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I stared up at the magazine cut out of a Maxim model that was crudely pasted on the underside of the top bunk. Her pert breast shimmied ever so slightly as Pete tossed and turned above.
She was platinum blonde with legs long enough to wrap around me twice. Or so the camera angle made it seem. I felt a stirring below, that yearning for a woman’s touch… which I hadn’t felt in six years, three months, and eleven days.
I rolled to my side, stifling it. It was the wrong time to seek out an orgasm, and I knew after the release I’d just spiral into self-loathing anyway. I focused on a crack in the cinder block until my eyelids became heavy.
Static pushed the thought of women from my mind as I slipped into sleep. The smell of cigars and oil flitted through my mind in a memory. My dad’s repair shop. The one I was meant to take over, before the arrest…
------
“Aaaarrgghh!”
A cry echoing from somewhere deep within the prison startled me awake. My heart thundered in my chest like a rabbit thrashing against its cage.
I rolled over to see Pete crouching low, his face pressed against the bars.
“What’s going on?” I croaked.
“They’re taking Benny.” He whispered.
“Fuck, really?” I pulled myself to the top corner of my mattress, just enough to peer around the edge of the bars.
Two guards wrestled the young latino onto a gurney as a man in a lab coat watched from a distance. He fought against them but it was futile. Once the straps were locked in he screamed once more, pleading for help.
Dozens of eyes watched from dim lit cells, none of which stirring to offer assistance in the slightest. We knew there was no helping him. We knew what happened next…
His cries were muffled as the doctor jammed a syringe into the base of his neck. Benny’s muscles tensed and pulsed in the fit of a seizure, but then lay still. The cell block was silent once more as they wheeled him down the hall and into the catacombs.
I did a cross over myself but didn’t bother to pray. Once they took them, they never came back.
“A damn shame…” I muttered.
“Yeah, he was a good kid…” Pete stood and leapt back onto the top bunk.
A fire burned in my chest. I wanted to say something. To cry out about the injustice of what was happening to us. That committing a crime shouldn’t damn a man to whatever terrible fate they had instore for us below three feet of steel and a quarter mile of dirt.
But I didn’t… What good could it do? Other than drawing attention to me in a very negative way.
Once they took you to the lab, you were never seen again.
All you could do was hope that your number was never called, and that you got out of here before they visited your cell late into the night.
—-----
87…88…89…90…
My chest was on fire as sweat dripped from the tip of my nose. I couldn’t go back to sleep last night. Kept thinking about Benny.
91…92…93…
So began the push-ups. It was the only way to clear my head.
94…95…96…
My therapy.
97…98…99…100.
I rolled to my back, out of breath.
Three years, six months and change.
So much time left to go.
Benny had only been here for a little over a year. It made no sense…
None of us could figure out exactly why they took who they took. There seemed to be no method to the madness.
Just a couple weeks ago they took old man Tom Finch. He’d been here longer than any of us. A lifer on the account of premeditated murder back in the 70s. But they didn’t come for him until he’d served most of his adult life behind bars.
The red beacon suddenly swirled above. A buzzing sound hummed as the cell doors clicked and slid open.
Breakfast.
—----
I pulled my tray along the bar to be loaded with oats, powdered eggs and bread.
Meager rations.
I grabbed a small carton of milk and made my way over to sit with Pete. He was already nibbling on his toast while perusing a crossword puzzle.
We exchanged nods and I went to devouring the entirety of my plate.
Calories build muscle after all.
Which was something Pete had no interest in. He was a bookworm through and through. Rail thin too. When we’d met, I’d assumed it was from the drug problem he’d had on the outside, which ultimately landed him in incarceration. But come to find out it was just his metabolism and general lack of appetite.
“John…” He whispered.
I looked up from my feast.
He was looking to the corner of the cafeteria and I followed his gaze to see two men in lab coats surveying the crowd.
I grunted and squeezed the handle of my fork until my knuckles went white. The impulse of burying it into their throats was almost overwhelming.
“Their activity has been ramping up.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’ve been seeing them much more frequently as of late. They must be close to a breakthrough.”
“Breakthrough of what?” I furrowed my brow.
“Who knows? Whatever it is they are doing down there. They’ve been taking us more often as well.”
Pete sighed at the twist of confusion on my face.
“Think about it… Benny last night, then Tom two weeks before that. Then Eric ten days before that, and Deonte maybe three weeks prior. It’s never been that close together. Until recently, they only came perhaps once every other month. Sometimes only once a season.”
Shit… he was right. I hadn’t realized it before.
“So what does that mean?” I asked, shoving another hunk of egg into my mouth.
“I have no idea. But I’d say our odds of survival have been reduced dramatically.”
—-----
Pete might as well have been an oracle, peering into our grim and desolate future.
Over the next several months we started seeing the lab coats weekly. Sometimes even more often than that.
The prison yard felt empty. Sure there were still plenty of us left, but our population had been noticeably trimmed. One gang in particular only had two members left, which didn’t bode well for them. The others slowly circled them like sharks. I had no affiliation with any of them and kept to myself. But still, I could see their fate a mile away.
Although, despite the business as usual dog eat dog atmosphere, there was an undercurrent of fear rippling through the general pop. You could smell it, like a scent of decay and desperation. Hard faces that had once promised violence, now almost flinched around every corner and jumped at each shadow.
The energy of a couple of hundred men that felt like an animal backed into a corner was palpable.
But what could we do?
I didn’t know but I sure wish someone would tell me… I threw myself into my workouts and Pete hardly ever looked up from a book. Escapism was our only reprieve.
I went to bed with a prayer on my lips, hoping I wouldn’t hear those iron bars moving in the late hours of the night.
—-----
A loud clanking followed by footsteps pulled me from sleep.
I squeezed my eyes tightly shut hoping it was the cell next to mine.
But it wasn’t…
Three guards hovered behind a fourth that was unlocking our cell. The bars clicked and began to slide open.
I jumped to my feet and backed up against the wall. I pulled my fists up into a boxing stance, I wasn’t going to go without a fight. My muscles tensed and flexed like coiled steel.
“In the corner inmate! We’re here for your cellmate.” A short and stocky corrections officer barked with his hand gripping the baton at his waist.
Pete squirmed into a ball at the corner of his mat and looked at me with wide, pleading eyes.
I put my face in the opposite corner as instructed. A mixture of fear and relief roiled in my gut, and I hated myself for it. It made me feel like a coward.
“No, no, no, no, no!” I heard Pete squeal from behind as guards flooded the cell.
I peaked over my shoulder and watched as they pried him from the top bunk. Pete tried to resist, but there was nothing to him. A bag of bones that they easily wrestled down.
That same fire ignited in my chest. Anger washed over me, cleansing away the cowardice. For God’s sake, he was my only friend.
All I could see was red.
I spun around bringing the back of my fist across a guard’s face, shattering the bridge of his nose. Blood spurted from it as he dropped Pete’s legs.
With a giant step forward I brought an uppercut into the portly officer’s abdomen, dropping him like a ton of bricks.
I shoved a third into the corner, pinning him there as I screamed for Pete to run. He scampered out the opening and the last thing I heard were his footfalls as a baton smashed across the back of my skull. Everything went black before I even hit the ground.
—-----
I spent a month in solitary.
The room was so small it should have been inhumane to house a human being inside of it.
Still… I made the best of it with dips, pushups and situps. Countless reps of them. It was all I could do.
Some mornings I’d wake up with horrible migraines. I assumed it was a slight concussion from the impact of the baton.
I only hoped Pete could have somehow made it out. But somewhere deep down I knew that would have been impossible. Hopefully he at least gave them some hell before they took him below.
I stopped praying before bed. It didn’t seem like it did any good.
If there was a God, he didn’t exist inside these walls.
We were abandoned.
The unheard.
—-------
When I finally got back to my cell it had been emptied of everything. Pete’s books, artwork from his niece and even my Maxim cutout.
Just like he’d never existed. My heart sunk at the sight.
Later that day I’d learned from others that he had been captured just moments after escaping the cell.
But our actions weren’t wasted in vain.
We were the first to fight back against the abduction and it sparked something in the others.
They started talks of an uprising a few weeks back. A prison riot.
They even had a guard on the inside. C.O. Matthews. He was a very religious man and was just as horrified by what was happening as we were and had been looking for a way to help.
“It’s going down tonight John, just before lights out. Be ready.” Jerry whispered at the picnic table.
I gave a nod that I understood and headed off for my daily jog around the courts.
It wasn’t about getting out. Getting free. That wasn’t going to happen. It was about sending a message.
I let my mind go blank, filling with static as I enjoyed what could be my last day outside.
—------
The beacon swirled overhead in the common area.
“Inmates to their cells. Lights out.” The intercom buzzed.
There were over fifty men in cell block B, and not a single one of us moved.
The voice on the intercom repeated himself angrily as guards began to shuffle in closer. Nods passed like dominoes from one inmate to the next. We were ready.
“Get to your cell inmate.” a guard growled as he clamped his hands down on my shoulders.
I threw an elbow behind me into his groin, he howled in pain as he hit the floor. The other inmates sprung to their feet and flew off from their leaning places to join in the brawl.
Fists, feet and batons flew wildly across the cell block as we engaged in war with the uniformed officers.
I grappled with one until I was able to submit him in a choke until he went limp in my arms.
I stomped another in the face, spilling blood and brains on the concrete floor.
It had looked like we were winning until they sent the special response team in. We formed a line, many of us battered and bloody, in front of the row of riot shields.
We waited for their charge for what felt like an eternity.
But suddenly they backed out from where they’d come and slid the cell block doors closed.
What the hell…
The red beacon swirled once again overhead as a clicking sounded out behind us.
The rear entrance that the lab coats had always used swung open. I spun around to see…
“Mary, mother of God.” I gasped.
It was Pete…
But there was something horribly wrong with him.
His skin clung loosely to his body and had a terrible jaundice looking hue to it. His eyes almost seemed to glow and his hands… they were impossibly large like contorted branches.
I held my hand up to my mouth in disbelief.
A scientist stepped out from behind him.
“As you can see, we have a few kinks left to iron out, but we are making great progress. Would you all care to see what he can do?” He looked into each of our eyes inquisitively.
“If you don’t, head back to your cells now. You have ten seconds and then I shall release him.”
It was so silent you could hear a pin drop. But a violent and hungry energy filled the room, emanating from what used to be my friend.
Suddenly, over half the remaining inmates bolted for their cells out of fear. Not that I could blame them, my knees wobbled and threatened to buckle just at the sight of him.
But I stood my ground, as did a handful of others.
“Very well then. Specimen 3-1-0, engage.”
A growl reverberated through the cell block.
“Everyone rush him at once! It’s our only shot.” I hollered.
And we did, but it didn’t matter. It happened so fast. It was over before I could even comprehend it.
He moved like an animal, picking each of us apart almost in unison.
I lay on my back, unable to feel my legs as I watched Jerry be disemboweled. He was trying to shove his intestines back inside the tear in his abdomen before the creature came back to finish him off.
I did a cross over myself but didn’t bother to pray.
As Pete stood over me, with dead eyes, I knew there was no God.
He didn’t exist inside these walls.
We were abandoned.
The unheard.
Hello, I'm Annie, a 33 year old single girl. It's been two years since I broke up and now I'm desperate to find a true love. I am currently living in Europe, and I hope to meet a European friend to chat and share some interesting things in life. I like traveling very much, and I like to go to different countries to experience the local culture and food. My hobbies also include watching movies, listening to music and reading books. I love connecting with people and sharing each other's thoughts and insights. I hope to meet a man who is mature, responsible, kind, sincere, honest and self-motivated. I hope you are over 35 years old, have certain life experience and a stable career. Of course, the most important thing is that you have real love and a sense of responsibility to your family. If you meet my requirements, are willing to make friends seriously and have good expectations for the future, please contact me! We can get to know each other through online chat first, and if there is fate, we can also make an appointment to meet and spend a good time together.
I stared up at the magazine cut out of a Maxim model that was crudely pasted on the underside of the top bunk. Her pert breast shimmied ever so slightly as Pete tossed and turned above.
She was platinum blonde with legs long enough to wrap around me twice. Or so the camera angle made it seem. I felt a stirring below, that yearning for a woman’s touch… which I hadn’t felt in six years, three months, and eleven days.
I rolled to my side, stifling it. It was the wrong time to seek out an orgasm, and I knew after the release I’d just spiral into self-loathing anyway. I focused on a crack in the cinder block until my eyelids became heavy.
Static pushed the thought of women from my mind as I slipped into sleep. The smell of cigars and oil flitted through my mind in a memory. My dad’s repair shop. The one I was meant to take over, before the arrest…
------
“Aaaarrgghh!”
A cry echoing from somewhere deep within the prison startled me awake. My heart thundered in my chest like a rabbit thrashing against its cage.
I rolled over to see Pete crouching low, his face pressed against the bars.
“What’s going on?” I croaked.
“They’re taking Benny.” He whispered.
“Fuck, really?” I pulled myself to the top corner of my mattress, just enough to peer around the edge of the bars.
Two guards wrestled the young latino onto a gurney as a man in a lab coat watched from a distance. He fought against them but it was futile. Once the straps were locked in he screamed once more, pleading for help.
Dozens of eyes watched from dim lit cells, none of which stirring to offer assistance in the slightest. We knew there was no helping him. We knew what happened next…
His cries were muffled as the doctor jammed a syringe into the base of his neck. Benny’s muscles tensed and pulsed in the fit of a seizure, but then lay still. The cell block was silent once more as they wheeled him down the hall and into the catacombs.
I did a cross over myself but didn’t bother to pray. Once they took them, they never came back.
“A damn shame…” I muttered.
“Yeah, he was a good kid…” Pete stood and leapt back onto the top bunk.
A fire burned in my chest. I wanted to say something. To cry out about the injustice of what was happening to us. That committing a crime shouldn’t damn a man to whatever terrible fate they had instore for us below three feet of steel and a quarter mile of dirt.
But I didn’t… What good could it do? Other than drawing attention to me in a very negative way.
Once they took you to the lab, you were never seen again.
All you could do was hope that your number was never called, and that you got out of here before they visited your cell late into the night.
—-----
87…88…89…90…
My chest was on fire as sweat dripped from the tip of my nose. I couldn’t go back to sleep last night. Kept thinking about Benny.
91…92…93…
So began the push-ups. It was the only way to clear my head.
94…95…96…
My therapy.
97…98…99…100.
I rolled to my back, out of breath.
Three years, six months and change.
So much time left to go.
Benny had only been here for a little over a year. It made no sense…
None of us could figure out exactly why they took who they took. There seemed to be no method to the madness.
Just a couple weeks ago they took old man Tom Finch. He’d been here longer than any of us. A lifer on the account of premeditated murder back in the 70s. But they didn’t come for him until he’d served most of his adult life behind bars.
The red beacon suddenly swirled above. A buzzing sound hummed as the cell doors clicked and slid open.
Breakfast.
—----
I pulled my tray along the bar to be loaded with oats, powdered eggs and bread.
Meager rations.
I grabbed a small carton of milk and made my way over to sit with Pete. He was already nibbling on his toast while perusing a crossword puzzle.
We exchanged nods and I went to devouring the entirety of my plate.
Calories build muscle after all.
Which was something Pete had no interest in. He was a bookworm through and through. Rail thin too. When we’d met, I’d assumed it was from the drug problem he’d had on the outside, which ultimately landed him in incarceration. But come to find out it was just his metabolism and general lack of appetite.
“John…” He whispered.
I looked up from my feast.
He was looking to the corner of the cafeteria and I followed his gaze to see two men in lab coats surveying the crowd.
I grunted and squeezed the handle of my fork until my knuckles went white. The impulse of burying it into their throats was almost overwhelming.
“Their activity has been ramping up.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’ve been seeing them much more frequently as of late. They must be close to a breakthrough.”
“Breakthrough of what?” I furrowed my brow.
“Who knows? Whatever it is they are doing down there. They’ve been taking us more often as well.”
Pete sighed at the twist of confusion on my face.
“Think about it… Benny last night, then Tom two weeks before that. Then Eric ten days before that, and Deonte maybe three weeks prior. It’s never been that close together. Until recently, they only came perhaps once every other month. Sometimes only once a season.”
Shit… he was right. I hadn’t realized it before.
“So what does that mean?” I asked, shoving another hunk of egg into my mouth.
“I have no idea. But I’d say our odds of survival have been reduced dramatically.”
—-----
Pete might as well have been an oracle, peering into our grim and desolate future.
Over the next several months we started seeing the lab coats weekly. Sometimes even more often than that.
The prison yard felt empty. Sure there were still plenty of us left, but our population had been noticeably trimmed. One gang in particular only had two members left, which didn’t bode well for them. The others slowly circled them like sharks. I had no affiliation with any of them and kept to myself. But still, I could see their fate a mile away.
Although, despite the business as usual dog eat dog atmosphere, there was an undercurrent of fear rippling through the general pop. You could smell it, like a scent of decay and desperation. Hard faces that had once promised violence, now almost flinched around every corner and jumped at each shadow.
The energy of a couple of hundred men that felt like an animal backed into a corner was palpable.
But what could we do?
I didn’t know but I sure wish someone would tell me… I threw myself into my workouts and Pete hardly ever looked up from a book. Escapism was our only reprieve.
I went to bed with a prayer on my lips, hoping I wouldn’t hear those iron bars moving in the late hours of the night.
—-----
A loud clanking followed by footsteps pulled me from sleep.
I squeezed my eyes tightly shut hoping it was the cell next to mine.
But it wasn’t…
Three guards hovered behind a fourth that was unlocking our cell. The bars clicked and began to slide open.
I jumped to my feet and backed up against the wall. I pulled my fists up into a boxing stance, I wasn’t going to go without a fight. My muscles tensed and flexed like coiled steel.
“In the corner inmate! We’re here for your cellmate.” A short and stocky corrections officer barked with his hand gripping the baton at his waist.
Pete squirmed into a ball at the corner of his mat and looked at me with wide, pleading eyes.
I put my face in the opposite corner as instructed. A mixture of fear and relief roiled in my gut, and I hated myself for it. It made me feel like a coward.
“No, no, no, no, no!” I heard Pete squeal from behind as guards flooded the cell.
I peaked over my shoulder and watched as they pried him from the top bunk. Pete tried to resist, but there was nothing to him. A bag of bones that they easily wrestled down.
That same fire ignited in my chest. Anger washed over me, cleansing away the cowardice. For God’s sake, he was my only friend.
All I could see was red.
I spun around bringing the back of my fist across a guard’s face, shattering the bridge of his nose. Blood spurted from it as he dropped Pete’s legs.
With a giant step forward I brought an uppercut into the portly officer’s abdomen, dropping him like a ton of bricks.
I shoved a third into the corner, pinning him there as I screamed for Pete to run. He scampered out the opening and the last thing I heard were his footfalls as a baton smashed across the back of my skull. Everything went black before I even hit the ground.
—-----
I spent a month in solitary.
The room was so small it should have been inhumane to house a human being inside of it.
Still… I made the best of it with dips, pushups and situps. Countless reps of them. It was all I could do.
Some mornings I’d wake up with horrible migraines. I assumed it was a slight concussion from the impact of the baton.
I only hoped Pete could have somehow made it out. But somewhere deep down I knew that would have been impossible. Hopefully he at least gave them some hell before they took him below.
I stopped praying before bed. It didn’t seem like it did any good.
If there was a God, he didn’t exist inside these walls.
We were abandoned.
The unheard.
—-------
When I finally got back to my cell it had been emptied of everything. Pete’s books, artwork from his niece and even my Maxim cutout.
Just like he’d never existed. My heart sunk at the sight.
Later that day I’d learned from others that he had been captured just moments after escaping the cell.
But our actions weren’t wasted in vain.
We were the first to fight back against the abduction and it sparked something in the others.
They started talks of an uprising a few weeks back. A prison riot.
They even had a guard on the inside. C.O. Matthews. He was a very religious man and was just as horrified by what was happening as we were and had been looking for a way to help.
“It’s going down tonight John, just before lights out. Be ready.” Jerry whispered at the picnic table.
I gave a nod that I understood and headed off for my daily jog around the courts.
It wasn’t about getting out. Getting free. That wasn’t going to happen. It was about sending a message.
I let my mind go blank, filling with static as I enjoyed what could be my last day outside.
—------
The beacon swirled overhead in the common area.
“Inmates to their cells. Lights out.” The intercom buzzed.
There were over fifty men in cell block B, and not a single one of us moved.
The voice on the intercom repeated himself angrily as guards began to shuffle in closer. Nods passed like dominoes from one inmate to the next. We were ready.
“Get to your cell inmate.” a guard growled as he clamped his hands down on my shoulders.
I threw an elbow behind me into his groin, he howled in pain as he hit the floor. The other inmates sprung to their feet and flew off from their leaning places to join in the brawl.
Fists, feet and batons flew wildly across the cell block as we engaged in war with the uniformed officers.
I grappled with one until I was able to submit him in a choke until he went limp in my arms.
I stomped another in the face, spilling blood and brains on the concrete floor.
It had looked like we were winning until they sent the special response team in. We formed a line, many of us battered and bloody, in front of the row of riot shields.
We waited for their charge for what felt like an eternity.
But suddenly they backed out from where they’d come and slid the cell block doors closed.
What the hell…
The red beacon swirled once again overhead as a clicking sounded out behind us.
The rear entrance that the lab coats had always used swung open. I spun around to see…
“Mary, mother of God.” I gasped.
It was Pete…
But there was something horribly wrong with him.
His skin clung loosely to his body and had a terrible jaundice looking hue to it. His eyes almost seemed to glow and his hands… they were impossibly large like contorted branches.
I held my hand up to my mouth in disbelief.
A scientist stepped out from behind him.
“As you can see, we have a few kinks left to iron out, but we are making great progress. Would you all care to see what he can do?” He looked into each of our eyes inquisitively.
“If you don’t, head back to your cells now. You have ten seconds and then I shall release him.”
It was so silent you could hear a pin drop. But a violent and hungry energy filled the room, emanating from what used to be my friend.
Suddenly, over half the remaining inmates bolted for their cells out of fear. Not that I could blame them, my knees wobbled and threatened to buckle just at the sight of him.
But I stood my ground, as did a handful of others.
“Very well then. Specimen 3-1-0, engage.”
A growl reverberated through the cell block.
“Everyone rush him at once! It’s our only shot.” I hollered.
And we did, but it didn’t matter. It happened so fast. It was over before I could even comprehend it.
He moved like an animal, picking each of us apart almost in unison.
I lay on my back, unable to feel my legs as I watched Jerry be disemboweled. He was trying to shove his intestines back inside the tear in his abdomen before the creature came back to finish him off.
I did a cross over myself but didn’t bother to pray.
As Pete stood over me, with dead eyes, I knew there was no God.
He didn’t exist inside these walls.
We were abandoned.
The unheard.
I've applied for an internal position in data analysis. Part of the interview process is a 15 minute presentation, but no topic has been given and I'm finding it difficult to think of something. It doesn't sound like it needs to be work related as such, so that's not an issue, but part of the problem I'm finding is that most data I can find has already been analysed, and now I'm wondering if I'm overthinking it. These are the instructions for the presentation:
Ahead of the interview we'd like you to prepare a presentation on a topic of your choice to present on the day. The presentation should cover a current topic of your choice where you can present the data, insights, trends from that topic and answer any follow up questions.
It just feels too broad and vague to me, I'd have felt much more comfortable if a topic was given, or a set of data to interpret. Considering just withdrawing my application as the interview is on Tuesday and I just can't see myself coming up with anything.
All good things must come to an end. 🥲
As you surely know by now, this will be the very last Cup in The Silph Arena's long and glorious history. And so even though I slowly faded away from my monthy meta writeups for Silph some time ago (I think it's been over a year now! 🥹), I HAD to come back for one last ride together, my friends. Like many of you, I only ever got into PvP
because of The Arena, and was a PvP veteran when GBL was still but a twinkle in John Hanke's eye. Many wonderful memories of tournaments and communities, local and remote, that I will cherish always.
And of course: YOU, my dear readers. I am sorry I stepped back, but you all surpassed beyond me and my relatively simple meta overviews. After a while, budget picks became less and less necessary to study as you had more and more tools already at your disposal, built up from the metas of the past.
In short, to paraphrase the great Yoda himself:
I am what you grew beyond. That is the true burden of all teachers. And perhaps, here at the end, you still don't need my simple budget heroes, my rather basic overview of the meta and, of course, off-meta potential wonders. You know, the thrifty AND the nifty stuff. 😉
But I can think of no better way to say a proper goodbye to the good folks at The Silph Arena AND you, my dear friends, than to give this one last go. Together.
One last..."Nifty Or Thrifty"! For old times' sake.
So here we go!
For those who don't remember, this article series serves a few functions. First, it gives a first blush, comprehensive look at the meta for the upcoming
Innocent Cup, particularly from the perspective of which Pokémon are likely worth the cost of leveling up and adding a second charge move (
nifty) and which ones would probably work out fine without heavy investment (
thrifty), including some alternatives to the more expensive options. For those on a stardust budget — and/or folks trying to save up some dust for the future — it can be daunting trying to figure out where to spend or not spend it. We all want to field competitive teams of six, but where can we get the best bang for our buck and where should we perhaps instead channel our inner scrooge?
And as always, while I have tried to whittle somewhat, this is likely to be a
long read, just to warn you up front! But always as per normal, I'll try to keep it entertaining as well. 😃
Before we dive in, make sure to familiarize yourself with what makes up Innocent Cup. It's Dragon, Fairy, Flying, Psychic, and Water type Pokémon, with with Arbok, Dragalge, Garbodor, and Swalot specifically whitelisted in as well. Excluded are Ice, Fire, Poison and Steel types, plus Altaria, Galarian Zapdos, Galarian Moltres, Galarian Articuno, Cresselia, Hawlucha, Lanturn, Mandibuzz, Mantine, Mew, Alolan Ninetales, Noctowl, Pelipper, Pidgeot, and Trevenant are all specifically banned. The full list and rules are over
here, so check that out before reading on.
Now it's time to dive in, but only after one final, unapologetic musical intro. Hit it!
🎼
Oops, let's do this again 🎶
Silph played with our hearts ♫
We got lost in the game ♩
Oh baby, baby ♫
Oops, I think I'm in love ♬
Silph was sent from aboooooove ♪
I'm not that Innocent....
Okay, maybe not one of my greatest ever, but it was either this or a mushy goodbye song like "My Way" or something.
Anyway, in retro style, let's go through this final meta in order of cheapest second move cost all the way to the Legendaries. Here we go!
10,000 Dust/25 Candy
ALOLAN RAICHU Volt Switch Thunder Punch & Wild Charge/Psychic There is a LOT in AhChu's favor here. It resists Flying, Psychic, Electric, and Fighting damage — all very relevant in this format — and wails on all the Waters and Flyers around. As tempting as
Grass Knot is for its ability to blow away the Mud Boys (and other Ground types), I think that if you choose NOT to use
Wild Charge, it is
Psychic (the move, to keep the old inside joke going!) that you want more, as it can at least slap around the important Poison types in the meta (beating ALL of them, whereas Dragalge and Swalot can escape otherwise). That said, the overall more threatening move remains Wild Charge, which obviously has its drawbacks, but is pretty widely unresisted and alone has the power to blow away things like Hypno, Azumarill, and Araquanid.
EMOLGA Thunder Shock Discharge & Acrobatics When I began this article (WAY too long ago now! ), Emolga was a mere footnote here. But that was
then, and
this is now with the addition of
Acrobatics. I still don't know how high Emolga may soar now in PvP, but I know that with THIS meta, it should be off to an impressive start!
SWELLOW Wing Attack Sky Attack & Brave Bird Wait wait wait...
Wing Attack and
Sky Attack and Brave Bird? Why have you hardly seen any of these used? Well, it's much less tanky than Pidgeot and especially Noctowl, which is why they generally get all the press and poor Swellow usually languishes. But one thing that has always separated Silph from GBL are the spot bans, and in this Cup, it is Noctowl and Pidgeot that are on the outside looking in, allowing
Swellow to soar high. And beyond the obvious Electrics and a few Fairies, there really isn't too much that it has to fear. Go fly past the competition!
DARTRIX Leafage Brave Bird & Seed Bomb Poor
Decidueye may remain unexciting in PvP, but at least Dartrix now gets
its moment in the spotlight as a budget (and with the addition of
Leafage, perhaps even better?) Tropius here. I say "perhaps better" despite the fact that
Razor Leaf Trop has a better record because of between the two, only Dartrix manages to overcome Dragalge and Clefable (and spicy Togetic). Trop instead shreds things like Hypno, Gliscor, Wobbuffet, Alolan Raichu, and Seaking, so there's certainly room for both, but Dartrix is absolutely the better fit on some teams.
WHIMSICOTT Fairy Wind Moonblast & Seed Bomb/Grass Knot I'm listing
Charm and/or
Hurricane as options here, but other than the latter sometimes winning the mirror, there's really nothing major they can do that
Fairy Wind and
Moonblast (along with one of the now-two Grass moves) can't. Only with the speedy charging of Fairy Wind can Whimsie outrace stuff like Azumarill, Tapu Fini, and Whiscash, and Moonblast is more reliable than Hurricane at taking out things like Wobbuffet, Zapdos, and importantly, have the advantage versus Dragalge. As for
Grass Knot vs the new
Seed Bomb, the former has the power to take down Wobb and Whiscash, while the latter instead now outraces (Fairy Wind) Slurpuff, (Ice Beam) Jellicent, and (Sludge Wave) Swampert. Go with Fairy Wind. You have plenty of other Charm options anyway. For example....
WIGGLYTUFF Charm Ice Beam & Disarming Voice Yes, you definitely want both
Ice Beam and the new Disarming Voice for Wiggly to be well-rounded, but as is often the case with Charmers, it can often be best to
go for the Charm-down, allowing additional wins against stuff like Dedenne, Tapu Fini, Florges. and several fellow Charmers (assuming they are not
also trying to just Charm-down). Wiggly remains among the best, if not THE best, pure Charmer in yet another format.
CLEFABLE Fairy Wind Meteor Mash & Moonblast Fairy Wind is now the way to go here (and likely in many metas yet to come), as
Meteor Mash can do some serious work, especially in whalloping the other Faires! You can run
Psychic as well to also shock Poisons (Swalot and Dragalge in particular), but it's overall a bit weaker than
Moonblast, which is needed for wins like Azu, Hypno, Wobbuffet, and most of the Electrics in the meta (Dedenne, Zapdos, and Emolga, specifically).
SWALOT Infestation Sludge Bomb & Ice Beam/Gunk Shot I've written about Swalot before, but only as an often-desperate attempt to show it as a decent thrifty Poison with upside. But never has it really SHOWN that upside
like it does here in Innocent Cup. It can swallow all Grasses and Fairies whole, and can also topple things like DDeoxys, Alolan Raichu, Dedenne, Wobbuffet, Seaking, and fellow Poison Garbodor. Give it
Ice Beam for coverage instead of big closer
Gunk Shot, and while it gives up a couple Fairies (Azumarill, Tapu Fini) and Araquanid, it gains Ice-weak Zapdos and Zweilous instead. Swalot is not only finally a breakout star here at the end of Arena play, but you have legit
options with it! You love to see it.
SWAMPERT Mud Shot Hydro Cannonᴸ & Earthquake/Sludge Wave It would be easy to assume that
Sludge Wave is clearly THE way to go in this meta filled with Fairies and key Grass types. And there is wisdom in that, as Sludge does indeed conquer every Fairy here except the new Fairy Wind Togetic. But there remains just a strong a case for good old
Earthquake instead, as it instead knocks out all the Poisons, plus Zweilous, Jellicent, and enemy Swamperts. The choice is even more in Quake's favor for Shadow Swampert, as it beats all the major Fairies besides Togekiss, Togetic, Azu, and Whimsie, still uniquely takes down Dragalge, Jellicent, and Swampert, and adds to that Whiscash and Rainy Castform as well. I understand the attention being given to Sludge Wave... Innocent Cup IS one of the better fits for it. Just don't put those blinders on too tightly. Earthquake still bears consideration too, depending on the rest of your team. And of course, there is also
Shadow Swampert, which I think also prefers Earthquake, beating everything Quake non-Shadow Swampie can, PLUS Clefable, Tapu Fini, and Slurpuff as non-Shadow can only if it has Sludge Wave, AND completely unique wins versus Gliscor, Zapdos, and Rainy Castform too!
WHISCASH Mud Shot Mud Bomb & Blizzard Aside from the just-buffed
Mud Bomb making Whiscash a bit better anyway, it has one other big thing going for it in this meta that separates it from Swampert:
Blizzard, which simply destroys Flyers (Drifblim, Emolga, Jumpluff, Togekiss, Togetic) that Swampert can't touch, as well as Whimsicott for good measure. Sure, Whiscash can't match Swampert's wins versus things like Hypno, Florges, Tapu Fini, or Florges, and usually will lose to Swampert in the head to head, but at least it stands on pretty equal footing in this meta. Some teams will want one, some will want the other. Which do YOU prefer, my friend?
BLASTOISE Water Gun Hydro Cannonᴸ & Ice Beam As always, Blastoise is not exactly exciting, but it can get the job done in a pinch. Its excellent bulk allows it to hang in and beat every meta Fairy that isn't part Water or Grass, and also handles things like Drifblim, Swampert and Whiscash, Swalot and Garbodor, and thanks to Ice Beam, Dragalge, Jumpluff, and (Air Slash) Tropius as well. Nothing flashy, but solid as always. I do not particularly recommend
Shadow Blastie.
GOLISOPOD Shadow Claw X-Scissor & Liquidation Golisopod is suddenly interesting now that it has all-new move
Liquidation, which brings in new wins like Whiscash (it already beat Swampert), Swalot, Drifblim, and Gliscor. Add to this some surprising wins like Azumarill, Rainy Castform, and Alolan Raichu, and Golisopod may be more spicy than meta itself, but it's certainly on the upswing.
GYARADOS Dragon Breath Aqua Tailᴸ & Crunch Gyarados does
just enough to be interesting, including taking out all the Poisons and Dragons in the meta, all Grounds but Quagsire, and stuff like Hypno, Wobbuffet, Jellicent, Rainy Castform, Drifblim, Araquanid. Slurpuff, and even Jumpluff. Not bad, right? Just don't get too cute with
Shadow Gary.
SWOOBAT Confusion Psychic Fangs & Aerial Ace Hey, leave it to me for the
oddball picks, especially among the "thrifty" 10ks. Swoobat is NOT a good PvP Pokémon, but it DOES come with
Confusion to blow away the scary Poisons, and being a Flyer means it performs well against things like Swampert, Medicham, and the Grasses as well. It also manages to several of the big name Fairies and even Gliscor and Rainy Castform too. Not fantastic, but a lot of potential fun in this final Silph Cup.
50,000 Dust/50 Candy
SEAKING Poison Jabᴸ Icy Windᴸ & Drill Runᴸ One thing that doesn't change, despite all the new Fairy Wind around, is that Seaking still wipes away ALL the Fairies here, even really scary ones like Dedenne and Aromatisse/Slurpuff, even with fast-charging Fairy Wind and their scary Electric and Grass charge moves. With its adaptive moveset, it also handles big Poisons Dragalge and Garbodor, Flyers like Gliscor, Tropius, Emolga, and Jumpluff (and most non-Razor Leaf Grasses in this meta in general), and Dragons like Zweilous. Versatile and a LOT of fun, Seaking earns every bit of its current
Top 3 Ranking in Innocent Cup!
JUMPLUFF Fairy Wind Energy Ball & Acrobaticsᴸ So here's one that DOES take a little hit with the redistribution of Fairy Wind (but
Jumpie is still pretty good!). Jumpluff beats all the major Fairies except Florges... unless they're running Fairy Wind. But now it loses to FW Clefable, who is likely to suddenly be quite popular, and FW Togetic, who I feel like folks are going to bring as long-desired spice. It also has not a prayer against most Poisons (though it
can handle Dragalge thanks to resisting Aqua Tail) but beats
most Waters, Wobb, Medicham, Hypno, Zweilous, and even Tropius.
DEDENNE Thunder Shock Discharge & Play Rough When and I other analysts starting looking over this meta, we got
very excited about Deedee. Upon further review, I personally like Alolan Raichu better overall, as it knocks out things Dedenne cannot like Hypno, Florges, Drifblim, Jumpluff, Seaking (Deedee does NOT like Poison damage!), Fini, Castform, and Clefable. Dedenne IS still
quite good, with its better bulk and Fairy subtyping allowing it unique wins like Wobbuffet, Slurpluff, and Zweilous. And of course, you can always put Deedee AND AhChu on the same team of six....
FLORGES Fairy Wind Disarming Voice & Moonblast So Florges doesn't do anything particularly unique, as it is arguably best running with all Fairy moves. It CAN do some neat things with
Vine Whip, like beating Jellicent and winning the mirror, but
Fairy Wind is just better, instead taking out Jumpluff, Hypno, Wobbuffet, Whimsicott, Tropius and more.
As for other 50k Fairies:
- AROMATISSE is just kind of there. Thunderbolt is nice coverage in this meta in theory, but of course Charm makes it more of a Hail Mary than something to truly threaten all the Waters and Flyers with.
- SLURPUFF can operate with Fairy Wind, though it does so much less successfully than others. It's actually probably also best as a Charmer, just, again, a rather unexciting one. At least Flamethrower and Energy Ball are fantastic coverage options if you ever get to throw them!
- GRANBULL and TOGEKISS are even less exciting. Pass.
There is ONE other Fairy well worth mentioning here, though....
AZUMARILL Bubble Ice Beam & Hydro Pump/Play Rough If there's one lesson we learned early on in The Arena, it's that if you allow Azumarill into a meta, it
will find a way to become relevant. And lo and behold,
here is yet another example. Not even Swalot, Emolga, or Zapdos can safely overcome Azu! And that's on top of all the Fighters, Psychics, Flyers, Mud Boys and fellow Fairies that Azu can strike down. Azumarill is a strong contender here, as it has basically always been in these metas.
JELLICENT Hex Surf &/or Shadow Ball &/or Ice Beam I think I can pretty definitively recommend
Hex as the fast move, but after that? Time for a classic side-by-side. My default recommendation is
Surf/Shadow Ball, which can get to meaningful wins like Whiscash, Drifblim, and the mirror, but also valid are
Surf/Ice Beam and even
Beam/Ball work. Ice Beam is basically required to beat Whimsicott, Tropius, Jumpluff, and Dragalge, but can usually do it alongside Ball
or Surf. Beam/Ball can beat most of what Surf/Ball and Surf/Beam can except Clefable, Florges, and Slurpuff. I think the basic question is thus: do you need extra coverage versus Grasses and Dragons? If so: Ice Beam. If not? Probably just stick with Surf/Shadow Ball. But there's no "wrong" answer, really. Good luck!
ARAQUANID Bug Bite Bubble Beam & Mirror Coat/Bug Buzz Gotta be that
Bug Buzz is the closer to go with, right? Well, yes... but also perhaps no. It's true that only the raw power of Bug Buzz can overcome things like Seaking, Fairy Wind Whimsicott, and Clefable, but as bad a move as
Mirror Coat is, it's ALSO true that 'Nid can overcome all the format's Poison types (and win the mirror match) only with Mirror Coat, not Buzz. Do with that information what you will, but I like when I get to highlight secret tech like that.
QUAGSIRE Mud Shot Stone Edge & Mud Bomb/Earthquake I still don't think it's
quite right to call new Quag toy
Mud Bomb a straight upgrade, as there are good things like
Earthquake can still do that Bomb can't, like overpowering Azumarill and Swampert. But yes,
Mud Bomb is probably the de facto standard now, getting its own nice wins versus things like Seaking, Rainy Castform, Tapu Fini, and Wigglytuff. Lord Quag is certainly more interesting than it was in May, particularly
Shadow Quag which can do all of that PLUS also beat all versions of Jellicent, Hypno, and Togekiss, and Azumarill slides back into the win column too!
DRAGALGE Dragon Tail Aqua Tail & Gunk Shot/Outrage Good enough place as any to slide over to the relevant Poison types, since Dragalge masquerades as a Water type with
Aqua Tail. But which way to go for the closer? Well, I'll start by saying that either one nets wins versus Araquanid (without Mirror Coat!), Tropius, and Jumpluff. After that, the slightly better record lies with
Outrage that can beat Jellicent and Castform with high neutral damage, but I think I STILL lean towards
Gunk Shot for its own unique win versus Azumarill and its high pressure versus enemy Fairies, Grasses, and others in the meta. In this case, I'd just keep it simple.
GARBODOR Infestation Gunk Shot & Body Slam/Seed Bomb With a face only a mother could love, here comes the only meta that can also tolerate Garbo. It's still not
quite on the same tier as Dragalge and Swalot, but yes,
Garbo is legit viable in Innocent Cup.
Body Slam is my recommendation for spam alongside the required
Gunk Shot, as Slam overwhelms stuff like Wobbuffet and Araquanid. But there is some potential spice here as well if you instead run with
Seed Bomb, as you can then beat (Sludge Wave) Swampert and surprise the heck out of Ground and Water types in general.
ARBOK Acid Dark Pulse & Acid Spray And even a small step below Garbodor (
there is a sentence is
never thought I would write!), we have Arbok
withAcid, and NOT the
Dragon Tail you might expect instead. While it's true that Tail can beat other Dragons and/or Poisons (Dragalge, Zweilous, and Swalot specifically),
it's very poor otherwise. Acid is a bad move, but it does manage to
dissolve (see what I did there? I so funny hee hee haha) every non-Psychic Fairy and Grass type in the meta besides Tapu Fini, which is obviously a big deal in this meta.
HYPNO Confusion Shadow Ball & Thunder Punch/Ice Punch Usually an analysis on Hypno means a long debate between competing (and all viable) movesets. Now there ARE several that work outside of my recommendation of
Shadow Ball/Thunder Punch, but I am ready to label that the odds on favorite. It just brings the most overall pressure in this meta, especially to the many Water and Flying types (beating Azumarill as one specific example), at the very small cost of being non-ideal versus Grasses... though Hypno doesn't beat Jumpluff or Tropius with Fire OR Ice anyway, so in my mind, no harm, no foul. At least, that's the way I'd go for non-Shadow. For
Shadow Hypno,
Ice Punch now comes with the power to freeze and shatter Jumpluff and Tropius, as well as Gliscor and Swampert, and still manages to knock out Azumarill too. Best of all worlds!
FARIGAMARIF Confusion/Tackle Psychic Fangs & Thunderbolt Bittersweet moment here, as it's my last time getting to talk about ol' Geeriffa— um, Giffimar— uh, Jeffomafig? Oh,
fine... Girafarig. Yes, I HAVE known how to spell it all these years. 😅 My boy has only gotten better since recieving
Psychic Fangs, to the point that it's viable in TWO configurations in this meta: [
Tackle]() to overcome fellow Psychics (the type, NOT the move... two long-running jokes in one section! 💪) like Hypno, or
Confusion which overpowers Whimsicott, Drifblim, Castform, and Clefable and is, honestly, just the better fast move in general. And don't forget
Shadow Farigamiraf, which does give up Swampert, Jumpluff, Gliscor, and Charm Whimsie, but
gains Surf/Shadow Ball Jellicent (already beats other Jelli variants), Seaking, Tapu Fini, Whiscash, and Togetic... and now beats Hypno without needing Tackle! One last toast to everyone's favorite funky Girafamathingy! It's been real, buddy. Glad you get to go out in style. 🦒
SLOWBRO/SLOWKING Confusion/Water Gun Surfᴸ & Ice Beam/Psychic Slowbro gets the slight nod because I like
Confusion/Surf/Ice Beam the best personally (with standout wins versus Jumpluff, Tropius, and Florges), but if you want to instead run
Water Gun/Surf/
Psychic (the move!), then
Slowking or Slowbro work equally well. The unique wins there are basically other Psychic types like DDeoxys and Wobbuffet. Either way, the Super Slow Bros are pretty nifty here! Similar
BRUXISH not quite so much though.
CLAYDOL Confusion Rock Tomb & Ice Beam/Shadow Ball Not a strong recommendation, but Claydol does just enough here to be interesting (and that should make the Niantic employee that keeps adding moves to it every couple seasons very happy). With
Ice Beam it beats Jumpluff, but beyond that you really want
Shadow Ball, I think, which can instead beat Seaking and gives Claydol unique coverage versus Psychics, Flyers, AND Poisons, among others.
MEDICHAM Counter Ice Punch & Psychic Speaking of doing just enough to be interesting, this is one of those rare-ish metas where Medicham is
merely okay. It does manage to hold down the Poisons as a good Psychic type should, but beyond that it doesn't really know what it wants to be in this meta, settling for picking off some big names but whiffing on plenty of others. I don't feel great about it myself, but be ready for it to show up in your opponent's six at some point, especially after it absolutely rocked the first Play Pokémon tournaments of the new GBL season.
HONCHKROW Snarl Sky Attack & Brave Bird One final chance to put in a good word for Honch (and end a 50k section with some spice...
sniff 😢), one of the ultimate
boom or bust options in PvP. Really not much to say than that... just reminding you that it and its
Shadow version remain out there, lurking, daring you to take a shot with it. High risk, but potentially sky high reward in this final Silph month, folks!
75,000 Dust/75 Candy
TROPIUS Razor Leaf Aerial Ace & Leaf Blade I feel I am contractually obligated to start this section with ol' Banana Chin, specifically to point out a rare disagreement with my good friend Mr. PvPoke, who lists
Air Slash as the fast move of choice. Respectfully, I disagree... it is
Razor Leaf you want here. Not only does it still manage to beat everything Air Slash can that you most care about, and not only does it shred even scary Water types like Seaking and Jellicent, but it's also THE way for Trop to beat Florges and Electric types like Alolan Raichu and Dedenne. If you want more charge move pressure and such, go with Jumpluff. If you want to just beat stuff down almost regardless of remaining shields, Razor Leaf Tropius is your friend.
GLISCOR Wing Attack Night Slash & Earthquake Regular and
Shadow both have plenty of merit. Non-Shadow has the bulk to outlast Clefable, Florges, Whimsicott, Zweilous, Medicham, Emolga, and Swampert, while Shadow instead has the raw power to overcome Jellicent, Tropius, Zapdos, Whiscash (before it can get to Blizzard), and non-Ice Punch Hypno.
GLIGAR Wing Attack Night Slash & Returnᴾ Honestly, though...
purified Gligar is just better than Gliscor.
Return is a big equalizing beatstick that allows Gligar to beat everything Gliscor can (regular and Shadow Gliscor
combined, that is) except Jellicent, Whiscash, and Swalot, and further add on wins against Dragalge, Togekiss, and Gliscor itself! I think Gligar is a big time sleeper in Innocent Cup.
DRIFBLIM Hex Icy Wind & Shadow Ball It just got
Mystical Fire, but at least in this meta, I think Blim wants to stick with
Icy Wind, which does everything Fire can do plus can beat Flyers like Gliscor and Togetic. And just this once, I even give
Shadow Blim a thumbs up. It drops Dedenne, but gains Tapu Fini, Rainy Castform, and stuff like Slurpuff too. Nice!
RAINY CASTFORM Water Gun Weather Ball (Water) & Thunder No Lanturn,
no problem? Lanturn would indeed be perhaps a bit OP here, but Rainy is juuuuuuust right. Washes away Swalot and Garbo
and even resists-all-its-moves Dragalge, Clefable and Togetic and Wigglytuff, and of course a ton of Waters (Jelli, Azu, Fini, Seaking) thanks to
Thunder (and Swampert thanks to
Weather Ball spam). Someone is definitely going to do well with it this month.
SYLVEON Qucik Attack Psyshockᴸ & Moonblast I mean, you CAN run Sylvie with
Charm, but what makes it unique is
Quick Attack. That plus
Psyshock makes it the Fairy that handles the Poisons, while still doing most of the standard Fairy job (handling Dragons and Fighters and Bugs) and beating most of its fellow Fairies (and Jumpluff!) as well. It is very quietly a
great Fairy in this meta.
ZWEILOUS Dragon Breath Body Slam & Dark Pulse Yes yes, it MUST avoid double super effective Fairy damage. And that leaves it with a
less than inspiring record against the core meta. But take those away, and it has little to worry about beyond the few Bugs and Fighters in the meta. It beats the other Dragons you're going to see, and obviously dominates Psychic and Ghost types. And being a Dragon means resisting Water and Electric and Grass damage and beating many of those types too. It's far better (and sure to be far more popular) than the simple numbers would indicate.
DRAGONAIR Dragon Breath Body Slam & Aqua Tail Similar story here.
The numbers are so-so, for similar reasons as Zweilous, but Dragonair puts out a lot of very spammy neutral damage. And unlike Zweilous, it can handle Seaking, Whiscash, DDeoxys and others.
I'll point out that
Shadow DRAGONITE is pretty spicy too, though far less safe. It's more of a blunt object to the scalpel of Dragonair and Zweilous.
100,000 Dust/75 Candy
Running out of space (and already WAY out of time), so gonna blow through these briefly....
- ZAPDOS is the most interesting Legendary here, even with Emolga now really nipping at its heels. Emolga can overcome Whimsicott, Medicham, and Swalot, but it's still advantage Zapdos with wins versus Seaking, Jelli, Swampert, Gliscor, and Emolga itself. Zappie is still worth it, folks.
- It's no Azumarill, but yes, TAPU FINI still puts in some work. While Azu can outlast things like Emolga, Zapdos, Swampert, Gliscor, Florges, Wobb, and DDeoxys, it is Fini that alone can beat Jellicent, Dragalge, Araquanid, and Dedenne. There really IS a good case for both. If you're feeling particularly frisky, maybe literally both on the same team?
- Honorable mentions for GUZZLORD (which, unlike Zweilous, at least carries Sludge Bomb to somewhat threaten Fairies), LATIOS (just a Dragon that can wallop Poisons and other things with Luster Purge), DEFENSE DEOXYS (not particularly awesome here, but always a decent filler), and strangely-popular-so-far (according to Cup stats to date) CELEBI.
FEELIN' LUCKY?
For those unfamilar, this final section wraps up with stuff that needs to be pushed far into XL Candy territory. It CAN be great, but we're way past any semblance of "thrifty" at this point. Let's bring this one home!
- Staraptor isn't so hot here (partly because there's just not much for Close Combat to do), but STARAVIA has got the sauce, right up there with the surprising Swellow. The downside, of course, is having to max out Staravia just to get to 1468 CP. Worth it? Well that's YOUR call, my friend!
- So this one is cheating a bit, because RUFFLET is actually more than viable JUST beyond Level 40, if you max out a hundo at Level 40.5, hitting 1500 CP right on the nose. And it actually performs better in ways than the recommended heavy XL investment variety, having a better shot at beating Hypno and Swalot (while #1 IVs instead takes down only Dragalge and Togekiss instead). Wing Attack/Brave Bird** can't even be held down by the mediocre Aerial Ace. Rufflet is yet another strong bird candidate. If it didn't make sense why Noctowl and Pidgeot were banned yet, this should finally make that case.
- VULLABY kinda works too (and is one I KNOW folks have already invested in), obviously with distinct advantages versus Psychics and Ghosts in particular, and it beats plenty else besides. The big risk, of course, is a weakness to Fairy that other birds in this meta don't really have to worry about (at least not in terms of taking super effective damage). While the Flying Normals are more all-arounders, Vullaby is more of a specialist here.
- One of my favorite memories from early in my PvP analysis "career" was basically being bullied into writing an expansive analysis on LEDIAN by some Pokémon GO friends on Discord, and then being teased by many members of the early PvP community about it. This was in the days before XL Candy, so Ledian topped out at like 1350 CP then, making it a particuarly nutty venture. But hey, it CAN get to 1500 CP these days, though it's still mere spice and nowhere near meta. But if you took the plunge way back when... hey, this is the last month, right? YOLO!
- Mentioned a few times throughout this article, WOBBUFFET is honestly just alright, suffering from some of the same issues as DDeoxys... bulk and Counter alone don't get you so far in this particular meta. Not like they usually do! Wobb works, but this is not the time to build on from scratch, IMO. Smoke 'em if you already got 'em, sure.
And before I ramble on any further... that’s a wrap! Thanks for hanging with me to the end... of this article, of course, but also for the many of you that have followed and supported me for four and a half
years now. I appreciate and love you all. 💙
Before I go, one final extension of my thanks to my PvP friends, local and around the world, who have lent their own ideas and suggestions over the years and helped teach me to be a better player and student of the game. There are too many to list them all, but a few specific shout-outs to PvPoke, GO Battle Log, PvPIVs.com, PokeMiners, my old friends at GO Stadium for mutally getting each other off the ground in the pre-GBL days, and of course, one final time, to the good folks at The Silph Arena and The Silph Road. Krydos, Drock, Zooeys, the old Meta Team, Steeeeeeeeeeve, Myugenlol, and Dronpes for really launching this multi-year adventure by
reaching out to me in the first place, back in simpler times. And to those I ran out of time/brain capacity to mention... you know who you are. Thank you for being here along that journey and walking parts of that (Silph) road with me. And once more, my thanks to all of
you, dear readers, for your own encouragement, support, and patience with me over the years.
Okay, I said I wouldn't get sappy again, and specifically that I would NOT use this song, but I think I kind of
have to as a musical outro. So with apologies to Ol' Blue Eyes... well, I always HAVE done these reviews...
my way.
🎼
And now, the end is near ♫
And so we face the final curtain. ♪
My friends, I'll say it clear: ♬
I stated my case, of which I'm certain! ♫
And more, much more than this ♩
I wrote it myyyyyyy way! I hope you've enjoyed these analysis articles over the years as much as I've enjoyed preparing and sharing them with you!
All the best, my friends. I hope you have as many happy Silph Arena memories to hold on to as I do. To whatever comes next! Take care, Pokéfriends.
Don't cry because it's over. Smile, because it happened. — Dr. Seuss