First flooring and tile akron ohio

I have a couple of questions.
First, when recording via USB and recording a DI track - is it recording the clean DI signal with the pad on or off? I'm guessing off but wanted to verify.
The other question I had, lets say you have a patch on Helix floor that you move over to Helix Native - how would I go about turning the pad on there? Am I missing it or is the only option to set the input gain on the slider? Would dropping a gain block at -6db be the same as the pad? I thought I read that before but I cannot find the post.
Thanks in advance!

So I recently bought a house that had the bathroom "upgraded"...few months later I notice the shower grouting on some out of site area of the tile was never really finished. I was wondering why my drain smelled so bad - washed it out with vinegar and baking soda multiple times, poured boiling water down it....and now I see the smell actually came from in between the tiles where grout was just FORGOTTEN. I am kind of angry but I guess I need to just figure out how to fix it.
What is the best grout to use for this area if I were to do it myself? It's quite a large gap like one inch thick. I was also planning on sealing the tile and grout for the shower floor because I don't trust the previous owners to have done so (or even used the right grout to be honest).
Also since water has been getting under the tiles - do I need to take it apart and clean it?
https://imgur.com/hYzuETC
https://imgur.com/6sX66Jr

Since i was young i was kinda obsessed with death seen first bodies in family when i was areo 3-4 , after i saw my fist suicide body when I went to visit my dad at the army base and the sentinel committed suicide by blowing up his head manage to get a glimpse of it and i can still remember clearly the bone snapping sound as they tried to lay him flat to carry him out . I was hit by car twice sa a kid once about 4 yeas ago lent from 4 floor to second for 3,2,1 floor on concrete or grass off mountain almost or a frew times all before 14-15 so i really didn't expect to live this long . I think myself aster seeing that soldiers corpse that i won't commit suicide cuz i see is as a cheat. But in the last 2-3 year mind is like do it look around the world what the point of living here , and honestly i can't answer that question only that mai 6 year old self decided not to do it and maybe I'll make my mom (that i haven't seen for around 5 years ) cry . And now I'm keep getting intrusive thoughts like is i go i should go with a blow make everyone question their sanity or start killing or random attacks on totally radom people because why not . It's getting harder and harder to quiet my fucked up thought. I used to love life and was an happy tipe of person but now in just a ball of self hatred that helps everyone even when he knows he's going to get screwed over because fucki it why not

First/Previous
“Woah!” Jack yelled out as he fell out of bed Luckily he hadn’t been foolish enough to have set Dante up right next to him just in case of any accidents like this.
What stood in front of him holding a tray looked like a collection of rocks, pebbles and dirt vaguely moulded into a humanoid-ish form. Staring at it wide-eyed he levelled his gun at the thing as it slowly motioned to the tea it.had, and began to pour Jack a cup.
“Good morning Jack!” Zayle perked up as they walked in after the hulking thing. “No no no! Please don’t shoot him! He’s really nice and still owes me favours!”
Jack just stared back at the Squa’Kaar with the biggest ‘WTF’ expression on his face, not saying anything as the pile of rubble held out the mug for him to take, which he eventually did after he got the feeling it was staring at him.
“Zayle…” Jack began. “What’s going on?”
“Are you okay halveer?” Zayle asked. “My watcher spirit alerted me that you were starting to awaken so I thought I would make you a hot drink to wake you up! I sent my earth spirit to take it to you while I helped tidy up downstairs with my air spirit!”
“What time is it?” Jack asked with a groan as he got up, taking the mug from the earth spirit and taking a sip and taking care not to flinch from the taste. It was strong and bitter, and it seemed like Zayle had tried to counter that by putting way too much sweetener in it, but there was no way Jack was going to tell them after they were kind enough to go through the effort of making it and bringing it to him.
“It is early morning, I didn’t expect you of all people to awaken for a while yet!” Zayle commented. “Chiyo told me you and Nika probably would be up though. Are you feeling better?”
“Yeah.” Jack lied.
“Oh good!” Zayle perked up. “I hope everyone else does too! Uh…would you like me to get you some clothes to wear?”
“Shit!” Jack cursed as he got to his feet, quickly downing the rest of the drink and putting the mug back on the tray as he quickly went to the pile of clothes on the floor and threw on a thin undershirt and shorts.
“No need to be embarrassed.” Zayle shrugged nonchalantly. “Earth spirits don’t really understand that kind of concept.”
“Uh…” Jack began, staring at the gecko, who scoffed.
“What? I can grow a penis whenever I like, why would I be bothered?” Zayle smiled at Jack with a shrug.
Immediately, Jack spat out the drink still in his mouth in shock, spraying the earth spirit with the milky liquid. If the spirit seemed upset, it didn’t show it.
“What the shit!? Okay, time out.” Jack spoke up after he finished spluttering. “I don’t even know if you’re joking or if you’re serious. That was too much!”
“Sorry!” Zayle covered their mouth to stifle their laugh. “It is true though! My species evolved to do it to deal with population issues but it doesn’t really matter these days. At least it helps with the stupid school uniform policy! Have you ever tried wearing a skirt in a breezy winter? It’s not good!”
“Can’t say I have.” Jack replied with the first genuine chuckle he had in a while. “Is it really that terrible?”
“It’s really bad! My people grew up in warm swamps, but not baking hot like the summers here! That’s when you get horrible chafing with dangly parts! It takes a few months to fully change but usually Rayle and I time it well to match the seasons!”
“Too much information!” Jack snorted with a laugh. “Maybe we can change the topic to where we’ll be heading to pick your stuff up?”
“Sure, but I think Nika might need some help.” Zayle looked to the side, seemingly at nothing. “My watcher spirit is telling me she’s having trouble getting to her feet.”
“Alright, let's not wake anyone up.” Jack decided, looking at Dante with concern. Despite everything that had happened, the ‘dog’ hadn’t woken up from their slumber, and Jack quickly rearranged the blankets so they were better covered, but in a way that allowed everyone to check up on him without disturbing him.
The two headed downstairs, followed awkwardly by the earth spirit with pebbles tapping the wood as it trundled along.
“Morning.” Nika groaned as she stumbled her way to the living room clad in just her sports bra and shorts, her lower half surrounded by some kind of faint smoke that snaked around her legs and tail until she was able to grab a blanket and wrap it around herself. “Thanks for the assist, Zayle.” she sighed as the smoke coalesced and formed a small humanoid shape that stood at attention next to her.
“How are you feeling?” Jack asked the Kizun as Zayle quickly saw another opportunity to be proactively useful in making tea while her spirits awkwardly just stood there.
“Still sore, still stiff.” Nika sighed. “But healing naturally. I won’t let Alora give me a jump start when there could be lives at stake back at the Clan Bharzum compound. We have many friends in medical comas or being put back together for resurrection, and I’ll be damned if I take magical healing over them.”
Jack nodded as he sat on the sofa next to her. “No morning workout for us then?”
Nika rolled her eyes at him. “Careful, I might try a lap around the district even if I have to crawl! I’ve been hurt before but I never get used to just sitting down on the sofa and not doing anything productive. I know many of our friends like to do that and I’m not one to judge but I hate being forced to do nothing else without any choice in the matter.”
“We could find something practical.” Jack considered. “I don’t want to think too hard about homework but the Industrial Vocation bot we were working on was fun!”
“The one with the eight legs you thought up?” Nika grinned. “Yeah we can do that here while the others are still sleeping.”
“I can start making breakfast if you want?” Zayle asked as her earth and air spirits lingered behind her, having not been given tasks to do. “Or if it’s too early I can summon my water spirit to clean the pipes?”
“You should take a break instead and calm down.” Jack smiled. “You’ve done more than enough already and none of us even asked you to! Maybe you can sit down and rest while you tell us about your soon-to-be-ex-landlord instead?”
“The Laird?” Zayle asked. “Paranoid, crazy and power hungry, though nothing like the horrible and powerful enemies I’ve heard you’ve encountered. He wasn’t too terrible in the past but I think ever since his position started to get tenuous he’s been making a bunch of terrible decisions. Originally the security was alright and it was an environment Rayle and I were comfortable with so we stayed there because it was something we could afford while we attended school, but for a while now the dues have kept going up and we get less for it. He’s been bringing in extra thugs that like to try and fine people or intimidate residents into not leaving. That’s why I was hoping to get our things and get out before things get worse!”
“What was your original plan?” Nika asked curiously. “You mentioned before how you and Rayle had it all planned out. Where would you have moved to?”
“We were tempted to sign up to the Red Legion as aspirants. They provide free lodgings and military training after school and we have friends that have already signed up. The benefits are really good if you have magical capabilities, though it does mean we’d be tied to their operations on the Ring. Alternatively Kritch mentioned to Rayle that his family might be in a position soon to accept some tenants! Rayle was really keen on that idea for some reason…”
“Right.” Jack smiled, suspecting some ulterior motive on the part of their Lizta friend. “What kind of security has this Laird got? You mentioned thugs.”
“Security before was a local militia before there were arguments about pay and a bunch of them left. The Laird brought in anyone that could shoot a gun irrespective of their background. Bandits in all but name! Some of the neighbours have reported being mugged or robbed by them, so that’s mainly why I asked you for your kind assistance in the matter. Rayle and I can usually move around and go to the shops without really attracting any attention but moving out certainly would.”
“I get it.” Jack nodded. “A capable group wouldn’t be a tempting target for the bandits so your hope is for them not to harass you to stay.”
“Yes.” Zayle nodded. “I don’t like violence or confrontation but I hate being unsafe or robbed even more! If it is possible to get to the vault where the Laird is keeping the things he takes that his thugs aren’t skimming off then it may be possible to return sentimental items to my former neighbours if they’re able to get out themselves. They’d probably reward us too if we were to do it, and I’d feel more confident making the attempt with you than if it was just myself and Rayle.”
“I can’t guarantee we’ll go for that but it’s something to consider if the opportunity presents itself.” Jack pointed out seriously. “How were you able to pay your way before if you’re a full-time student?”
“My spirits are very utilitarian and Rayle is quite skilled with druidic magic.” Zayle shrugged. “Mainly odd jobs. We’ve volunteered with the Greenwardens before and sometimes we are able to sell byproducts of what we are able to produce which keeps us afloat. We are even able to grow GrainCoin and other AstralCurrencies sometimes which helps keep us in the black, and we’ve learned a bit about trading in the process.”
“Might be a good idea to repeat that to Alora.” Nika pointed out after stretching herself out more on the sofa. “We have a lot of very fertile garden space and an enthusiastic Eladrie that’ll be all over you, and Rayle too once they recover.”
“Yes…” Zayle’s expression drooped at being reminded of Rayle’s condition. If Jack had to guess, the reason for Zayle throwing themselves into chores and jobs was as a coping mechanism to try and forget. It probably wasn’t healthy, but then again, who was he to criticise?
“What’s the district like?” Jack added. “Please don’t leave anything out. If we’re helping you we need to make sure we do so in the right way so we don’t run into any problems.”
“There’s a lot of abandoned and ruined properties. It should be easy to hide and lay low if needed.” Zayle thought. “Oh yeah, lots of boat travel where bridges have been busted. I usually use my spirits but with more people I suppose that might be a problem.”
“Boat travel?” Jack asked in confusion. “What kind of place is this?”
“It’s swamp land suited for my species?” Zayle asked, sounding confused. “Why wouldn’t you need a boat for a place like that? Many islands of buildings amidst the canals, and the best humid environment we can afford to keep us moisturised. It is a large district spread between several factions that may turn into a horrible war, probably the next time the fog builds up.”
“Hmm.” Jack pondered. “Sounds almost like Venice. I went there once but it was packed with other tourists. A bunch of islands connected by even more bridges with the buildings constantly sinking into the ground. It has a lot of history but it’s basically just a tourist trap now.”
“Huh?” Zayle asked, now even more confused. “I have never heard of this…Ven-iss. But yes, several of the buildings sink into the ground by design to create an underground space in certain places. I am pretty sure the vault area has multiple access points with tunnels dug underneath so loot can quickly be taken there and possibly smuggled out. I’ve had watcher spirits follow some of the goons to confirm it.”
“How long does it take for you to normally get to your place when you enter the territory?” Nika asked, trying to get the gecko back on track.
“Just less than half an hour normally, but that is when I utilise my spirits to travel with Rayle, who also helps with their druidic powers.”
“So likely longer.” Jack nodded. “Do you at least have a map?”
Uhh…” Zayle fidgeted around for their commlink, reaching into one of the pockets of their newly-liberated dressing gown from the collection of clothes Jack and Sephy had robbed before bringing it up. “I have the sections of it I frequently use?”
“That’ll be useful.” Nika nodded. “Best wait for Sephy to wake up before we check it out and map a route.”
“Sometimes the thugs gather or patrol in places but I just take an alternative path.” Zayle added. “Even easier if you find or take a boat but there is usually the occasional sentry you need to watch out for, though maybe they’ll be more focused on where the other gangs will be coming from.”
“Something to bear in mind.” Jack noted. “I’ve seen how quiet Sephy’s drones can be, maybe if she has a few hovering overhead we can avoid any trouble outright. However from what you’ve described the militia have a habit of harassing innocent civilians. I’ll tell you now, I won’t stand by and let that happen if they try something like that around me. How strong are they if things go to shit?”
“There were several infrequent patrols between two to five guards last time I was there.” Zayle recalled as she filled another teapot and offered everyone drinks, which both Jack and Nika happily took. “Though many times they were drunk or high on something and didn’t really do much.”
“Maybe just keeping up appearances.” Nika reasoned. “Or just taking an easy job for easy pay before their employer either dies or cuts and runs with what they have. If they don’t live in the community they don’t have any motivation to act like proper guards.”
“They may also get the idea to take it for themselves if they’re able to and the Laird isn’t able to rein them in.” Jack speculated. “He seems like a poor leader, though I can’t tell if it’s from malice or just plain stupidity. How did he claim the territory in the first place?”
“Both malice and stupidity I think.” Zayle shrugged. “And he was next in the chain of command when the previous Laird and her chosen successor both apparently died to a Zorn raid. I think he was a clerk or a tax collector or something.”
“Makes sense why he’s not the best overall leader then.” Jack replied. “Okay. It sounds like a stealthy approach to your place will work as long as we detect and react to potential encounters quickly to avoid them, which will be very doable if we at the very least have Sephy and Chiyo along for the ride. Based on what you’ve told me we may be able to go today depending on how the others are feeling. It’s a risk but the situation over there could be played to our advantage if the militia is looking a certain way and we can sneak in and out right under their noses.”
“I agree.” Nika nodded with a grin. “You have a good mind for tactics.”
“Yeah.” Jack nodded in thought. “My main concern however is for your neighbours who haven’t left yet who may be caught in the storm. Some might be able to get out but there may also be those that are vulnerable and can’t leave unaided. The vault is optional, and I imagine Sephy would agree with you Zayle that we should try and hit it, but that might be a risk too far. We can entertain that idea when we get there, only if things go well.
“That’s fair.” Zayle conceded. “We can only do what we can, but we must be realistic about what we can do. We cannot save everyone over there.”
“We can only do our best.” Jack agreed. “Also I think I’m ready for breakfast now…”
Zayle quickly got to their feet, eager to throw herself into another task but Jack shook his head.
“No Zayle, you’ve already done a lot so sit down. I’m cooking, you need to take a chill pill. Nika, what do we have in stock?”
Jack admittedly had a limited number of recipes he could cook, but his father had decided he should know basic cooking skills at his age, and had Jack helping him with a few weekend family breakfasts they’d do to give his mother a break. Fortunately he confirmed that Zayle and Vanya were able to eat the simple meal he had planned as he counted several eggs, some prepared bacon-like equivalent they had that was suitable for nearly every species and the basic staples to make pancakes. He had no idea if it was officially called a Canadian or American breakfast or not and it didn’t really bother him. All Jack knew was that it was an easy dish to do for multiple people and he didn’t know many other recipes he could do. It would be the second morning in a row he would be making pancakes, so he resolved to try and find other simple recipes he would be able to learn. He knew he had a cooking class at school next week with Chiyo, so maybe he’d pick something up there or add a cookery book to the house shopping list?
As the smells of the hearty food wafted throughout the house, the others slowly appeared. Chiyo was first, having already been awake and meditating in the basement, lazily floating upwards and plonking herself on the sofa without too many words, except that the others that were able to were waking up, she was hungry and she couldn’t wait to eat what was cooking!
Sephy and Alora eventually joined them, with Nika and Zayle clueing them in on what their likely plans would be for recovering Rayle and Zayle’s belongings.
“I could come along, but....” Alora began, though Nika shook her head and countered. “We’ve already discussed it. You know Clan Bharzum will need medics and I know how serious you are about your healer’s oath. I think a smaller group would be best for remaining undetected anyway, and even if things do get bad the opposition isn’t going to be anything near the Pallid Pit or the Klown attacks, which Sephy, Jack and Chiyo can handle. As much as I hate to say it I can’t come myself, but I can help coordinate from here via comms and keep an eye on Dante and Vanya at the same time.”
“Alright.” Alora nodded and finally agreed. “Shoot me a message when you head out. How long do you expect to be?”
“It’s a few hours travel from here to my place.” Zayle noted. “Though I calculate that by my usual route, I expect it to take longer to get there safely and silently. Plus we need to get my stuff but I know what I will do for that.”
“So let’s just say a few hours, assuming all goes well.” Jack shrugged. “How do you plan on getting the stuff out then?”
“Rayle and I managed to bind a powerful earth spirit that is currently residing there as part of our current Lodge, along with a few other more powerful ones.” Zayle grinned, looking proud. “It’ll be able to handle getting the stuff out of the district, and I’ll have the other spirits accompanying me until I can use them for something or need to dismiss them once I dispel the Lodge for good, since those ones are too powerful to bind to my astral field. I’ll need to recover as many of the reagents we used in the original construction as possible in order to more quickly rebuild here once we find a suitable space.”
Sephy, how many drones do you have available? Chiyo asked the Skritta, who shrugged.
“I can bring a few more than I did for the Oracle Run but I don’t want to take my whole stack. I was thinking of having a few camouflage observer drones hovering above nearby so we can see any danger before it sees us.” Sephy reasoned. “I don’t have any capable of shifting stuff but if you say your earth spirit at your home can do it, that’s on you.”
And Chiyo, you should be able to detect others lying in wait?” Jack asked.
Yes, unless they purposefully shield themselves as Svaartal did on our way back from the Oracle. However since we’re not expected, it’s extremely unlikely we’ll run into that problem.
“Alright, then I guess I won’t need to be too worried if I offer my healing to Clan Bharzum.” Alora sighed. “I’ll head off as soon as I can then but I would like it if you kept me updated. I’ve got to say I’m surprised you’re taking being sidelined as well as you are Nika, it really isn’t like you.”
“That’s because I’m confident they can pull it off and Jack will keep everyone safe.” The Kizun shrugged. “Just don’t be too tempted to go for the vault if it’s too great a risk.”
“We’ll at least take a look and make sure we have a plan.” Jack shrugged. “From the sounds of it the Laird’s position is tenuous at best so if we don’t make the attempt others probably will, but if we do it we make sure we sort out anything else. If not, there’s apparently abandoned properties around that you can satisfy your kleptomania with Sephy.”
“I take offence to being called that!” Sephy replied in mock horror. “I am merely an entrepreneur seeking opportunities!”
“Don’t be in a rush to go though.” Alora warned. “I don’t want Vanya waking up and finding barely anyone here before we’ve explained what we’re planning for today.”
She’ll probably be another hour before she wakes. Chiyo informed her, and Alora simply nodded at that information in acknowledgement.
“We’re not in a rush.” Jack confirmed. “I think most of us are still tired so we’ll go once we’ve eaten and woken up a bit more. Maybe we can get there when it starts to get dark since I know Sephy’s drones will still be able to see anyway?”
“Good plan.” Nika nodded. “Although…Zayle, how does militia activity differ from day to night?”
“Uh…” Zayle thought. “The Laird wants more guards patrolling at night but in practice it doesn’t differ that much. It might actually be better since Rayle and I have seen guards goofing off when they think nobody is watching.”
“Alright, sounds good.” Jack nodded. “We’ll rest up and make our move in a few hours. Get ready.”
*****
First/Previous
Another day, another mission! (Got to go for a side quest at some point!)
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Hello everyone, recently bought the machine and I think my first string job was okay, but I have some questions.

1. When I was done stringing the mains and if I ran my nails through the strings (as you you would with a guitar) the pitch didn't sound the same for all the strings? Is this something to be expected or does this mean something went wrong?
2. Sometimes the racquet handle would get in the way for the tension bar, why does this happen?
3. I don't know what this object is called, but the blue thing where you wrap the string around is what I'm referring to here. This blue thing has 4 bolts in it. Does top one (when aligned parallel with the floor) need to be screwed in tightly or left a little lose? I ask because I noticed that the machine wouldn't grip the string if I tightened it all the way.
4. and in general do all those bolts in the blue knob need to be screwed tightly?

For some context, me and my family immigrated to Canada when I was about 7 y/o and lived at my aunts house with her 3 kids/my cousins until my parents were able to afford a place around a year later. I was naturally very close with my cousins (older F, same age F, younger M) who were all around my age and I spent lots of nights sleeping over even after our family had moved out. We stayed very close and when I turned 18 and decided to move out, (for many reasons that I won’t dive into) I stayed over at their house until I could afford to rent a place for myself.
The first memory I have that I can think of was when I was sleeping over one night at their house when I was about 14. I woke up in the middle of the night to someone touching my stomach and saw my cousin, younger M, just rubbing my stomach with his finger. When he realized I woke up, he tried to hide himself next to the bed. This happened a few times after that where he would sneak under the blankets and would just touch my skin and then hide when I woke up. I told his sisters about this and they kept telling me that I mustve been dreaming and I believed them cuz that made more sense back then.
Another memory that I have was when we went on a family trip together and I was wearing a dress and sleeping on the floor. I woke up in the middle of the night and my legs were bent at the knee, slightly spread open, no blankets on me, with him sitting by my legs and I think trying to look under my underwear. I realized and pretended I was still sleeping and moved my legs back down if that makes sense so he would stop looking down there.
When I was living with my cousins at 18, he would sneak into my room almost every night and I would catch him watching me sleep with his hands in his pants. Eventually he started getting more sneaky and would slightly open the door and waited outside the room until I fell back asleep and then attempt to sneak in. I spoke up and told the rest of the family about this but they didnt really take me seriously.
I dont know what else he has done to me, but I also remember waking up one day after a night of heavy drinking with no pants and underwear on, and when I asked my other cousins what happened, they told me that he helped me to my room and apparently I just took my pants and underwear off myself in front of him and he just watched me lay down with no blankets to cover me or anything. I was terrified he might have raped me but I had no memory of the night to say anything. I moved out after that.
I still have trauma and get scared that people will sneak into my room even when i live by myself but my cousins keep telling me that isnt sexual harassment because he never went further than just touching my skin.
I know this was long but can you please tell me what this is?

I am looking for this GAME from 2 years on this thread but no luck so far i still Hope this time it will be different :
The game is first person shooter.. i believe it had a health bar system. Meaning old game.. starts of with a mission on hanger or shore. I had to shoot my way by terrorists like people who uses akm and i later remember dying many times during this mission. As there was a Sniper standing very far on a ship deck. There were more people on every corner at this stage most on a higher plateau than on a ground level.
(I also recall that there were Big names for objective locations marked by large texts as header above objects and on walls? Like you see in Splinter Cell Conviction. But, take this as a grain of salt 🧂 as i might be getting confused here)
After i cleared first tutorial mission which i mentioned in above texts with sniper guy or ak guy i forgot... i was given second mission.
Before i even start a second mission... i remember seeing a screen where i believe i was given a choice to pick and decide on various guns and grenades... what to take with me during the mission. Once i start. I dropped off of a helicopter alone by a rope near a sewer drain hole 🕳️ After which i make my way slowly towards a ladder... after walking for a while through the hole. I reach up the stairs and killed a terrorist and soon entered a stadium of some kind.
This stadium was taken by terrorists and rigged with bombs. My objectives was to kill terrorists, disable all bombs in time and not sound alert.
I also remember during this mission i had the ability to peak in nearby cameras like watch dogs and gaze my enemy movements before i made a corner turn. I many time went in blind and died as enemy spotted and shot me dead.
I remember one guy standing at the top of the Building and he shot me many times while clearing through below floors. Yes, there were various floors to this stadium... it had some broken above floors which made some sections difficult as threat from above and in front often surprised me. Also remembered there were wooden boxes as object to hide behind by crouching when a terrorist usually approached my direction.
Also, i was alone like Splinter Cell games. But, with no stealth takedown... it was all like counter strike shoot and KiLL
It had Bomb Defusing mission in second or third level like Counter Strike just with very BiG stage and Many Terrorist roaming in fixed area.
Its not Project IGI but that is a pretty close to its perspective camera look. No Delta Force and Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six.
You could take FBi Hostage Rescue as base reference but i don't recall it being so gloomy, dark and about hostages like FBi Game.

this is gonna be a long one. i am 19f and my grandma is 77f.
my grandma has a reputation of lying, attention seeking, and manipulation. she over exaggerates things to the max whenever possible. which is why that last year, when she was in the hospital for chest pains, i had doubts that anything was actually wrong. she had just moved in with my dad after being evicted from her house. turns out, she had a tear in her aorta and had emergency open heart surgery.
she miraculously survived, but her health has been a constant downward spiral since. i moved back in with my dad about 7 months after her surgery. the agreement was that i could live there rent free as long as i helped her when needed and helped around the house. i have held my promise for nearly a year, but i’m starting to crack.
at first, living with her was great. she was like the mother i never had, and respected and supported every boundary and way of living i had. i’ve always done the same with her with a few exceptions, but nothing major.
around a month after i moved in, she started to show her true colors. she began to lie to my dad saying that i never help her, and i just lock myself in my room with my boyfriend all day. whenever she asks for help, i drop everything i’m doing no matter how important. she then berated me in front of my father when i called her out for lying, and told me that my boyfriend was going to leave me and i deserved it. she half assed an apology when my father took my side and told her she was out of line.
i’m not in contact with my mother or my sister. i made it clear to my grandma that i don’t want them knowing anything about my life, because they both treated me like shit. she proceeded to tell my sister details about my life on several occasions, and would cuss me out when i begged her to stop. the last time she did this, i refused to talk to her for two weeks, and she feigned a a major health decline and ended up in the hospital for 3 weeks to try to get the attention back on her.
as i said before, her health has been declining rapidly. this is solely because she refused to listen to her doctors when given specific instructions, such as to rest as much as possible and a strict diet for her diabetes. she didn’t listen, and ended up with acute stage 4 kidney failure, and congestive heart failure. her heart is only working at 15% capacity right now. all because she can’t sit down and rest, and not eat sweets 24/7. she steals my food, and buys a totally different product to “make up for it”. i started having to stash my non refrigerated foods in my bedroom.
she hates my boyfriend. one time, my dad had left a water bottle with pure vodka in it sitting on the counter by mistake. my grandma found it, and took a sip thinking it was her water (ew, who drinks from random water bottles without being 100% sure it’s yours?) and came banging on my door screaming at my boyfriend. i had to call my dad to tell him what was going on and he chewed her out for assuming that my boyfriend was the culprit. she swore up and down that she witnessed him pouring the vodka into the water bottle. she has cussed him out and told him to kill himself after he had asked her to not let our cat eat her cereal.
she’s been given a prognosis to be dead by june 2023. her doctor explicitly stated that we cannot tell her, because the stress would make it worse. so we’ve resorted to allowing her to do whatever she wants, because there’s no going back now. she refused to listen to her life or death instructions, and is now going to die before my birthday. she won’t get to see me graduate college. she won’t get to see me get married. i resent her for leaving us with this grief all because she couldn’t handle not having sweets and being on her feet all day everyday.
her mind is starting to go, as well with her bowels and bladder. she is a walking biohazard, and leaves her adult diapers sitting in the bath tub until i snap and beg her to get rid of it. she once left a vomit soaked rag in the bathtub overnight, even though she knows i have emetophobia and can’t touch that shit. she leaves massive shit stains on the toilet seat, and i have to clean them. she shit on the kitchen floor once without realizing, and i fucking stepped in it. i sobbed to my dad. i deep cleaned our bathroom today, and found out that she threw away one of the bathroom rugs because she shit all over it. i had to scrub shit stains off of the inside of the toilet seat.
she has an old shitzu. she talks to this dog like it’s her son. she spoils him so bad that he refuses to eat dog food, he will only eat human food or cat food. he is obese and has cataracts. he jumps on our legs at the table because she refuses to not feed him scraps while we’re eating. he has long sharp claws that she won’t cut. he eats my cat’s dry food and throws it up all over the carpet.
she left the front door open when she took her dog out to pee, and my cat escaped. she let my cat escape, and shut the door on her. my cat never came home. i think she’s dead.
she harasses my dad through text while he’s at work. some nights, he stays late for some extra money. she spam texts and calls him asking when he’ll be home. he’s in his mid forties, he’s not fifteen.
she once told me to fuck off and “get out of my house” one of the times i called her out for telling my sister about my life. my dad owns this house. bought it with his own money 24 years ago, and pays the mortgage on her own.
she has hospice nurses that come make sure she is doing okay. a nurse came to help her bathe, and she refused the nurse. she left a massive ass print on the toilet seat from the shit caked on her ass. she fakes coughing and breathing episodes when she wants attention.
she blames all of her wrongdoings on her childhood. how her trauma makes her treat us like garbage. i always felt bad for her, but i think she’s always been the problem.
i fucking hate my grandma. she has made my life a living hell with her hostility and ignorance with her own health. she let my beloved cat escape, and i just know she’s dead. she’s gotten out before, and she always stayed close and came back in. i have to clean up her disgusting biohazards in the bathroom. i have to live knowing that she’s going to die at any moment, and i’ll probably be the one to find her. i’m so exhausted and angry at these circumstances. i just want her to die already so i can finally have peace.
TL;DR my grandma is a hostile narcissist and has made our lives a total nightmare.

I just wanted to share a bit of her story and why she was so special.
I’m 25. I’ve had my dog/soulmate for 12 years. Even after I moved out of home she’s been with me. The last 3 years she’s been living with me and my partner too. My mom originally rescued her for my older sister after she had a double lung transplant. I had a lot of mental health struggles growing up and my dog was always by my side. Every single night she would sleep in my bed with me. We always had such a special connection.
A few years later in 2015 my sister passed away. I was 17 and devastated. But my dog was right by me and helped through it. She just knew how to comfort me and would give me so much love whenever I was overcome by grief for my sister. My family started falling apart after the loss of my sister in multiple ways I won’t get into. My dog was one of the only things from my childhood I felt I still really had.
In 2015 my dog also escaped from our backyard and was hit by a car and had to have her back leg amputated. Now she was a tripod. But that didn’t slow her down.
Last year in November, our perfectly healthy happy pup got diagnosed with oral melanoma. In a panic, my partner and I just turned to the first options they gave us because we were told if we wanted more time with her we have to act fast.
In January, $12,000 later she got half her jaw removed but they weren’t able to get all the cancer.
Recovery from the surgery was a nightmare. I felt so much regret wash over me because I felt I had traumatized her by putting her through surgery. Her behavior completely changed. She became much more reactive and grumpy. I struggled with so much guilt for putting her through surgery and it didn’t even change the outcome.
We weren’t willing to do anymore treatment because of how terrified she was every single time we took her to the vet. So we just let her be. We decided to euthanize once we saw how fast and aggressive the tumor was growing back in her mouth and we knew any bigger would cause serious issues and suffering.
In her final days she was so unhappy. She would snap at my partner any time he would pet her and on the last two days she wouldn’t even let me pet her. It was devastating. Normally her and I were attached at the hip. She would sleep next to me and I would spoon her every night and hold her all night. This was a massive change.
On Tuesday, the morning of her euthanasia, we set up an area on the living room floor with multiple layers of blankets and a heated blanket she always loved. We surrounded her by her favorite toys and beautiful flowers. We gave her an entire steak, salmon, boiled eggs, and cheese.
While waiting for the vet to arrive our dog was laying in the area we made but she wouldn’t let us even sit near her. It was excruciating to not hold her and have her look up at me as I pet her in my arms like always.
We had to trick her with a treat to get her to let us carry her while the vet snuck up behind her to give her the first shot to sedate her. She let out a welp and then I laid her back down. I had to wait until she was completely sedated before I could hold her. And then we continued with the euthanasia and she passed in my arms. I’ve been just devastated.
I felt like I failed my babygirl. The last interaction we had while awake was me tricking her and her cry when she got the first shot. I just keep replaying it in my head. Every time I close my eyes I see her and can’t redirect my thoughts at all.
I know it will get better in time. I know loss. But she was my baby and I couldn’t be there for her to soothe her. Fuck this 💔💔💔
If you read this far, thank you for reading my story with her. She was truly special dog and I just hope her spirit is with my sister now wherever that may be. 💔

Working on remodeling the sexond floor of a 30x40 barn.
Old setup was proper framing and plywood floor with paneling on the walls, ceiling tiles screwed into ceiling beams (yeah I know smh).
Ripped out paneling and ceiling, replacing with drywall. The plywood is in rough shape, but I have about 1”below wall to add a layer of osb to help strengthen the floor (easier then ripping out under the walls, etc)
Would you put a layer of thing to insulation or vapor barrier down between the plywood and OSB? Top layer of osb will just be coated aster with epoxy floor paint for now eventually probably laminate down the road , just out of budget.

Hello,
Has anyone here made significant progress w/o pelvic floor therapy?
I had my first session last week and while it was great, it’s just sooo expensive, lol. 🤦🏾‍♀️ One session was like $698 and although my HRA covered it, there’s not gonna be much left available in my account after my second session.
I have dilators, but I just felt like I’d be able to make greater progress if I coupled dilating with actual pelvic floor therapy.

Hello! So my wife (and to a lesser extent myself) are musicians and have a ton of pretty quality music/recording gear. We bought a home awhile back and want to turn one of them into a music studio. The biggest issue is soundproofing. The walls are pretty standard drywall and the floor is tile. Has anyone ever done a project like this? What materials/techniques did you use? Thanks!

Just successfully finished my first run today (Ascended! Since if the game gave you the option to ascend, why not :p), For som reason i've been stuck at 15-20 for quite some games, while in this game 20-25 is a first time pass, I assume that's because am stacked with potions, ankh and finally know how to use the green seed. So, here's some questions that I still want to know.

1. Is the seed corresponding to the strength potion the holy seed? Since that's the only seed that kinda boosts the hero's power. Also if I put 3 random seeds, are the 3 corresponding potions always 33/33/33? Or are some potions like potions of strength are more rare.
2. How to deal with food issues, for som reason met with food issues on floor 15-20, if I didn't have the horn, prolli would starve, but is the horn really necessary?
3. Is there only the giant axe which requires 20 strength? Or is there any other weapons (same tier)
4. Should I upgrade the scroll of transmutation to the black version? I mean some other heroes ability are quite good, but need luck.
5. Is there any other way to counter ranged enemies other than hiding behind doors? Since in some areas, specifically a floor on 20-25, is in a large area with those damned floating eyes .w. I know I can brute force through (invis/swift/health potions) but seems wasteful.
6. Is archer a good character selection? Since that's the hero I used to finish the game, her infinite arrows are quite useful dealing with piranhas and kite enemies.
7. Are bombs/elixers/catalysts/ crystal really useful? Based on description, they seem pretty meh and quite wasteful to obtain.. Same with most of exotic scrolls and potions actually, except upgraded experience potion, upgraded upgrade scroll and upgraded transmutation scroll (Refer to question 4)
8. How do you find traps, do I really need to search every step I take? Sometimes it will show up automatically but sometimes not.
9. Also is there any secret recipes for alchemy? Because some of the items can be thrown into the pot while there's no recipe for anything with it.

Andd that's all I think! Thanks all and have a good day-

Home staging is the art of decorating and preparing a home for sale in a way that appeals to potential buyers. It's a crucial step in the selling process that can help you sell your home faster and for a higher price. If you're planning to sell your home, here are some of the best home staging tips to help you get started.
Declutter and Depersonalize
The first step in home staging is to declutter and depersonalize your space. This means removing all personal items like family photos, trophies, and other memorabilia. You want to create a blank slate that potential buyers can imagine themselves living in. Removing clutter will also make your home appear larger and more spacious.
Clean and Repair
Before staging your home, it's important to clean and repair any damage. This includes fixing any leaky faucets, patching holes in the walls, and cleaning carpets and floors. A clean and well-maintained home will appeal to buyers and make them feel more comfortable during their visit.
Create a Welcoming Entrance
Your home's entrance is the first impression that potential buyers will have of your home. Make it welcoming by adding a fresh coat of paint to the front door, cleaning the windows, and adding some potted plants or flowers. You want to create a warm and inviting atmosphere that will make buyers excited to see the rest of your home.
Add Neutral Decor
When staging your home, it's important to keep the decor neutral. This means using neutral colors for your walls, furniture, and accessories. Neutral decor will appeal to a wider range of buyers and will allow them to imagine their own personal style in the space.
Highlight Key Features
When staging your home, it's important to highlight its key features. If you have a fireplace, make sure it's clean and lit during showings. If you have a beautiful view, make sure that the windows are clean and unobstructed. By highlighting your home's best features, you'll make it more attractive to potential buyers.
Rearrange Furniture
The way that your furniture is arranged can make a big difference in the look and feel of your home. When staging your home, rearrange your furniture to create an open and inviting space. This may mean removing some furniture or rearranging it in a way that maximizes the flow of the room.
Use Lighting to Your Advantage
Lighting can also make a big difference in the look and feel of your home. Make sure that all of the rooms are well-lit and that you have a mix of ambient and task lighting. This will help create a warm and inviting atmosphere that will appeal to buyers.
In conclusion, home staging service is a crucial step in the selling process that can help you sell your home faster and for a higher price. By following these tips, you'll be able to create a welcoming and attractive space that will appeal to potential buyers.

I’ve tried everything but she has never done a pee outside so I can reward her for good behaviour. I’m desperate, please help me as my house is becoming impregnated with horrible smells. She learned to potty pad when she was 2 months and because she couldn’t go outside until fully vaccinated she thinks it’s ok to keep doing it. The problem is that she ONLY does it indoors! Here’s what I’ve tried so far: removed all pads and carpets; took her out first thing in the morning (she held 3 hours until came home to do it); scheduling her eating/drinking and taking her out after meals 3 times a day; cleaning her spot with enzyme cleaner and blocking the way with furniture (she finds another spot); firmly saying “No!” and taking her to the balcony immediately after she does it inside (balcony is a better option than indoors); say “potty” everytime I’m with her outside (she just sniffs the floor); putting her pad with her pee or newspapers on the ground outside (she ignores or starts destroying them)…I tried everything I read and watched out there. Can anyone has other tips? I live in an apartment so I cannot leave her outside for hours until she pees on her own.

I almost feel bad for applying that label to anyone, but Jesus tapdancing Christ... With the exception of one particular bit, I wouldn't have just labeled someone trashy based on one thing, or even mentally criticized it at all. It wasn't one thing with this lady, it was all of them that added up.
So, the bride walks in. She's got 7 bridesmaids and both mothers with her. The first thing I hear is about how she's "happy with how [she] Sharpied her eyebrows on this time". She was not joking, they were made with a black Sharpie and were huge. Ok, whatever.
She then tells me her wedding date is 4/20. And yeah, she picked the date on purpose. She also loudly announces that she "paid a lot for her tits" and that I'd better find her something to show them off. She also tells me that her colors are neon purple, neon lime green, and camo. ...Ok, not my wedding.
She then tells everyone she's going commando, which is not my favorite thing, because I am not paid enough to look at your naked bottom half. And here's where I did start thinking "trashy" - she had a tattoo right above her butt crack of a giant, veiny, way too detailed dick spewing everywhere.
She threw all her very poofy dresses on the floor and the way she moved around made it nearly impossible for me to get them off the floor, so the results actually made it tough to do my job.
And her bridesmaids and the moms went nuts. It looked like they had pulled half the store to try on, and for God knows what reason, would take the dresses they didn't like and throw them in a pile outside their dressing room. In the middle of a walkway. I got major stinkeye for asking them to move their shit so nobody would trip.
The point where I mentally lost it was when I got her up to the register. We'd already gone over payment options, which were limited to paying in full or using something like Klarna due to timing, but the minute I turned away, she tried to pull one over on the cashier. "So I only have to put like $100 down to take the dress home, right?"
No! You have to put all of it down! You know this!! (People keep trying to get away with that one and it drives me nuts.)
It took me a full 27 minutes over the end of my shift to clean up from the wreckage they caused.
So yeah, I'm being bitchy, but utter trash, and I hope she never steps foot in my salon again. I just. Don't. Get. It.
.

Last Updated List: 30/03/2023
I have quite a few games up for trade or willing to sell.
Primarily looking for games from my wishlist. Not a reseller, so please do not offer any games which I already have, not interested. Other than that feel free to offer your list of Steam games and something I may not have and fulfills my criteria I could/would be willing to trade for it/them.
If you're either trading or buying please state the game(s) you are interested in and your offer (game(s)/list/money).
 
Few things to note:

• To make a trade you must respond to this thread first, I will not respond or accept anyone outside of this thread.
• Some titles I have more than one copy of, is also listed as such, same for any DLC and non-steam games.
• Not interested in any keys from an unofficial retailesource (aka grey market), curatoreviewer keys (aka beta/reviewebeta-testing), and not interested in anything other than Steam games.
• Also not interested in; abandonware, keys for games that are already free on Steam itself, Steam profile-limited keys, and only slight interest in VR-titles and/or de-listed games.
• When buying, I only accept payments in Euro's. Fees are on buyer.

 
Info:

• Region (and keys region): Europe
  
• IGS Rep Page
  
• SteamTrades
  
• SteamRep
  

 
I kindly ask of you is to be reasonable when making offers to make it a fair trade for both of us.
Let's have a good exchange/trade!
 
NEWLY ADDED:

• Forgive Me Father
• Impaler
• Propnight
• The Citadel
• Viscerafest
• Wrath: Aeon of Ruin

 
List of games:

• 16bit Trader
• 4089: Ghost Within
• 911 Operator
• Airport CEO
• Afterparty
• Alien Breed 2: Assault
• Amnesia: Rebirth
• Ampersat
• Anomaly II
• Anomaly: Warzone Earth
• Arcade Spirits
• As Far As The Eye
• Asterix & Obelix XXL 2
• Autonauts vs PirateBots
• AVICII Invector
• Batora: Lost Haven (wishlist or Paypal only)
• Beholder 2
• Bighead Runner
• Bionic Commando
• Blackguards
• Brothers: A Tale of Two Sons
• Calico
• Call of Juarez: Gunslinger
• Call of the Sea
• CastleStorm
• Cats in Time
• Caveblazers
• Chicago 1930 : The Prohibition
• Children of Morta
• Close to the Sun
• Cobra Kai: The Karate Kid Saga Continues
• Commandos: Behind Enemy Lines
• Company of Heroes 2
• Company of Heroes 2 - Ardennes Assault
• Company of Heroes 2 - The Western Front Armies: Oberkommando West
• Company of Heroes: Tales of Valor
• Cook Serve Delicious
• Cook, Serve, Delicious! 3?!
• Crash Drive 2
• Crazy Machines 3
• CryoFall
• Curse: The Eye of Isis
• Cybercube
• Danger Scavenger
• Dear Esther: Landmark Edition
• Death Squared
• DOOM 3
• Drawful 2
• Driftland: The Magic Revival
• Dungeons
• Dungeons 2
• Dungeons 3
• Eternal Edge +
• Eternal Threads (wishlist or Paypal only)
• Euro Truck Simulator 2
• Evoland Legendary Edition
• Fallout 1: A Post Nuclear Role Playing Game
• Fallout 3: Game of the Year Edition (wishlist or Paypal only)
• Farming Simulator 17
• Feel-A-Maze
• Fight'N Rage
• First Class Trouble
• Flynn: Son of Crimson
• Fobia - St. Dinfna Hotel
• Frederic: Evil Strikes Back
• Fury Unleashed
• Garfield Kart
• Garfield Kart
• Garfield Kart - Furious Racing
• Garfield Kart - Furious Racing
• Going Under
• Going Under
• Gotham Knights (wishlist or Paypal only)
• Gray Dawn
• GRIP: Combat Racing
• GRIP: Combat Racing
• Guilty Gear X2 #Reload
• Guts and Glory
• Haegemonia: Legions of Iron
• Hamilton's Great Adventure
• Hellbound
• Hidden Shapes Old West - Jigsaw Puzzle Game
• Holy Potatoes! A Spy Story?!
• Home Sweet Home
• Homeworld Remastered Collection
• Horizon Chase Turbo
• Hue
• Iconoclasts
• Iron Fisticle
• ITORAH (wishlist or Paypal only)
• Jack Move (wishlist or Paypal only)
• Jurassic World Evolution 2 (wishlist or Paypal only)
• Ken Follett's The Pillars of the Earth
• Ken Follett's The Pillars of the Earth
• King Arthur Collection (Sub ID 25825)
• King of Dragon Pass
• Kingdom Wars 2: Definitive Edition
• Kingdom Wars 4
• Leisure Suit Larry 7 - Love for Sail
• Lucius III
• Mafia III: Definitive Edition (Region Lock: Sub ID) (wishlist or Paypal only)
• Main Assembly
• MARSUPILAMI - HOOBADVENTURE
• Medieval Kingdom Wars
• Men of War
• Metamorphosis
• MirrorMoon EP
• Monaco
• Monorail Stories (wishlist or Paypal only)
• Moon Hunters
• Morbid: The Seven Acolytes
• Mystery of Unicorn Castle: The Beastmaster
• Necronator: Dead Wrong
• NecroWorm
• NUTS
• One Finger Death Punch 2
• One Finger Death Punch 2
• Orbital Racer
• Out of Space
• Out of Space
• Papo & Yo
• Party Hard 2
• Pathfinder: Kingmaker - Enhanced Plus Edition (Region Lock: EU-only: Sub ID)
• PAYDAY 2
• PAYDAY 2
• PC Building Simulator
• Pizza Connection 3
• Planes, Bullets and Vodka
• Police Stories
• POSTAL 2
• POSTAL 2: Paradise Lost (DLC)
• QUAKE II
• RAD
• Radio Commander
• Railway Empire
• Red Faction Guerrilla Re-Mars-tered
• Red Faction: Armageddon
• Red Solstice 2: Survivors
• Remnants of Naezith
• Resident Evil 4 (2005)
• Ring Runner Flight of the Sages
• River City Ransom: Underground
• Rock ‘N’ Roll Defense
• Rogue Heroes: Ruins of Tasos
• Rustler
• S.W.I.N.E. HD Remaster
• Serious Sam Classics: Revolution
• Serious Sam Double D XXL
• Shadow Tactics: Blades of the Shogun
• Shadows: Awakening
• Shadows: Awakening
• Shape of the World
• Shapeshooter
• Shift Happens
• Shing!
• Shut Up And Dig
• Sid Meier's Ace Patrol
• Sifu Deluxe Edition Upgrade Bundle EGS Key
• Sigma Theory: Global Cold War
• Sinking Island
• Small World
• Small World - Cursed! (DLC)
• SONG OF HORROR COMPLETE EDITION
• Sonic Adventure 2 Battle (DLC)
• Soul Axiom Rebooted
• Soul Grabber
• Soulblight
• Space Crew: Legendary Edition
• Sparkle 2 Evo
• Spirit of the Island (wishlist or Paypal only)
• STAR WARS Jedi Knight - Jedi Academy
• STAR WARS Jedi Knight II - Jedi Outcast
• Stacking
• Starpoint Gemini Warlords
• STASIS
• Steel Rats
• Stick Fight: The Game
• Strange Brigade
• Streets of Fury EX
• Streets of Fury EX
• Strider
• Stygian: Reign of the Old Ones
• SuchArt: Genius Artist Simulator (wishlist or Paypal only)
• Sunlight
• Super Magbot
• Super Meat Boy
• Surfingers
• Swag and Sorcery
• Switchball HD
• Syberia
• Syberia II
• The Amazing American Circus
• The Beast Inside
• The Citadel
• The Dark Eye: Memoria
• The Dream Machine: Chapter 1 & 2
• The eXceed Collection: Aural Brutality Edition
• The Falconeer
• The Inner World
• Ticket to Ride
• The Invisible Hours
• The Quarry – Horror History Visual Filter Pack (DLC)
• The Sexy Brutale
• The Smurfs - Mission Vileaf
• The Town of Light
• This War of Mine
• Those Who Remain
• Those Who Remain
• Timberman
• Time Lock VR
• Titan Quest Anniversary Edition
• Toejam & Earl: Back in the Groove
• Totally Reliable Delivery Service
• Tower 57
• Tower of Time
• Train Simulator Classic + 2 DLCs
• Tropico 3 Gold Edition
• Tropico 4 Collector's Bundle
• Unshaded
• Verdun
• Violett Remastered
• Wargroove
• Warhammer 40,000: Space Wolf
• Warhammer: End Times - Vermintide
• Where The Water Tastes Like Wine
• Windosill
• Within the blade
• Worms Rumble
• Yoku's Island Express
• XCOM 2
• XEL
• X-Morph: Defense Complete Pack
• Youtubers Life
• Zombie Driver HD

 
Steam gifts list:

• Crash Drive 2
• FlatOut: Ultimate Carnage
• Frozen Synapse Prime
• Gods Will Be Watching
• ibb & obb
• Killing Floor (includes Defence Alliance 2)
• Marine Sharpshooter II: Jungle Warfare
• Onikira - Demon Killer
• Spacebase DF-9
• Takedown: Red Sabre
• The Witcher: Enhanced Edition
• TRISTOY

Battle report: R-02
Time: One day after the Galdush battle, day 21 since REC forces crossed to the other side
Report carried out by: Brigadier General Oscar Wayne
Report states: At noon of the 21st day the remains of the enemy seventh army engaged base Galdush. The attack was carried out by air forces, consisting of the enemy's seventh wyvern corp, and ground forces, consisting of the enemy's seventh siege legion. The wyverns came within roughly three miles from the base before the majority was taken out of the sky by AN/TWQ-2 missile systems, the rest either fled or stayed and were taken out via heavy machine gun fire. The siege legion was destroyed sooner by M155A2 self-propelled howitzers. The majority was eliminated, and remnants fled.
Outcome: Victory
REC casualties: None
Enemy casualties: Estimated 4.000 (Not including wyverns and hardware)
Identification sources: Captured general of the seventh army, Drannor Crax; Captured dwarven commander Dunan Oremelt.
(Twenty days after the Galdush battle)
Imperial palace, Elyana
"What is the meaning of this!?", Canus yelled in furious anger as he stood up from his throne.
"Your Majesty, I can explain.", Laeroth said standing in the center of the Grand chamber, surrounded by senators and the Chosen legions, "I was planning on informing you-"
"Inform me of what!? That the invasion force led by general Ylindar was destroyed in less than a day!? That the troops you sent to Galdush to stop the humans were also crushed!? That we lost nearly two hundred thousand forces, including two of our armies and generals, in less than one fucking moon cycle!?".
This was the first time anyone has seen Canus rage out like this. His whole life he was calm and collected, never raising his voice at anyone. Even if he did have an outburst, its magnitude was nowhere near the level of what the Grand chamber's attendants were experiencing at this moment. Laeroth had no words with which to defend himself and lying was beneath. He underestimated the enemy's capabilities. If they could do this, then he shuddered to imagine what they would do if they were given even more time. All he knew for sure was that a direct approach will undoubtedly lead to failure.
"Your Majesty.", Laeroth spoke, "I meant no disrespect. I only assumed that-"
"You assumed!? You do not assume, Laeroth. You determine! You bring solutions and results. In over three hundred cycles you never once assumed anything. What has changed? Are you losing your edge?"
"Your Majes-"
"Perhaps I should put someone else in charge.". These words shook Laeroth to the core. "Someone more youthful. Someone I can fully trust. Someone capable of cleaning this mess. Perhaps Athtar, maybe Reebus or Syndra. Or... maybe that fellow Alpharan."
"No!", Laeroth shouted, his voice booming over the halls, making everyone present twitch. He drew his sword and knelt, "I shall resolve this. I shall not fail you, Your Majesty.". He brought the edge of his sword to his left hand and without hesitation sliced off his smallest finger. Then he placed his sword on the floor and offered Canus his finger. Canus slowly walked over to him and took it.
After observing the finger for several moments, Canus spoke, "Rise.", and so Laeroth did, "This is your final chance. Should you fail me, you will lose more than this finger.". With a bow and a salute, Laeroth exited the chamber. "This meeting is over! Return to your duties!"
With that, the chamber was emptied and only Canus remained with his guard. Sitting on his throne, Canus observed Laeroth's finger. All he could do was hope and pray that Laeroth's determination would prevail.
As Laeroth walked down the halls he patched up his hand with cloth. His first captain walked beside him, "Sir! You must slow down."
"I cannot Helion!", Laeroth shouted, "Every minute we spend bickering is a minute we give to the enemy. Their power, their speed, it is like nothing we faced before."
"Well... What do we do? What can we do?"
"First we need to fortify the North Alston river. Send word to general Lyklor Balphine of the XI and general Reebus Octo of the XII. Tell them to hold the bridges and not let the enemy pass. Since they have powerful cannons, they need to spread their forces out and use long-range catapults. Second, send word to the Meilume nobility and tell them to leave the region. Third, bring me the captive humans as soon as possible. Where are they?"
"About a dozen have been scattered at the Meilume and Kuruk capitals. The rest are on their way to the other cities between Kuruk and Elyana and many will be sent to the mines of the Tubal mountains."
"I want eight captives here as soon as possible."
"Understood sir.". The captain saluted and rushed to his duties, leaving Laeroth who entered his personal chamber and grabbed his flask. After he emptied it he threw it to the corner of the room. Sitting down on his bed he caught his breath and stared at the spirit statues on his shelf and prayed, "Morto, I beg of you. Bring death upon these cursed enemies."
---
(Around the same time)
South village, Yellow forest county, Meilume
Nym will never forget what happened that day. His little crew swore that they would never tell anyone about it. That... man, if it can be called a man, terrified them. When they returned to their parents they lied about how they were running from ferals they saw in the forest while playing. This put the whole village on alert. Of course, it would, a danger of ferals attacking was normal. The whole forest had dens of feral welfen and leanoids, but the county didn't have the means with which to deal with the problem and the empire doesn't see them as a threat overall, so the counties were on their own.
The Yellow forest county had roughly eight thousand people living in it with roughly six hundred militia. It was small compared to some other counties but it held on all things considered. Some people wanted to leave the country as they feared it was becoming too dangerous due to feral activity, but recent events made them choose otherwise. Two massive armies marched near their forest and looking down from the hill the people could see them. The first one marched to the rift to get to the other side and the other after them to assist them. But they were all defeated. This frightened the people of Yellow forest, but they chose to stay, thinking that maybe the enemy won't enter their forest because of the ferals. A long shot, but one they chose to take.
Nym was outside with his friends. The sun was starting to set and they had to return home from mushroom picking. "We never should have gone there.", said Cohnal.
"Stop talking about it.", Nym said, "It's done, stop."
"He has a point, Nym.", Elsha said, "I don't know why that man let us go but... I don't ever want to see him again."
"Same here.", said Meara.
"And we won't have to.", Nym said, "As long as we don't tell anyone anything and we never go to Galdush, we will be fine."
The four of them nodded to that. What happened on that day scared them to the core. But it made them confused more than anything else. The passing imperial soldiers said how they were going to a savage land filled with barbaric monsters. But if that was true, then why did the men on Galdush spare them? Was it because they took no pleasure in killing children? One thing was for sure, they will heed their advice and stay away.
"I think we have enough.", Elsha said.
"Yes.", Hallas said, "We should probably return to the village before ferals show up."
"I don't think they will.", Nym said.
"What do you mean?", Meara asked.
"Haven't you noticed that we haven't seen any ferals in several moon cycles? It's like they ran away."
"That is strange.", Cohnal said, "But either way, we should hurry back."
The five of them started walking back. The forest is quite beautiful in the evening and at night. The reason why it's called Yellow forest is that in the late yellow season and all of the green season, the yellow-backed fireflies and red-headed beetles start flying at night and illuminate the whole forest with yellow and red dots. The county doesn't put up many torches in these times because the people love watching the red and yellow dance of insects. A few beetles have come out of the trees and this told the children they should hurry.
As they ran through the forest, Elsha stopped when she heard rustling in a nearby bush. Her curiosity got the better of her and she walked closer to the bush, despite Nym telling her not to. She walked closer and closer and when she got closer she noticed a pair of green eyes inside the bush. She realized immediately what it was and jumped back just before the creature jumped after her. It was a goblin. Short and bald with a big nose and ugly teeth it wore rags and held a crudely made spear. Elsha was backing away but she slipped and fell on her back. The goblin was about to stab her with his spear, but Nym jumped in and shanked it in the side, piercing its heart. Pulling out the knife he grabbed Elsha and the five of them started running back to the village. As they ran, goblins started jumping out of the bushes and shrubs. Dozens of them. The children could see the gate of the village.
"Open the gate!", Nym yelled as he dragged Elsha, "Goblins! Let us in!"
The guards quickly rushed to open the gate. They opened it just enough so the children could pass. One by one passed and Nym was about to cross but he was grabbed by the goblins. The goblin that grabbed him was taller and bulkier than the rest. He dragged Nym back and left as more goblins showed up. The children cried and the guards quickly closed the gate and climbed on the walls. They saw not dozens, but hundreds of goblins. How could there be so many, they couldn't know and there was no time to find out. The one hundred and fifty militia that were at the village armed themselves and prepared to fight. The goblins threw stones at them but the stone is not as strong as an arrow. The militia opened fire with bows and crossbows, killing dozens of them. The larger goblins threw larger stones and even smaller goblins at the wall. A few made it over and some landed on the militia and started stabbing them. One militia fighter used his sword to slice their heads off and grabbed the crossbow of a fallen fighter and shot the larger goblin in the head, killing him and letting his disgusting, bloated hunk of flesh flop on the ground.
"Aim for the large ones first!", he shouted, "I need spears on the edges, they are climbing! Burn them, they hate fire!". He continued to kill more goblins, slicing the heads of the ones who climbed up on the wall's edges. In front, he could see how a section was overwhelmed as the large goblins threw smaller ones at the militia. He grabbed a nearby shield and charged at them, knocking several down and letting the forces on the ground deal with them. As he looked down he saw the last six large goblins grab a log and he immediately understood their role. "Prepare the torches! Grab cloth!". The fighters did just that and threw the burning cloth and torches at the goblins as they hit the gate with their log.
As the battle went on, the militia killed dozens of goblins with volleys of arrows but more just kept coming. They could see the end though, there were no more large goblins and the small ones had organized a suicide charge to overwhelm the wall, but the fighters kept throwing fire and shooting them with arrows. As this was happening, however, something was happening in the village. The people were all in their homes, but a few were still helping the militia fight as they treated their wounds and brought arrows, food, and boiling water. One of them heard something coming from the abandoned well and moved closer to see. When he got closer he peaked in and a green hand grabbed him as another one stabbed him in the throat. From the good goblins came, several of them, then a few dozen. They went into homes and people started screaming. Elsha was in one of the homes, and her grandmother was laying in the corner when a goblin walked towards her, but Elsha took a knife and stabbed it in the head. From her door, she could see more of them running towards her. She was scared but relieved as more militia came. They were from the western village of the county and had come as soon as they could. The fighters went into the homes and started killing the goblins. Chopping off heads, stabbing hearts and lungs, firing crossbows, burning, the militia used everything.
Eventually, the goblins inside the village were all killed and the fires were put out. The goblins outside the wall were mostly dead but nearly a hundred fled. This was a dark night. The south militia lost nearly a third of its force and dozens of people were killed by the goblins from the well, which was covered up with wooded planks and stone. But the damage to the hearts and minds of the people was greater. Mothers mourned their children and children their fathers. Their greatest fear was the goblins coming back.
(The next day)
Everyone looked to the wall defender, Tulgor, the commander of the south militia. They hoped he would have an answer to all this, and so did he. Some wanted revenge, many asked what to do next. Truth is, he didn't know what to do. Something like this never occurred and no one thought it was possible.
"Tulgor.", spoke an elderly elf, "What do you think we should do?"
"I... I do not know, elder.", Tulgor replied, making everyone around them lower their heads in grief, "We could send fighters down the well and see what is down there. It could be their den and if so they are asleep. But I cannot be certain what we will face. If we get cornered we would die. Besides, we do not have the means with which to destroy the den."
"So all that remains is for us to prepare for the next attack?"
"I fear so. And since we do not know where they will attack next, I suggest we inform the mayor to declare a state of alert county-wide, as to prevent further surprises and death."
"Very well. I will personally go to the central hall and-"
"Tulgor!", shouted a militia fighter, "Tulgor! You have to see this."
Tulgor quickly stood up, "What is it? Have the goblins awoken?"
"No. But... I don't know. You must come, they call for you."
"Call for me? Who? Imperial soldiers?"
"No. They are soldiers, but they are wearing green armor and have boomsticks. They're not dwarves, they are too tall and their skin is paler than theirs is."
This greatly confused Tulgor, "Did they say where they are from?"
"Yes. They are from Galdush."
This statement made his heart freeze and the people around him panicked. The enemy from Galdush came here? Why? Have they come to kill them and take their land? Why here, this is a small county. Swallowing the spit that worked up in his mouth he spoke, "How many?"
"I counted only a dozen. But I think there are more in their armored carriages."
"Assemble fifty of our finest. I will meet them."
---
(Earlier)
Operations base Galdush, morning
It's been a while since any attacks have been launched at them and REC got to work. They improved their base, finishing the machine shop, barracks, airstrip, fortifications, and central command. The base was taking shape of a polygonal fort. The reason is that, historically, these types of fortifications were the best defenses against cannon fire until more accurate and powerful forms of artillery were created. But since the highest level of military technology possessed by the enemy is that of the Napoleonic era, it's not an issue. The other benefit is that polygonal forts are built in a way so that the point which needed to be defended is in the middle. This way the rift is in the center and defended on all sides. As an extra precaution, the rift was surrounded by a steel dome with a garrison defending it.
After the full thirty thousand troops made it to the other side of the rift, a few reforms were made. Firstly, all equipment that required a satellite link was not to be used as they had no satellites here. Instead, they used drones until a proper system can be emplaced. Secondly, a squad of four distinct tribals will be accompanying all Rift groups, or RGs, in order to spread the word to the other tribals of North Altia in hopes of bringing more people to the US's side and also showing them why they are not monsters.
There were currently five RGs and each was given an assignment. They were to go to various locations in Meilume and do reconnaissance as well as gain contact with locals and find out more about the imperial government. Each RG was a platoon of thirty-eight rangers from the 75th Ranger regiment led by a first lieutenant and was equipped with standard hardware. Since the end of the Great crisis, Russia and the US have been working on the 'Warrior' project in order to create better gear for soldiers. The result was a helmet, body armor, a one-piece coverall, hearing protection; protective glasses; a protective set for knees and elbows; new grenade launchers, submachine guns, assault rifles, sniper rifles, ammunition, a combat knife, as well as 24/7 reconnaissance means, a day and night sighting system, a small-size binocular, optical and thermal weapon sights, etc. As well as these, the system comprises a universal shelter, a multifunctional knife, a signal lamp, a watch, winter and summer two-side camouflage sets, an autonomous heat source, a backpack, an individual water filter, a small entrenching tool, breath protection devices, means of radiological and chemical control, a medical kit, and filtering clothes. As for vehicles, each RG has two JLTV3s, two International MaxxPros, and one LAV-40, all armed and ready.
With their assignments given, the rangers got to work. RG-2, led by lieutenant Andrea Williams, was to track down the elven children Spearteam found snooping. The group tracked them down to a nearby place designated Yellow forest. They took a path through the forest and hoped to run into their village. On the way, they admired the environment. The green trees, the clear blue sky, and the animals looked like the ones back on Earth, just with a few distinct features. Like how rabbits have longer legs, foxes have brighter eyes, some even have two tails. Everything was truly fascinating.
"Man this place is beautiful.", said sergeant David Hall, "It's like driving through a national park."
"You said it, Dave.", said sergeant Greg Nivera, "What do you think we'll find here?"
"Man, I'm hoping for some griffons or something."
"Griffons are only in the north.", said Xod, the leanoid, "If we ever get to the dwarven kingdoms we might find one."
"That's a bummer.", Greg said.
"Bummer?", asked Zog, the welfen.
"It means it's a bad thing.", David said.
"Why is that a bad thing?"
"Because I really wanted to see one!", Greg said.
"Quiet.", said Andrea over the comms, "You forgot to turn off the radio."
"Sorry ma'am.", said Greg as he turned the radio off.
"Boys.", said Andrea in the lead JLTV, "Let's find these kids."
"I just hope we don't scare them.", said sergeant Sophia Adams, "I'd hate to make a bad first impression."
"These people live in the Yellow forest.", said Madia the lepian, "It's likely that they know about the Galdush battle and they consider you as an enemy. I wouldn't expect them to greet you with 'open arms' as you say it."
"I don't expect that either.", said Andrea, "But that's why we're here. We have to show them that they don't have to fear us. "
Ksee, the feelian, scoffed at that, "You should use your cannons and destroy them. It's what they deserve anyway."
"We won't be the monsters they say we are. There can be another way. Besides, it's the army and the emperor along with the other stuck-up nobility that's the problem. I'm not gonna kill farmers 'cause a bureucrat attacked me."
Ksee thought about that. She saw what the Americans were capable of, and yet she couldn't understand why they don't just force the elves into submission. As they drove through the forest, they came across another path that led deeper into the woods. The tracker led them there and so they followed it. It was amazing how many things the human soldiers were capable of doing, unlike the elves who only knew how to kill in several different ways. The vehicles moved through the woods and reached a wooden wall about roughly twenty feet tall that looked like it saw action recently. They followed the tracker and found it on the ground in front of the gate.
'What happened here?', Andrea thought as she picked up the tracker.
"Hold it!", shouted someone from the wall. It was an elf and around him about twenty more with bows and crossbows pointed at Andrea, "Who are you?"
Andrea calmly stepped forward, "I am lieutenant Andrea Williams of Rift group 2 from the Rift Expeditionary Corp!". This seemed to confuse them.
"Where are you from?", he asked.
"Galdush."
This made them tense up. They seemed angered. "You are the enemy! Why have you come?!". The rangers aimed their guns at them but Andrea waved for them to calm down.
"We are here to speak with your leader. We only want to make peaceful relations."
"You lie! The imperial army told us that they were heading to Galdush to face the enemy that has come to invade our lands! Thousands went and only hundreds returned! That was your doing!"
"Those soldiers attacked us first. They sent their army through the rift and killed thousands of innocent people. We are here to peacefully solve any and all problems with the empire, but we need your help."
"Why should I trust you?"
In response, Andrea gave her gun to Greg, took off her helmet, and widened her arms, "I mean you no harm!". After some hesitation, one of the elves climbed down from the wall.
"Wait there!".
So the team waited. Some were skeptical about this but did nothing. David walked up to Andrea, "Are you sure about this lieutenant? You really think they're gonna even consider talking to us?"
"All I know is they could've shot us on sight. Do you want to kill hundreds of people today, sergeant?". In that moment, the gate opened and an elf followed by fifty more stepped out. The fifty made a defensive line of shields, which tensed up the rangers.
"No, but if this keeps up I might have to.", David said.
The leading elf stepped forward, "I am Tulgor Salvin, commander of the south militia."
Andrea stepped forward, "I am lieutenant Andrea Williams, commander of RG-2 of the Rift Expeditionary group."
"Why have you come, Lieutenant Andrea Williams?"
"As I stated before, we are here to make peaceful relations with the elven people. We mean you no harm."
"You misunderstood my question. Why are you here, specifically?"
"We are here because we want to prove to you that we are not monsters and savages that the empire claims us to be. We only desire peace."
"You keep saying that word. Peace. And yet you kill dozens of thousands if not hundreds of thousands of soldiers."
"Those soldiers attacked us first. You can't blame us for defending ourselves."
"True. Still, how do I know you won't stab us in the back? I see the tribals behind you. You make them fight for you, so how do I know you will not enslave us as well."
"We are not slaves!", Xod shouted, making the fighters twitch, "We chose to fight alongside these humans because we are tired of the empire enslaving and killing us! We fight with them because they promised us freedom! With them, not for them!"
This made Tulgor raise an eyebrow, "Is that really true?"
"Yes.", Andrea said, "We want to end slavery and show you that there is a better way. So if you want to fight them, you'll have to fight us. And I assure you, it will be bloody.". The fighters and rangers tensed up, ready for a fight. But Tulgor laughed.
"Never before have I met a woman with such ferociousness and authority.", he said, "You have my respect. However, if you want my trust, you must offer me more than words."
"And what is it that you want?"
Tulgor thought for a while before answering, "There is a certain goblin problem we are facing."
"Goblin problem?"
"Last night, a horde of goblins attacked us and I lost many fighters. I sense that they will come back but I cannot search for them and leave the village undefended."
"Interesting. Do you have any leads? Or a hunch as to where they are?"
"They came from the forest but it stretches for many leagues. They did however come from an abandoned well."
This caught Andrea's attention, "Very well. But my soldiers will have to enter your village."
"I shall allow half of your men and two carriages."
"Alright.", she turned to the group, "Hall, Adams, bring half the group, one JLTV3, and one MRAP. Madia, Ksee, you're coming too, the rest stay here."
The group organized and entered the village. All the people stared at them and their vehicles, like something otherworldly, which they technically were. They came to the abandoned well and Andrea gave the order to prepare the RC drone and the flyer. The rangers removed the wood and stone from the well and started lowering the drone.
"What is that?", Tulgor asked.
"It's a device we can use to see what's inside the well without going in there.", Andrea answered, "And that one can fly."
"Amazing. How?"
"A long story. I might show you sometime."
The drone was lowered to the bottom and a private drove it. He had to turn on night vision to see. "It looks like a tunnel.", he said, "They probably dug their way in there. You got anything?"
"Nothing yet.", said the other private, "Hold on. I think I see a cave. Yeah, definitely. The entrance is above ground level."
"Goblins are night dwellers.", Tulgor said, "They sleep during the day and hate fire. A cave is where they prefer to live. But to think they would dig their way to our well. I knew they were on a tribal level but this."
"Don't compare us to those monsters, elf.", said Madia.
"Why? They also kidnap people and force-mate with them."
"We only do it when we need to!"
"Calm down!", shouted Andrea, "We had an agreement."
"Ma'am, come look at this.", said a private, and Andrea, Tulgor, and Sophia gathered, "I see dozens of them, sleeping, maybe more further out. And here. It's a boy."
"That is the boy they took last night.", Tulgor said, "He still lives."
"Someone has to go down there and get him.", Andrea said, "Ksee?"
"Why me?", Ksee asked.
"You are the most flexible one. Plus, that's an order."
Ksee groaned but accepted. The private pulled the drone back and tied the rope to her. She was lowered down and then crawled through the tunnel, ignoring the stench on the way. Finally, she came to the cave and looked around, her cat eyes allowing her to see clearly. She saw the boy, who was a little battered but breathing and alive. She slowly grabbed him under the arms but he woke up and started freaking out. This woke up a few goblins and Ksee grabbed the boy and ran back, quickly going back through the tunnel.
She tied the rope around him, "Pull him up!". As they pulled the boy up she could see the goblins approaching, "They're coming!"
"Take this!", Andrea shouted, throwing a frag grenade at her.
"What is it?", Ksee asked.
"Just pull the ring, throw it, and then climb!"
Ksee did just that. After she pulled the pin she threw it at the approaching goblins who grabbed it out of curiosity. A curiosity that would have them killed as the grenade exploded, killing several goblins and blocking the path to Ksee. After Ksee and the boy climbed out, the soldiers rejoiced.
"Please don't make me do that again.", Ksee said.
Andrea chuckled, "No promises."
Ksee saw the boy run to his mother and friends, who cried tears of joy. This made her smile. Tulgor walked over to her and slightly bowed, "Thank you for saving one of my own."
"Don't mention it.", Ksee said, "It was a piece of cake."
Tulgor was confused by that statement, "Cake? There is no cake here."
Ksee laughed a little, "Don't worry about it. The humans taught me, I was a little confused myself."
Greg walked over as he put away his radio, "Ok, it's done. I gave the location to command, they're sending a platoon with flamethrowers to deal with the cave."
"How-", Tulgor began to ask.
"Another device.", Greg said, "We have a lot of them."
Tulgor chuckled, "I see. Thank you, humans. I suppose we can trust you after all. Come, let me introduce you to the elder."
End of chapter 7
​
---
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Last Updated List: 30/03/2023
I have quite a few games up for trade or willing to sell.
Primarily looking for games from my wishlist. Not a reseller, so please do not offer any games which I already have, not interested. Other than that feel free to offer your list of Steam games and something I may not have and fulfills my criteria I could/would be willing to trade for it/them.
If you're either trading or buying please state the game(s) you are interested in and your offer (game(s)/list/money).
 
Few things to note:

• To make a trade you must respond to this thread first, I will not respond or accept anyone outside of this thread.
• Some titles I have more than one copy of, is also listed as such, same for any DLC and non-steam games.
• Not interested in any keys from an unofficial retailesource (aka grey market), curatoreviewer keys (aka beta/reviewebeta-testing), and not interested in anything other than Steam games.
• Also not interested in; abandonware, keys for games that are already free on Steam itself, Steam profile-limited keys, and only slight interest in VR-titles and/or de-listed games.
• When buying, I only accept payments in Euro's. Fees are on buyer.

 
Info:

• Region (and keys region): Europe
  
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I kindly ask of you is to be reasonable when making offers to make it a fair trade for both of us.
Let's have a good exchange/trade!
 
NEWLY ADDED:

• Forgive Me Father
• Impaler
• Propnight
• The Citadel
• Viscerafest
• Wrath: Aeon of Ruin

 
List of games:

• 16bit Trader
• 4089: Ghost Within
• 911 Operator
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• Afterparty
• Alien Breed 2: Assault
• Amnesia: Rebirth
• Ampersat
• Anomaly II
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• Cats in Time
• Caveblazers
• Chicago 1930 : The Prohibition
• Children of Morta
• Close to the Sun
• Cobra Kai: The Karate Kid Saga Continues
• Commandos: Behind Enemy Lines
• Company of Heroes 2
• Company of Heroes 2 - Ardennes Assault
• Company of Heroes 2 - The Western Front Armies: Oberkommando West
• Company of Heroes: Tales of Valor
• Cook Serve Delicious
• Cook, Serve, Delicious! 3?!
• Crash Drive 2
• Crazy Machines 3
• CryoFall
• Curse: The Eye of Isis
• Cybercube
• Danger Scavenger
• Dear Esther: Landmark Edition
• Death Squared
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• Farming Simulator 17
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• Ken Follett's The Pillars of the Earth
• King Arthur Collection (Sub ID 25825)
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• Orbital Racer
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• Party Hard 2
• Pathfinder: Kingmaker - Enhanced Plus Edition (Region Lock: EU-only: Sub ID)
• PAYDAY 2
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• PC Building Simulator
• Pizza Connection 3
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• Police Stories
• POSTAL 2
• POSTAL 2: Paradise Lost (DLC)
• QUAKE II
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• Red Faction Guerrilla Re-Mars-tered
• Red Faction: Armageddon
• Red Solstice 2: Survivors
• Remnants of Naezith
• Resident Evil 4 (2005)
• Ring Runner Flight of the Sages
• River City Ransom: Underground
• Rock ‘N’ Roll Defense
• Rogue Heroes: Ruins of Tasos
• Rustler
• S.W.I.N.E. HD Remaster
• Serious Sam Classics: Revolution
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• Shadow Tactics: Blades of the Shogun
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• Shape of the World
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• Sid Meier's Ace Patrol
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• Sigma Theory: Global Cold War
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• SONG OF HORROR COMPLETE EDITION
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• Strange Brigade
• Streets of Fury EX
• Streets of Fury EX
• Strider
• Stygian: Reign of the Old Ones
• SuchArt: Genius Artist Simulator (wishlist or Paypal only)
• Sunlight
• Super Magbot
• Super Meat Boy
• Surfingers
• Swag and Sorcery
• Switchball HD
• Syberia
• Syberia II
• The Amazing American Circus
• The Beast Inside
• The Citadel
• The Dark Eye: Memoria
• The Dream Machine: Chapter 1 & 2
• The eXceed Collection: Aural Brutality Edition
• The Falconeer
• The Inner World
• Ticket to Ride
• The Invisible Hours
• The Quarry – Horror History Visual Filter Pack (DLC)
• The Sexy Brutale
• The Smurfs - Mission Vileaf
• The Town of Light
• This War of Mine
• Those Who Remain
• Those Who Remain
• Timberman
• Time Lock VR
• Titan Quest Anniversary Edition
• Toejam & Earl: Back in the Groove
• Totally Reliable Delivery Service
• Tower 57
• Tower of Time
• Train Simulator Classic + 2 DLCs
• Tropico 3 Gold Edition
• Tropico 4 Collector's Bundle
• Unshaded
• Verdun
• Violett Remastered
• Wargroove
• Warhammer 40,000: Space Wolf
• Warhammer: End Times - Vermintide
• Where The Water Tastes Like Wine
• Windosill
• Within the blade
• Worms Rumble
• Yoku's Island Express
• XCOM 2
• XEL
• X-Morph: Defense Complete Pack
• Youtubers Life
• Zombie Driver HD

 
Steam gifts list:

• Crash Drive 2
• FlatOut: Ultimate Carnage
• Frozen Synapse Prime
• Gods Will Be Watching
• ibb & obb
• Killing Floor (includes Defence Alliance 2)
• Marine Sharpshooter II: Jungle Warfare
• Onikira - Demon Killer
• Spacebase DF-9
• Takedown: Red Sabre
• The Witcher: Enhanced Edition
• TRISTOY

A screw top corona. Not my first choice, but handed to me cold, so I wasn’t going to decline. An apartment party is not somewhere that I ventured too often, but I had just gotten back in town after a 4-month bender abroad, an annoying sentence, I know. Being apart from my friends, I was willing to oblige to their desired evening of fun. Drinking was not atop my priority list, but I was happy to be back with the crew.
It was summer in a sleepy college town. Not a lot to do and not a lot of places to find trouble, so to the apartment party we went, my half empty corona in hand.
Peter and I had met on Halloween 6 months prior to this evening. There was an instant connection. I have never cry laughed more or felt more myself than when I’m with him. Everyone loved Peter. What’s not to love? He made everyone feel like a friend, funny and witty, welcoming, and kind. Once I got to know him on a deeper level, I quickly realized that there was a sad part of him, and I think that is why we connected so well. We were the life of the party, but sad inside to no one’s wiser. We never talked about it, but I know one another’s company made us both feel at home. I quickly knew that I wanted this friendship to last forever. A week after we met, I knew I would have to let him know that I was not romantically interested in him so we could get on with being friends. At 22, a boy doesn’t want to hear that. Now, some 10 years later, he is thankful for the decision I made for us all those years ago. My older brother, my safe space.
Peter liked to party. It was not odd to go to a party with one another and end the night, separated (and by separated, I mean, Peter getting too drunk and leaving a party with out telling anyone or getting kicked out of a bar). We always found our way back to each other the next morning. Breakfast and a gossip session over the events of the night before.
You can hear the music and the beer pong from the ground floor. Peter and I enter the buzzing apartment. I immediately see an old friend that I have not seen since I’ve returned. I am elated. I run over to Thomas and smoother him in the biggest hug imaginable. His face lights up, shocked to see me. We hold up in a corner, laughing and swapping stories from the semester. Thomas and I have had every single class together since freshman year. Our classroom friendship, turned study buddies, turned into a real-life friendship outside of the hallways and the late-night papers. One of the most genuine people I had during college. I was so happy to be reunited. We had so much to catch up on.
Thomas was shy. He never had a ton to say, which is why we got along so well, I can’t shut up, and he’s a great listener. I think he liked how I just forced my friendship onto him, he didn’t really have a say in the matter. We were spending so much of our academic hours together, which made me want to be friends all of the time. He didn’t seem opposed, and we’ve been friends ever since. The extrovert adopts the introvert, a true match made.
I feel a tap on my shoulder. It’s a familiar face from freshman year. Matt. He was friends with some of my older friends. Nice guy, weird he was at this party. Hasn’t he graduated? I thought to myself.
“Sadie, how to hell are you girl”? he screamed into my ear as he embraced me. Matt was an enthusiastic guy. Happy about everything, until he got too drunk, and enthusiasm turned into extremely annoying, very quickly. We exchanged small talk, until we were approached by another figure.
“Chad, what the fuck is up man, come here. Do you know Sadie? Greatest girl on earth, you have to meet her”?! Matt yelled as he embraced Chad. I knew Chad. He had messaged me while I was away for the semester. A random message, considering I had been at my university for 3.5 years and never heard of him until his Instagram DM. I chalked it up to him hearing about my recent break up. It’s a small town, the dating pool is subpar, and we ran in different circles. I put two and two together, Thomas and Matt are in the same frat, and I’m now learning that that is how Chad fits into this circle. We spoke a couple times while I was away, nothing serious, and left it at “see ya around”. I guess “around” was happening right now.
“I am hopping to get to know her a lot more” Chad smirked. Matt turned to me and continued to tell me about awesome Chas is and how crazy it was that our paths have never crossed.
Everyone knew the answer to that. I had dated the same guy all of college, and up until a few months ago, I didn’t know who the cute, single guys were on campus. I quickly learned that Chad, was one of them. Maybe this was my chance to have a little fun as I entered my senior year. I was going to have an easy year and after a very bad break up, no strings attached fun was exactly what I needed.
“Let me get you a drink” Chad suggested. That’s right, my corona. I had finished it on the ride over here and was too busy talking with Thomas to get another. Chad appeared with a red solo cup of what he called “the house drink”. I took the half-filled cup and took a sip. It tasted like every other party juice that college kids make. Likely an entire bottle of cheap brunettes’ vodka and whatever juice they had in the fridge. I now find myself in another corner, completely enchanted with Chad.
I don’t know how much time has passed; I tell him I need to use the restroom. I push past the crowd of strangers and dodge flying ping pong balls. I find myself in a bathroom. I look at myself in the mirror. Am I having a good time? I ask myself with a smile. It’s been almost 4 years of college and the bad times have unfortunately clouded my memories of the fun times. At 21 years old, I find myself struggling with dark, overwhelming emotions that I have absolutely no idea how to navigate. It’s refreshing to be sober and having fun, especially with a cute boy. I kind of want to go home with Chad? If that’s what this leads to, I think as I wash my hands and reapply my lip gloss. He’s a 22 year old guy, of course he wants me to come home with him. I’ve never done that before. Gone home with someone I barley know? It’s college, I’m single, this is exactly what I can and want to do I think to myself as I place the lip gloss back into my bag.
Anyway, I need to get back out there. I toss the gross rag back onto the counter. Give my hair a fluff and open the door. Thomas is standing right outside the door as I open it. “Stop talking to him” he whispers to me. “What”? I screamed over the blaring music. Thomas mumbles when he’s been drinking so I have no idea what he’s getting on about. “That guy is bad news, just warning you” he says looking at me with the coldest stare he’s ever given. Thomas has never had an opinion on my dating or social life, ever. That’s the best thing about our friendship. It’s just a fun, healthy, no bad energy kind of flow. We don’t talk boys or girls and we can just be ourselves with each other. Hearing him say something about Chad is odd. “He’s nice, we’re just talking” I assure him and prance back to my corner.
I always wonder how different my life would be if Thomas was a girl. If a girlfriend told me to be worried about a guy and not talk to them, I would listen. I would have never gone back over to that guy. I trust my girlfriends with my life. In that moment, I thought Thomas was drunk and crushing on me and didn’t like seeing me with a guy that he deemed to be a “douche bag”. I always wonder if Matt didn’t see me that night, would Chad have even approached us talking. I always wonder if Peter didn’t want to go out that night, I would have never ended up in the apartment. I always wonder if I didn’t take a drink of that juice and vodka, the events of that night would have played out differently. I can’t ask myself those questions these days. I don’t handle “what ifs” very well.
I get back to my corner. I’m feeling flushed. It’s probably the juice in the drink, I’ve never liked a sweet drink. Makes my head hurt. Chad is almost as charming as I think I am. My charm comes in the form of sarcasm and dancing around the line of just being mean. Boys love that.
“I’m having a great time, I don’t even care that we’re at this party, do you want to maybe come back to my place and keep talking? I just live down the street” Chad leans into me closer as he asks with the most soft but confident tone. I don’t even think before I answer, an excited “Yes” slips from my glossed lips.
“My roommate is here actually; he doesn’t drink so he can drive us”. His roommate appears out of thin air, like he was a fly on the wall, waiting for his cue. It's like he had it planned.
I don’t tell Peter and Thomas I’m leaving. The last thing I want to hear from them is all the reasons I shouldn’t. I scan the room; Peter isn’t even in the apartment. Classic. Thomas must be in the room I left him in, I don’t say bye. I take Chad’s hand and we’re getting in his roommates’ car. He sits in the back with me, even though there isn’t a 4th person coming with us. I think it’s odd, making your roommate be your driver? I don’t think about it again. I’m dizzy. It’s probably the car, I do get car sick.
The roommate jumps out of the car before the head lights even turn off and heads inside, it’s like he was trying to run away from us. Again, odd. Maybe he’s just an awkward guy. We get up to his second-floor apartment. It’s a typical boy apartment. The TV to couch ratio is off and there are empty whiskey bottles lining the top of the kitchen counters. I roll my eyes.
Why am I here? My heart is racing out of my chest. I feel like I could run a marathon but, I can barely keep my eyes open. I’ve never felt like this before. I don’t even remember the car ride over here? Which is strange, considering I had 1 corona 2 hours ago and half a class of juicy vodka over the last hour. I keep doing “drink math” in head as it spins in circles. Trying to understand why this blanket of fog and discomfit comes over so quickly. I don’t want to get sick, how embarrassing would that be? Especially in front of this cute guy that I’ve just met.
He walks me into his room. We’re kissing. That’s fine. I sit down on the bed, his palms grabbing either side of my face. I’m good with that. I pull back, “I don’t want to have sex” I said nervously. I’m up front, I wanted him to know that that’s not why I came back here. I just wanted to see how things were, just the two of us. “Then we don’t have to” he smiled as he went back to kissing me.
Darkness. I can’t see anything. I know things are happening, I couldn’t tell you exactly what. Are my eyes even open? I’m trying to open them. I’m trying to talk. I can’t hear myself. It’s like all motor functions just slipped away without me knowing. Like I’m a baby that wants to communicate but can only make a few sounds. I can’t get my point across. It’s extremely frustrating. I can’t even tell if I can move my arms. Panic sets in. I hear an exhausted “NO” escape my lips. I think? I hope.
Darkness. I don’t know how much time has passed. Am I coming in and out of consciousness? I don’t even know what that feeling is like, I’ve never experienced what’s happening to me before. I’m in a bathroom? Why? I look up and see myself in the mirror. I’m naked. I tilt my head up a little further and I see him, behind me, naked as well.
He’s Inside of me. I realize what is happening.
Why are we in the bathroom? Did you need to watch me in the mirror? Did I run in here and you followed me to continue what you had started in the darkness.
“NO, get off me” finally. I heard that. It was loud. Good. I run back into the room. Why are my clothes off? Where is my purse? God why do I always wear so much jewelry, it’s everywhere. I can buy new stuff. No, this is new stuff, get it off the floor. I toss myself together, shoes and bag in hand. I run.
Darkness.
I’m on the phone.
Darkness.
Now, I’m in a car.
Darkness.
Now, I’m swallowing a pill, eating a taco, drinking water out of a glass, and laying in Monica’s bed. She seems very stressed out. How did I get here? I asked myself as I examine my familiar surroundings.
The next morning, we treated it like a normal morning.
Monica was my best friend. Looking back at our friendship, she was more like a mother. A mother with attachment issues. She was in and out of relationships or flings, always obsessing over the ex she dumped. She was an only child, selfishness came natural to her. She was only a couple years older than me. I thought she hung the moon. I had never had a friendship like this before. We were rarely apart. After my break up, I basically lived with Monica. I would have done anything for her, and to be honest, at that moment in time, she would have done anything for me. it’s the only time I had ever felt like she truly cared about me.
Peter and Jake met Monica and I at breakfast. Over the past 6 months, the 4 of us did everything together. We were the life of every party. They were the ying to our yang. This breakfast however, was not like our normal Sunday hungover gossip sessions.
“Are you going to tell them or should I”? Monica blurted out once we all got our drinks. I felt the redness flush over my cheeks. I couldn’t say that word. I couldn’t tell Peter what happened. I couldn’t look him in the eyes. I didn’t even want to tell Monica what happened. She told me she found me in a parking lot of an apartment building that we had never even been to before. She knew. I didn’t have to say anything. I wanted it to vanish out of my memory. I could barley remember anything so if I continued to push it out of my brain, it would be gone like a dream sooner rather than later.
I don’t remember the rest of that breakfast. I don’t remember the rest of that summer. If we’re being honest, looking back, I don’t remember most of college. It’s like that one night triggered something so dark inside of me that it erased everything from my memory. They call it trauma in therapy, but I call it protection.
Of course, I remember things here and there. Funny stories, my walks to class. But conversations, nights out with friends, the day-to-day life of what was supposed to be the greatest 4 years of your life was magically gone.
Not only did it trigger something dark inside of me, but it altered every cell in my body. The extrovert became an introvert. I couldn’t speak with a man with out a chip on my shoulder. I was moody and tired and completely unamused with everything. It’s like a was making poor decisions in my life on purpose because I was addicted to the pain and suffering. Sadness and shame were my new normal. I didn’t want to be happy, that felt like way too much work. I was good at being miserable.
I stayed like this for almost 3 years. I graduated, moved to a new city, made new friends, continued to make awful choices, got into another toxic relationship that wasn’t even a relationship and pushed away a lot of people. Monica and I had our inevitable break up. Thomas was still back in our college town, I didn’t see him often. Peter moved to the west coast the month before I moved to the east coast. An entire country apart. He still came to visit me. He checked on me. We missed each other so much, I know it hurt us both, but we would never tell each other. A simple “miss you” even though I knew it was more than that. I needed him. I needed someone there that loved me like I used to love myself.