Hello - I'm (33F) looking for help and advice regarding my in-laws and the difficulties we face with their involvement in our lives. I would greatly appreciate your insights and suggestions on this matter.
Here's some context to provide a better understanding of the situation: My husband (33M), our 2-year-old daughter, and I live about 10 hours away from my in-laws by car. We both work full-time, and with a young child, it can be quite challenging to make the long trip to visit them frequently.
My mother-in-law consistently puts guilt on my husband, pressuring him to visit more often. However, when we do manage to make the trip, our visits often feel disappointing. Instead of spending quality time together, my in-laws isolate themselves in their bedroom, watching television.
To make matters worse, they complain about our infrequent visits but then make excuses when they have days off work, claiming they need to run errands all day instead of being able to spend time with us or our daughter. Additionally, on two occasions, they've planned their own trips in the middle of the week when we had planned to visit them, leaving us alone for a few days at their home. Whenever we are making a visit, they love to constantly bring up all of the things we will do as a family on our "next visit" and none of those plans ever play out. It's disheartening and frustrating to feel that our visits go unappreciated.
In the past two years, they have only made the effort to visit us once, and that was for just a single day. Needless to say, this situation has left me incredibly frustrated.
To add to the complexity, we live in the same city as my parents, who have put in tremendous effort to build a strong bond with our daughter. They play with her, take her on outings like storytime at the library, and have even cared for her on long weekends. In contrast, my in-laws haven't made the same level of effort. The most they do is sit our daughter in front of the television with her favorite show, which doesn't foster the same kind of engagement or connection.
This discrepancy has had an impact on our daughter's relationship with her paternal grandparents. She is much more reserved and shy around them, which saddens my husband. He wishes his parents would make a genuine effort to develop a deeper connection with our daughter, similar to the one she has with my parents. His thought is that if we just keep visiting, things will get better.
I'd love to hear your advice on how to navigate this delicate dynamic. How can I communicate my concerns effectively to my husband, and how can we address this issue with his parents without causing unnecessary tension? I want to find a solution that allows us to maintain a healthy relationship with them while also considering our own limitations and priorities.
Thank you in advance for your support and insights. I truly appreciate it!

I've posted about this in here before, but ended up deleting the post on day 1 because my WH found the post, since I didn't attempt to conceal my name or use a throw-away account. I've since just blocked him and his family, because Idrk who else to talk to about this stuff. So here I am again. It's been a little over 3 weeks, and for the most part, friends and family don't check in with me as regularly. I'm tired of thinking about it, tired of talking about it, but also can't get away from it.
He moved out the weekend before last, and I'm feeling some relief from not having him in sight all the time, but I'm also overwhelmed with having been thrown into single-parenthood so suddenly and unexpectedly. I feel like I don't have the space to grieve properly, because I have the hearts of my children to look after.I got a lot of feedback on my OP, most of it useful and thoughtful, some of it not so much. I'm sure that not everyone who finds themselves reading this post will have also read the last one, but I did want to add a little bit of context for those who did:
My husband and sister did not grow up around each other, so I'm not really concerned with the grooming aspect. -at least not in a long-term sense. Growing up I lived with my mother, and she lived with our father. She was only 3 when I moved out of the house, 6 by the time he and I got married. However, our being a mil family made visits home infrequent, and even then I'd usually go alone. He likely only ever met her 2-4 times at all before she moved to the same city us late last year.
Her version is that she was victimized by him. I KNOW it sounds incredibly shitty to not believe someone claiming to a victim, so I do want to clarify some things here: 1. I DO believe that she is and has been a victim in the MANY sexual relationships she has had with much older men, and that she seeks these relationships as the result of some deep-seated traumas from her childhood. HOWEVER, she has always entered into these relationship consensually and has never considered herself a victim of these men. Should the men have been/known better? Absolutely. Did they still actively engage in very inappropriate relationships with her citing her consent as their gross justification. Absolutely. So while, yes, I absolutely believe that my husband was the one who should have been responsible for managing their relationship as the much older player, I also do not believe that she ever felt victimized by him, but now claims to have been to earn my sympathy and forgiveness.
His version is that she sought him out even prior to their first exchange, and then began indirectly threatening him that she would tell me if their relationship didn't continue. He was also very drunk the first time, she had had nothing to drink, and according to him, initiated the encounter.
Things I do know: She sent a friend request to his FetLife account 5 days prior to the first encounter. She sent a friend request to her BILs social media account which contained multiple nude photos. I believe she at least fantasized about him, if she didn't actually plan to initiate sexual contact.
Will I ever know the full truth of what happened or why? Probably not. Idk if they're both lying or if they both actually buy into the bullshit webs they're spinning. Idk how much it even matters anymore, and Idk how I'll feel in 6 months, or 1 year, or 5 years, but today, right now, Idk how I'll ever forgive either of them for what they've done.
Also updated to add: I did tell my children, on the advise of my therapist. Because my children were very close with their aunt, this one couldn't be as easily managed by just omitting the "why" of our divorce. And there was a fear that it would come out later in an uncontrolled way or that I would have to create a story around why their aunt is no longer in their lives. It felt like the only thing to do was to tell them enough of the truth. And it's all just been really hard.

They were slowly making their descent towards the verdant planet below. Earth, according to their people back home. The long lost home planet of the humans that preceded them in the ancient times. According to the annals it was a planet on the brink of atmospheric collapse, caused by centuries of unmitigated disastrous handling by their ancestors. They had abandoned the place to seek refuge among the stars and, whether they deserved it or not, they had found it. This was the first mission of many that were send to scout the situation on the planet. The dream had always been to one day return. Most of human history here had been lost and what remained was often written in forgotten languages. Yet, to the crew of the ship, it immediately felt like home.
As the landing gear his the soft ground covered by lush green undercover, the crew packed their necessities. They would sleep in the spaceship at night, but venture as far as they could during daylight. Trying to map the ancient cities and industrial complexes, that were pictured in the ancient texts. With a rumble through the metal flooring, they knew they had truly arrived. The hatch opened and provided a path to this forgotten world.
The first thing the crew noted, was the overabundance of forest around them. On the imagery back at home, this world was depicted as largely barren. Here everything was covered in thick layers of overlapping growth. The air buzzing with life that in no way resembled what they were prepared for. No sign of the large geometric skylines of the cities, not the fast gray fields of asphalt. Oxygen meters cited an abundance of oxygen. Which was somewhat remarkable, as ancients legends spoke of a lack of clean air being on of the reasons for the great migration. The party set out on food, through the field of trees and bushes.
Every now and then they’d find an overgrown structure that hinted at ancient settlers. The architecture was brutish, pragmatic, but not dissimilar from the architecture at home. That recognition sparked a sense of belonging inside. This place was strange, but also recognizable. In the same way you would recognize a square shaped out of negative space. There were signs of pre-migration human civilizations to be seen here and it was oddly beautiful.
The crew had wandered further than intended, distracted by the sights. The regional star was dropping below the horizon, casting longer and longer shadows through the already dark forest. The stumbled upon what looked to be a large underground complex. Large steel hatches closed of a concrete structure. It was easy enough to shatter the decayed lock and chain. The loud sound of snapping metal echoing through the eerie silence that had accompanied the departure of light. They had enough supplies to spend the night in this bunker, albeit not ideal. One of the party stepped in first, flashlight held in front of him he slowly stepped down the staircase into the darkness. It was less deep than they had anticipated. After about twenty meters they hit the ground floor. One of them tried the switch, more out of curiosity than expectation, but the lights in the complex turned on, to everyone’s surprise. That must have been some reliable power generator they installed in here.
They strolled across rows and rows of barrels. Steel drums, all yellow in color, positioned carefully. It almost seemed like a piece of art or something. Each of them carrying a label. Yellow with a thick black outline and in the middle a black trefoil made out of triangles. None of the records back at home had carried knowledge of these symbols. But if this place was so well preserved, they must have been important. They decided to roll one of these barrels out of it’s socket and pried open the lid, careful not to damage it. The walls of the thing were much thicker than they had looked from the outside. It was a thin steel sheet bolted to thick lead on the inside. That explained why the things were so heavy. The barrel was filled with a thick resin like substance, carrying pieces of something that radiated a beautiful luminescent green. Out of curiosity they switched of their flashlights and in the dark they could truly admire the artistry of this barrel. It was like looking upon the stars in the sky, but in a barrel. Captured galaxies they would call them.
They'd spend the rest of the night opening more of these containers. Each of them containing more ore less the same. Some in different colors, some with less and some with more of those pretty stars. They had decided to give up on sleep and take the day off tomorrow. This discovery told them something real and unknown about their ancient ancestors. Each of the crew giddy about what the others at home would say to this wonderful discovery. They weren’t exactly getting tired, but carrying those barrels must’ve taken a toll on their bodies. Exhaustion, in the form of a terrible headache and muscle ache set in. It was also deceptively hot in this bunker as some of our crew began to undress to cool down from the intense sweaty fevers they were experiencing. It was when one of them started vomiting that they decided it was time to leave the discovery rest for now and try and get some sleep. They could carry one of those barrels to the ship the next morning and examine it there. They all dozed off, exhausted, in pain and feverish, but at home.

Hey Guys, Im here to vent some worries and frustrations and share my - maybe a little insecure- worries. Would love to hear all your thoughts about this. So six weeks ago I matched with a really cute guy on happn. We started out chatting on the daily and we found out we are pretty similar in a lot of waysand our conversations soon gained a bit more depth than the usual chats. We had our first date this saturday which we wanted to do a lot earlier but there's 2 hours of travel time between us and by coincidence we both went on a vacation right after each other which didn't allow us to meet up earlier.
Our date saturday was amazing! I traveled up to his city and we spend 6 hours together doing various casual things together. The time flew by and we had great conversation all the time with not a moment of silence or awkwardness. Around the end of our meat up and in our conversations afterwards he very explicitly confirmed those feelings were totally mutual and he would love to go for a second date next week. He also said that he would like a serious monogamous relationship which alligns with what im looking for.
So we are messaging day in day out and had a great date with a second upcoming but today I opened Happn out of curiosity and saw he last looked on the app 1 hour ago.. Is it stupid of me to feel kinda hurt about that? I know we are farrr from a serious relationship and it could be that he looked on the app for the same reason as I did but the idea of the possibility that he's looking for something better to come up and hop over from me to the next is something I can't comprehend when everything between us seems to go so great so far..

Hi, sorry for my grammar errors.
Right now i'm in very stressful situation. I recently [28 m] talked with my Girlfriend [24F] about activities we can do together. It's been an issue before. My girlfriend was afraid that she might leave my town and go back to her parents that live 260 miles away. It would of course end our relationship but after few months everything seemed to go back to normal.
Going back to the activites, she talked how she wanted me to go out with her on a concert. I am totally not a Concert person but i said i will go with her, and it made her really happy. But unfortunately i had problems with my job, that made me switch positions and now i work the dead-end job that is stressful and i'm trying to get back to some better jobs but it's really time consuming since i need to work on my CV. It made overwork, spend too much time looking for jobs and not taking care of myself or her [she lives nearby , around 15 minutes away].
And because of that i changed my plans and decided i will spend the time on sunday [the concert] working on my CV and looking for job, which was stupid. I told my girlfriend about it and she said ok and became silent for 2 days.
yesterday she responded to me that she feel sad about it and it makes her disappointed that i don't want to go and makes her feel that our life is stale and really enclosed, since she doesn't really have mutual friends and only thing we do is go to eachothers home or go out into city for food or some drinks. She said that it makes her feel sad.
I wanted to fix it and said that it was because of me overstressing a lot and i will go with her but she said she rather go with her friends alone, and don't want me there because she feels like now i'm just pushing myself to do it and it feels wrong, even though she said it felt cute that i bought ticket after i refused going out just to be with her there. After talking for an hour , she said she's okay and not mad , just little sad and needs to cool off.
So now i'm starting to feel like that's becoming a major wall that we can't cross together. She needs socializing but she doesn't have friends and we rarely go out together making me feel like we are on a thin ice with our relationship , that can end by her going to her parents.
What should i do? should do anything or just accept it and move on with our relationship and see what's gonna happen. Will that be a major problem later? We talked about marriage and kids and she wants to live together but the lack of friends makes it really difficult for her.
TL;DR! - Rejected going out on concert of a stupid reason. Made my GF go back to major issue of her feeling like we live an enclosed life without mutual friends, and it makes her depressed and doubtful about staying in my town, which would mean she comes back to parents and we end relationship [distance is too big]

I moved to a new city alone a year ago and made a friend the day I got here and we've been friends ever since. He has some me talk health issues (depression and anxiety) exacerbated by the fact that he's never had a job before and lives with his parents. The thing is, he needs constant validation and it's starting to exhaust me mentally. He's so negative and hasn't gone a single hour (on average, I don't physically count) since we've met without insulting himself in some way so that I can refute it and validate him to boost his ego.
A few months ago, I was clear with him and told him it's not my job to give him that constant validation and that I won't do it anymore. Now when he says those things, I either just ignore it or bring up a new topic. I have been hospitalized for a s*icide attempt (wasn't sure if I could say that on this sub) when I was 19, and was in therapy for years and it saved my life, I can't go back to that, but this friendship is draining me and I'm starting to adopt his mindset when he isn't around and that's really bothering me. I told him this a few days ago. I obviously love parts of our friendship, and we have a great time together, until he sabotages and ruins it with these things. I don't know if I'm being insensitive, but it's really getting on my nerves.
It was my birthday 3 weeks ago, and he spoiled me with some gifts I absolutely adore and told him it was honestly the best gift I'd ever gotten, it was spot on. Every time I use it (at least twice a week since then), I send him a picture and tell him again how much I love it. We spent the whole of today together hanging out, playing games, watching movies, and then about an hour ago he looked at my gifts on the table and said, "Do you even like them?" So I said he knows I do, I tell him all the time. Then he gave me this look like he didn't believe me and said, "You say that, but you probably hate it and don't want to tell me the truth. I'm so stupid for getting you a stupid present you probably wish you could throw away." I gave him an incredulous look and just got up and calmly asked him to leave, saying I don't have the energy for this conversation right now. He left and just said, "sorry for being stupid like usual."
This all just seems so bait-y and I'm not going to spend my days recounting my thoughts and feelings on everything to placate him. It's never enough, this just proves my point. I gave him all the validation about the gift, and he still found a way. It's mean of me to say, but I wish I could only have the good/enjoyable parts of this friendship and not this soul-sucking stuff. The good isn't something I want to lose, but the bad isn't sustainable.
TL;DR: My friend needs constant validation and it's breaking me down mentally.

This text is inspired by the drone attacks in Moscow this morning. The scenero is that in a few days, a city in Alaska is also attacked by drones, but with nobody hurt, just some damage.

1. How does the U.S respond to this?
2. Does it end up being that Russia has done this, or is there a different bad actor with their own agenda.
3. How does Russia respond to this attack? Do they deny it happened, or do they double down and threaten more, if the U.S. does not step back from supporting Ukraine?
   
4. How does NATO respond for this?
   
5. How does Alaska respond to this?
   
6. How do things resolve themselves in a few weeks?
   

hey y’all
posted this on /philadelphia, but i’m also gonna repost it here bc i’m desperate for help. this is my 2nd reddit post ever to please bear with me.
i need some help/advice on dealing with a serious trash/pest problem. i’m writing this because i’m feeling stuck and need some help as this is starting to seriously affect my mental health.
some context (sorry if this is long): i currently live in on francisville in a basement/first floor unit of a row home apartment with 2 other roommates. every day there is a pile of trash in-front of our apartment. our building does not have a trash receptacle, or a specific place for trash. my roommates and i have purchased cans which we leave unlocked for anyone to use.
we are sandwiched between two other buildings, one of which (allegedly) has a trash room (and is managed by our property manager), and the other has an alley where their trash cans are stored. however, tenants from all both buildings and the units above us dump their trash into a combined pile in-front of our apartment throughout the week. the pile never goes away. trash collectors will take what’s in our cans and most of the trash bags from the pile, but i guess bags rip/it is set out un-bagged and the trash collectors don’t take any of it, leaving a giant stinky pile of trash in-front of our apartment 7 days a week.
the results are pretty gnarly. my basement window well gets filled with trash. i have gone as far as installing plastic and metal fencing around it to prevent trash from getting in. it’s effective but not completely.
the worst part is the pests. today alone i have killed around 20 houseflies, and there are still more flying around. i have heard pests crawling around our walls, and even had an encounter with a mouse once. we just got a crack in our foundation sealed today that was surrounded my mouse and rat feces. it was in the same alley as our neighbors trash bins, which is also an absolute mess.
i am a neat freak, so our apartment is pretty clean all of the time. i think the flies and mice get in here because we’re on the first floor so it’s really easy to get in when people are entering and exiting.
i’ve contacted our property management who continues to remind us any pests in our unit is our problem to deal with. we’ve reported the rats and trash to the city through 311 and the public health department several times but nothing has ever happened. it is miserable trying to cook a meal with flies buzzing my head, hearing animals crawling in our walls at night, and being greeted with a pile of trash every time i open my door.
the picture on this post is from today and it’s a pretty average size. sometimes the pile is bigger.
i know the easy answer is to move out, but we (stupidly) resigned our lease and are here until next july. the location is really convenient for our commutes to work and proximity to friends/food/stores.
any advice helps, thank you.

Has anyone ever had their parking tickets (issued by the city specifically) go to collections? I never changed my address from my mom's house to my new apartment (I am likely going to move back) and was issued some delinquency notices I didn't know about until I went to pick up my mail. I paid all my tickets online but they said they were sent to collections literally the same day (today). I spoke to a representative over the phone and she let me know it will show as closed and paid in full and should not impact my credit , saying it is more like a medical debt. I've never had a collection on my credit report before so I'm a little scared, I hope it doesn't show up at all. Anyone ever deal with this before?

I have a few days to decide if I should transfer. Currently, I am attend a commuter school in a city that is not particularly competitive or highly ranked. Frankly, I don't like this college and only went because it was cheap and I could commute from home. The food is subpar, my major is mediocre and there is virtually no social scene, and the campus is constantly under construction. Since I commute and don't have friends, I primarily stack my classes and hardly spend any time on campus. Additionally, people tend to be reserved and keep to themselves, resulting in an isolating and lonely experience. People really just go to class, work and then sleep. Though I do want to add that I have really tried my best to make friends and am in a club that I actively participate in (I just seem to have a lot of acquaintances
Recently, I received an acceptance letter from a large state school located approximately two hours away. It has a higher ranking and is known for its vibrant social and party scene. While it may seem like an obvious choice to transfer, there are some things to consider. Firstly, I am currently a rising junior, which means that if I transfer, I would only spend two years at the new school. Moreover, the college in the city I currently attend is the likely place for me to secure a job after graduation, as I genuinely like the city. Furthermore, transferring would require me to adjust to living away from home and living on campus which would obviously be a huge change.
Although, I was a very outgoing person in hs, and still am, I think I would have a good chance of making friends there but part of me is worried I wouldn't. Solely because I'm not sure if people would have established friend groups by jr year. Given these factors, I am torn between continuing at my current college for another two years, despite not liking it, or transferring. It is worth noting that all my credits would transfer seamlessly. I apologize for the long post, but I am genuinely conflicted and unsure about which decision would be the best for me. Any advice from people who were in/ are in similar situations/or just any outside point of view would be immensely appreciated.
-add: Also just want to add that I would definitely be paying more at the other school as I would live on campus/need a meal plan, but not a crazy amount since it’s a state school)
short summary: rising junior who doesn’t like there current commuter college and is considering transferring to another college to live on campus. Debating whether or not transferring is worth it at this point, as I only have two years left and it would be a huge transition.

I've met some really cool dudes that I genuinely thought would make a great friend and then every single one of them one by one had to ruin it by trying to fuck me.
I tell them I'm not interested and just want a friendship and then they stop hitting me up or making an effort.
Women on the other hand are just hard to make friends with idk why. I've been trying bumble BFF and it seems to be a very common theme that right when it comes time to make plans and meet up they ghost me.
I'm 24, moved from home 3 years ago, and I have no friends in this new city. It's lonely. It's sad. Why do people go into friendships with twisted intentions. How does a 24 yo woman make friends these days?

My partner and I have been in a relationship for 3 years – the whole time we've been long distance.For context, when we first met, it was in 2020 during the peak of Covid and I had just gotten out of a relationship. We matched on Hinge and ended up talking for months - eventually we met up and started dating. But he was based in a different city than I was. He originally set his location to my city during the time when everyone was stuck at home. I didn't want to do LDR, but he convinced me otherwise and I decided why not. We got along well and we both liked eachother enough to want to date. He also said that he would be moving to my city by the end of that year (2020).
Fast forward to now- it's 2023 and he just finalized plans to move to my city. He ended up not moving back in 2020 and we've been LDR, even now. He had valid reasons as to not every year, such as financial plans, work, family, etc.A few months ago, I had begun to feel disconnected from the relationship. This caused rifts in our relationship as I lost the motivation to text and call him throughout the day. I think 3 factors play into this:
​

1. In my previous relationship, I was incredibly dependent on my partner and promised myself to become more independent in my next. I've realized I achieved this goal as I have a better social life, great friends, good work-life balance, have goals I am seeing slowly be achieved, etc. I started to focus on my life separate from the relationship.
2. We've been LDR for so long, that the distance is getting to me. He knows that I never wanted to be in a LDR, and I think with all the empty promises he has made in the past about moving to my city and his goals and passions, I was simply tired of it.
3. His plans for the future concern me (or lack thereof). He had plans to go to law school since 2019, but hasn't committed to studying. Him not going to law school doesn't bother me, but him saying that he wants to/needs to but not putting in place a plan or any work does. He has a lot of goals, but in the 3 years we have been dating I haven't seen him be proactive on any of them (like for a very long time, moving to my city, providing financial support for his family, starting a business, going to law school, moving jobs). We had numerous conversations about this but the result has always been more or less the same: he will work on it. Which he does for a few weeks or so, but this motivation slowly declines and fizzles out.

We have discussed the above points numerous times too. He has really tried to make an effort on his part to cater to me, but even so i'm not sure why I feel so disinterested in this relationship and him now of all times. Especially since he has finally made solidified plans on moving here. Generally speaking, he hasn't done anything wrong and he is a great guy - our parents have even met and we had previously discussed marriage and engagement. But it's come to a point where I've started to imagine life on my own and am now finding other people attractive. I had never felt this way before, and I'm not sure what to do. I know this is not fair to him, and I never acted on these feelings but I'm at a loss. It feels wrong to be texting him and long for a life outside the relationship when deep down I know that I don't want to be talking to him and feel like it's a chore. Are my feelings valid? Why am I feeling this way and what can I do?
TLDR; After years of LDR, I am losing feelings for my partner of 3 years and am not sure why or what to do. They are a great partner and besides the 3 facts listed above, I have no fault with him or the relationship. I don't know if my feelings are valid and if I need to work on it on my side or if it's a bigger problem.

Brace yourselves, this is gonna be a long one.
Table of Contents
1…… The Main Goal
2…… What I’m Seeking
3…… Personality
4…… Interests
5…… Physical Characteristics (with pics)
6…… Expectations of You
7…… Living Situation
8…… Deal Breakers
9…… Closing Remarks
(1)
The Main Goal:
Well if you’re browsing this subreddit then much like me, you were alone this weekend and I’m sure you’d like to change that as much as me. I won’t lie, I am going through a rough part of my life right now. It’s difficult for me to find the energy for anything at the moment and I’m just really seeking affection in general, anything that will give me a push. I don’t want to be that person who brings everyone down but I could really use someone to talk to right now. I’d really like to find someone who’s similar to me so much to the point that we do everything together and talk about everything while not having to pretend to be interested. I want someone with whom we can mutually spew our emotions onto and have those feelings reciprocated. Not an emotional punching bag, but an emotional teddy bear to hug and cuddle until everything feels better as many times as we need. There’s people who I’m sure have told you the same, they’ll be there no matter how many times you need the support, no matter how many times the insecurities and bad thoughts come back but they don’t mean it. I will be the exception, I’m not so ignorant to think some nice words and tales of relating to you will magically forever heal whatever ails you then get mad when you seek the same support again. Mental ailments are rarely temporary and I don’t care about someone because they’re perfect, caring about someone means being there no matter how many times they need you to be. It doesn’t feel like a chore, it doesn’t get old, and it never will.
(2)
(2.a)
What I'm Seeking:
I will upfront let you know if I’m clicking better with someone else or if you’re the one, I’m not here to tread the sea of fish or keep my options open, I’m here for one singular person.
(2.b)
Relationship:
A relationship is difficult for me right now, it’s been nearly half a year since I got out of my last relationship and the reasons for it ending are partially responsible for how I’ve been feeling and why it’s so hard for me to seek the comfort I so desperately crave. I will tell you about it but for the sake of not treating the entirety of the internet as my therapist, it’ll be in private. I really need the comfort of intimacy and the warmth of someone who cares. I'm not going to feel better if I just sulk and don’t move on. This is my attempt to get better, I’ll admit I’m not great right now and I don’t expect you to be either. If we can help each other heal, then I’d be more than happy :) A relationship isn’t just being there for when someone’s at their best. Even if a relationship is hard at the moment, I do want a life partner and I don’t want to be alone. Things aren’t going to get easier without you so I don’t want to hesitate. I view my other as an equal, I don’t like categorizing us into specific roles. We take care of each other and treat each other how we like to be treated, whatever that is, it's as simple as that. I don't care if you're "successful" or not, living simple lives with our days filled with love is the ultimate measure of success to me.
(3)
Personality:
(3.a)
On the Surface:
As you can tell I can be rather… stoic but that’s largely due to my current stressors, I truthfully am goofy and fun loving but I just can’t find it in me right now. I want to return to that but without someone to light up my world it’s been difficult to just have fun and enjoy stuff. I’m definitely more introverted, you won’t catch me at any parties or really outside at all. I definitely prefer being home though the occasional outing is not out of the question and one day I’d like to travel to other countries because I think that kind of perspective is important.
(3.b)
The Core of My Being:
I like being a spectator to it all and if we bear witness to humanity burning or its miraculous recovery, I want to watch it with you. I enjoy watching humanity advance, less so when it devolves but I want to watch it to the end nonetheless. I’m both a realist and someone who lives with my head in the clouds dreaming of scenarios or worlds that don’t exist. I’m saying that I enjoy a good narrative and can suspend my disbelief to enjoy something but you won’t catch me refusing vaccines or ignoring blatant facts for the sake of some pseudo science or witch doctor’s remedy. I’m an atheist but I do not rule out existence after death, not because I’m agnostic but because due to the nature of potentially infinite time at some point after how many googol years with a googol amount of 0s after that, something’s bound to replicate your consciousness perfectly at some point. It’s actually a really fascinating topic I like talking about. If infinite time and infinite possibilities exist, does non existence exist? Though that’s an awfully existentially dreadful thought process considering the ramifications of infinite existence and infinite possibilities during said infinite existence. I would say I’m confidently left leaning and I don’t think I could truly get along with anyone right leaning, at least America’s definition of right leaning. Left and right seems to have just become; do people deserve to suffer or do they deserve to live good lives? Being political is not something I expected to become but how can you not be when crimes against human rights are being passed on a daily basis and at the end of the day, everything’s political. Oftentimes I imagine the perfect moment as relaxing with my significant other playing games or cuddling in a cold room under blankets.
I value that special someone above all of the existential thoughts, the bad of the world, the good of the world, they practically become my world. So many worries wash away when I’m with them. I don’t know if that’s the defense mechanism my brain created to not feel bad 24/7 but if it is, I’m currently without it.
(3.c)
Insecurities:
I talk of philosophy and politics here but really I spend most of my time just playing games, watching stuff, and trying to not be sleep deprived. I’m also nowhere near as well spoken, heck sometimes I feel like my speech is broken. I won’t claim to be something I’m not, I sit at home while I complain about the world doing nothing about it wishing I had someone here with me. I’m not noble nor do I really want to be, I have morals I uphold but much like most other hypocrites I acknowledge that my comfortable life is built on the suffering of others without doing anything about it. Why? My sleep problems? Am I depressed? Is that why I have no energy to do anything? Do I just think nothing I could do could help? I can’t nail it down myself, maybe it’s a mix of everything, maybe I’m just a bad person. I have always told myself that if I had wealth I would help people but if I get that kind of wealth will I just become a wealth hoarder who tries to justify my riches as something I earned rather than something given to me through incredibly lucky circumstances? If I do help people is it because I’m a good person or out of guilt? Will I die alone? I feel like I drive everyone away with my clinginess, I get paranoid often and need reassurance often. It’s something I want to work on, something I’ve been trying to work on. Hearing that someone cares about me just never gets old. I value self awareness even if it’s painful.
(3.d)
Socializing:
I’m definitely a socially anxious/awkward mess, especially around strangers. I do feel a large amount of anxiety in public, people can’t tell by looking at my face since I kind of go stone faced in an attempt to block everything out but yeah you’ll notice that if we go out in public. Growing up my pediatrician said I was probably autistic, never got a formal diagnosis so that’s just great. But yeah that explains why I can’t make eye contact with people, I kinda just stare at the ground and avoid their gaze at all costs. A lot of these social struggles go away to a great degree once I know you for a bit but yeah I apologize for how terrible I am at socializing at first. Don’t let my social struggles fool you though, I love cuddling and being close with my person.
(3.e)
Sexuality:
I am a heterosexual male, though I’m not very masculine like at all. I may even be a bit feminine sometimes. Not that I believe any activity or manner of acting belongs to a gender but I don’t know how else to describe it. I’m definitely super affectionate and love it when my partner is too. I am open to dating demi people but I do have a libido so I don't think asexual would work out.
(4)
Interests:
(4.a)
Video Games:
As stated before, I do spend a lot of my time playing video games. It’s been hard lately with me having no energy but I really do want to play more games and have a good time playing them with you! I primarily play on PC though I do have a switch. I’m primarily into platform fighters, roguelikes, open world, survival, and sandbox games. As for single player story games, I enjoy watching them through twitch or youtube but for the most part I don’t play them myself. I’d watch you play them though!
Here’s a list of games we can play:
-Minecraft (Java)
-Risk of Rain 2
-Gunfire Reborn
-Roboquest
-7 Days to Die
-Phasmophobia
-Rust
-Unturned
-Bloons TD 6
-Platform fighters: Super Smash Bros. Melee, Slap City, Multiversus, Flash Party, Fraymakers
Whatever you want to play I’ll give it a shot! I will say that League bores me to death but I’ll play it for you :) I try to avoid MMOs, not because I don’t like them but because of how addicted I can get to them. I enjoy learning games in-depth so MMOs can be a fast track to addiction.
I recently got Kerbal Space Program 2 and ehhh not really worth it right now but hopefully later it will be? I’m super excited for Tears of the Kingdom! In the far off future I’m excited for Rivals of Aether 2 which is a platform fighter releasing in 2024, let me know of your most anticipated releases and I’ll see if I could play them with you!
Also I never got into FPS games but I could totally see myself playing like CoD with you or Escape From Tarkov. Any FPS really, I’m down.
I am a fan of Pokemon but with how things have been lately I don’t know how long that will last. Pixelmon is a common Pokemon mod I play for Minecraft if you want to play that! Also if I say I want to play something with you I mean it but there are often times when no matter how much I want to I'm just drained and can do little more than lay in bed so please don't think I'm making an excuse.
(4.b)
Science:
I really enjoy keeping up with the latest advances in pretty much everything, it could be biology, technology, astronomy, anything! I love seeing progression and I love talking about it! Really I could go on and on about what I’m obsessing about that day. I particularly love technology, ask me for my laptop specs I dare you. When I was little I always wanted to be a scientist of any kind but then insomnia and fear of college stuff hit me like a truck aaaand that’s the end of that dream.
(4.c)
Anime:
You got me, I like anime but I’d like to think my tastes are benign.
Here’s some of my favorites I can list from the top of my head:
- To Your Eternity
- Vinland Saga
- Spice and Wolf
- Re:Zero
- Mob Psycho
- Dr. Stone
- Attack on Titan
- Spy x Family
- My Hero Academia
- Ranking of Kings
- Demon Slayer
Okay I can go on and on but I will say I don’t like pointless fan service and the spamming of cliche anime moments. I mostly enjoy action and anything well animated if it doesn’t have a potato story. Heck Demon Slayer could be my top 3 out of season 2’s animation alone. I don’t watch slice of life often or romance but I would with you!
(4.d)
Misc:
I’m not going to go on and on about the tiniest little things when the main ones are covered but I’ll watch pretty much any show with you and anything really. I like random youtube videos that explain some kind of lore or mystery, sometimes mini documentaries too.
As for food I looove sushi and I’m a sucker for fast food. Okay and candy, definitely candy.
I used to play tennis but haven’t really had the opportunity nor friends to play it with and I’m way too socially anxious to seek it out. Also I will say that when we move to something like discord I type waaaay more casually. I’m not going to expect long paragraphs back and forth like we’re writing English papers for each other, I do enjoy long conversations but seriously don’t worry about having to put the utmost effort into every response, I just like making good first impressions I guess.
(5)
(5.a)
My Physical Characteristics:
I’m 5’8 (172cm), 128 pounds (58kg), with curly brown hair and blue eyes. I like keeping my hair long in the winter and cutting it in the summer. I’m pretty slim in general so if you’re looking for someone large, that’s not me. I don’t work out but my work is pretty physical so at least I’m not totally inactive. I don’t have the urge to work out or gain muscle but I do want to maintain my slim figure so if I start losing control of that I’ll work out. I like to keep my face shaved because I don’t think I look good with a beard/mustache so if you’re into those I apologize. I have an average amount of body hair? I’d prefer to be completely shaved but it’s easy to lose motivation with that battle, if you prefer shaved then I’d have no problem complying. Anyways here’s what I look like: https://imgur.com/a/MZZgf2t
(5.b)
My Physical Preferences:
Having physical preferences makes me feel shallow, if I could make myself not have them I would but unfortunately that’s now how that works. I don’t care if you’re shorter or taller than me and I don’t care if you weigh more or less than me. All I ask is that you’re slim-average weight. I would never ask for someone to be something I’m not. I don’t care about tattoos or piercings.**(6)Expectations of You (Relationship Only):**I am not looking for someone “exciting” or someone to “keep me on my toes” I’m not looking for someone to cater to my every whim or anything like that. I don’t care if you’re “boring” or if you aren’t “successful”. I know it’s a common thing for people to not want a “boring” relationship and to seek something argumentative or something with constant challenges but I just want to be with you. During the exciting times, the boring times, and everything in-between, all of it will be great with you! Maybe we do argue sometimes or maybe there will be challenges but that will never be something I purposefully seek out and I don’t want that to be something you seek out either. I will not play tricks on you and I will not play mind games, I expect the same from you. We all have personal measures of success we may or may not have lived up to but what I care about most is our commitment to each other. If we have each other we can get through tough times, near the ends of our lives I want us to look back and feel that this life together was worth more than anything. That’s not saying I want us to be haphazard, I don’t want us to make poor decisions for the sake of yolo and I want us to always be rational, especially with each other. I want you to be someone I can trust to make decisions and weigh the options with a level head, I’ll try my best to live up to the same for you. Most of all I want empathy, understanding, someone to feel the utmost comfort and trust in.
(7)
Living Situation:
Currently my life is pretty relaxed, I work 3 times a week as a night shift stocker. I currently live in a 2 bedroom apartment with my roommate but we’re looking to move into someplace larger by the end of the year if everything works out. The internet is weirdly great for Ohio too like I have fiber and later this year we’re supposed to be getting dedicated fiber so that’s neat. I’m not attached to Ohio so the ultimate goal living location wise is probably moving to a country that won’t send you into a lifetime of dealing with the repercussions from one medical emergency.
(8)
Deal Breakers:
Might as well make this simple and make it a list.
- Anti-vaxxers
- Unironically believing astrology
- Right wingers
- Hard drugs (occasional 420 and alcohol is fine, may even join you)
- Wanting children, there was a time when I was younger when I wanted children but with the state of the word that’s a definite no and I feel like I wouldn’t be able to handle the stress. I’d love a stress free life with as much time with you as possible.
- Homophobic
- Transphobic
- Racist
- Super Religious
- Don’t be a bigot and don’t deny facts.
(9)
Closing Remarks:
Well you made it, I was thinking that finding someone I’d be willing to put a lifetime of effort into at least required this much effort. If I think of anything more I’ll update the post. Also about timezones, it really doesn’t matter where in the world you are. I don’t have a sleep schedule and I have most of the week off from work so it really doesn’t matter.
I request that in your response you do put effort into it, it doesn’t have to be anywhere near as long as this but at least enough so I know that you read this and enough about you so I know why you saw potential compatibility. I will seriously read all of it and respond the best I can. I do also request a pic included in your response (sfw please) or one soon after we start talking to prove identity, I’ll send identity proving pics too. As long as this post is up, you can send a reply!

It is one of the recently added customers, can't wait to unlock the Golden!

UEFA Champions League Final Live Stream Reddit - Soccer Streams Free-2023 Soccer Live Stream-Football
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The 2023 UEFA Champions League Final will be a clash of two of Europe’s most exciting teams, Manchester City vs. Inter Milan, at Istanbul’s Atatürk Olympic Stadium on Saturday, June 10. Inter Milan beat crosstown rival AC Milan 3-0 on aggregate to reach its first Champions League final appearance since winning the competition in 2010, while City had a statement 5-1 aggregate victory over current holder Real Madrid to progress to the final in its quest to win the trophy for the first time. City’s embarrassment of attacking riches includes Premier League golden boot-winner Erling Haaland, midfield maestro Kevin De Bruyne, and English winger Phil Foden, and will aim to outmaneuver and outscore the Italians. Simone Inzaghi’s Inter side, recent winners of the Coppa Italia, are more known for their canny defensive nous and Argentinian Lautaro Martinez’s electric pace on the counter-attack. Read on to learn how to watch UEFA Champions League live streams securely with a VPN.
​
How to live stream the 2022–23 Champions League from your country
You can watch a UEFA Champions League Final live stream with a VPN by following a few simple steps:
​
Get ExpressVPN.
Connect to the VPN server location that matches the broadcaster you want to watch. For example, if you’d like to stream a British broadcaster, connect to a secure server in London.
Check the schedule of the broadcaster you want to watch, such as BT Sport (UK), and find the match you want to stream.
Tune in and enjoy!
Watching on a computer? For the best streaming experience, use the ExpressVPN browser extension for Chrome, Firefox, or Edge.
​
​
When is the UEFA Champions League Final?
Manchester City vs. Inter Milan – Saturday, June 10, 8 p.m. GMT / 3 p.m. ET
​
Watch Champions League Final live streams in Ireland for free
RTÉ Player
Price: Free
Channels: RTÉ 2
​
You can watch the English commentary of select Champions League football matches on Tuesdays through Ireland’s RTÉ Player—including Inter Milan vs. AC Milan on May 16, 2023.
​
Note: Only select games are available to live stream. Check the broadcast schedule here for RTÉ 2 on match day.
​
How to watch Champions League Final live streams for free in Austria
ServusTV
Price: Free
Channels: ServusTV

My fiancé and I are getting married in September and we have been together for 15 years (in fact, we got secret-city-hall-married a few years ago because of the political shifts in the Supreme Court) so we want to have a much less formal wedding than is normal (no parents walking down the aisle, no wedding party by us at the ceremony, no first/parent dance, no cake cutting, maybe even no officiant). For people who did something similar and basically had a big party, what is something you wish you thought of beforehand that would have made the day even more special/fun?

I moved in with my brother during Covid. It was the first time we lived together in a few years, and we are best friends.
About two years ago, I met a girl [24f]. I fell in love for the first time. I started splitting my time between her (who I will now refer to as Sydney) and my brother (who I will now refer to as Alex).
Alex was super understanding. He looked after my pets when I was gone on the weekend, he understood if I wasn't able to play games, he worked around my schedule to hang out.
Things were great, but the thing is, Sydney was 4 hours away. Whenever I went to see her, I left for the whole weekend, or when I got the chance, the whole week to work remotely up there with her.
At the time, Sydney was staying with a family friend of hers while she was getting back on her feet. We got permission for me to stay there to see her, as she didn't have the financial stability to be able to pay for the gas to come to me as often as I could go to her. She wasn't able to hold a job due to a newly found disability, and was in the process of getting onto unemployment when I met her.
After a little under a year, I was confident I found my soulmate. Then, she wasn't able to stay with her family friend anymore as he ended up moving in with his girlfriend and selling the house. She only had a month to find a new place.
My current lease with Alex was up in a month, also. We decided to start looking for a place together. She needed to be near her family for emotional support, and I wanted to try to be close to my brother so we could still see each other and hang out, or play Pathfinder together on the weekends. We split the difference and started looking at places right in the middle of the two locations.
When I spoke with Alex about it, he was hurt, but he understood. He told me to prioritize Sydney over him, as he would want to do the same if he was in my situation.
A bit of context about my brother's and my relationship before we go further. He hasn't had the best mental health record. He attempted suicide a while back. He was admitted, he got out, started changing his life around, etc. I followed him so I could be an emotional rock, as well as someone to be there for him. I ended up moving in with our mom when he did, as I got a job where he had one lined up, too. Then he left me to his current city after about a year. I went on to college, and we kept in touch gaming every night. I moved in with him a couple years back when my company told me I could go remote, then revoked it after I already signed the lease with him.
Now, back to the current timeline. It took a lot of appointments, gas money, and days off to go look at places. It drained my finances, but Sydney had the first month rent and deposit covered from her savings. It got to the point that I couldn't afford to pay rent on my current place, and Alex took the hit after I asked if it was okay that I couldn't pay right away, asking to pay it later when I got some financial stability.
He agreed, and after we finally found a place and moved, he found a place and moved, too. After everything was settled, he let me know how much I owed, which was just shy of $2000. It was a hefty sum, and I'm still paying it back.
Now that I've moved, I've switched from being Alex's emotional support to Sydney's. He has other friends, but they don't hang out with him like I did. They are more or less just work friends. Over the past 8 months, he has been alone, almost entirely. I try to make it over there a few times a month so we can play Pathfinder, but sometimes things get canceled on my end so I can make it to family events with Sydney. His mental health has worsened, to the point he's admitted to me that he isn't actively trying to commit suicide, but he doesn't really want to live anymore. Not to mention we don't really text chat like we used to, to the point where you can tell he isn't well by how he texts or avoids texting.
Every time I talk to him, I feel my own guilt weighing on me. I get sad, I start to tear myself down mentally, getting depressed to the point that I think I'm going to cause his suicide. He's started therapy, but I don't know how well it will go for him, or if he'll even give it a fair chance. He's going to try to get a pet that he can have as an emotional support by the end of the summer, as well. I don't know what to do to regain the relationship I had with him, but I can't just up and move back.
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TLDR: I [26m] have been close friends with my brother [32m] since I was in middle school and he was in high school. I used to follow him around to be his emotional support, and eventually found a girlfriend, fell in love, and moved in with her. Now that I've moved, he's a shell of what he once was.

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Stream Man City vs. Inter in the final on June 10!
​
The 2023 UEFA Champions League Final will be a clash of two of Europe’s most exciting teams, Manchester City vs. Inter Milan, at Istanbul’s Atatürk Olympic Stadium on Saturday, June 10. Inter Milan beat crosstown rival AC Milan 3-0 on aggregate to reach its first Champions League final appearance since winning the competition in 2010, while City had a statement 5-1 aggregate victory over current holder Real Madrid to progress to the final in its quest to win the trophy for the first time. City’s embarrassment of attacking riches includes Premier League golden boot-winner Erling Haaland, midfield maestro Kevin De Bruyne, and English winger Phil Foden, and will aim to outmaneuver and outscore the Italians. Simone Inzaghi’s Inter side, recent winners of the Coppa Italia, are more known for their canny defensive nous and Argentinian Lautaro Martinez’s electric pace on the counter-attack. Read on to learn how to watch UEFA Champions League live streams securely with a VPN.
​
How to live stream the 2022–23 Champions League from your country
You can watch a UEFA Champions League Final live stream with a VPN by following a few simple steps:
​
Get ExpressVPN.
Connect to the VPN server location that matches the broadcaster you want to watch. For example, if you’d like to stream a British broadcaster, connect to a secure server in London.
Check the schedule of the broadcaster you want to watch, such as BT Sport (UK), and find the match you want to stream.
Tune in and enjoy!
Watching on a computer? For the best streaming experience, use the ExpressVPN browser extension for Chrome, Firefox, or Edge.
​
​
When is the UEFA Champions League Final?
Manchester City vs. Inter Milan – Saturday, June 10, 8 p.m. GMT / 3 p.m. ET
​
Watch Champions League Final live streams in Ireland for free
RTÉ Player
Price: Free
Channels: RTÉ 2
​
You can watch the English commentary of select Champions League football matches on Tuesdays through Ireland’s RTÉ Player—including Inter Milan vs. AC Milan on May 16, 2023.
​
Note: Only select games are available to live stream. Check the broadcast schedule here for RTÉ 2 on match day.
​
How to watch Champions League Final live streams for free in Austria
ServusTV
Price: Free
Channels: ServusTV
​
The Austrian broadcaster ServusTV carries select Champions League football matches with commentary in German—including Manchester City vs. Real Madrid on May 17, 2023.
​
How to live stream the UEFA Champions League Final in the U.S.
Paramount Plus
Price: 6 USD/month and up
Channels: CBS and CBS Sports Network
​
CBS holds broadcasting rights for the UEFA Champions League in the U.S. Every match is available live via Paramount Plus, while select matches will air on CBS and the CBS Sports Network. Paramount Plus offers a seven-day free trial.
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YouTube TV
Price: 73 USD/month and up
Channels: CBS and CBS Sports Network
​
YouTube TV will show select matches on CBS and the CBS Sports Network. YouTube TV also offers a free trial if you only want to watch a specific game.
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Note: You will need a US credit card to subscribe to YouTube TV. If you don’t have one, subscribe through Google Pay instead.
​
Fubo
Price: 70 USD/month
Channels: CBS and CBS Sports Network
​
Live stream Champions League games throughout the season with Fubo, which carries both CBS and CBS Sports Network to watch the games.
​
Note: You will need a US credit card to subscribe to fuboTV.
​
DirectTV Stream
Price: 95 USD/month and up
Channels: CBS and CBS Sports Network
​
Live stream UEFA Champions League games with DirecTV Stream by subscribing to its “Ultimate” package, which includes CBS and CBS Sports Network, showing games throughout the tournament. If you only want to watch a specific game, try the five-day free trial.
​
Note: You may need a U.S. credit/debit card to subscribe to DirecTV Stream.
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How to watch a 2022–23 Champions League Final live stream in Canada
DAZN
Price: 25 CAD/month or 200 CAD/year
​
DAZN Canada is a great way to live stream UEFA Champions League games throughout the competition, including the final on June 10, 2023. However, bear in mind that DAZN no longer offers a free trial.
​
Note: You may need a Canadian credit/debit card and postal code (e.g., G1X 2W1, V9N 9C5) to subscribe to DAZN Canada. If you don’t have one, subscribe via PayPal instead. Keep in mind that your DAZN subscription will be locked to Canada and cannot be changed to another country, even when traveling.
​
How to watch a Champions League live stream in the UK
BT Sport
Price: 25 GBP/month and up
​
If you live in the UK, BT Sport is your best bet for watching UEFA Champions League live streams. You don’t need BT broadband to stream sports online: simply choose a Monthly Pass instead to get access to all BT Sport contract-free. You can get set up with the BT Sport app or web player within 15 minutes.
​
Note: This service is available to UK and Ireland residents only. You’ll need a BT ID to watch the stream online. To get a BT ID, you will need a TV license, a valid postal code, and a UK credit/debit card.
​
Live stream the Champions League Final online in India
SonyLIV
Price: 300 INmonth or 1,000 INyear
​
SonyLIV has the rights to broadcast UEFA Champions League matches in India. Matches are available to stream via the SonyLIV app and website.
​
Note: You need an Indian credit card to subscribe to SonyLIV.

This is a long one but TLDR at the end.
I just adopted a little angel from the humane society. She just turned two when I got her, about 2 months ago. She was there for a while because previous owner said she didn't get along with other cats & was aggressive. Of course when I walked in, she immediately won me over by coming up to me & loving on me -- she seemed friendly (aggressive in a good way) and very smart.
I live alone in a 1 bd apt, and don't plan on getting any other cats so that part didn't bother me. As I've gotten to know Lizzie, I've noticed what they meant by aggressive. I work from home and Lizzie requires a lot of attention/exercise. And if she doesn't get it, she is very good at making you pay attention.
I've had cats before, I know their tricks and how people generally handle them. I know to give them plenty of exercise. I noticed Lizzie needed a lot right away, I play with her at least 3 times a day -- morning, lunch, and late afternoon -- for about 20 minutes. I make sure she's going hard too, always go until she's winded/slowing down.
However, that is not enough. Lizzie will try to get my attention throughout the workday by doing things she presumably learned pissed off her old owners: chewing/scratching the cords from the computer I am using, eating and messing with plants/dirt in the plants, biting/scratching [insert anything here]. If she is frustrated enough, she will go into sicko mode and start attacking me, biting & scratching at me and treating my hands/feet as if they are toys (taunting me to fight her by attacking them). I am pretty sure the previous owner either played with her using their hands/feet or accidentally created this habit because she defaults to it if she doesn't get her way.
Now I know ignoring these things is likely the best solution. Don't show attention to attention-seeking behavior. However, she does not quit, and she is smart. She's chewed clean through two of my cords and knows how to turn off the computer (it is a desktop so she just jumps on the front and hits the button on the top of it). I know she knows because she doesn't escalate to these things until I've ignored everything else. And its obviously deliberate when she shuts it off -- she gets into jumping motion right in front and then looks at me. Sometimes she is hard to ignore. For example, I am on phone calls for work and she starts attacking my hand or threatening to turn it off (I am on zoom a lot of the time) so I am probably to blame at least a little to reacting to her shenanigans but at the end of the day, I have to do my job and will sometimes have to put her in the other room for a while. Not long, 20-30min as a timeout. My apartment is very open with the main space and only one closed off room. It is not uncomfortable for her to be in there but I'd like for us to live in harmony.
Furthermore, she sometimes escalates to sicko mode and attacks me (claws/bites) even if I am not working and giving her attention. She will flip on a dime -- we're snuggling on the couch, watching tv, she rubbing her head into me and then I touch her wrong, she immediately starts biting me. Her affection sometimes includes biting too, but it is soft then, not like these times I am referring to. Like I said before, I think part of this is her trying to play (and perhaps she was taught wrong before?). But sometimes she seems really defensive: she sometimes has really strong reactions to me standing up or making a sudden move -- sudden to her. And gets scared sometimes when I come in the room unexpectedly or in a rushed manner. I don't know, some behaviors seem to indicate she was abused from her previous owners. Not accusing, just possible reason for that, I guess and trying to give as many details as possible here.
I've tried other things besides ignoring her behaviors, tried the squirt bottle. She's impervious, just keeps coming. Like I said, sometimes during the workday I have to separate her for a short period of time because she just keeps going even if I ignore or spray her.
My question is, what are some other methods to stop these behaviors? Ignoring bad/attention seeking behavior doesn't seem to work, giving her something negative when she does a behavior I don't like doesn't seem to work either. Maybe there is another thing I can do when she exhibits attention seeking behavior that I don't know about? Or perhaps positive reinforcement works better? My old cats weren't that hard and ignoring/water worked on them so I am a little out of my element on this one. I've read a little about clicking tools and that method, can anyone relate their experience with that? How do you use that to stop negative behavior? Or you just keep rewarding good and they eventually stop the bad? She's super picky with her food and I haven't found a treat that she loves yet, I'm not even sure a click and a treat when she exhibits positive behavior would be motivating for her (lol also need suggestions on best treats). She is definitely bored and I wish I had some more things to keep her occupied while I am working. I have one of those laser toys that goes on its own trajectory but she's bored of it after 10 min. Her favorite is the wand which I do the three times a day thing with. Pretty much ignores other toys. Any other toys or things you can give your cat so they can entertain themselves? Not boxes guys, I got those!
I would let her outside if I could but I live in the city and it just is not an option. I know redditors would hate me for that anyway, but I can tell she's dying to get outside. I got her a leash but she does not like it. Will claw to the death when I try to put it on and if I manage to, doesn't know how to walk around with it and just flops over whenever any resistance is applied. I also got one of those carrying cases that has a big see-through portion to at least just show her around outside. She doesn't hate that as much, but doesn't seem to love it.
What am I missing? Are there any other cool toys to keep her busy? Are there any other methods I could try? Including positive reinforcement? Am I just not giving her enough attention/exercise during the work day? What do I need to do differently that I haven't realized yet?
TLDR: my cat has some abnormally strong attention-seeking and aggressive clawing/biting behaviors when she doesn't get the attention she wants, how do I teach her out of this? Or alternatively, any other ways to exercise/stimulate for long periods of time where I don't need to be involved? Also need suggestions on best treats to try positive reinforcement!

First Next

On a sunny, small-town street on Sanctuary:

Lisa Anderson was watching her two young sons play some kind of game with the other neighborhood children that involved throwing a hard rubber ball at each other, while trying to avoid being hit themselves. When her Charlie was only five she would have fretted over such a violent game, but she's since given up on having boys who sit quietly and play gently. Boys were strange creatures to come home all smiles yet covered in bruises, and again, she'd long since given up on understanding the why in favor of just loving her beautifully rambunctious boys. They were already so much like their father.
The easy smile that had adorned her face slipped away as a black speck in the sky resolved itself into a stately gravcar coming in for a landing, rather than speeding along to a more likely destination. This was Honor Guard Place, and while not every family was related to a current serviceman of that formation, and some other families lived elsewhere, every family in that little town was connected to the Honor Guard somehow. Which had given the families a sense of shared comfort in the fact that their husbands, fathers, and occasionally wives and mothers were relatively safe while serving. Something caught in her throat as she wondered who had suffered a tragic accident, and which of the xenos nations substandard constructions had caused it. However, when the car landed, and the Major stepped out, she had to clutch her porch railing to keep her feet, because the officer made his way straight to her.
"Where's John?" she demanded as she watched the Republican Naval Infantry officer harden his resolve.
He stopped at the steps up to the porch and saluted, "Ma'am, it is my sorrowful duty to inform you that your husband, Sergeant Johnathan Anderson fell in battle against an aggressive xenos force in his duties to defend the civilians of the Among the Star Tides We Sing and the diplomatic corps. I'm sorry."
Lisa shrieked as she threw herself at the aging officer. "NO! YOU DIRTLY LIAR!" she cried as she struck his face, "YOU BRING HIM BACK! YOU BRING HIM BACK NOW!" she howled as she tore half of his ribbon block from his dress blues and beat his chest with the ribbons still clutched in her fist. The man stood there and absorbed the beating without so much as breaking the salute until she sagged against him with a wordless wail, and clutched at his uniform.
"I'm sorry ma'am. Your husband was witnessed, though his remains are not recovered."
The sobbing woman seemed to regain some of her strength as she declared, "I am not burying an empty casket on Repose."
"Aye ma'am. We will wait until such time as recovery operations can be commenced, and you will be kept informed of this status."
Charlie had done the math, and was leading his little brother over to see his mother. His daddy didn't cry when he lost friends, Charlie could be strong like that, strong for his mommy and little brother. Lisa's eyes followed the Major as he trudged back to the gravcar, replaced his uniform top, rearranged his ribbon block, and walked toward the house next door. With growing horror she realized it was not just her tragedy, not just her boys who lost their daddy.
Eighteen houses later, and the RNI major was seated in the sitting room of the Mitchels after giving them news of their son. Veterans both, they knew the loss for what it was, and sought each others embrace for the quiet solace of shared grief. Their grandson was only eighteen and had just lost his father, and after his mother abandoned the family, James Sr. was James Jr.'s entire world. "Who killed him?" the young man spat.
"A genocidal faction of xenos called Axxaakk. It is unknown whether it is a small faction or a monoracial empire. They have conquered the Clans of Eldra, and are currently ritualistically exterminating them."
"I'm joining the RNI," he declared as he leapt to his feet and shot a challenging glare around the room.
"Jayjay, you're still too young!"
"I'm eighteen, it's my right to serve! You're both citizens, but you can't stop me! It's every civilian's right to volunteer!"
"Aye ma'am, he's right," the major said solemnly, "but if you think the Navy will give you a shot to kill the commander who ordered that attack, you're wrong. If you can't keep your head, they'll put you on boarder duty by Roma Nova."
"I don't care. Dad only ever served the Republic, and I can't just sit here and enjoy that without helping!"
The major stood, snapped off a salute and took his leave. Forty houses to go.

In the City of Foundation on the planet Hope:

Michael Nguyen was neglecting his job. To be fair, being an accountant didn't take very much effort on his part, but in the past few days, he couldn't focus even on what little demands of his talents were demanded by the spreadsheets. Instead, the video he had been watching for days on end demanded the whole of his attention. His ears were laid back, his tail lashed the ground, and his muzzle was contorted in a snarl as he watched the vile sacrifice ritual intercut with the last stand of the Honor Guard, and ending with the teenage girl's screams followed by Corporal Laurent's whisper of "Witness me." Then, text filled the screen, "Remember the We Sing"
"Remember the We Sing," he whispered as he made up his mind. He was a Republican civilian, and he had taken all of his freedoms and privileges for granted, scoffing at the citizens for putting themselves at unnecessary risk for a mere social title. He saw now that it was very necissary risk, risk he was willing to shoulder. He wasn't the only accountant who walked out of that office, he wasn't even the first.

On Texan Texas, in New Better Dallas:

Staff Sergeant Marcus Johnson fought exhaustion as another civilian screamed at him, "PUT A FUCKING RIFLE IN MY HANDS RIGHT THE FUCK NOW! I KNOW HOW TO FUCKING SHOOT!"
"Sir, nobody skips aptitude placement, the medical exam, or basic training and MOS school. If you really want to fight, you're going to have to follow the law like everyone else. Please review these papers and sign whe-"
The furious Texan scrawled his name on the papers at once, "Fine. But you just watch, I'm gonna be a drop trooper."
"I'm sure you will, sir. Please take your papers to the waiting room upstairs and wait for your physical," Staff Sergeant Johnson said as the Texan stormed toward the stairwell. "Next."
"YOU PUT ME IN A PILOT'S SEAT RIGHT THE FUCK NOW," A Texan woman was screeching the moment she stepped up.
"Ma'am," he began again, and resigned himself to absorbing the fury of civilians who had never before taken a thought for the cost of their freedoms.
Some asshole yelled, "Remember the We Sing!" Which of course caused for the cry to go up with the whole press of furious Texans for the eighth time that day.

Aboard the flagship of the Lord Admiral Council of the Sar Sailors:

Lord Admiral Yoivkron nodded to his fellow Lord Admirals, and nodded. There was nothing to discuss, before they had even com together upon the With Wise Counsel We Chart the Stars, they had communicated their intentions. The Star Sailors would sound the drums of war. "Ancient names have been recommissioned, the Let Our Foes Tremble, wears a new hull, the Our Dead Cry Out for Justice has subsumed a Justiciar, and other names unspoken for centuries adorn our ships. The captains do not wait for our word, so we must command an evacuation fleet. Those too young must be kept from danger, and there must be those who shall tend to their needs far from the front."
"Aye," said Lord Admiral Brexcid, "We go to war. I do herby commission the construction of a new warship, Among the Star Tides We Rage."
"It is so," the counsel intoned together.
"Let the orders be written," Lord Admiral Youvkron said.
First Next

I was telling the story of my divorce here. After being betrayed by my ex-husband, I have trust issues. I've been single for more than three years. I worked through the trauma with a psychologist and recently decided to install Tinder to get to know someone.
I met a man who is also divorced and has a daughter, just like me. We corresponded and flirted, and then it turned out on Instagram that we have a mutual friend and we met at her house a year ago. Then we began to communicate even more warmly, because we remembered each other.
Then we met and walked around the city, he talked a lot, and from live communication it became clear that he was very emotionally detached. I thought something was wrong with me, I wanted to hug him goodbye, but I realized that it was better not to do it. I was very sad, I wrote to our mutual friend. She confirmed my fears that this man has not survived his divorce and still wants to get his ex-wife back. For two days I was very sad, I realized that this attitude did not suit me, and we stopped communicating with him.
It took me a very long time to gather the strength to try to find a relationship again, to open up and trust, and this case cooled my desire to look for someone. So for now I decided to pay more attention to my daughter and work. It's just lonely sometimes.