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Having friends is fun and all, but dear god most people can’t plan for shit. If you want to go out and do something that requires being somewhere at a specific time then send a heads up more than 10 damn minutes before we’re supposed to be somewhere.
I used to be so desperate for friends when I was younger and was ok with last minute plans, but I also never had any other obligations outside my shitty part-time jobs. As I get older and my schedule gets busier with school and work obligations doing things by myself has become much more appealing than when I was younger. Just felt I needed to vent and idk where else to post this.

I have no knowledge of cars except the absolute basics, I got a job at AutoZone where they told me they'll help teach me but I feel like I'm barely learning, is there anything you guys recommend I do to accelerate my knowledge of cars? Maybe a course, a website, some learning game or whatever

Left a city job 5 years ago with a little over 8 years of service. Have about $84k accumulated contributions with interest (ACWI) left vested in the pension.
When I've run the calculations it would amount to $1k/month for life with survivor benefits continuing for my spouse for life. I can start withdrawing at 62, am 40 now. Have not accounted for inflation.
If I die before I retire, my spouse will get a lump sum payout of my ACWI because I have <10 years of service.
Interest on contributions prior to 12/31/2011 is 5.75%. Most of my contributions were post 2011 and get less, with my total annual average interest being 3.1-3.3%.
Should I roll this account over to an IRA to start working on better returns? Is the $1k/month in retirement worth it? Appreciate any advice/perspective.

So many people I’ve met are convinced that they are better than you because they went to X school and you went to school Y. They genuinely think they’re smarter than you and will get a better paying job. It drives me up a f**king wall.
My family doesn’t have a lot of money and I have a lot of siblings, so there’s even less to go around. We worked our butts off in high-school so we could go to college, and when the time came we decided to save money and go to our local state school, but everyone else I knew went to expensive brand name schools and everyone thought they were better than everyone else for doing so. I’m no genius, but I got a decent head on my shoulders and I work hard, and kids who were dumb as bricks were now acting like they were smartebetter than me because their parents paid X amount of money for them to go to some obscure school halfway across the country you’ve never even heard of. And they’re convinced that even with equivalent majors and grades, their degree is still worth more than mine because of where they went to school. Don’t get me wrong, going to Harvard or Yale definitely speaks to your achievements, but other than the handful of ivy league schools out there, no one cares which one of the 4000+ universities in the US you went to.
Funny story, I recently crossed paths with one of those pretentious people from high school, and they’re attending a private school in the city 20mins from my local college. Turns out we’re taking the same exact course with the same Professor. Same assignments and everything, my syllabus even still has their university name printed at the top. I’m getting an A, and they’re barely passing. I’m now tutoring him. I figured out that this isn’t the only case, half of my professors teach the same exact course at a handful of universities in the state. This discovery blew this kids mind, and he can’t come to terms that we’re somehow equal.
Edit: grammar

Hi all! So it's been a while. I was institutionalized following a failed attempt, put on meds, did outpatient treatment for a year THEN my therapist died - I stopped medication for 6 months then I suffered a "stress induced" blackout - tried therapy again for about 3 sessions and I've been rawdogging life ever since. That was 2 years ago.
So since then I've gotten really self aware with my moods, my emotions, my episodes and how to 'manage' them. A lot changed - went from surviving to living (toxic positivity gets the job done sometimes) but I was numb.
I couldn't cry, for close to year. Even when I was in the thick of the shit - that little moment before I couldn't recondition the terrible feeling away, I couldn't cry - nothing. The really good moments were just okay.
Until the past 3 weeks. Where I went from breaking down in tears out of the blue in an office meeting at 9am to having the literal time of my life at festivals and parties with other people and by myself and I mean I was euphoric - like that moment was the happiest I've ever and will ever be & if that is so I will be okay because I had the time of my life.
This past week, I was not well(flu)and not going to work. Wednesday I was preparing to go back into the office and I got triggered by the tiniest non -issue and a had a full breakdown.
By that I mean fetal position, rolling panick attacks that lasted around 10hours and I went mute. I haven't had panick attacks that severe ever and only a few in the past 3 years. The last time I went mute was 5/6 years ago.
I went to the riverside when the attacks ended.... rationalized and explained everything that happened (to myself)- I thought about committing myself to the psych ward for a bit & let that thought go. Thursday, I spent half the day at the office in a constant state of panick/anxiety then found out my beloved friend lost his battle with depression and I went to Karaoke.
At Karaoke, I had THE TIME OF MY LIFE. And I was really sad and terribly drunk - I was feeling EVERYTHING! my emotions, everybody's emotions - I cried to my ex who broke my heart terribly and after I cried in his arms because I was sad my friend died and I was feeling so much... I was okay. Like I have never felt sadness before in my life. I let a stranger walk me to my car, I got home, slept and woke up to find I had wet the bed.
And I spent a shit ton of money at karaoke.
But I'm okay now. The sadness of my friends death comes in crashing waves. But I'm okay.
What do you think... should I make the call to the psych ward?
(P.S The funniest part is - for the 2 years I was 'okay', I was okay and dealing with the fact that I was misdiagnosed and had been faking this illness for the past 15 years and worked on healing whatever traits of manipulation or narcissism or trauma that would make me fake bipolar and mental illness or at least have me convince myself and others that l was ill. And guess what - I healed through that too. Made a lot of progress. I was okay.)

I just need to speak a bit about myself,
a few details about me? To make it simple I'm of the invisible type, I'm 21 years old ugly yet extraverted, I have such anxiety that everyday feels like I have a metal pole up my throat and every single thing I do feels so painful.
I enjoy painting, the kind of art that is pretty weird, I enjoy physics, and overall everything that touches Computer Science.
The reason why I'm stupidly writing this, it's because it's been almost 10 years, 10 years I felt the same way, 10 years that I just wish to be obliterated from the surface of earth. 10 fucking years, I cannot even bear the fact that I still wake up, I still do the same thing over and over and over again.
I cannot actually even imagine that I lived for all the people for so long, i cared so deeply about everyone, and honestly that's the achievement and the peak of my life, but i cannot take it anymore, my shoulder collapsed a long time ago, and yet I held.
Yet i was always unimportant, and anyway I didn't ever care about it, all the people that could or did care about the pile of shit that i was either died or i managed to fuck it up completely.
And i write this like i care, i mean i used to, i used to give a fuck about everything even, absolutely down to the last minute detail, and yet i slowly lost it, the last thing that remained something that i felt good about slowly went away, the last thing that remains and rings like a fucking infinite bell is "finally fucking do it".
I've tried doing it, i've tried the worst ways, and i always pathetically failed,
and after almost a decade of suicide attempts, treatment, hospitalization, therapy, and medication, i still do things because i feel forced to do them so everyone around doesn't feel like they have a parasite around them, and someone even shittier than they could think.
At work or at school, it made everything even worse, I hated the clients. I hated the arbitrary policies dreamed up by some corporate idiot I'll never meet.
Most of all, I hate the omnipresent ticking clock that crushes my mind even outside of work. The clock that ticks down to my misery. It taints every action. Every thought. Outside of work, inside of work, it then follows me everywhere like another burden added to what i am.
And all for what? To what end? To get a degree? To have a life that I will despise ??
Maybe a slightly less miserable job at some stage in the future because of a degree and still what's the point?
What's the point of that? Buying the things that I "want" in a life i already hate, a life that i hate since almost more of half my existence?
Or what perhaps, on a more fundamental level, survival? Survival in a world that gets progressively worse and worse?
None of that is worth it. Nothing is worth this. The things that living takes from me can't be bought with money.
And I don't think there's anything out there that would feel different. What tasks in life takes no time, no emotional charge no qualifications, no arduous effort, no transportation, no interaction, nothing.
I am just low and for every single thought i can recall i always have been, I hate as well the medication i have, the loneliness i feel in my stupidly dumb apartment, and i don't know i guess i finally have some guts, guts to speak and guts to act on a change.
At this day, i want only one thing, it is to die, i want to be forgotten as fast as possible, i want to find a way to kill myself to do everything not to be discovered.
I just wish i could be completely deleted.

I messed up. A few years ago, it seemed like everything was going well and I had my career all planned out. I gained a decent amount of professional experience while I was in university and met lots of people in my field. Then in my final year of university, the pandemic happened and I lost contact with a lot of people. Lots of people I knew from my program ended up moving, went to graduate school or switched career paths too.
After graduating I didn't enjoy my field anymore and realized that there were not very good job prospects, especially without a masters degree, so I chose to start retraining for something else by self-studying programming. At the time, it seemed like there were tons of jobs but it turned out to be a huge mistake as I'm now competing against people with CS degrees that have years of experience working at prestigious companies that were laid off.
So after a year of learning programming and applying to entry level jobs, I now have a big career gap, an irrelevant degree, very specialized work experience (hard to explain to people not in the field), a network that's very specialized (it's embarrassing reach out to old contacts for references since I'm not working in the field anymore too and am unemployed now).
I'm now at the point where I feel like my only option is to restart my career from scratch. The benefit is that I do have a degree (which is better than nothing). I tried the temp agency approach when I was looking for programming jobs and it wasn't a good experience. Many places felt sketchy, they are always asking for references and very vague about the jobs they have (most of the times they just ask for resumes and then ghost you).
Many years ago I worked retail, so I am familiar with it and if I have to, I probably could back to it. I'm not sure how I would redo my resume for it though with professional experience that I have. One idea was to just list my old jobs to make it through ATS and leave off my professional experience but it might seem weird having an even bigger employment gap. The idea would be to try and find anything, work for a few months and then apply to something better, as having a job makes it easier to find another job and then I could leave off all my professional experience and not have a gap.
I'm mixed though, because I'd basically be having to forget about all my past accomplishments/work experience and restart my career from scratch but it might be the only way to find paid employment again.
Is this a good or bad approach given my situation? Has anyone else done something like this before?

I don’t, not yet.
This LT is a nice guy but socially inept. He’s nearly 30 years old but acts closer to 20. We started OCS together, but I dropped out, went regular enlisted, and he commissioned. During this process, I also hired him on the civilian side. I’m his supervisor’s boss. We aren’t currently in the same unit but it’s a small world and its not outside the realm of possibility that we will be in the same unit at some point.
Just wondering how weird it would be because at our day job, I perform evaluations and disciplinary paperwork, approve time off, etc.

I (22f) have just graduated nursing 6 months ago as opposed to my sister (23f) who graduated 2 years ago. We both still fortunately live with our parents as our plan was to save up until we can get up in our own two feet without having to spend lots of money during the cost of living crisis right now in the UK however as we're both living with our parents you'd probably think that it's only right that whilst we're both still at home, we should still help pay. Having just started recieving pay checks, I help out wherever I can, I've been paying for our groceries and the electricity bills per month as opposed to other ammenities that we all use. My sister however has not. She quit her job in Argos in March 23 hoping to somehow land the "job of her dreams" asap in the architectural field (as that was her major in uni) however she has been jobless for months and has not taken any initiative to look for jobs, not even to earn money herself. My parents does not know that shes jobless so she's been faking it, still getting out of the house with her uniform so they don't become suspicious and making me keep her secret. She sleeps all day, makes a mess in the house and just acts like a child overall. She also somehow manages to go out and party with having no income so i'm a little confused about that too.
I understand that landing a job in the creative field is hard as fuck but she isn't even trying to apply. I physically made her a template cover letter and cv FOR HER because I'm so fed up and yet she's still not applying. She is so incredibly spoilt and comfortable. I've confronted her many times but she gets angry at me and ignores everything that I say.
I don't know what to do. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!! Thank you.
Ps. When she still worked at argos. She still didn't offer to pay or help us out.

does anyone know about getting this once outside the country? I taught there literally a decade ago and lived there for 2 years, and didn’t think to get one when I was leaving because at the time I wasn’t planning to continue teaching internationally. from what I’ve read it doesn’t seem like there’s an option online. I know I’ll need it to get a visa for my next job and I’m not sure what to do.

A quick history:

• 2017 diagnosed with depression, I was 17 years old.
• 2017 -> 2020 depressed, not enjoying life, however I could easily study and do homework and work my side job easily.
• 2020 -> 2021 I started losing motivation, but since itwas my last year before graduating college, I pushed out my last bit of motivation and I made it! However, half a year after I started studying something else, I got terrible grades and had to quit.
• 2021 -> 2023 here is where things go very wrong ...

I've been at my parents house with no job and no studying for 1.5 years by now. Having no job or study is not what bothers me, it is the least of my concerns right now, I just think its important to mention.
But what really is the problem is that my willpower is near-zero. Because even though I have no job and no homework, that doesn't mean i have infinite free time. I have stuff to do. Important things. Like brushing my teeth and making a backup of my computer and texting my friends once in a while for example. I just gave 3 small (for me big) things but there are alot more, many more important things that I have to get done. My task list has more than 100 things on it.
I don't even remember when the last time I opened my task list for anything other than adding more stuff on it. Even though I know some of the things on it are really urgent or important.
So every day, I'm comfronted with hundreds of choices that basically comes down to choosing between, entertaining myself or doing something of my task list. Every minute of the day, my willpower is being drained from me trying to stay away from the things that distract and entertain me. My willpower is drained so fucking easily. If I have a good day and be productive like 15 minutes, then the rest of the day my willpower is drained from it.
Some people say willpower needs to be trained like a muscle, some people say willpower is a valuable and finite resource that has to be spent efficiently, I dont know...
Not even curing my depression is a priority for me. I don't care that I feel like shit right now. I got more urgent things to worry about
If I don't gain more willpower than I currently have, then my life will continue to be a mess, or worse
What am I supposed to do about my willpower? If I need to train it, how?

Truelogic is hiring a Senior Front-End Developer (Javascript) - Cannabis Industry (ID: 1465)
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I started university very young and as a final year PhD student now I feel like some of the decisions I made early on are coming back to bite me. My field is Psychology - I finished my BA at 18, MSc at 20, and will be 25 when I finish my PhD. I’ve never really had a “real” job apart from my experience in academia and tbh burnout aside just in terms of personal interest I don’t really enjoy Psychology or academia much at all anymore and the job prospects all seem kinda boring to me. Maybe it’s just fomo but I find myself wishing I’d gone into a hard science because as I’ve gotten older I realize I enjoy more of that hands-on field work type of experience which is pretty far from the path I’ve ended up on.
Imo most valuable skill I’ve acquired by doing a PhD is that I know I can learn to do anything, but if my qualifications are in Psychology I can’t just pursue a career in something else and further study after a terminal degree seems a bit weird. But I’m a little naive and lack a lot of real world professional experience so I don’t really know. I just feel pretty hopeless and it’s causing me a lot of stress particularly as I’ll be finishing my PhD this year and don’t know what to do next because everything feels so limiting and far from what I’m actually interested in.

I had started a great job, moved on from my last toxic workplace, and things were looking up from there. I did my job very well. Except, one thing. At this job I was supposed to call for things. For those of you who’ve never worked in a restaurant it’s simply yelling to communicate to the rest of the team what you need. I knew in my spirit I had the ability and experience to do so but crippled by anxiety I fell short every time. Relapsing during that time also made it worse. So after 2 1/2 months I relapsed after a 12 day streak and when I came off my break I no longer had a job. Now, I’m not blaming porn and masturbation but it definitely played a huge role. I binged for close to three weeks after that. There is no excuse for that. With that knowledge though, I’m not counting it as a loss but an opportunity. An opportunity to learn from my mistakes and work on the flaws that were revealed to me during my time at that job. I’m giving myself a month to start working again while also working on other goals that I have. So, here I am. Day 2. See y’all next week.

I got a big box of Lumineth models way back in October and was so excited to paint them cause they looked so pretty. I’ve barely painted any and every time I do it seems like everything goes wrong and I want to eat my own hands rather than touch them.
First I learned the horrors that is painting white, then I kept missing spots on them and having ti go back with the same paints like 7 times. I keep running out of primer, fighting my white paints. And now I tried to base them and it was the worst dry brushing job I’ve done and somehow broke my dry brush.
Am I alone on this? Or have other people had similar projects that they just want to throw out the window and never look at again?

Husband has talked to professionals in the industry, shared his GitHub, discussed his level of knowledge, skill, and understanding, and they say he's doing really well, with skills above even some experienced programmers years of experience (above entry level)
He has had recruiters, software devs, idk what else, even say his skills place him above junior level developer, but to apply for junior roles and not be surprised if they offer more re skills.
He works really hard at his projects (app/ websites), and he STILL doesn't have a job.
Swears everyone of all different levels of experience are having trouble in the industry, it's just the job market now.
Thoughts? Suggestions or tips for him standing out/ getting hired? Or reliable sources to tweak his resume etc and help him stand out, get a job (paid is fine, just not extortion rates)?

Maybe that title is a bit too cheesy, but I really do like exploring the night sky. Helps especially since my hometown was a great place to do so. That all aside, hello! I am Pydras, fat cat collector, lessor avatar of chaos, and most boring of all, corporate accountant. I am to find people to potentially connect with and see what develops. Whether that leads to friendship or something more will remain to be seen, but life is short so have to get out there and try!
A little more about me! As stated earlier, I am a corporate accountant, working in BC, currently saving up to buy a house. I am quite fond of cooking, and decent enough at it as well! I would say at least 67% of it would be tolerable to most people. Since my job is basically just sitting around all day, I try and workout at least three or four times a week to stay active and in shape. That being said I do have a sweet tooth that I am quite good at managing, except for my weakness of homemade baked goods. Art wise, I really have no skills in most of those areas except for writing (use to do some RP back in the day). Well, I do make quite the horrible MS Paint masterpiece if the inspiration hits, so that might count. Politically I am quite on the left side, and religion wise I tend to fall more into agnosticism and atheism.
For subject interests, my top three would probably have to be history, geography, and geology. One of my favourite things to do when bored is open Google maps and go to a random area and see what I can learn of those three for it. However, my absolute biggest interest and the one I hold closest to me is music. While I can't really play an instrument (have been trying to relearn piano), I usually have some sort of playlist on if I am not too busy or in a loud environment. I can literally go into paragraphs upon paragraphs about some of my favourite songs. Just about what I like about them, how they make me feel, etc. I am always up for sharing or creating playlists with someone, I truly feel like music is one of the better ways to get to know someone. My usual genres end up to alternative, indie, and math rock, but I will really just listen to anything that I like the sound of.
Hobby wise, it sort of depends on what time of the year it is. If the weather is nice in the spring or summer, I love to go for long walks and hiking. Just being out in nature beings a sense of relaxation and peace you can't get anywhere else. Plus, the views, just all the amazing views and secrets you can come upon. When the weather is not as pleasant or it is winter (so quite a few months here), I am usually found being a homebody. Probably no surprise, but gaming is a major filler of my time when I have nothing else to do. My main game right now is FFXIV, realized today that I have been playing it for over half a decade at this point, how time flies. I do enjoy the Paradox Interactive games as well, especially with all the amazing mods some of them have. Like music, I could spend hours talking about some of my favourite games. Would also love more people to play with, generally not picky about what, as long as you don't mind me potentially sucking. Gaming with people is always such a joy and fun time. I can be quite the reader if a particular book or series catches my attention. Once burned through a trilogy in a week since it captivated me so much. One of the dangers I found with me reading is I'll always go for one more chapter, then suddenly it is 3 am. Don't really have any specific genres in particular, though I am quite the sucker for some good worldbuilding.
I could probably keep rambling about myself, but why take away all the fun? As said before, I am looking for someone to see what kind of connection we can build. Location wise, for something more than friendship, you would likely have to be in Canada or have plans to move here. While I do enjoy all my friends in the US, I have no desire to move there unfortunately. Either way, if I intrigued your interests feel free to send me a DM and we can connect from there!

A bit about me:
- I work with animals at a humane society. There isn’t an animal I don’t like, though I’m hugely a cat person over a dog person at this point in my life. My job is not easy and I have a crude sense of humor to deal with the things I deal with day to day. I can make a joke out of pretty much anything .
- I am plus sized and I like to think I'm like a 5/10 on the attractive scale. I grew up with a poor self-esteem, but it’s definitely gotten better and I am learning to love myself.
- I am incredibly independent and have lived alone since I was 21. I am pretty inexperienced when it comes to dating/relationships.
- I love binge watching tv shows. My go to shows are The Office, King of the Hill, Grey's Anatomy, SVU, criminal minds, plus several other shows. Open to suggestions for more binge worthy shows.
- Social Anxiety is real, I love exploring chill places like museums, zoos, and thrift stores. Not a huge bar person.
- I am VERY childfree so if you want kids I am not the person for you. You got a cat/dog/exotic/fish? Sign me uppppp. Their is not an animal I dislike!

• I’m bisexual/ probably asexual (it’s complicated lol)

- I am a homebody but would love to find someone who can draw me out of my cave once in a while :)

• if your outside the US I won’t respond I’m sorry. I’m ok with a LDR to a certain extent but I wanna keep it realistic

​
What I'm looking for:
- Someone who is loves to joke around but also I want someone who can get into deep conversations and talk about things in depth.
- I would prefer to take things slow (especially if its long distance) I am not one to rush labels and though I dont mind exclusivity I just want to hang out and have fun. IM NOT INTO HOOK UPS so sorry if thats what your looking for. I can vibe with people and be in the mood but if you come out strong I'm not into it.
- Preferably someone on the tubby side too who can feel my pain lol I like the Teddy Bear types.
- 25-37 and in the US/ideally the midwest/Nebraska so meeting could be possible in the near future.
- Memes and pics of animals is ideal. Funny videos, music you like, anything that lets me know what you enjoy are things I really enjoy to receive
Would love to hear from you!!

Hey everyone! I am a 22 year old recent college graduate who for the longest time has been planning on going to dental school right after college. However, during my 3rd year in undergrad, I knew I needed a gap year. Throughout my undergrad experience, I have been working hard to keep up a 3.75 GPA or above as a STEM major, build my resume by being a part of organizations, volunteer, and work. I am coming out of undergrad with minimal debt because I worked hard to maintain my scholarships and I was a RA so I didn't have to pay for room and board. So I am quite burnt out to say the least. I am scheduled to take the DAT (Dental Admission Test) soon, but I have almost zero motivation to study and even lower motivation to fill out the application for this upcoming cycle. After some thinking and research online, I am considering taking another gap year, because I want to experience the world a little bit more before I go back to school. I have recently graduated and I am not really looking to work at a corporation, and there is a minimal chance that I may be hired for remote work, because we are currently in a recession and everyone is wanting to work-from-home and many entry level jobs require years of experience.
My current plan for my upcoming year is to move in with my sister and her family and work part time as either a waitebartender and other part-time jobs that are available so that I can save money and not have to work in a job where I have to think about science. During this time, I am also planning on volunteering at a pediatric mobile dental clinic that focuses on providing care to children of low income families. I also wanted to travel a little because I have had little travel experience, so I am planning on taking small trips locally within the United States, and a big trip I am planning is to go to Costa Rica with my friend. After a year of this, I want to teach English abroad in either Europe or Asia. I guess my biggest thing is that dental school is 4 years and I know that people start professional school at different points in their lives, but I am scared about what my family has to say. I have already faced so much backlash from them when I told them I wanted to take a gap year, because they said that it would be a stupid decision to take a break from school because it is really hard to go back to school and that it is better to continue with the process after undergrad and that the earlier you make money, the earlier you can retire and live a happy life because I will be financially stable and reach financial freedom. I am really at a crossroads because I understand where my family is coming from and that they want the best for me and letting them down would be so devastating, but I also want to live life the way I want and choose.
I guess the biggest thing I wanted to ask is if my plan for myself is stupid and an unrealistic dream or if this dream and plan is something I could pursue with more research and planning.
Thanks for taking the time to read this and I hope to find more clarity through responses.

I want to preface with mods - I think more discussion on working in the industry is healthy, and not just sales jobs. So - if you let sales jobs questions stay then I think this is perfectly valid.
So - I’m looking at applying for an engineering position at Recurrent Energy. I know they’re a Canadian Solar subsidiary, but they haven’t developed any projects in my area, and I haven’t heard anything about them. I’m wondering what your experience was with them - whether you’re an EPC, subcontractor or other developer. The position is remote with travel to site as needed - so wondering if anyone can share anything about the culture, were they somewhat organized, or any other feedback regarding your interactions with them.
There aren’t really many recent reviews on Glassdoor so hoping some of the professionals here have some tea to spill.