00:00:00.052 I Configuration LogValueChange: ResScale set to: 1
00:00:00.057 I Configuration LogValueChange: ResScaleCustom set to: 1
00:00:00.058 I Configuration LogValueChange: MaxAnisotropy set to: -1
00:00:00.059 I Configuration LogValueChange: AspectRatio set to: Fixed16x9
00:00:00.060 I Configuration LogValueChange: BackendThreading set to: Auto
00:00:00.060 I Configuration LogValueChange: GraphicsBackend set to: OpenGl
00:00:00.061 I Configuration LogValueChange: PreferredGpu set to:
00:00:00.062 I Configuration LogValueChange: AntiAliasing set to: None
00:00:00.062 I Configuration LogValueChange: ScalingFilter set to: Bilinear
00:00:00.062 I Configuration LogValueChange: ScalingFilterLevel set to: 80
00:00:00.065 I Configuration LogValueChange: EnableDockedMode set to: True
00:00:00.076 I Configuration LogValueChange: EnableVsync set to: True
00:00:00.076 I Configuration LogValueChange: EnableShaderCache set to: True
00:00:00.076 I Configuration LogValueChange: EnableTextureRecompression set to: False
00:00:00.076 I Configuration LogValueChange: EnableMacroHLE set to: True
00:00:00.076 I Configuration LogValueChange: EnablePtc set to: True
00:00:00.077 I Configuration LogValueChange: EnableInternetAccess set to: False
00:00:00.077 I Configuration LogValueChange: EnableFsIntegrityChecks set to: True
00:00:00.077 I Configuration LogValueChange: FsGlobalAccessLogMode set to: 0
00:00:00.077 I Configuration LogValueChange: AudioBackend set to: SDL2
00:00:00.078 I Configuration LogValueChange: AudioVolume set to: 1
00:00:00.078 I Configuration LogValueChange: MemoryManagerMode set to: HostMappedUnsafe
00:00:00.078 I Configuration LogValueChange: ExpandRam set to: False
00:00:00.079 I Configuration LogValueChange: IgnoreMissingServices set to: False
00:00:00.079 I Configuration LogValueChange: UseHypervisor set to: True
00:00:00.084 N Application PrintSystemInfo: Ryujinx Version: 1.0.0-dirty
00:00:00.090 N Application Print: Operating System: Microsoft Windows 10.0.19045 (X64)
00:00:00.090 N Application Print: CPU: AMD Ryzen 5 2600 Six-Core Processor ; 12 logical
00:00:00.091 N Application Print: RAM: Total 16332 MiB ; Available 9754 MiB
00:00:00.095 N Application PrintSystemInfo: Logs Enabled: Info, Warning, Error, Guest, Stub
00:00:00.095 N Application PrintSystemInfo: Launch Mode: UserProfile
00:00:00.098 I Gpu : Backend Threading (Auto): True
00:00:00.830 N Application LoadApplication: Using Firmware Version: 15.0.1
00:00:00.831 I Application LoadApplication: Loading as XCI.
00:00:00.957 I ModLoader QueryContentsDir: Searching mods for Title 0100F2C0115B6000
00:00:00.960 I ModLoader QueryTitleDir: Found mod '30fps' [E]
00:00:00.961 I ModLoader QueryTitleDir: Found mod 'TOTKYuzuFix' [E]
00:00:00.962 I ModLoader QueryContentsDir: Searching mods for Title 0100F2C0115B6000
00:00:00.972 I Loader Load: Loading rtld...
00:00:00.983 I Loader PrintRoSectionInfo: rtld:
Module: nnrtld
00:00:00.984 I Loader Load: Loading main...
00:00:03.059 I Loader PrintRoSectionInfo: main:
Module: D:\home\Project\EX-King\App\Rom\NX64\Product_Optimize\code\EX-King.nss
SDK Libraries: SDK MW+Nintendo+NintendoWare_Vfx2-15_3_1-Release
SDK MW+Nintendo+NintendoWare_Font-15_3_1-Release
SDK MW+Nintendo+NintendoWare_Ui2d-15_3_1-Release
SDK MW+Nintendo+NintendoWare_G3d2-15_3_1-Release
SDK MW+Nintendo+NintendoWare_Meshoptimizer_For_MeshCodec-0_15_0-Release
SDK MW+Microsoft+Havok_Cloth-2022_1
SDK MW+Microsoft+Havok_Animation-2022_1
SDK MW+Microsoft+Havok_AI-2022_1
00:00:03.060 I Loader Load: Loading subsdk0...
00:00:03.249 I Loader PrintRoSectionInfo: subsdk0:
Module: multimedia
SDK Libraries: SDK MW+Nintendo+NintendoSDK_movie-15_3_1-Release
00:00:03.249 I Loader Load: Loading sdk...
00:00:03.612 I Loader PrintRoSectionInfo: sdk:
Module: nnSdk
FS SDK Version: 15.3.1
SDK Libraries: SDK MW+Nintendo+NintendoSDK_libz-15_3_1-Release
SDK MW+Nintendo+NintendoSdk_nnSdk-15_3_1-Release
SDK MW+Nintendo+NintendoSdk_BuildTarget-64Bit
SDK MW+Nintendo+NintendoSDK_NVN-15_3_1-Release
00:00:03.630 I ModLoader ApplyProgramPatches: Matching IPSwitch patch '1.0.0.pchtxt' in '30fps' bid=082CE09B06E33A123CB1E2770F5F9147709033DB
00:00:03.633 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0x8f6dac <= 41008052
00:00:03.634 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0xe9d9a0 <= 41008052
00:00:03.634 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0x8f6d78 <= 55008052
00:00:03.634 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0x8f6e20 <= 55008052
00:00:03.635 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0x1965a1c <= 1F2003D5
00:00:03.635 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0x19708ac <= 1F2003D5
00:00:03.637 E ModLoader .ctor: IPSwitch: Malformed PCHTXT file. Skipping...
00:00:03.638 I ModLoader ApplyProgramPatches: Matching IPSwitch patch 'main.pchtxt' in 'TOTKYuzuFix' bid=082CE09B06E33A123CB1E2770F5F9147709033DB
00:00:03.638 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0xe301b0 <= E00313AA
00:00:03.639 I ModLoader ApplyProgramPatches: Matching IPSwitch patch 'sdk.pchtxt' in 'TOTKYuzuFix' bid=B9046C31EB5D31271BE970FE732D38DF49C6AA21
00:00:03.639 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0x163c5c <= 46000014
00:00:03.639 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0x163db0 <= 46000014
00:00:03.639 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0x1640e8 <= 46000014
00:00:03.639 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0x163b10 <= 45000014
00:00:03.639 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0x163998 <= 44000014
00:00:03.639 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0x163f68 <= 46000014
00:00:03.639 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0x16426c <= 46000014
00:00:03.639 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0xdb6f4 <= F30300B9
00:00:03.639 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0x3d31fc <= 09038052
00:00:03.639 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0x3d3204 <= 4B0D40B8
00:00:03.639 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0x3d3210 <= 8db940a9
00:00:03.639 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0x3d3264 <= 05000014
00:00:03.639 I ModLoader Parse: IPSwitch: print_values 0x3d32c0 <= e9030baa
00:00:03.646 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset 8f6c78 <= 55 00 80 52 len=4
00:00:03.647 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset 8f6cac <= 41 00 80 52 len=4
00:00:03.647 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset 8f6d20 <= 55 00 80 52 len=4
00:00:03.647 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset e300b0 <= E0 03 13 AA len=4
00:00:03.647 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset e9d8a0 <= 41 00 80 52 len=4
00:00:03.647 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset 196591c <= 1F 20 03 D5 len=4
00:00:03.647 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset 19707ac <= 1F 20 03 D5 len=4
00:00:03.647 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset db5f4 <= F3 03 00 B9 len=4
00:00:03.647 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset 163898 <= 44 00 00 14 len=4
00:00:03.647 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset 163a10 <= 45 00 00 14 len=4
00:00:03.647 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset 163b5c <= 46 00 00 14 len=4
00:00:03.647 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset 163cb0 <= 46 00 00 14 len=4
00:00:03.647 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset 163e68 <= 46 00 00 14 len=4
00:00:03.647 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset 163fe8 <= 46 00 00 14 len=4
00:00:03.647 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset 16416c <= 46 00 00 14 len=4
00:00:03.647 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset 3d30fc <= 09 03 80 52 len=4
00:00:03.647 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset 3d3104 <= 4B 0D 40 B8 len=4
00:00:03.647 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset 3d3110 <= 8D B9 40 A9 len=4
00:00:03.647 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset 3d3164 <= 05 00 00 14 len=4
00:00:03.647 I ModLoader Patch: Patching address offset 3d31c0 <= E9 03 0B AA len=4
00:00:03.813 I Ptc Initialize: Initializing Profiled Persistent Translation Cache (enabled: True).
00:00:07.092 I Ptc Load: Loaded Translation Cache (size: 254496624 bytes, translated functions: 190872).
00:00:07.153 I Ptc Load: Loaded Profiling Info (size: 665957 bytes, profiled functions: 190872).
00:00:07.166 I Loader LoadNsos: Loading image 0 at 0x0000000008000000...
00:00:07.168 I Loader LoadNsos: Loading image 1 at 0x0000000008004000...
00:00:07.198 I Loader LoadNsos: Loading image 2 at 0x000000000c66a000...
00:00:07.201 I Loader LoadNsos: Loading image 3 at 0x000000000cd13000...
00:00:07.210 I ModLoader LoadCheats: Build ids found for title 0100F2C0115B6000:
7501ABFE55FA41CFFEB46BD619BDCBF45B9CAE3A000000000000000000000000
082CE09B06E33A123CB1E2770F5F9147709033DB000000000000000000000000
A6BB7C6FFA9673769FA74ED3D7B054191F25D29C000000000000000000000000
B9046C31EB5D31271BE970FE732D38DF49C6AA21000000000000000000000000
00:00:07.214 I Application EnsureSaveData: Ensuring required savedata exists.
00:00:07.494 I Loader Start: Application Loaded: The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom v1.0.0 [0100f2c0115b6000] [64-bit]
00:00:07.503 I GUI.WindowThread Hid Configure: Configured Controller JoyconPair to Player1
00:00:07.861 I GUI.WindowThread Hid SetupNpad: Connected Controller JoyconPair to Player1
00:00:08.081 N GUI.RenderLoop Gpu PrintGpuInformation: NVIDIA Corporation NVIDIA GeForce GTX 1660 SUPEPCIe/SSE2 (4.6.0 NVIDIA 527.56)
00:00:08.116 I GPU.MainThread Gpu LoadShaders: Loading 0 shaders from the cache...
00:00:08.147 W GPU.MainThread Gpu LoadShaders: Error loading the shader cache. The cache file is corrupted.
00:00:08.159 I GPU.MainThread Gpu LoadShaders: Shader cache deleted due to corruption.
00:00:08.159 I GPU.MainThread Gpu LoadShaders: Shader cache loaded.
00:00:11.283 I HLE.GuestThread.19 Ptc LoadTranslations: 190872 translated functions loaded
00:00:11.462 S HLE.OsThread.20 ServiceAm GetAppletResourceUserId: Stubbed. {appletResourceUserId: 1}
00:00:11.475 S HLE.OsThread.20 ServiceAm AcquireForegroundRights: Stubbed.
00:00:11.476 S HLE.OsThread.20 ServiceAm SetFocusHandlingMode: Stubbed. {unknownFlag1: False ; unknownFlag2: False ; unknownFlag3: True}
00:00:11.476 S HLE.OsThread.20 ServiceAm SetOutOfFocusSuspendingEnabled: Stubbed. {outOfFocusSuspendingEnabled: False}
00:00:11.490 S HLE.OsThread.20 ServicePctl Initialize: Stubbed.
00:00:12.556 S HLE.OsThread.20 ServiceAm SetFocusHandlingMode: Stubbed. {unknownFlag1: True ; unknownFlag2: False ; unknownFlag3: True}
00:00:12.556 S HLE.OsThread.20 ServiceAm SetOutOfFocusSuspendingEnabled: Stubbed. {outOfFocusSuspendingEnabled: False}
00:00:12.557 S HLE.OsThread.20 ServiceAm SetRestartMessageEnabled: Stubbed. {restartMessageEnabled: True}
00:00:12.557 S HLE.OsThread.20 ServiceAm SetOperationModeChangedNotification: Stubbed. {operationModeChangedNotification: True}
00:00:12.557 S HLE.OsThread.20 ServiceAm SetPerformanceModeChangedNotification: Stubbed. {performanceModeChangedNotification: True}
00:00:13.845 S HLE.OsThread.10 ServiceNv FinishInitialize: Stubbed.
00:00:13.853 I HLE.OsThread.20 SurfaceFlinger CreateLayerFromId: Creating layer 1
00:00:13.856 I HLE.OsThread.20 SurfaceFlinger CreateLayerFromId: Creating layer 2
00:00:13.880 S HLE.OsThread.10 ServiceNv InitializeEx: Stubbed.
00:00:13.902 S HLE.OsThread.10 ServiceNv GetActiveSlotMask: Stubbed.
00:00:13.984 S HLE.OsThread.10 ServiceNv SetNvMapFd: Stubbed.
00:00:13.985 S HLE.OsThread.10 ServiceNv AllocGpfifoEx2: Stubbed.
00:00:13.986 S HLE.OsThread.10 ServiceNv AllocObjCtx: Stubbed.
00:00:13.987 S HLE.OsThread.10 ServiceNv SetErrorNotifier: Stubbed.
00:00:13.987 S HLE.OsThread.10 ServiceNv SetUserData: Stubbed.
00:00:13.987 S HLE.OsThread.10 ServiceNv SetTimeout: Stubbed.
00:00:13.987 S HLE.OsThread.10 ServiceNv SetTimeslice: Stubbed.
00:00:13.989 S HLE.OsThread.10 ServiceNv ZcullBind: Stubbed.
00:00:14.028 S HLE.OsThread.20 ServiceAcc InitializeApplicationInfo: Stubbed. {TitleId: 72324500776771584}
00:00:14.033 S HLE.OsThread.20 ServiceAcc IsUserAccountSwitchLocked: Stubbed.
00:00:14.033 S HLE.OsThread.20 ServiceNs CheckAddOnContentMountStatus: Stubbed.
00:00:14.051 S HLE.OsThread.9 ServiceHid ActiveNpadImpl: Stubbed. {appletResourceUserId: 1 ; revision: 3}
00:00:14.057 S HLE.OsThread.9 ServiceHid SetSupportedNpadIdType: Stubbed. 9 Players: Player1,Player2,Player3,Player4,Player5,Player6,Player7,Player8,Handheld
00:00:14.057 S HLE.OsThread.9 ServiceHid SetSupportedNpadStyleSet: Stubbed. {pid: 96 ; appletResourceUserId: 1 ; type: ProController, Handheld, JoyconPair, JoyconLeft, JoyconRight}
00:00:15.302 S HLE.OsThread.10 ServiceNv ZbcSetTable: Stubbed.
00:00:15.302 S HLE.OsThread.10 ServiceNv GetActiveSlotMask: Stubbed.
00:00:26.084 S HLE.OsThread.9 ServiceHid ActivateMouse: Stubbed. {appletResourceUserId: 1}
00:00:26.086 S HLE.OsThread.9 ServiceHid ActivateKeyboard: Stubbed. {appletResourceUserId: 1}
00:00:26.796 I HLE.OsThread.6 AudioRenderer AcquireSessionId: Registered new renderer (0)
00:00:26.800 I HLE.OsThread.6 AudioRenderer Initialize: Initializing with REV11
00:00:26.833 I AudioProcessor.Worker AudioRenderer Work: Starting audio processor
00:00:26.835 I AudioRendererManager.Worker AudioRenderer SendCommands: Starting audio renderer
00:00:26.837 I HLE.OsThread.6 AudioRenderer Start: Starting renderer id 0
00:00:26.899 S HLE.OsThread.6 ServiceAudio QueryAudioDeviceOutputEvent: Stubbed.
00:00:26.902 S HLE.OsThread.6 ServiceAudio GetActiveChannelCount: Stubbed.
00:00:26.939 I AudioProcessor.Worker Audio EnsureAudioStreamSetup: New audio stream setup with a target sample count of 240
00:00:28.621 S HLE.OsThread.20 ServiceAm SetOperationModeChangedNotification: Stubbed. {operationModeChangedNotification: True}
00:00:28.621 S HLE.OsThread.20 ServiceAm SetPerformanceModeChangedNotification: Stubbed. {performanceModeChangedNotification: True}
00:00:28.707 I HLE.OsThread.20 ServiceAm SetTerminateResult: Result = 0x0007d402 (ResultFsTargetNotFound (2002-1002)).
00:00:29.413 I HLE.GuestThread.38 Cpu PrintGuestStackTrace: Guest stack trace:
Process: The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom, PID: 96
0x000000000cda2d80 sdk:0x8fd80
0x000000000cda2e48 sdk:0x8fe48
0x000000000cda2f28 sdk:0x8ff28
0x000000000cde7eec sdk:0xd4eec
0x0000000008e34864 main:0xe30864
0x0000000008e340d4 main:0xe300d4
0x0000000008e33f64 main:0xe2ff64
0x000000000a7e02d0 main:0x27dc2d0
0x000000000a2c96cc main:0x22c56cc
0x000000000a9bf788 main:0x29bb788
0x000000000ce3d518 sdk:0x12a518
0x000000000ce432f4 sdk:0x1302f4
0x0000000000000000
​
​
00:00:29.422 I HLE.GuestThread.38 Cpu PrintGuestRegisterPrintout: Guest CPU registers:

X\[00\]: 0x0000000000000000 X\[01\]: 0x00000049cfeb1ba8 (SP:-0x01d8) X\[02\]: 0x0000000000000004 X\[03\]: 0x0000000000000000 X\[04\]: 0x0000000000000000 X\[05\]: 0x0000000000000000 X\[06\]: 0x0000000000000000 X\[07\]: 0x0000000000000000 X\[08\]: 0x0000000100000000 X\[09\]: 0x000000000cd13000 (sdk:0x0000) => X\[10\]: 0xfefefefefefefeff X\[11\]: 0x0000008000000000 X\[12\]: 0x0000000000000000 X\[13\]: 0x0000000000000002 X\[14\]: 0x0000000000000000 X\[15\]: 0x0000000000000002 X\[16\]: 0x000000000cda4700 (sdk:0x91700) => nn::diag::detail::Abort(nn::Result const\*) X\[17\]: 0x000000000da19520 X\[18\]: 0x0000000000000000 X\[19\]: 0x00000049cfeb1ba8 (SP:-0x01d8) X\[20\]: 0x0000000000000000 X\[21\]: 0x000000000d7c3757 X\[22\]: 0x000000000d7c3757 X\[23\]: 0x0000000000000000 X\[24\]: 0x000000000d7c3757 X\[25\]: 0x00000049cfeb1b50 (SP:-0x0180) X\[26\]: 0x000000000d7c3757 X\[27\]: 0x000000000cda2e48 (sdk:0x8fe48) => X\[28\]: 0x0000000000000000 FP: 0x00000049cfeb19d0 (SP) LR: 0x000000000cda4718 (sdk:0x91718) => nn::diag::detail::Abort(nn::Result const\*):0x0018 SP: 0x00000049cfeb19d0 (SP) PC: 0x000000000ce6b494 (sdk:0x158494) => 

​
​
00:00:29.438 W HLE.GuestThread.19 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.438 W HLE.GuestThread.21 KernelSvc : WaitSynchronization(handleIndex: 0xFFFFFFFF) = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.438 W HLE.GuestThread.22 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.439 W HLE.GuestThread.26 KernelSvc : SendSyncRequest() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.439 W HLE.GuestThread.34 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.439 W HLE.GuestThread.23 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.439 W HLE.GuestThread.28 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.439 W HLE.GuestThread.24 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.439 W HLE.GuestThread.49 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.439 W HLE.GuestThread.29 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.439 W HLE.GuestThread.25 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.439 W HLE.GuestThread.60 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.439 W HLE.GuestThread.30 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.439 W HLE.GuestThread.27 KernelSvc : SendSyncRequest() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.440 W HLE.GuestThread.36 KernelSvc : ArbitrateLock() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.440 W HLE.GuestThread.31 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.440 W HLE.GuestThread.32 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.440 W HLE.GuestThread.39 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.440 W HLE.GuestThread.33 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.440 W HLE.GuestThread.35 KernelSvc : ArbitrateLock() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.440 W HLE.GuestThread.40 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.440 W HLE.GuestThread.51 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.440 W HLE.GuestThread.41 KernelSvc : WaitProcessWideKeyAtomic() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.440 W HLE.GuestThread.52 KernelSvc : WaitSynchronization(handleIndex: 0xFFFFFFFF) = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.440 W HLE.GuestThread.57 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.440 W HLE.GuestThread.50 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.440 W HLE.GuestThread.58 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.440 W HLE.GuestThread.54 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.440 W HLE.GuestThread.55 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.440 W HLE.GuestThread.56 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.440 W HLE.GuestThread.59 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.440 W HLE.GuestThread.61 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.440 W HLE.GuestThread.62 KernelSvc : WaitForAddress() = TerminationRequested
00:00:29.540 E HLE.GuestThread.38 Application : Unhandled exception caught: Ryujinx.HLE.Exceptions.GuestBrokeExecutionException: The guest program broke execution!
at Ryujinx.HLE.HOS.Kernel.SupervisorCall.Syscall.Break(UInt64 reason) in C:\Users\zatoc\Documents\Ryujinx depth fix + misc + hacky crash fix + experimental crash fix\src\Ryujinx.HLE\HOS\Kernel\SupervisorCall\Syscall.cs:line 1878
at Ryujinx.HLE.HOS.Kernel.SupervisorCall.SyscallDispatch.Break64(Syscall syscall, IExecutionContext context) in C:\Users\zatoc\Documents\Ryujinx depth fix + misc + hacky crash fix + experimental crash fix\src\Ryujinx.HLE\Ryujinx.Horizon.Kernel.Generators\Ryujinx.Horizon.Generators.Kernel.SyscallGenerator\SyscallDispatch.g.cs:line 1807
at Ryujinx.HLE.HOS.Kernel.SupervisorCall.SyscallDispatch.Dispatch64(Syscall syscall, IExecutionContext context, Int32 id) in C:\Users\zatoc\Documents\Ryujinx depth fix + misc + hacky crash fix + experimental crash fix\src\Ryujinx.HLE\Ryujinx.Horizon.Kernel.Generators\Ryujinx.Horizon.Generators.Kernel.SyscallGenerator\SyscallDispatch.g.cs:line 3440
at Ryujinx.HLE.HOS.Kernel.SupervisorCall.SyscallHandler.SvcCall(IExecutionContext context, UInt64 address, Int32 id) in C:\Users\zatoc\Documents\Ryujinx depth fix + misc + hacky crash fix + experimental crash fix\src\Ryujinx.HLE\HOS\Kernel\SupervisorCall\SyscallHandler.cs:line 17
at ARMeilleure.Instructions.NativeInterface.SupervisorCall(UInt64 address, Int32 imm) in C:\Users\zatoc\Documents\Ryujinx depth fix + misc + hacky crash fix + experimental crash fix\src\ARMeilleure\Instructions\NativeInterface.cs:line 50
at ARMeilleure.Translation.Translator.Execute(ExecutionContext context, UInt64 address) in C:\Users\zatoc\Documents\Ryujinx depth fix + misc + hacky crash fix + experimental crash fix\src\ARMeilleure\Translation\Translator.cs:line 150
at Ryujinx.Cpu.Jit.JitCpuContext.Execute(IExecutionContext context, UInt64 address) in C:\Users\zatoc\Documents\Ryujinx depth fix + misc + hacky crash fix + experimental crash fix\src\Ryujinx.Cpu\Jit\JitCpuContext.cs:line 32
at Ryujinx.HLE.HOS.ArmProcessContext`1.Execute(IExecutionContext context, UInt64 codeAddress) in C:\Users\zatoc\Documents\Ryujinx depth fix + misc + hacky crash fix + experimental crash fix\src\Ryujinx.HLE\HOS\ArmProcessContext.cs:line 50
at Ryujinx.HLE.HOS.Kernel.Threading.KThread.ThreadStart() in C:\Users\zatoc\Documents\Ryujinx depth fix + misc + hacky crash fix + experimental crash fix\src\Ryujinx.HLE\HOS\Kernel\Threading\KThread.cs:line 1266

Online cotton bed sheets refer to bed sheets made from cotton that are available for purchase through internet-based platforms. Cotton is a popular material choice for bed sheets due to its softness, breathability, and durability. When shopping for cotton bed sheets online, you have access to a wide range of options in terms of colors, patterns, thread counts, and sizes. Cotton bed sheets provide a comfortable and cozy sleeping experience, as cotton is known for its ability to regulate temperature and wick away moisture. By purchasing cotton bed sheets online,

https://bafurnitureclearance.au/blogs/ba-furniture-clearance-blog/expert-tips-for-stylish-bedroom-design
​
Welcome to our bedroom styling tips blog, where we strive to bring you the latest trends, expert advice, and inspiration for creating beautiful living spaces. In this blog, we delve into the realm of bedroom styling, guiding you through the process of transforming your bedroom into a serene sanctuary. With our expert tips and timeless design principles, you can create a stylish bedroom that perfectly reflects your personal taste and provides a haven of tranquility for restful nights and rejuvenating mornings.

Selecting the Perfect Color Palette:

Choosing the right color palette is essential for setting the desired ambiance in your bedroom. Soft, muted tones work wonders in creating a calm and soothing atmosphere. Shades of blue, green, and lavender are particularly popular choices, as they promote relaxation and tranquility. However, don't be afraid to inject a pop of colour through accent pieces or artwork to add visual interest and personality.

The Power of Lighting:

Lighting plays a crucial role in bedroom design, creating ambiance and enhancing functionality. For a serene atmosphere, consider incorporating layered lighting. Start with a central overhead fixture for general illumination. Add bedside table lamps or wall-mounted sconces to provide warm, soft light for reading and relaxation. Dimmer switches are an excellent addition, allowing you to adjust the lighting intensity to suit your mood.

Furniture Placement and Layout:

Efficient furniture placement and thoughtful layout can make a significant difference in the overall aesthetic and functionality of your bedroom. Begin by determining the focal point of the room, which is typically the bed. Position the bed against a wall or in the center of the room, depending on available space and personal preference. Surround it with carefully chosen furniture pieces like nightstands, dressers, and chairs to create a harmonious and balanced arrangement.

Luxurious Bedding and Textiles:

Bedding and textiles are the ultimate indulgence in bedroom styling. Opt for high-quality sheets with a thread count that feels luxurious against your skin. Layer your bed with plush duvets, blankets, and an assortment of throw pillows to add texture and visual interest. Experiment with different fabrics, patterns, and textures, ensuring they complement your overall colour scheme and design concept.

Window Treatments and Privacy:

Windows are essential for allowing natural light to fill your bedroom, but they also require careful consideration when it comes to privacy and styling. Choose window treatments that offer a balance between functionality and aesthetics. Elegant curtains or blinds can be paired with sheer panels to filter light while maintaining privacy. Consider adding blackout curtains or blinds if you desire complete darkness for better sleep quality.

Incorporating Natural Elements:

Bringing the outdoors inside can create a soothing and organic ambiance in your bedroom. Incorporate natural elements such as potted plants, fresh flowers, or a small indoor fountain to add a touch of tranquility. Natural materials like wood and stone can be introduced through furniture, flooring, or accent pieces to enhance the overall sense of serenity.

Thoughtful Storage Solutions:

A clutter-free bedroom is essential for maintaining a calm and relaxing atmosphere. Thoughtful storage solutions are key to achieving this. Consider furniture pieces with built-in storage, such as bedside tables with drawers or ottomans with hidden compartments. Utilise under-bed storage boxes or invest in a stylish wardrobe to keep your clothes and belongings organised and out of sight.

Personal Touches and Styling Accents:

To truly make your bedroom feel like a sanctuary, add personal touches and styling accents that reflect your individuality. Display cherished artwork, photographs, or sentimental objects that evoke positive emotions. Incorporate scented candles or essential oil diffusers to create a fragrant and inviting atmosphere. Pay attention to details like decorative mirrors, rugs, or statement furniture.

I'm trying to write a scraper for a website, but I am encountering two issues.
The main issue
The scraper works successfully without proxies enabled, and can achieve a rate of 800 requests per second. When proxies are enabled, this rate drops to ~10.
I am writing code in Java (as it's a language I'm familiar with). The code runs one producer thread that creates tasks, and multiple consumer threads, which process tasks asynchronously with a limit on co-currency.
My issue is that when making these requests, it seems as if not all proxies in the database are utilized properly.
For each proxy in the database, I hold the following information:
connection_string, usage_count, success_count, failed_count, fail_streak, cooldown_until, last_used, status
To select proxies from the database, I do
String query = "SELECT id, connection_string, usage_count, success_count, failed_count, fail_streak, cooldown_until " +"FROM test_proxy " +"WHERE (cooldown_until IS NULL OR NOW() > cooldown_until) " +"ORDER BY CASE WHEN usage_count = 0 THEN 1 ELSE success_count / usage_count END DESC, last_used ASC " +"LIMIT 150";
I load the proxies into memory, and then run an update on the database every second using batch, and reload the data. This prevents a huge amount of requests from having to be made to the database. To fetch a particular proxy, I do the following:
I load the proxies into memory, and then run an update on the database every second using batch, and reload the data. This prevents a huge amount of requests from having to be made to the database. To fetch a particular proxy, I do the following

 public Proxy getNewProxy() { synchronized (proxies) { if(proxies.size() == 0){ return null; } Random random = new Random(); int randomIndex = random.nextInt(proxies.size()); Proxy proxy = proxies.get(randomIndex); return proxy; } } 

When a request fails/succeeds, the following occurs

public void onSuccess(){ this.usageCount.incrementAndGet(); this.successCount.incrementAndGet(); this.failStreak.set(0); this.cooldownUntil.set(System.currentTimeMillis()); } 

this.usageCount.incrementAndGet(); this.successCount.incrementAndGet(); this.failStreak.set(0); this.cooldownUntil.set(System.currentTimeMillis()); }

public void onFailure() { this.usageCount.incrementAndGet(); this.failedCount.incrementAndGet(); this.failStreak.incrementAndGet(); int baseCooldownTime = 1000; double exponentialFactor = 1.5; long cooldownTime = baseCooldownTime * (long) Math.pow(exponentialFactor, failStreak.get() - 1); long cooldownUntil = System.currentTimeMillis() + cooldownTime; // TODO: check new cooldownuntil time is not more than 1 hour //System.out.println("back off time = " + (cooldownTime / 1000)); if(cooldownUntil > this.cooldownUntil.get()){ this.cooldownUntil.set(System.currentTimeMillis() + cooldownTime); } } 

The code only seems to use 50 of the proxies within the first 10 minutes, and only achieves a rate of ~10 requests per second.
I have been stuck on this issue for 2 months. I need a better strategy picking proxies, in order to optimize the amount of potential requests that can be made every second.
Currently I rank all proxies by success, and last used, then limit to the top 50, and select a random proxy.
If you have any suggestions on a better method, other than round-robin, please let me know, as I'm struggling a little!

I'm trying to write a scraper for a website, but I am encountering two issues.
The main issue
The scraper works successfully without proxies enabled, and can achieve a rate of 800 requests per second. When proxies are enabled, this rate drops to ~10.
I am writing code in Java (as it's a language I'm familiar with). The code runs one producer thread that creates tasks, and multiple consumer threads, which process tasks asynchronously with a limit on co-currency.
My issue is that when making these requests, it seems as if not all proxies in the database are utilized properly.
For each proxy in the database, I hold the following information:
connection_string, usage_count, success_count, failed_count, fail_streak, cooldown_until, last_used, status
To select proxies from the database, I do
String query = "SELECT id, connection_string, usage_count, success_count, failed_count, fail_streak, cooldown_until " +"FROM test_proxy " +"WHERE (cooldown_until IS NULL OR NOW() > cooldown_until) " +"ORDER BY CASE WHEN usage_count = 0 THEN 1 ELSE success_count / usage_count END DESC, last_used ASC " +"LIMIT 150";
I load the proxies into memory, and then run an update on the database every second using batch, and reload the data. This prevents a huge amount of requests from having to be made to the database. To fetch a particular proxy, I do the following:
I load the proxies into memory, and then run an update on the database every second using batch, and reload the data. This prevents a huge amount of requests from having to be made to the database. To fetch a particular proxy, I do the following

 public Proxy getNewProxy() { synchronized (proxies) { if(proxies.size() == 0){ return null; } Random random = new Random(); int randomIndex = random.nextInt(proxies.size()); Proxy proxy = proxies.get(randomIndex); return proxy; } } 

When a request fails/succeeds, the following occurs

public void onSuccess(){ this.usageCount.incrementAndGet(); this.successCount.incrementAndGet(); this.failStreak.set(0); this.cooldownUntil.set(System.currentTimeMillis()); } 

this.usageCount.incrementAndGet(); this.successCount.incrementAndGet(); this.failStreak.set(0); this.cooldownUntil.set(System.currentTimeMillis()); }

public void onFailure() { this.usageCount.incrementAndGet(); this.failedCount.incrementAndGet(); this.failStreak.incrementAndGet(); int baseCooldownTime = 1000; double exponentialFactor = 1.5; long cooldownTime = baseCooldownTime * (long) Math.pow(exponentialFactor, failStreak.get() - 1); long cooldownUntil = System.currentTimeMillis() + cooldownTime; // TODO: check new cooldownuntil time is not more than 1 hour //System.out.println("back off time = " + (cooldownTime / 1000)); if(cooldownUntil > this.cooldownUntil.get()){ this.cooldownUntil.set(System.currentTimeMillis() + cooldownTime); } } 

The code only seems to use 50 of the proxies within the first 10 minutes, and only achieves a rate of ~10 requests per second.
I have been stuck on this issue for 2 months. I need a better strategy picking proxies, in order to optimize the amount of potential requests that can be made every second.
Currently I rank all proxies by success, and last used, then limit to the top 50, and select a random proxy.
If you have any suggestions on a better method, other than round-robin, please let me know, as I'm struggling a little!

Obligatory link spam:
Unit Rankings
Rating Information
Damage comparison spreadsheet
Global Exclusive Podcast
Previous Thread

Apologies

It's finally here!
God this rerate has taken so much longer than it should’ve, and there’s not really a good reason for that - I just kinda fell into a motivational black hole and it got more and more dragged out. So I’m sorry all, but we’re finally here and can hopefully return to our regular weekly updates from now on.

Leader Skills

Let's start with the thing that prompted this whole debacle in the first place - how are we handling leader skills?
So, to start with, there wasn’t really a perfect answer - Giving units their best available leader skill generally requires very specific, often premium teammates, which just very much goes against the core point/philosophies of the wiki ratings of having units primarily under their own power, so we weren’t doing that. You can look at other DV/Clash oriented sheets designed for endgame players for that (I’m a fan of Sinzar’s one)
So then, if it’s under their own power, do the leader units themselves get their own buff like with regular AoE stat buffs on them? Well, that has the problem of all the leader units looking very overinflated on the damage comparison sheet, when in reality a lot of the other units they buff should be alongside them, and that’s not really a useful outcome.
So in the end, our solution is for everyone to have their damage calced with the very readily available 100% stat leader skills, even the leader units themselves, and then units with strong leader skills are getting a notable bonus to their final rating, similar to that for support functionality. While this feels a little weird to have leaders being calced without their own buff, I think it’s overall the most fair way to do it for both the damage sheet and the final ratings page, and said leaders should always still end up at the same or higher final rating that they would from their damage benchmark with their own LS applied to them.
The exact LS bonus varies with both the strength of their stat buffs and the coverage of their tag quality - So for example FA Rain gets the biggest bonus right now for good strength stats on the best coverage tag (FFBE). The classic element leaders like Dioxus & Zack land in the middle with good stats and average coverage, while at the bottom is Fina/Lasswell with bad stats and average coverage, and Ibara with meh stats and bad coverage. Duane and Nora end up just below the element leaders with their bonus from the combo of bad stats and good coverage. (We decided that clash coverage is just a little worse than FFBE coverage because in general there seems to be more strong non-clash FFBE units than there are non-ffbe clash units. I think lots of players having the nier units just creates some perception bias. Still, clash is easily the second best coverage.)
You can look at the full breakdown of point bonuses from these and the other changes below in the Benchmarks & Adjustments tab of the damage spreadsheet that’s linked at the top of this post.

Parameter Updates

So here’s the part that actually made everything take so long - a damage rerate means a modernization of our calculation parameters and a full equipment rebuild of every damage dealer above a certain threshold, which, also including the new units that’d been released in this period, is just shy of 80 different units. For what’s actually changed - first of all the builds themselves are now allowed to include any 5* Base STMRs! I’ve been kind of holding out on this in the hope that the builder would add a way to automatically differentiate between 5* sourced items and NV-sourced ones, which… didn’t happen, so we finally made the swap of creating a fixed inventory account that we build with to add items to. This also hopefully is speeding up the builds a decent amount, but it does carry the risk of legal gear with unit-specific buffs being missed from builds, so feel free to double check things on the sheet and question things in these threads! (I know nobody will)
Next, on the calc sheet side, most of the external support amounts have been bumped up. As always, they’re still going to be a bit below optimal level to give advantage to those that provide for themselves, but with less of a heavy penalty to those completely missing a certain area. Stat buffs remain at 300% LB damage buff increases from 150% to 250% (it was lowballed before, now it’s highballed a bit) Amps are up from 25% to 45% Elemental Imperils are up from 120% to 130% Weapon imperil of 20% has been introduced.
Lastly, the final adjustment points that’re added after their damage benchmark is set have been adjusted a bit. The main thing added is element-lock penalties: -0.5 if their main damage is a magic attack (non-imbueable), -0.25 if their main damage move has an innate element but can be mixed with an imbue, and +0.25 for no significant preference in kit (which generally is a helper for oldesubpar units). Stuff like most newer GLEXs that’re properly imbueable but have a decent innate element preference (such as from a 150 amp) are just neutral.
Then there’s the leader skill adjustment mentioned above (the 100% ones don’t count for anything though) and the existing support bonuses have been basically redone just to kind of recalibrate them in comparison to each other, and to in general make the bonuses a little more generous and shift weightings a bit on what adds more value these days.
Again, you can see the full breakdown of all of this in Benchmarks & Adjustments on the sheet.

Support Bump & Non-damage Roundup

As is usual with these, a bump for all the non-damage units to re-align things as roles shift at different rates is necessary, especially when this time the damage dealers also saw some significant gains from the recalcs. This time, they’re getting all bumped up by two points, which leaves Abigail, Sylvie, Melissa (clash) and Rain (clash) as the four best girls sharing the top spot.
Now, I’m not doing a breakdown of every single release and upgrade released in the last two months because god this is already SO LONG, but you can have a quick one for all those who aren’t damage dealers. For the DDs, just check the updated lists.
Fina -Dark Lineage - She’s a great killer support but her stats/element stuff is a bit subpar compared to a lot of the other good JP buffers, and lots of stuff has gaps in its uptime. At base she’d score below them, but her leader skill is serviceable if you’re lacking a better one, so that boosts her back up to being on par with lots of the good 45% amper supports such as the last two premium finas at 32.5
Sakura -Dark Lineage- & Veritas of the Frost - Speaking of good JP 45% amper supports, here’s two more. They fit pretty comfortably alongside the top end of their peers, also at 32.5
Angeal - For breakers, we’ve had a lot of the previous 160% imperil breakers sitting at 32.0, with Lion being very borderline at the top end. To me, Angeal having his biggest break+imperil on a CD with decent uptime instead of a single-use grandis is enough of an advantage to get him into 32.5.
Rufus Shinra Crowns - We almost missed this guy because he’s very underwhelming. Still, he does now have fairly serviceable breaks & imperils with a two stack mirage to spam, but mostly feels Ninja edge with small downgrades, so gets 31.0, half a point below him.
Yshe Crowns - Another 160% imperil breaker, but this one’s just slightly worse than Lion so she’s back down in 32.0
Blades of Black Flame Raegen - Right now his damage punches high enough to match his breaker rating, but for futureproofing through bumps, he’s getting the breaker one right now. Once again, similar to Lion & Co with having both 89% breaks, but trading one 160% imperil for two 150% imperils. It’s flexibility, but since you’re usually not making use of both at once, that’s a fairly even trade to me and he joins the 32.0 crowd.
Red-eyed Sage Sol - Similar to Raegen, except he also has a tasty ice/dark imperil field, which bumps him to 32.5 for his breaker rating.
A few other old units have also shifted from damage to non-damage ratings in this round such as Fryevia, but I’m not listing them all here. There will probably also still be a bit of cleanup to do on the ratings page around notes and roles and such, but I really just wanted to finally get this out. If you’ve actually read all the way down this far, congratulations and thank you. See you next week, hopefully.

Let's do the shotgun approach. I'm going to be discussing all five earning plays in one post, and then put my conclusions at the end. All of these stocks are putting out earnings today, after hours. Yesterday I posted about HPQ going down, and it went down, puts up ~80%. So let's get into the details of this post.
Starting with CrowdStrike Holdings (CRWD), where analysts are predicting earnings of $0.509 per share compared to earnings of $0.310 per share in the same quarter of the previous year. They are also expecting the company to report $677.4 million, an increase of over the prior year quarter when the company reported $487.8 million. With regard to the current fiscal year, analysts expect a profit per share of $2.33, while the previous year saw a profit of $1.54.
CrowdStrike’s first-quarter fiscal 2024 results are likely to reflect the benefits of the continued solid demand for its products, given the healthy environment of the global security market. The increasing number of people logging into employers' networks has triggered a greater need for security and might have spurred the demand for CRWD’s products in the fiscal first quarter. A strong pipeline of deals indicates the same.
Stellar revenue growth in subscriptions might have contributed significantly to the first quarter’s top line. Further, the increasing number of net new subscription customers may have acted as a tailwind.
Moreover, CrowdStrike’s collaboration with Amazon Web Services (AWS) is an upside, benefiting the company from its products’ availability on the AWS platform. The expansion in the volume of transactions through Amazon’s AWS Marketplace, growth in co-selling opportunities with AWS salesforce and the uptake of AWS service integrations are likely to have contributed to CRWD’s earnings in the to-be-reported quarter.
However, elevated expenses for enhancing sales and marketing capabilities and increased investments in research and development are likely to have weighed on the company’s fiscal first-quarter bottom line.
Next is the software-as-a-Service (SaaS) provider Salesforce (CRM), wallstreet expects CRM to post adjusted earnings of $1.61 per share, which is on the higher end of the company’s guidance and nearly double that of the Q1FY23 figure of $0.98 per share. CRM has consistently beaten earnings expectations in the past eight quarters, with a strategically built portfolio covering virtually all aspects of digital transformation. So far this year, the stock has gained 59.9%, outperforming the S&P 500's 10% gain.
Similarly, the analysts expect Salesforce to post revenue of $8.18 billion, which is also on the higher end of the company’s outlook and represents a 10.4% year-over-year growth. However, sequentially, the revenue expectation shows a modest decline of 2.4%.
Salesforce’s first-quarter performance is likely to have gained from its focus on building and expanding relationships with leading brands across industries and geographies. Also, significant growth opportunities in the public sector are expected to have been a tailwind in the fiscal first quarter.
The company’s ability to offer integrated solutions for customers’ business problems is likely to have been a key growth driver. The firm’s products, like Trailhead and myTrailhead, are helping companies through their transformation processes and increasing business scale with modern technology.
Salesforce’s quarterly performance is likely to have benefited from the robust demand environment as customers are undergoing a major digital transformation. The customer relationship management software provider’s focus on introducing more aligned products per customer needs is expected to have boosted its top line in the quarter.
Also, the acquisitions of Slack, Mobify and Vlocity are anticipated to have aided CRM’s top line during the to-be-reported quarter. Growth across its four major cloud service offerings, Sales Cloud, Service Cloud, Platform, and Other and Marketing & Commerce Cloud, is anticipated to have boosted Salesforce’s subscriptions and supported its revenues.
However, a decline in software spending by small and medium businesses amid the macroeconomic uncertainty due to the pandemic and the ongoing Russia-Ukraine war might have affected Salesforce’s fiscal first-quarter performance. Further, stiff competition from Oracle and Microsoft is a concern, along with forex headwinds.
On May 26, Goldman Sachs analyst Kash Rangan reiterated his Buy rating on CRM stock ahead of its earnings report. Rangan has set a price target of $325, implying a massive 50.8% upside potential from current levels.
Rangan is highly optimistic about Salesforce’s quarterly winning streak and the potential tailwind from the artificial intelligence (AI) race. Even so, the analyst cited that this will be the first time that CRM will recognize a sequential decline in subscription revenue.
Despite that, Rangan noted, “As a system of record with a plethora of customer data that can help train its LLM (large language models), CRM can benefit from Generative AI. As the macro begins to inflect, we see CRM being well positioned as it realizes the benefits from sales efficiency efforts and workforce reductions of recent quarters.” Salesforce said it will integrate its generative AI Einstein GPT into every facet of the company - sales, service, marketing, commerce and IT interaction. Pricing details were not disclosed.
I know everyone wants to hear it, next is C3.ai (AI). There's no denying it, the growing popularity of artificial intelligence, in particular ChatGPT, is more than just hype. It is real. As you may have noticed, one company that's riding high on the AI wave is C3.ai, which has seen its stock more than doubled as interest among investors surge. The stock has gone on a breathtaking run over the past thirty days, rising close to 90%, compared with the 3% rise in the S&P 500 index. On a year-to-date basis the performance looks even more astonishing, skyrocketing 194% compared with the 10% rise in the S&P 500 index. How much higher can its shares go?
C3.ai is benefiting from the increasing adoption of its services, including C3 Generative AI Product Suite, C3 AI Ex Machina (wasn't that a movie?), C3 AI ESG and C3 AI CRM. An expanding product portfolio is expected to have remained a key catalyst in driving demand for the company’s fully-integrated AI products in the fiscal fourth quarter.
During the to-be-reported quarter, the company made significant development toward its Generative AI platform, facilitating the ease of use and the capability of its enterprise AI applications. This is expected to have driven the top line.
C3.ai has been benefiting from strengthening industry and technology-specific partnerships. From its industry partnerships with the likes of Baker Hughes in oil & gas & chemical markets and Booz Allen in government defense sector, C3.ai has been leveraging domain expertise to expand its customer footprint.
With its tech partners, C3 has been benefiting from strength in its sales capabilities besides tech and product functionality. Partnerships with the likes of Google Cloud, Amazon Web Services (AWS), Azure and Accenture are expected to have driven the top line in the to-be-reported quarter.
Aside from recently announcing that its generative AI product suite is now available as a public offer on Alphabet's Google (GOOG , GOOGL) Cloud Marketplace, the company also issued preliminary results that included positive cash flow in FQ4. This suggests that the company’s $800 million cash currently on its balance sheet will grow. Its management has sought to change the company’s business model, shifting the business away from short-term revenues to a transaction-based pricing method, while boosting long-term revenues by growing its customer base.
Those initiatives appear to be working with growth rates starting to re-accelerate. CEO Thomas Siebel said, "Since we announced C3 Generative AI, we've had intense interest from current customers and prospects to get these capabilities deployed and in use across their systems.” The product suite features enterprise search, allowing businesses to search across their database to locate and retrieve relevant information. On Wednesday, the company will look to prove that it is here to stay and has a sustainable path towards profitability.
For the three months that ended April, Wall Street expects the Redwood City, Calif.-based company to post a per-share loss of 17 cents on revenue of $71.32 million. This compares to the year-ago quarter when the loss was 21 cents per share on revenue of $72.32 million. For the full year, the loss is expected to be 46 cents per share, narrowing from 73 cents a year ago, while full-year revenue of $265.67 million would rise 5.1% year over year.
The company still has a lot to prove and important questions to answer. Namely, does it have a strong enough moat to establish a leadership position in enterprise AI software? C3.ai ended Q3 with 236 customers, the same total reported at the end of Q2. In other words, there has been no sequential growth in the customer base, suggesting there’s a lack in competitive advantage and/or product interest.
As noted earlier, a few quarters ago, the company moved towards a new pricing model to help onboard new customers at a lower startup cost. This will allow the company to charge more when these same customers utilize the software at higher levels. As a result of the pricing change, there was a noticeable dip in Q3 revenues. Although the company surpassed consensus estimates, producing Q3 revenue $66.67 million, the figure declined 4.45% year over year.
The Q3 adjusted loss of 6 cents per share did surpass estimates by 16 cents. Despite the nearly 5% dip in revenues, the stock soared higher. Investors looked beyond the current numbers and instead focused on the fact that the trough in revenues had been reached. The belief is that the company’s consumption-based pricing model is now poised to generate even more revenue than the subscription model it once used. As such, the guidance the company provides today will be a key factor in the stock’s near-term direction.
Strong demand for the company’s Enterprise AI software, driven by accelerated digital modernization across major industries, is expected to have aided fiscal fourth-quarter performance.
Okta, Inc (OKTA) is next. analysts expect earnings of $0.118 per share compared to losses of $0.270 per share from the same quarter last year. They expect Okta to report sales of $511.0 million, an increase of 23.16% over the same period last year. Looking at the full year, analysts expect a profit of $0.760 per share. In the previous year there was a profit of $0.040 per share.
The company’s first-quarter fiscal 2024 results are expected to reflect the benefits of increased use cases of identity solutions and an expanding product portfolio.
Okta is expected to have experienced strong demand for its Workforce and Customer Identity solutions. Continuous innovation in its solutions have helped Okta score notable enterprises such as Sonos, Hewlett Packard Enterprise, MassMutual and OpenAI. Its products’ ability to automate processes, secure data and reduce costs has been another positive.
Demand for the company’s solutions has been strong due to the deployment of cloud and hybrid IT, digital transformation projects and the adoption of Zero Trust security. The momentum is expected to have continued in the to-be-reported quarter.
These factors are expected to have expanded the customer base in the fiscal first quarter. In the fiscal fourth quarter, Okta added 550 customers, bringing the total customer count to 17,600, up 17% year over year. Customers with more than $100K in Annual Contract Value increased 27% year over year.
However, Okta is expected to have faced challenges in execution and heightened attrition. Challenging macro environment and unfavourable forex are potential headwinds. These factors are expected to have hurt its fiscal fourth-quarter prospects.
Finally, let's take a look at Nordstrom (JWN). Their first-quarter fiscal 2023 results are expected to reflect the significant impacts of decelerating demand trends. Reduced consumer spending amid lower income groups, stemming from the tough macroeconomic environment, has been hurting revenues across both banners. Analysts expect losses of $0.105 per share compared to losses of $0.060 per share in the same quarter of the previous year. They also are expecting the company to report $3.16 billion, an decrease of 11.59% over the prior year quarter. With regard to the current fiscal year, analysts expect a profit per share of $1.87, while the previous year saw a profit of $1.69.
Management expects the impact of the winding down of Canada operations to hurt revenues in fiscal 2023. The impacts of the closure are likely to get reflected in the fiscal first-quarter results. I anticipate a decline in revenues in the to-be-reported quarter. Moreover, I expect sales to decline for both the Nordstrom banner and the Nordstrom Rack segment.
In order to maintain healthy inventory levels, Nordstrom has been undertaking additional markdowns. The higher markdowns have been weighing on gross margin, which is likely to have continued in the to-be-reported quarter.
However, the company is committed to enhancing customer experience via its Closer to You strategy, optimized supply chain and better efficiency. These endeavors are expected to have slightly offset the aforementioned declines.
Nordstrom has been focused on technology advancement by boosting e-commerce and digital networks, supply-chain channel improvement, and marketing efforts. The digital business has been witnessing gains from improved digital traffic across both Nordstrom and Nordstrom Rack, as well as increased utilization of Buy Online, Pick Up In-Store service. Its mobile app has also been performing well. Alongside these, the integration of Rack.com into Nordstrom.com is anticipated to have contributed to the company's top line in the to-be-reported quarter.
So what to do for earnings?
Just to keep it sweet and simple, I'm getting calls on CRWD, CRM, AI, and OKTA. And I'm getting puts on JWN. I don't expect all of them to hit, I just like to throw my money on the table and see what flies. Keep in mind tho, as with all my other posts, these are entirely meant to just educate people about what we tend to look for when making an earning prediction. It by no means can be considered financial or investment advice.

TL;DR (spoilers): You, and anyone who wants to try the challenge with you if it's a multiplayer game, are a trans ally, and your job is to collect $25,000 or the equivalent thereof in in-game money (rounded up to the next smallest divisible part) for your transgender friend's transition in less than 31 in-game years. Everything is allowed. You do not have to finish the game.
Want a new and interesting way to play your favorite videogame? I got one with a transgender theme that is interesting, challenging, easy to implement, and compatible with almost any videogame, so it's a Mario challenge, a Pokémon challenge, a Minecraft challenge, and so on and so forth, all at the same time!

The Plot

You, and anyone who wants to try the challenge with you if it's a multiplayer game, are a trans ally, and your job is to collect money to pay for your transgender friend's transition. You win by acquiring enough in-game money. You are allowed to consult the internet, use passwords from the internet, commit in-game crimes, purchase microtransactions, abuse glitches, use cheat codes, and even hack the game to reach your goal, but is it really worth the effort? You are kinda expected to use the easiest way to win the challenge that you know of.

The Rules

Rule #1: You have to get the money you need for a transition. In order to make the challenge less boring for you, I did the research for you and came to the result of $25,000. However, this value might change if you try out this challenge in the far future, meaning that this challenge technically changes depending on when you attempt it. The value is expected to rise even further with inflation, or perhaps it might be reduced with the invention of more efficient surgery techniques. If the USA ever starts getting the universal healthcare system or a societal breakdown makes these surgeries impossible, this challenge will refer to the cost of the legal name & gender change, instead. And if that also ever becomes free then just choose a different country where it isn't free yet. But this is not going to change anytime soon (When do you think this challenge will become obsolete?) so, for now, you just have to remember to collect $25,000 in in-game money. This applies to every game that uses $ for in-game money. If the game uses £ or ¥ or € or any other real-world value, you'll have to convert it. Here's an online tool for converting currencies, which also supports various cryptocurrencies and custom rate dates. If the maximum amount of in-game money you can hold at once is less then the challenge is simply impossible. This only applies to non-videogame currencies.
Rule #2: If the in-game currency is fictional then you'll have to convert it (rounded up to the next smallest divisible part). It's easy if you can buy in-game money with real money, even if that feature doesn't work because of a glitch or something. Otherwise, you'll have to do some research. If you can't find any direct information on the internet, I would suggest starting here to get a basic idea on how to calculate that. If there are multiple in-game currencies you are allowed to split the price of the transition among them in any way you want, provided you know the value of all of them. If there is no in-game currency then you are allowed to use points instead. If the game doesn't have points either then you can try to invent a substitute currency but it has to be something that would actually work as a substitute currency in the world you're in. If that's not possible either then the only way for you to win this challenge is to raise real money by doing a let's play of the game. But then you'll have to actually pay for a real trans person's transition (yourself included) or donate the money to transgender-related causes to actually win the challenge. Here's a website that lets you donate for transgender causes. If the amount of in-game money you can hold at once is less or you were unable to find out how much you need then you are also allowed to simply collect the maximum possible amount instead because games will never ask you for more money than you can hold for a single product, meaning that this would have to be the in-game prize of a transition, as transitions are always for only a single person. This only applies to videogame currencies.
Rule #3: You do not need to finish the game. All you need to do to win this challenge is to get the money somehow. Please keep in mind that the exchange rate isn't constant. The exact amount you need to win the challenge has to be enough in the moment when you have the amount. You automatically win the challenge the moment this is the case.
Rule #4: You need to get the money in less than 31 in-game years. This number was calculated by subtracting the age at which children begin to have an innate sense of their own gender (4 years) from the average lifespan of a trans person (35 years). If the game has time-travelling elements, you are allowed to use those to extend the time limit. However, it only counts if this actually involves time itself and not just the timer. The same also goes the other way around: Travelling into the future or even moving in relativistic speeds will decrease the time limit. If the time limit runs out, I hope you have a way to return back to the past later!
Rule #5: If you can choose between multiple difficulty settings, you are allowed to choose the easiest one. In fact, you are expected to. Trans people are already on hard mode and the idea of being an ally is to specifically use the possibilities given to you to help those with fewer possibilities than you. If you have the option to select an easier difficulty setting which would make it easier for you to win this challenge, use it. Even if you're already used to playing on a higher difficulty mode. Not doing so would be considered bad strategy on your part. You are allowed to choose a higher difficulty setting, but please only do so if this actually gives you some advantages, like more rewards, more levels, or faster gameplay. This challenge gives you no bonus points for selecting a higher difficulty setting.
Rule #6: Emulation, and all tricks that come with it, are explicitly allowed. Doing so might be against the law but it is explicitly not against the rules of this challenge. The reason for this is because being transgender has been illegal for a long time and still is in many states, forcing many people to break the law in order to live their lives. The police have historically targeted trans and gender non-conforming folks. Stonewall was a riot against police brutality. I am not advocating for doing anything illegal. I am, however, saying that you should never use the law to argue for the morality of anything trans-related, as doing so would be disrespectful towards a huge part of transgender history. Therefore, this rule will remain in effect even if being transgender ever becomes legal worldwide.
In order to make the challenge even less boring for you, I have started researching loads of fictional currencies and how much money you would have to collect there for this challenge so you don't have to.
A Song of Ice and Fire - 19 Gold Dragons and 1 Copper Star or 39 Hands
Albion Online - 4,752,500 Gold
Among Us - 250,000 Stars
Animal Crossing - 2,625,000 Bells
Animal Jam - 69,833 Diamonds
Animal Jam - 2,688,173 Sapphires
Apex Legends - 2,500,000 Apex Coins
Arcaea - 2,550,000 Memories
Archage Unchained - 125,000,000 Coins
Arknights - 30,000 Originium
Ashes of Creation - 3,376,000 Embers
Astroneer - 2,500,000 QBits
Avatar - 166,666.67 Yuan
Azur Lane - 1,531,440 Gems
Baldi's Basics in Education and Learning - 2,500,000 You Thought Points
Banjo-Kazooie - 900 Musical Notes
BattleTech - 2,500 C-Bills
Be Funny Now! - 2,625,000 Gems
Bioshock Infinite - 715 Silver Eagles
Bloons Monkey City - 1,250,000 Bloonstones
Bloons TD Battles - 625,000 Medallions
Bloons TD Battles 2 - 13,000,000 Monkey Money
Bloons Tower Defense 5 - 19,318,182 Monkey Money
Bloons Tower Defense 5 - 150,000 Tokens
Bloons Tower Defense 6 - 17,500,000 Monkey Money
Boomlings - 93,750,000 Gold
Brawl Stars - 425,000 Gems
Call of Duty - 2,500,000 Points
Candy Crush Saga - 250,000 Gold Bars
Change - finish the game
Chronicles of Riddick - 150,000 UD
Clash of Clans - 2,500,000 Gems
Clash Royale - 2,500,000 Gems
Cookie Clicker - 300,000 Cookies
Cookie Run Kingdom - 2,500,000 Crystals
Cowboy Bebop - 13,461,539 Woolongs
Cyberpunk - 11,208,707,759 Eurodollars
Dead by Daylight - 2,500,000 Auric Cells
Demolition Man - 25 Credits
DemonCrawl - 3,125,000 Tokens
Destiny 2 - 2,500,000 Silver
Disco Zoo - 375,000 DiscoBux
Discworld - 150.00 Ankh-Morpork Dollar or 40,000 Crowns
Disney Ducks Comic Universe
Volcano Valley - 2,500,000,000 Volcanovian Pezozies
Donald Duck - 1,250 Bajillion Pecos
Diablo Immortal - 1,800,180 Eternal Orbs
Disney Emoji Blitz - 219,298,000 Coins or 1,315,780 Gems
Doctor Who - 784,094 Credits
Donkey Kong - 999 Banana Coins
Down and Out in the Magic Kingdom - 83,334 Whuffie
Dragon Mania Legends - 28,470,070,000 Gold or 950,060 Gems
Dragonball Z - 50,000 Zeni
DragonVale - 500 Trunks, 1 Bag, and 1 Pile
Dune - 15,254 Solari
Dungeons and Dragons - 198 Platinum Pieces, 4 Gold Pieces, 1 Silver Piece, and 3 Copper Pieces
Dys4ia - finish the game
Egg Inc. - 17,000,000 Golden Eggs
Elite Dangerous - 31,250,000 ARX
Exoracer - 400,000 Diamonds
Fallen London - 140,000 Fate
Fallout - 1,605 Bottle Caps
Fate/Grand Order - 42,709 Saint Quartz
Felix the Cat - 12,500,000,000,000 Bakshee
Final Fantasy VII - 1,366,121 Gil
Fishing Planet - 194,159,000 Credits or 1,941,590 Baitcoins
Fortnite - 3,125,000 V-Bucks
Gaia Online - 2,500,000 Gaia Cash or 125,000,000,000,000 Gold or 12,500,000 Platinum or 125,000 Flynn's Booties
Game of Thrones - 25 Gold Dragons
Genshin Impact - 1,500,000 Genesis Crystals
Going Under - 10,000,000,000 Styxcoin
Gorilla Tag - 5,000,000 Shiny Rocks
Growtopia - 875,000,000 Gems
Guardians of the Galaxy - 10,715 Units
Guild Wars 2 - 2,000,000 Gems
GURPS - 140,108,846 Gold, 19 Silver, and 13 Copper
Halo - 57,073.82 Credits
Harry Potter - 3,401 Galleons, 6 Sickles, and 4 Knuts
Hatsune Miku: Colorful Stage - 2,916,667 Crystals
High Frontier 4 All - 1 Aqua
HoboWars - 25,000 Points
Home: Adventures with Tip & Oh - 50,283,334 Gleeblos
Honkai: Star Rail - 1,620,180 Stellar Jades or 1,620,180 Oneiric Shards
Hunter × Hunter - 2,916,667 Jenny
Hypixel - 3,375,000 SkyBlock Gems or 2,500,000 Gold or 31,250 Loot Chests
In Time - 3.259 average Gregorian years
Is It Wrong to Try to Pick Up Girls in a Dungeon? - 2,625,000 Vals
Jacksfilms - 138,889 YIAY Tokens
Jetpack Joyride - 250,000,000 Coins
Juego de Tronos - 8,966,966 Gold, 43 Silver, and 1 Copper
Kamen Rider Build - 25,000 Dollark
Keeper of the Lost Cities - 1 Luster
Kingdom Hearts - 18,797 Munny
Kingdom of Loathing - 2,500 Mr. Accessories
Kirby series - 3,125,600 Gem Apples
League of Legends - 3,250,000 Riot Points
LEGO series - 32 Studs
Limbus Company - 1,750,000 Lunacy
Lord of the Rings Online - 2,875,600 LOTRO Points or 359,425 Mithril Coins
Magikarp Jump - 1,250,000 Diamonds
Mario series
exact price - 277,778 Mushroom Coins or 277,778 Koopabits
Dr. Mario World - 277,778 Mushroom Coins or 375,000 Diamonds
Super Mario 3D World - 👑👑👑 Lives and 99 Mushroom Coins
3D Mario games - 99 Lives and 49 Mushroom Coins
2D Mario games - 99 Lives and 99 Mushroom Coins
Super Mario Odyssey - 9,999 Mushroom Coins
Super Mario Land 2 - 999 Mushroom Coins
Bowser's Fury - 99 Mushroom Coins
Mario & Luigi: Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga - play until the part where you win the bet against Prince Peasley
Mario Kart Tour - 37,500 Rubies
Mass Effect - 156250 Credits
Merge Dragons - 625,000 Dragon Gems
Minecraft - 64 Emeralds
Minecraft: Bedrock Edition - 4,250,000 Minecoins
Monster Hunter - 2,625,000 Zeni
Monster Legends - 325,000 Gems
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic - 2,500 Bits
My Singing Monsters - 500,000 Diamonds
Narnia - 100,000 Lions
Neko Atsume - 1,875,000 Gold Fish
Neopets - 2,500,000 Neocash
New World - 25,000,000 Gold Coins
Nineteen Eighty Four - 25,000.00 Oceanian Dollars
Ninja Kiwi - 625,000 NK Coins
Naruto - 262,500 Ryō
Odd Squad - 25,000 Jackalope Dollars
One Piece - 2,625,000 Belly or 26,250,000,000 Extol
Path of Exile - 6,250,000 Chaos Orbs or 100,000 Exalted Orbs
Pixel Gun 3D - 750,000 Gems
Plants vs. Zombies 2 - 50,000,000 Coins or 250,000 Gems
Pluto Nash - 3 Hillaries
Pocket Trains - 3,000,000 Bux
Pokémon series - 999,999 Pokédollars
Pokémon Go - 1,718,750 Pokécoins
Pokémon Sword and Shield - 175,000 Watts
Pokémon UNITE - 1,531,250 Aeos Gems
Progressbar95 - 125,000 Product Keys
Ratchet & Clank - 38,462 Metal Bolts
Rebuild World - 2,625,000 Aurum
Red Dwarf - 1,308 Dollar Pounds and 25 Pennycents
Rick and Morty - 125,000 Flurbos
Roblox - 2,000,000 Robux
Rocket League - 2,500,000 Credits
Roma - 1,685,519,963 Denarius and 4 Sesterius
Sea of Thieves - 2,291,667 Ancient Coins
Second Life - 8,000,000 Linden Dollars
Shadowrun - 11,208,707,759 Nuyen or 33,626,123,276 Rubles
Slow Life in Another World (I Wish!) - 2,625,000 Nohl
Snow White with the Red Hair - 2,625,000 Dill
Sonic series - 4,556,386 Rings
Sonic Forces: Speed Battle - 2,500,000 Red Star Rings
Spaceballs - 82,667 Space Bucks
Sprawl Trilogy - 1,086,957 New Yen
Spy X Family - 8,203 Dalc and 13 Ostanian Pents
Spyro - 166,667 Gems
Star Trek - 516,235 Federation Credits or 250,000 Darsek
Star Trek (Mari) - 675,676 Renn
Star Trek (United Federation of Planets) - 12,500 Federation Credits
Star Trek: The Next Generation - 15 Bars of Gold-pressed Latinum, 15 Strips, and 6 Slips
Star Wars - 500,000 Galactic Credit Standards
Stardew Valley - 500g
Stormbringer - 186,811,795 Gold, 9 Silver, and 8 Copper
Street Fighter - 3,137 Bison Dollars
Subway Surfers - 225,000,000 Coins or 125,000 Keys
Sword Art Online: Gun Gale Online - 262,500,000 Credits
Team Fortress 2 - 10,000 Keys
Temple Run - 250,000,000 Coins
Terraria - 2 Silver Coins
The Ballad of Rika Strong-Arm - 148 Gold Pieces
The Battle Cats - 750,000 Cat Food
The Binding of Isaac - impossible because you can only hold 99¢
The Elder Scrolls - 11,004 Septim
The Flintstones - 7,813 Clams
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - 428,572 Altarian dollars
The Impossible Game 2 - 2,000,000 Blocks
The Number of the Beast - 25 New Dollars
The Office - 250,000,000 Schrute Bucks
The Sims - 19,380 Simoleons
The Witcher - 83,334 Crowns or 63,452 Orens
Tiny Tower - 7,500,000 Bux
Touhou LostWord - 760,000 God Crystals
Trigun - 90,580 Double Dollars
Truxton King - 17,858 Gavvo
War Robots - 3,000,000 Gold
Warframe - 375,000 Platinum
What Mad Universe - 250,000 Credits
Who Framed Roger Rabbit - 2,808,989 Simoleons
World Flipper - 1,000,000 Lodestar Beads
World of Tanks and World of Warplanes - 3,418,997,741,500 Gold
World of Warcraft Classic - 2,375,000 Gold
World of Warcraft The Burning Crusade - 3,500,000 Gold Coins
World of Warships - 9,375,000,000 Credits or 6,250,000 Doubloons
Zelda - 999 Rupees
The values are not guaranteed to be accurate. In fact, I have found many cases of contradictory information on the internet. But you don't care about that anyway, do you? This isn't about the exact value anyway. These are all meant to be rough estimates to give you a sense of scale.

The Motivation

I was inspired by my Pokémon Trans Ally challenge that is about collecting money for a trans person's surgery. If you actually attempt this challenge you'll see that it'll usually be a very long and tedious challenge that will require a lot of experimentation, long-term planning, and doing the same things over and over again for a very long time, especially if you wanna try this as a speedrun. If the challenge bores you out, well, that is the point! The challenge is meant to give people with little or no sense of money an impression of how much money this really is! Now, you could argue that this challenge could theoretically be used to visualize any amount of money, and you would technically be correct, but I still think that a transgender transition is one of the best matches for this challenge because:

1. A transition is always only for one person. We aren't talking about a company buying another company or a country investing in more infrastructure. This is something within the realm of a single person so it makes sense to have this be a challenge for a single person or a small group.
2. This is not a luxury item like a famous painting or a private jet. Overwhelming scientific evidence proves that this is a medical necessity that trans people require in order to live like the majority of people. It is not something you want but something you need. So you can really say that acquiring all this money is really something that they have to go through. Therefore, unless you are transgender yourself, I would really recommend you to actually play the challenge until the end, even if it takes you years to actually do so. Not for your enjoyment but to acknowledge trans people's struggles and maybe also to protest against the gatekeeping system.
3. Unlike people who regularly need medications, the transgender transition is a once-in-a-lifetime thing and is therefore compatible with a challenge that you only play through once and then never again.
4. Once your transition is over, it cannot be taken from you.
5. It is not possible to request the costs to be paid for you if you can prove that you cannot afford it, meaning the only way to get it is to actually get the money.
6. Being trans is not an illness or a disability. Trans people never did anything wrong, neither deliberately nor accidentally. They are simply born with a condition that requires them to get the money. Trans people are therefore as guilt-free as a typical videogame hero.

Do you know anything more expensive that fulfills all those criteria?

The Fun Facts

• If you collect 1,000,000 coins in Super Mario Bros. 2, you win a golden Mario statue. This is actually more money than required for the trans ally challenge!
• If payment by installments were supported by this challenge then the most cumbersome game to do this challenge in would be The Binding of Isaac, because that would require you to send at least 25,253 installments. You would have to max out your money counter every 10¾ hours on average.
• You immediately win the challenge if you try it on a game where the money you start with is already high enough. For example, in the game The Roll Ahead, you play as either Bill Gates or Steve Jobs and you start out with 35 Billion.
• In the game Anti-Monopoly, you win by losing your money. However, if you try this challenge in this game, you'll still have to gain money. This is kinda the opposite of a coinless challenge because where a coinless challenge makes positive money negative, this challenge makes negative money positive.
• Characters like the monk from Crypt of the NecroDancer, Entity from depict1, and Default Dan from Default Dan die upon touching money. Kinda makes you think, doesn't it?
• The purple coins in the Super Mario Galaxy series, the Butz in Kappa Mikey, the Glotkies in Taxi, the coins in Syobon Action, and the Rasbukniks in Li'l Abner are worth nothing.
• If World of Anime Babes was a real game then this challenge would require 1,250,000,000 tokens. As the narrator said: "Big numbers are better, right?" One way to get this money would be by selling like 1,000 in-game outfits.
• If you are playing a game taking place in the medieval time, the challenge would require you to get 411¼ medieval pennies.
• If you wanna make the monetary values more immersive, you can look at how they are depicted in the menu of microtransactions. For example, Clash of Clans groups predefined values of gems into bags, sacks, boxes, and chests that therefore represent specific amounts of gems and could therefore be regarded as higher currency units. For example, 2,500,000 gems fit into 179 chests. Sure, this won't help you with strategizing, but it will certainly make it more interesting for your audience!
• According to this article, this challenge would require you to get 129,058,751 Simeons. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to determine which franchise Simeons are from.
• The Ztars from Mario Party and the Rupoors from The Legend of Zelda are currencies that actually take money away from you, making their exchange rates negative!
• If Terrance & Phillip: Give Us Your Money was a real game then this challenge would require 10,204,200 Canadian Coins. This value was calculated under the assumption that everyone would realize that the cheapest deal is actually the best deal. One way to get this money would be by not playing the game 2,041 times. Oh good, you're already on it. But will you make it within the time limit?
• The values of LEGO Studs were calculated using the value of a human life. If you applied this logic to every game with currency units that are worth ¹⁄₁₀₀ life each then a single one of those currency units would already be enough to win this challenge and if you applied this logic to every game where 10,000 points give you an extra life then this challenge would require you to earn 32 points, but only if there isn't already an in-game currency.
• The fictional currency with the highest inflation rate I could find was in Elbonia, the rate being 1,000,000,000% daily. Despite the high time limit, I would recommend you to hurry with getting enough money there if you even can.
• The average age at the time the RTS Rise of Nations takes place in was roughly 31 years, which would reduce this challenge's time limit to 27 in-game years at most. Which would be about 2.08 real-time seconds according to estimations made by PeanutButterGamer, according to which the time limit for Diablo would be 6 in-game years and the challenge would be impossible for SimAnt.
• For obvious reasons, a society can only survive if its maximum lifespan is at least the minimum age of fertility. Due to precocious puberty, the world records for the youngest biological parents are 9 years for microgametic parents and 5 years and 7 months for macrogametic parents, meaning that the maximum lifespan of any human society must always be at least 9 years. Since 9 years are more than 4 years, it therefore follows that transgender healthcare benefits all possible human societies. Remember this if you ever attempt this challenge on a game that takes place in a society where these values are different for whatever reason, like a society of anthropomorphic animals for example.
• If the average lifespan was less than 4 years then the average lifespan of a trans person would actually be higher than the average lifespan as a whole. This is because trans people who die before the age of 4 would not be included in the statistic, due to being undetectable. If that happens, you'll have to recalculate what the statistic would be.
• Transgender surgery is older than the discovery of Pluto, modern toilet paper, chicken tikka masala, duct tape, ballpoint pens, ciabatta bread, Velcro, and Tupperware.
• The Wumpa Fruit from Crash Bandicoot are also a form of currency, as was revealed in some games. A Wumpa Fruit is worth exactly the same as a piece of gold in Skylanders. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to find out what either of those are worth.
• The most valuable fictional currency that I could find was the Aqua from High Frontier 4 All, which is estimated to be a three-digit million $ amount.
• Team Kirby Clash Deluxe and Super Kirby Clash value Gem Apples differently. I based their value on Super Kirby Clash because Team Kirby Crash Deluxe only lets you purchase a maximum of 3,000 Gem Apples, meaning that Super Kirby Clash would be more practical for purchases over $29.85. Noone would accept a payment of 838 installments if a more practical way of payment is possible.
• This challenge would require 2,500,000 Nuggets in the game PokéHeroes but I didn't add it to the list because it's a fangame and I didn't wanna confuse.

---
/uj If you donate gold in Gaia Online, the company will donate money to charity. I find this mechanic to be a really good idea and I would like to see it more often because it enables players to support the less fortunate without having to donate their own money. Just imagine if every game on this list gave you the option to donate $25,000 worth of in-game money which would then be donated to transgender causes and unlock the Trans Ally achievement! I know it would be very cumbersome to unlock, but completionists would definitely go for it and also, it would be done for a good cause!
---
/rj Did you know you can make it so that every time an amount of money is shown, its value is converted into transgender transitions?
Simply get Universal Automatic Currency Converter, then scroll down to Custom display and enter the following:
Use custom display: ☑
Custom display: ¤ 🏳️‍⚧️
Custom conversion rate: 0.00004
---
/uj The original post was removed by Reddit's spam filters so I uploaded it again without the links in the list. The original list with the links in them will be in the comments.

[First.] (Chapters 1-2) [Prev.] (Chapters 3-4) [Next.] (Chapters 7-8)
​

Chapter 5:
FALLING LIKE DOMINOS
^{They’ve got the moves!}

Like a cackle of hyenas, the peaceful silence of the desert was broken by the despotic laughter of raiders (the ‘Rust Fiendz’ as they like to call themselves) riding in the night, their vehicles kicking up a large cloud of sand in their wake, and the smell of motor oil, sulfur, iron, and death tailing them as they drove off from one of their latest hits.
In the cabins of each rusted-to-hell pile of scrap on wheels, their jury-rigged radio crackles to life. The constant whine of static and electrical buzzing is punched through by a haughty voice. “Hey good shit back there, boys!” the gruff voice barks. Over the din of motors and engines, the roar of various vehicles’ occupants punches through, their raucous cheers just as vicious and loud as their dilapidated chariots. At the head of the pack of these rusted raiders was a heavily modified pickup truck that looked more akin to a sheet-metal sarcophagus that crashed through a hot-topic, a fitting final resting place for their war chief.
“Shit,” he snickers to himself, reveling in his recently ill-gotten spoils as he plunges a hand through a roughly made sack made out of a mysterious hide; whether it’s human or an animal remains a mystery. “Dumbass motherfuckers. Why do these starry-eyed jackasses keep trying?” He pulls out a bottle of spirits, the label reading: ‘Whiskey Rose brewery--A Cassidy Venture.’ Rolling down the window, he breaks the top of the bottle like the fucking barbarian he is and downs the bottle. “Whatever, not so starry-eyed anymore,” he snickers to himself, recounting the way his latest victim’s eyes clouded as she lay bleeding on the half-built foundation of the colony’s brewing facility. “As long as the hive lords keep paying, there’s no need for me to ask questions. ‘Sides these colony upstarts need a fucking reality check anyways.” Tossing the bottle out the window and rolling it up, he stops midway and watches through the rear-view mirror as the empty glass bottle collides in the face of one the scouts. The man lets out a high-pitched yelp as he goes tumbling off his motorcycle and is quickly crushed under the wheels of the others. “Hey dipshits look out next time!” he shouts out as he finishes rolling up the window. Without another look back the war chief focuses on the sands in front of him, not bothering to notice the smaller cloud of sand blending in behind the group.
-------------
“C’mon, come on!” Carmine hisses through gritted teeth. He lets go of the wheel, allowing the cruise control to stay on the path towards their target as he checks the chamber of his pistol. Meanwhile, Victor preemptively loads the makeshift crossbow with a tracker bolt, and Devin pulls back the bolt of the machine gun and begins assessing priority targets. “Devin!”
“Yeh chief? Devin answers back.
“I want a spotter report before we get any closer!”
“On it buddy!” With that, Devin pulls out a periscope and uses it to peek over without exposing himself from the safety of the gunner’s nest confines. He catches a glimpse of some poor bastard falling out into the desert sands and promptly being turned into a fine human pâté under the wheels of his fellow raiders. Devin winces at the sight but then smiles rather smugly. “Well, that’s one to scratch off the list. Fucker probably deserved it,” he mutters to himself. “Oi Carmine good news!”
“What is it?”
“Is god gonna smite them for us?” Victor interjects.
Devin shakes his head for no one to see. “Nah, I fucking wish. We were going to be dealing with eight scouts, six technicals, and king mong over there. However, it seems that we can scratch off a scout, cause the dumbass somehow managed to fall off his bike.”
Victor sucks air through his teeth at the news. “Bitch got smeared across the sand by his own buddies. Sucks to be that loser.”
Carmine snorts and chuckles to himself. “Bitch deserved it. Hey Devin, soon as a bunch of them group up give ‘em a taste of the beans. Save the actual HE round for king doitch bag over there.”
“Got it.” There’s a pregnant pause between all three of them as they see three of the scouts and a technical start slowing down from the main group and approaching them. “Oh shit, here comes a gaggle of them now.” Wordlessly, the trio goes to meet them, each of them readying themselves for the fight ahead. “Hey, Carmine, blast the radio; It’ll make us aim better.”
“Whose playlist is on right now?”
Victor rolls down the window and props himself out with his assault rifle at the ready. “Don’t know. It’s either yours, Devin’s, or any one of our granddad’s playlist. We all know that all your grandad listened to was ‘fortunate son’!”
“Oh, fuck off Victor!”
“The joke will never die! Besides, at least your grandad was different. Devin and my grandpa were practically the same person, they even had an on-going list on all the same ideas they had and even the same things they said... Well, what are you waiting for? Play that shit!” Victor shouts over the wind rushing past.
“They were brothers all the same, just as we are now!” Carmine shouts back. “Alright, playing that shit!” Carmine jams a finger into one of the old, faded buttons of the decrepit radio. It takes a moment before it comes to life. The static fading away until suddenly crisp, clear, energetic music starts blasting from the speakers, and the trio are greeted with the steady beat of a tambourine. “Fuck! Could be any one of ours!” Carmine shouts over as a guitar joins in on the fun, followed by drums hot on its tail.
​

All the old paintings on the tombs
They do the sand dance don’t you know?
If they move too quick. (Oh Whey oh!)

​
“Bitching!” Devin shouts, loading in one of the makeshift rounds for the grenade launcher.
-------------
Three scouts, having watched one of their own get crushed under the wheels of their fellow Rust Fiendz, group up together and begin to slow down to lag behind the rest of the pack, not wanting to take the chance of watering the sand in their own blood and viscera due to others’ disregard of life.
“Hey!” One of them shouts, getting the attention of the others. “Who the hell are those jobbers tailing us?”
“’ow the fack should I know?” One of them barks back.
“Well figure it the fuck out because they don’t look like one of ours. Their ride looks too clean and purdy to be one of us. You!” He points to the third, “Go flag one of the more sober guys up there and tell him to back us up.”
“Wait. What the hell why me dipshit?!” He protests.
“Because I said so fuckwad. Unless you want to be fly food smeared across the sand, I suggest you do it.” The third scout relents and goes to one of the technicals up ahead to request help. “Good, we have a new pecking order established now.”
The second scout looks at the self-appointed head incredulously. “The ‘ell there is! I never ‘oted yew to be boss of the scouts!”
“Your fault for not stepping up. Now shut up. From what happened up ahead I don’t think the boss wants anyone bothering him and those party crashers are getting closer. Get ready and bitch boy and motor cuck are coming over to back us up.” The self-appointed head turns around heads off for the armored car coming up on their rear.
“Mutha fucka!” the second bitterly swears. “The ‘ell is that music anyways?”
-------------
Devin stands up and positions himself over the gunner’s nest, eagerly bobbing his head along with the music as he leads the shot on the approaching raiders. Carmine for his part begins steadily speeding up to meet them.
“I’m gonna show these fuckers what real desert heat is!” Victor excitedly shouts over the music. He racks the bolt on the assault rifle and begins taking aim himself.
​

All the bazaar men by the Nile
They got the money on a bet
Gold crocodiles (Oh whey oh)
They snap their teeth on your cigarette.

​
The music starts ramping up now as Carmine floors the gas causing the RPM to sharply rise to the redline and all the men begin harmonizing with music.
​

Foreign types with the hookah pipes say

​
“WHHHEEYYY OOHHH WHHEEY OH, AAAYYY OOHH WHHEEYY OOHH!” They sing together.
​

Walk like an Egyptian...

​
And like that the music dies down for a moment leaving only the strumming of the electric guitar and the methodical shaking of the tambourines. Everyone holds their breath while they focus on the four hostiles coming at them head on. Each one of the men’s eyes dilating like a cat’s, just waiting for the moment to pounce.
...
...
“Closer.” All that’s left is the tambourine, it’s rhythm in sync with the beating of their hearts in their eardrums.
...
...
“Closer.” They all think to themselves, their adrenaline and testosterone building up in anticipation. The guitars make their presence known drowning out the noisy racket of the raiders. Tensions continue to rise until suddenly!
Dun dododo dun dun
Dun dododo dun DUN
DUN DODODO DUN *THOONK\*
Devin fires the grenade launcher, and shots begin to ring out alongside the strums of the guitar. As if on cue, the singer returns, her voice coming in right on time as the bean can explodes, sending bits of tin and whatever else they could stuff in there as makeshift shrapnel, taking out the scouts and flipping over the technical on its side like a wounded ox.
​

The blonde waitresses take their trays
They spin around and they cross the floor
They’ve got the moves! (OOHHH WHHEEEYY OOHHH!)
You drop your drink, then they bring you more!

​
-------------
The sudden shots and the explosion bring the rest of the raiders out of their revelry as each and every one of them sobers up and checks their rear-view mirrors. They watch in surprise as one of their own is flipped onto its side by an unknown assailant. None of them are able to get a good look until the cloud of smoke passes and an armored car in better conditions than theirs rides up to the flipped technical and throws a firebomb onto it, followed by a staccato of gunfire from someone leaning out the passenger side window with nonsensical music playing.
You drop your drink, then they bring you more!
(That drink being the firebomb that was force fed into that poor fucker.)
There is a collective moment of “Oh Shit” between the Rust Fiendz as the single communal braincell bounces in out of the skulls of all the members. Some of them panic, while the drunker ones, angered by this party crasher, make a sloppy U-turn and go to face this suicidal nimrod head-on.
-------------
Carmine pounds the wheel and shouts, “FUCK YEAH GUYS! GOOD SHIT RIGHT THERE!”
“Hell yeah brother!” Victor shouts, all the while Devin begins cackling like a madman over the destruction they had caused. Devin’s cackling is quickly cut short as he hears the pained groans of a poor, unfortunate scout that was badly maimed by the dollar store dumpster frag. Nonchalantly, he brings out his carbine and double taps the raider for good measure and goes back to cackling.
​

All the kids so sick of books
They like the punk and the metal band

​
A honk from the horn cuts Devin and Victor’s celebration short as they see two more technicals and the last of the scouts coming their way.
​

When the buzzer rings (OOHH WWHHEEYY OOHH!)
They’re walking like an Egyptian

​
“That’s our cue guys, get ready!” Carmine calls out.
Devin fires another shot of the grenade launcher at the oncoming enemies, but the effect isn’t as spectacular as last time as the makeshift bean can round manages to dent one of the technicals but bounces off the hood and into the sand. “Fuck a dud!” Devin curses.
“Get on the turret and start blasting Devin!”
“Orders received!” Devin ducks back into the safety of the gunner’s nest right on time too as wild and erratic shots ping off of it. Before he can rack the bolt and begin firing, a thunderous blast disorients him and knocks him against the walls as the whole armored car shakes and sand rains down from above him. Drunkenly, he rubs the back of his head but is caught off guard by his helmet getting away. “Da fuckz wah that?” he slurred out.
Victor ducks down as bullets rattle on the hood of the car and junk rounds begin ricocheting off the armored grill covering the windshield, some of them managing to thread the needle and lodge themselves in the damaged bulletproof glass. “An explosion dipshit. Now-,” Victor covers his head and blind fires out the window towards the oncoming raiders. “GET ON THE FUCKING GUN!” he hurriedly shouts.
“Son of a-bitch goddamn mother *rrghh\*” Devin growls. Shaking his head and racking the bolt of the heavily bubba’ed FAL, he grits his teeth and takes aim. As the scouts get closer, they notice the gunner’s nest moving and begin concentrating their fire on the turret and spreading out. The sudden spray of bullets causes Devin to flinch and wince at the sparks and sharp sounds of scrap bullets on metal, but he clenches his jaw and fires an unfocused burst at one of the scouts. Devin’s shots go wide as Carmine begins speeding ahead and whipping the car violently left and right, either to try and ram some of the scouts or to throw off the aim of the technical firing the explosives.
​

All the kids in the marketplace say
(WHEEY OHH WHHEEYYY OOHH, AAYY OH WHEY OH!)
Walk like an Egyptian...

​
The music is abruptly cut off as another explosion rocks the speeding armored car and the radio cuts off. “FUCK DUDE!” Carmine shouts out.
“What. What! WHAT!” Victor rushes out, dipping back in from the passenger window and narrowly avoiding a spray of bullets from a scout coming up on their rear.
Before Carmine could get out a sentence one of the technicals that had been acting as cover for the other slows down and positions itself on Carmine’s side. Several shots ring out and manage to get through the grate that acted as armor for the driver side window. Victor watches on in horror as three heavy *THUNKS\* can be heard following by Carmine groaning and buckling. Carmine’s head slams on the wheel violently and he ends up honking the horn before snapping back up and firing his pistol at the offending technical.
“ASSHOLES!” Carmine curses. “Devin light those fuckers up on our right!” A violent rhythmic roar can be heard above them as Devin sprays the machine gun with extreme discrimination at the flanking technical. The screams of the raiders are drowned out by the gunfire before their vehicle begins to slow down and all noise from the raider’s Humvee ceases, all except a pitiful mechanical sputtering. The spraying resumes as Devin now has a clear shot on the technical that had been launching the explosives at them. The Rusted Sedan tries to bob and weave out of the shots until something explodes in the back and the car cartoonishly bounces on the sand.
“Fuck,” Devin heavily breathes out. Checking the scuffed belt feeding ammunition into the machine gun, he grimaces at the count and shakes his head. “Eighty-four rounds left. Fuck eighty-four rounds left,” he repeats to himself. “Well let’s see if I can’t rat my out of this one!” Cautiously he peeks his head out from the nest and sees two scouts behind the car taking pot shots at the rear-view window. Thankfully Carmine had the foresight to mount his ballistic shield to the back, but how long it’d hold was the question that worried Devin the most. “Hey, Carmine!”
“Urgh! Ah-Y-yeah Devin?”
“I need you to start doing some shit!”
“What kind of shit!” Carmine takes another shot to the side of his enclosed helmet and one to the side of his chest plate, the bullets not getting through but still managing to cause him to flinch and bruise from the force. He snaps his head to the scout, and the scout, now realizing how much she fucked up begins clutching the break of her ATV. Her ATV doesn’t slow down in time as Carmine fires three shots at her. One of the shots goes wide and misses, the second grazes her arm, but the third pierces her throat. She clutches at her throat with one and falls backward, one hand still death gripping the brake, the uneven steering and the violent braking causes the ATV to flip.
“I need you start swerving around and make these bastards on our tail get closer so I can nail them with the last bean can!”
Victor fires another burst taking out a scout that had been harassing the passenger side of the car. Overhearing the conversation, he taps Carmine’s sides and gets his attention. “Or what we could do. Hey Devin, how close are they!”
“They’re pretty close Victor!”
“How close?”
“About mouth to exhaust pipe distance! Why?” The realization dawns on Devin as he ducks back down to avoid the shots and he promptly gets back on the turret and focuses on ahead.
“Okay, thank you!” Turning his attention back to Carmine, Victor says, “Slam the brakes, this is going to be funny.”
“Oh, fuck yeah!” Carmine laughs out. Carmine abruptly slams on the brakes of the car, it takes a moment as the wheels fail to find traction on the sand, but it isn’t too long as a violent crash and shake of the car tells them as much. “Shit, one of them had a brain cell to rub between their fingers.” Luckily fortune was on their side as the sudden jolt from one of the scouts crashing into them managed to jolt the radio back to life. Unfortunately, though, one of the scouts speeds past them.
The trio lets out an elated cry as the music comes back on, but the elation is short lived as a frustrated shout from Devin alerts them to some unfortunate news. “Fuck he’s getting away and the rest of those braindead barbarians are heading into that sandstorm!”
Carmine steps on the gas and starts chasing after him and Victor leans out the window and takes aim with the crossbow. “Yeah, no we don’t do that here,” Victor states matter-of-factly. “Carmine step on it I want to make sure I land this.”
Carmine nods and tightens his grip on the wheel as the RPM hits the redline once more. “Alright hold on!”
The last scout looks behind himself as the sound of death rumbles like an engine getting pushed to its limits. Seeing how quickly the armored car is gaining on him, he hunches over and begins silently praying for mercy. His prayers are cut short as he feels a sharp pain pierce through his lower back, and he begins swerving wildly into the sandstorm, following the taillights and silhouettes of the other technicals as best he can through the storm.
Victor brings out a tracker and begins monitoring the tracker bolt. “And now we follow him through the storm.”
Devin hunkers down and suddenly jolts, a new fun idea pops up in his head. “Hey Carmine, pause the music. We’re going to be making an entrance!”
-------------
In the middle of the sandstorm the Rust Fiendz bicker and panic amongst themselves through their radios.
“Who the fuck were those guys?!”
“How the hell am I supposed to know!”
“Are you retarded! The Hive lords probably had enough of our shit. They sent someone to kill us!”
“We’re all going to di-“
“SHUT THE FUCK YOU WASTERS AND LISTEN HERE!” Their warchief screams over the radio, the sheer volume of causing the sound quality to warp and distort the audio of their poorly maintained radios. “We probably lost those jackasses in the storm by now, just keep driving. Furiosa!” He calls out.
“Furiosa you useless bitch! Answer me!” he angrily shouts again through the radio.
A calm voice, much too calm and collected to be a raider answers him back, “We’re almost out of the storm boss. It won’t be too long now.”
The warchief throws up a hand in exasperation. “Now you fucking answer.”
“Apologies sir, I was focusing.” She replies, her voice showing no hint of emotion.
“Yeah, well next time do it quicker.”
“Yes sir.”
The Rust Fiendz keep a tight formation as they follow Furiosa’s dune buggy as it takes the lead and guides them out of the storm. Once they’re out of the storm, Furiosa circles around and parks next to the Warchief’s pickup truck. Her vehicle compared to the rest of the group is well maintained with only light rusting here and there.
“Wait holy shit! The hell is that coming at us!” One of the raiders shout out over the radio.
Everyone draws their respective firearms and aims it at the red blinking light coming at them from the depths of the sandstorm. The air is suffocating now as the red gets closer and closer; it’s blinking becoming more rapid and it’s light brighter and brighter. All of them tense up as they hear an engine’s rumble get closer until suddenly something bursts out from the storm and everyone begins indiscriminately blasting at whatever had made the mistake of fucking with their crew.
The gun fire and shooting lasts for a good solid minute, the bullets kicking up sand, the muzzle flash lights the midnight sky and the smoke obscures everyone’s vision. Eventually the shots die down and so does the smoke revealing.
“H-Holy fuck!”
“You GODDAMN IDIOTS!” The Warchief shouts as everyone takes a good look at the swiss-cheesed remains of the last scout and the unidentifiable heap of scrap that was his vehicle. Before the Warchief could shout anymore abuse and obscenities at his band of idiots and jackasses.
Furiosa, the only competent member, says something over the radio. “Listen!” Everyone stops what they’re doing and does as she says. They listen intently and all they can hear is the rumble of their engines, the howling sandstorm and...
“Whistling?”
The whistling is distant, but overtime it gets louder and louder until they also hear the sounds of-
“Are those fucking guitars?”
“I hear a rattle...”
​

Slide your feet up the street, bend your back

​
“Is that singing?”
​

Shift your arm then you pull it back

​
Everyone’s collective blood runs cold as the familiar tune starts playing through the sandstorm and the sound of an engine gets louder and louder.
Life is hard don’t you know
And then once more silence.
...
...
...
“The fuck did it-“
For once in the Rust Fiendz collective lives, they did something in unison. They screamed as an armored car with people shouting-
​

"OOOOHHH WWHHHEEYYY OOOHHH!"

​
Landed on and crushed the occupants of a Cadillac, scratching another off their list of technicals.
​

SO STRIKE A POSE ON A CADILLAC

​

Chapter 6:
IN AN ESCAPE POD WONDERING IF THIS TRULY IS THE LAST
^{静けさが追いつめる}

“OH BY THE COMMON GOOD WHY! WHY! WHY!?” Cried Akali as one of the buttons he pressed only caused the escape pod to accelerate even faster. He clutched the sides of his head and began pacing in circles.
​
“How do I always get myself into these sorts of situations?!” he desperately shouted his hands grasping at the air, helplessly reaching out for something that wasn’t. He asked the question over and over again, but his desperate cries were answered only by the deafening roar of the escape pods thruster as it hurtled through space.

The escape pod blared.
“W-what is it now!” Quickly Akali rushed over to the main console of the escape pod to see what else the universe wanted to add to his woes. His eyes widened and all the feathers on his cobra-like hood flared out, a primordial fight or flight response to scare off predators or to make oneself blend better with shrubs and bushes to ambush prey. However, this response would do nothing as he couldn’t scare a console, nor were there any bushes to hide in from the decrepit satellites.



And like that hope was reignited in Akali as he frantically reached for the glove compartment, his hands fumbling the latch to open it. Each time it did his heart rate would spike until. “YES FINALLY!” He triumphantly shouted as he opened up the glove compartment. Instantly he looked down and all that met him was a pocket of darkness as black as the void around him as the glove compartment was empty. Save for a hastily written note that read.
The User Manual is currently being inspected by Health and Safety Specialist: Orza T’igalma. Please DO NOT use the Escape pod during this inspection period.
~Yours truly Cleaning and Maintenance Specialist ‘Gumpy’
P.S. Stop calling me a Janitor. I am a Cleaning and Maintenance Specialist dammit!
The light in Akali’s eyes faded out upon reading the note. His mind shutting off completely, tuning out the rattling and occasional impact that shook the escape pod as it barreled through the halo of space debris and satellites that surrounded the dead planet that the escape pod was on a hell-bent collision course towards. However, his mind was able to think of one thing; the crewmember he had encountered during his rush to get to his uncle, the various signs that got knocked out during his collision with said crewmember, and even the janitor’s scrubs that the crewmember wore. Then the pieces started fitting together; and he realized that one of those signs looked oddly like the one used for escape pods back on the station he was previously on.
The feathers on his hood spiked up as he let out a primal screech, “LORD GIVE ME ONE MORE CHANCE SO THAT I CAN MURDER THAT MANGY LO’HAAANNN!!”
-------------
Meanwhile on the Great Endeavor.
Several members of The Great Endeavor’s security team rushed to the escape pods; the order had just been given. It was a ‘Centauri protocol’ which called for the security team’s best equipment and their best members.
“What in Hel’s embrace?” One of the Vicaik members exclaimed.
“What?” One of them asked.
“Where the Hel are the signs?”
“What signs?”
“The signs.” The Vicaik stated again, pointing at the empty mounts and missing placards. The other members began looking around and sure enough, the signs were gone.
“It shouldn’t even matter. We know where they are,” One of the members said dismissively.
“I know that, but isn’t the captain’s nephew new?”
One of the crewmembers pauses at this and strokes their chin at the observation. “By about... a little less than a week why?”
...
...
The Vicaik slaps a heavy paw to their forehead. “Shit, that explains it!” He exclaims.
“Explains what?”
“He probably didn’t even memorize the layout! Also, that janitor probably screwed up some of the electrical systems while cleaning and probably shorted out some of the signs.”
“And?”
“You know what he always does. He always takes the damn signs to electrical to ‘have them fixed’. Before the Vicaik can elaborate more on the topic, an alert on their PDA’s draws their attention.

​
A.N: Hope you guys liked this chapter.
Also, Question: Should I make the chapters their own separate posts or should I keep doing what I'm doing now? Any other feedback, critiques, or criticisms are very much welcome.

Shapeshifting weapon guide

Everyone recognizes Windhammer as a good shapeshifting weapon, but did you know that an even better weapon drops in normal difficulty, or that Buriza is a viable alternative? If not then this is the guide for you! I've compared 600 configurations of weapons and made a list of the best options for shapeshifting druids and barbarians.

Shapeshifted attack speed

Attack speed is one of the few damage multipliers available for physical builds. In addition, attack speed plays a role in defense as it allows you to recover from hitstun and start leeching faster. While shapeshifted there are three parameters that determine your attack speed:

1. The werewolf weapon threshold (WWT) breakpoint
   
2. The weapon type
   
3. The total attack speed (TAS) breakpoint
   

WWT is influenced by the weapon speed modifier (WSM), which ranges from -20 to 20 for twohanded weapons, and the weapon IAS (wIAS). No other sources of IAS, through auras, skills or gear will change the maximum reachable attack speed. The WWT is simply calculated as: WWT = wIAS - WSM.
The WWT breakpoint in turn determines the highest reachable attack speed depending on the weapon type. Classes have different thresholds for different weapons. Druids are more proficient in twohanded polearms, maces and axes, and less proficient in twohanded swords and spears, while barbarians are most proficient in swords. For the same weapon type, if a weapon has a WSM of 20 (Thunder maul), it means it will always require 20% more wIAS to reach the same breakpoint as a weapon with a WSM of 0 (Ogre axe).
There may be several attack speed breakpoints for the same WWT, these are the TAS breakpoints. Note that the maximum speed is determined by the WWT itself, that is the fastest TAS breakpoint belonging to the particular WWT breakpoint. Effective IAS (EIAS), and skill IAS (SIAS) factor into TAS. The formula is: TAS = EIAS + SIAS - WSM. All of your combined attack speed from weapon and equipment go through diminishing returns to reach some EIAS. SIAS from skills, such as werewolf, and auras such as fanaticism are added directly without diminishing returns. For werewolf, the source of SIAS is very high, and together with the EIAS coming from the weapon you will almost always reach the highest TAS breakpoint. For werebear, which lacks SIAS, or for wolfbarbs which have a low level skill it may be useful to gain TAS from fanaticism on a merc, or to have some additional IAS from gear to reach the highest breakpoint. To learn more on attack speed breakpoints see the wiki. To calculate IAS breakpoints conveniently, use a calculator.
Breakpoints - Project Diablo 2
Path of Diablo Attack Speed Calculator

Ranking the best weapons

Each build gets two separate tier lists. The best list contains weapons that have the highest damage output. These weapons are ethereal, corrupted for 120 %ED / 20%IAS and puzzleboxed for maximum sockets. The budget list contains weapons that have only been corrupted for maximum sockets. All weapons are rolled at their maximum potential with regards to their %ED and +min/max damages. The best list continues until it reaches a weapon with a score that is less than the highest in the budget list.
(Note, although I call it a budget list since it's relatively easier to acquire, some of the weapons are expensive and can be very hard to find.)

• Avg shows the average damage of the weapon
  
• FPA shows the frames per attack. This is the maximum fpa that is achievable with the current runes, not necessarily the maximum achievable fpa with a different rune combination.
  

EDIT: The fury fpa's listed on the calculators are wrong. In PD2 fury attacks with 3 instead of 5 hits making the average attack speed slightly slower, the tables and spreadsheet now reflect this. Thanks to 2literpopcorn for pointing this out.
Note for werebear: This is the fastest breakpoint for this particular wIAS, but it may require fanaticism and/or additional IAS from gear to reach it

• Score is the effective dps, which is the product of the average damage and the attack speed, divided by 1000 and rounded for convenience. Since the game engine runs at 25 fps, the attack speed is calculated from the fpa as follows: attack speed = 25/fpa
  
• Runes show the particular rune combination to reach that weapon score
  

The ranking represent the maximum sheet dps, not necessarily the best weapons as there are other parameters to consider. You may want to use a different fpa breakpoint for playstyle, or defensive reasons, and you may want to consider weapons for their stats, proc effects and damage consistency. The desirable stats also depend on the shapeshifting form. Werewolves do not gain critical strike which makes deadly strike very desirable, whereas werebears and barbarians do gain critical strike naturally making deadly strike redundant. Werewolves attack several times with fury which gives a consistent damage output, whereas werebears may want a higher minimum damage to oneshot enemies and improve clearspeed. Whether you are mapping or bossing, you may prioritize certain proc effects or defensive stats.
Lastly, note that only Shael, Ohm and Zod runes were considered for sockets. There are more optimal combinations using 15/40 jewels.

The weapon spreadsheet

You can view and download the spreadsheet to look at all the possible combinations, and to filter the parameters according to your needs. I have included most unique and set twohanders with decent damage potentials and IAS, but not every possible item. The corrupt column means the weapon is corrupted (120%ED / 20% IAS). The eth column means the weapon is ethereal (1.25x damage bonus). The difficulty column is:

• 0 when it is non-ethereal and corrupted for max sockets
  
• 1 when it is ethereal and corrupted for max sockets or non-ethereal, ED/IAS corrupted and puzzleboxed for max sockets
  
• 2 when it is ethereal, ED/IAS corrupted and puzzleboxed for max sockets
  

Big thanks to BetweenWalls and korben66 for providing and testing the wolfbarb fury breakpoints!
View spreadsheet
Download spreadsheet

Fury best

Item	Avg	FPA	Score	Runes
Hellslayer	990	4.67	5.3	ShaelShaelOhmZod
Earth Shifter	939	5	4.7	ShaelShaelOhmZod
Steeldriver	906	5	4.5	ShaelShaelOhmZod
Tomb Reaver	844	4.67	4.5	ShaelOhmOhmZod
The Cranium Basher	820	4.67	4.4	ShaelShaelShaelZod
Odium	869	5	4.3	ShaelOhmOhmZod
Messerschmidt's Reaver	800	4.67	4.3	ShaelShaelOhmZod
Ribcracker	853	5	4.3	ShaelOhmZod
Bonehew	790	4.67	4.2	ShaelShaelOhmZod
Executioner's Justice	841	5	4.2	ShaelShaelOhmZod
Windhammer	777	4.67	4.2	ShaelShaelOhmZod
Warlord’s Trust	549	3.33	4.1	ShaelShaelShaelShael
Ethereal Edge	540	3.33	4	ShaelShaelShaelShael
Athena’s Wrath	772	5	3.9	OhmOhmOhmZod

Fury budget

Item	Avg	FPA	Score	Runes
Hellslayer	706	4.67	3.8	ShaelShaelShaelOhmOhm
Messerschmidt's Reaver	482	3.33	3.6	ShaelShaelShaelShaelShaelShael
Earth Shifter	712	5	3.6	ShaelShaelShaelOhmOhmOhm
Steeldriver	685	5	3.4	ShaelShaelShaelOhmOhmOhm
The Cranium Basher	621	4.67	3.3	ShaelShaelShaelShaelOhmOhm
Windhammer	433	3.33	3.2	ShaelShaelShaelShaelShaelShael
Executioner's Justice	638	5	3.2	ShaelShaelShaelOhmOhmOhm
Odium	613	5	3.1	ShaelShaelOhmOhmOhm
Buriza	406	3.33	3	ShaelShaelShaelShaelShaelShael
Athena’s Wrath	389	3.33	2.9	ShaelShaelShaelShaelShael

Maul best

Item	Avg	FPA	Score	Runes
Hellslayer	990	5	4.95	ShaelShaelOhmZod
Tomb Reaver	715	4	4.47	ShaelShaelShaelZod
Earth Shifter	865	5	4.32	ShaelShaelShaelZod
Athena's Wrath	665	4	4.16	ShaelShaelOhmZod
Steeldriver	831	5	4.16	ShaelShaelShaelZod
The Cranium Basher	821	5	4.1	ShaelShaelShaelZod
Warlord's Trust	653	4	4.08	ShaelShaelOhmOhm
Odium	805	5	4.02	ShaelShaelOhmZod
Messerschmidt's Reaver	800	5	4	ShaelShaelOhmZod
Ribcracker	640	4	4	ShaelShaelShael
Bonehew	790	5	3.95	ShaelShaelOhmZod
Windhammer	777	5	3.88	ShaelShaelOhmZod
Executioner's Justice	776	5	3.88	ShaelShaelShaelZod

Maul budget

Item	Avg	FPA	Score	Runes
Hellslayer	602	4	3.76	ShaelShaelShaelShaelShael
Earth Shifter	592	4	3.7	ShaelShaelShaelShaelShaelOhm
Steeldriver	565	4	3.53	ShaelShaelShaelShaelShaelOhm
Executioner's Justice	535	4	3.34	ShaelShaelShaelShaelShaelOhm
Messerschmidt's Reaver	525	4	3.28	ShaelShaelShaelShaelShaelOhm
The Cranium Basher	501	4	3.13	ShaelShaelShaelShaelShaelShael
Windhammer	485	4	3.03	ShaelShaelShaelShaelShaelOhm
Athena's Wrath	475	4	2.97	ShaelShaelShaelOhmOhm
Odium	460	4	2.88	ShaelShaelShaelShaelShael
IK's Stone Crusher	445	4	2.79	ShaelShaelShaelShaelOhmOhm
Buriza	444	4	2.79	ShaelShaelShaelShaelShaelOhm

Wolfbarb best

Item	Avg	FPA	Score	Runes
Odium	741	3.33	5.6	ShaelShaelShaelZod
Hellslayer	925	5	4.6	ShaelShaelShaelZod
Earth Shifter	864	5	4.3	ShaelShaelShaelZod
Steeldriver	831	5	4.2	ShaelShaelShaelZod
Doombringer	718	4.33	4.1	ShaelShaelShaelShael
The Grandfather	802	5	4	ShaelShaelShaelZod
Ribcracker	788	5	3.9	ShaelShaelZod
Tomb Reaver	780	5	3.9	ShaelShaelOhmZod
Executioner's Justice	776	5	3.9	ShaelShaelShaelZod

Wolfbarb budget

Item	Avg	FPA	Score	Runes
Odium	511	3.33	3.8	ShaelShaelShaelShaelOhm
Hellslayer	654	5	3.3	ShaelShaelShaelShaelOhm
Earth Shifter	652	5	3.3	ShaelShaelShaelShaelOhmOhm
The Grandfather	633	5	3.2	ShaelShaelShaelShaelOhmOhm
Steeldriver	625	5	3.1	ShaelShaelShaelShaelOhmOhm
Buriza	406	3.33	3	ShaelShaelShaelShaelShaelShael
Executioner's Justice	586	5	2.9	ShaelShaelShaelShaelOhmOhm
BK Sacred Charge	380	3.33	2.9	ShaelShaelShaelShaelShaelShael
Messerschmidt's Reaver	568	5	2.8	ShaelShaelShaelShaelOhmOhm
The Cranium Basher	561	5	2.8	ShaelShaelShaelShaelShaelOhm

Axes

Hellslayer

This weapon consistently tops the charts. The 200% base ED is unassuming, but the 300% max ED, combined with a base that's top heavy makes this weapon scale out of control. The large damage range lends itself to fury which has a natural averaging effect being a multihit attack.

• +50 vit/str. The strength wont let you wear the item sooner, but it will allow you to use a sacred armor for extra defense

Messerschmidt's Reaver

Has the same max ED property as Hellslayer making it top heavy.

• +20 all attributes
  
• Bonus attack rating
  

Executioner's Justice

• Casts decrepify on kill. Arguably better than amplify damage if you are one shotting enemies
  
• -Target defense
  
• Crushing blow
  
• Curse resistance
  

Ethereal Edge

I always thought the ethereal and indestructible combo was too good to be true, but it performs well with an ED/IAS corruption. Lacks any noteworthy stats.

Warlord's Trust

A good defensive weapon.

• Self-repair
  
• Physical damage reduction
  
• Vitality
  
• All res
  

Humongous

Underperforms in damage, but it's worth mentioning as it has a unique affix. Fortified maps and the recent splash range changes to fury has further dropped its utility.

• +Splash range
  
• Crushing blow
  

Maces

The Cranium Basher

• Amplify damage proc
  
• All res
  
• Very high crushing blow
  

The Earth Shifter

• Crushing blow
  
• -Requirements
  

Windhammer

This used to be a top tier weapon, but has fallen out of favor after nerfs to its attack speed.

• Crushing blow
  
• High min damage
  

Steeldriver

This can drop as early as act 5 normal and then be upgraded twice to a thunder maul.

• -50% requirements equates to about 127 points saved in strength
  
• Fairly common
  

IK's Sacred Charge

• Crushing blow
  
• Very common
  

The Gavel of Pain

Does not make it to the dps list, but it has amplify damage and is relatively easy to acquire. A good budget option.

• Amplify damage proc
• Curse Resistance

Swords

Odium

One of the new uniques in PD2. Best for wolfbarbs, but can be surprisingly good for druids.

• Reduced curse duration

The Grandfather

Despite having no innate IAS, this is one of the strongest weapons in the game due to the massive +max damage.

• Bonus attack rating
  
• +All attributes
  
• +Life
  

Doombringer

Another good defensive weapon.

• Casts weaken on strike
  
• Bonus attack rating
  
• +%Maximum life
  
• Auto-repair
  

Bing Sz Wang

Who even knew this thing existed?

• +Str
  
• -Requirements
  
• Freezes target
  

BK's Swords

These can be good if you hit max sockets. Sacred charge comes with crushing blow and all res, Tribal Guardian has deadly strike, strength and cold res. If you wear it with the BK ring you also get cannot be frozen.

The Vile Husk

Not on the list, but has amplify damage. Could be useful on a wolfbarb.

• Amplify damage proc
• Fairly common

Polearms

Tomb Reaver

Very good for werebear.

• Rolls natural sockets
  
• +All res
  
• Magic find
  

Bonehew

A common weapon that can become very strong with the right corruption.

• Rolls natural sockets
  
• Curse resistance
  
• Fairly common
  

Athena's Wrath

• +Druid skills
  
• +Life
  
• Fairly common
  

Reaper's Wrath

Not on the list, but can be useful as it has amplify damage, and its not too hard to find.

• Amplify damage proc
• Ignore target's defense
• Deadly strike

Stormspire

Despite not having a great sheet dps, this weapon can cast static field which instantly lowers the enemies max %HP.

• Static field proc

Staves

Ribcracker

This was one of the best LoD shapeshifting weapons, and it remains very capable in PD2. The best werebear version is non eth, and only requires 3 sockets which makes it somewhat easier to acquire.

• Crushing blow
  
• Faster hit recovery
  

Ranged

Cliffkiller

Worth mentioning as it is the only weapon that can reach the fastest 3 fpa maul breakpoint. It's not actually good though.

Buriza

Since missile weapons do not splash inherently, you need to wear Bloodfist, Steelrend or The Hand of Broc. You can get crushing blow and deadly strike from bolts.

• Freezes target
  
• 10% Physical pierce
  
• Bolts for extra stats
  
• Fairly common
  

I'm very picky when it comes to movies and TV. In the last ten years, I've genuinely liked less than ten shows. I have loved far fewer.
Starting with the pilot, I loved this show.
I think season 1 is practically perfect.
Season 2 gets dragged down a bit by the whole prison storyline being kinda pointless, outside of foreshadowing. It's not bad foreshadowing either, it's just that the show spends a lot of time on something that probably could have been conveyed in two episodes or less instead. But season 2 develops Darlene and Angela, and introduces Dom... it's all still amazing, it just feels less focused.
Season 3 feels to me like how season 2 should have. Like season 2 it suffers from still feeling a little murky and unfocused. At many points in season 2 and 3, tbh, it could be argued that there wasn't a completely solid reason for the show to keep going. I'm glad it did, it just feels like they meander some.
Season 4. When it first aired, it felt off-putting to me for a variety of reasons, but mostly due to feeling like the show had just flat out cheated in places, and also due to there being SO MANY unclosed plot threads. None the less, i shrugged it off, and just told myself that I was probably imagining some of them due to poor memory etc.
Over the next year, I watched the entire series three times through, and season 1 along with some various other episodes too many times to count. This is not something I do with anything else. I never rewatch stuff that isn't twin peaks or community. OR this show.
But 2 months back, something reminded me of the scene before Angela's death in S4E1. Something about it was bugging me, and so I started the episode, watched it closely, and I felt kinda duped. The direction and performances and production quality are all great as usual, but suddenly there were major issues i started noticing things that are very hard to reconcile with the accepted explanations given by the show and this community as a whole.
In fact, I see two possibilities regarding the truth about this show:
(A) season 4 tells us 1 story at the surface level but that is just there obfuscate the truth
Or
(B) season 4 is a badly written and conceived collection of 13 episodes, despite the direction, production quality and performances all being uniformly amazing.
What makes this suck, is that if it's actually option B, it actively makes everything before it worse - especially seasons 2 and 3 - due to so much of the show being taken up by TONS of stuff, that according to the show and also this subreddit, doesn't matter, never mattered, and why would you even think that mattered, what is wrong with you, you stupid stupid question asker. After all the show tells us everything explicitly point blank in the finale.
Also, if you almost die in a nuclear plant meltdown that you avert from happening, but there is still an explosion and a fire that knocks you unconscious, when you come our of your coma you can be 100% CURED of your mental illness! As long you explain things to your alters nicely, they will finally understand and absorb themselves back into your consciousness so the real you can come out of hiding.
That last part is pretty representive of the issues I couldn't NOT notice this time around. I don't feel like the show we watched prior to S4 ever would have done something like this. I know Esmail has said this was always the plan, but man, for all the people on here who have a meltdown every time someone even mentions a question that falls outside the shows official Canon, or dares to mention anything "sci-fi" - how do you square THAT circle? Because, even though in wish to God it did, as someone very close to me suffers from schizoaffective disorder, mental illness just DOES NOT work that way no matter how hard you cried at the end. Honestly, time travel would have been more realistic and grounded than this. And don't dare try to say "it's just a TV show" or whatever if you are also one of the ones who get mad when sci-fi type elements or other possible interpretations get mentioned. Sometimes I feel like some of the people here, as well as Esmail, are trying to actually freaking gaslight anyone who think the finale doesn't really add up.
Angela's death and the moments that lead up to it, are also very strange and nonsensical in their execution. Why would Price agree to wear a fucking wire so White Rose could listen to him talk to her, tell her WR is a delusional psycho, and that she should really just let it go and move on - just to see of she buys it or not so WR knows if he is going to have his goons, who Price knows are like ten feet away, kill her. WHY WOULD HE DO THIS? And when did he agree to it? And why wouldn't he just write something down for her to let her know what is really happening so that he could get her to safety? Is Price just stupid suddenly? And why would Angela go from wanting retribution on moment to 30 seconds later just standing there as they shoot her in the back? And for that matter, why is WR, who for 3 seasons is calculated and meticulous and keeping everything on a perfect schedule, suddenly so sloppy and petty and obviously evil?
White Rose's whole character changes some in season 3 as well, but dramatically so in season 4, and not in any sense for the better. Up until this season, it was easy enough to believe she was possibly evil, but she was definitely principled and focused and you felt like there was ambiguity to her. S4 drops that entirely. She might as well put on a twirling mustache and laugh maniacally every time she is on screen with the exception of the two scenes in which she speaks to Elliot - in those scenes she seems sincere and empathetic, but due to the overall changes, we know that she is just trying to manipulate him. Or something. The last confrontation between her and Elliot makes no actual sense in many ways, but one of the things that really got to me was that SHE WAS RIGHT about Elliot, and Elliots response to her was just childish and dumb, not showing even a slight capability for reason or making a coherent argument against her.
And okay, the goddamned machine. If it didn't matter, and it never mattered, and people really should stop asking about it already because that's not what the show is about, stupid - then why does it need to be stopped? If it didn't work, then it poses no real threat outside of a nuclear meltdown, right? The plant is what needs to be shut down, not the machine. But Elliot went to infect the machine with malware to disable it. Disable it from doing what? If the machine is immaterial to the "REAL" story because it's a delusional fantasy that never could have worked anyway, and the only danger it poses is causing the meltdown, then why does Elliot go to infect her machine? He mentions that she wants to destroy the world to her. How? With ONE nuclear power plant melting down? And why is it such a problem that people feel that we should have been given answers to these questions? Elliot apparently knows what it does, and he also seems to think it's dumb, but he he goes there to disable a machine that doesn't work in order to keep it from doing something it never could do.
Better question - why was WR waiting for Elliot with the full brainwashing suite all set up for him? He wouldn't have gone if Price hadn't asked him to, to honor Angela, he says. But it must have been a setup somehow, because WR knew he was coming, and started running the machine long before he arrived. WR casually says that this process was never about brainwashing.
I find it funny the things that some people here will cherry pick facts over. In S2E11 most of the true believer types think everything that WR says is bs, EXCEPT for when he tells Angela that young Angela's bruises were fake. They accept this statement as absolute truth, despite WR seemingly brainwashing an entire army to kill themselves without hesitation any time something goes wrong or she says to. But clearly there is no chance she was lying about the seemingly abused girl sitting in front of a desk with a very deliberately placed copy of Lolita on it.
In that same scene, WR tells Angela Pont blank "it was not a coincidence that you and Elliot became the people that you are after the incident at the WTP". But, you see, she is lying in that part, because it makes the ending we got seem less complete. I would say that finding out whatever the hell that incident even was around be far more informative and useful than 10,000 revelations about being molested.
The episode before that is where Darlene talks about being kidnapped, right before Angela is kidnapped. These parallels either mean SOMETHING, or the show is possibly bad
The molestation reveal is a dumb twist in an actually otherwise great episode. I have now read 2000 and 1 reasons why S4E7 is the best episode of all time, and honestly, I get that it emotionally connected with a ton people, but I really don't see how this information changes anything about the story or characters for the better. And not to mention having Vera pushing the whole thing is pretty convoluted, and Vera's reasoning makes less sense even than leaving a computer game that allows your nemesis to shut down the project that is your life's work for no reason even though without that you technically win and also you shoot yourself because of faith or something.
Vera's return overall felt hack and unneeded for the story in S4, but the fact that they brought him back just to awkwardly facilitate a therapy breakthrough that, and I'm sorry I don't want to hurt anyone with my words, but a therapy breakthrough that I personally feel is another lie. When I look at the scene in S3 where Edward collapses, and the conversation they are having, and try to listen with this information in mind - dude, either the show is lying, or maybe the show is just bad. Because that scene is just STRANGE beyond human comprehension for me.in this context. It's so casual. It sounds more like something you might hear between two old, adult friends who got too drunk the night before, and one of them took advantage of the other. This does not sound like a conversation between an 8 year old and his father who it seems must have very recently raped him. I mean, Elliot acts like this just happened in the scene. And what kind of father apologizes for rape like that? I know there are people here who say this is a carbon copy picture of what this situation really looks like. Maybe it is for them, but as someone with some experience in this matter myself, I guess my picture is just a different one. And okay, fine, I can accept it could be like this for someone out there, but I just don't feel like it was the right choice here. The previous understanding that they were talking about Edward never getting treated for the cancer that kills him seconds later made much more sense to me. And besides, I don't know why we needed to know that anyway - because the show isn't really about that anyway, and you don't need answers for everything, right?
Honestly, the subtext of the show, I will agree, does point to Elliot being sexually abused. Just not by his father. It also points to both Darlene and Angela being abused as well, due to the Lolita references throughout the show. Now, I do think Elliot could possibly be blaming his father for what happened to him, but considering Krista is the least developed, most NPC like character in the show, I don't really trust that she is actually trying to help Elliot have a breakthrough - but that she is repeating the proper keywords to trigger this cover memory.
People will say that this is absurd, but WR KNOWS ABOUT THE SEXUAL ABUSE, as evidenced by the strategically placed copy of Lolita and her speaking to Angela as though her and Elliot were a package deal. There was no need for WR to mention Elliot at all. But she does, and draws explicit parallels between the two of them. The copy of Lolita, the abused young Angela, both point pretty clearly to sexual abuse. Darlene straight up uses the title charactes real name as her own alias. This is a lot of characters having been SA victims, so it seems to me that its all connected. Unless Edward was just the sweetest most prolific pedo in town, I think it's more likely something else happened, or at very least, others were involved. That would make 4.7 an episode that tried really hard to convince the audience of something that is just another layer, another obstraction to decipher. Or it's what the shows says it is and it just feels kind of lazy and insipid.
Look, first several times through, I didn't think any of this. It was only on this recent rewatch, after two years of not thinking about the show that I started noticing these things. After I had my theories I ended up here, and some of the cope I read from people here just blows my mind.
I honestly feel that the indoctrination rooms WR speaks to Elliot and Angela in seem to clearly be crafted in a very specific manner, not to brainwash Elliot or Angela, but to trigger the programming done to them as children. WR pretends that he doesn't know anything about Angela is that scene, but the book is right there. The girl is a double of her child self at the exact age the 'incident' is said to have occurred. Either these elements are purposeful and have meaning in the story, or in my opinion, this is just bad writing. Creating 20-30 intriguing mysteries with symbolism and suggestion and carefully crafted moments, only to toss them all and say they were all red herrings and none of them mattered, you freaking suckers, at very least, shows a lack of respect and maybe even contempt for your audience. The specific references to some of this stuff are too numerous to count. Oh, and that's not how red herrings are supposed to work, you don't spend hours of screen time filling the screen and story with hundreds of little 'clues' to mysteries you aren't even sure are mysteries yet. It makes no sense. All the meticulous crafting of scenes and moments and all the detailed set work, and the specifically framed shots clearly being used to tell the audience to pay attention to that stuff - all of that was just to fux with the audience so they wouldn't guess esmails masterminded secret that no one has ever done before of SA from elliots father, and the fact that the character we know as Elliot is actually another alter created by Elliot that imprisoned Elliot in his own mind , that is literally called the MasterMind. And wow, does that ever sound dumb when I type it out.
Why woulf Eliot create an alter like MasterMind specifically to not know who mr. Robot or his father or Darlene or a ton of other people were, but made sure MM knew who Angela, Krista, and his coworkers were, in addition to how to hack anything, oh and also program in his addiction to Morphine. I mean, if you were creating an alter with intention, and the intention was to create a dark antihero superhacker version of yourself, and you could edit out things like who your sister was, what your father looked like, etc - you know, a slick more focused version of yourself, wouldn't you edit out the crippling addiction? The show says more than once that MM was only born a month ago, so it was Elliot assisted by Mr. Robot that created Fsociety? I thought that made sense for a moment, that Elliot freaked out and created MM when he realized his goals were probably going to have collateral damage no matter what he did. So, then he would create MM, his comic book alter, and put himself in the loop so he wouldnt have to deal with the consequences and memories that were sure to come if they pulled the plan off. But then, when Mr robot pulls who were told is MM back into the fold of the hacker alliance, all MM does is fight him on it every step of the way. Not to mention it makes no sense to edit out Darlene, mr. Robot, etc if MM is meant to work with them.
I'm not saying that Esmail is lying, or that the reality the show sold you is definitely not the one it believes it is depicting - it very well be just as the show and so many insist that it is - exactly what the show explains. Nothing more, nothing less. What I'm saying is that if these are the 'real' answers, the show is providing these answers to questions that are different from the ones the show has given us. In other words, the show is actually, much to my dismay and chagrin, actually very badly written and conceived.
Now if MM was an alter programmed into Elliot when he was a child and triggered into life like a sleeper agent by the dark army in order to carry out this plan as a sort of secret weapon...this is strongly suggested by the moment in S1E4 where Mr. Robot in the monopoly mask gives a mask to Elliot and tells him - "It belongs to you now. Made in the Orient. Made just for your head. Now find your monster and turn the key." The whole show makes more sense through this lens. I never noticed it upon my first several viewings somehow - and this was my favorite episode for a long time, ive seen it the most of all. But once I saw it, I couldn't shake it. His father, as the elder statesman of fsociety, seemingly, passes the mask/torch to his son, says it was made just for his head in the Orient, and hands him a key and tells him to find his monster, which the show now tells us is actually MM. If MM was a programmed alter, designed to focus and use Elliots "rage" so many other things fall into place. They trigger the alter as designed, but it's Mr. Robot, the manifestation of his memories of his father that they did not account for. Mr. Robot is antagonistic towards MM because he knows what MM is and that the consequences he is there to bring about will probably lead to elliots death. It's possible, in this context, that Krista is probably sent specifically as a handler for MM, to monitor him and keep him from discovering his true origins, which would likely end badly for WR because they know what they created and what he is capable of. I would also add that in this version, I would surmise that MM was actually "born" a long time ago, but he was placed in the loop and lived there for years. In the loop, Darlene does not exist because as robot loop Krista explains to MM, not Elliot, that removing Darlene from the loop was their best chance at trapping him (elliot prime) here. She doesn't say it was Masterminds best chance at trapping him there, she refers to a they. It is implied it's the other alters she is referring to - but they don't seem to be taking responsibility for creating MM or the loop, and I see no reason why they would be lying to each other about that. It makes more sense if it was the brainwashing programmers she is referring to, and that they created the loop and then MM and then placed MM there. By having this alter living this loop for years, when he was switched on, he immediately tries to seek what he lived in there for all those years - a job at allsafe, a relationship with Angela, and a world without the Washington township plant (which was removed because being the place his brainwashing originally took place, it's presence might trigger him and wake him up too soon, just like Darlene, which backfired, to say the least). Those things really do kind of belong to MM, he lived that loop for so long. Think of the loop in this instance as training of sorts. I can only assume they would have updated the loop periodically as well, to keep MM himself somewhat up to date so that when he is triggered he would recognize certain people, such as Tyrell, who would have been given a 'monster' of his own, placed in that same loop, as well as Angela, but I think Angela's programming failed "you were supposed to be dead 90 days ago" or whatever WR tells her. She seems to swap with a colder, more monster like persona at times, but it's unstable. For a bit at the end of S1, the presence of her father seemed to trigger her. But it glitches or loses control leading to her Think about that - they wouldn't need to supernaturally share the same 'world' they would just all need to be on the same software revision. Once the Monster alters are triggered, they seek out to change the world they see into what they had in the loop - what does this vicious Tyrrell seek? Power, to be the head of e Corp, filled with so much rage, because of what he doesn't have in this world that he had before. Joanna seemed to be more his handler than his wife, and she seemed to know exactly what was going on with both tyrell and Eliot. This version of event explains these things that the show just kind of drops.
Now, I Cannot prove any of that. And the text of the show explicitly contradicts it, but this is the only way I can make thus stuff make sense. Even the ending where in the current Canon he pretty much just decides to not be mentally ill anymore, in this version that would make so much more sense, as he isn't curing serious mental illness through heroism, he is breaking the bonds of his programming. Which, hey, isn't a perfectly grounded concept either, but it's actually more grounded than the alternative.
Sadly, this does not fix the biggest problem with S4 - well, two problems, actually -
1 - the entire premise of the majority of this season - the magical hack they do that somehow bankrupts a 100 billionaires via 2factor phishing like some fuxing 4chan goblins. Many people have pointed out - no billionare would have that much in liquid assets in any single bank account. Period. The entire IDEA of what they claim to steal is not even connected to how things work. Every hacking scene in this show has been brilliant until this. What's worse is that I don't eve understand how this is supposed to stop WR - they wiped her checking account so now she can't buy ice cream for the deus group on the way home? Kidding. But, seriously, compared to everything the fans came up with and everything that came before, this was boiler plate, brainless writing. It doesn't make sense on any level, tbh. So, the idea is that WR is gonna kill Elliot once the project starts "shipping" (must be one hell of a FedEx box) - also, why couldn't she just rebuild a new one there? Nevermind, doesn't matter, I forgot - so, the plan is to steal ALL ZE MONIES, so she can't pay the shipping fees, thereby stopping her from killing them for a little longer? What next? Stalk WR who is somehow poor now, and have tyrell pay her to let him beat her up now and then? If anything WR would just recover in a week or so and kill MM in the meantime. The whole concept of this is asinine and truly below the shows high standards and possibly even below trash level network tv mystery of the week stuff. S4 is already pretty far outside of grounded, sorry believers.

1. The finale seems to me to be missing a major component that I feel was meant to be there throughout Angela. The scripts for season for absolutely stink of frantic rewrites to cover for something. It's pretty obvious what happened here - Portia left the show. They should have recast Angela, but I respect that Esmail tried to roll with it, and make it work without her character - it just feels like that is what seasons 1-3 were heading towards, Elliot, Angela, Tyrell and Darlene all united to fight back and take back control - but originally they would have been plotting to take down the machine itself.

I cannot prove this, to be fair. And I'm probably wrong, but it would have made so much more sense.
But what about the other stuff? If my ideas are so much better, why didn't the obviously more talented people behind the show do that instead? Portia leaving the show can't account for that. And you're right. But something else happened in the lead up to season 4s preproduction that might have just made the whole idea of an underground cabal of secret elites suddenly unpalatable to USA, and possibly to Esmail himself - a little thing called Pizzagate.
Rumors of the pizzagate scandal, leading to crazy people extremists threatening the employees of a small WASHINGTON Pizza joint. It would just look like the show was feeding conspiracy fires. Hell, in the same position I might have done the same thing. And sure, I might be getting the details wrong, but seriously, the story being told in at very least S1 and S2 matches up with this far better than what we got. It matches up with the ultimate ending and the MM reveal as well. This version, go ahead and tell me I'm crazy, but this version absolutely answers all the questions, except for the details of what the machine did. I think it probably was a massive control matrix of sorts, perhaps something that merged parallel realities with this one (not all that sci-fi at this point), it would have been tied to whatever happened to these kids, and it would have been the true source of White Rose's power. They would have banded together, finally realizing who they really were, and they would have destroyed the machine, and WR would have still pulled that trigger, but for different reasons. What reasons would those have been? I have ideas, but that's enough for now.
Seriously, I know these ideas are likely just wrong. That none of this was ever in the plan, and this is just me trying to make sense of the show, because the version we got doesn't really make sense. And I want it to so much. Because I love this show, but if all the symbolism and mystery and surreal everything were nothing but a bunch of puzzle box nonsense that never had answers and was just there to look cool, well, if that's the case then my opinion is sadly that my favorite show was ultimately not very good, actually. There are probably even better versions Than i could ever figure out, and if it was revealed that no, the stuff that I came up with was way off, but here's the real story and the we get hit with mind blowing thing that had to be changed for reasons? That would also be awesome.
But we wont.
I don't expect anyone to read this massive novel I spit out over the course of several hours, but if anyone does, thank you. I did this largely for myself because I needed to get it off my mind. Goodnight.

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• CYCLING FOR PLEASURE, Ajevie Slonk (cute screw-top vials), $5.5: Sea water, sea salt-dusted cypress, pink carnation, oakmoss, and white vetiver.
• O HUSHED OCTOBER MORNING MILD, Ajevie Slonk (cute screw-top vials), $5.5: Dried forest pansy leaves, grape vine, grass, lavender buds, thyme, creeping fig, paw-squished soil, and a whiff of coffee drifting down from the kitchen.
• RING OF LIGHT, Ajevie Slonk (cute screw-top vials), $5.5: Radiant pale musk, artemisia, white lavender, neroli, white pepper, and zingy white aldehydes.
• SKATE PUNKS, Ajevie Slonk (cute screw-top vials), $5.5: Crabgrass, dandelion sap, white clover, purslane, and soil unsettled by skateboard wheels.
• SURPRISE EJACULATION, Ajevie Slonk (cute screw-top vials), $5.5: White pear, white champaca, pink grapefruit, and effervescent white musk.
• THE LAST SYLLABLE, Ajevie Slonk (cute screw-top vials), $5.5: Photos pinned to cool plaster walls, discarded papers, a web of strings, a mirror, a doll, singed straw, scattered books, and unfurled magnetic tape.
• UPSLOPE FOG, Ajevie Slonk (cute screw-top vials), $5.5: Moist clouds rolling lazily up and down low hills of wild grasses, sagebrush, and wildflowers, curling gently around gnarled oaks, majestic pines, and craggy stones.
• URBAN UNDINE, Ajevie Slonk (cute screw-top vials), $5.5: Ocean spray, sea salt, ambergris accord, and lavender.
• WATER OF NOTRE DAME direct , $3.5: Aquatic

DECONSTRUCTING EDEN (all purchased brand new)

• AD ASTRA, $2.5: Sunflowers in a field, under a night sky, gentle wind, softest earth, and wheat.
• ADAM $2: Cedar, balsam, warm skin musks, teak, bergamot, coriander, pepper, tonka bean, and earth.
• ALCUIN, $2.75: White musks and white amber, the pale greens and grays of his marque, with moss and a chypre accord and a base of soft wood.
• AQUARIUS $2: a blend of air with an undercurrent of water, topped with sparkling aldehydes.
• HOMESICK, $2.75: Dogwood, wisteria, tulips, sunflowers ocean air.
• INSOMNIAC, $2.75: white nightgowns, clean sheets, lavender buds, a drop of chamomile, wood floors, skin musks
• JEUNE SAINTE AU LYS $2: pale skin, muted notes of polar, pine, and wood, pale white lilies
• MASTER OF THE STRAITS, $2.75: Stormy sea water, driftwood, bay rum, oakmoss and a couple of drops of hyacinth.
• MOULIN ROUGE, $2.75: a frou-frou of red satin, a frisson of velvet, wooden floorboards, blonde tobacco, red wine, and a drop of absinthe.
• MY GIRLFRIEND’S GIRLFRIEND, $2.75: white musk forms the base. Heart notes of jasmine, soft rose, freesia, lily and black currant. Top notes of pink grapefruit, bergamot and mandarin orange.
• NERVE, $2.75: Blue musk, green clover, soft grey suede, jet fuel, and, white peach tea
• OCTOBER RUST, $2.75: "Cool rusting metal, the last of the maple leaves, black agarwood, crisp air, incense, bonfire smoke, blonde woods, and dark amber."
• SECOND SKIN, $10 (almost half left in 15 mL Bottle): Cold skin, fog, combat boots, cashmeran, metal accord, raindrops, wet stone
• SEVEN STARS, $2.75: Midnight blue sky, sparkling stars, rice, white cedar, and, Buddha’s Hand Citrus
• SILKWORM, $2.75: Silk threads, mulberry leaves, fruit, and branches, salt tears
• SNOW WHITE, $2.75: Clean white musk, blood-red roses, ebony wood, and a touch of the forest, and that infamous apple.
• TALENT, $2.75: Crisp linen, beeswax coated silken threads, Alban rose, and Earl Grey tea.
• WATER ME, $2.75: coconut, dark amber, skin musks, clean water, and satin sheets

FANTOME (all purchased new) $5.5 each

• BUNE: Damp subterranean air, nagarmotha, smooth cave walls, davana, a cold marble altar, & glittering green dragon scales
• COYOCAN, $2: Desert wind, sweet nectar, cool stone, Mexican vanilla, creosote, hibiscus, sage
• KUPALA: Morning dew, davana, fern flower, bonfire smoke, birch leaves, warm summer air
• STOLAS: Bluebells, an unburnt cedar offering, cool night air, lavender, soft owl feathers, blueberries, & a hint of dark chocolate

NAVA

• COUNT CHOCO, Ajevie Slink, $4: Count ChocoCocoa Absolute of Persia, India and the West Indies, Cocoa liquor, Wheat, Cocoa Powder, Vanilla Powder, Mallow and Chocolate Soy Milk.

NUI COBALT DESIGNS (all purchased new)

• DEEP HEALING, 1.15 ml, $3.5: Deep ocean water, bracing wind, cold clary sage, and fresh rain-drenched greens.
• DENDROPHILIA - THE LOVE OF TREES, 1.15 ml, $3.5: The love of Trees.Moss-covered deadfall, birchwood and pine, lingering resins and sunlight through the leaves, a trace of woodsmoke, the memory of vetiver and cedar.
• FROST GIANT , 1.15 ml, $3.5: Himalayan cedar, towering oak, nagarmotha, frozen sage, moss-covered stone, cucumber, and fog.
• GREY WOLF, 1.15 ml, $3.5: White sandalwood, black amber, icy sage, cashmere, stone musk, lichen, softly smoked birchwood, grey suede, mountain springwater, and white peppercorn.
• MERFOLK, Ajevie Slonk (cute screw-top vials), $3.75: The mineral scent of sand, salt, and shells upon the mist, ambergris accord, turquoise musk, warm orris, olive trees, and neroli.
• ORNITHOPHILIA - THE LOVE OF BIRDS, 1.15 ml, $3.5: A wistful effusion of angelica, kava kava, elderflower, linden, mugwort, saffron, acacia wood, purple heliotrope, and mugwort.

POSSETS (ALL PURCHASED NEW; unless marked as FS, all are samples from direct or decant from Ajevie that are $2.5 each)

• 4 SEASONS OF SUMMER: Bamboo, silk, Japanese incense, a hint of water, and fresh green shoots, and a small introduction of sandalwood in the mix to send a cooling breeze your way.
• ALASKA: the chill in the air, but also the perfume of the riot of summer blossoms as they race the sun every year.
• ARC OF VENUS, FS, Brand New Never Used, $16: Sexy sandalwood base, black lavender, calendula, “abstract” musk, sharp grey musk
• BERENICE: Champagne musk, pink grapefruit, a dash of lemon zest, a veil of dragons' blood
• BIRTH OF VENUS: jasmine, aquatic blend, light citrus blend
• BRIDAL CHORUS, FS, Brand New Never Used, $16: a lot of Hawthorne here, a very sugary musk, a kiss of a ""silky musk"" and it's all about silky skin
• DANCE WITH ME, FS, Brand New Never Used, $16: A classy variation of everyone's favorite lavender vanilla but substituting grapefruit for lavender and under-girding it with white musk.
• FASCINATOR: sparkling, very high-key bright crystalline musk, emollient backup musk, sandalwood, cedar and rosewood.
• FLYING HORSE: Bamboo, grated ginger, green tea, luan wood, white floral note
• FROG PRINCESS: To an aquatic base, subtle hints of coconut and mint are added.
• HATSHEPSUT: Bitter beautiful galbanum pairs with the smoothness of labdanum, a bit of oude gum, and a very small amount of the best skin amber.
• HEATHCLIFFE AND CATHERINE EARNSHAW: Heather of the moors, lavender of English, a drop of wildness, oude
• HYLAS AND THE NYMPH: pooled water, lush vegetation, and sneaking scent of sex
• ISABELLA: rose are combined with a light resin, white tea leaf and a rare honey/milky/cream musk. A light dusting of familiar spices.
• LOLA MONTEZ: green of Irish grass accord, deeply green aquatic note, dark and thick labdenum, tonka infusion, animalic musk.
• LOTUS OF THE NILE: The lotus is the prime fragrance in the bouquet, but it is followed by bits of roseate beauty, a sort of dark incense which has been winnowed through the air, and faint aquatic background scent.
• SHIP OF FOOLS: tang of the sea and added a bit of refined leather to get things started, a roll of key lime zest and a goodly portion of faux ambergris.
• SWAN: cool with a light kiss of olive leaf, a blend of three blue musks (from light to dark and a mid tone one), a bit of cork (!) extract, a small amount of osmanthus.
• TERRA NOCTURNA: violet, vetiver, leather, ozone, pepper, sugar, and a crystal musk
• THE WATER BURNS: The essence of earth and high greenery--a hint of smoke but smelled from far away, boxwood, galbanum, and a light hint of Mysore sandalwood.
• XUONG CUONG: A cold green leaf bats against a ghost wood, a lash of green chlorophyll and crystal musk, a bit of luan wood, and a soft ambient earth scent, finished off with sandalwood and yuzu, the latter adds an air of almost black walnut and nutwood-like nuance to the whole.

SIXTEEN92 (all purchased new unless marked as RIS)

• ALL IS BRIGHT Ajevie Slonk (cute screw-top vials). $4: Quiet snowfall, brisk winter ozone, warm peppermint tea, tightly laced ice skates on a glistening frozen pond
• ALL IS BRIGHT, $5: Quiet snowfall, brisk winter ozone, warm peppermint tea, tightly laced ice skates on a glistening frozen pond
• ANDROCTONUS AUSTRALIS, $5: Rum, wild fig, dry papyrus, sweet tobacco, oud
• AQUILA, $5: Juniper, chilld white tea, mountain laurel, soft cotton, airy musks
• AQUILA, $5: Juniper, chilld white tea, mountain laurel, soft cotton, airy musks
• AQUILA, $5: Juniper, chilld white tea, mountain laurel, soft cotton, airy musks
• BEAUTIFUL. POPULAR. LOVED. FEARED. Ajevie 2020 Half Slink, $1.5: Moonflower, tiare, bitter almond, blond woods, heat lightning, asphalt
• BEFANA, $3.5 (decanted into a thicker vial that’s approximately 2/3 full but measured to be around 1/5 of a bottle): Black currant and dried fig, black pepper, forest berries, pressed flower petals, creamy amber, winter spices
• BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR, Ajevie Slonk (cute screw-top vials). $4: Dusty magic shop shelves, dried sage leaf, crystal ball, darkened amber musks, a puff of smoke
• BOOK OF STARS, $3 (decanted into a thicker vial that’s approximately 1/4 full): The smell of space (meteor dust, ozone, metal, ethyl formate) blended with grounding white sandalwood, papyrus, & earthy musks.
• CHILLED CHAMPAGNE, $3.5 (decanted into a thicker vial that’s approximately 2/3 full but measured to be around 1/5 of a bottle)
• CHIROMANCY, $5: Orris, worn leather, ink, porcelain, black truffle
• COCONUT FLAN, FREE (original bottle with a few drops left) - just ask!
• FOOL FOR LOVE, $5: Leather jacket, chipped black nail polish, burning roses, bad poetry
• GRETA, $5: Frosted glass, chilly aldehydes, citrus blossom, elderflower, snow accord
• GRASS HARP, $3.5 (decanted into a thicker vial that’s approximately 2/3 full but measured to be around 1/5 of a bottle): Orange blossom, clover, hyacinth, ruby red grapefruit, sweet basil
• HELIOPHOBIA, decant in chonky vial, $3: Climbing ivy, faded magnolia blooms, moonlit vines, cracked solarium glass, splintered wood, peeling wallpaper, humid air, fog & shadow, feral musk
• I AM ATREYU!, $5: The hopes of all Fantasia: Luck dragon fur, glimmering gold and worn suede, sumac, fire, equine musk
• I AM ATREYU!, $5: The hopes of all Fantasia: Luck dragon fur, glimmering gold and worn suede, sumac, fire, equine musk
• LOUISE, Direct, $5: Sultry amber, red ink, black kohl, night blooms, Tonkin musk (synthetic), wormwood, soft suede, glistening strands of pearls
• LYCANTHROPE, Direct, $5: Monkshood, warm fur, tuber, elm bark, artemisia, galbanum, weathered rock, silver moonlight
• LYCANTHROPE, Direct, $5: Monkshood, warm fur, tuber, elm bark, artemisia, galbanum, weathered rock, silver moonlight
• LYRA, $5: Misty aldehydes, mandora blossom, spring hyacinth, forsythia, new leaves, melted snow
• MIDWINTER DUSK, $5: Chilled evergreen boughs and bunches of mistletoe, a blanket of evening frost, distant sleigh bells, the soft glow of gas lamps on snowy cobblestone streets
• MIDWINTER DUSK, $5: Chilled evergreen boughs and bunches of mistletoe, a blanket of evening frost, distant sleigh bells, the soft glow of gas lamps on snowy cobblestone streets
• SAVE FERRIS, Ajevie Slink, $3.5: "Funnel cakes & lemonade from Wrigley field, salted pretzels, bright blue skies, cool Lake Michigan breeze, Bueller… Bueller… "
• SINTERKLAAS, $3.5 (decanted into a thicker vial that’s approximately 2/3 full but measured to be around 1/5 of a bottle): Cake flour and sugared dough, royal icing, mulled wine, foil-wrapped candies, speculaas cookies, a cozy hearth
• SOLSTICE BONFIRE, $5: Dark rum, grey ash, black amber, firewood bales, pine needle, charcoal, cedar, & billowing smoke on crisp winter air
• TALIA, $5: Vanilla, moss, ivy, soft musk, stone
• THE HEART IS A LONELY HUNTER, RES BATCH, half decant in a thicker vial, $3.5 (decanted into a thicker vial that’s approximately 2/3 full but measured to be around 1/5 of a bottle): Tuberose absolute, soft skin musk, oakmoss, fresh earth, vanilla, iris
• THE NOTHING, $5: The emptiness that’s left: Black clouds, stormy winds, broken mirrors, deep water, rock dust, I will just sit here and let it take me away too
• TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT, $5: Swirls of tranquil incense, flickering farolitos, piñon and juniper wood, far-off carols drifting on desert wind
• TURTLE DOVES, Ajevie Slink, $3.5: Frasier fir, frozen sidewalks, snowy park benches, twinkling fairy lights and silver bells, a flurry of soft feathers, warm mittens, a wooden toy chest, delicate porcelain musk
• VILLAINS, $5: Candle soot, pine rosin, blood red pomegranate, howling forest winds, darkened crystals, sacred herbs
• VULPECULA, $5: Pools of rainwater, soaked pebbles, tomato leaf, decaying tree bark, wild brambles, dusty fur
• WAKING IN WINTER, half decant in a thicker vial, $3.5 (decanted into a thicker vial that’s approximately 2/3 full but measured to be around 1/5 of a bottle): fir needle, hemlock, soft snow, pale woods, delicate mint, frost-blanketed leaves, cold metal, distant hearthsmoke

SORCELLERIE all Sorcellerie are RIS (some cheaper than others to account for fill level differences)

• A PARTY OR SOMETHING, $1: Marigolds, yellow cake, white chocolate, pistachio buttercream, Iso E Super, Cashmeran
• WHAT BIG EYES YOU HAVE, $2.75: Immortelle absolute, lemon meringue pie, pearlescent vanilla musk

STEREOPLASM

• ENCHANTED DEW DROPS, 4.5 mL Roller, $9.5: (dew/jade/light smoke/stone moss) - A glowing vial containing healing dew from the misty peak of treacherous Mount Eumedes (will appear in rain during spring equinox if an acceptable offering of fire is made).
• KING MOONRACER, Doll Size, $3: Oceanic musk, cool night air, sea salt, pu-erh tea and night-blooming jasmine.
• OGOPOGO, Doll Size, $3: Cool Rippling lake, water lily, seaweed and snake skin.
• OPALINE, Mini Roller, $3: Iridescent and heavy stones of opalized amber, birds of paradise, frozen yucca and lacquered teak[pearl-stone/opal-amber accord/birds of paradise/cold yucca/camphorous teak]
• PÊCHE IMMORTELLE, 4.5 mL Roller, $9.5: Saturn peach and aged cognac enclosed in humid jade glass, unearthed after midnight alongside dewy blooms of star jasmine and clary sage
• PEEL, Mini Roller, $3: Spiraled peels of heaven scent Valencia orange, lumia lemon and perfectly ripe strawberries and banana[orange/strawberry/banana/fruity ozone/lemon]
• PICKEREL FROG (LITHOBATES PALUSTRIS), 4.5 mL Roller, $9.5: Night blooming jasmine, wet grass, algae, and tomato leaf.
• POTTED CHIPTUNIA, YellingCat Decant, $1.5: (petunia/leaf/fresh soil/clay/static) - A refreshing, inhibiting flower, grown and engineered in Chiptown.
• REVERIE, Doll Size, $3: Frozen pollen, prickly gooseberry vine, raw cashmere wool and midnight blooming primrose[aldehydic-powdery floral musk/gooseberry fougere/cashmere/wild primrose]
• SCAREDY CATS, 4.5 mL Roller, $9.5: Sheet white marshmallow, midnight sugar cookies and an extinguished candle squares on a hot rainy day.
• SOLAR CROAKUS, Mini Roller, $3: An inner effervescence heightened by notes of warm patchouli, bronze crocus, dry sandalwood, sun flare ozone and warm skin musk[patchouli/sandalwood/bronze crocus/warm ozone/skin musk]
• TOTALLY IN LOVE 4.5 mL Roller, $9.5: Soft purple and glowing from within; raspberry cotton candy with a delicate bouquet of jasmine, rose and heliotrope while shadows dance at sunset.
• UNHOLY WATER, Mini Roller, $3: Barbed wire and rust, sacrificial blood orange, cursed saffron licked by flames of a burning chapel.

Discussion Schedule and Navigation

• 05/25 - Weapon: Golden Fists of Ura
• 05/26 - Weapon: Shooting of The Star
• 05/29 - SSR: Azusa (Summer)
• 05/30 - SSR: Laguna
• 05/31 - Class: Berserker (post-Ultimate Mastery Update)

Check the Wiki for the full list of the Character Discussion Threads.
Please vote for the upcoming featured discussions:

• Character Survey
• Weapon Survey

Newly released/rebalanced characters will be added to the surveys after two weeks of their introduction or implementation.

SSR Character Discussion: Azusa (Summer)

Journal Entry

A samurai visits the seaside in hopes of learning the ways of spending quality time with someone dear, donning a gift from a trusted friend. Little does she know that her encounters from there on will clear the cursed fog from her eyes, paving a new path forward.

Resources

• gbf.wiki Main page
• gbf-wiki (JP)
• Gamewith
• Kamigame

Recruit Condition

• Summer Premium Draw - Obtain Shishisosho

Voice Actors

• Asami Seto

Attributes

• Element: Dark
• Race: Draph
• Style: Attack
• Specialty: Katana
• 4★ Stats:
  • HP: 1,288
  • ATK: 11,160

Charge Attack

• Name: Reppa

Effect	Duration
450% Dark damage to a foe.	Instant
800% Dark skill damage to a foe (Cap: ~1,685,000).	Instant
All Dark allies gain 100% Armored (50% block).	0.5 turns

• The hit rate of the charge attack damage and skill damage are calculated separately.

Active Skills

Skill 1

• Name: Mukyo
• Skill Type: Buffing (Yellow)

Obtain	Cooldown	Effects	Duration
Lvl 1	7 turns	Gain 5 Mukyo stacks (Max: 5).	Indefinite
		Gain Instant Charge.	Instant
Lvl 55	6 turns

• Mukyo increases the accuracy of the caster's normal attacks, skill damage, and charge attacks by 10% per stack (Max: 50%).

Skill 2

• Name: Takijin
• Skill Type: Damaging (Red)

Obtain	Cooldown	Effects	Duration
Lvl 1	12 turns	10-hit, 500% Dark damage to a foe (Cap: ~465,000 per hit).	Instant
Lvl 75	10 turns

• Hit rate is calculated for each skill damage instance.
  • Has a base accuracy of 90% per hit.

Skill 3

• Name: Teimei
• Skill Type: Buffing (Yellow)
• Obtained: Lvl 45
• Cooldown: 7 turns

Effects	Duration
Gain Teimei.	5 turns

• Teimei applies the following effects:
  • Can't normal attack
  • 80% DMG Reduction
  • Hostility +60
• Gain the following effects at the end of the turn while Teimei is in effect:
  • 1-turn cut to other skill cooldowns.
  • Gain 1 Mukyo stack (Max: 5).
• Teimei cannot be removed.

Support Skills

Skill Name	Effects
Toward Unclouded Eyes	100% boost to ATK (Perpetuity) and 100% boost to damage cap.
	Reduce accuracy rate of normal attacks, skill damage, and charge attacks by 50%
To Endure is to Succeed	Restore all allies' HP (Cap: 1,000) and consume 1 Mukyo stack when an attack successfully deals damage.

• To Endure is to Succeed:
  • Only 1 stack is consumed upon performing normal attacks regardless of multiattacks.
  • Only 1 stack is consumed upon using "Takijin" skill regardless of how many hits land.
  • The charge attack and its bonus skill damage effect count as a separate sttacks and can consume up to 2 stacks.

Extended Mastery Perks

Attack	Defense	Double Attack	Critical Hit	C.A. Damage
Attack	Defense	HP	Critical Hit	Light DMG Lowered
Attack	Critical Hit	Debuff Resistance	Light DMG Lowered

Helpful topics to discuss

• What do you like or dislike about the character?
• What role does this character fill and what content do they work particularly well in?
• How would a new player make the best use for this character?
• How does this character compare to their other versions?
• How does this character perform in the following:
  • OTK
  • Farming Stages (Short to Medium fights)
  • High Difficulty (Long fights)
  • Full Auto
  • Battle System V2
• How are you to build a team setup for this character?
• How does this character compare to the others who play a similar role in the same element?
• Is this character worth sparking for or using an Anniversary Ticket?
• Which EMPs would you prioritize?
• Which Over Mastery and Aetherial bonuses are best to look out for?
• Which type of Awakening Bonuses work best for this character?
• What would you like to see them gain for an EMP Skill?

I spent the remainder of the evening after the "hike" sorting out my thoughts. Trying to, at any rate. Writing it all down helped, but I was still exhausted and confused.
I woke up in Frankie Preston's bed the following morning. I instantly knew it wasn't mine due to the lack of Dorito crumbs in the sheets. Even so, it took me a while to come to. Once I'd rubbed my eyes and untangled myself from the blanket, I found the man himself sitting upright beside me, fully dressed with his shoes on, presently reading a book. "Morning, Sunshine," he muttered, not looking up. "There's water on the nightstand for you. A muffin, too. I wasn't sure what to get."
I let out an incoherent murmur to which he huffed a laugh and rested his hand on the side of my face. "You were still as a rock, you know."
"I'm sorry for messing up last night," I said, my voice cracked and dry from sleep. "I shouldn't have gone looking for trouble. I should've stayed low and just watched those two."
"What's with that tone? I'm not about to lecture you. I get wanting to take revenge. You did fine as far as I'm concerned. And I think Markov is okay with everything, too. After all, any proceedings against the Collective are highly legitimate now or whatever. Plus, she got that lady cultist in custody now, and she's looking forward to the interrogation. She called and explained it to me on the phone earlier, but I wasn't paying attention." He shrugged to himself and I reached up to tug aside his book's cover. "It's Wuthering Heights," he told me, gently removing my hand. I tried to grab it again, but he pulled it out of my reach. "Oh!" He sounded amused as he finally set the book aside to hug me. "You could have just said something."
"Don't you have to work today?"
"I called in sick. Of course, my six moms know I don't actually get sick so they'll suspect something's up. They're probably gonna be all over me."
"You never get sick?" I inquired.
"No. It's one of the nicer aspects of inhuman nature."
"I'm still not getting any answers on that?"
"Don't worry, you will. Sooner or later."
We went out and took a walk in the park, which was equally weird and nice. It seemed such a normal thing to do. It was a bright, nearly windless day, and the sun shining down on us provided a gentle warmth. The previous days' rain had left the trees heavily laden with drops of water. Occasionally, some would dislodge from the leaves and branches they occupied and plop down on our heads.
I asked Frankie whether he would be alright with checking in on Nettie Peterson together. He chuckled, joking that she would probably just love to see him, but ultimately agreed. Once my best friend was due to be off work, we went around to her house.
Strangely enough, the most drastic changes in other people seem to happen without me really being there to witness them. Kit Sutton had somehow turned into a somewhat responsible roommate without me even noticing. Before I knew it, we had become friends. When my savior human opened the door for us, I felt distinctly reminded of that other development. Nettie, not unlike a butterfly emerging from whatever they call that odd little sleeping bag caterpillars make for themselves, had apparently come out of her dark state of mind all by herself. Her eyes lit up when she saw me and she wheedled us inside with much the same enthusiasm I was used to. She had us sit down in the garden while she tended to her flowers.
I watched her closely. Her skin had regained much of its healthy glow, her hair was washed and shiny, the clothes she wore clean—a flowing blouse, mom jeans and sneakers. She had clearly picked them out with care, like she normally did. It was good to see her restored to her old self, but I couldn't help but feel like something was wrong.
"Are you sure you're okay?" I asked.
"I have to be, don't I?" she replied, her cheerful tone coming out more forced than she'd likely intended. She was cutting away crushed and wilted leaves from one of her small bushes, shaping it in the process. "It's over. Life goes on."
"Does it?" I tilted my head at her.
"Can we talk about anything else? Literally anything?" The snapping movements of her garden shears came faster; more forceful. Frankie Preston and I exchanged uncomfortable looks. Figuring it would make for an interesting topic, I proceeded to tell Nettie about our exploits the night before. Halfway through my story, she had ceased her plant styling activities, blankly staring at me from where she sat on the ground. By the time I was done, she had taken off her rubber gloves and was slowly massaging her temples.
"One of these days, Eva. One of these days, you're gonna give me a heart attack. I don't even want to ask about what you get up to anymore, I think. I'm afraid of the answer." She threw Fran a grateful glance. "Thank you for getting her out of there safely."
The waiter smiled placidly. "Sure." Turning to me, he added in a whisper, "So we're not going to mention that you saved me from the FunFlair guys twice before this?"
I grinned mildly and shook my head before assuming a more serious tone. "Nettie, it's great that you're all better, but you were really down before. If this is just an act, I'd prefer you didn't put it on."
"It's not an act," she said sternly, raising her hands to her hips. "I've resigned myself. That's all. There's nothing to be done, I've accepted it and I've moved on."
"That can't be healthy," Frankie remarked. "You know what would help? Punishing the world in some way. You could take it out on your kindergarteners. Tell them a scary story so their parents have to stay up all night with them. Incite a dirt throwing fight and send them home all muddy. Set up a boxing ring and have them go at each other like in a dog fight. Wouldn't that be far more rewarding than sucking it up?"
Nettie Peterson looked unimpressed. Her dark eyes roamed the young man like she was trying to gauge whether or not he was serious. "You're some kind of sociopath, aren't you?"
That she shouldn't have said. Frankie's serene expression morphed into his customer service smile. I don't know when I started deciphering this being's voice and countenance, but there I was, picking up on the spiteful undertone in what he said next.
"I'm just saying, if the woman I fancied disappeared in such a way, I'd find outlets for my grief." His eyes darted over to Nettie as if to ensure she'd heard him correctly before settling on me, observing my reaction. All I could do however was stare at my best friend.
Her glossy lips had parted. She met my gaze, her thick, expressive brows rising a good deal. "I…" she began, faltering and starting to fumble for words. "That's to say, Kit was… we, um…"
"Oh, Eva didn't know?" Frankie asked, perfectly flat and monotonous. "I had no idea it was a secret. I'm sorry, it wasn't my place to say. I wouldn't have mentioned it, really."
Something about that sent a chill down my spine. I shot him a glare, to which he drew himself up and turned away. Meanwhile, Nettie finally broke from her stupor and blurted out, "We were together, okay?"
For a moment, I sat quietly. “Frank, please go home,” I said at length, not quite looking at him. “We’ll talk later. We will.”
He looked like he wanted to say something, but quickly thought better of it, rising to his feet and storming off. Ignoring the queasy feeling in my stomach, I walked over to Nettie and plopped down on the ground beside her. “So that’s what this was about,” I began.
My savior human nodded meekly. “We… we didn’t want to tell you. Not for the time being, at least. We hadn’t defined the relationship yet, i-it was all so new and weird, I felt weird, but it was good, you know? I just wasn’t ready to think about it that way yet. And you’ve only ever seen me date guys, I didn’t know what you’d think…”
“I wouldn’t have thought anything,” I replied. “How long has this been going on?”
“Not long. She called me up before she came back to you a couple weeks ago. That’s kind of when we started seeing each other in… in that way.”
“Romantically?”
“Yes.”
I hesitantly extended a hand to caress her upper arm, locking eyes with her. There was a profound sadness in her expression, a watery gleam. She took a deep breath. “Before that, we used to text back and forth occasionally. I always felt kind of weird about her. Somehow, she got under my skin everytime she was goofing off, what with her little jokes and all. We kept talking, though. I was always so irritated when she was around, and that’s so unlike me, I just ended up wondering… And then when she showed up here, it all kind of came together. W-we did. She stuck around and we spoke and everything simply made sense all of a sudden. I didn't know she liked me, too.” She swallowed audibly, her voice brittle and husky as she went on. “Kit isn't like anyone else I’ve ever had feelings for.”
“Not like anyone else, as in… a woman?” I prompted, raising a brow.
Nettie grunted. “Oh, shush! Don't make me feel guilty for being hesitant at first. I know it’s not a big deal to you, but try going through life believing you’re straight and suddenly running into some cute ditzy punk girl and realizing you’re not. It’s all sorts of confusing, believe me. I was scared it was gonna be weird because it was my first time with a woman but Kit somehow made it easy. It was a bit of a whirlwind, sure, but it felt natural and… just good.”
“Did you tell Eli?”
“No. But I think he suspected. That man knows me like the back of his hand. We’re basically siblings, remember? He was always tactful, never really pressured me into admitting anything, but he made a couple puns here and there, so… I do believe he knew.” She fumbled with her limp gloves, fixing me with a wavering smile. “So?”
“So what?”
“What do you say?”
“Is there something you want me to say?” I shrugged. “I’m only glad I understand now. I wish you’d told me sooner, but that’s your business. Also, I didn’t tell you that I’ve been running around with our waiter, so I guess we’re essentially even. By the way, I’m sorry he put you on the spot like that. You didn’t deserve that. How did he know about you two anyways?”
Nettie pursed her lips. “He might have seen us around the diner or something. I’m not sure. I’m, uh, not gonna comment on whatever you two got going on. You know what you’re doing. Hopefully.”
“Ah, thanks. Then I won’t be giving my opinion on whether or not I consider that deadbeat dork Kit to be worthy of you.”
My savior human snorted. “Much appreciated. Though I guess it’s not really an issue anymore either way.”
I shook my head. “Don’t think like that. We can’t let her go. I certainly won’t, not after this.”
“What do you mean?”
I rose to my feet. “I’m going to drag her blue ass back out of the ocean and have her make an honorable woman of you.”
I don’t believe she thought I was serious. The realization had set in by the time I’d dragged her down to the beach with me, though. We had taken Wammawink for the drive. Wammawink is the name of Nettie’s pastel pink motor scooter. It has a sidecar, which she straps me into with great care whenever we ride. It took her about twenty minutes to get us down to the shore. The more I talked about possibly retrieving my roommate, the brighter and realer the shine in her eyes became. Hope was not yet dead, that much was for certain. I led her down the cliffside and past the rocky expanse to where the concert had been held. It seemed ages ago. Some wistful part of me thought I could hear the faint sound of Kits singing above the gentle murmur of the waves.
The beach was golden in the afternoon sunlight. The sleepy tide sent water steadily dribbling into the sand beneath our feet, the drier patches giving way ever so slightly as we walked along. The faint outline of a plan had taken shape in my mind. We headed for the grotto.
"It makes sense now," I thought aloud. "The creature we fought at the concert was targeting you. The deep ones must have known that you two had a bond."
"I guess so," she replied uncertainly, eyeing the maw that opened up in the natural stone wall before us. "Going spelunking will help us how, exactly…?"
"I figure it tried to take you in there for a reason. This place has to be special. If you want, you can always wait here, but I'd prefer to have you with me. I only want to look around a bit. Maybe there's a clue of sorts on how we can contact Kit."
She sighed. "Now I know why you wanted me to bring my flashlight." She produced the object in question and handed it over before linking arms with me. "Of course I'll stick with you."
The inside of the cave was far too quiet for comfort. The eerie silence was only broken by the occasional plinking of water dripping from the walls and ceiling. We made an effort to step around the puddles glittering on the bumpy ground as we proceeded into the dimness. The sunlight threading through the grotto's mouth didn't reach very far, so we were glad for the bright beam of our torch. I let it travel the hollowed rock, the light crinkling oddly as it reflected off the pools of water that seemed to grow larger the further we got. Nettie Peterson was hanging onto my arm, her grip growing a little tighter with every passing minute. Her face was a set mask of grim determination, belied by the nervous twitch of her eyelid and the occasional quiver of her lower lip.
My own discomfort was undeniable as well. My heart was thundering in my chest and clammy beads of perspiration were running down my face. Every step we took caused a dull thud, the echo of which bounced off the rough stone walls to be funneled by the length of the cave. There were several smaller passages leading off into all directions, but Nettie and I agreed on always picking the largest entrance. This way, the path we took was far easier to memorize and there was little possibility of getting lost. After the third or fourth time we ducked through one of the doorframe-like archs, we were met with an imposing sight. A large room with high ceilings opened up before us. There was natural light seeping through several small cracks overhead. Stringy, pale plant life hung down or clung to the walls. A round lake filled up its entire bottom half.
Both Nettie and I stopped in our tracks. There was no solid ground to walk on anymore. On top of that, the beauty of this subterranean body of water had literally stunned us. Ripples were rolling off the center of its surface, casting a faint shimmer onto the ceiling. The stone-filtered light from outside set the lake aglow, bright speckled dancing across it like sprightly wisps. All I could do was taken in a soft, reverent breath while the very thoughts running through my head escaped Nettie's trembling lips.
"Have you ever seen something so beautiful?"
I would have told her yes, but I truly could not remember when. Unfortunately, the lake also appeared to form something of a dead end. I considered turning and checking out another passage, only for my savior human to point out a ledge running along the side of the room. It was narrow, but no doubt wide enough for the two of us to walk it single-file. We clambered up the shelf-like protrusion and, hand in hand, began to move along. It was bumpy and wet, and I almost regretted continuing this way. I couldn't seem to properly place my feet, my soles slipping a few inches with every step. Glancing over my shoulder, I could tell from Nettie's grim expression that she was experiencing similar difficulties. My pulse was racing, my lower lip caught between my teeth as I attempted to focus on safely making it across.
The cold sweat that leaves my palms was actively working against me at this point, and before I could react, the flashlight had slipped through my shaking fingers. It bounced off a bump in the shelf, then rolled off the edge entirely to disappear in the dark water with a thick, loud plop. I cursed, turning to Nettie with an apologetic expression.
"It's fine," she assured me, squeezing my hand. "It's bright enough here as it is and we'll still have our phones for light later."
I smiled gratefully, about to take my next step when a deep, guttural gurgle came rumbling up from the depths of the lake. The sound hovered in the damp, salty air for a moment or two. My best friend and I froze in place, her grip on my hand turning into an iron vice. For a split second, I believe even my own heartbeat stilled.
"What was that?" Nettie Peterson whispered, her voice barely audible over the sudden charged hum of the water below. Her question would not remain unanswered for long. The droning noise of vast water masses shifting began to fill the air as from deep, deep beneath, something made its way up. My savior human and I helplessly pressed our backs up against the wall, trying to keep steady against the force of the vibration shuddering through the rock. The ledge we were standing on was quaking as though the cave itself had come alive and was trying to throw us into this growling, cold abyss.
Within seconds, the thing broke the surface, causing enormous splashes and sending countless drops of water raining down on us. I blinked them out of my eyes just in time to see it unfurl.
It was not a living being in its entirety, merely part of one. That however only made the sight before us all the more terrifying. Simply put, it was a human arm. Just not of any human I had ever encountered. It was enormous; every webbed finger of the hand it ended in was about my size. There were six of them, each bending in far too many places—I thought I could count as many as eight joints on the longest one. Its nails were more like claws, long and sharp with what looked like barnacles growing underneath them. The thin, nearly translucent skin between its fingers was stony gray, just like the rest of it. The hand slowly began to grope around, searching the walls of the cave. I knew right then and there that I couldn't possibly fight it. If it came to it, I'd try to hold it off with everything I had, but something this huge couldn't possibly be defeated. We had to flee, as long as we still could.
"Oh God," Nettie breathed. "Oh God, oh God, oh God…" Her hand was trembling in mine.
"Quick," I hissed. "Turn around, we gotta get out of here!"
She nodded helplessly, her eyes blown wide in terror. When she began her retreat from the ledge, she nearly took up running. I pulled her close just in time to prevent her from slipping. "Watch out!" I uttered, unable to suppress the fear in my tone. "Don't slip, we're dead if we fall in."
My savior human let out a whine, then took a deep breath and bit her lip. Slowly but steadily, she placed each foot in front of the other, leading us off the ledge. My ears were ringing. I couldn't tear my gaze away from the gigantic arm as it blindly felt along the walls, its nails coaxing a grating sound as they scratched upon the rocks. It was getting closer and closer, the side of its thumb nearly brushing the top of my head for a split second before I could withdraw. I had to press my eyes shut for a moment as my chest tightened painfully. Finally, we had reached the end of the shelf and wasted no time in jumping off.
We didn't even bother with any cell phone flashlights. As soon as we were on solid ground again, we darted through the entrance of the room, back through all of our carefully chosen passages before finally staggering out the mouth of the cave into the sunlight. We were panting like dogs; Nettie was forced to crouch down and sit still for a while to catch her breath. Meanwhile, I was seeing stars. Colorful dots and sparks of lightning seemed to dance before my inner eye as I blinked furiously into the afternoon sun.
"What the fuck was that?" my best friend, having regained her ability to speak, rasped out.
I turned to face her, my knees wobbling like jello. "I have no idea."
"You think it… you think that fish person from the concert was trying to take me there? Dump me into that lake?" She lowered her voice. "It would have fed me to that giant thing, wouldn't it."
I held her gaze, my mind racing. "I don't know. Maybe the giant's different."
"What do you mean?"
"I think we might have just seen Kit's father."
X
1
2: deadbeat roommate
3: creepy crush
4: relocation
5: beach concert
6: First date
7: Temp work
8: roommate talk
9: a dismal worldview
10: warehouse
11: staircase
12: explanation
13: hurt
14: hospital
15: ocean
16: diner
17: government work
19: I sat in a shopping cart for most of this