15 kilos into pounds
Edmund Kemper
2018.09.30 18:21 HelloiamMiep Edmund Kemper
A subreddit about Edmund Kemper, his life, his crimes and anything related.
2012.04.01 11:48 trikstah Ever have Friends/BoyfriendORGirlfriend Show their TRUE/DRUNK sides?
2020.05.01 02:03 zumeius Community of the Jiralhanae
This is a community for those in the Jiralhanae Community, if you have questions on the Jiralhanae of Halo please ask away!
2023.05.30 23:18 bay30three "I’m a Melburnian but also a realist – Sydney is by far the better city" - SMH/The Age article
Link to article: https://www.smh.com.au/national/i-m-a-melburnian-but-also-a-realist-sydney-is-by-far-the-better-city-20230528-p5dbw0.html
Not sure if already posted, but this article in the SMH a couple of days ago made me chuckle.
Apologies if Sydney vs Melbourne debates are passé on this sub.
As a Sydneysider for 22 years who didn't grow up here (I'm from NZ), here are a couple of my observations re: Sydney vs Melbourne:
- Melburnians are generally a parochial bunch, and more vocal in debates about this 'rivalry' than Sydneysiders. They crave recognition, and latch onto any accolades they get (e.g. their 'most liveable city' award some years ago). You just won't see Sydneysiders regurgitating the recent 'best city to live in' award. And just weeks after the announcement that Melbourne had surpassed Sydney as the largest city on a technicality, many Melburnians are already trumpeting this as a point of pride.
- Sydney has a rich cultural life, which is underrecognised. I'm into classical music, and have been to 30+ concerts at the Sydney Opera House in the past 22 years. I'm going to another 3 this year, and tickets are just $35 to sit inside arguably the most famous venue for music in the world. I love all the small and large venues for concerts around the city, and not just in the CBD (Chatswood and Parramatta for example). I also love musical theatre, and have been to about 15 musicals so far in Sydney, in the four theatres we have (Capitol, Lyric, Royal, State). State Theatre in particular is majestic, and rivals any theatre in the world in its beauty IMO. I love our art galleries and never miss the Biennale and Head On photography exhibitions. There are more cultural events in this city (live shows, festivals, art and photography exhibitions, comedy, gigs, stadium concerts) than most people can keep up with.
- Sydney and Melbourne are more alike than most people care to admit (especially Melburnians). Both cities are cosmopolitan, safe and clean (by world standards), offer great food and drink options, have great public transport networks (despite recent glitches), have vibrant inner city suburbs that are a magnet for young people, sport in every code, and are envy of the world and easily in the top 10-20 cities in the world. Sydneysiders tend to be harsher critics of themselves (a fact I'm sure some of the replies may demonstrate), but as someone who grew up in a small city of 300K population, Sydney is still a dream come true, after 22 years.
submitted by bay30three to sydney [link] [comments]
Not sure if already posted, but this article in the SMH a couple of days ago made me chuckle.
Apologies if Sydney vs Melbourne debates are passé on this sub.
As a Sydneysider for 22 years who didn't grow up here (I'm from NZ), here are a couple of my observations re: Sydney vs Melbourne:
- Melburnians are generally a parochial bunch, and more vocal in debates about this 'rivalry' than Sydneysiders. They crave recognition, and latch onto any accolades they get (e.g. their 'most liveable city' award some years ago). You just won't see Sydneysiders regurgitating the recent 'best city to live in' award. And just weeks after the announcement that Melbourne had surpassed Sydney as the largest city on a technicality, many Melburnians are already trumpeting this as a point of pride.
- Sydney has a rich cultural life, which is underrecognised. I'm into classical music, and have been to 30+ concerts at the Sydney Opera House in the past 22 years. I'm going to another 3 this year, and tickets are just $35 to sit inside arguably the most famous venue for music in the world. I love all the small and large venues for concerts around the city, and not just in the CBD (Chatswood and Parramatta for example). I also love musical theatre, and have been to about 15 musicals so far in Sydney, in the four theatres we have (Capitol, Lyric, Royal, State). State Theatre in particular is majestic, and rivals any theatre in the world in its beauty IMO. I love our art galleries and never miss the Biennale and Head On photography exhibitions. There are more cultural events in this city (live shows, festivals, art and photography exhibitions, comedy, gigs, stadium concerts) than most people can keep up with.
- Sydney and Melbourne are more alike than most people care to admit (especially Melburnians). Both cities are cosmopolitan, safe and clean (by world standards), offer great food and drink options, have great public transport networks (despite recent glitches), have vibrant inner city suburbs that are a magnet for young people, sport in every code, and are envy of the world and easily in the top 10-20 cities in the world. Sydneysiders tend to be harsher critics of themselves (a fact I'm sure some of the replies may demonstrate), but as someone who grew up in a small city of 300K population, Sydney is still a dream come true, after 22 years.
2023.05.30 23:17 SpiderAlchemisT_3000 Trying to create a balanced barbarian subclass thats serves as a counter to mages
My dad got into D&D recently and me and him have been playing for a while and he has a really specific idea for a character. For those who've seen black clover think asta. For those who haven't essentially a barbarian subclass that specializes in countering magic and I have an idea of how it can work and but I wanna check with this subreddit to see if its decently balanced.
Lore wise: when so many mages use and abuse the weave and magic in genral there eventually is a push back from the weave itself creating a person made to defeat mages enter the Path of the Arcane Wrath
COMBATIVE CASTER Level 3: when this subclass is chosen the user has very limited access to spell casting being able to use mage hand, magic missile, spiritual weapon, and shielf of faith as well as having advantage on saving throws against spells
WRATH OF THE WEAVE Also when raging the barbarian gets the following extra benefits - he has resistance to spell damage - and when a spell technically misses he can use his reaction to reflect the spell back at the caster.
ARCANE ABSORPTION At sixth level when the barbarian is damaged by a spell he can use a reaction to halve the damage and then use the same spell up to a minute later with concentration
SPIRITUAL ASSISTANT At tenth level the barbarain can summon a energy copy of himself as a bonus action that has one health point and allows the barbarain to make a second action only being a melee attack from the assistant. Think limited echo knight fighter range is 15 ft
MAGIC NEGATION At 14th level the barbarian can make any spell cast have no effect 5 times and recharges these uses after a long rest
All spells that are psionic are not affected by the barbarian
So I wanna know what the more knowledgeable dnd veterans think about this potential subclass. Too strong too weak, sounds cool? What do you all think?
submitted by SpiderAlchemisT_3000 to DnD [link] [comments]
Lore wise: when so many mages use and abuse the weave and magic in genral there eventually is a push back from the weave itself creating a person made to defeat mages enter the Path of the Arcane Wrath
COMBATIVE CASTER Level 3: when this subclass is chosen the user has very limited access to spell casting being able to use mage hand, magic missile, spiritual weapon, and shielf of faith as well as having advantage on saving throws against spells
WRATH OF THE WEAVE Also when raging the barbarian gets the following extra benefits - he has resistance to spell damage - and when a spell technically misses he can use his reaction to reflect the spell back at the caster.
ARCANE ABSORPTION At sixth level when the barbarian is damaged by a spell he can use a reaction to halve the damage and then use the same spell up to a minute later with concentration
SPIRITUAL ASSISTANT At tenth level the barbarain can summon a energy copy of himself as a bonus action that has one health point and allows the barbarain to make a second action only being a melee attack from the assistant. Think limited echo knight fighter range is 15 ft
MAGIC NEGATION At 14th level the barbarian can make any spell cast have no effect 5 times and recharges these uses after a long rest
All spells that are psionic are not affected by the barbarian
So I wanna know what the more knowledgeable dnd veterans think about this potential subclass. Too strong too weak, sounds cool? What do you all think?
2023.05.30 23:17 Uniboss60 I can’t sympathise with my mother anymore.
So this is going to be long, so hang on for the ride. But I do need some advice going forward. So my mother and father have divorced for a long time but things haven’t really got better.
My dad lives with his new wife a couple streets away and I currently live with my mom (I am 20) with 2 other siblings (a brother who is 15 and a sis who is 7). We currently only visit my dad on Fridays as apparently my mom has said that my dad would not work out a weekly basis thing but I really think that’s because he works along with his wife.
Anyways, let me tell you how a normal week goes. We visit on Friday, my mom stops us from going early so we end up leaving the house at like 3-4pm and she starts calling us to not stay long into the night, so we end up coming at 8pm on average. My dad complains and says this is unfair, unfair that he only gets a couple hours.
One day my dad texted me and told me ‘come over to help him install a cupboard’, I wanted to go and my mom stopped me saying that my dad is trying to use me :/ Again I am 20…
When my mom decides not to cook and not order food she insists we go to my dad’s house for food which I decline because it makes me feel like I’m using him which I hope is understandable, then she gets worked up and says ‘why do you feel embarrassed’ etc.
My dad gives us a couple hundred monthly to help out with bills and all, so he gives me an envelope to give to my mom. I give it, and she gets angry and starts venting, saying ‘why do I need this’ etc.
She threatens to move countries to go live back with her parents and take my sister and I refute it saying that it’s unfair to take her away from her dad (she loves her dad so much) but she gets mad saying that ‘he’s done nothing for us’.
A couple weeks ago, my dad was on holiday and my sister wanted to call and talk to him, but my mom would say ‘no, I don’t want his problems’ like seriously? She always vents about him and my dad never vents about her which is ironic because she thinks he’s the one destroying the kids. She calls him a narcissist, she tells my sister bad things about my dad, ignores our opinions and thinks if we oppose any of her decisions it means we absolutely despise her.
She makes fun of my step mom’s cooking, she talks ill about my dad whenever, she thinks our dad hates us, she says that he puts me in depression.
Whether my dad was the bad one in the relationship between my parents it’s gone all out the window because of the way my mom acts now, it’s really sad.
What do you think is the solution or at least issue here? I’ve tried a lot of things but nothing works.
submitted by Uniboss60 to family [link] [comments]
My dad lives with his new wife a couple streets away and I currently live with my mom (I am 20) with 2 other siblings (a brother who is 15 and a sis who is 7). We currently only visit my dad on Fridays as apparently my mom has said that my dad would not work out a weekly basis thing but I really think that’s because he works along with his wife.
Anyways, let me tell you how a normal week goes. We visit on Friday, my mom stops us from going early so we end up leaving the house at like 3-4pm and she starts calling us to not stay long into the night, so we end up coming at 8pm on average. My dad complains and says this is unfair, unfair that he only gets a couple hours.
One day my dad texted me and told me ‘come over to help him install a cupboard’, I wanted to go and my mom stopped me saying that my dad is trying to use me :/ Again I am 20…
When my mom decides not to cook and not order food she insists we go to my dad’s house for food which I decline because it makes me feel like I’m using him which I hope is understandable, then she gets worked up and says ‘why do you feel embarrassed’ etc.
My dad gives us a couple hundred monthly to help out with bills and all, so he gives me an envelope to give to my mom. I give it, and she gets angry and starts venting, saying ‘why do I need this’ etc.
She threatens to move countries to go live back with her parents and take my sister and I refute it saying that it’s unfair to take her away from her dad (she loves her dad so much) but she gets mad saying that ‘he’s done nothing for us’.
A couple weeks ago, my dad was on holiday and my sister wanted to call and talk to him, but my mom would say ‘no, I don’t want his problems’ like seriously? She always vents about him and my dad never vents about her which is ironic because she thinks he’s the one destroying the kids. She calls him a narcissist, she tells my sister bad things about my dad, ignores our opinions and thinks if we oppose any of her decisions it means we absolutely despise her.
She makes fun of my step mom’s cooking, she talks ill about my dad whenever, she thinks our dad hates us, she says that he puts me in depression.
Whether my dad was the bad one in the relationship between my parents it’s gone all out the window because of the way my mom acts now, it’s really sad.
What do you think is the solution or at least issue here? I’ve tried a lot of things but nothing works.
2023.05.30 23:16 NETINT-Experts NETINT Quadra vs. NVIDIA T4 – Benchmarking Hardware Encoding Performance
 | This article is the second in a series about benchmarking hardware encoding performance. In the first article available, I delineated a procedure for testing hardware encoders. Specifically, I recommended this three-step procedure: submitted by NETINT-Experts to u/NETINT-Experts [link] [comments]
About The NVIDIA T4 The NVIDIA T4 is powered by NVIDIA Turing Tensor Cores and draws 70 watts in operation. Pricing varies by the reseller, with $2,299 around the median price, which puts it slightly higher than the $1,500 quoted for the NETINT Quadra T1 VPU in the previous article. In creating the command line for the NVIDIA encodes, I checked multiple NVIDIA documents, including a document entitled Video Benchmark Assumptions, this blog post entitled Turing H.264 Video Encoding Speed and Quality, and a document entitled Using FFmpeg with NVIDIA GPU Hardware Acceleration that requires a login. I readily admit that I am not an expert on NVIDIA encoding, but the point of this exercise is not absolute quality as much as the range of quality and throughput that all hardware enables. You should check these documents yourself and create your own version of the optimized command string. While there are many configuration options that impact quality and throughput, we focused our attention on two, lookahead and presets. As discussed in the previous article, the lookahead buffer allows the encoder to look at frames ahead of the frame being encoded, so it knows what is coming and can make more intelligent decisions. This improves encoding quality, particularly at and around scene changes, and it can improve bitrate efficiency. But lookahead adds latency equal to the lookahead duration, and it can decrease throughput. Note that while the NVIDIA documentation recommends a look-ahead buffer of twenty frames, I use 15 in my tests because, at 20, the hardware decoder kept crashing. I tested a 20-frame lookahead using software decoding, and the quality differential between 15 and 20 was inconsequential, so this shouldn’t impact the comparative results. I also tested using various NVIDIA presets, which, like all encoding presets, trade-off quality vs. throughput. To measure quality, I computed the VMAF harmonic mean and low-frame scores, the latter a measure of transient quality. For throughput, I tested the number of simultaneous 1080p30 files the hardware could process at 30 fps. I divided the stream count into price and watts/hour to determine cost/stream and watts/stream. As you can see in Table 1, I tested with a lookahead value of 15 for selected presets 1-9, and then with a 0 lookahead for preset 9. Line two shows the closest x264 equivalent score for perspective. In terms of operating point for comparing to Quadra, I choose the lookahead 15/preset 4 configurations, which yielded twice the throughput of preset 2 with only a minor reduction in VMAF Harmonic mean. We will consider low-frame scores in the final comparisons. In general, the presets worked as they should, with higher quality and lower throughput at the left end, and the reverse at the right end, though LA15/P4 performance was an anomaly since it produced lower quality and higher throughput than LA15/P6. In addition, dropping the lookahead buffer did not produce the performance increase that we saw with Quadra, though it also did not produce a significant quality decrease. TABLE 1. H.264 OPTIONS AND RESULTS. Table 2 shows the T4’s HEVC results. Though quality was again near the medium x265 preset with several combinations, throughput was very modest at 3 or 4 streams at that quality level. For HEVC, LA15/P4 stands out as the optimal configuration, with four times or better throughput than other combinations with higher-quality output. In terms of expected preset behavior, LA15/P4 was again quite the anomaly, producing the highest throughput in the test suite with slightly lower quality than LA15/P6, which should deliver lower quality. Again, switching from LA 15 to LA 0 produced neither the expected spike in throughput nor a drop in quality, as we saw with the Quadra for both HEVC and H.264. TABLE 2. HEVC OPTIONS AND RESULTS. Quadra vs. T4 Now that we have identified the operating points for Quadra and the T4, let us compare quality, throughput, CAPEX, and OPEX. You see the data for H.264 in Table 3. Here, the stream count was the same, so Quadra’s advantage in cost per stream and watts per stream related to its lower cost and more efficient operation. At their respective operating points, the Quadra’s VMAF harmonic mean quality was slightly higher, with a more significant advantage in the low-frame score, a predictor of transient quality problems. TABLE 3. COMPARING QUADRA AND T4 AT H.264 OPERATING POINTS. Table 4 shows the same comparison for HEVC. Here, Quadra output 75% more streams than the T4, which increases the cost per stream and watts per stream advantages. VMAF harmonic means scores were again very similar, though the T4’s low frame score was substantially lower. TABLE 4. COMPARING QUADRA AND T4 AT HEVC OPERATING POINTS. Figure 5 illustrates the low-frames and low-frame differential between the two files. It is the result plot from the Moscow State University Video Quality Measurement Tool (VQMT), which displays the VMAF score, frame-by-frame, over the entire duration of the two video files analyzed, with Quadra in red and the T4 in green. The top window shows the VMAF comparison for the entire two files, while the bottom window is a close-up of the highlighted region of the top window, right around the most significant downward spike at frame 1590. FIGURE 5. THE DOWNWARD GREEN SPIKES REPRESENT THE LOW-FRAME SCORES IN THE T4 ENCODE. As you can see in the bottom window in Figure 5, the low-frame region extends for 2-3 frames, which might be borderline noticeable by a discerning viewer. Figure 6 shows a close-up of the lowest quality frame, Quadra on the left, T4 on the right, and the dramatic difference in VMAF score, 87.95 to 57, is certainly warranted. Not surprisingly, PSNR and SSIM measurements confirmed these low frames. FIGURE 6. QUALITY COMPARISONS, NETINT QUADRA ON THE LEFT, T4 ON THE RIGHT. It is useful to track low frames because if they extend beyond 2-3 frames, they become noticeable to viewers and can degrade viewer's quality of experience. Mathematically, in a two-minute test file, the impact of even 10 – 15 terrible frames on the overall score is negligible. That is why it is always useful to visualize the metric scores with a tool like VQMT rather than simply relying on a single score. Summing Up Overall, you should consider the procedure discussed in this and the previous article as the most important takeaway from these two articles. I am not an expert in encoding with NVIDIA hardware, and the results from a single or even a limited number of files can be idiosyncratic. Do your own research, test your own files, and draw your own conclusions. As stated in the previous article, do not be impressed by quality scores without knowing the throughput, and expect that impressive throughput numbers may be accompanied by a significant drop in quality. Whenever you test any hardware encoder, identify the most important quality/throughput configuration options, test over the relevant range, and choose the operating point that delivers the best combination of quality and throughput. This will give the best chance to achieve a meaningful apple vs. apples comparison between different hardware encoders that incorporates quality, cost per stream, and watts per stream. Discover more here: https://netint.com/resources/blog/ #NETINT #ASIC #Encoding #LiveStreaming |
2023.05.30 23:13 schmoooozlirr I am a pathological liar and an awful son
I (19m) have struggled all my life with anxiety, depression, adhd, and lying. As a kid I would do it in order to simply get out of trouble but as I got older I would do it for fear of small things. Other than that I had the highest grades, reading comprehension, artistic prowess, and math skills until 5th grade. Afterwards I went from gifted to failing constantly. Detentions, principals office, skipping classes and smoking weed. At the height of my depression I was 15 and after hounding my mom over and over that I felt like something was wrong with me I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression. Then I was tossed back into school and nothing changed. I barely graduated, went to college, failed college, and then went to barber school to learn a trade. This is where things are beginning to get worse. After asking my parents for upwards of two years i finally decided to go into the doctor’s myself where I was diagnosed with adhd. Shortly after this i was kicked out of barber school for missing 12 hours out of 1500 and now I want to die. Ive been trying to move out for a while but my parents are very against it because they want me to stay at home and save more money. I am moving close to my college which is decently far to retry but this time i made an agreement that my parents would pay for class but i would pay for the ones I failed. Now im scared to tell them about barber school (which i am paying half of ($16,000)) I wish I was never born to be so careless. Im scared the college deal is going to go under and Im scared this will make me the screw up.
submitted by schmoooozlirr to TrueOffMyChest [link] [comments]
2023.05.30 23:12 winndixie A 25-year old Managing Director applies the best from the East and the West in a podcast interview
Rick Hu, who became the youngest Managing Director of Northwestern Mutual at the age of 25, was the keynote speaker at the Asian Hustle Network conference that happened last month in Vegas.
My friend also interviewed him on his podcast. I wanted to share some highlights on what resonated with me:
Imposter syndrome - imagine what it felt like being a 25-year old Managing Director in a room full of 50-year old white men. Rick struggled at first but eventually led his office to becoming the number one district of the company.
Relationship with your parents - Rick earned the respect of his parents through success. At the same time, he remained humble. He was able to build a relationship with his immigrant parents on equal footing and shared with them the abundance over scarcity mindset.
Being uncomfortable - he cites his successes to his failures, which he goes into deep (like getting put on probation in his first job). It’s amazing how far he’s come.
I think this story is pretty closely tied to the Asian American experience and it’s good to have a role model like Rick to learn from: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/afterhourprojects/episodes/Episode-15-Rick-Hu-Mindset-Matters-e24sn74
submitted by winndixie to asianamerican [link] [comments]
My friend also interviewed him on his podcast. I wanted to share some highlights on what resonated with me:
Imposter syndrome - imagine what it felt like being a 25-year old Managing Director in a room full of 50-year old white men. Rick struggled at first but eventually led his office to becoming the number one district of the company.
Relationship with your parents - Rick earned the respect of his parents through success. At the same time, he remained humble. He was able to build a relationship with his immigrant parents on equal footing and shared with them the abundance over scarcity mindset.
Being uncomfortable - he cites his successes to his failures, which he goes into deep (like getting put on probation in his first job). It’s amazing how far he’s come.
I think this story is pretty closely tied to the Asian American experience and it’s good to have a role model like Rick to learn from: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/afterhourprojects/episodes/Episode-15-Rick-Hu-Mindset-Matters-e24sn74
2023.05.30 23:11 winndixie Thoughts from becoming a Managing Director at 25 on Asian Mindset
A bro recently interviewed an asian brother, Rick Hu, who became the youngest Managing Director of Northwestern Mutual at the age of 25.
I met Rick and I respect him immensely. I’m sharing a bit about the episode so that others can get to know him.
Rick Hu, who currently runs his own wealth management firm called Midas Wealth, rose through the ranks in finance, taking his Manhattan Chinatown office of Northwestern Mutual and pushing it to the number one district office within five years.
Not only that, he’s one of us. He genuinely cares and wants to give back.
The conversation in the podcast resonated with me on two points: 1) imposter syndrome and 2) becoming uncomfortable.
Rick was a 25-year old Managing Director in a room full of 50-year old white men. He heard others talk about him as a “diversity hire” and struggled with the gap he saw between himself and them. But he embraced his eastern heritage and operated with hospitality (inviting clients into his home) and became so successful that his other Managing Directors wanted to be like him.
He also pushed himself as an introvert to socialize. He set a goal to meet a new stranger on the subway each day before arriving at work and after trial and error, he pulled it off.
As a fellow logical introvert, this spoke to me. I’m glad Rick came on and I’m sharing the link to the episode here: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/afterhourprojects/episodes/Episode-15-Rick-Hu-Mindset-Matters-e24sn74
submitted by winndixie to AsianMasculinity [link] [comments]
I met Rick and I respect him immensely. I’m sharing a bit about the episode so that others can get to know him.
Rick Hu, who currently runs his own wealth management firm called Midas Wealth, rose through the ranks in finance, taking his Manhattan Chinatown office of Northwestern Mutual and pushing it to the number one district office within five years.
Not only that, he’s one of us. He genuinely cares and wants to give back.
The conversation in the podcast resonated with me on two points: 1) imposter syndrome and 2) becoming uncomfortable.
Rick was a 25-year old Managing Director in a room full of 50-year old white men. He heard others talk about him as a “diversity hire” and struggled with the gap he saw between himself and them. But he embraced his eastern heritage and operated with hospitality (inviting clients into his home) and became so successful that his other Managing Directors wanted to be like him.
He also pushed himself as an introvert to socialize. He set a goal to meet a new stranger on the subway each day before arriving at work and after trial and error, he pulled it off.
As a fellow logical introvert, this spoke to me. I’m glad Rick came on and I’m sharing the link to the episode here: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/afterhourprojects/episodes/Episode-15-Rick-Hu-Mindset-Matters-e24sn74
2023.05.30 23:10 deeptechsharing VA – Defected Ibiza 2023 June 2023
Artist: VA Title: Defected Ibiza 2023 June 2023 Genre: House, Tech House, Deep House, Dance / Electro Pop, Afro House, Melodic House & Techno, Minimal / Deep Tech, Nu Disco / Disco Release Date: 2023-05-31
DOWNLOAD in 320kbps: https://sharing-db.club/djs-chart/436304_va-defected-ibiza-2023-june-2023/
Tracklist: 1. ANOTR, Abel Balder – Relax My Eyes (3:12) 2. Butch, Nic Fanciulli – I Want You (3:07) 3. Jansons – Nite Life (Original Mix) (5:00) 4. HoneyLuv, Seth Troxler, Paul Johnson – Sex & The City (MK Remix) (3:07) 5. PRUNK, Rona Ray – Keep It Simple (3:04) 6. HoneyLuv, Dope Earth Alien – Sway (feat. Dope Earth Alien) (2:47) 7. Majestic, Sara Sukkha – Dance All Night (feat. Sara Sukkha) (3:22) 8. Chris Stussy – All Night Long (3:54) 9. Michael Bibi, KinAhau, Audio Bullys – Different Side (3:13) 10. Floorplan – We Give Thee Honor (3:11) 11. Jack Swift – Can I Wait (5:48) 12. Mihalis Safras, Yvan Genkins – Las Solteras (4:00) 13. Joshwa – Bass Go Boom (2:58) 14. Shouse, Dennis Ferrer, Seth Troxler – (still) WON’T4GETU (6:14) 15. Larse – A Part Of (Riva Starr Saturn Mix) (3:25) 16. Kitty Amor, SomaDina – I Saw An Angel On The Roof & Wept (Kitty Amor ‘s Remix) (3:03) 17. Manda Moor – Picante (5:44) 18. MK, Dom Dolla – Rhyme Dust (3:01) 19. Cajmere, Dajaé, Marco Lys – Brighter Days (Marco Lys Remix) (6:22) 20. Mason Collective – A Little Affection (2:22) 21. Sam Divine, Hayley May – Face In The Crowd (3:04) 22. Radio Slave – Wild Life (Disco Mix) (5:49) 23. The Shapeshifters – Lola’s Theme (VIP) (7:18) 24. George Davis – Marimba Disco (Kai Alcé’s NDATL Interpretation) (6:37) 25. Tuccillo, Howard Perry – I Believe (feat. Howard Perry) (7:44) 26. Chloé Caillet, Falle Nioke, Wekafore – In The Middle feat. Falle Nioke & Wekaforé (3:37) 27. Hannah Wants, Ara – The One (feat. ARA) (2:57) 28. Cevin Fisher – Love You Some More (Harry Romero Remix) (3:25) 29. G Club, Banda Sonora – Guitarra G (8:46) 30. Dateless – Geekin (3:35) 31. Wallace – Breaking Up (5:38) 32. Melé – Groove La Afrika (2:49) 33. Angelo Ferreri – A Chance (3:13) 34. Ben Rau – You Got Me Running (6:07) 35. Darius Syrossian, George Smeddles – Back In The Dance (3:26) 36. Kolter – I Feel It Right (3:04) 37. Archie Hamilton, HQA – Let The Light In (feat. HQA) (3:08) 38. Jaden Thompson – Memories (7:17) 39. Jamie Jones – My Paradise (3:31) 40. Route 94 – Clapped (3:30) 41. Boogie Vice, Deep Aztec – Promises (N-You-Up Dub Mix) (3:40) 42. Kerri Chandler, Dreamer G – Hurry Up [Ministry of Sound] (Kerri’s Again Mix) (6:55) 43. Renato Cohen – Suddenly Funk (Andrea Oliva Remix) (3:58) 44. Low Steppa, Crusy – BFG (Extended Mix) (5:42) 45. Marco Lys – The Story Continues (4:50) 46. Melé, Toure Kunda – Talkin’ Drums (3:00) 47. Airborn Gav, Hurricane – Work (Atjazz Remix) (4:10) 48. Joeski – Afro Latinism (6:54) 49. Jovonn – RAISE UP (Raise Up High) (5:47) 50. Riva Starr, Mike Dunn – Feel The Heat (feat. Mike Dunn) (2:51) 51. Dennis Cruz – Una Rumbita (5:44) 52. salute, Sammy Virji – Peach (5:45) 53. Hannah Wants, Clementine Douglas – Cure My Desire (feat. Clementine Douglas) (2:59) 54. Atmos Blaq – Kwa Mama (6:30) 55. Made By Pete – Horizon Red (Extended) (7:07) 56. Cristoph, Awen – Time (4:18) 57. Ezel, Rona Ray – History Repeating (7:31) 58. Franky Rizardo, Ros T, T-Connection – Do What You Wanna Do (Live It Cool) (3:26) 59. Simon Kidzoo – 1 Thang (Original Mix) (3:21) 60. Riva Starr – Flying High (2:59) 61. The Martinez Brothers, Tokischa, Beltran – KILO (Beltran Remix) (4:07) 62. Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaurs, Redlight – Regulate (2:34) 63. Jovonn, Prunk, M-High – Story Of House (Original Mix) (6:43) 64. A’Studio, Polina – SOS (feat. Polina) (Skylark Remix – Nic Fanciulli Edit) (3:24) 65. Mr. V – Mr. Bongo (Hello Children) (Butch Remix) (4:00) 66. Masters At Work – MAW Apes Groove (6:22) 67. Yours – IN THE MORNING (3:06) 68. Eddie Fowlkes – AHYEE (4:09) 69. Dennis Cruz, Martina Camargo – El Sueño (feat. Martina Camargo) (5:48) 70. Makez, dreamcastmoe – Phases (feat. dreamcastmoe) (VIP Mix) (4:35) 71. Radio Slave, NEZ – Wait A Minute (Dixon Extension) (6:27) 72. Yours – CALLING (3:30) 73. Ben Rau, Oden & Fatzo – Calling Out Your Name (I Can’t Sleep) (Oden & Fatzo Remix) (4:10) 74. Dirty Channels – Make You Cry (4:11) 75. Tensnake – Coma Cat (Chloé Caillet Remix) (3:35) 76. Francis Mercier, Nitefreak, Idd Aziz – Kamili (3:46) 77. Dennis Quin – Dedication To House Music (3:30) 78. Roach Motel – Movin’ On (Darius Syrossian 5am Remix) (3:14) 79. Eats Everything, Shezar – Get Up (3:06) 80. Low Steppa – The Feeling (Edit) (3:17) 81. Harry Romero, Inaya Day – Just Can’t Get Enough (Jamie Jones Edit) (3:28) 82. Shermanology – Souljack (3:44) 83. Arielle Free – You Can’t Stop Me (Edit) (4:05) 84. Classmatic, Nfasis – Toma Dale (5:23) 85. Junior Sanchez, NEZ – Hit It (feat. NEZ) (3:41) 86. Oden & Fatzo – Lauren (I Can’t Stay Forever) (3:20) 87. Todd Terry, Meca, Volkoder, Tristan Henry – Little Woman (feat. Tristan Henry) (3:48) 88. Mr. G – U Feel Mi (Kai Alce’s New Feel) (5:25) 89. Honey Dijon, Dope Earth Alien – It’s Quiet Now (feat. Dope Earth Alien) (3:02) 90. S.A.M., Sarah Ikumu – Spotlight (feat. Sarah Ikumu) (Sam Divine Remix) (2:45)
submitted by deeptechsharing to u/deeptechsharing [link] [comments]
DOWNLOAD in 320kbps: https://sharing-db.club/djs-chart/436304_va-defected-ibiza-2023-june-2023/
Tracklist: 1. ANOTR, Abel Balder – Relax My Eyes (3:12) 2. Butch, Nic Fanciulli – I Want You (3:07) 3. Jansons – Nite Life (Original Mix) (5:00) 4. HoneyLuv, Seth Troxler, Paul Johnson – Sex & The City (MK Remix) (3:07) 5. PRUNK, Rona Ray – Keep It Simple (3:04) 6. HoneyLuv, Dope Earth Alien – Sway (feat. Dope Earth Alien) (2:47) 7. Majestic, Sara Sukkha – Dance All Night (feat. Sara Sukkha) (3:22) 8. Chris Stussy – All Night Long (3:54) 9. Michael Bibi, KinAhau, Audio Bullys – Different Side (3:13) 10. Floorplan – We Give Thee Honor (3:11) 11. Jack Swift – Can I Wait (5:48) 12. Mihalis Safras, Yvan Genkins – Las Solteras (4:00) 13. Joshwa – Bass Go Boom (2:58) 14. Shouse, Dennis Ferrer, Seth Troxler – (still) WON’T4GETU (6:14) 15. Larse – A Part Of (Riva Starr Saturn Mix) (3:25) 16. Kitty Amor, SomaDina – I Saw An Angel On The Roof & Wept (Kitty Amor ‘s Remix) (3:03) 17. Manda Moor – Picante (5:44) 18. MK, Dom Dolla – Rhyme Dust (3:01) 19. Cajmere, Dajaé, Marco Lys – Brighter Days (Marco Lys Remix) (6:22) 20. Mason Collective – A Little Affection (2:22) 21. Sam Divine, Hayley May – Face In The Crowd (3:04) 22. Radio Slave – Wild Life (Disco Mix) (5:49) 23. The Shapeshifters – Lola’s Theme (VIP) (7:18) 24. George Davis – Marimba Disco (Kai Alcé’s NDATL Interpretation) (6:37) 25. Tuccillo, Howard Perry – I Believe (feat. Howard Perry) (7:44) 26. Chloé Caillet, Falle Nioke, Wekafore – In The Middle feat. Falle Nioke & Wekaforé (3:37) 27. Hannah Wants, Ara – The One (feat. ARA) (2:57) 28. Cevin Fisher – Love You Some More (Harry Romero Remix) (3:25) 29. G Club, Banda Sonora – Guitarra G (8:46) 30. Dateless – Geekin (3:35) 31. Wallace – Breaking Up (5:38) 32. Melé – Groove La Afrika (2:49) 33. Angelo Ferreri – A Chance (3:13) 34. Ben Rau – You Got Me Running (6:07) 35. Darius Syrossian, George Smeddles – Back In The Dance (3:26) 36. Kolter – I Feel It Right (3:04) 37. Archie Hamilton, HQA – Let The Light In (feat. HQA) (3:08) 38. Jaden Thompson – Memories (7:17) 39. Jamie Jones – My Paradise (3:31) 40. Route 94 – Clapped (3:30) 41. Boogie Vice, Deep Aztec – Promises (N-You-Up Dub Mix) (3:40) 42. Kerri Chandler, Dreamer G – Hurry Up [Ministry of Sound] (Kerri’s Again Mix) (6:55) 43. Renato Cohen – Suddenly Funk (Andrea Oliva Remix) (3:58) 44. Low Steppa, Crusy – BFG (Extended Mix) (5:42) 45. Marco Lys – The Story Continues (4:50) 46. Melé, Toure Kunda – Talkin’ Drums (3:00) 47. Airborn Gav, Hurricane – Work (Atjazz Remix) (4:10) 48. Joeski – Afro Latinism (6:54) 49. Jovonn – RAISE UP (Raise Up High) (5:47) 50. Riva Starr, Mike Dunn – Feel The Heat (feat. Mike Dunn) (2:51) 51. Dennis Cruz – Una Rumbita (5:44) 52. salute, Sammy Virji – Peach (5:45) 53. Hannah Wants, Clementine Douglas – Cure My Desire (feat. Clementine Douglas) (2:59) 54. Atmos Blaq – Kwa Mama (6:30) 55. Made By Pete – Horizon Red (Extended) (7:07) 56. Cristoph, Awen – Time (4:18) 57. Ezel, Rona Ray – History Repeating (7:31) 58. Franky Rizardo, Ros T, T-Connection – Do What You Wanna Do (Live It Cool) (3:26) 59. Simon Kidzoo – 1 Thang (Original Mix) (3:21) 60. Riva Starr – Flying High (2:59) 61. The Martinez Brothers, Tokischa, Beltran – KILO (Beltran Remix) (4:07) 62. Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaurs, Redlight – Regulate (2:34) 63. Jovonn, Prunk, M-High – Story Of House (Original Mix) (6:43) 64. A’Studio, Polina – SOS (feat. Polina) (Skylark Remix – Nic Fanciulli Edit) (3:24) 65. Mr. V – Mr. Bongo (Hello Children) (Butch Remix) (4:00) 66. Masters At Work – MAW Apes Groove (6:22) 67. Yours – IN THE MORNING (3:06) 68. Eddie Fowlkes – AHYEE (4:09) 69. Dennis Cruz, Martina Camargo – El Sueño (feat. Martina Camargo) (5:48) 70. Makez, dreamcastmoe – Phases (feat. dreamcastmoe) (VIP Mix) (4:35) 71. Radio Slave, NEZ – Wait A Minute (Dixon Extension) (6:27) 72. Yours – CALLING (3:30) 73. Ben Rau, Oden & Fatzo – Calling Out Your Name (I Can’t Sleep) (Oden & Fatzo Remix) (4:10) 74. Dirty Channels – Make You Cry (4:11) 75. Tensnake – Coma Cat (Chloé Caillet Remix) (3:35) 76. Francis Mercier, Nitefreak, Idd Aziz – Kamili (3:46) 77. Dennis Quin – Dedication To House Music (3:30) 78. Roach Motel – Movin’ On (Darius Syrossian 5am Remix) (3:14) 79. Eats Everything, Shezar – Get Up (3:06) 80. Low Steppa – The Feeling (Edit) (3:17) 81. Harry Romero, Inaya Day – Just Can’t Get Enough (Jamie Jones Edit) (3:28) 82. Shermanology – Souljack (3:44) 83. Arielle Free – You Can’t Stop Me (Edit) (4:05) 84. Classmatic, Nfasis – Toma Dale (5:23) 85. Junior Sanchez, NEZ – Hit It (feat. NEZ) (3:41) 86. Oden & Fatzo – Lauren (I Can’t Stay Forever) (3:20) 87. Todd Terry, Meca, Volkoder, Tristan Henry – Little Woman (feat. Tristan Henry) (3:48) 88. Mr. G – U Feel Mi (Kai Alce’s New Feel) (5:25) 89. Honey Dijon, Dope Earth Alien – It’s Quiet Now (feat. Dope Earth Alien) (3:02) 90. S.A.M., Sarah Ikumu – Spotlight (feat. Sarah Ikumu) (Sam Divine Remix) (2:45)
2023.05.30 23:09 Dramatic-Surprise251 10+ years of debilitating health issues solved!
I’m 27. When I was 13/14, I started having weird throat issues all the time. It felt like my throat had a lot of pressure in it, like a weird tension feeling, and the only thing that helped was when I ate/drank something or swallowed. This would help then it would come back a few minutes or so later. I had weird issues swallowing saliva too. I saw an ear nose & throat doctor about this and was told my issue was acid reflux. Doctor prescribed reflux medication and told me to sleep on an incline. I did those things for a while, but it didn’t help. Supposedly I was treating the issue and the doctor didn’t know why I wasn’t improving but told me to continue doing what I was doing to supposedly treat it. I saw some other doctors that weren’t sure either. I pretty much learned to just live like that but it was annoying and started to take over my life to the point that every day revolved around coping with my throat and dealing with the bad anxiety it was causing. I used to avoid things, had no life, had to make sure I always had something to drink to help my throat, and felt really stressed about the whole thing and how it was affecting me. On a side note, I also used to breathe mostly through my mouth as well. No one really knew, but I was really miserable all the time because of this stuff.
At 15, I started to feel like a brain fog on top of the throat issues. Something I’d never felt before. It was like my brain felt like mush all the time, no matter how much sleep I got. Like that feeling when you sleep really bad for a couple nights and feel like crap, except I was sleeping enough. Felt kind of spaced out constantly, couldn’t concentrate as well, I never wanted to do anything, felt apathetic, and just kind of crappy all the time. Wasn’t severe but was definitely impacting my day to day life. I went back to seeing doctors. Lots of doctors said there was nothing medically wrong with me and some even said that the brain fog (and maybe even the throat issues) were all psychological. I didn’t feel like that was it because my symptoms felt so real and physical but what did I know. I was prescribed antidepressants and doctors recommended I see a therapist for bad anxiety issues. I spent the next couple of years trying multiple medications, seeing therapists, and making other changes but nothing helped. I thought I was going crazy. In those few years that passed, I had slowly started to feel worse. By the time I graduated high school, the constant mental fog and tiredness were affecting me pretty bad. I felt stressed and anxious nonstop. I had almost no life during high school because of it and did just the bare minimum to get by. With lots of doctors telling me there was nothing physically wrong with me, I started to believe them about it being all mental. I thought it was something I was doing wrong personally. At this point I wasn’t even talking to my family about it as much since supposedly there was nothing wrong and it was all in my head. Especially when doctor after doctor were saying nothing was wrong and because my symptoms were mostly feeling tired all the time, what was I supposed to say? It felt like it was my personal fault for feeling the way I did. Everyone gave me the impression that my issues were because of me and I just needed to change my mindset and lifestyle and I’d feel better. Do anxiety workbooks, deep breathing, get more sleep, take antidepressants, therapy. I did every single thing doctors and therapists told me to do, but nothing helped. Doctors and therapists made me question my sanity every day. It was hell.
I was in no shape to go to college out of state, but I did. I ended up going because supposedly there was nothing wrong with me and I was trying desperately to believe it was all in my head like doctors and therapists and my family were saying. I just needed to change my way of thinking and lifestyle and that would cure the constant brain fog and tiredness and throat issues. So I pushed myself to go, hoping I’d sort it out. I spent the next 4 years slowly feeling worse, still seeing doctors but getting no legit answers. I'd go months and months at a time without seeing a doctor as I didn't know where to turn and had given up at times. I saw a doctor about sleep apnea but didn't seem to fit almost any of the symptoms. Stuff like waking up trying to get air, choking, stopping breathing, snoring, wasn't overweight, wasn't unhealthy, didn’t have a family history of it or other health issues. Still, I tried one of those moldable mouthpieces that’s supposed to help with sleep apnea but didn't see any benefit from it. So with all of this, I figured it’s probably not sleep apnea. I was so desperate, I was constantly trying all sorts of medications, supplements, and other weird things to try and help myself. I felt like I was losing my damn mind. My mental health was horrendous. Felt like crap 24/7. I literally felt stupid because my brain wasn’t working. Dealing with symptoms and figuring out what was wrong with me consumed my entire life. I would occasionally go to class after taking a big dose of stimulant drugs, but even those only did so much. No amount of caffeine pills, energy drinks did anything either. I was beyond that stuff helping. I experienced almost nothing enjoyable in those 4 years of college and had basically no life, really no friends, hobbies, nothing. Really the only experience I had during college was when I went on a study abroad trip but it was hell because I felt so awful the whole time. I had also joined a fraternity in the beginning of college but did almost nothing with them for the same reason. The mental tiredness had gotten so bad it felt like I was disconnected and living in a dream. Like I felt kind of drunk. I was so mentally and emotionally numb and exhausted I didn’t even feel human. Like I physically could not feel emotions and felt super spaced out. I was also still dealing with the throat issues. I’d get random dizziness, my vision got worse (more sensitive to bright light, bad floaters in my eyes). I somehow managed to graduate college and finished feeling significantly worse than when I began. I was so miserable and had no one to talk to about what was going on. But I was at least glad that college was over, because it sucked horribly.
I spent the next year doing just the bare minimum to get by. About a year after college (2019), I had a sleep study done and results came back with moderate sleep apnea. For the first time I actually had an answer. Sleep doctor immediately prescribed a CPAP machine. Didn’t even bother to wonder why a young healthy person has sleep apnea to begin with, because it’s not normal. I spent the next 2ish years trying multiple machines, masks, changing all the settings, but only saw some improvement. Keeping the CPAP consistently on throughout the night was also a struggle in itself as it was super awkward and uncomfortable, even though I was desperately trying to make it work. When I was able to keep it on for 5+ hours a night I felt a bit better but it was really difficult to do so consistently. During this time I couldn’t really hold down a job, other than some really basic, short term jobs. And even those felt brutal. My relationships with everyone were affected pretty bad. I was a complete zombie because the tiredness was so overwhelming. It was as an amount of brain fog and exhaustion I didn’t know was humanly possible. I was making myself basically sick with stimulants that really weren't helping and even had a doctor at one point tell me that I should get genetic testing for depression or have my brain zapped with electric shocks. I luckily didn't go that route.
After two years of messing with machines, my sleep doctor then recommended I see a maxillofacial doctor to see what the underlying breathing issue was being caused by. The doctor recommended I get a custom mouthpiece made that shifts the lower jaw forward to help open the airway to prevent breathing issues while sleeping. The process of having it fitted and made took a couple months. I even took a “real” job during this same time because I had two different doctors telling me that this mouthpiece was likely to help me a lot. I felt like I couldn’t have gotten the mouthpiece fast enough. I ended up messing with the mouthpiece for months and had no benefit at all. Literally zero. The dentist who made the mouthpiece said that the mouthpiece wasn’t helping because I might just have “weak muscle tone” in my throat and that I should see someone called a myofunctional doctor to supposedly improve muscle tone in the throat and tongue. I looked into that and it seemed like total quack stuff so I didn’t do it and completely dropped that dentist that made my mouthpiece and suggested this. I then saw an ear nose and throat doctor and later did a sleep endoscopy with him where I was put to sleep and had my breathing monitored with a camera down my throat. The doctor said that my breathing issues were being caused by my throat and jaw and suggested that since the mouthpiece wasn’t helping, I could get surgery or have a device called Inspire surgically inserted into my chest and neck to artificially help breathing. I held off on that cause it sounded pretty extreme and thought there had to be something else. During this time I had to leave the job I should’ve never taken in the first place because I was so non-functional.
I pretty much gave up for months. I eventually scheduled an appointment with another ear nose & throat doctor (the same kind of doctor I saw when I was 13). I'd already seen many ear nose & throat doctors by this point but didn't know what else to do. Don’t remember how exactly it happened, but the connection was made that my issues were due to really abnormal nasal breathing. Something called nasal valve stenosis, where both sides of my nose were completely caving in and blocking most air, leading to crappy breathing, even when just breathing in lightly. This issue is worse during sleep and was causing my brain to “wake up” every time my nose had the obstruction. So I was struggling to breathe all night and I was slowly feeling worse as I was never getting good deep sleep. So the bad sleep every night just kept accumulating over the course of 10+ years. He also explained that my throat issues were a sign that my nose wasn’t functioning normally, which was causing airflow issues and a throat pressure feeling as a result. But weirdly the nasal issues weren’t being caused by my nose itself. There’s nothing actually wrong with my nose. It’s the middle part of the face that provides the base and support for the nose that is lacking the support needed to keep the nose open for normal breathing. Doctor said it’s really abnormal for nasal collapse to happen like this as a result of the face just not developing properly. It was just the way the middle of my face grew and changed over time, especially during puberty, that led to this. Doctor said it is called midface deficiency. It’s the area of the face just to the sides of the nose, below the eyes. Doctor said facial surgery is really what I needed but said nasal surgery could potentially help a bit and is less intense of a surgery, so I decided to go with that. Everything finally made sense for the first time ever. I even recorded my sleep and sure enough I could hear myself struggling to breathe all night.
Last year (2022), I had nasal valve surgery. It took a long time to recover from surgery and I still have to wear something in my nose when I sleep to prevent it from pinching shut because the surgery only helped a bit. I will still have to look into facial surgery to address the underlying issue as my breathing is still horrible during the day when I’m not wearing a dilator in my nose but at night I wear it and am good. Over time most of my issues have gone away. The slowly worsening exhaustion and brain fog and cognitive issues that started when I was a teenager. The constant severe anxiety and stress feelings I had since I was a kid. Throat issues gone. I no longer feel like killing myself out of misery. It was that obvious all along but untreated made my life constant fucking torture. Feeling horrible nonstop, slowly getting worse, not knowing why, being told there was nothing wrong with me and that it was all psychological, trying all sorts of things with no benefit, and having my entire life be ruined was a mental hell I wouldn’t wish on anyone. I don’t feel like my teens and most my 20s actually happened because I was in such poor health physically and mentally 24/7. I wish I had been able to see decent doctors earlier, but obviously that didn’t happen. I’m not even sure how I wasn’t able to make the connection myself. I think I was just so used to really bad breathing since I was young I didn’t know it was abnormal and had no reason to think I had some weird issue cause why would I? I still struggle with the mental effects of I think living like this for so long. These issues consumed everything for over 10 years so I guess it’s not surprising that it still affects me mentally even after the fact. Thanks for reading and hopefully this can help someone out there.
TLDR: Slowly worsening chronic fatigue/brain fog and other issues for 10+ years was due to really bad nasal breathing, mostly nasal valve collapse due to midface deficiency that developed when I was a teenager and was leading to sleep apnea
Here's photos of my nose just breathing in slightly deeper than normal:
https://imgur.com/aQWsJeX
https://imgur.com/a/7NsNIWo
submitted by Dramatic-Surprise251 to breathwork [link] [comments]
At 15, I started to feel like a brain fog on top of the throat issues. Something I’d never felt before. It was like my brain felt like mush all the time, no matter how much sleep I got. Like that feeling when you sleep really bad for a couple nights and feel like crap, except I was sleeping enough. Felt kind of spaced out constantly, couldn’t concentrate as well, I never wanted to do anything, felt apathetic, and just kind of crappy all the time. Wasn’t severe but was definitely impacting my day to day life. I went back to seeing doctors. Lots of doctors said there was nothing medically wrong with me and some even said that the brain fog (and maybe even the throat issues) were all psychological. I didn’t feel like that was it because my symptoms felt so real and physical but what did I know. I was prescribed antidepressants and doctors recommended I see a therapist for bad anxiety issues. I spent the next couple of years trying multiple medications, seeing therapists, and making other changes but nothing helped. I thought I was going crazy. In those few years that passed, I had slowly started to feel worse. By the time I graduated high school, the constant mental fog and tiredness were affecting me pretty bad. I felt stressed and anxious nonstop. I had almost no life during high school because of it and did just the bare minimum to get by. With lots of doctors telling me there was nothing physically wrong with me, I started to believe them about it being all mental. I thought it was something I was doing wrong personally. At this point I wasn’t even talking to my family about it as much since supposedly there was nothing wrong and it was all in my head. Especially when doctor after doctor were saying nothing was wrong and because my symptoms were mostly feeling tired all the time, what was I supposed to say? It felt like it was my personal fault for feeling the way I did. Everyone gave me the impression that my issues were because of me and I just needed to change my mindset and lifestyle and I’d feel better. Do anxiety workbooks, deep breathing, get more sleep, take antidepressants, therapy. I did every single thing doctors and therapists told me to do, but nothing helped. Doctors and therapists made me question my sanity every day. It was hell.
I was in no shape to go to college out of state, but I did. I ended up going because supposedly there was nothing wrong with me and I was trying desperately to believe it was all in my head like doctors and therapists and my family were saying. I just needed to change my way of thinking and lifestyle and that would cure the constant brain fog and tiredness and throat issues. So I pushed myself to go, hoping I’d sort it out. I spent the next 4 years slowly feeling worse, still seeing doctors but getting no legit answers. I'd go months and months at a time without seeing a doctor as I didn't know where to turn and had given up at times. I saw a doctor about sleep apnea but didn't seem to fit almost any of the symptoms. Stuff like waking up trying to get air, choking, stopping breathing, snoring, wasn't overweight, wasn't unhealthy, didn’t have a family history of it or other health issues. Still, I tried one of those moldable mouthpieces that’s supposed to help with sleep apnea but didn't see any benefit from it. So with all of this, I figured it’s probably not sleep apnea. I was so desperate, I was constantly trying all sorts of medications, supplements, and other weird things to try and help myself. I felt like I was losing my damn mind. My mental health was horrendous. Felt like crap 24/7. I literally felt stupid because my brain wasn’t working. Dealing with symptoms and figuring out what was wrong with me consumed my entire life. I would occasionally go to class after taking a big dose of stimulant drugs, but even those only did so much. No amount of caffeine pills, energy drinks did anything either. I was beyond that stuff helping. I experienced almost nothing enjoyable in those 4 years of college and had basically no life, really no friends, hobbies, nothing. Really the only experience I had during college was when I went on a study abroad trip but it was hell because I felt so awful the whole time. I had also joined a fraternity in the beginning of college but did almost nothing with them for the same reason. The mental tiredness had gotten so bad it felt like I was disconnected and living in a dream. Like I felt kind of drunk. I was so mentally and emotionally numb and exhausted I didn’t even feel human. Like I physically could not feel emotions and felt super spaced out. I was also still dealing with the throat issues. I’d get random dizziness, my vision got worse (more sensitive to bright light, bad floaters in my eyes). I somehow managed to graduate college and finished feeling significantly worse than when I began. I was so miserable and had no one to talk to about what was going on. But I was at least glad that college was over, because it sucked horribly.
I spent the next year doing just the bare minimum to get by. About a year after college (2019), I had a sleep study done and results came back with moderate sleep apnea. For the first time I actually had an answer. Sleep doctor immediately prescribed a CPAP machine. Didn’t even bother to wonder why a young healthy person has sleep apnea to begin with, because it’s not normal. I spent the next 2ish years trying multiple machines, masks, changing all the settings, but only saw some improvement. Keeping the CPAP consistently on throughout the night was also a struggle in itself as it was super awkward and uncomfortable, even though I was desperately trying to make it work. When I was able to keep it on for 5+ hours a night I felt a bit better but it was really difficult to do so consistently. During this time I couldn’t really hold down a job, other than some really basic, short term jobs. And even those felt brutal. My relationships with everyone were affected pretty bad. I was a complete zombie because the tiredness was so overwhelming. It was as an amount of brain fog and exhaustion I didn’t know was humanly possible. I was making myself basically sick with stimulants that really weren't helping and even had a doctor at one point tell me that I should get genetic testing for depression or have my brain zapped with electric shocks. I luckily didn't go that route.
After two years of messing with machines, my sleep doctor then recommended I see a maxillofacial doctor to see what the underlying breathing issue was being caused by. The doctor recommended I get a custom mouthpiece made that shifts the lower jaw forward to help open the airway to prevent breathing issues while sleeping. The process of having it fitted and made took a couple months. I even took a “real” job during this same time because I had two different doctors telling me that this mouthpiece was likely to help me a lot. I felt like I couldn’t have gotten the mouthpiece fast enough. I ended up messing with the mouthpiece for months and had no benefit at all. Literally zero. The dentist who made the mouthpiece said that the mouthpiece wasn’t helping because I might just have “weak muscle tone” in my throat and that I should see someone called a myofunctional doctor to supposedly improve muscle tone in the throat and tongue. I looked into that and it seemed like total quack stuff so I didn’t do it and completely dropped that dentist that made my mouthpiece and suggested this. I then saw an ear nose and throat doctor and later did a sleep endoscopy with him where I was put to sleep and had my breathing monitored with a camera down my throat. The doctor said that my breathing issues were being caused by my throat and jaw and suggested that since the mouthpiece wasn’t helping, I could get surgery or have a device called Inspire surgically inserted into my chest and neck to artificially help breathing. I held off on that cause it sounded pretty extreme and thought there had to be something else. During this time I had to leave the job I should’ve never taken in the first place because I was so non-functional.
I pretty much gave up for months. I eventually scheduled an appointment with another ear nose & throat doctor (the same kind of doctor I saw when I was 13). I'd already seen many ear nose & throat doctors by this point but didn't know what else to do. Don’t remember how exactly it happened, but the connection was made that my issues were due to really abnormal nasal breathing. Something called nasal valve stenosis, where both sides of my nose were completely caving in and blocking most air, leading to crappy breathing, even when just breathing in lightly. This issue is worse during sleep and was causing my brain to “wake up” every time my nose had the obstruction. So I was struggling to breathe all night and I was slowly feeling worse as I was never getting good deep sleep. So the bad sleep every night just kept accumulating over the course of 10+ years. He also explained that my throat issues were a sign that my nose wasn’t functioning normally, which was causing airflow issues and a throat pressure feeling as a result. But weirdly the nasal issues weren’t being caused by my nose itself. There’s nothing actually wrong with my nose. It’s the middle part of the face that provides the base and support for the nose that is lacking the support needed to keep the nose open for normal breathing. Doctor said it’s really abnormal for nasal collapse to happen like this as a result of the face just not developing properly. It was just the way the middle of my face grew and changed over time, especially during puberty, that led to this. Doctor said it is called midface deficiency. It’s the area of the face just to the sides of the nose, below the eyes. Doctor said facial surgery is really what I needed but said nasal surgery could potentially help a bit and is less intense of a surgery, so I decided to go with that. Everything finally made sense for the first time ever. I even recorded my sleep and sure enough I could hear myself struggling to breathe all night.
Last year (2022), I had nasal valve surgery. It took a long time to recover from surgery and I still have to wear something in my nose when I sleep to prevent it from pinching shut because the surgery only helped a bit. I will still have to look into facial surgery to address the underlying issue as my breathing is still horrible during the day when I’m not wearing a dilator in my nose but at night I wear it and am good. Over time most of my issues have gone away. The slowly worsening exhaustion and brain fog and cognitive issues that started when I was a teenager. The constant severe anxiety and stress feelings I had since I was a kid. Throat issues gone. I no longer feel like killing myself out of misery. It was that obvious all along but untreated made my life constant fucking torture. Feeling horrible nonstop, slowly getting worse, not knowing why, being told there was nothing wrong with me and that it was all psychological, trying all sorts of things with no benefit, and having my entire life be ruined was a mental hell I wouldn’t wish on anyone. I don’t feel like my teens and most my 20s actually happened because I was in such poor health physically and mentally 24/7. I wish I had been able to see decent doctors earlier, but obviously that didn’t happen. I’m not even sure how I wasn’t able to make the connection myself. I think I was just so used to really bad breathing since I was young I didn’t know it was abnormal and had no reason to think I had some weird issue cause why would I? I still struggle with the mental effects of I think living like this for so long. These issues consumed everything for over 10 years so I guess it’s not surprising that it still affects me mentally even after the fact. Thanks for reading and hopefully this can help someone out there.
TLDR: Slowly worsening chronic fatigue/brain fog and other issues for 10+ years was due to really bad nasal breathing, mostly nasal valve collapse due to midface deficiency that developed when I was a teenager and was leading to sleep apnea
Here's photos of my nose just breathing in slightly deeper than normal:
https://imgur.com/aQWsJeX
https://imgur.com/a/7NsNIWo
2023.05.30 23:09 TemporaryShape3 FTB - tracker agreed (base+0.34%). Should we fix?
Appreciate nobody knows the answer, as we can’t see the future, but would be really useful to gain some opinions.
My partner and I currently have a Tracker agreed at 4.84% (0.34 over) as we were hopeful rates would come down, it has gone up twice since we agreed the mortgage (15% deposit). Now torn with what we should do as general consensus seems that rates will continue to rise.
Been offered 5 year tracker at 4.89% BUT lender has now withdrawn all of their trackers… am I reading into withdrawal of trackers too much? should we fix?
We are limited to one lender as I have just finished my masters, was therefore a student at time of application.
Small side benefit in the scheme of things, but we also get £500 cash back as part of the current product as we are purchasing a green home.
submitted by TemporaryShape3 to Mortgageadviceuk [link] [comments]
My partner and I currently have a Tracker agreed at 4.84% (0.34 over) as we were hopeful rates would come down, it has gone up twice since we agreed the mortgage (15% deposit). Now torn with what we should do as general consensus seems that rates will continue to rise.
Been offered 5 year tracker at 4.89% BUT lender has now withdrawn all of their trackers… am I reading into withdrawal of trackers too much? should we fix?
We are limited to one lender as I have just finished my masters, was therefore a student at time of application.
Small side benefit in the scheme of things, but we also get £500 cash back as part of the current product as we are purchasing a green home.
2023.05.30 23:08 Disastrous_Base_6040 I’m 15 Male, and I lost 36 pounds and can’t lose any more
In the past 6 months I lost about 36 pounds I used to weigh about 172 but I’ve reached a plateau or something like that I’m trying to lose the rest of my stomach fat but the scale won’t go down, I was hoping to find the answer on here.
submitted by Disastrous_Base_6040 to WeightLossAdvice [link] [comments]
2023.05.30 23:08 sanenormalgirl2000 A teenage boy just sparked a lighter next to my face when he walked past me
Some f*cking teenage boy thought it would be funny to spark a lighter up to my face when he and his friend walked past me. I immediately turned around and yelled 'what the f*ck is your problem' and he just shouted 'shut the f*ck up' with an angry troglodyte voice. I was in shock and on the verge of tears but I just walked away with my heart pounding. I literally had to take a different route back home (I was just walking to the supermarket when this happened) because I was so scared I would bump into them again. I've had a really horrible week dealing with facial dysmorphia and reliving all my past trauma so the fact that this just happened to me feels like a cruel joke. There is no way this boy would have done this to an attractive girl. He felt comfortable almost burning my face/hair because he saw me as an ugly, insecure woman, therefore disposable and worthless. It feels like the universe is trying to punish me at this point.
submitted by sanenormalgirl2000 to BodyDysmorphia [link] [comments]
2023.05.30 23:08 Lee_Bo The struggle is real.
 | FSL3 is giving me critically low warnings. Finger stick says I’m ok. It’s either way high or way low. In the several years I’ve been using FSL, I’ve only had a very few sensors read within 10-15% of finger stick. submitted by Lee_Bo to Freestylelibre [link] [comments] But I knew going into it that it probably wouldn’t be very accurate. |
2023.05.30 23:07 Dramatic-Surprise251 10+ years of debilitating chronic health issues solved!
I’m 27. When I was 13/14, I started having weird throat issues all the time. It felt like my throat had a lot of pressure in it, like a weird tension feeling, and the only thing that helped was when I ate/drank something or swallowed. This would help then it would come back a few minutes or so later. I had weird issues swallowing saliva too. I saw an ear nose & throat doctor about this and was told my issue was acid reflux. Doctor prescribed reflux medication and told me to sleep on an incline. I did those things for a while, but it didn’t help. Supposedly I was treating the issue and the doctor didn’t know why I wasn’t improving but told me to continue doing what I was doing to supposedly treat it. I saw some other doctors that weren’t sure either. I pretty much learned to just live like that but it was annoying and started to take over my life to the point that every day revolved around coping with my throat and dealing with the bad anxiety it was causing. I used to avoid things, had no life, had to make sure I always had something to drink to help my throat, and felt really stressed about the whole thing and how it was affecting me. On a side note, I also used to breathe mostly through my mouth as well. No one really knew, but I was really miserable all the time because of this stuff.
At 15, I started to feel like a brain fog on top of the throat issues. Something I’d never felt before. It was like my brain felt like mush all the time, no matter how much sleep I got. Like that feeling when you sleep really bad for a couple nights and feel like crap, except I was sleeping enough. Felt kind of spaced out constantly, couldn’t concentrate as well, I never wanted to do anything, felt apathetic, and just kind of crappy all the time. Wasn’t severe but was definitely impacting my day to day life. I went back to seeing doctors. Lots of doctors said there was nothing medically wrong with me and some even said that the brain fog (and maybe even the throat issues) were all psychological. I didn’t feel like that was it because my symptoms felt so real and physical but what did I know. I was prescribed antidepressants and doctors recommended I see a therapist for bad anxiety issues. I spent the next couple of years trying multiple medications, seeing therapists, and making other changes but nothing helped. I thought I was going crazy. In those few years that passed, I had slowly started to feel worse. By the time I graduated high school, the constant mental fog and tiredness were affecting me pretty bad. I felt stressed and anxious nonstop. I had almost no life during high school because of it and did just the bare minimum to get by. With lots of doctors telling me there was nothing physically wrong with me, I started to believe them about it being all mental. I thought it was something I was doing wrong personally. At this point I wasn’t even talking to my family about it as much since supposedly there was nothing wrong and it was all in my head. Especially when doctor after doctor were saying nothing was wrong and because my symptoms were mostly feeling tired all the time, what was I supposed to say? It felt like it was my personal fault for feeling the way I did. Everyone gave me the impression that my issues were because of me and I just needed to change my mindset and lifestyle and I’d feel better. Do anxiety workbooks, deep breathing, get more sleep, take antidepressants, therapy. I did every single thing doctors and therapists told me to do, but nothing helped. Doctors and therapists made me question my sanity every day. It was hell.
I was in no shape to go to college out of state, but I did. I ended up going because supposedly there was nothing wrong with me and I was trying desperately to believe it was all in my head like doctors and therapists and my family were saying. I just needed to change my way of thinking and lifestyle and that would cure the constant brain fog and tiredness and throat issues. So I pushed myself to go, hoping I’d sort it out. I spent the next 4 years slowly feeling worse, still seeing doctors but getting no legit answers. I'd go months and months at a time without seeing a doctor as I didn't know where to turn and had given up at times. I saw a doctor about sleep apnea but didn't seem to fit almost any of the symptoms. Stuff like waking up trying to get air, choking, stopping breathing, snoring, wasn't overweight, wasn't unhealthy, didn’t have a family history of it or other health issues. Still, I tried one of those moldable mouthpieces that’s supposed to help with sleep apnea but didn't see any benefit from it. So with all of this, I figured it’s probably not sleep apnea. I was so desperate, I was constantly trying all sorts of medications, supplements, and other weird things to try and help myself. I felt like I was losing my damn mind. My mental health was horrendous. Felt like crap 24/7. I literally felt stupid because my brain wasn’t working. Dealing with symptoms and figuring out what was wrong with me consumed my entire life. I would occasionally go to class after taking a big dose of stimulant drugs, but even those only did so much. No amount of caffeine pills, energy drinks did anything either. I was beyond that stuff helping. I experienced almost nothing enjoyable in those 4 years of college and had basically no life, really no friends, hobbies, nothing. Really the only experience I had during college was when I went on a study abroad trip but it was hell because I felt so awful the whole time. I had also joined a fraternity in the beginning of college but did almost nothing with them for the same reason. The mental tiredness had gotten so bad it felt like I was disconnected and living in a dream. Like I felt kind of drunk. I was so mentally and emotionally numb and exhausted I didn’t even feel human. Like I physically could not feel emotions and felt super spaced out. I was also still dealing with the throat issues. I’d get random dizziness, my vision got worse (more sensitive to bright light, bad floaters in my eyes). I somehow managed to graduate college and finished feeling significantly worse than when I began. I was so miserable and had no one to talk to about what was going on. But I was at least glad that college was over, because it sucked horribly.
I spent the next year doing just the bare minimum to get by. About a year after college (2019), I had a sleep study done and results came back with moderate sleep apnea. For the first time I actually had an answer. Sleep doctor immediately prescribed a CPAP machine. Didn’t even bother to wonder why a young healthy person has sleep apnea to begin with, because it’s not normal. I spent the next 2ish years trying multiple machines, masks, changing all the settings, but only saw some improvement. Keeping the CPAP consistently on throughout the night was also a struggle in itself as it was super awkward and uncomfortable, even though I was desperately trying to make it work. When I was able to keep it on for 5+ hours a night I felt a bit better but it was really difficult to do so consistently. During this time I couldn’t really hold down a job, other than some really basic, short term jobs. And even those felt brutal. My relationships with everyone were affected pretty bad. I was a complete zombie because the tiredness was so overwhelming. It was as an amount of brain fog and exhaustion I didn’t know was humanly possible. I was making myself basically sick with stimulants that really weren't helping and even had a doctor at one point tell me that I should get genetic testing for depression or have my brain zapped with electric shocks. I luckily didn't go that route.
After two years of messing with machines, my sleep doctor then recommended I see a maxillofacial doctor to see what the underlying breathing issue was being caused by. The doctor recommended I get a custom mouthpiece made that shifts the lower jaw forward to help open the airway to prevent breathing issues while sleeping. The process of having it fitted and made took a couple months. I even took a “real” job during this same time because I had two different doctors telling me that this mouthpiece was likely to help me a lot. I felt like I couldn’t have gotten the mouthpiece fast enough. I ended up messing with the mouthpiece for months and had no benefit at all. Literally zero. The dentist who made the mouthpiece said that the mouthpiece wasn’t helping because I might just have “weak muscle tone” in my throat and that I should see someone called a myofunctional doctor to supposedly improve muscle tone in the throat and tongue. I looked into that and it seemed like total quack stuff so I didn’t do it and completely dropped that dentist that made my mouthpiece and suggested this. I then saw an ear nose and throat doctor and later did a sleep endoscopy with him where I was put to sleep and had my breathing monitored with a camera down my throat. The doctor said that my breathing issues were being caused by my throat and jaw and suggested that since the mouthpiece wasn’t helping, I could get surgery or have a device called Inspire surgically inserted into my chest and neck to artificially help breathing. I held off on that cause it sounded pretty extreme and thought there had to be something else. During this time I had to leave the job I should’ve never taken in the first place because I was so non-functional.
I pretty much gave up for months. I eventually scheduled an appointment with another ear nose & throat doctor (the same kind of doctor I saw when I was 13). I'd already seen many ear nose & throat doctors by this point but didn't know what else to do. Don’t remember how exactly it happened, but the connection was made that my issues were due to really abnormal nasal breathing. Something called nasal valve stenosis, where both sides of my nose were completely caving in and blocking most air, leading to crappy breathing, even when just breathing in lightly. This issue is worse during sleep and was causing my brain to “wake up” every time my nose had the obstruction. So I was struggling to breathe all night and I was slowly feeling worse as I was never getting good deep sleep. So the bad sleep every night just kept accumulating over the course of 10+ years. He also explained that my throat issues were a sign that my nose wasn’t functioning normally, which was causing airflow issues and a throat pressure feeling as a result. But weirdly the nasal issues weren’t being caused by my nose itself. There’s nothing actually wrong with my nose. It’s the middle part of the face that provides the base and support for the nose that is lacking the support needed to keep the nose open for normal breathing. Doctor said it’s really abnormal for nasal collapse to happen like this as a result of the face just not developing properly. It was just the way the middle of my face grew and changed over time, especially during puberty, that led to this. Doctor said it is called midface deficiency. It’s the area of the face just to the sides of the nose, below the eyes. Doctor said facial surgery is really what I needed but said nasal surgery could potentially help a bit and is less intense of a surgery, so I decided to go with that. Everything finally made sense for the first time ever. I even recorded my sleep and sure enough I could hear myself struggling to breathe all night.
Last year (2022), I had nasal valve surgery. It took a long time to recover from surgery and I still have to wear something in my nose when I sleep to prevent it from pinching shut because the surgery only helped a bit. I will still have to look into facial surgery to address the underlying issue as my breathing is still horrible during the day when I’m not wearing a dilator in my nose but at night I wear it and am good. Over time most of my issues have gone away. The slowly worsening exhaustion and brain fog and cognitive issues that started when I was a teenager. The constant severe anxiety and stress feelings I had since I was a kid. Throat issues gone. I no longer feel like killing myself out of misery. It was that obvious all along but untreated made my life constant fucking torture. Feeling horrible nonstop, slowly getting worse, not knowing why, being told there was nothing wrong with me and that it was all psychological, trying all sorts of things with no benefit, and having my entire life be ruined was a mental hell I wouldn’t wish on anyone. I don’t feel like my teens and most my 20s actually happened because I was in such poor health physically and mentally 24/7. I wish I had been able to see decent doctors earlier, but obviously that didn’t happen. I’m not even sure how I wasn’t able to make the connection myself. I think I was just so used to really bad breathing since I was young I didn’t know it was abnormal and had no reason to think I had some weird issue cause why would I? I still struggle with the mental effects of I think living like this for so long. These issues consumed everything for over 10 years so I guess it’s not surprising that it still affects me mentally even after the fact. Thanks for reading and hopefully this can help someone out there.
TLDR: Slowly worsening chronic fatigue/brain fog and other issues for 10+ years was due to really bad nasal breathing, mostly nasal valve collapse due to midface deficiency that developed when I was a teenager and was leading to sleep apnea
Here's photos of my nose just breathing in slightly deeper than normal:
https://imgur.com/aQWsJeX
https://imgur.com/a/7NsNIWo
submitted by Dramatic-Surprise251 to medical_advice [link] [comments]
At 15, I started to feel like a brain fog on top of the throat issues. Something I’d never felt before. It was like my brain felt like mush all the time, no matter how much sleep I got. Like that feeling when you sleep really bad for a couple nights and feel like crap, except I was sleeping enough. Felt kind of spaced out constantly, couldn’t concentrate as well, I never wanted to do anything, felt apathetic, and just kind of crappy all the time. Wasn’t severe but was definitely impacting my day to day life. I went back to seeing doctors. Lots of doctors said there was nothing medically wrong with me and some even said that the brain fog (and maybe even the throat issues) were all psychological. I didn’t feel like that was it because my symptoms felt so real and physical but what did I know. I was prescribed antidepressants and doctors recommended I see a therapist for bad anxiety issues. I spent the next couple of years trying multiple medications, seeing therapists, and making other changes but nothing helped. I thought I was going crazy. In those few years that passed, I had slowly started to feel worse. By the time I graduated high school, the constant mental fog and tiredness were affecting me pretty bad. I felt stressed and anxious nonstop. I had almost no life during high school because of it and did just the bare minimum to get by. With lots of doctors telling me there was nothing physically wrong with me, I started to believe them about it being all mental. I thought it was something I was doing wrong personally. At this point I wasn’t even talking to my family about it as much since supposedly there was nothing wrong and it was all in my head. Especially when doctor after doctor were saying nothing was wrong and because my symptoms were mostly feeling tired all the time, what was I supposed to say? It felt like it was my personal fault for feeling the way I did. Everyone gave me the impression that my issues were because of me and I just needed to change my mindset and lifestyle and I’d feel better. Do anxiety workbooks, deep breathing, get more sleep, take antidepressants, therapy. I did every single thing doctors and therapists told me to do, but nothing helped. Doctors and therapists made me question my sanity every day. It was hell.
I was in no shape to go to college out of state, but I did. I ended up going because supposedly there was nothing wrong with me and I was trying desperately to believe it was all in my head like doctors and therapists and my family were saying. I just needed to change my way of thinking and lifestyle and that would cure the constant brain fog and tiredness and throat issues. So I pushed myself to go, hoping I’d sort it out. I spent the next 4 years slowly feeling worse, still seeing doctors but getting no legit answers. I'd go months and months at a time without seeing a doctor as I didn't know where to turn and had given up at times. I saw a doctor about sleep apnea but didn't seem to fit almost any of the symptoms. Stuff like waking up trying to get air, choking, stopping breathing, snoring, wasn't overweight, wasn't unhealthy, didn’t have a family history of it or other health issues. Still, I tried one of those moldable mouthpieces that’s supposed to help with sleep apnea but didn't see any benefit from it. So with all of this, I figured it’s probably not sleep apnea. I was so desperate, I was constantly trying all sorts of medications, supplements, and other weird things to try and help myself. I felt like I was losing my damn mind. My mental health was horrendous. Felt like crap 24/7. I literally felt stupid because my brain wasn’t working. Dealing with symptoms and figuring out what was wrong with me consumed my entire life. I would occasionally go to class after taking a big dose of stimulant drugs, but even those only did so much. No amount of caffeine pills, energy drinks did anything either. I was beyond that stuff helping. I experienced almost nothing enjoyable in those 4 years of college and had basically no life, really no friends, hobbies, nothing. Really the only experience I had during college was when I went on a study abroad trip but it was hell because I felt so awful the whole time. I had also joined a fraternity in the beginning of college but did almost nothing with them for the same reason. The mental tiredness had gotten so bad it felt like I was disconnected and living in a dream. Like I felt kind of drunk. I was so mentally and emotionally numb and exhausted I didn’t even feel human. Like I physically could not feel emotions and felt super spaced out. I was also still dealing with the throat issues. I’d get random dizziness, my vision got worse (more sensitive to bright light, bad floaters in my eyes). I somehow managed to graduate college and finished feeling significantly worse than when I began. I was so miserable and had no one to talk to about what was going on. But I was at least glad that college was over, because it sucked horribly.
I spent the next year doing just the bare minimum to get by. About a year after college (2019), I had a sleep study done and results came back with moderate sleep apnea. For the first time I actually had an answer. Sleep doctor immediately prescribed a CPAP machine. Didn’t even bother to wonder why a young healthy person has sleep apnea to begin with, because it’s not normal. I spent the next 2ish years trying multiple machines, masks, changing all the settings, but only saw some improvement. Keeping the CPAP consistently on throughout the night was also a struggle in itself as it was super awkward and uncomfortable, even though I was desperately trying to make it work. When I was able to keep it on for 5+ hours a night I felt a bit better but it was really difficult to do so consistently. During this time I couldn’t really hold down a job, other than some really basic, short term jobs. And even those felt brutal. My relationships with everyone were affected pretty bad. I was a complete zombie because the tiredness was so overwhelming. It was as an amount of brain fog and exhaustion I didn’t know was humanly possible. I was making myself basically sick with stimulants that really weren't helping and even had a doctor at one point tell me that I should get genetic testing for depression or have my brain zapped with electric shocks. I luckily didn't go that route.
After two years of messing with machines, my sleep doctor then recommended I see a maxillofacial doctor to see what the underlying breathing issue was being caused by. The doctor recommended I get a custom mouthpiece made that shifts the lower jaw forward to help open the airway to prevent breathing issues while sleeping. The process of having it fitted and made took a couple months. I even took a “real” job during this same time because I had two different doctors telling me that this mouthpiece was likely to help me a lot. I felt like I couldn’t have gotten the mouthpiece fast enough. I ended up messing with the mouthpiece for months and had no benefit at all. Literally zero. The dentist who made the mouthpiece said that the mouthpiece wasn’t helping because I might just have “weak muscle tone” in my throat and that I should see someone called a myofunctional doctor to supposedly improve muscle tone in the throat and tongue. I looked into that and it seemed like total quack stuff so I didn’t do it and completely dropped that dentist that made my mouthpiece and suggested this. I then saw an ear nose and throat doctor and later did a sleep endoscopy with him where I was put to sleep and had my breathing monitored with a camera down my throat. The doctor said that my breathing issues were being caused by my throat and jaw and suggested that since the mouthpiece wasn’t helping, I could get surgery or have a device called Inspire surgically inserted into my chest and neck to artificially help breathing. I held off on that cause it sounded pretty extreme and thought there had to be something else. During this time I had to leave the job I should’ve never taken in the first place because I was so non-functional.
I pretty much gave up for months. I eventually scheduled an appointment with another ear nose & throat doctor (the same kind of doctor I saw when I was 13). I'd already seen many ear nose & throat doctors by this point but didn't know what else to do. Don’t remember how exactly it happened, but the connection was made that my issues were due to really abnormal nasal breathing. Something called nasal valve stenosis, where both sides of my nose were completely caving in and blocking most air, leading to crappy breathing, even when just breathing in lightly. This issue is worse during sleep and was causing my brain to “wake up” every time my nose had the obstruction. So I was struggling to breathe all night and I was slowly feeling worse as I was never getting good deep sleep. So the bad sleep every night just kept accumulating over the course of 10+ years. He also explained that my throat issues were a sign that my nose wasn’t functioning normally, which was causing airflow issues and a throat pressure feeling as a result. But weirdly the nasal issues weren’t being caused by my nose itself. There’s nothing actually wrong with my nose. It’s the middle part of the face that provides the base and support for the nose that is lacking the support needed to keep the nose open for normal breathing. Doctor said it’s really abnormal for nasal collapse to happen like this as a result of the face just not developing properly. It was just the way the middle of my face grew and changed over time, especially during puberty, that led to this. Doctor said it is called midface deficiency. It’s the area of the face just to the sides of the nose, below the eyes. Doctor said facial surgery is really what I needed but said nasal surgery could potentially help a bit and is less intense of a surgery, so I decided to go with that. Everything finally made sense for the first time ever. I even recorded my sleep and sure enough I could hear myself struggling to breathe all night.
Last year (2022), I had nasal valve surgery. It took a long time to recover from surgery and I still have to wear something in my nose when I sleep to prevent it from pinching shut because the surgery only helped a bit. I will still have to look into facial surgery to address the underlying issue as my breathing is still horrible during the day when I’m not wearing a dilator in my nose but at night I wear it and am good. Over time most of my issues have gone away. The slowly worsening exhaustion and brain fog and cognitive issues that started when I was a teenager. The constant severe anxiety and stress feelings I had since I was a kid. Throat issues gone. I no longer feel like killing myself out of misery. It was that obvious all along but untreated made my life constant fucking torture. Feeling horrible nonstop, slowly getting worse, not knowing why, being told there was nothing wrong with me and that it was all psychological, trying all sorts of things with no benefit, and having my entire life be ruined was a mental hell I wouldn’t wish on anyone. I don’t feel like my teens and most my 20s actually happened because I was in such poor health physically and mentally 24/7. I wish I had been able to see decent doctors earlier, but obviously that didn’t happen. I’m not even sure how I wasn’t able to make the connection myself. I think I was just so used to really bad breathing since I was young I didn’t know it was abnormal and had no reason to think I had some weird issue cause why would I? I still struggle with the mental effects of I think living like this for so long. These issues consumed everything for over 10 years so I guess it’s not surprising that it still affects me mentally even after the fact. Thanks for reading and hopefully this can help someone out there.
TLDR: Slowly worsening chronic fatigue/brain fog and other issues for 10+ years was due to really bad nasal breathing, mostly nasal valve collapse due to midface deficiency that developed when I was a teenager and was leading to sleep apnea
Here's photos of my nose just breathing in slightly deeper than normal:
https://imgur.com/aQWsJeX
https://imgur.com/a/7NsNIWo
2023.05.30 23:06 RaeRaucciVIP Airstill Distilling
Just finished my second round of fermenting and distilling with my Airstill. This time I did 10 pounds of mangos, pitted and chopped up with the skin left on, mixed with 10 pounds of sugar. I got the sugar and fruit boiling in a big pot, and then ran the fruit chunks in a KitchenAid blender and dumped the fruit mash puree into a 5 gallon bucket, adding 2 tablespoons of a nice aggressive yeast. Fermentation started almost immediately and ran for 3 weeks straight.
When that finished, I strained the mixture out, and ran 1 L at a time through my Airstill. Wound up with 3 gallons of distillate, at 10% alcohol. I'm in the middle of running that through the AirStill again, now getting a 50% alcohol solution as the result.
Ran into a newbie mistake with my first batch. I put the spirit run as it came out into different bottles, not realizing that when I ran the mash through my Airstill, the run came out in different alcohol percentages over time, so each catchment bottle had a different alcohol level. Fixed that for this run by putting the run directly into a 3 gallon carboy, so it would all mix out and give a true overall alcohol reading.
submitted by RaeRaucciVIP to airstill [link] [comments]
When that finished, I strained the mixture out, and ran 1 L at a time through my Airstill. Wound up with 3 gallons of distillate, at 10% alcohol. I'm in the middle of running that through the AirStill again, now getting a 50% alcohol solution as the result.
Ran into a newbie mistake with my first batch. I put the spirit run as it came out into different bottles, not realizing that when I ran the mash through my Airstill, the run came out in different alcohol percentages over time, so each catchment bottle had a different alcohol level. Fixed that for this run by putting the run directly into a 3 gallon carboy, so it would all mix out and give a true overall alcohol reading.
2023.05.30 23:06 Embarrassed-Mail1417 What the hell is wrong with my mom
I don't know why but she's been acting really selfish lately and she acts as if all her kids 5 of us. Owe her something. When in matter of fact you adopted us, throughout the years she was getting money from the state and would claim us as dependents. As we were unable to be claimed she became less caring Almost like she doesn't see any value in us. Over the last 5 years we've stopped talking probably 15 20 times. We live in the same God damn house. I try so hard to make her feel like I'm doing something with my life and everytime I start school or college. She always makes my life hell. (Barely talking to me), getting mad easily over Almost nothing, this last time I tried to go to school my car got stolen. We gor into an argument she stopped talking to me, then the last month I had of school she takes her car keys away so I can't get to school and she stopped talking to me. That was 5 months ago. And now I had to go back to my miserable ass job that I told her I was gonna go back to school to try to escape working a 9-5 that doesn't pay anything. But she obviously doesn't care and or give a fuck about what I think I need. I'm convinced she loves to see me miserable because she'll be so happy when I come home absolutely destroyed from my job and isolate and sit in my room. Almost like she loves seeing me be fucking sad and depressed. She's 80 so I'm convinced she thinks working forever at a shitty job with shitty pay is worth it when it's not.
She kicked my sister out which she kinda deserved it. But proceeds to never talk to her.
My other sister they have had a good relationship until recently when she started calling her a bad mom and bitch or whatever else.
My older brother she kicked out and stopped talking from what I could understand was from drinking and drugs just like my other sister.
She has a set of 5 other kids. Most of them stopped talking to her up until maybe this year
One of them passed away and before he did he tried to get in contact with her and she didn't reply or didn't get it or something.
What the hell is happening? Am I crazy to think my mom is a narcissist
She once stopped talking to me because the state sent her one last check addressed to me at 19. It was my money. And she got mad and stopped talking to me over it.
She will go to parties like my younger brothers little kids party or baby shower. And make it about herself kinda pout and cry and wine like she's not getting the attention.
This last time we stopped talking was because she was doing 35 in a 50. Yes I could have drove it was after work I was tired. I tried to take her out to dinner her and her friend that lives with us and she made it about herself. I tried so hard to keep cool but couldn't. Wtf do I do. I haven't talked to her I either isolate or go outside and exercise or ride bikes but man. 6 or 7 months or this until I can possibly save up and or pull out a loan to rent my own place.
A part of me is going crazy and I just hate being in this house with the memories I have and just the problems she causes and proceeds to not say sorry for or take responsibility. I have horrible communication skills because of this lady. I have anxiety through the roof because of her. Depression, bi polar disorder.. I mean fuck I just want to leave and I think I'm gonna do that this year I'm 24 and I have to look out for myself.
But any feedback helps please 🙏🏿 I feel lost and I wake up everyday depressed.
submitted by Embarrassed-Mail1417 to Vent [link] [comments]
She kicked my sister out which she kinda deserved it. But proceeds to never talk to her.
My other sister they have had a good relationship until recently when she started calling her a bad mom and bitch or whatever else.
My older brother she kicked out and stopped talking from what I could understand was from drinking and drugs just like my other sister.
She has a set of 5 other kids. Most of them stopped talking to her up until maybe this year
One of them passed away and before he did he tried to get in contact with her and she didn't reply or didn't get it or something.
What the hell is happening? Am I crazy to think my mom is a narcissist
She once stopped talking to me because the state sent her one last check addressed to me at 19. It was my money. And she got mad and stopped talking to me over it.
She will go to parties like my younger brothers little kids party or baby shower. And make it about herself kinda pout and cry and wine like she's not getting the attention.
This last time we stopped talking was because she was doing 35 in a 50. Yes I could have drove it was after work I was tired. I tried to take her out to dinner her and her friend that lives with us and she made it about herself. I tried so hard to keep cool but couldn't. Wtf do I do. I haven't talked to her I either isolate or go outside and exercise or ride bikes but man. 6 or 7 months or this until I can possibly save up and or pull out a loan to rent my own place.
A part of me is going crazy and I just hate being in this house with the memories I have and just the problems she causes and proceeds to not say sorry for or take responsibility. I have horrible communication skills because of this lady. I have anxiety through the roof because of her. Depression, bi polar disorder.. I mean fuck I just want to leave and I think I'm gonna do that this year I'm 24 and I have to look out for myself.
But any feedback helps please 🙏🏿 I feel lost and I wake up everyday depressed.
2023.05.30 23:05 ARFID_study Seeking participants for study on Eating Behaviors (adults within the United States)
This study is open to adults (18 years +) within the United States.
Researchers are seeking both individuals without eating disorders or difficulties with eating, and individuals who feel they have symptoms of Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder(struggle to consume enough volume or variety of food due to sensory issues, low appetite, or fear or pain/vomiting/choking).
This study involves two parts. Part 1 is a 15 minute survey, and Part 2 is a 30 minute Zoom visit with a researcher on a day and time of your choosing. After completion of both Parts 1 and 2, participants are eligible for entry into a drawing for $50 Amazon gift cards.
Click Here to Learn More or to Participate
submitted by ARFID_study to SampleSize [link] [comments]
Researchers are seeking both individuals without eating disorders or difficulties with eating, and individuals who feel they have symptoms of Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder(struggle to consume enough volume or variety of food due to sensory issues, low appetite, or fear or pain/vomiting/choking).
This study involves two parts. Part 1 is a 15 minute survey, and Part 2 is a 30 minute Zoom visit with a researcher on a day and time of your choosing. After completion of both Parts 1 and 2, participants are eligible for entry into a drawing for $50 Amazon gift cards.
Click Here to Learn More or to Participate
2023.05.30 23:04 girl_from_the_crypt Stuck on earth and looking for a job: I sat in a shopping cart for most of this...
Nettie Peterson has known me at my best and at my worst, and after everything that's happened lately, I think I can finally say the same. I'm admittedly not very good at comforting her, though. I haven't had much practice, is all. Historically speaking, she's always been the one to take care of me. My introduction to earth was a confusing, horrifying time for me, and she had dealt with all of it. She'd handled every panic attack, brought me back from every low. When I woke up one night to a drilling pain in my stomach and blood soaking my panties, she managed to keep me calm while explaining that this would now happen every month.
What I'm saying is that the woman is insanely skilled.
Me, not so much. After we had gotten out of the cave, I tried to provide emotional support by petting her hair and talking soothingly. Seeing as I was also distressed, she was doing the same to me, so we were basically sitting on the beach holding each other. To the outside observer, we must have looked rather strange. I was relieved to finally get back to her house. We sat down in front of the TV and ate cupcakes. We have a special system for eating cupcakes. I peel off the frosting and give her rest. It's messy and I have to keep hand wipes nearby everytime, but it's how we do it. We both eat cupcakes whole when we're by ourselves, so it doesn't make much sense either, but when we share, it's always like this.
Once I was sure she was alright, I left her to go off to bed while I made my way back to the hotel, bracing myself for what I expected to be an extremely uncomfortable conversation.
The lobby was dim and quiet. The large, bright ceiling lights had been turned off with only a couple floor lamps illuminating the hall. I walked past the unmanned reception desk and up the stairs, then rapped my knuckles against the door to Frankie's room. After a couple seconds, he opened up. Upon meeting my gaze, he let out a soft gasp, but it wasn't followed by a smile this time. He made way for me to step inside, wordlessly, and I entered without breaking the silence. I sat down on the sofa where he joined me after placing a glass of coconut water in front of me.
For a beat, we both stared at the drink. I didn't take it.
"What you did felt really off earlier," I began. "You were trying to embarrass Nettie. If you were testing your boundaries, if you were trying to see how I'd react, you got your answer. Don't ever make me choose between you two. You'll lose."
"Yes," he said quietly.
"If you don't get along with Nettie, that's one thing. You don't need to. But she was needling you and you made a real effort to be cruel." I paused. "You act so strange sometimes. All bossy and cagey."
"Yes," he repeated, briefly falling silent as he worked away on his gum in slow, contemplative motions. "I'm sorry. I don't know why I did it. I wanted to unsettle her. It's not that I don't like her, she's fine, but at that moment, I simply loathed her. I couldn't tell you why. But I wish I'd kept quiet. I feel gross for spouting off like that."
"Then… why?"
"I don't know! There's this weird feeling, it comes over me and makes me remember stuff that's in the past… Then I get caught up and confused. I run my mouth, but I don't want to make you upset. I swear I won't do it again. I'll rein myself in."
"Will you? This doesn't seem right." I took a deep breath. "Frankie, I have no idea what you are. Even though you know everything about me."
"Not everything," he argued. "You never said a thing about what life was like where you're from. Or who you were before. Yes, that's not what this is about, but I'm just speaking technically."
"You shouldn't have to rely on technicalities to make a point."
"No. Look, I keep wondering what I'm even doing here. I like you a lot. But I haven't thought this through and by now, I'm scared to."
"Stop talking in riddles," I implored him.
He huffed out a chuckle. "I'd have to stop thinking in them first." Before he could add anything else, his phone started vibrating on the TV table. "Oh, dammit," he muttered. Shooting me an uncertain gaze, he reached out for it, his hand hovering above the screen. "Can I?"
"Sure." I let go of a long breath, snatched up the glass and leaned back in my seat as Frankie answered the call. I pick up on a woman's voice talking on the other end.
He kept glancing over at me almost sheepishly as he mumbled words of affirmation into the phone. "Yes… Yeah, I remember… Well, it's not a good time, but I'll do it. Bye." Dropping the device into his lap, he gave me a twist of the mouth. "That was Mae-Lynn. She works at—"
"The diner with you," I cut him off. "I do take note of the other staff there, for your information." I took a sip of my water. "Occasionally."
"I promised to do some shopping for her. She's come down with the flu. Store's closing soon, though, so I'll have to go now."
"Well, that's convenient."
"I was going to ask you to come along."
I agreed. Having lost track of the conversation, the drive was a grim, quiet affair. Frankie took us to one of the more expensive stores in the area, saying that he wanted to treat Mae-Lynn.
"Take a cart," I ordered, and once he had acquired one, I had him hold it still while I climbed inside. He regarded me with a bemused expression but refrained from commenting as he began to roll me down the aisles.
Grocery shopping at night is something else. Eighties music was playing over the radio at a low volume, but the otherwise quiet space made it sound decidedly louder. There was almost the hint of an echo. Safe for two of three singular, tired-looking individuals, Frankie and I were the only people in the store. I had nestled against the back of the cart, my head tipped back to watch Fran's face from below as his eyes roamed the shelves. Occasionally, he'd stop to check the list Mae-Lynn had texted him on his phone.
"If you want anything, speak up," he told me.
"I'm out of cereal," I said, just as we passed the respective aisle. He turned the cart back around, let me pick out a carton of cornflakes and took up walking again. After five minutes of stoically regarding him from my mobile vantage point, I piped up again. "Go back. Wrong ones."
"Well, which ones do you want? I'll get them, it's faster than pushing this thing around."
I shook my head. "No, no, I have to look at them. Go back."
He shook his head to himself but obediently maneuvered the cart back to the shelf with the breakfast items. I took my time picking out a different box, then settled back down.
"Happy?" Fran asked.
"Delighted."
After fifteen minutes, we were getting close to finishing Mae-Lynn's list. Frankie was starting to move towards the cash register, only for me to tug on his arm. "Turn back," I told him, holding up the box. "I don't want them after all. I need different ones."
He stifled a groan. "Sure, Sunshine." I let him roll me all the way back to the cereal aisle where I studied the colorful boxes intensely. "Nevermind," I said, turning back to him. "Let's go."
He started making his way over to the register again when I cleared my throat. "Actually, I think I might have another look."
"Are you kidding me?" he squeaked, only for me to hold his gaze with a smile. "You are," he choked out. "I oughta send you rolling right into that stack of cans."
"You wouldn't dare."
"Is that a challenge?" He glanced about himself, finding that we were alone. Then, he pushed the cart, and it swerved, sliding across the shiny floor. The thrill of the launch washed over me and I started laughing. He lunged for it, grabbing it just in time to prevent the collision.
"Do it again!" I demanded.
He indulged me, sending me swerving and spinning a couple more times. Eventually, he took a running start and pushed me down a long, empty aisle at a breakneck speed. The giggles died in my throat when, seemingly out of thin air, someone appeared at the end of the aisle. My jaw dropped and I reflexively gripped the sides of the cart to protect myself from the impending crash, but the person simply reached out and caught the cart by its edges. Within the blink of an eye, they had managed to steady it. My vehicle had come to a standstill. It all happened incredibly fast, and for a moment, I found myself unable to react. One of the other person's hands had come to rest over mine in the process. Still at a loss for words, I raised my head to meet their gaze.
Those eyes.
My heart, already thundering in my chest, dropped entirely into my stomach. There were pupils filling the void in that formerly uninterrupted pale vastness this time, but I recognized them either way. Seeing them sit in an actual face instead of behind a nondescript black mask was strange, but there was not a doubt in my mind. It was them.
The cultist had jarringly pleasant features that struck me as neither overtly feminine nor masculine. Their tawny skin had an almost bronze sheen to it and short locks of platinum blond hair stuck to their smooth forehead, slick with the same sweat that formed stains beneath the armpits of their light gray t-shirt.
It was like time stood still. The interaction could not have been longer than two seconds in total, but it felt like a full hour. From me staring at our linked hands, to locking eyes with them, to the cold, raw realization, it seemed to me as though forty minutes or more had gone by, followed by another twenty when I watched the crude smile forming on their lips. Their fingers clamped down on my own, and before I knew it, it had happened.
The lights in the store had changed color, taking on a dimmer, sickly green tint. The shelves around us had emptied and the gentle, melodic hum of the radio had been replaced by a deep, droning buzz of static. I was still sitting in the shopping cart, and the cultist was still leaning over me, but their expression had morphed into one of shocked disbelief. Seeing fear on the face of the person who'd stabbed me might have been a great satisfaction to me in any other situation, but right then and there, I was equally as terrified.
I had switched dimensions and was now alone with my attempted murderer.
The thought took a while to sink in, but the clearer it became, the more I felt the need to scream. And yet, not a sound left my lips. My own saliva had turned sour, filling my mouth with an acidic taste. Dread pooled in the pit of my stomach like icy, chilled water and tears were stringing the corners of my eyes. I blinked them away in a hurry, redirecting my gaze at the cultist. They were staring past me in a daze, taking in our changed surroundings before fixing me with a sharp glare.
"Seriously?"
"What?" The word somehow slipped past the lump in my throat.
The cultist made a sweeping gesture at our surroundings. "Where are we? What the hell is this? You don't even have your dimension hopping under control? Not gonna lie, I had higher expectations of you."
"What?" I repeated eloquently.
"You just switched dimensions on my ass. And seeing as you literally crashed into me, I don't think you planned on doing that."
"I didn't," I confirmed.
"That's what I'm talking about."
"You know about dimensions?"
The cultist palmed their face, emitting a deep, low groan. "Clearly."
I scrambled back in the cart, trying to bring some distance between the two of us. I bared my teeth at them, both rows elongating and curving outward. At least I was getting the hang of my physical transformation. "If you come any closer, I'll rip your hand off," I hissed, spittle flying out between my fangs.
"I believe you," they replied, narrowing their eyes at me. "I'm not gonna hurt you."
"That's hard for me to believe."
"Yes, sure. I did and I would again, but not here. Not now. You understand?" they asked pointedly, their voice cutting like a razor blade.
"I'm not sure I do."
"Well, without you, I won't get out of here, and I've stuff to do on the other side." They stepped behind the cart and grabbed onto the handle.
I hastily twisted around to face them. "You know about the finer details of dimension hopping but you can't do it yourself?"
They let out a soft sigh as they began pushing the cart, with me inside, down the empty aisle. "I managed to do it once. Just once. Never again. It's not a great surprise to me that you should be able to switch to the other sides, but I'd thought you'd be able to control it. I think I have your number. I'm pretty sure I know what you are, and we have more in common than you could have probably guessed. That boy you were with on the other hand… I won't lie, he freaks me out. He's got the strangest face and he didn't react to my eyes at all."
"What are you?" I queried, quick to steer him away from the topic of Frankie Preston even though I didn't really expect an honest answer. "How'd you do that the other night? Your… your eye thing?"
"That unsettled you, didn't it? It's not anything I do per se." They shrugged leisurely. "I could just as well ask you where you're hiding your tentacles."
"So you're not human. I didn't think you were," I stated. "What's your business with the Collective? What are you after? Are any of you normal people?"
"As far as I know, I'm the only one who's not." They steered the cart around the corner with a swift, forcible yank and I bumped painfully against the side of the cart. Stifling a yelp, I kept my face straight, looking over the shelves as we passed them. I noticed that some of them weren't entirely empty—there were a couple jars, cans and bags of various goods standing scattered throughout. They looked almost lonely. The cultist, registering my wandering gaze, stopped and grabbed a random plastic jar that looked like it could be containing peanut butter or something of the sort. The label was faded and partially peeled off. They inspected it from all sides before thrusting it into my hands. "Here, open it," they commanded.
"I certainly won't," I replied, a mix of rage and apprehension bubbling in my chest.
"Aren't you curious?"
"No. But if you are, go on and open it yourself."
They grunted, grabbing the jar and unscrewing the red lid. They dropped it to the floor where it bounced off once and rolled away into the darkness. Peering in, their expression remained unchanged. "Nothing. Look." They held it out to me and sure enough, it was empty. I let them hand it to me, intrigue winning me over as I started examining the small container. It was completely unremarkable. I reached two of my fingers inside only for the digits to suddenly be stricken with a searing pain. It flashed through my bones like lightning and I cried out, withdrawing my hand. Suddenly, the floor seemed to quiver. The lights in the store flickered, seeming startlingly bright for a split second only to turn dimly green once more. The cultist let out an involuntary shriek, staggering back before managing to steady themself as everything went back to its former solid state.
"What the fuck was that?" they wheezed.
"An earthquake?" I suggested, not quite knowing what else to say. My pulse was thrumming in my ears, hard enough to split my head in half. It took me a minute to regain a relative state of calm.
"An earthquake? In another dimension? You're messing with me."
"I don't know! Maybe it was… maybe I was nearly jumping back, I have no idea." I shook my head, ignoring the throbbing pain shooting through my temples. "I don't have it all figured out yet, but it's an emotional response. Whenever my flight instinct gets triggered, these dimension switches happen. It was the jar. The jar is painful inside."
"What do you mean?" they asked, eagerly reaching for the jar and sticking their pinky finger into it. They pulled it back out with a howl, letting the jar drop to the floor. "What the hell is up with this place?"
"How would I know?" I argued hotly.
"Yeah, well. Anyways." All of a sudden, their hand was in my hair, tugging on my braid. They yanked my head to the side, and before I could break out my tentacles or try to snap my jaws at them, I could feel their hot breath on my nape. A scream died in my throat, equal parts painful and shocked. My eyes burned, my vision swimming when the cultist dragged their teeth across my skin, leaving a trail of warm saliva. And then, fast and without mercy, they bit down.
The lights turned bright white. The static buzzing that had been hanging in the stale air changed to the familiar eighties music tunes. Squinting into the sudden brightness, the colors of the countless types of packaged products filling the shelves almost seemed to be screaming at me.
We were back.
The cultist disentangled themself, quickly stepping away from me. I looked up, still dazed, to see why. Frankie Preston had come up behind us, snatching the cart away from the other person and pulling it out of their reach. I immediately scrambled up to wrap my arms around him. "That's them," I breathed. "From the Collective."
"I know," he said tonelessly. His eyes, trained on the blonde, spelled murder. "You should get out of here," he added, addressing them. "The shelves here are rickety, they might fall on you."
The cultist's expression was a frozen mix of suppressed uncertainty and confusion. Still, they held the server's gaze. "You should maybe not… do anything stupid," they uttered, their voice almost equally as flat as his.
"I'm all about stupid."
"Then I guess I ought to leave. See you guys soon. It was a pleasure." They threw us a smile that was faker than Frankie's when he waited tables before marching off, leaving the two of us alone in the aisle.
"Are you alright?" Fran asked, running a hand over my mussed braid. "What happened? I'm so… one minute you were here and the next…"
"We switched dimensions."
"I pieced that together. You weren't gone for long… just a couple minutes." He nervously twisted his wet bubble gum around the tip of his finger, drawing nervous strings.
"Were you worried?"
"Out of my mind," he said in a low voice, not meeting my gaze. "I mean, I knew you'd be okay on your own, I wasn't saying that—"
"I wasn't. I'm not," I interrupted him. "I got out alright, sure I did, but I'm not okay right now." I swallowed. My throat was bone dry. "I need to call Mary Markov. She should hear about this."
Frankie nodded along. "Do you want me to do it for you? I'm certain I can give her an accurate description."
I declined and sat back in the cart. Per my request, Fran brought me home after we'd paid for everything. I needed some time alone to relax and pretend everything was normal. I cleaned my room and then looked through job listings, which I admittedly haven't done in a little while. When I couldn't find any other way to procrastinate, I made the call to Mary Markov, which went about as well as could be expected. She wants to see me tomorrow, though. I wish she'd told me about what. For a newsreader, she's really not very forward with her information.
X
1
2: deadbeat roommate
3: creepy crush
4: relocation
5: beach concert
6: First date
7: Temp work
8: roommate talk
9: a dismal worldview
10: warehouse
11: staircase
12: explanation
13: hurt
14: hospital
15: ocean
16: diner
17: government work
18: something in the caves
submitted by girl_from_the_crypt to nosleep [link] [comments]
What I'm saying is that the woman is insanely skilled.
Me, not so much. After we had gotten out of the cave, I tried to provide emotional support by petting her hair and talking soothingly. Seeing as I was also distressed, she was doing the same to me, so we were basically sitting on the beach holding each other. To the outside observer, we must have looked rather strange. I was relieved to finally get back to her house. We sat down in front of the TV and ate cupcakes. We have a special system for eating cupcakes. I peel off the frosting and give her rest. It's messy and I have to keep hand wipes nearby everytime, but it's how we do it. We both eat cupcakes whole when we're by ourselves, so it doesn't make much sense either, but when we share, it's always like this.
Once I was sure she was alright, I left her to go off to bed while I made my way back to the hotel, bracing myself for what I expected to be an extremely uncomfortable conversation.
The lobby was dim and quiet. The large, bright ceiling lights had been turned off with only a couple floor lamps illuminating the hall. I walked past the unmanned reception desk and up the stairs, then rapped my knuckles against the door to Frankie's room. After a couple seconds, he opened up. Upon meeting my gaze, he let out a soft gasp, but it wasn't followed by a smile this time. He made way for me to step inside, wordlessly, and I entered without breaking the silence. I sat down on the sofa where he joined me after placing a glass of coconut water in front of me.
For a beat, we both stared at the drink. I didn't take it.
"What you did felt really off earlier," I began. "You were trying to embarrass Nettie. If you were testing your boundaries, if you were trying to see how I'd react, you got your answer. Don't ever make me choose between you two. You'll lose."
"Yes," he said quietly.
"If you don't get along with Nettie, that's one thing. You don't need to. But she was needling you and you made a real effort to be cruel." I paused. "You act so strange sometimes. All bossy and cagey."
"Yes," he repeated, briefly falling silent as he worked away on his gum in slow, contemplative motions. "I'm sorry. I don't know why I did it. I wanted to unsettle her. It's not that I don't like her, she's fine, but at that moment, I simply loathed her. I couldn't tell you why. But I wish I'd kept quiet. I feel gross for spouting off like that."
"Then… why?"
"I don't know! There's this weird feeling, it comes over me and makes me remember stuff that's in the past… Then I get caught up and confused. I run my mouth, but I don't want to make you upset. I swear I won't do it again. I'll rein myself in."
"Will you? This doesn't seem right." I took a deep breath. "Frankie, I have no idea what you are. Even though you know everything about me."
"Not everything," he argued. "You never said a thing about what life was like where you're from. Or who you were before. Yes, that's not what this is about, but I'm just speaking technically."
"You shouldn't have to rely on technicalities to make a point."
"No. Look, I keep wondering what I'm even doing here. I like you a lot. But I haven't thought this through and by now, I'm scared to."
"Stop talking in riddles," I implored him.
He huffed out a chuckle. "I'd have to stop thinking in them first." Before he could add anything else, his phone started vibrating on the TV table. "Oh, dammit," he muttered. Shooting me an uncertain gaze, he reached out for it, his hand hovering above the screen. "Can I?"
"Sure." I let go of a long breath, snatched up the glass and leaned back in my seat as Frankie answered the call. I pick up on a woman's voice talking on the other end.
He kept glancing over at me almost sheepishly as he mumbled words of affirmation into the phone. "Yes… Yeah, I remember… Well, it's not a good time, but I'll do it. Bye." Dropping the device into his lap, he gave me a twist of the mouth. "That was Mae-Lynn. She works at—"
"The diner with you," I cut him off. "I do take note of the other staff there, for your information." I took a sip of my water. "Occasionally."
"I promised to do some shopping for her. She's come down with the flu. Store's closing soon, though, so I'll have to go now."
"Well, that's convenient."
"I was going to ask you to come along."
I agreed. Having lost track of the conversation, the drive was a grim, quiet affair. Frankie took us to one of the more expensive stores in the area, saying that he wanted to treat Mae-Lynn.
"Take a cart," I ordered, and once he had acquired one, I had him hold it still while I climbed inside. He regarded me with a bemused expression but refrained from commenting as he began to roll me down the aisles.
Grocery shopping at night is something else. Eighties music was playing over the radio at a low volume, but the otherwise quiet space made it sound decidedly louder. There was almost the hint of an echo. Safe for two of three singular, tired-looking individuals, Frankie and I were the only people in the store. I had nestled against the back of the cart, my head tipped back to watch Fran's face from below as his eyes roamed the shelves. Occasionally, he'd stop to check the list Mae-Lynn had texted him on his phone.
"If you want anything, speak up," he told me.
"I'm out of cereal," I said, just as we passed the respective aisle. He turned the cart back around, let me pick out a carton of cornflakes and took up walking again. After five minutes of stoically regarding him from my mobile vantage point, I piped up again. "Go back. Wrong ones."
"Well, which ones do you want? I'll get them, it's faster than pushing this thing around."
I shook my head. "No, no, I have to look at them. Go back."
He shook his head to himself but obediently maneuvered the cart back to the shelf with the breakfast items. I took my time picking out a different box, then settled back down.
"Happy?" Fran asked.
"Delighted."
After fifteen minutes, we were getting close to finishing Mae-Lynn's list. Frankie was starting to move towards the cash register, only for me to tug on his arm. "Turn back," I told him, holding up the box. "I don't want them after all. I need different ones."
He stifled a groan. "Sure, Sunshine." I let him roll me all the way back to the cereal aisle where I studied the colorful boxes intensely. "Nevermind," I said, turning back to him. "Let's go."
He started making his way over to the register again when I cleared my throat. "Actually, I think I might have another look."
"Are you kidding me?" he squeaked, only for me to hold his gaze with a smile. "You are," he choked out. "I oughta send you rolling right into that stack of cans."
"You wouldn't dare."
"Is that a challenge?" He glanced about himself, finding that we were alone. Then, he pushed the cart, and it swerved, sliding across the shiny floor. The thrill of the launch washed over me and I started laughing. He lunged for it, grabbing it just in time to prevent the collision.
"Do it again!" I demanded.
He indulged me, sending me swerving and spinning a couple more times. Eventually, he took a running start and pushed me down a long, empty aisle at a breakneck speed. The giggles died in my throat when, seemingly out of thin air, someone appeared at the end of the aisle. My jaw dropped and I reflexively gripped the sides of the cart to protect myself from the impending crash, but the person simply reached out and caught the cart by its edges. Within the blink of an eye, they had managed to steady it. My vehicle had come to a standstill. It all happened incredibly fast, and for a moment, I found myself unable to react. One of the other person's hands had come to rest over mine in the process. Still at a loss for words, I raised my head to meet their gaze.
Those eyes.
My heart, already thundering in my chest, dropped entirely into my stomach. There were pupils filling the void in that formerly uninterrupted pale vastness this time, but I recognized them either way. Seeing them sit in an actual face instead of behind a nondescript black mask was strange, but there was not a doubt in my mind. It was them.
The cultist had jarringly pleasant features that struck me as neither overtly feminine nor masculine. Their tawny skin had an almost bronze sheen to it and short locks of platinum blond hair stuck to their smooth forehead, slick with the same sweat that formed stains beneath the armpits of their light gray t-shirt.
It was like time stood still. The interaction could not have been longer than two seconds in total, but it felt like a full hour. From me staring at our linked hands, to locking eyes with them, to the cold, raw realization, it seemed to me as though forty minutes or more had gone by, followed by another twenty when I watched the crude smile forming on their lips. Their fingers clamped down on my own, and before I knew it, it had happened.
The lights in the store had changed color, taking on a dimmer, sickly green tint. The shelves around us had emptied and the gentle, melodic hum of the radio had been replaced by a deep, droning buzz of static. I was still sitting in the shopping cart, and the cultist was still leaning over me, but their expression had morphed into one of shocked disbelief. Seeing fear on the face of the person who'd stabbed me might have been a great satisfaction to me in any other situation, but right then and there, I was equally as terrified.
I had switched dimensions and was now alone with my attempted murderer.
The thought took a while to sink in, but the clearer it became, the more I felt the need to scream. And yet, not a sound left my lips. My own saliva had turned sour, filling my mouth with an acidic taste. Dread pooled in the pit of my stomach like icy, chilled water and tears were stringing the corners of my eyes. I blinked them away in a hurry, redirecting my gaze at the cultist. They were staring past me in a daze, taking in our changed surroundings before fixing me with a sharp glare.
"Seriously?"
"What?" The word somehow slipped past the lump in my throat.
The cultist made a sweeping gesture at our surroundings. "Where are we? What the hell is this? You don't even have your dimension hopping under control? Not gonna lie, I had higher expectations of you."
"What?" I repeated eloquently.
"You just switched dimensions on my ass. And seeing as you literally crashed into me, I don't think you planned on doing that."
"I didn't," I confirmed.
"That's what I'm talking about."
"You know about dimensions?"
The cultist palmed their face, emitting a deep, low groan. "Clearly."
I scrambled back in the cart, trying to bring some distance between the two of us. I bared my teeth at them, both rows elongating and curving outward. At least I was getting the hang of my physical transformation. "If you come any closer, I'll rip your hand off," I hissed, spittle flying out between my fangs.
"I believe you," they replied, narrowing their eyes at me. "I'm not gonna hurt you."
"That's hard for me to believe."
"Yes, sure. I did and I would again, but not here. Not now. You understand?" they asked pointedly, their voice cutting like a razor blade.
"I'm not sure I do."
"Well, without you, I won't get out of here, and I've stuff to do on the other side." They stepped behind the cart and grabbed onto the handle.
I hastily twisted around to face them. "You know about the finer details of dimension hopping but you can't do it yourself?"
They let out a soft sigh as they began pushing the cart, with me inside, down the empty aisle. "I managed to do it once. Just once. Never again. It's not a great surprise to me that you should be able to switch to the other sides, but I'd thought you'd be able to control it. I think I have your number. I'm pretty sure I know what you are, and we have more in common than you could have probably guessed. That boy you were with on the other hand… I won't lie, he freaks me out. He's got the strangest face and he didn't react to my eyes at all."
"What are you?" I queried, quick to steer him away from the topic of Frankie Preston even though I didn't really expect an honest answer. "How'd you do that the other night? Your… your eye thing?"
"That unsettled you, didn't it? It's not anything I do per se." They shrugged leisurely. "I could just as well ask you where you're hiding your tentacles."
"So you're not human. I didn't think you were," I stated. "What's your business with the Collective? What are you after? Are any of you normal people?"
"As far as I know, I'm the only one who's not." They steered the cart around the corner with a swift, forcible yank and I bumped painfully against the side of the cart. Stifling a yelp, I kept my face straight, looking over the shelves as we passed them. I noticed that some of them weren't entirely empty—there were a couple jars, cans and bags of various goods standing scattered throughout. They looked almost lonely. The cultist, registering my wandering gaze, stopped and grabbed a random plastic jar that looked like it could be containing peanut butter or something of the sort. The label was faded and partially peeled off. They inspected it from all sides before thrusting it into my hands. "Here, open it," they commanded.
"I certainly won't," I replied, a mix of rage and apprehension bubbling in my chest.
"Aren't you curious?"
"No. But if you are, go on and open it yourself."
They grunted, grabbing the jar and unscrewing the red lid. They dropped it to the floor where it bounced off once and rolled away into the darkness. Peering in, their expression remained unchanged. "Nothing. Look." They held it out to me and sure enough, it was empty. I let them hand it to me, intrigue winning me over as I started examining the small container. It was completely unremarkable. I reached two of my fingers inside only for the digits to suddenly be stricken with a searing pain. It flashed through my bones like lightning and I cried out, withdrawing my hand. Suddenly, the floor seemed to quiver. The lights in the store flickered, seeming startlingly bright for a split second only to turn dimly green once more. The cultist let out an involuntary shriek, staggering back before managing to steady themself as everything went back to its former solid state.
"What the fuck was that?" they wheezed.
"An earthquake?" I suggested, not quite knowing what else to say. My pulse was thrumming in my ears, hard enough to split my head in half. It took me a minute to regain a relative state of calm.
"An earthquake? In another dimension? You're messing with me."
"I don't know! Maybe it was… maybe I was nearly jumping back, I have no idea." I shook my head, ignoring the throbbing pain shooting through my temples. "I don't have it all figured out yet, but it's an emotional response. Whenever my flight instinct gets triggered, these dimension switches happen. It was the jar. The jar is painful inside."
"What do you mean?" they asked, eagerly reaching for the jar and sticking their pinky finger into it. They pulled it back out with a howl, letting the jar drop to the floor. "What the hell is up with this place?"
"How would I know?" I argued hotly.
"Yeah, well. Anyways." All of a sudden, their hand was in my hair, tugging on my braid. They yanked my head to the side, and before I could break out my tentacles or try to snap my jaws at them, I could feel their hot breath on my nape. A scream died in my throat, equal parts painful and shocked. My eyes burned, my vision swimming when the cultist dragged their teeth across my skin, leaving a trail of warm saliva. And then, fast and without mercy, they bit down.
The lights turned bright white. The static buzzing that had been hanging in the stale air changed to the familiar eighties music tunes. Squinting into the sudden brightness, the colors of the countless types of packaged products filling the shelves almost seemed to be screaming at me.
We were back.
The cultist disentangled themself, quickly stepping away from me. I looked up, still dazed, to see why. Frankie Preston had come up behind us, snatching the cart away from the other person and pulling it out of their reach. I immediately scrambled up to wrap my arms around him. "That's them," I breathed. "From the Collective."
"I know," he said tonelessly. His eyes, trained on the blonde, spelled murder. "You should get out of here," he added, addressing them. "The shelves here are rickety, they might fall on you."
The cultist's expression was a frozen mix of suppressed uncertainty and confusion. Still, they held the server's gaze. "You should maybe not… do anything stupid," they uttered, their voice almost equally as flat as his.
"I'm all about stupid."
"Then I guess I ought to leave. See you guys soon. It was a pleasure." They threw us a smile that was faker than Frankie's when he waited tables before marching off, leaving the two of us alone in the aisle.
"Are you alright?" Fran asked, running a hand over my mussed braid. "What happened? I'm so… one minute you were here and the next…"
"We switched dimensions."
"I pieced that together. You weren't gone for long… just a couple minutes." He nervously twisted his wet bubble gum around the tip of his finger, drawing nervous strings.
"Were you worried?"
"Out of my mind," he said in a low voice, not meeting my gaze. "I mean, I knew you'd be okay on your own, I wasn't saying that—"
"I wasn't. I'm not," I interrupted him. "I got out alright, sure I did, but I'm not okay right now." I swallowed. My throat was bone dry. "I need to call Mary Markov. She should hear about this."
Frankie nodded along. "Do you want me to do it for you? I'm certain I can give her an accurate description."
I declined and sat back in the cart. Per my request, Fran brought me home after we'd paid for everything. I needed some time alone to relax and pretend everything was normal. I cleaned my room and then looked through job listings, which I admittedly haven't done in a little while. When I couldn't find any other way to procrastinate, I made the call to Mary Markov, which went about as well as could be expected. She wants to see me tomorrow, though. I wish she'd told me about what. For a newsreader, she's really not very forward with her information.
X
1
2: deadbeat roommate
3: creepy crush
4: relocation
5: beach concert
6: First date
7: Temp work
8: roommate talk
9: a dismal worldview
10: warehouse
11: staircase
12: explanation
13: hurt
14: hospital
15: ocean
16: diner
17: government work
18: something in the caves
2023.05.30 23:04 sweet_kristy357 F4M Romance mixed with action and mystery roleplay
Hello gorgeous people. I am currently on the lookout for a captivating and pulse-pounding roleplay that seamlessly combines action, romance, mystery, and a sprinkle of comedy. If you're a skilled writer who can bring thrilling narratives to life in the 3rd person past tense, and you can deliver substantial responses with impeccable grammar, then you might just be the partner I've been searching for.
As a writer, I thrive on crafting vivid descriptions that transport us to the heart of the action. From heart-stopping chase scenes through to spine-tingling encounters in dark and mysterious settings, I want to immerse myself in a world that feels alive and tangible. I value collaborative storytelling, where we can shape the story together, play supporting characters, and delve into the depths of our plot.
I am mainly seeking descriptive partners who can eloquently write more than a paragraph per response, but with no doubt I value quality over quantity. There are couple of plots I have planned out and would love to share it with you, and if it doesn't pique your interest, we can build our own unique story from scratch.
It is important to note that I am 20 years old, and all participants should be 20+
Excited to hear from you all soon :)
submitted by sweet_kristy357 to Roleplay [link] [comments]
As a writer, I thrive on crafting vivid descriptions that transport us to the heart of the action. From heart-stopping chase scenes through to spine-tingling encounters in dark and mysterious settings, I want to immerse myself in a world that feels alive and tangible. I value collaborative storytelling, where we can shape the story together, play supporting characters, and delve into the depths of our plot.
I am mainly seeking descriptive partners who can eloquently write more than a paragraph per response, but with no doubt I value quality over quantity. There are couple of plots I have planned out and would love to share it with you, and if it doesn't pique your interest, we can build our own unique story from scratch.
It is important to note that I am 20 years old, and all participants should be 20+
Excited to hear from you all soon :)
2023.05.30 23:03 LTRedditGuy The Drugs I Took Nearly Got Me Killed
About a week ago I had a pounding migraine that wouldn’t go away, I tried everything; medicines, antihistamines and mostly everything else. I went to the doctors a couple times, but they couldn’t do jack, I literally thought nothing would make this go away and I’ll just have to sleep it off.
Until I found something online,
“24/7 Cheap Doctors Appointment Just for You!”. I was skeptical at first, I mean who would fall for something like that; but by this point I was looking for anything I had. So, I went. I took the address and sped off, no thoughts in my mind apart from the pounding sensation running through my head. I did eventually get there; it took a while, but I could handle the pain as I went upstairs.
When I got there it wasn’t what I expected; old dusty carpet on the floor, the walls poking out at me with jagged sides, cabinets from the 90’s and…two doctors already standing there, like they knew I was coming.
“Hello Richard! Just have a seat next to Dr Hartman.” The other doctor loudly suggests, wait, how does she know my name? I just sit down to wait and then the split second I sit down, Dr Hartman shoves something down my throat. It was short, but noticeable.
“Alright have a good day, Richard!” Have a good day? I had so many questions in my mind, but I didn’t want to say anything, so I just left, but when I walked out, I got a text from my friend. He was talking about a concert to go to, he had already paid for it. I somewhat agreed with hesitation, what if something happened with the things shoved down my throat? I didn’t think properly at the time.
The car ride was terrible, nothing but agonizing pain; it got worse when I got to the concert. When I got to the concert, I’m going to take it the medicine shoved down my throat kicked in because everyone became nothing but rainbow. Like a drug overdose, it was pure torture. When I got into the actual concert it was only spirals cheering for the people on stage, I didn’t even know if I was with my friend. Until someone grabs my right wrist, tightly. I start rapidly jogging with some dude that by my knowledge was my friend, we walk for at least five minutes till we stop, the cheering also stops. Where am I? The only sound I hear is water dripping onto the damp floor.
I wish I could tell you a happy ending, but I can’t. I don’t know where I am; the only light I see is one spiral, a very small spiral getting bigger. I’ll notify all of you when I get back home, but I don’t now know what’s home.
submitted by LTRedditGuy to shortscarystories [link] [comments]
Until I found something online,
“24/7 Cheap Doctors Appointment Just for You!”. I was skeptical at first, I mean who would fall for something like that; but by this point I was looking for anything I had. So, I went. I took the address and sped off, no thoughts in my mind apart from the pounding sensation running through my head. I did eventually get there; it took a while, but I could handle the pain as I went upstairs.
When I got there it wasn’t what I expected; old dusty carpet on the floor, the walls poking out at me with jagged sides, cabinets from the 90’s and…two doctors already standing there, like they knew I was coming.
“Hello Richard! Just have a seat next to Dr Hartman.” The other doctor loudly suggests, wait, how does she know my name? I just sit down to wait and then the split second I sit down, Dr Hartman shoves something down my throat. It was short, but noticeable.
“Alright have a good day, Richard!” Have a good day? I had so many questions in my mind, but I didn’t want to say anything, so I just left, but when I walked out, I got a text from my friend. He was talking about a concert to go to, he had already paid for it. I somewhat agreed with hesitation, what if something happened with the things shoved down my throat? I didn’t think properly at the time.
The car ride was terrible, nothing but agonizing pain; it got worse when I got to the concert. When I got to the concert, I’m going to take it the medicine shoved down my throat kicked in because everyone became nothing but rainbow. Like a drug overdose, it was pure torture. When I got into the actual concert it was only spirals cheering for the people on stage, I didn’t even know if I was with my friend. Until someone grabs my right wrist, tightly. I start rapidly jogging with some dude that by my knowledge was my friend, we walk for at least five minutes till we stop, the cheering also stops. Where am I? The only sound I hear is water dripping onto the damp floor.
I wish I could tell you a happy ending, but I can’t. I don’t know where I am; the only light I see is one spiral, a very small spiral getting bigger. I’ll notify all of you when I get back home, but I don’t now know what’s home.
2023.05.30 22:57 ignaciohazard Cold crashing set up advice
I live in the SW and have a south facing garage where my brewing equipment is kept. During the fall/wintespring I have no trouble crashing into the 30 but this time of year it's difficult just to maintain in the 50s. The heat in the garage overcomes my set up and by mid day it can't keep up and I have to raise the FV temp so the cooling reservoir can cool down again. I'll explain my set up below.
I have a spike conical with the cooling coil. Next to my FV is a chest freezer with a bucket in it that has about 3.5/4 gallons of antifreeze in it. I use the pump and lines from the spike cooling kit. I use two inkbird controllers. One controls the temp of the antifreeze, usually set to around 15 F. The other controls my FV temp activating the pump to circulate the anti freeze through the cooling coil. The lines from the antifreeze to the coiling cool are insulated and go through the lid of the chest freezer so that the freezer lid is always closed. The return line empties into the top of the antifreeze bucket and the pump is at the bottom so that the warm antifreeze ends up on top and the pump is drawing the coldest antifreeze from the bottom.
Things I am considering. 1. Insulat garage door 2. More antifreeze or switch to glycol 3. A lid on the bucket in the freezer
Any ideas or feedback would be appreciated.
submitted by ignaciohazard to Homebrewing [link] [comments]
I have a spike conical with the cooling coil. Next to my FV is a chest freezer with a bucket in it that has about 3.5/4 gallons of antifreeze in it. I use the pump and lines from the spike cooling kit. I use two inkbird controllers. One controls the temp of the antifreeze, usually set to around 15 F. The other controls my FV temp activating the pump to circulate the anti freeze through the cooling coil. The lines from the antifreeze to the coiling cool are insulated and go through the lid of the chest freezer so that the freezer lid is always closed. The return line empties into the top of the antifreeze bucket and the pump is at the bottom so that the warm antifreeze ends up on top and the pump is drawing the coldest antifreeze from the bottom.
Things I am considering. 1. Insulat garage door 2. More antifreeze or switch to glycol 3. A lid on the bucket in the freezer
Any ideas or feedback would be appreciated.
2023.05.30 22:57 ginomachi Saw this and thought a bitcoiner was lost to the FUD
 | submitted by ginomachi to cryptoloversclub [link] [comments] |