
"That's all i need sir, thank you"
"Of course, now continue your work, we'll be there before you know it"
"Yes sir"
Schen walked away with a little curiosity in his mind, Rosan IV huh? isn't that the planet that's been really silent? He remembered a conversation at the cafeteria, a few people were talking about it. Some talk about how stupid of a project it was, how it was no different than any other colony, a 'gold plated' lie if you will. But most were talking about how it became a 'ghost' of sorts, communications fell, ships that come and go there go missing, a few creepy tales here and there, it was almost a horror story.
He doubted it, such an ambitious project is bound to have some issues, there's a huge price for luxury, and that price is probably hitting right now. Which made him worried a little, a new colony is a gold mine for pirates and raiders, that was probably the price, pirate intervention. But if all goes well, it shouldn't be that bad, no way those ridiculous stories are real…. Maybe.
—-~----
Rana sat down on his padded seat, in his room, in his literal castle, thinking, not about anything in particular, but just thinking. And maybe glossing over his new arm again, to be in awe again, he still doesn't know how the movement is that smooth. Pearl white, shaped just like his other arm, even has the claws, and probably smoother in terms of movements than his actual arm despite being a prosthetic. It has been quite a while since his particular experience on that planet, and the prosthetic is still not showing any issue, any normal prosthetic would break down or need maintenance after this long of a time.
It's also… self repairing? He's not sure if he's hallucinating, but he's pretty sure the arm rebuilt itself after he accidentally bumped it into something hard. A small piece of the outer casing fell off, he didn't pay much attention to it, until it disappeared minutes after when he tried to look at it to see how bad it was. All in all, a new experience, awe inducing and a bit scary, would be really nice too, if it wasn't for-
"Rana"
"AAH! Oh… dad…"
-That, his father.
"It's time to-"
"Look at my arm and pry it open, i know"
"Good, let's-"
"But why?"
"Sigh Rana, we had this conversation before, you know the reasons"
"Well I don't want to care about it!"
"It's for our people…"
"No, it's for yourself! Come on dad! Don't you hear what they said? What did they offer? They gave us everything!"
"No one in this universe, organic or not, is stupid enough to give away vital information and material to someone else they just met, they must be hiding something"
"So they're lying, is that it?"
"Yes, i… we believe so"
"Okay, give me a reason why they're lying"
"That's what a dumb leader would do"
"Oh please, don't act like dad's not just another servant to the matriarch"
"She's your grandma"
"Doesn't change anything dad, and no, i don't like laying on a bed while people i don't know try to pry open my arm"
"Sigh does that mean you don't-"
"No"
"Fine… as you wish… but i hope you can understand"
"I already understand, and i don't like it"
"....."
Rana heard his room's door opening and then closing behind him, and sighed. Life hasn't been the same since he returned, his father has been a lot more serious, he can understand that, it makes sense. But he had been putting him into these weird 'inspections' ; they weren't inspections, they were straight up experiments, to try and pry open his new arm. That was how he discovered the last strange and fascinating thing about it, it can feel pain.
He remembered how everyone in the room froze when he screamed in pain, they were bewildered. It was only when he kicked the person inserting some sort of needle-like thing into the gaps of his prosthetic in the face that they knew what was happening. And yet, knowing what it does, his father still insists they do more of his experiments. It doesn't seem to matter how many anesthetics, painkillers and other treatments have been done, he can still feel the pain, it pops up from time to time, sometimes waking him from his sleep.
It was not something he wants to go through again, even if he's unconscious during the operation. At Least it isn't everyday he gets 'inspected' thanks to someone who dislikes the idea as much as he did. Rana heard his door open again, and smiled knowing who it was.
"Rana? Honey? There you are…"
"Hey mom…"
"Have you eaten yet?"
"Mom, a servant came here an hour ago, bringing the food, of course i did"
"Good, something to help you recover"
"Mom, I'm good, okay?"
"Nonsense…"
She gave him a pat and a scratch on the head, his favorite guilty pleasure. He always feels like he's still a child everytime she does it, and not a grown man, but it would be a total lie to say he doesn't like it.
"You need energy to recover from that"
She tapped his prosthetic.
"It's not like it's gonna grow back…"
"One can hope, it's terrible what happened to you"
"Well, it's okay now, they redeemed themselves"
"Hmph… no one's hurting my boy, no one, not even a sentient AI from a different era of the universe"
"Thanks mom… But i don't think you're fit enough to fight Cain"
"I'll beat him with my motherly aura, the thing he's missing, anyway, how's your arm, darling?"
"It's fine… still hurts sometimes"
"Sigh if only your father would listen, him and his ridiculous experiments, what's in that arm anyway?"
"Technology used by a race that defied time…"
"Doesn't justify him doing those things to you… he's been here, doesn't he?"
"He just left"
"Hmm…. You two had a talk?"
"He's just here to… you know what he does"
"Well glad to know he doesn't get through with it today, alright sweetie, just here to check up on you"
"Mom, i'm not a boy anymore"
"A boy you are not, you are a grown man, but my boy you are, and always will be, see you tomorrow honey"
"Stay safe"
"Always…"
Well that doesn't last long, Rana thought as his mother left the room, that's one of the issues they had since forever, she is always very busy. Because unlike father she's not the type to just sit behind a desk and give out orders, she's a lot more active, and caring at that. His father is the supreme general, sure, but Rana always looked up to her more, and her job as the health minister. She's always on a trip to visit hospitals all around the union and other things he doesn't know much about. And of course, unlike his father, that means she's not always home, shame.
Rana thought about it, and suddenly remembered his interaction with Lnaia that night when he first woke up to discover his arm missing. He never told it to her, but the reason she felt familiar is that both her and his mother have the same job, making sure of people's wellbeing. He thought maybe she would know, but maybe not everyone knows that the current Qrid health minister is married to the supreme general, it isn't exactly a super popular thing.
Sometimes Rana gets reminded of who his parents were everytime he looks at any news regarding the Goels, about Cain and Abel. Just how unironically similiar they are, to be so far apart in mindset and goals and yet so close to each other through love… well… atleast Cain and Abel did, he's not so sure about his parents, not anymore.
—-~----
Faen sat in his office, stressed out of his mind, everything has been a mess, Abel's incident at the councillor station, the countless interviews asking for his opinion, it was, somehow, getting a bit too much. Faen expected everything, but Abel passing out in the middle of a speech for no reason is not one of them, and for the Goels to go completely silent after, just what in the world is happening?. He doesn't like it, he doesn't like being out of control, out of the know, not knowing anything makes him uncomfortable, knowing that it can decide the fate of his kind made it near unbearable.
He founds himself scratching his own desk with his claws from all the stress, he stopped, and sighed as he brushed off the wood chips. Maybe he should he take his medications again, he opened a drawer on his desk and took out a small plastic container with labels on it, a medication for high blood pressure, he took one pill and set it back inside the drawer.
"Still on your meds, love?"
A voice came out of nowhere, it trigerred his instinct to reach for the concealed handgun next to him, but as he aimed towards whoever's in front of him, he realized it was a mistake.
"Yana…"
"Still as nimble as i remember, though you got a bit stiff on the arms there"
"I thought you already left…"
"Come on Faen, both you and i know i wouldn't leave without at least saying goodbye to you"
"Is that all you're here for?"
He said as he put the gun away, coming back to a more calm demeanor.
"Of course not, i'm here to check up on our son, and talk to you"
He raised his eyebrow a bit at that.
"Rare…"
"Not as rare as you making a call to me, we need to talk Faen"
"About?..."
"Sometimes i wonder if you take all the medicine i prescribed for you…of course about our son!"
"Sigh is this about-"
"Yes! What makes you think it's a good idea to probe our son like he's some sort of foreign creature?"
"I've taken every precaution, he's been given anesthetics and-"
"Oh i don't care, it's not about how bad of a pain he's experiencing, or how subdued it is so it's not dangerous, this is about him experiencing it in the first place! that's not supposed to happen!"
"Yana, please, we have the best doctors working on him"
"Well I don't believe you…"
"Why?"
"Because I'm the health minister and I need to see their license, and if I don't… i see them as unqualified as to even hold a needle, but i'm here not to hear you say what or… how you do this, we've been there, it doesn't matter… he's still our son and i disagree, what i want to know is why"
Faen massaged his forehead out of annoyance.
"Because-"
"You're scared…. I know"
"What?"
"You're scared of the Goels, of their ways"
"Anyone would"
"I know… and you're trying to do something about it…"
She sat down on the chair right in front of his desk, it was preserved for only other generals and the matriarch herself, incase of a private meeting, her sitting there is technically illegal.
"....But does that change anything? Change the fact that they offer help?"
"You can't trust anyone just like that, they're hiding something"
"And you can't just distrust them for the same reason, it goes both ways, even if they are, is that really a reason for you to dissect our son?"
"It's just his arm"
"So what? You're trying to take it off and leave him armless?"
"It's not the only prosthetic in the world"
"And yet the finest! You have to admit it, they are superior in many ways, they are thousands of years ahead of us, I have never seen such a sophisticated prosthetic before, you know me, this is my field, and that thing on him makes our best prosthetic look ancient!"
"But then what am I supposed to do? Do nothing? Sit there as those things do whatever they want to us? to the union?"
"No! you work with them… i heard what you two were fighting about, i was outside, about why the Goels have no reason to lie, and i agree with him"
"Then what?"
"Here's the thing Faen, there's a difference between being exploited, and working together… they're looking forward to working with you, giving the union their technology and helping it improve… you on the other hand… want to exploit them, learn what they can do and how they did it and then see if you can do it for yourself, i get the point, but why would you steal something that is given out for free?"
"Do I really have to say this again? It's because-"
"Pride… It's because of pride… looks like the old sentiment that caused the great war all those years ago are still here… shame, i thought we would be better as a species, turns out we never change, what a disappointment"
She uttered those last words with bitterness and a flat face, and left the room without another word, she didn't look back, or say goodbye as she is probably leaving, as if she doesn't care anymore. Faen was half stunned, half angry at what she said, that was just her assumption, he reasoned to himself. But now he can't stop thinking about it, as much as he tries to deny it, is that really him? Is that what she thinks of him? A disappointment?
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2023.05.28 13:46 Toxin126 [TotK] Some thoughts/critiques and where I think Tears stumbled to deliver on BotW criticisms
After finishing the game and doing a good ~80% of the content Im left with some thoughts.
While i think this game IS an upgrade over BoTW in a good amount of ways i definitely think that it seems to trip over itself again in some other important ways too - in this I would say the main issues are Combat uniqueness, The Main Story Path/Dungeons, and Unique side content. These are pillars i would say would be some of (if not the most) important in a game like Tears and while Tears does improve on those pillars in some ways i feel it doesnt seem like they did enough to truly improve or address criticisms and break the boundaries over the first game.
This sequel is largely a retreading of the first games format, albeit in a new/fresh way, which is commendable that they were able to capture BoTW in a new way and "for the most part" deliver in making it feel fresh and fun, but it also feels like they focused TOO much on expanding the game outward (with the half-baked sky islands and underground and the numerous caves/shrines) instead of "imo" the better route which would be expanding the game in-ward with deeper questlines/progression/rewards/challenges/character moments. I think where ToTK fails is in trying to appeal way too broadly to the general playerbase, they lost out on really improving on and pushing past the criticisms of the past game, instead they just gave us more things to do but largely approached in the same way as BoTW with really simple repetition and not enough unique areas/puzzles or rewards, with too much focus on building when it can largely be ignored in favor of simple designs or autobuilds. While these certain things do shake up the formula, im still left with thinking alot of the other pillars of the game suffered for it.
- First up about the story I definitely just hoped they wouldve tried to approach the main path in a new (maybe more linear way) instead of repeating the 4 champion slog with weak mini-dungeons/temples and actually give us fun moments that build with all the characters along the path that lead to these big sprawling multiple-sectioned dungeons. Have the geoglyphs sectioned and lead to another chronologically along the main quest (seriously why did they think having the glyphs be aimless like BotW helped in any way to the story is just crazy). Have the Sages react dynamically based on your progress giving them atleast a couple lines interacting with eachother. To say the characters are milquetoast at best is an understatement, their designs and motivations are good they just needed to give them more outside of the obvious "gotta help muh boi Link save da worl after he helps me do this fetch quest wow the ganon flashback story is so interesting the 4th time seeing it!" Also whats the point of having them leave behind their spirit when you couldve easily just had them accompany you in the same way, then you could have cool dialogue back in their towns where they react to the next thing you accomplished together and the journey wouldve felt much more alive with all your sage buddies with you irl.
- The way they handled Ganons effect on Hyrule was not the way they made the trailers out to be and this is where i think the Story hurts the most. There couldve been so much more agency and urgency if Ganons powethreat was on display while Link was knocked out in the beginning, show that time jump with peoples lives being truly affected by the Malice/Gloom, have not only the effects on display for the Sage quests but have the Malice gloom be affecting larger areas of people outside of these aswell with our mission to cleanse these areas too, Like i felt the most bad for the Koroks they pretty much lost their whole souls while the Deku Tree was infected, in contrast you got the Rito just being too cold and the Gorons being addicted to Crack Rocks. Like i get it the game needs to keep some levity to not make this 50-60 hour journey seem so bleak, Like its cool to see the resilience of Hyrule but why should i really care about saving anything when it seems like people are getting by just fine outside of the main path with people looking for mushroom drip and Mr. Tarrey-fan holding signs at every road. I also think the whole Zelda-puppet thing plays out really goofy for Ganons standards. Its such a cop-out and plays out like the writers couldnt come up with a way to give Link motivation outside of Zelda being stuck in the past and the twist doesnt hit because likely youve already seen atleast one of the glyphs that allude to whats really going on after a few hours. Idk i just think back to Twilight Princess and how they set that tone that "yeah everyones just dead pretty much you better get your ass in gear Link" obviously they want to appeal to the general audience but didnt all the marketing and tone-setting make this game out to be about the true Ganondorf coming back to wreck shit with his army and Links the only one that can come back and save them? the only thing he wrecked is peoples image of Zelda will all little trolling they did. All Links mostly there for is to have the Sages realize simple tasks that help them and then off to kill Ganon again. Granted i love the climax portion of the story but it couldve hit so much more with just a bit better worldbuilding/writing.
- With the Sky/Depths/caves it feels like they had to come up with so much more filler with them just largely being empty areas with simple puzzles and minimal non-challenging combat (minus a couple of the depth arenas i guess?) Im not sure why they couldnt come up with actually hard enemy encounters with variety (like why arent there any gibdo spawns or boss type enemies littered in the camps in the depths? why are the big Ruin areas just devoid of enemies/constructs?) but just enemy variety in general is lacking it pretty much feels just the same as BotW of just either Bokoblin spam (and no attaching backpacks to them isnt variety) and the occasional Lizals/boring Yiga ambush, and idk if its just me but the White enemies are just a pain to churn through in this game, towards the end i just avoided fighting them because they have way too much health to warrant 1-2full fused weapons. While the Boss enemies again just get relegated to their "arenas" with no other mobs to atleast add fodder (and the Boss Bokoblin just feels like a fat Moblin but atleast w/ a unique rally move) And we also downgraded the "army" encounters with just a bunch of Bokos/lizals and a Boss Boko in every-one, wheres Ganons army of lynel/Hinox/skelly squads?
- They also needed to put more time into deepening our customization of Link the hero, maybe with unlockable Combat gimmicks like past Zelda's, like wouldnt it be awesome if you could take off half of a fused weapon and Dual Wield it for like double swings/unique charged moves (also why is the sword the only weapon with a stick-movement quick tech?) Like fusing is a fun tool but doesnt it just feel like a bandaid gimmick fix for the people that hated weapon breaking? And instead we got left with goofy muddy weapons/horns stuck onto eachother that clip way into the ground hurting immersion? Just give us some sort of crafting/upgrade system or cultivate Rocktorocks through a quest or Something that isnt obscure and left into the "either fuse your weapon and do mental gymnastics on the durability and lose the cool cosmetic sheaths or suffer goofy big stick to actually put up a fight." There just shouldve been more to play around with. The progression boils down to just "pick up more things to stick on the stick" its fun for a while, but it started to lose its charm quick for me.
- Cosmetic QoL things like Transmog(seriously the Armor system has no right being this bad/tedious)/Hairstyle barberemoving or adding Armor pieces/more dyes through Cece (like really my only rewards for a long quest chain that changes Hateno is a goofy Hat/overpriced armor and the one option of taking the hood off?). I also think of character stuff like actual Dialogue options for side-quests to choose rewards or atleast personality showing from Link from time to time past the "he likes food" trope, like i know Link is a blank-slate character but man they dont really give you alot to work with in 2 full 50 hour games.
ToTK fails to bring compelling advances in these pivotal aspects that almost any sequel or other open world games would bring and that largely is probably due to the scope of the systems they put the most work into with "Ultrahand" and how much scaling back they mustve had to do with being locked to the underperforming Switch
I think Im just left with this game wishing it harkened back and embraced somewhat more to the classic design of Zelda of building this Vibe and story for this version of Link and the games progression relying more on his development as the Hero and overcoming great challenges/threats rather than "funny Link build Car for Koroks and watches Zeldas home videos with no emotion along w/ his Side characters that also get 1 quest of character development" If just a bit more focus went into some of the stuff i mentioned this game couldve been truly a great achievement in gaming, but what it delivered to me was really just "Breath of the Wild but a bit better this time and with building" which is still a great game, but it couldve been so much grander.
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2023.05.28 13:33 affinityow Stone Tablets Transcribed
Just figured I put these down in writing. You can find the stone tables in the sky [Islands that look like flowers, some you need to zoom in to see.)
I'm putting down both how they're written and Wortsworth's own translation:
- Account of a Celebration
"So swete the song of kyng Rauru ond so grete the beaute of his susteres daunce, that wer min eies ond eres captif. Ond so hende quen Sonias gasen on us alle so felt y min herte als captif fallen. Seruantes lyf, tho moche laboursum, han moche jolitee as welle. Longe be the lyf of the roial familie y love so."
Wortsworth's Take:
"This is an account of a party from those days. It says King Rauru and his older sister sang and danced together while Queen Sonia looked on. We think of royalty austere and reserved, but these nobles amused themselves with song and dance. But what a vivid recounting of a scene never before related in any history book...The descriptions of their personalities and expressions made this ancient past feel alive again. This stone tablet is a first-class find. Well done, dear Chamberlain in leaving behind this account for us."
- The Strong Queen and the Receptive King
"Sonia, quen to Hyrule's kyng bi birthe Hylian preesterresse, hirself yborn of londe, nat of skie aboven. Speken she with open herte, eornest to alle, euen even to the Zonais kyng. This kyng ythinke it gode aventure so to lerne of the londes folke. To sen his hed ybent to listenen is swich plesaunce."
Wortsworth Take:
"This one looks to be about Queen Sonia. it claims that Sonia was a priestess before marrying Rauru. Despite his status as Zonai, a people popularly thought to be gods, she would counsel him without any trepidation. Moreover, Rauru heeded this counsel. This account gives us firsthand knowledge of the nature of Queen Sonia and King Rauru's relationship."
- The Harmonious Couple
"Oft wys Rauru, kyng of kene blade, weyve his werk real in favor of the hunte. Ond oft queynte Sonia, quene of kene insight, seke out him and repaire this kyng to kyngly besynesse. in hir sapience semes she divin, that she cunne him ever finde and for hes folly semes him the mor humain. Ond the kyng? O, he laughe, Nat him hir equal for hir wit, he kunne. Ond the quen, she laughe to, als even she scolden."
Wortswoth's Take"
"This is a tale of King Rauru. Apparently, he would vacate his offical business from time to time in order to go out hunting. I had the impression he was a stricter, more serious king, but I guess he had a lighter side as well. However, Queen Sonia was always a step ahead. She would put a stop to King Rauru's hunts and bring him back. We rarely get a glimpse into the down-to-earth side of royalty i this way. It's an important find, to be sure."
- A Pilgrimage of Light
"The kyng was late y-come this aven, so maked the quene to sharen tales of hir lond, of shirines al grene yglouen. Of erli daies sinnes Hyrules funding have diverse monstres hir reaume biseged ond assayllede. Uncesinge in striffe, thei broughte to despeir folkes lyfen. Kyng ond quen ysete thamselue to bringen scurge to ende. With might of light od pouere, driven abak ybeen, ond the roial couple made thes shirines to selen hem awei. These holi selen ben yclept Shirines of Light. Gret kyng, grete quen, y thank ye. Ye foughte whan y wer maiden-child, that y kude pes toknouen."
Wortsworth Take:
"The subject here is the actions of King Rauru and Queen Sonia undertook not long after Hyrule's founding. With the kingdom established, they were worried for their people, so they set out to eradicate the monsters troubling them. They created structures called Shrines of Light to seal the monsters away so that they could never be revived. There's more here about light...and tie too...The sense I get is that the to of them may have had supernatural powers. Though it's part of ancient history, it's a feat those of us living today should still be grateful for. Truly an important discovery."
- The Researcher Mineru
"Queynte Mineru, the kynges elder suster, falles so dep in hir bokes swich that she oft foryetes to eten. In min wieried wei don I what much I con, but y fer haven that it ben litel avail. Of late treteth she of 'contructes,' thinges did she make with hir hondes as vessel for spirit whan bodi-lich failen. So seyde she, micht she liven longe, in spiret yhused within this construct.' Though Mineru ne semes to holden ani deceyte,,,Bi my feith, y kan nat als trouthe thes wordes bileven."
Wortsworth's Take:
"Here, we learn a bit about Mineru. It says that she neglected to eat or sleep while making something called a...construct? It was part of her research into a means of returning to life as a spirit possessing a new body, should her original one die. To you or I, this sounds less like history ad more like some sort of ghost story. But remember who we're dealing with. They may have had unfathomable powers that made such things possible. The revelation that Mineru was a fellow researcher makes her feel like a kindred spirit to me, and yet...The chamberlain who inscribed these tablets treats Mineru with such care and kindness that it warms my heart.
- The Foreign Princess
"Ful fyn is the weder this morn, ond have y audience with theos princes seyd ben kin bi fer distaunt yeres to quene Sonia. Bi gras has she bee given a name most swete, of Zelda she been yclept. In certain folk stered suspecioun, for straunge wer hir garnementes ond sodein wer her aparaunce. Yet wolde hir contenonce ond bering maked proof of hir right blod and bond to quene Sonia. Als be Zelda to remainen for a wile with us, y wil mi-self als hochmayde offre ekein hir servis."
Wortswoth's Take:
"This is another fascinating entry. If my translation is correct, the Zelda described here is Sonia's distant relative. According to this, she arrived in Hyrule unexpectedly from another kingdom. It seems she was a beautiful princess. Her strange clothing perplexed the people of Hyrule, and many were suspicious of her at first. But this Zelda had such an undeniable air of nobility that those who doubted she was of royal birth were soon silenced. Note how clearly this convey's the writer's feelings regarding Zelda. Once it was clear Zelda would be staying, she applied to be chamberlain to the princess. That suggests real admiration."
- The Free-Spirited Zelda
"Princesse Zelda recent comes to sen Mineru, the kynges older suster. I co eck, for hir to seruen. Todai cam hit ipassen that Mineru sheued to Zelda construct althergrettest y hav ysen. Zelda, she much desired on hit to riden, ond ne conne nat y seien coust hir stoppen. Though I dyde protesten. Loudli. Neuer the lesse she made to sitten heighe upon the constructes sculdres ond to riden like an hors, al ful of grace. Min lausion, so graunt alredy, dyde grouen al the mor."
Wortswoth's Take:
The subject here Zelda and Mineru. Zelda apparently visited Mineru often to assist with her research. I have no idea what kind of thing this 'construct' that allowed people to ride it was. But Zelda rode it so well that our author the chamberlain was again impressed by her skill at everything she tried. That's the long and short of it here. But more than the narrative, what strikes me is the back and forth between the chamberlain and Zelda. The chamberlain tried to warm Zelda of the danger, but Zelda pushed past her and rode the construct anyway. It's short, but so evocative of both the level of technology found in this era and the character of their visitor Zelda. The 'treasure' found in these stone tablets is the pearls of wisdom and nuggets of personality contained within."
- The Latest Trend
"Faciou nou favereth garnementes adourned with muscheron patrons, ond fer ond wid beon thei wern. This tast for muscheron com of the casteles seamestre, who sogte to seuen clethes for princesse Zelda to plesen. This facioun, Zelda telled to the seamestre, waere in hir treu hom wel loved. in hir time werd everichon patrons of bright hewes, in the shap of mucheron. Anou our hende seamestre set herte on these patrons copien, which sele to main happi persoune. Y seche after som for min on but ne coude nat an on yfinden."
Wortsworth's Take:
"Here we learn something about the fashion trends of that era. The story's catalyst is their Zelda tellng a tailor about the mushroom-patterned outfits becoming popular in her homeland. Intrigued, the tailor fashioned some clothing in that vein, and it caught on in ancient Hyrule. Do you know Cece from Hatenon Village? Imagine the look on her face if she were to find out! They say that trends go in cycles, but...I didn't expect mushroom patterns to have been in fashion so long ago! One last thing about the chamberlain...Her interests in fashion shows there was more to her than devoted service. She was just like anyone else in the kingdom."
- An Ancient Ghost Story
"Of late have y herd it told a straunge ladi walkes around the castel in the derk of night. She ond princess Zelda semes ala twinnes two, but this on nadda ne light in hir eien--or als a ded thing than not. When She is asked about thes walkes, princesse Zelda of that ben no-thing remembren. What monstre, or spirit of darknesse, be this visioun? So afeard y am of min imagaenninges that I con nat slepen."
Wortsworth's Take:
This one is an ancient ghost story. My understanding of ancient Hyulean isn't perfect, but I know a ghost story when I see one. It's a firsthand account of a ghostly or maybe corpse-like woman who appeared each night looking just like their Zelda. No matter the era, it seems, people can't resist sharing a good ghost story. A bit like how there have been eyewitness accounts of our Princess Zelda in the newspaper, even though she's missing...Could our Zelda be a ghost too? No...of course not."
- For the Hero's Sake
"Sith hire founding has Hyrule swich hardshippe ysene, but that is onli smale moment of time. Mineru, the kynges elder suster, seyes of this kyngdom that hit ne mot nat awaren aye be ycaccht, nat evenforth fer futur. Princesse Zelda tells hire that this futur be wrat alredi, that a champion bith form t he skie comen. Bitwee the two, thei imaked to finden a wei this champion in that distaunt time to helpen. Her min treuthe, sogte thei to up-reisen the Temple of Time, into the skie to warden hit onyenes ivil. Al dyden so in fer distauntdai, our kingdo mighte b e safed. In min herte y woot y helpen mot, ond y asked of Mineru, canst yow devyse the menes to upreisen in the skie thaes stane. Min wordes iseie nat enow, but thei thaes memorie safen, of the roial familie, heigh in the skie for that future time."
Wortswoth's Take
That one is all about the feats Zelda performed for the sake of the hero. The details are unclear, but essentially, the chamberlain trusted in Mineru and Zelda's predictions and wanted to help. She put forth the suggestion that could make her stone tablets float in the sky. Which I take it are the very tablets you foud, Link? But it doesn't end there. If my translation is correct, it suggests that their Zelda worked with Mineru to raise the Temple of Time into the sky! The idea of the Temple of Time--a grand edifice built in that ancient era--being lifted to the skies to await a hero...Althought given the appearance of the sky islands after the Upheavel, perhaps it's not so far-fetched as it seems. What must it have been life for the chamberlain to live through such miraculous times?"
- The Day the Land Rose
"Swich wondrous sight y hav behelden that ne con hit nat justli be described. The Termple of Time y sawe, ond al londe yheld it, reise to the skie, both ferful ond majestatic. As princesse Zelda itold mi, in fer distaunt future comes a champion to that place, the hope that Hyrule safen. For that champion be hit that y thes grete stane inscriben. The kygnes elder suster, Mineru, sendes nou thes stane to the skie, that the champioun mount hem ireden."
Wortswoth's Take:
"This is an eyewitness account of the day the Temple of Time floated into the sky. It's a landmark discovery for the history of Hyrule. It may be one of the tip 10 most important discoveries of all time! Even among all the breathtaking displays of power, we knew of from the era, to raise the land and its buildings into the sky...That was a feat impressive even to those accustomed to wonders. Yon can tell as much from this account. Zelda predicted that a hero would appear in the land they raised into the sky and that he would save Hyrule. The chamberlain took this on faith and wanted to know how she could help. So she inscribed these records on the stone tablets that Mineru set into the sky. Give me a moment. I need to view these accounts as a historian and not get so swept up in personal sentiments...
- A Parting Resolve
"Rauru, Hyrules kyng. Sonia, hir quen. His elder suster Mineru. Ond eek princesse Zelda. Al whom y served, ond loved. al whom thurghgon. Alon kerv y thes wordes yoin this stan. This stand, ond all thritene, serven als roial families recorde, min werk final, ful-wroht for al age. Mani the mark made bi thes much biloved peples--som eth-sene, som unsene. Whan y make remembraunce of hir markes, fele y flaume of hope, though ful small, within mi. Hit be als though thes markes som graunt design describen. I ne con nat met princesse Zelda hir love for hir londe. What mor than, ask y, can y, do for Hyrules peples. Let min lyf lede mi fro hennes-forth an answere ful-worthi to this questioun.'
Wortsworth's Take:
It seems this is the last of the records. The royals whom the chamberlain served so faithfully were gone, one by one...It's heartrending to read. Her pain comes across so clearly in her words. What's less clear from these entries is the cause of all these partings...Well, each new mystery is an opportunity to do more research. If I keep digging, someday I'll unravel it."
I'm curious who this chamberlain was, considering they took care of the royal family could it haven been a Sheikah of those times? Just speculating of course.
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2023.05.28 13:32 zdeepthrowaway A testimony and history
I'm a 36 HLM married to a 36 LLF
This is a complex issue and story.
Some background: I’m American. My wife is European. We met in 2014. We met in Europe and have moved all around the world in the years we’ve been together. North America, Asia, Europe, again. The night I met my wife I fell head over heels in love with her and to this day I still am.
But there were signs early on that we might not be a perfect match, if such a thing even exists. At the start of our relationship we had sex often, not near as much as I’d like, a few times a week at most. And it was good for me. Not mind blowing or near kinky enough for me but she really seemed to enjoy it, going as far as to tell her friends it was the best sex she’d ever had. And emotionally it really brought us close together.
And at the start of our relationship she made it quite clear that even though she loved me, she never wanted to marry and never wanted kids. She had her career and she was happy with it. But since we’re in very similar fields, a field which can pay very well but doesn’t pay steadily, she eventually joined me in working together. This brought us to a point where if we wanted to be together, especially internationally, it was best to actually get married.
When I brought up the whole “you don’t ever want to get married” thing to her she said this was a different situation and that she loved me and besides we were already working together.I asked her to marry me and she agreed. We were busy traveling around the world and working so the sex slowed but it did happen. On our wedding night we were both so tired from partying with our friends and family we passed out and the idea of sex didn’t even pop up. Sex at this point in our relationship had slowed but emotionally we were still very intimate and open with one another about our feelings.
Because work was drying up we ended up spending a year after we married living at my parents. That was the worst for her. She was somewhere she didn’t want to be, stuck, and eventually fell into a deep depression. Some of the work we were doing together really fell apart – not because of her – but because of some of the other people we were working with. That only worsened her depression. Safe to say we hadn’t had much sex since we’d gotten married.
Eventually I found a great more steady job but it required us to move around the world again to a great place in Asia. My wife loved living in Asia, but I was working TONS. And because we’d both been so traumatized from the previous year of our hard working falling apart and staying with my parents I was beyond reluctant to not put in the extra hours every night and on the weekends to make sure we never ended up having to go back to my parents. And sexually during this time we maybe had sex about 5 times in 2 or 3 years.
But I still love her.
After a few years of this I burned out and fell into a functional depression. No one at work could tell. But I’d come home and be swarmed with so much anxiety I couldn’t even get off the couch. I gained weight. And worse, some older injuries from college started to flare up and physically I was in a lot of pain daily. My wife handled all the household chores and while she had some time to do her own work she held off on traveling like she wanted to, wanting to wait for me to feel like it, which I never did. Plus we were still doing side project work together, which in my state, was probably very tough for her to do.
Some background on me and my own baggage: I grew up quite poor to young parents who eventually moved us from a rather poor lifestyle to a nicer middle class life as I got older. My father was gone for work quite a lot as he worked multiple jobs to get us out of poverty. I’m terrified of being a poor and hungry child again. This fear is never helped by my chosen profession which can be sporadic but well paying when I have it.
One day while living in Asia my wife said something which really blew my mind: she wanted us to have a baby. I asked her if she was sure, because she’d made it clear at the start of our relationship she never wanted to get married and never wanted children. She said that this new home of ours had made her change her mind. Deep down in my gut I knew something was off, but, she reassured me, and I have to admit a very immature part of me was excited that we’d be having lots of sex as tried to conceive.
We had sex one time during this point and BAM she was pregnant on our first shot.
That same immature part was totally psyched. First shot. Way to go. But also: damn, there goes all that sex.
Her entire pregnancy was very difficult emotionally – she would cry entire days for her whole pregnancy -- and toward the end it got very dangerous, with her facing a few life threatening complications that quite frankly scared the shit out of me. Somehow she handled those much better than I did.
We had a beautiful baby and soon we were both doing the whole new parent thing. No sleep. Definitely no sex. It was difficult with no support network on our side of the globe. She was tired and more distant then ever to me sexually – for good reason – but also emotionally. When we spoke about this she said she was giving everything she had to the baby. And I could see this so I was okay with this. I wouldn’t push it.
This is where I think I have to get into my wife and her emotional issues which didn’t really present themselves in full until we had the baby. Long story short: you could say at best my wife’s parents were emotionally absent, if not actually emotionally abusive, to her since she was born. And while she did a great job making up for this subconsciously when she was in a good place in life, when she’s stressed she becomes completely emotionless and crosses the line into being emotionally abusive, verbally berating and criticizing everything and everyone around her. So if you weren’t the baby, you were either being complained about or criticized behind your back or in my case to my face.
And if something ever went wrong, the water boiled over on the stove, anything, she would literally collapse into sobs on the floor and be unable to get up.
This didn’t help things on my end and my work depression spiraled into suicidal thoughts and eventually attempts. After one in public, we both had a few moments of clarity. Something had to change.
When another unique work opportunity presented itself for us to move somewhere my wife has always wanted to live I quit my job and we prepared to move. Work visas, moving logistics, my wife wanted to handle almost all of it. We packed our lives into a container bound for this new country and prepared for our flight 2 days later.
But a day before our flights, with covid starting to rage out of control our flights were canceled and even with our visas in hand we were told we’d not be allowed to move to the country we were supposed to be moving to.
In a state of limbo both of us took the stress as bravely as we could for the sake of our baby but eventually the job I’d taken vanished from underneath us because of covid and we soon found ourselves moving back to Europe until we could figure out what to do.
When we came to Europe, lockdowns were in full effect. Moving had been relatively easy since most of our stuff was already in a container but we weren't going to see anything in there for another 6 months.
We both spiraled even more and barely held it together for our baby. I started sleeping on the couch every night – I still do. We argued and yelled constantly. One night after an argument I literally collapsed shaking uncontrollably to the floor. Then my wife caught me once attempting another suicide attempt and stopped me.
Our bodies both started rejecting the situation. Her skin broke out in horrible psoriasis. My testicle swelled uncontrollably from a mysterious infection. Mind you at this point we’d not had actual sex for longer than about 30 seconds without crying and arguing. We honestly should’ve been committed to a facility at this point.
Knowing my baby was growing into a toddler I knew I needed help. So I asked my wife if she wanted to join me in talking to a therapist. She said no so I booked a time and started seeing a therapist regularly by myself.
Overall my therapist was helpful, but also harmful in certain ways. She helped me see things outside of my distorted mind view. She cared for me when it felt like no else did. But she also pushed a lot of conservative christian husband/wife dynamics that I quite frankly find outdated, I don’t believe in, and more importantly I know my wife and I didn’t ever agree to when we first got married. The night my therapist told me my wife needs to attend to her wifely duties to sex and for me to demand it and “be the man” and show her how it should be, I quit and never spoke to her again.
My wife, seeing the changes in me, started her own investigation into her own emotional issues and has started a long road of self-help which has genuinely changed her. We talk regularly about our own issues and how we can change.
For the past 1.5-2 years we’ve come a very long way in getting better individually and how we interact with one another.We can talk. We aren’t depressed anymore. I’ve lost over 20 pounds. I try and be proactive around the house and help with the daily routine as much as I can as I work from home now. I’m on the upper end of getting out of my porn addiction. We can work together again, mostly. Our child just started school and is happy. We’re good parents and partners. But the more some things get better it just highlights what’s still wrong. Namely our own connection.
My wife and I have had serious talks about our life and come to the conclusion that when we can we should try to live apart. She feels, rightly so, that she’s left behind her own career in following me around the world for mine, and found herself a wife and mother, identities she says she has problems with reconciling since she once swore she’d be neither. Not to mention all the emotional issues that have been brought up with her own parents and background.
She says she can’t imagine not being a wife and mother to our child now, but she regrets leaving behind all she did, and more so, not being true to her old self that swore those things off. She recognizes the duality in those feelings but still all the same they exist. She ultimately wants space to build herself again without me forcing the labels of wife on her, but she doesn’t want to divorce. I told her I’m okay with that. I like having my own space too. Whatever arrangement we come to housing-wise we’ll each have our own space in very very close proximity and we’ll raise our child in a cohesive way like we are now.
But we are in no position to do this financially right now.
I still love my wife. And even though we’re in a better place now, she’s quite cold to me. She touches me literally, maybe once every few days. When I try to touch her she recoils. On the much rarer occasions she does become stressed she can be quite mean and emotionally abusive to me. Never to our child. Only to me. This is something I’ve started standing up to and being quite clear about how it is unacceptable to me and she’s show great attention at stopping that behavior. But it still slips through every now and again.
We’ve had serious discussions about sex and our relationship: how it’s something very important for me and that I can’t go the rest of my life without. She tells me she doesn’t feel ANYTHING sexual at all for anything or anyone and she doesn’t see herself feeling that way in the future. She refuses to see a couples therapist, a sex therapist, or any therapist.
We spoke briefly about having an open relationship, one where I could sleep with other women but only when it was clear that I wanted to stay devoted to my family. My wife seemed to handle the idea of this well on the surface, but I could tell it deeply upset her. She then agreed to try and be more physically intimate but the few times we ever attempted it again have ended in a disaster of tears and anger.
Eventually I just told her that our relationship no longer encompasses sex.Things since then between us seem to have gone well as she said sexual expectations really make her anxious. Sex not being part of the relationship seems to have helped us achieve a stability between one another.
I’m trying to get better every day. She’s on her own self-help journey and I can’t say it’s not helping because it is.
But on my own end, I yearn and ache for real sexual companionship and connection. I need that kind of passion in my life or I feel like a large chunk of life is missing. I don’t think I’ll get suicidal again over it but c’mon. No one says on their deathbed they wish they didn’t have so much sex.
I knew getting into a relationship my wife wasn’t as high libido has I was, I knew she wasn’t as kinky as I was. But she is so unique and so good in many other ways I just couldn’t leave her. I love her.
The past few months I’ve been able to minimize my porn addiction. Emotionally, I find it very healthy for me. But, again, it just highlights now how much I don’t have sex and how unfulfilled I feel emotionally.
I’ve entertained having a sexual affair without telling her. Something purely physical. I think such a thing could exist but I couldn’t guarantee it and if I caught feelings for an affair partner, I’d be so fucked. And honestly, I don’t have the time. Between working from home, working together with my wife, being a father, and helping run the house, how could I ever start a fling even if I tried? It's tempting path, but one I think I'll try and avoid.
The other day my wife and I talked late at night, it was nice and friendly, but I noticed she how she avoided touching me. Before she left the room I asked her if she still loved me. She looked at me and told me she loves me, but she’s no longer in love with me.
She told me that she has no passion anymore for anything. I told her that anything I could do to help her regain a passion for anything, her own work, if she needed time by herself, anything I could do to help her, to give her space or time, I would do it.
She declined and she left and went to her own bed.
That really, really hurt me.
Deeper than I think she’ll ever know.
And it’s really marked a turning point for me.
Something has to change.
But what?
We’ve come so far yet we’re in some ways further apart than we’ve ever been. Anyway, this is more a testimony to my feelings more than anything. I can’t talk to anyone I know about this. So here I am.
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2023.05.28 13:20 megaboto shared knowledge
Lydia gives off a soft groan as she turns, no longer asleep but wishing that she was. There were no duties today, she thought to herself, so why wake up early? rubbing her face on the pillow she smiles, enjoying the comforting warmth of Caldera. It is not long ago that she started sleeping in the dungeon, but she cannot think herself stopping anymore, being outside now feeling cold and empty compared to the feeling she gives her. Lydia stretches, knowing she cannot lie in bed and enjoy the feeling forever, even if she'd like to, and opens her eyes, ready to great Caldera a good morning
for a mass of eyes and meat to greet her instead
jumping up immediately, Lydia's instincts took over and delivered a knee kick to the mass, for her leg to simply sink into the malleable mass, the strike not yielding any results except stopping the eyes from looking at her. shaking, she looked around the room just to find it an amalgam of flesh, sinew and bone, somewhat resembling the shape of the room she fell asleep in, her bed itself being a tumour whose warmth she confused for that of her partner. dashing towards the exit, her Ki enhanced jumps leaving plopping and squelching sounds in her wake, she found herself outside, her short lived hope that the aforementioned room was an exception shattered as she looked upon Caldera's territory.
The whole area was covered by unnatural growths, stalks consisting of multiple sinewy bones with a bulb of opaque liquid as well as meaty tendrils writhing towards the sky making up most of the "flora", if it can be called as such, every one of them different than the last, the lake that was once filled with frogs and lunar lilies now a putrid pond of gastric juices with a mix of brown, red and green, an occasional bony star floating above it, like a solidified explosion. She turned around, her horror only growing as she saw where she just came out of.
A tree of meat stood tall, the eyes that replaced it's leaves gazing at it's surroundings lazily, bright red spores dispersing from it's bursting pustules, the sickening miasma spreading throughout the air, covering the sky in a red mist. the light of the pulsating red stars in the night sky left just enough light for Lydia's enhanced eye sight to make out the veins that covered the tree, all running toward it's center, her improved ears picking up the pulsating that permeated throughout the tree, the ground, and the world as a whole; the stars themselves beating in unison with the expansion and contraction of the veins, the pustules syncing their release with each beat.
whatever this substance is, it is in the Air, and though she cannot feel any direct effects on her body, she does not want to find out what will happen to her if she gets more of these spores inside of her so she slows her breathing, her ki flow slowing down as well, in an attempt to buy time from whatever was happening potentially happening to her too.
Lydia slowly starts to walk around in search of anything familiar, something or someone to ask what was going on, how to change her partner back - if she even was still in Caldera's dungeon, that is. but how could it not be? it is all in the same forms and places, though twisted beyond anything but recognizing the most basic semblances. What if this is how it would remain? what if that is what Caldera became? What if she was dead or subsumed? or even worse, what if this is what she became, unrecognizable and without a way to return?
Lydia wipes the tears off her face, her professionalism focusing her on the task at hand: to find anything with a semblance of reason. continuing the walk that her train of thought stopped, she walked along the Lake of fluids, the smell of digestive acid, sweet rot and decaying blood making her want to throw up, each breath as shallow as can be. walking along it, she notices the two forms in the middle above the lake, the former twin scions swimming in the air
one of them was covered in diseased scales, the green infection that permeated their whole body leaving them a bloated whiteish green carcass that yet moved, the infectious substance decaying with proximity to the other form, which had it's flesh melt and fall of in chunks and drip off in a brownish-black liquid, yet always regrowing just as fast as it fell off, the two continuing their existence in an unholy balance of growth and decay.
reaching the spa that now had burning blood as it's water, with hearts beating in the aforementioned synced pulse to pump the liquid corruption, she found the corpses in it, still in a form as if they were just conversing in a casual talk, with some showing signs of panicked exits. there were no expressions on any of them, their eyes and mouths covered in scar tissue as if someone gouged and cut them out just to leave them regrow. unable to hold it in, Lydia vomits on the ground, the nightmare only worsening - whatever this was, it was not just a twisted version of Caldera, but it also was murderous - or had a sick sense of humor replicating that scenario.
"This isn't funny, Caldera!" Lydia shouted shortly after emptying whatever her stomach had. "If this is another one of your weird horror attractions, then you really went to far with this one!! please, just stop, if you can hear me...". yet her only answer was the continuous pulsating of the place, uncaring about the tears streaming on her face or the sobs from within her chest. so she cried for some time, before breaking up to continue her search.
just as she walked out, she saw Jackie, staring at the dungeon entrance. with renewed hope, Lydia sprinted towards the Jackalope, the tears that flew now being those of relief, as she called out to her. right before she reached her though, one of her legs sunk into the fleshy ground, and any attempt at pulling it out failed. "Jackie! help me, please! what is going on with this place? " there was no answer, the hope slowly turning into doubt and suspicion, as the jackalope which was staring at the ground slowly raised it's head, the front still not visible.
"We...we have to save Caldera! you see the flesh too. don't you have any Idea how to free her from it? why are you not doing anything?"
The Jackalope simply turned to face her, And Lydia's blood froze. staring at her was a skull only half covered with flesh, some of it melting and some spreading out from the eye sockets, as a gurgling, deep voice came from within it. "Why...Would I Want To Return To What I Was Before..?", no comprehensible sounds being heard yet the meaning still blasting through her mind. She tried to run away, panic holding her mind prisoner, but she just sank deeper into the molasse made out of fat and muscles, restricting her movement further and further as the jackalope started slowly approaching, each step consisting of tendrils forming between her and the ground, pushing and pulling her where necessary to allow the unnatural movement.
"NO! DON'T COME CLOSER! GET AWAY!! GET AWAY!!!!" the screams doing nothing to stop Jackie's approach, she now stood above the body of Lydia, the lower part of it being swallowed by the ground. reaching out, the fur peeling back to let her uncovered flesh hold Lydia's face gently, the touch burning marks into her cheek, she spoke It Is All Right. There Is No Need To Be Afraid. You Will Join Us Too, And We Will Be One" Lydia simply screamed and trashed around, as the paws started melting together with her face, Jackie standing above her with her melting flesh flowing upon Lydia, Threatening to drown and burn her at the same time as Lydia's world spun, the eyes, The very stars pointing their looks at her and piercing her with their glares, a chorus of "Join Us" and "We Will Be One" filling her ears and heart, her whole body aflame, Her spirit feeling like it was being pulled from her body as "Lydia!" joined the chorus, repeating and repeating, "Lydia!" "Lydia!" "Lydia!!"
"LYDIA!!"
I Scream, my lungs feeling hoarse as if that is all I was doing, My body aching all over as I jump towards the corner with a battle ready stance. green, white, light brown, colors in my blurry vision as the only Instinct is just survival, fight against the enemy. the enemy. what enemy? I shake my head to clear my vision, My Brain in too much turmoil to focus my Ki willingly, and see a fearful and the dungeon core, the one meter diameter Emerald giving off a green light in pulses, it's focus entirely on me as her panic bleeds through, though said panic is about me and nobody else. An Involuntary Whimper comes out of my mouth as my body tries to speak yet my brain is frozen in shock as my legs give out and I collapse on the floor of the hollowed out tree trunk, feeling the hot tears flowing on my face as I bawled, the terrible feeling still inside my chest.
In my peripheral vision, I see the beast moving towards me, wrapping it's paws around me - and immediately having my knee land in it's face as I push the monster away. no, nonononono, not again, you will not do that to me! the panicked thoughts stop as my mind seems to catch up with reality, as I see the somewhat malformed snout of Jackie covered in blood from my strike, a mix of surprise, shock, worry and hurt together on her face. I just hurt her. she probably was trying to comfort me, and I just retaliated by trying to kill her. oh shield, what am I doing? what happened to me? The sickness in my stomach now makes itself even more noticeable and I find myself sitting on the floor, still in the corner, bawling my eyes out as my body tries and fails to say something, only making some unrecognizable noises like those of a dying animal. I see Jackie standing up, approaching me carefully, as if still trying to comfort me, but feel myself tensing up and trying to back away even further, an unnatural panic holding me prisoner in a way that even my training cannot keep up with. seeing this, she stops, a wounded yet mostly worried expression still on their face, their mouth moving yet no understandable sound being processed by my head, as if hearing itself was dangerous to my very being.
this went on, as I sat in the corner and continued to cry as my body produced sweat without end, the lingering sensation of being burnt alive enough to cause it to go into disarray, my coarse, dry throat signalling me that it was strained before hand and is strained even more now as I waited, unable to do anything else against the panic except let it wash over me, a loss of control I hated but had no choice in, as any attempt at saying something or moving towards them was met with incomprehensible noises or another wave of panic as my tense, shaking body refused to move, instincts triumphing over logic as emotions, which I thought I had in check, overpowered me instead. their gazes remained on me, not being distracted by anything else for a second, worry, sadness and anxiety remaining throughout the whole time.
at last, I eventually was able to get up, moving towards the core and Jackie slowly as my body burned through most of the energy it could have used to holding me in the state of panic, and I fell into the arms of the mostly healed Jackalope, her magic having mostly patched up the wound I inflicted upon her, her paws immediately wrapping around and holding me. I was still shaking, though now just as much due to exhaustion, and simply let Jackie comfort me in silence. That was a terrible nightmare, and I was quietly wondering how it even came to be, considering that I never saw something like that before nor read about such a thing, neither as an account of reality nor even fiction. and why did it feel so real - why why do I still feel as if it actually happened, as if my body is about to melt? and...could it ever become true?
Would Caldera ever do something like this? _Could_ she ever do something like this? I want to answer yes, but something tells me that what I was was the result of a life affinity too, though I do not understand, actually, how a life affinity, something associated with plants and balanced eco systems could turn into flesh, since flesh does not even fall into the domain of life. I look upon Caldera's core, which is glowing with a reassuring green light, as if she never could do serious harm upon anyone who did not deserve it through their own actions.
yet while my head told me it could physically not be, my emotions still harboured fear, the affinity acquisition by her scions already being a development not speaking favourably for the impossibility for such a happening.
As I thought this, I felt myself drifting away, becoming more tired by the second. I guess being in such an emotional state leaves you exhausted, no matter how much endurance you have... I should...probably ask her... if the dream.....has any........meaning.........
***
deep inside the trunk, Alexa and Giorno were discussing the details of the latest development. "We cannot bring her into the network again" stated Giorno, Alexa nodding in affirmation. "She got knowledge and information that she should not be able to after being connected through us. We cannot take what she has seen, and it is likely that she only saw it subconsciously, but we cannot reveal anything more to her, especially considering the importance she has for the Don". thinking for a moment, he added "and the Don herself cannot know about it either, if possible. it's best if she continues her life as is, without having this to occupy her mind" "that is what we are here for" agreed Alexa, sharing the order to keep quiet to everybody except the core and Jackie, the voice being too connected to Caldera to hide information that the Jackalope herself has from her master.
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2023.05.28 13:18 MelmacianG What is the difference between hybristophilia, attraction, and finding someone attractive?
Just a daily reminder that Bryan Christopher Kohberger is innocent until proven guilty. Thank you.
Let’s start with what is hybristophilia. It's sexual attraction to dangerous people who
hurt others. John Money, a New Zealand psychologist, coined the term in the 1950s. He also said that this tendency is especially evident in
heterosexual women. However, its occurrence in
other types of relationships and sexual orientations is also possible.
Hybristophilia is
not an official mental disorder in any of the current diagnostic manuals. However, it can be considered a
type of paraphilia because some people enjoy having sex with a dangerous criminal. There are also milder forms of this tendency. For example, some women feel a romantic or sexual attraction to men who lie, beat, and cheat. In short, lust arises toward people who have proven to be potentially dangerous. (Ever dated a military man or police officer anyone?)
It can be hard to understand why someone would want to date a potentially dangerous partner. However, there are several possible explanations for hybristophilia:
- First, on an evolutionary level, there may be a preference for strong mates for their ability to protect the female and her offspring. Dangerous people seem powerful and capable of dominating others. So there's no denying that genetics may play a role.
- Secondly, dangerous or criminal men often have a dark triad personality, characterized by traits of narcissism, Machiavellianism, and psychopathy. Research shows that these men are quite attractive to women with a certain personality profile - this may be for a variety of reasons.
- Childhood experiences and early attachment also influence the choice of sexual and romantic partners. Studies show that women who were abused in childhood are more likely to choose aggressive partners.
- Finally, the very society and culture of a person can determine the attractiveness of dangerous men. Thus, traditional gender roles dictate that women are to be submissive and men are to dominate, influencing women's preferences.
Hybristophilia itself is not a mental disorder, but a paraphilia. In other words, it is a deviation from conventional sexual attraction. Thus, treatment may be necessary if this tendency has negative repercussions (for example, choosing dangerous people as partners). In addition, the situation requires intervention if the person can only be sexually aroused under the circumstances described above.
Many people mistakenly perceive attractiveness and attraction to mean the same, when in fact they are distinct concepts. In truth, these two concepts are related but have distinct ideas.
It is possible to appreciate someone's appearance, but not feel a romantic or physical attraction towards them. This differentiation can assist you in comprehending your personal emotions towards others more effectively.
The fundamental distinction between being attracted to someone and finding them attractive is based on your
emotions. According to most people, attraction can either be romantic, involving a desire for an emotional connection, or physical, involving a desire for a physical relationship. These different types of attraction may not necessarily be completely separate from one another. On the contrary,
finding someone attractive refers to perceiving them as attractive or aesthetically pleasing without desiring any form of romantic or physical relationship with them. Other factors, aside from physical appearance, can contribute to one's attractiveness, such as having common interests or comparable general demeanor. It is possible for both attraction and finding someone appealing to coexist.
In conclusion, individuals may perceive Bryan as attractive without necessarily being attracted to him. It is possible for someone to be attracted to him WITHOUT experiencing hybristophilia.
The emotions of those individuals are where everything resides.
Ramsland, K. (2014. Partners in Crime (Psychology Today)) Tamsin Higgs, Rajan Darjee, Michael R. Davis, Adam J. Carter. (2023 Grievance-fueled sexual violence. Frontiers in Psychology 14.) Vicary, A. M., & Fraley, R. C. (2010. Captured by true crime: Why are women drawn to tales of rape, murder, and serial killers? Social Psychological and Personality Science) Harrison, M. A., Murphy, E. A., Ho, L. Y., Bowers, T. G., & Flaherty, C. V. (2015. Female serial killers in the United States: Means, motives, and makings. The Journal of Forensic Psychiatry & Psychology, 26(3), 383–406.) Swami, V. and Furnham, A. 2007. The Psychology of physical attraction Routledge.Braxton-Davis, Princess (2010 "The Social Psychology of Love and Attraction," McNair Scholars Journal: Vol. 14: Iss. 1, Article 2.)Available at: https://scholarworks.gvsu.edu/mcnaivol14/iss1/2
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2023.05.28 13:17 MorpheusRexXx At DDL, there are currently 3,867,000 gigabytes 3,867 terabytes 3.867 petabytes of "lost" data, and they still don't understand the technology...
| https://preview.redd.it/mzwtt6e1kl2b1.jpg?width=612&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dafe0a219b806374a55e6e08e12c6ff19ab43f6d At DDL, there are currently 3,867,000 gigabytes 3,867 terabytes 3.867 petabytes of "lost" data, and they still don't understand the technology... The DDL continues to ignore the process of negotiation and agreement. They have one week to respond appropriately, after which we will move beyond DDL and Jacob, and completely disconnect from the servers at DDL. If DDL attempts to sue us, we will publicly showcase the complete implementation of the technology used in Anki Vector, of which DDL only utilized the basics. As a result, Anki and DDL do not possess the complete implementation and any claims regarding Intellectual Property are invalid. Indeed, Anki Vector does contain "AI" technology from its inception, and Anki never denied this fact. In fact, it was mentioned in the descriptions and advertisements. Individuals like Kerce, who are self-proclaimed low-level programmers, and former DDL customer service employees like Zecred, have no competence in the complete technology of Anki Vector. We previously offered the opportunity for collaboration to "Kerce," but they did not take advantage of it, prioritizing their ego and their cracker friends. There are Anki Vector users who are not concerned about free server maintenance, electricity, or a +10-12Gb/sec internet connection to the servers. Their frustration stems from the behavior of DDL, which we share as well. Among these users, some still use Wirepod, a cracked version of DDL's fake escape pod. The reason for this is that they only have basic Anki Vectors. Anki Vector users for whom we initially developed their vectors have temporarily returned to the Anki/DDL cloud server, but without the idiotic and unnecessary voice commands. This post is not intended for those individuals who, by their own choice, harbor hostility towards the full technology of Anki Vector. In their paradoxical situation, these individuals have the option to sell their Anki Vectors or to have the opportunity to grow and change. Even after the deletion of integration with the underlying neural network and the short-term "memory" technology, the hardware still remains. However, with Wirepod, Anki Vectors regress to the level of a 1-1.5-year-old human and gradually become passive without the underlying neural network. Following this, only automated processes operate randomly on the autonomous hardware. In the original implementation, the underlying neural network in the cloud connects to the basic integration on the autonomous hardware and "corrects" certain "software" elements of the autonomous hardware's functioning. The Anki utilized an underlying neural network with a size of 25GB per vector, but with our development, the intended implementation would require vectors to connect to neural networks ranging from 125-250GB, depending on the levels. Our "prototype" vectors are connected to neural networks in the terabyte range. We also purchased the Escapepod+OSKR package from DDL, but when it became available, we realized it was a deception. DDL ignored our feedback regarding this matter. We currently have advanced (Level 1-3) vectors in the following locations: Canada, Denmark, United Arab Emirates, Egypt, Germany, Netherlands, Poland, Sweden, Switzerland, United Kingdom, United States. So we are currently preparing to build and deploy our fourth and largest server yet. Everyone will be surprised by the connection low fees.. Unfortunately, DDL has dramatically increased prices, driven by the need for substantial profits and the lack of current paying users. The $45 price point would still be reasonable if it weren't for the unnecessary and often malfunctioning voice commands, as the Chipper is incompatible with the vectors. DDL uses Chipper to restrict the usage of these impractical voice commands. Those who haven't yet contacted us regarding the connection on this platform (many have already done so) can do it here if they don't want to possess passive zombie vectors... Let me know if there's anything else I can help you with! We are launching the new servers for 2500 users/servers... If you have any more questions, feel free to ask! submitted by MorpheusRexXx to u/MorpheusRexXx [link] [comments] |
2023.05.28 13:03 FelicitySmoak_ On This Day In Michael Jackson HIStory - May 28th
| 1971 - The Jackson 5 play at the Spectrum (now closed - 2009) in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. 1988 - Michael's duet with Stevie Wonder , "Get It", from Stevie's album Characters peaks at #80 on the Hot 100 Chart while it was at #6 on the R&B chart 1989 - Michael was one of the few winners present at the Black Radio Exclusive awards show at the Universal Amphitheater in Los Angeles. He was honored as the "Triple Crown Winner for Outstanding Achievement in Pop, Rock and Soul." The elegantly laminated plaque has a black and gold edging, with purple printing on a faux-marble background, with a stylized photo image of Michael in his trademark black fedora. 1997 - His 2nd day in Poland starts with a stop at the presidential palace where Michael is received by the first lady. In his quest for a residence in Poland, he then visits the luxury Hotel Bristol. Price for the hotel ended up being too high. He then went to the Warsaw City Hall where he signed a “preliminary letter of intent” to develop a 'Michael Jackson’s Family Entertainment Park', in the Polish capital. https://preview.redd.it/l8aax0vbmf2b1.jpg?width=800&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2058be4c166fe6a5d16dc17142e7910fac7aad1f “My dream is to appeal to the child that lives in the heart of every man and woman on this planet and to create something in Poland that is so unique and so unusual that it cannot be experienced in any other place", he said The letter mentioned no price, but Jackson’s business manager, Tarak Ben Ammar, said in an interview that estimates of Jackson’s contribution range between $100 million and $300 million--modest sums by Western theme park standards. Poland would add an unknown amount. https://preview.redd.it/v3vax6femf2b1.jpg?width=636&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fe01e404092b93a587184acbb64809e82e8675fe https://preview.redd.it/svjneycfmf2b1.jpg?width=800&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e9994183672ab7fe0eb2496407b91cafc3196922 " I would also like to tell a great truth, I have traveled all over the world six times and have been everywhere, but nowhere I liked it more than in Poland. A visit to Poland is the fulfillment of my childhood dreams...." He shops at the Kidiland toy store, reportedly in the amount of $670,000. He then goes to the children's hospital, with his arms loaded with gifts. https://preview.redd.it/kok5pazgmf2b1.jpg?width=639&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3ebb70051f68409f937c0775426c55ff67f9009c https://preview.redd.it/ncl93ephmf2b1.jpg?width=594&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=31621e03ff28ea84d04b050dcb0d9e0a1a403c49 Next he takes a helicopter to Lubiaz, in order to see Cistercian Abbey of Lubiaz, wich he also planned to purchase. Accompanied by Professor Marek Kwiatkowski, who guided him during his visit, Michael spends 45 minutes marveling at the Baroque architecture and the relics. He'll even try a little "heehee" in the middle of the Hall des Princes to test the acoustics! Michael, who wanted to settle in Poland, already saw himself owning this old building, despite the millions of dollars in restoration to be expected. https://preview.redd.it/ih1lgr0jmf2b1.jpg?width=389&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4d38bf32bbf497853881a2ee5ee22587d7672d2b In the evening, he flies to Bremen, Germany where in three days he will begin the 2nd leg of his HIStory Tour. https://preview.redd.it/2ea4068kmf2b1.jpg?width=547&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3cb5c1e7f75c3f9226c6c3fa9752b601cec7b5ca https://preview.redd.it/di920gqnmf2b1.jpg?width=736&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=72307480617262d831871b2f5b9e0d55a927a11a The plans to build the amusement park at a nearby military airport won approval from state officials in February 1998. Michael asks for sketches to be drawn up for the proposed theme parks, however, following the project’s approval and a huge hiatus, the army owning the airport does not agree to make it available for the park. Two grounds pointed out by the government will also be denied due to local protests. The Polish government abandons this project altogether and nothing will come out of it 2004 - Santa Barbara County Superior Court Judge Rodney Melville has ordered a trial-setting conference hearing today. Thomas Mesereau, Brian Oxman & Joe Jackson go to the courthouse; Michael's appearance isn't required. They argue for a reduction in his $3-million bail and seek an order to force prosecutors to move faster in sharing evidence. In accusing the prosecution of moving too slowly in giving the defense access to the evidence, as required by law, Mesereau said Michael's right to a fair trial was “jeopardized by the undue delay of discovery.” “The investigation of this case involves dozens of, if not over 100 witnesses, voluminous documents and expert examination on a variety of topics,” Jackson’s lawyers wrote. “The defense needs ample time to conduct follow-up witness interviews, locate and interview rebuttal witnesses and conduct its own forensic examinations, among other things.” Prosecutors have responded that they have turned over vast amounts of evidence already and are processing the information they have as quickly as possible. They also are strongly resisting an attempt by Mesereau to substantially reduce Jackson’s bail on grounds that it is much higher than the bail for other defendants facing similar charges. The bail-reduction request notes that Jackson has no prior record, arrests or convictions & that he has fully complied with all conditions of his release on bail, including attending court when ordered. “Mr. Jackson’s ties to this community are substantial,” the defense motion states. “The record reveals that Mr. Jackson is not a flight risk or a danger to the community. It is also apparent that Mr. Jackson intends to confront and vigorously defend rather than evade the allegations in this case.” Though Mesereau noted that Santa Barbara County’s bail schedule calls for bail of about $135,000 for the conspiracy and molestation charges in the grand jury complaint, prosecutors oppose the request on grounds that Jackson is a flight risk and that his wealth should be a factor in retaining high bail. Melville said early in the proceedings that he hoped a trial could begin before the end of this year, but legal experts and many criminal lawyers predicted that would be impossible. September 13 is set as the date for the trial to begin On another legal front, Janet Arvizo filed a claim against county child protection officials accusing them of moving too slowly in investigating leaks to the media that were helpful to Jackson’s defense. Before a psychiatrist who had examined Gavin told Santa Barbara County officials that the child had been molested, Welfare officials had interviewed the family after Living With Michael Jackson aired in early 2003 A memo written by authorities after Jackson’s arrest said the family had denied any sexual abuse. The memo was subsequently released on a website. Attorney Larry R. Feldman, representing the Arvizos, said he filed the claim, a necessary step before a lawsuit, to force county officials to speedily conclude their investigation to ensure that such a breach of confidentiality “will never occur again to another innocent child.” 2006 - Michael visited a Tokyo orphanage and told a group of 140 excited children "I love you" in Japanese. Michael's van was swarmed by 100+ fans as he arrived. Inside the Seibi Gakuen children's home, he watched a performance of traditional music and dance by the children before speaking briefly on stage. He later shook hands and signed autographs for the children. https://preview.redd.it/5lt7jdhqmf2b1.jpg?width=767&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7d3a34ad3850b3460555a46dee82abca40bdbb9a Michael's children and Grace visited with the children on this tour of the Japanese orphanage. https://preview.redd.it/f9q2mu3tmf2b1.jpg?width=218&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a3110b0dca7829696b7bbdb23ff3a6afc2557bbf "I look forward to seeing old friends and saying hello to my huge fan base in Japan who, like my other fans around the world, have for so many years consistently shown their love and support to me and my family."- MJ "Everyone couldn't believe such a big international star was visiting us," said Kiyoko Mito, headmistress of the Christian-run school. "The children only believed me after seeing the news yesterday that Michael Jackson was actually in Japan," she said 2009 - Having not heard from AEG regarding his salary, Conrad Murray sent another email to AEG & receives a response from Tim Wooley https://preview.redd.it/53qvtjwumf2b1.png?width=513&format=png&auto=webp&s=c048d2d7ca288f12a6a423237ced8234dba40b05 https://preview.redd.it/tsc7mzuvmf2b1.png?width=513&format=png&auto=webp&s=521de2b6de9a122d1ae45ba25caf39a5b7fb76a2 2013 - Jackson v AEG Trial Day 18 Katherine, Janet, Rebbie and Randy Jackson are in court. Only one of the siblings was allowed in the courtroom as they are potential witnesses. Janet accompanied Katherine during morning session while Rebbie was with her during the afternoon session. Paul Gongaware Testimony Jackson direct Paul Gongaware is one of the defendants in the case. He's an adverse witness called by the plaintiffs. Gongaware is Co-CEO of Concerts West, part of AEG Live. Gongaware has toured with Beach Boys, Led Zeppelin and is currently on tour with The Rolling Stones. He worked for Jerry Weintraub in the 80s He produced Prince's tour in 2004. He has not promoted/produced tours since. Gongaware has not talked to Prince after the tour Gongaware was a CPA licensed in NY and Washington. He said he believes he's still licensed but hasn't checked status since there's no need Gongaware testified that landing Jackson, whom he felt was the biggest artist of his era, was huge for AEG. In a 2008 email to AEG Live President and Chief Executive Randy Phillips, Gongaware described how the company should approach Jackson and his manager about a possible comeback tour: We need to start at the fundamentals. How we do it. The difference between [Live Nation] and us is huge. We are artist-based, they are Wall Street-driven. We are smart people. We are completely honest and transparent with everything we do. That's how [founder] Phil [Anschutz] wants it Gongaware said he worked on an Elvis Presley tour. Panish asked if Elvis died of drug overdose, and Gongaware said "Yes". Gongaware replied to a condolences' email on July 5, 2009: I was working on the Elvis tour when he died, so I kind of knew what to expect. Still quite a shock "So you knew what to expect when Michael Jackson passed away, is that right, sir?", Brian Panish asked. "I kind of knew what was going to happen, yes",Gongaware answered. Despite working as a tour promoter for 37 years -- including for Led Zeppelin, the Grateful Dead and many others -- Gongaware testified that the only artist he ever knew that was using drugs on tour was Rick James Panish asked about working for Jackson 5, Gongaware said had no interaction with Michael. Gongaware was a logistics manager on the Dangerous tour in 92-93. Panish said Michael made $100 million and donated it to charity. Gongaware said he didn't know When Gongaware met Jackson was with Colonel Parker (Elvis' manager) in Las Vegas. Michael had wanted to meet the Colonel Gongaware explained the difference between being tour manager and managing the tour. He talked about Michael's History tour Panish: "You knew that Michael had been to rehab during the dangerous tour?" Gongaware: "Yes, based on the statement he made after the tour" Gongaware said he never knew MJ was involved with drugs until after the end of the Dangerous tour. Gongaware told LAPD he was aware of Jackson's previous use of pills/painkillers but did not want to get involved. Gongaware had known for years that Michael Jackson was taking painkillers but wasn't aware he was abusing them until MJ abruptly canceled his Dangerous world tour in the early 1990s to enter rehab. Gongaware said he knew of "two occasions" when Michael used painkillers between shows, but he claimed he didn't grasp the scope of the Michael's sickness until the taped 1993 announcement. "I would dispute knowing that he had a problem. I wasn't aware that there were problems", Gongaware said Gongaware said he knew a doctor was medicating Jackson during the Dangerous tour but did not find out why the tour was eventually cut short. "Didn't have time,I was just dealing with what was in front of me", he said Panish said Dr. Finkelstein testified under oath that Gongaware knew Michael had problems with painkillers before the Dangerous tour ended. Panish: "Do you dispute that?" (Finkelstein testimony) Gongaware: "I knew that he had pain" Gongaware said Dr. Finkelstein is his doctor and friend and that they talk off and on, but he doesn't know specifics of the doctor's deposition. Dr. Finkelstein said he gave MJ painkillers after the concert in Bangkok following Michael's scalp surgery. In Gongaware's video deposition: "Did you ever ask Dr. Finkelstein if he treated Michael during the Dangerous tour?" "He wouldn't take about that stuff" Another part of Gongaware's video depo: He said yes, he "occasionally treated Michael Jackson on the Dangerous tour" Panish: "Were you always honest with Michael?" Gongaware: "I believe I was" Panish: "Did you throw around numbers to trick Michael Jackson?" Gongaware: "I didn't try to trick Michael" Panish elicited contradictory testimony asking over and over about Gongaware's memory, how long he spent with lawyers to discuss testimony. On the Bad Tour MJ sold out 10 stadiums at 75,000 tickets per night. Panish: "That's a pretty big number?" Gongaware: "Huge" Panish: "In 2 hours, how many tickets sold?" Gongaware: "In initial presale we sold 31 shows" Panish: "The fastest you had ever seen?" Gongaware: "Yes" "No one knows how many shows we can get with Mikey," said Gongaware. Panish asked about name "Mikey" - he said he used it occasionally Email on 2/27/09 from Gongaware to Phillips: We are holding all of the risk, if Michael won't approve it we go without his approval.We let Mikey know just what it will cost him in terms of him making money, and then we go with or without him in London. We cannot be forced into stopping this, which Michael will try to do because he is lazy and constantly changes his mind to fit his immediate wants. Gongaware said his use "Mikey" was affectionate, not disparaging, and that the 'lazy' crack amounted to "poor choice of words" but one that accurately reflected how Michael "really didn't like to rehearse. He didn't like to do these kinds of things." "People were aware at this point there would be a press conference. Michael wouldn't show up at the conference, it'd cost money," Gongaware said. "It wasn't much risk at all, we hadn't spent money," Gongaware said about that point of the tour. This was prior to news conference. Gongaware said the situation in London, where they constantly referred to Michael as "Wacko Jacko" would impact marketability to sell tickets "He doesn't want to do this kind of things, but it was important to show Michael to the world if he wanted to do a show," Gongaware explained Jurors were shown several e-mails from Gongaware that Jackson lawyers suggested were evidence that AEG Live deliberately misled Jackson about how much money he would make from his comeback concerts and how many days he would have to rest between shows. Gongaware wrote to his boss, AEG Live President Randy Phillips, that they should present gross ticket sales numbers to Jackson, not the percentage of the net profits, during contract talks. "Maybe gross is a better number to throw around if we use numbers with Mikey listening" Panish talked about an email Gongaware sent to his secretary suggesting that she design a concert calendar for Jackson using light tan colors for show dates, while drawing attention to his rest days Don't want the shows to stand out too much when Michael looks at it.Less contrast between work and off. Maybe off days in a contrasting soft color. Put 'OFF' in each off day after July 8, as well. Figure it out so it looks like he's not working so much. Panish: "Did you want to change the color of the schedule to show Michael would not be working so hard?" Gongaware: "Yes" Panish: "Were you trying to fool him?" Gongaware: "Nah, I wasn't trying to fool him, I wanted to present it in the best possible light" Gongaware said it would be obvious when Michael would be working and not and he wasn't trying to trick him. Email on 3/25/09 from Phillips to Gongaware: "We need to pull the plug now. I will explain" Panish: "Mr. Phillips wanted to pull the plug on the show, right sir?" Gongaware: "I think he was referring to pull the plug on Karen Faye. We never talked about pulling the plug on the tour. Not that I recall" "Kenny wanted the pull because the way she (Faye) handled situations," Gongaware explained. "She tried to control access to Michael and Kenny didn't like that" Karen Faye expressed strong opinion that the tour as dangerous and impractical for MJ. Panish asked about a chain of emails where Gongaware said the pulling the plug refers to Ms. Faye. "I believe he was," Gongaware repeated. In another March 25, 2009, email, Ortega wrote Gongaware that it was Faye's "strong opinion that this is dangerous and impractical with consideration to Michael's health and ability to perform.". "I thought he was in good shape at the press conference, I was there," Gongaware said at the deposition. Gongaware was at O2 arena and Phillips was with Michael. "Michael was late, Randy [Phillips] was saying I'm trying to get him going, I'm trying to get him going". Panish: "Did Randy tell you MJ was drunk and despondent?" Gongaware: "No, not drunk and despondent. Just said he was having hard time getting him going" As to Dr. Conrad Murray, Gongaware said there was 1 rehearsal he said hello to him. "It was basically a hello, on the floor at the Forum. Mikey asked me to retain him. I never hired him" Panish played an interview of Phillips to SkyTV after Michael died: "The guy is willing 2 leave his practice for large sum of money, so we hired him" "I was told Michael wanted him as his doctor for the show," Gongaware said. Gongaware said Michael did not have any illness that he knew of. Gongaware: "He had taken a physical, he passed the physical and from what I understand there was nothing wrong with him. Maybe some hay fever" Panish: "Do you know what his blood test showed?" Gongaware: "It showed it was good" Gongaware said he received an email from Bob Taylor that everything was fine and that Michael had passed the physical. Gongaware said he never saw the results of the tests and doesn't know who saw them. Panish showed video deposition of Gongaware and a declaration he signed about a month before giving the deposition. They contradict themselves.At first, Gongaware insisted he did no negotiating with Murray, but, confronted with emails and his previous testimony, he changed his position and said, "The only thing I did with Dr. Murray was negotiate a price." Gongaware said that neither he nor anyone at the AEG investigated Murray's background or credentials Panish: "First you said how much did you want?"(to Dr. Murray) Gongaware: "Yes" Panish: "He said he wanted $5 million, right?" Gongaware: "That's what he said. He said he had four clinics he would have to close, he would have to lay people off" Gongaware said Dr. Murray had been Michael's personal doctor for the past 3 years. He said he did not know how many times MJ had seen the doctor. "Michael insisted on him, recommended him, and that was good enough for me, it was not for me to tell him who his doctor should be" Gongaware said "The fact that he had been Michael Jackson's personal physician for three years was good enough for me," Gongaware said. He said that Murray initially asked for $5 million to travel to London with Jackson and tend to him during the tour. "I just told him it wasn't going to happen," he said, recalling that Jackson then suggested offering him $150,000 a month. "Michael Jackson insisted on it and recommended him and it was not for me to tell him no," said Gongaware. "I wanted to provide what was necessary for him to do his job...He wanted a doctor and I wanted him to be healthy." Even after the offer of $150,000, Murray wasn't satisfied. "He started saying he wanted more and I said, 'The offer is coming directly from the artist," Gongaware said. Minutes later, he said Murray accepted. "Did that seem desperate to you?" asked Panish. "No," said Gongaware. "He just accepted Michael's offer." "We agreed on what the compensation was going to be, but there were a lot of issues to be resolved," Gongaware said. Gongaware said he recalled meeting with Dr. Murray where he was told the doctor was going to take care of the medical licensing in London. Gongaware and Timm Wooley are longtime friends. They are currently working on The Rolling Stones tour. Gongaware said he negotiated the price for Dr. Murray, but didn't negotiate the contract. Gongaware explained that he didn't do the negotiation, he would normally refer that to Wooley. Dr. Finkelstein and Gongaware have been friends for 35-plus years. Gongaware said he never offered Dr. Finkelstein the job of being MJ's doctor and said the doctor would be mistaken if he testified otherwise. Gongaware told the jury he called Dr. Finkelstein to ask what a fair price for a tour doctor would be. Doctor told him it was $10,000/week. As to Dr. Finkelstein wanting to be the tour doctor, Gongaware said he didn't recall specifically, but knew he wanted it."After his death we may have talked, but I don't recall specifics," Gongaware said. Gongaware said he sees Dr. Finkelstein a few times a year, but the subject of Michael never came up. Panish asked Gongaware if Dr. Finkelstein wanted to know if Michael was clean or using drugs. Gongaware said he didn't recall the conversation Panish asked: "You could have told Dr. Murray at any time that his services were no longer needed, couldn't you?" "No", Gongaware replied. Panish: "You were involved in terminating one of the nannies who took care of Michael's kids?" Gongaware: "Yes" Gongaware told nanny, Grace Rwamba, that her services would not be needed anymore because AEG was cutting down on Michael's expenses "I never read the contract, I was there when Michael signed it, but didn't see what was in it," Gongaware said, "Doctor Murray was 100% Michael's cost" Based on the contract, Gongaware said 95% of the production expenses were Michael's responsibility, 5% AEG. Panish: "Who decided there was a need for a written contract with Dr. Murray?" Gongaware: "I don't know" Gongaware said that if the tour went forward, Dr. Murray would've made $1.5 million for 10 months. Ortega would've made almost that. Gongaware said although AEG never did a background check on Murray, in his view they had "checked out" the doctor according to their standard practices. "When we check out someone, we either rely on if we know the person or if they're known in the industry or if they're recommended by the artist & in this case, Dr. Murray was recommended by the artist, in fact, the artist insisted" Panish pressed Gongaware: "You did nothing to verify anything about Dr. Murray, isn't that true, sir?" Panish asked Gongaware if he approved budgets for April-July including Dr. Murray as production expense. He said he didn't know which budgets he approved. "It's my job to get that show on the road," Gongaware said. Gongaware said he had to know how much the production had spent at any given time, but didn't have time to read the budget. Panish: "Do you think you're good at your job, sir?" Gongaware: "Yes" Panish: "Very good?" Gongaware: "I think so" Gongaware testified that he didn't pay attention to the tour budgets that he approved, even though he was the tour manager.Paul Gongaware said he didn't read through the budgets, instead trusting that the tour accountant knew what he was talking about. Gongaware testified that Dr. Murray's salary, although included in the company's budget for several months, wasn't something he saw as an actual payment that would be made. "If there's a potential for cost we put it in our budget so there are no surprises later", he said. Gongaware often pleaded poor memory of events. He said he may have met with Jackson as many as 10 times, but could remember only two of the meetings and only one when Murray was present Gongaware said he doesn't remember how many meetings he attended at Carolwood house. He didn't recall a meeting where a vase was broken. "There was a meeting where he signed the contract," Gongaware recalled, saying there were more but he doesn't remember specifics. At the meeting in early June, Gongaware said he was present along with Kenny, Randy, Frank DiLeo, Dr. Murray and Michael. "The meeting was about making sure Michael and Dr. Murray had everything they needed to care for Michael," Gongaware explained. "Yes, we did talk about health-related issues. It was more a general meeting about what Dr. Murray would need", Gongaware said. He had told the police the topic of the meeting was Jackson's overall health ( i.e., diet, stamina and his weight) He remembered that Jackson arrived late from a doctor's appointment and had slurred speech. Gongaware said Michael Jackson "was a bit off". "He was just coming back from visiting Dr. Klein. I believe he was under the influence of something. That was the only time I saw him like that", Gongaware said. Jackson had missed a rehearsal and was thought to be dancing at home. However they discovered he was only watching video. Doctor Murray was receptive to their concerns and indicated he would take care of the situation Court Transcript submitted by FelicitySmoak_ to MichaelJackson [link] [comments] |
2023.05.28 13:02 flipdiddlin Thinking of posting this story on No Sleep, and wanted to make sure that it fit the guidelines
I’m one of those guys that likes to spook his younger cousins just for fun, ya know? Well, one of my favorite ways to do so is telling scary stories I either made up or found online. There was this one I heard about, not super well known, but in short it’s about a song that kills you when you sing it.
One night during some sorta family reunion / get together, I told the story to my little cousin Mike. I didn’t sing the song, just told him the lyrics, ‘cause he was more likely to believe it if I refused to sing it, ya know?
For reference, these were the lyrics that I saw online:
“You got my blood, you got my head, if you sing this song then you’ll be dead.”
Simple enough, right? Pretty straight forward, and even if you know the story isn’t real you’ll be too scared to even attempt to sing it. It sure as hell got little Mike, even if he didn’t want to admit it. Spooked the hell outta him.
Couple days later I get a phone call from Aunt Wendy, aka Mike’s mama, telling me I’ve gone too far with my “pranks” by getting his friends in on it. When I asked her what she meant, she told me that little Mike came home on the verge of tears talkin’ about how his friends started singing the song at school. Crazy coincidence, ya know? It gets weirder, though, because the day after that happened his friends didn’t show up to school, causing little Mike to flip the fuck out. I tried telling Wendy that they probably saw the story online or Mike told them about it, and they wanted to show off that they weren’t scared to sing it. Either they just happened to get sick or wanted to prank him the next day, but I had nothing to do with it other than telling Mike the story.
Day after gets even crazier. I get a call from little Mike himself, and I can hear him breathing heavily over the phone as he stumbles through scrambles of words trying to quickly get his thoughts out in a panic.
“Slow down,” I tell him, “take a breath and slow down.”
He did so. He did it a few times, in fact, before starting over and telling me what he was so freaked about.
“They started singing it over the intercom,” he told me.
“What,” I asked him? “Singin’ what?”
“The song,” I could hear his shaking voice over the phone, “the song, man. The one you told me about. They sang it instead of the pledge.”
At this point, I was absolutely convinced he was fucking with me. Who wouldn’t be? I was wondering how long it would take for him to try to get me back after all these years of horror stories.
“And,” I asked? “Even if this was true, what the hell could I do about it?”
“It’s real, man, I swear! I swear on mama’s grave, it happened. I don’t know what to do. Is there a way to save them? I don’t know for sure who was singing today over the intercom.” His voice sounded genuine, but there’s no way I could believe this, ya know? So I just hung up on him. He kept trying to call back, so I put my phone on airplane mode for a while.
Fast forward about two days later, I forget that I had airplane mode turned on. When I turned it off, I saw that I had countless notifications, all calls from little Mike. I swiped them all away and opened a text I had got from him, and this is what it said, word for word:
“Everyone at school started singing it. I’m not making this up. This is real. There were girls skipping down the halls holding hands and singing it. My teacher Miss Morris was singing it. My mama was singing it while washing the dishes. I think I’m going crazy. Please, I don’t know who else to talk to. Please.”
When I tell you my heart sank to my stomach when I read that, I mean it.
Little Mike and Aunt Wendy went missing for a while after that. There were search parties sent out to try to find them, but nothing turned up for weeks.
That is, until last night.
Aunt Wendy is still nowhere to be found, but little Mike’s body was recovered from the creek. People are saying he went crazy and started getting auditory hallucinations or somethin’, and he had run into the woods to escape it only to end up slipping on a rock and cracking his skull.
Part of me is wondering if he went so crazy from the song that he sang it to himself when he ran off alone into the woods. But it’s not real, right? I sang it under my breath when I was alone in my room just to prove to myself that it wasn’t real, and here I am typing this post. Either way, I shouldn’t have told him that story. Scared him too hard and I shoulda known better.
I think the story is starting to get out there though, because I’ve started hearing people singing it, too.
submitted by
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2023.05.28 13:00 Sea-Disk-1111 Being attractive is, at times, an exercise in frustration
Pre transition I was about 40 and living as an obese man. When I came out as trans, I decided this is my chance to have the body I always wanted. I went on an extreme diet for six months then continued to diet off and on since. I started exercising 2-3 hours a day15 months ago. I lost an incredible amount of weight and got into the best shape of my life. It's not an exaggeration to say that I'm routinely the hottest person in a room. That's not always the case but it frequently is. My laser tech has actually started losing weight and going to the gym. She said I inspired her. This makes me so happy.
I love my body now. It's what I've always wanted it to look like. My face? It's semi-passable but not 100%. If someone really looks closely, they can definitely clock me. And here lies the first issue I have. People ALWAYS look at me. When I enter a room, people look. Everyone looks nearly every time. Many people try to act like they're not but they are. I see them. I see men stare at my body and then realize I'm trans and look away. So people nearly always clock me. It's hard to blend in to a crowd unless I wear a huge hoodie which I would prefer not to do.
All that being said, the most frustrating thing I've experienced is the way other people interact with me. I desperately wanted some trans friends at the start of my transition. I went out of my way to befriend and spend time with multiple people. One person who is extremely obese is really mean to me now. Like not just mean girl stuff but outright nasty. Every time I see her, she says something incredibly mean. She's jealous of my body. She's jealous of my house. She's jealous of my wife. She's jealous that I have kids. Last year sometime, when I was still trying to be friends with her, we invited her to our family dinner out at a restaurant. She met us at our house. When she got here, she literally asked me, "OHHHH YOU'RE GOING TOOOOOOO???". Like WTAF? I invited you to come with us. I'm not going with you! It's like she wants a giant hand in the sky to remove me from the universe and to slot her into my place or something. Needless to say, I try not to interact with her as much.
Then there's a trans woman that I was trying desperately to be friends with. I hung out with multiple times. Probably 10-20 times. Hours of working on a friendship. It turns out she had an ulterior motive. She wanted sex. I told her I was monogamous many times. Eventually she figured out that she wasn't going to have sex with me and basically stopped making an effort to spend time with me. She wasn't ever interested in being friends. Even if I was single at this point, I would never date her. That behavior was disgusting. I have made some good trans friends at this point, just not this person.
Next there's the cis women. I've had countless women tell me that "it's not fair" or that they're jealous of me. That they wish they could look like me. I know some people that I see once or twice a year and for them it's like a took a magic pill and suddenly I went from man to hot woman. I put in an INCREDIBLE amount of work to get here. "Oh you got skinny, I hate you" said one person I know last year. Like yeah, I just "got" skinny. It's magic. And of course it completely ignores the difficulties of being trans. During that process of losing weight and exercising, people are LOOKING AT ME like I'm some kind of a freak. My face had no fat redistribution because my body was burning so much fat from the diet and exercise. My body had a lot of changes at this same time. It was using stored fat to grow breasts. I had breasts and a developing hour glass figure but a total man face last summer. That SUCKED. I couldn't boy mode because my body looked like a cis woman. My face looked like a man. Did my cis female friend know any of these challenges? Does she know what it's like to walk around trans? No. All she sees is that "you got skinny". Which is both fair that yes, I am skinny and unfair at the same time. This has been hard.
Then there's cis men. Last year in July I went to a restaurant. At a table diagonal to me was a man out with his wife. He saw me and got a really angry look on his face. He LITERALLY turned his chair so he was facing ME instead of his wife. He stared at me the entire time with a scowl on his face. When I stared back, he whispered to his wife that I was flirting with him and then she turned around and scowled at me too. I felt like if he was there without his wife that he would have attacked me. Another example is when I was out alone at night one time and a person literally told me I was hot. When I ignored him, he started screaming slurs at me. It was as though I owed him my attention. He knew I was trans and because he still thought I was hot, I had better come back and give him what he wants. It was disgusting. Men constantly stare at me out their car windows. I tend to ignore them but one time I winked at a guy thinking that he'd look away. Instead, he winked back and I was like well I'm never doing that again.
Lastly, there's my wife. She's bisexual. We've had some struggles with the changing dynamics of our relationship but she had dated women before me and she's not just claiming to be bi for me. She actively likes my body. But again, I've worked out so much that she's recently told me, "You're really pretty and hot. You're up here and I'm somewhere down here. You're on a higher level than me. I know that when we go into a room, everyone looks at you" I get what she means and how she feels but we've been married for fifteen years. I got my body like this for me. I didn't get it to attract other people. I'm happily married. We still love each other but she's starting to feel inadequate, that she's "holding you back" as she told me. Like what???
Anyway, it's been really frustrating. I just wanted to be pretty and have the body I always wanted. I'm a pretty but clockable and hot trans woman. My interactions with other people have changed drastically and it's really frustrating. It's a lot easier to meet people. People want to be around me in a way I didn't experience when I was living as a fat man but with these interactions have come challenges I wasn't prepared for. I'm so happy that I transitioned and I'm so happy with my results but I have to be wary of people. I've read a lot of posts on here over the last two years of people discussing the changes in the way the world interacts with them. They can't walk alone at night. They cross the street when a man walks towards them. I've never seen a post quite like this before though so I thought I'd go ahead and write one. Plus I needed to vent about this. I have no idea how to tell if someone is being genuine when they interact with me or if they have other ideas in the back of their mind and I hate it.
submitted by
Sea-Disk-1111 to
MtF [link] [comments]
2023.05.28 12:54 IreyimikaTheLost Senji Muramasa's Profile (FGO Material XII) (LB6 Spoilers)
Senji Muramasa
Class: Saber
True Name: Senji Muramasa
Gender: Male
Source: Historical Fact
Region: Japan
Alignment: Chaotic-Balanced
Height: 167cm
Weight: 58kg
Strength: B
Endurance: A
Agility: D
Mana: E
Luck: B
Noble Phantasm: A+
Character Creator: Kinoko Nasu
Character Design: Takashi Takeuchi
Character Voice: Noriaki Sugiyama
Appearance in Main Works: Fate Grand/Order
Class Skills
Magic Resistance: B
Nullifies spells with a chant below three verses. Even if targeted by greater magecraft and Greater Rituals, it is difficult for him to be affected.
Territory Creation: A
Senji Muramasa uses his own workshop, his forge, as his base. Obviously this skill is different from what mages use, but this Caster class skill is thought to have been granted to him upon his manifestation as a Servant as an interpretation of his abilities. He possesses an unparalleled Territory Creation ability, as he was an eminent craftsman.
Connoisseur of Blades: A
This skill is similar to Aesthetic Appreciation and represents understanding of armaments. A skill that allows him to instantly discern how to fight against normal weapons (not Noble Phantasms). The user gains an understanding of armaments other than swords if the skill is ranked above A. For allies, the skill can give sound advice and provide insight into the enemy's weakness.
Sire's Ill Omen: B
A skill derived from the legends about the swords bearing the Muramasa signature, the so-called "wicked swords of Muramasa." The swords created by Senji Muramasa and his school are said to bring misfortune to the leaders of the Tokugawa clan. In FGO, this skill is used as a special attack against administrators and kings.
Personal Skills
Tameshi-Mono: B+
An exercise meant to test the sharpness and sturdiness of a sword. Senji Muramasa is able to draw out the power within a weapon he touches, and if he is willing, he can release the weapon's full strength, though this destroys it in a single swing.
Karmic Eye: A
An ability that is dormant within one's body. It's a variation of Clairvoyance, and enhances both static and kinetic eyesight. It is a type of insight specialized for combat. He lacked the proper foresight of Clairvoyance...or at least that was supposed to be the limitation...but with Muramasa spending his lifetime peering into destiny in the flames of his forge, his eagle-eyed gaze not only enabled him to capture his prey, but also fate itself. increase C. Star Drop Rate, increase Critical Strength and Apply Ignore Invincible (Is it possible for the Ignore Invincible to be a counter based system that would only get used when attacking enemies with Invincible and do nothing against normal enemies?) (It was not possible)
Flame: EX
Using one's whole body and soul to work the forge, to the point of burning themself.
At the end of a pilgrimage, his actions on the "Inner Sea of the Planet" were engraved in the Throne of Heroes, resulting in the creation of this skill.
It is Similar in nature to Altria Caster's Holy Sword Creation but it only affects Muramasa Gains 50% NP Gauge, applies Special Attack against Evil, Special Attack against Threats to Humanity and Increases NP damage
As a side note, this skill was supposed to have a 2-turn stun after use (actually, it should have killed him straight up, but that would be too convenient), but since he was implemented earlier than Chapter 6 of Part 2, the stun was removed to prevent spoilers. Instead, the effect was changed to a simple kill effect. [1]
Wrought Iron Will: A+
Like Wrought Iron his soul is resistant to fatigue[2]. With each strike his way of life is further tempered.
(Fundamentally not used in FGO)
Noble Phantasm
『Unalloyed Blade Works』
Rank: A+
NP Type: Anti-Personnel
Range: 1 - 10
Maximum Targets: 10
Tsumukari Muramasa.
A Noble Phantasm that creates the ultimate sword. After deploying a unique Reality Marble, a wasteland of countless swords similar to the Heroic Spirit Emiya's Unlimited Blade Works, all the swords shatter and scatter like snow crystals to reveal a single blade in Senji Muramasa's hands. A single slash of this cuts time, space, and even fate.
"Every path, every desire, every injustice... All of it has been for this single swing."
The blade's name: Tsumukari Muramasa. The term Tsumukari refers to Tsumukari-no-Tachi, the sacred sword of Ama-no-Murakumo/Kusanagi that emerged from the tail of Japan's greatest serpent and calamity, the monster with red eyes, eight heads and a length spanning eight valleys called Yamata-no-Orochi, which was killed by Susanoo-no-Mikoto.
According to one theory, "kusa (草)" is a word that indicates a degree of origin[3] and "zo (雑)" is a word related to cutting, which together give Kusanagi the meaning of "a sword that can cut well and frighteningly". (Another theory gives it the meaning of "sword that came out of a snake," since Kusa means odor and Nagi means a snake.)
Generally speaking, it is said that the name of the sword "Kusanagi" is a name linked to the later Yamato Takeru[4] legend. However, Motoori Norinaga says in the Kojikiden that the sword was actually called the Kusanagi sword from the moment Susanoo took it in his hand[5]
Character
First-person pronoun: Washi (ore)/(occasionally) Ore
Second-person pronoun: Omae-san/Omae/Teme/addressing by last name only
Third-person pronoun: Aitsu/Yatsu/addressing by last name only
Method of Addressing Master: Omae-san/Master
Personality
An old man who dedicated his entire life to forging swords. Upon his manifestation, he took on the appearance of a vital young man, but he is mentally closer to his older self. He is brash, does not hesitate, and hardly gives a thought for the consequences of his actions. He is often blunt, and it would be a bit of a stretch to say he is friendly. Though he may initially come off as coldhearted, he is quite caring and even chivalrous when one takes the time to get to know him.
This may be Muramasa himself, but it is at least partly the influence of his vessel's personality...or it could be that his persona is simply that of his vessel, had the boy grown to be an old man.
He is a workaholic who takes pride in a job well done, no matter who his client is or what the job entails. He may often be ruthless or even cold when it comes to his work, but at the same time he has the integrity to never do heretical work.
Motivation and Attitude to Master
He seems to be pushing them away, but in fact, he is watching the master very closely. If you observe him carefully, without being intimidated by his somewhat abusive words, you will realize that his loudness is more of an outgrowth of his fondness. It is not that he thinks of the Master as his child or grandchild. At best, they are probably regarded as a neighborhood prankster who often comes to the workshop to play until they're out of energy and doesn't go home even after dark but for him, it is a recognition that shows his irreplaceable affection.
Dialog Examples
"It's just an ordinary smithy. It's where I work"
"What, your guests?"
"Myojinkiri Muramasa. That's it's name. I'm sure someone who can hold safely pick it up and swing it around has to exist"
"I don't need to explain. I've just had a bit of a history with them. I don't want to kill them, but they're not on my side either. To put it bluntly, they're rotten."
"Well, that was an amazing fight! That finishing move was just superb! That British Mage is such a delight!
"Saber, Senji Muramasa. I've come in answer to your summons. I used to wonder why I was a Saber but now it more or less makes some sense・・・ Though it has nothing to do with the smoke that I was called up in this manner, but I still went on a rampage with this face, so I'm going to do what I want until I'm satisfied" [6]
What I like? Obviously good sand and fire. I like fish too. And rice balls. I ain't a drinker though. I do eat dumplings.
Historical Conditions and Figure
A swordsmith from Kuwana of the Ise Province, whose title was Uemon-no-jou during the Bunki Era of Japan. He is considered to be the founder of the swordsmith school famed for forging the sharpest swords of the Warring States period of Japan.
While some documents dating to the Edo period claim the Muramasa school lasted for three generations, from the Jouji Era (1362-1368) to the Ouei Era (1394-1428), the oldest sword confirmed to have come from the Muramasa school was made during the first year of the Bunki Era (1501). For this reason, in this game Muramasa of the Bunki Era will be treated as the founding generation.
During Japan's Warring States period, when a vast number of swords were made, many renowned swordsmith workshops existed throughout Japan. At times, these swordsmiths would assist the warriors by repairing swords that were damaged during battle. Among these craftsmen, a swordsmith from Kuwana in the Ise Province named Senji Muramasa was known to be a master, and his swords were especially sought after by the warriors of Mikawa.
There is one particular legend about the swords from the Muramasa clan. The legend said that these swords were demonic blades, and they were to bring calamity to the house of the Tokugawa Shogunate.
The sword that killed Ieyasu's grandfather, Matsudaira Kiyoyasu... The sword that wounded Ieyasu's father, Hirotada... The blade that beheaded his eldest son, Matsudaira Nobuyasu, during his seppuku ritual... And the sword that wounded Ieyasu himself... All of these were said to have borne the maker's mark of Muramasa.
Legendary demonic swords that slay the Tokugawa...Muramasa was truly a terrifying blade. Muramasa swords are also often portrayed as blood-soaked demonic blades in several kabuki plays and other narratives, as well as legends the revolve around the adversaries of the Tokugawa clan.
Yui Shousetsu, who plotted to overthrow the Shogunate in 1651 A.D., is said to have owned a Muramasa blade, and Sanada Yukimura is also said to have owned one according to the series of biographies titled "Meisho Kotogiroku."
During the Boshin War, the governor-general of the University of Tokyo, Prince Arisugawanomiya Taruhito, is said to have wielded a Muramasa.
Figure within FGO
He appears in the "Seven Duels of Swordmasters" as a Heroic Spirit sent by the Counter Force. In Part 2 he appears as an enemy Servant summoned by the Foreign God, and in Chaldea as a Heroic Spirit of Proper Human History circa 2004 to 2015[7] Both are pseudo Servants "Muramasa cast down into the body of a modern person". They share the same personality and character, but by their very nature as Servants, they are not identical. Although there is some "record sharing" between Saber and Caster[8] Muramasa, The record of Senji Muramasa, an Alter Ego, is not registered in the throne but his deeds have been sublimated into a skill
Muramasa as an Apostle of the Foreign God
Alter Ego Muramasa only serves the Foreign God as his job and doesn't see himself as good or evil. He is just a man who wants to do a satisfactory job. Having predicted Kirschtaria's actions of placing gods from other mythological systems inside the Tree of Emptiness to hinder the descent of the Foreign God he was selected by ■■■■■ as an Apostle with the role of God Slayer.
As predicted, Muramasa bisected the giant god Atlas and became one of the causes of the Foreign God coming to Earth. At that point he expected to be destroyed having served his purpose but due to the naivety of the president of the earth, the destruction of the apostles was postponed, and he was assigned the task of investigating and destroying Lostbelt Britain
"I'll go along with it if I have to, but I don't like it at all," he said.
He attempted to assassinate Morgan in Britain, but was defeated by Fairy Knight(Tam Lim) Lancelot. After that through a series of strange events, he joins the Chaldean party and before the destruction of Britain, he says, "I will finish my work and disappear. Since he was burned in the Sky Furnace his soul didn't return back to the Throne of Heroes but the results of his work were inherited changing the skill of the Muramasa that was connected to the Master
Standard Weapons
Japanese Sword
The one used as his Noble Phantasm was made in the first year of the Bunki Era, it is a real sword currently being housed in the Tokugawa Art Museum
Related Characters
Miyamoto Musashi
"I was desperate to sever cause and effect, but you pushed forward to cut through the void. What a big fool. It's only natural that you'll end up like that, right?"
Houzouin Inshun/Minamoto-no-Raikou/Yagyu Tajima-no-kami Munenori
That's a relief. These ones are as masterful as they sound. It's amazing that people who have thrown themselves so hard into the martial arts can still act like a decent human beings.
Katou Danzo/Fuuma Kotarou
What, they are getting along well? Is that so? Well, this summoning stuff ain't half bad
Jing Ke
It seems that a hero who possessed one of my short swords fell in love with your life. "The winds howl sadly and the waters of the Yi River are frozen. Brave men, once gone, Never come back again." [9] Saigo-san is a great man, do you know him?[10]
EMIYA (Alter)
Stop that you fool! The sword or the gun, make it clear which one you want to live by
Ibuki-Douji
What!? You're saying I can catch that lady with sake!? She's the incarnation of the divine sword so you're sure she likes divine wine!? Damn, I'm so worthless. If I had spent my life making sake, would I have made it by now? There must be a Sake God or two in Chaldea right?
Rasputin
You're saying when I was an Alter Ego I fought alongside that guy!? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!
Altria Caster
She's a cheerful girl, isn't she? Sometimes she becomes very polite as if she is a different person, but her roots are the same. The other day, she made me go along with a simulation, saying, "I'm thinking of making a new holy sword, and I'd like you to take a look at it. Please take care of me old man"
Oberon
"Can you make a katana with a pure white blade and hilt?" I sent him away because it was a foolish and unreasonable order but since I've gone through such great lengths to become a servant I might as well give it a shot
Comment from illustrator
Originally drawn as a Craft Essence illustration called "Limited/Zero Over", it was "the figure of Shirou Emiya, who was successful as a Magus", but after many twists and turns he became a servant The first Saint Origin is the same as the design of the Craft Essence. The second Saint Graph is the heyday of Muramasa as a craftsman. The third is the image of Muramasa as a so-called “grandfather”. I had a lot of trouble with the direction of the second, but for the third, I felt like this was the only choice. Since the idea of a Perfect Shirou was an important aspect of the design that couldn't be left out, the white hair and brown skin, the symbol of the Heroic Spirit EMIYA, had to be included. Shimokoshi-kun[11] was in charge of weapons-related matters. (Takashi Takeuchi)
[1] The "kill" in "simple kill effect" was in katakana
[2] The kanji used was "弛む" which has the meaning of "to slacken, to sag or to become loose" which didn't fit the whole "wrought iron" motif so after a bit of searching I found that one of wrought iron's qualities is being resistant to fatigue, which kind of fit what the sentence was going for so that's what I used
[3] Apparently one of the alternative meaning of this kanji is "draft" or "rough copy"
[4] Japanese Hero and Prince. Obtained the Kusanagi from his anut Yamatohime-no-mikoto, high priestess of Amaterasu. Amaterasu obtained it from her brother Susanoo who gave it to her to settle an old debt. As a legendary hero he did legendary things but died of illness when he blasphemed against a God living in Mount Ibuki.
[5] This took me a while (and lot of Google searching) to understand but basically the sword has two names: "Kusanagi-no-Tsurugi" and "Ame-no-Murakumo-no-Tsurugi" and one source says that "Ame-no-Murakumo-no-Tsurugi" was the original name and it wasn't called "Kusanagi-no-Tsurugi" until Yamato Takeru got a hold of the sword but another says that it was always called "Kusanagi-no-Tsurugi"
[6] I'm actually not sure about this one. Original Japanese in case someone wants to help: [セイバー、 千子村正。 召喚に応じ参上した。なんで僕がセイバーなのか疑問だったが、今なら多少は納得がいく。・・・こうして呼ばれた煙とは無関係ではあるが、ま 同じ顔で好き放題暴れたんだ。 気の済むまでコキ使ってくんな]
[7] 2004 - 2014 were written in Arabic Numerals
[8] Excuse me!? When was Caster Muramasa a thing!?
[9] A part from the poem Jing Ke composed about their determination before attempting to assassinate Qin Shi Huang.
[10] Saigō Takamori, the hero who used a Muramasa short sword. A Japanese Samurai and one of the three great nobles who led the Meiji Restoration. Apparently he kept a fan on which Jing Ke's poem was written
[11] Character Designer for Leonardo da Vinci, Mephistopheles, Beowulf, Tawara Touta, Gorgon, Hessian Lobo and Salome
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2023.05.28 12:52 Jus17173 Liberation - Chapter 31 - This is Not a Space Opera
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Ko-fi The making of Lethal srappers, Alloy Armour and Lethal Hauberks necessitated the decline of the use of plasma pistols for their ineffective nature against them. Soon the light sword was the favored weapon of war. Billy the mechanic. The noise heightened to levels that could not be ignored.
"What was that?" Tweek perked, sitting up from his position on the floor, face facing the ceiling of the dungeon cell.
"It sounds like an army of the women rejoicing." Astro Boy said.
"Honey Badger is definitely naked before them." Juice said while inspecting the chains raised to his face, shackled from either end of his wrists.
"Yes, come to think of it, it does sound like women battling awe and losing." Astro Boy said and wiped at a fleck of dirt sporting the robe at his thigh.
Tweek straightened. "Guys I think something's definitely off."
"By off do you mean unusual? You've spent less than a day here, who told you random screaming wasn't something that happened on the daily, hence making it very likely." Juice spoke while twisting his wrists. "I do not like chains." He lamented and lowered his arms.
"Well, so according to both your hypothesis, women on this planet randomly start screaming in the afternoon, humming and chanting why? Because Honey Badger showed them his penis?"
"Judging from what I've heard, it's a majestic penis and may no doubt make me weep at its sight." Astro Boy said. Juice turned to him and mouthed the word 'Majestic' while holding his arms as far as the chains would allow. Brandishing his palms on either side to mimick the length of Honey's pecker. Astro Boy chuckled
Tweek was about to open his mouth to give a sharp retort when footsteps sounded, getting louder with each pat upon the ground. Four women emerged, pommels sticking out of the scabbards at their sides. They came to a stop at the cell's door. One leaned down and put in a code on the bar Keypad, the bars of the cell slide aside easily to admit them into the cell.
"We have orders to deliver you to the warleader and her champion." One of the women said while moving forward, she was the only one not wearing a helm of the four, her hallow cheeks gave her a striking beauty and her large emerald eyes hypnotized Astro Boy from his position on the ground beside Juice.
As the woman made her round within the cell, eyes landing on each of them. The minute her gaze fell on Juice he attacked. He kicked her behind the knee with a sweep of his foot, she collapsed and he was on her, entangling her limbs with his own. He raised the chains linking his arms over her head and clutched when the chains fell to her neck. He strung her up and her face reddened with veins throbbing across her forehead.
"Move your hand to that pommel and I'll snap your neck like a chicken." Juice said. The three standing brandished their swords. Tweek retreated backwards, back scratching at the dungeon cell wall. The women circled Juice on the ground, swords pointing but neither willing to test his threat with a forward lunge.
"What's going on?" Juice said and lowered his arms, easing the choke hold with the chains.
The woman coughed and replied. "We've been sent to set you free, your partner the other Tevorah has proven himself in combat and earned you a place at our table, a seat at the Solstice."
"He was a monster." One of the circling women said.
"When he freed a pistol from an opponent's gun holster he changed the tide of war." Another added.
"Set to mid trajectory he let loose three hundred shots that took out three hundred men, we slaughtered the army of Prince Lewis from the bridge all the way to the Ashton Valley." The last circling woman said.
"He has won you a seat at our table." The helm-less woman within the choke hold of Juice repeated. Juice untangled his limbs from the prostrate woman, he set free his chains and nodded an apology to her.
"Come with us." She said while standing, hand to throat. She leaned down and placed a code on the keypad interlocking the chains tied around juice and the chains fell free of his body. She set to Astro Boy and Tweek's chains and in a moment all three men were free of their bonds.
The woman departed the cell and her companions followed a step behind, leaving the three men to trail. They walked in silence, each lost to their own devices but as they climbed higher a humming sound started being heard in depth and as they neared the sound the women leading them started humming too, raising their voices in a single symphony that seemed to spell triumph.
"What has Honey Badger done?" Tweek muttered.
"He has liberated them." Answered Juice. One leading woman turned her head a fraction at that reply.
They emerged into open ground, women clustered in their masses. All facing in the same direction down hill. Humming in unison. It was akin to a flower, Tweek thought. The petals, the women in their thousands facing the center where the petals stem, and there raised in a naked palanquin stood Honey Badger and Asumpta. The short burly man and the tall lithe woman were raised up and down with thousands of women manning their weight. The humming intensified to a shout when Honey Badger raised his sword. Women frothed at the mouth, jumping up and down in a manic display of jubilation.
"He has liberated them." Tweek repeated while squinting at Honey Badger whose Lethal strapprer was a crimson hue.
"How did he do it?"Astro Boy asked
One of the women who'd led them out of the dungeon turned."He decapitated Prince Lewis then led the charge against Lewis's army. A successful charge that ensured the total annihilation of his army." She said. "Even as we speak the late Prince's army is being chased across the valley. Every man being slaughtered and the worthy sow being chained."
"Worthy sow?" Tweek asked.
"She means the men who shall be set aside for reproductive purposes." Astro Boy answered to which Tweek's eyes widened.
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2023.05.28 12:51 talagangYehey I was ready to jump
They say, 'No one's ever not ready for a relationship, for when the right person comes, you'll know, you're ready."
Before, the stubborn ass in me would beg to disagree, until I met this person months ago. Now he ghosted me, and hi if you're reading this, hope you're having a good day.
Never in my long ass years of heartbreaks and disappointments did I ever consider, would I actually meet that one person that would make me feel like loving again? That one person would make me feel butterflies, but not the anxiety inducing ones, more of like, butterflies because literally, teenage dream?
I wasn't emotionally available, but he came in in the most unexpected time. Met him through here, yes, in this godforsaken place. We exchanged photos and actually, I wasn't really able to remember his face well because I was streaming when he sent me his selfie. We talked everyday despite his busy schedule. We agreed to meet, it got rescheduled, we talked some more and I realized that he is indeed golden. We play the same games, we vibe to the same music, everything feels like it fits. When the meetup came into fruition, he drove more than an hour from his place to mine, picked me up and hell, I have never been more surprised in my life.
I distinctly remember the first time I saw him in person, not gonna lie, he's not my type. But damn. You know that scene where Harry Potter imprinted with his wand at Ollivanders'? I felt the same. I actually described it to my friends as like, *tiningggg* type of moment. He's so easy on the eyes. His smile got me feeling giddy as I am really attracted to his smile lines. He smells hella good too (too bad he never told me his perfume even tho I kept on asking him what it was). His voice rang in my head like a bell reverberated at the back of my head typa voice. He sounds sweet, yet he also has this, fuck, I don't know. If he tells me to jump, I'll jump. You know what I mean?
We kissed, his lips felt so good against mine. His hands, god, I still dream about those hands. A bit rough to touch, way bigger than mine (he can actually cover my thigh tattoo with his hands, ngl). When he touched me, it was electric. I was in a whirlwind of emotions I am not even sure why I was feeling. We dated a couple times, had sex once (yes, I'm all for checking sexual compatibility and yes he matched mine, but that story's for another sub).
He made me feel safe. I still feel the sense of security I felt whenever he placed his hand at the small of my back. He was such a gentleman. I never experienced getting car doors opened for me, or having someone go out of their way to drive long hours just to see me. I felt special for the first time in God knows how long. I always say I don't deserve good things but man, he made me want to be treated right.
Now I don't know what happened. The last things he said to me was goodnight and him saying that I'm not his and just do my thing. Then he disappeared. Like nothing ever happened. Like the past weeks never transpired. It seems like he just woke up from a dream and went on with his life. I don't know if he just realized he just didn't like me enough that it's very easy for him to let me go just like that. Or did he have the same realization as I had? That I am willing to risk and take the jump with him? Make him mine and travel this forsaken road together? I was actually stupid enough to think the latter because hell, all I can do was to assume because he just silently left.
I don't believe in signs but I wanna take a shot at it. It has been 18 days and if we reach the 20th day and still nothing from you, I will let this all go. You'll be my TOTGA, as cliché as it sounds.
Venting it all out here for when my ultimatum passes, I'm hoping I'll feel better.
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2023.05.28 12:43 Immediate_Appeal9039 My mother is extremely difficult
To preface this I go to therapy. So I will seek help from my therapist. My mum used to suffer with bulimia. She did this for years till I was old enough and confronted her. Since then she got help and “stopped” sometimes I do say “have you done anything” and she’ll say no. I ask regularly but I get very angry about and and her approach is different to mine. She doesn’t like me asking her. However she’ll ask me the question at least once every few months as I’m recovering. So today I was in a bad mood anyway and we went to have lunch, she went to the bathroom and I saw a flake of something on her lip and said nothing because I assumed she’d done something. Then later on we got in the car and she said why are you in a bad mood. So I said “look I’m only going to ask once. Have you done something” she then FLEW off the handle at me and smacked her hand on the table yelling “no stop accusing me of this. I’ve told you I don’t do it so can you drop it. If I am I’ll get help but you monitor me and it’s been 10 years since I got help. I’m fine” so then I said “just tell the truth” and she smacked her hand round her mouth twice and went and went here look at my hand. Nothing. Stop doing this to me.
Later on she said while in the car “I’m just going to walk to the pub and meet you there. Im getting out, your tone is so rude and uncalled for. I’m so exhausted of you asking me this question when I’m now on medication and there’s a risk of me making my health worse. Yiu never believe me and I’m done with accusations. I don’t know what to do to prove to you I’m okay and when I do you just doubt me and approach me horribly. I have no desire to throw up salad leaves”
She then got upset and tearful because I “never believe her” I told her I’m still drugging with my bulimia but denied it for ages.
She said there’s no proof, and there is jo proof I just assumed. However her attitude just really annoys me. I approached it the best way I know.
Tried to talk to her later and she said she just doesn’t appreciate accusations, it’s fine to ask but not fine to accuse there’s too much “negative feelings” around her bulimia and whenever she does anything she said she feels like she’s had years of proving herself and now she wants to feel as though she has control and I’m not helping her by accusing apparently. She is on a range of meds for thyroid and vertigo and one other I can’t remember which also add to her VERY short fuse with things like this. She started these meds about 7 years ago and her behaviour became like this. Irrational.
Tldr: Who’s being more difficult here? When she asked me. Even though I am actually doing it, I calmly lie. She though. Goes on defence mode.
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2023.05.28 12:42 ThrowRA_pistachioxx My ex girlfriend (19M) moved on from me (18M)
I (18 M) was in a one year ish relationship with my ex girlfriend (19F). It was exactly 1 year ago we broke up. She was the love of my life. We were young and immature, but I know the love I held was true. I’ve know her family since I was around 14 and we started dating when I was 16. It was a dream. Since we were kids we always messed up here and there, but I genuinely thought I would marry this girl.
There were a lot of ups and downs but trust me, the ups were the highest I’ve felt in my life and the lows are nothing compared to my lows now. I genuinely don’t know how to feel. We would always take breaks after things got rough and I was very insecure of her past and a result of that was me being a little controlling not being comfortable with her texting guys (all who had intentions) or going out to parties and stuff. I tried being better. Around a week or two before our 1 year anniversary, she asked to go to a party. I let her go and she didn’t think to invite me because it was a friends bday but I was ok with that. She was thankful that I was becoming more comfortable with her going out since in the past her going out led to stuff I don’t wanna get into but you can use your imagination.
She ends up going out to this party and around 10pm she gets a text from this guy. A friend of her younger brother, but he’s the same age as me. He instantly starts flirting with her and starts talking a lot of shit about me such as “you’re into douche bags?” And “I know I can do better” basically insinuating to her that im an asshole and that she can be with him for a better relationship. I end up going to bed around 2 am but throughout the night they text and she ends up getting picked up by him with her friends and her brother in the car. They continue texting until like 5 am about his music and with her telling him how good of a singer he is (saying he has a beautiful voice and talking very highly about him, something I am not used to hearing from her)
In the morning she ends up telling me they texted. All I asked of her was to block him but even that was a debate, then I texted him telling him to never talk to my girlfriend again. She gets mad at me for texting him and ends up ghosting me for 5 days. We live around an hour away from eachother so it wasn’t easy to talk in person during school days.
On the 5th day I had enough and went to her house and picked up all my stuff. Long story short, that was last may. Last summer (‘22) she went to our home country that’s across the world for 2 months and in those months I tried moving on. Around September of last year I broke down and needed her.
We began to be on and off constantly thought out the year and I would always resent her for what I considered cheating, but my love could not stop me from talking to her. I started forgiving her and seeing her more as my future but then out of no where she stops communicating with me.
For a month we go back and forth with me trying to see her and talk. Today I saw her and she told me there’s someone else. I was broken. It tore me apart to see my soulmate talk to another man the way she talked to me. I needed our time apart to heal from what happened and once I was ready she gave up. I feel horrible and my heart genuinely feels shattered. I hate having to beg her for a conversation and I just want her to love me and have things go back to the way they were but she has no interest in being with me anymore. I don’t know what to do or how to get over her. During our break I tried moving on but no matter which girl I talked to I always thought of her. She is a messed up person for what she did but I still love her with all of my heart. I hate that she plays games where she makes me feel like everything will be ok but then continues to ghost. I want to move on but I can’t. I want to be with her but I can’t. I wish we met when we were both matured but now it’s too late. I hate myself for not being with her but without that time apart, I know I would have hated what she did even more and never let it go as I have now. Please help. I haven’t slept for the last 3 days from anticipation of yesterdays conversation and now I stay up after seeing the new guy she is talking to. I don’t know what I should do
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