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I got to a point on a few tabs of DS3.0 where I started to panic about time dilation. It was moving shockingly slow, coupled with thoughts of how much more intensity I could bear, and for how long. It passed fairly quickly but was uniquely jarring.
I’m 35 and have been tripping since high school. That’s possibly the most existential panic I’ve ever felt.
The funny thing is, after I peaked that little voice chimed in “you coulda gone deeper” “how deep does it go…?”

So im a regular at this coffee shop near my house and about a year ago the barista and i would be super awkward around each other and i didn’t know why. I started noticing him stealing glances when im not looking near the corner of my eye and giving me discounts or things for free to try. My sister has said hes normal around her but around me, he stumbles with his words and acts very awkward and says cringey things haha. He knows what car i drive and he already starts getting my order ready before i even say anything. He’s even used the “how you doin?” Line on me from friends which I thought was funny. Im just scared that im reading too much into things and I’ll get rejected if I ask him out. Ladies have you ever asked a guy out and guys would you think it was a turn off if a girl asked you out?

To preface I work overnight at a gym. I see more than enough girls that I could interact with but for professionality I just don't most of the time. It always feels awkward and most girls already feel uncomfortable at the gym I'd rather not make the first encounter every time they enter (me) to feel awkward. So that said I don't flirt or do anything more than I would do with any other person.
That said I recently trimmed up the whole head piece and I've been working out and eating a lot better. Honestly probably look the best I have in 5 years (I'm 31m). Anyway I asked this girl how to pronounce her name because it never came up and I like to greet people by name and wanted to make sure to say it right. Not sharing the name for privacy but more than a few people agreed they would have guessed the wrong pronunciation the first time around. So I ask and she gets red in the face and tells me and follows with 'its a stupid name'. I replied 'No, no, I think it's really cute'. Explained I just wanted to make sure I knew how to pronounce it and said our quick goodbyes and she left. I could tell she was red in the face over it. Anyway me and my co worker chatted about how pretty she was (female coworker my age) I jokingly mentioned I should get her number.
Next day I'm sitting at my house and I get a message from this girl randomly to the extent 'f 'Hey, I wanted to say your new haircut looks great but I'm an awkward bean' and I reciprocated with something like 'Well thanks, I kinda like everything you got going on but I try to behave when I'm at work. That made my day :)' We chatted back and forth a little bit for a day or two and I offered a painting date (I gathered she likes to paint and I have an art degree so I thought it would be perfect). She said it sounded like a good time and when I got to picking a time she let me know she is very busy. Like 3 jobs doesn't text back for days busy. When she does get back it is always very nice and genuine but it feels like ages between.
To get to the question, how often should I be reaching out? Like I'm willing to wait (I work a lot too) but I also don't find it ever that hard to answer a message or two here and there to keep the convo going but I get the vibe that I'm going to pester and fizzle it out. Should I even be poking at the conversation if I haven't heard back in a few days. I've done that a time or two and I always get back a a small sorry about work or being busy and I get it but sometimes I wonder is this just a nice way of playing me off. I don't know. The girl is beyond cute and has a super attractive attitude and personality to go with. I'm just super interested I guess and maybe a bit impatient.
I am beyond out of the dating game, have been for a long time to get myself together and I finally feel pretty good about getting back out there so sorry if it feels like I'm a lost middle aged man, I'm just very far out of the 'game' and everything seems to be so touchy these days.
Thanks for any thoughts, it all will surely help!

After seeing their Q&A, I have no words. I used to follow Drue, back before the wedding. When she came up on my FYP, I instantly related to her. My husband and I got married young, we both worked full time jobs (still do), as a nurse and a steelworker, we had (& still have) so much fun together adventuring, raising our daughter, and navigating life. My husband is the best, truly, he treats me like a princess, he is a present husband and father, we are equals to one another, and we have the best life. I say all of this to say, and I hope she realizes, how disgusting and disrespectful Gabe was towards her in what he said in that Q&A. I would be heartbroken and mortified if my husband spoke of me and our intimacy the way Gabe did of Drue & their sex life. Have more respect for your wife than that, Gabe. Seriously, both of you, DO BETTER. It was one of the cringiest videos I have ever watched in my life. I just wish she were smart enough to realize how disrespectful it all was, like she’s a piece of meat. It’s okay to have a healthy sex life, if they even do, but the hand gestures and the commentary was distasteful to say the least.

If your meds work for you, does it feel like cheating?
I was put on low dose Cymbalta and 1.5mg Vraylar. It's great. Well, not the Cymbalta, it's causing sleep maintenance insomnia and nightmares, we're stopping that.
Does it feel like your cheating? I haven't needed my therapy appts. I've been...Good. Great. My husband and I are not fighting, despite deployment "abandonment". My reactions to the unplanned fuck hole that is military wife life are subdued, not numb, but quiet, less loud and turbulent in my mind. They feel, far away.
I've been with my therapist for over a year. I'm skipping sessions because I'm fine. I have nothing. No problems. I've dealt with my trauma, long ago, or I'm aware enough of it that I'm not surprised and I understand.
DBT is great, and I love it, but I don't need it. I didn't do it enough to "be healed" before medication. I do it now and I feel...still a little hollow. I'm not sad. I'm on antipsychotics, I can't be sad. I can't be angry. I'm just not.... Me.
I visualize my situation, the way I feel vs my "normal" reactions, and it looks like...a bridge over hollow earth. A sink hole. Buried depths that I didn't fill in, only bridged over.
I feel like a fraud. Sort of. I feel good... Am I just waiting for it to collapse? Am I really real? Is this really how....people are? Reacting so...rationally all the time? ALL THE TIME?
Did I use a cheat code? Did I go God mode on my video game of life? Am I fake? Is this who I would be if I weren't so traumatized?
I know, DBT. Radical acceptance. I needed some help. With medication. It's working. It IS GOOD. I won't stop taking it. But is it REAL? Is this real? Is BPD so bad? I know it is. I know it makes me terrible to those that love me. I know it makes me bad to myself. But did I really just skip all the work?
Did I skip all the work I was supposed to do? Why do I feel like I let her down? My therapist? I didn't do the work diligently (thanks adhd), and I overcame it's need.
Thanks for coming to my TED Talk. This has been Lani with another identity crisis.

i think i’m reaching my limit.
my mother doesn’t love me unconditionally like she loves my father, practically worships the men in her life because she’s so fucking stupid to stand up on her two little feet for once. she’ll end up killing herself for him and i will just have to watch it happen, hating myself for loving her unconditionally despite how much she hates me. hates my body, hates my personality, hates my happiness and hates my depression. hates all of me, in ways that i never thought a parent could hate their child. a men-over-pride kind of woman, the kind that will have nothing to show for except an old wedding band and belly scars. i hate my father. i hate that he’s the pinnacle of man, that he believes himself to be above god’s words and yet he’s reaping what he sowed. i hate my parents for beating me as a child because they didn’t know any better as immigrants, i hate my parents for not being better parents, i hate my parents for the fact that they will choose each other and any of my other siblings over me. i hate that i will never be their first choice and somehow i’m supposed to be fine with it. i hate my life. i don’t perform well academically because of some adhd, but yet i still want to be a teacher. i wanted to publish a book at one point.
yet i’m hopeless. i hate my life. i want to die because i’m unloved by the people who should’ve loved me more than anything in the world and yet they hate me. my father’s perverted and conservative views hate me, hate me for being a daughter instead of a son, hates me because i refuse to bear a child when my own parents couldn’t even love their own. i hate being an american child, seeing the drastic difference between parents and seeing just how much family love is so genuine and yet there is no warm in my home. there is no love. i’m a college drop-out, struggling to find a job, struggling to learn out to drive, struggling to find a way to live and maybe i’m just a spoiled brat. i know my parents feed me, keep my head out of the rain, will keep the house warm when it is cold. but love is not a requirement and they will never show me that. why cant i have one thing?
i wish i was born in a different life. where my mom didn’t insist that starving me was right, where she could think with a mind pure of her husband’s influence and pure devotion to men, where she could love me with eyes that didn’t despise me. i wish i had a dad that loved me, that stayed for me even if he had to work. that didn’t now try and form a relationship now that he’s old and dying, that he could put down his views once and fucking see me. i wish i was a better older sister, who could shield my sister from anything and be the best role model in the world. yet i’m fucking miserable. i’m depressed and i’m clutching this bottle of tylenol, crying through grit teeth because i don’t want to live anymore. i don’t want to live this life. i would rather die than live this life.
i am so exhausted.

My unmediated BPSO of 5+ years is pushing me over the edge. If he’s mad about something, he either finds a reason to blame me or something else to get mad at me for. If he asks advice but already has his own plan in his head, he takes my advice and gets angry at me for it. How am I supposed to deal with this? He blames me for things he could have made the decision for, and proceeds to not talk to me for hours following. He claims I don’t talk to him about anything. I do though, he just doesn’t take it into consideration. He also blames me for his worry, as if I’m the ones that makes decisions for him. I don’t know how much longer I can deal with this. The anger and guilt trips are far too much for me to handle. I never project my anger onto him, I keep it inside. He’s currently sitting beside me, staring at his phone. He won’t speak. He won’t “talk” about what he said we need to talk about. I’m going to break. I’m so tired of being the strong, supportive, reassuring person.

I (19F) am very sad tonight. I find myself in these situations very often. I date a man for a couple months , I suggest that we should speak about deciding what direction we’re taking, and he ends up saying “you’re just too young for me, you’re going to grow up and change your mind so I can’t fall in love with you.”
It happens very often. Is this just how it is with age gap relationships? I hate feeling like it’s my fault. I have so much love to give, so much loyalty I want to share with someone, so much growth and closeness I want to enjoy as well. Even the hard times I’ve prepared myself for.
Why do older men date me knowing they will never want something serious with someone my age? I don’t understand. It makes me want to give up.

​

I’ve been a therapist for over 15 years and for most of those years, my work with clients was primarily done in person in a counseling office. When the options for telehealth came along, I myself wasn’t sure what I would think about doing virtual counseling sessions, but I’ve really come to love it. I found that the face-to-face part of being with people that I love, I still get to enjoy because of modern technology.
I quickly learned the only real difference in doing counseling virtually versus in person is location. Yes, just location – and because of that difference in location, there are some real benefits to doing counseling virtually.
1. Convenience
You can attend your session from the location of your choice based on where you need to be that day. As long as you have a device like a smartphone or a laptop with a strong internet connection and a quiet place with privacy, you can attend your session! You also eliminate all the travel time and traffic considerations that can make scheduling tough. With virtual, you can block out the time on your calendar for your actual session, without needing to block out all the extra time to get to and from your appointment.
2. Consistency
Because of the convenience, virtual sessions also create consistency. Studies show that when clients are more consistent in coming to therapy, they get better results. Consistency helps create the momentum that leads to lasting change. With the option for virtual sessions, work or personal travel doesn’t have to force you to take a break with your therapy. Neither does a little head cold. If you’re a little under the weather and don’t want to spread germs, but don’t really want to miss your appointment either, virtual sessions keep you on track.
3. Comfort
And finally, virtual sessions bring comfort. You get to do your therapy sessions in a place of your choosing, your safe space that is already familiar. Maybe that’s your favorite comfy chair or couch. Maybe that’s in your office. I’ve even had clients do their sessions in their car at the park. Pick a place that you can relax and be free of distractions.
These “3 C’s” – convenience, consistency, and comfort – are huge benefits to doing counseling virtually. If you haven’t tried it before, I encourage you to give it a shot, whether it be for one of your sessions or all of them! You may find that you like it just as much, if not even better.

18m, going to be 19 in May. Middle school is ending and I've signed up for the police academy since my big dream is to become a police officer, maybe even special units. God helped me abandon my shitty habits, started to workout, eat healthier etc. I know this question's a little retarded, but it's been on my mind for a while. I didn't have a gf yet so I just want to know something. How does dating work in the police? Don't they work like 12 hours a day?

TW: mentions of depression and eating disorders
For a long time I have struggled with very low self esteem. Everytime people said I said something rude or I'm behaving weirdly or I'm not being respectful and understanding of other people's emotions, I felt like a horrible person. I was trying my best to be nice and empathetic but I couldn't do it. I thought there was genuinely something wrong with me and that I was broken and didn't deserve to live or have nice things because I was a bad person.
I also lied about a lot of things when I was a kid. It was mostly little things but I felt overwhelmingly guilty about it. So I started punishing myself the only way I knew how- restricting my food intake. Everytime I felt that I was not behaving properly or being a good girl, I didn't eat. I lost a lot of weight and had to be hospitalized. I take a lot of vitamin supplements now and everytime I feel that I've been "bad" I don't take my tablets because a bad person doesn't deserve to recover.
Last year I decided that I would start being a little nicer to myself and not self-sabotage like this but I couldn't do it. I thought that I was a bad person who can't even empathise with people and since I was a child I've been taught that my sole purpose as a human was to help others and I can't even say a few nice words to a friend who was crying so I didn't deserve to live.
Now that I know I'm autistic, I have realised that there's nothing wrong with me. I'm not a bad person. I'm just autistic. The "lies" I told were just masking and I wasn't trying to hurt anyone. I was born like this and there's a lot people like me who struggle the same way.
And now suddenly I find it so much easier to be kinder to myself. I can't suddenly stop restricting my food intake but it makes it so much easier to realise that I'm not bad. It's the first step in a long road to recovery but I'm so happy and relieved to know I'm autistic.

Indore, the commercial capital of Madhya Pradesh, is a vibrant city bustling with life and energy. As the city grows, so does the need for transportation services. One of the most convenient and reliable modes of transportation in Indore is the cab service. In this blog post, we will explore the cab service in Indore and how it is benefiting the people of the city.
Cab services in Indore offer a comfortable, safe, and convenient mode of transportation. They are particularly useful for people who are new to the city or those who do not own a car. With the availability of cab services, one can easily travel from one place to another without having to worry about the traffic, parking, and other hassles that come with driving in a busy city.
The cab services in Indore are operated by several companies, including Ola, Uber, and others. These companies offer a range of services, including mini cabs, sedans, and luxury cars. They also have different pricing models, such as fixed fares, metered fares, and distance-based fares, to cater to the different needs of their customers.
Also Read: Taxi from Indore to Bhopal
One of the biggest advantages of using cab services in Indore is the convenience factor. With the rise of technology and mobile apps, cab services can be easily booked and tracked through the app on your smartphone. This means that you don't have to wait on the road and hail a cab. Instead, you can simply book a ride from the comfort of your home or office and get picked up at your desired location.
Another benefit of using cab services in Indore is safety. The cab companies ensure that their drivers are properly trained and licensed, and they also conduct background checks to ensure that the drivers have a clean record. Additionally, the cabs are equipped with GPS tracking systems, which help in monitoring the location of the cab and ensuring the safety of the passengers.
Cab services in Indore also help in reducing traffic congestion in the city. With more people opting for cab services instead of driving their own cars, the number of cars on the road reduces, which in turn, reduces traffic congestion. This helps in reducing the carbon footprint of the city and makes it a more sustainable place to live.
In conclusion, cab services in Indore have made transportation in the city much more convenient, safe, and comfortable. With the availability of different types of cabs, pricing models, and booking options, cab services have become an essential part of the city's transportation ecosystem. If you are visiting Indore or live in the city, be sure to explore the cab services and experience the convenience they offer.

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explaining alien human people. "The LORD God said to the serpent, “Because you have done this, cursed are you above all livestock and above all beasts of the field; on your belly you shall go, and dust you shall eat all the days of your life. [I WILL PUT ENMITY BETWEEN YOU AND THE WOMAN, AND BETWEEN YOUR OFFSPRING AND HER OFFSPRING]; He shall bruise your head, and you shall bruise his heel.” ~ Genesis 3:14-15 "And whereas thou sawest iron mixed with miry clay, [they shall mingle themselves with the seed of men]: but they shall not cleave one to another, even as iron is not mixed with clay." ~ Daniel 2:43 "But while men slept, his enemy came and sowed tares among the wheat and went his way. But when the grain had sprouted and produced a crop, then the tares also appeared. So the servants of the owner came and said to him, ‘Sir, did you not sow good seed in your field? How then does it have tares?’ He said to them, ‘An enemy has done this.’ The servants said to him, ‘Do you want us then to go and gather them up?’ But he said, ‘No, lest while you gather up the tares you also uproot the wheat with them. Let both grow together until the harvest, and at the time of harvest I will say to the reapers, “First gather together the tares and bind them in bundles to burn them, but gather the wheat into my barn.” ~ Matthew 13:25-30 "For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the [COSMIC POWERS] over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the [HEAVENLY PLACES]." ~ Ephesians 6:12. since this makes it clear it is happening. whether you believe or not for this question just answer hypothetically even it its not true does this mean that black people are the seeds of lizards, since we are hated more than all other races of people. if so will blacks one day slither on our stomachs since that's one of the curses. whether you believe or not for this question just answer hypothetically even it its not true, like lets say even if its not if you pretend it is true, would that curse apply to his offspring if they were part human.

Two of my main characters look Indian and another one is black. How do I describe them without sounding racist as heck. I'm very white, please help.
Also, on a related note, I accidentally made the black character a morally iffy criminal. They are sympathetic and we don't see a TON of them committing crimes, but they're first appearance is tricking an entire town.
I don't want to do a major fuck up. Especially because the races of the characters does matter in the story.
(I say "look" because they're in a fantasy world, so they don't have the culture, just the skin tone.)

You are to the point where on your lives you look uncomfortably unhealthy. Just the look of your struggling to do certain things without being winded or breaking out in a sweat should scare you. You know you’re unhealthy.
You truly need to go to a dr. I know you got some type of insurance with all the other gvt assistance you have. Go get your labs drawn. Your cholesterol is probably high, your cortisol levels are probably high, and the way you drink alcohol is benefiting you in no positive ways on top of those things.
If you truly care about those boys try to get healthy for THEM if not for yourself. Your health is terrible for you to be 28 years old. Imagine yourself in 5 years if you continue at the rate you’re going:
3x the size you are now… having to do lives on a couch vs a chair… still punching the phone… Myson and Alijah raising themselves even MORE than they do now. As much as you swear you have haters how about you prove them wrong by trying to do right!!!! Or do you truly not care and love the struggle you’re in and the attention you get from it?

Hi, 32M here, currently with improved lifestyle (mild alcohol 1-2 per week, cardio, sports 2 times a week, I dont lift since it never brought me any results and it is hard to keep up the motivation) and a long history of ups and downs in penis sensitivity, delayed ejaculation, erectile dysfunction, depressions. I was a heavy drinker (each day several glasses 4-5 years back), did not care that much about myself, was in a toxic relationship that only supported the depression. Finally found a new girl and went to urologist last September since my problems with ED and DE were seemingly diminished but I still felt like shit. Found out I am borderline low T (265 ng/dl), 1.8 LH, 9.2 FSH, slightly smaller than average testicles, varicocele grade 2. According to my urologist this is pointing to primary hypogonadism acquired long ago. It all started to make sense and since I wanna have kids, went for SA (again, borderline low results, doctors suggested IVF with such numbers), went for varicocele surgery. Erections and libido got slightly better but I feel the inevitability of TRT (urologist prescribed me the androgel to test it for one month and felt significantly better). Nevertheless I know it will further lower down the production of sperm. And definitely the top purpose in life for me is to take care of a family someday. There is HCG replacement, I know. But I'm just scared that it wont be that successful due to the long duration of my issues. Urologist also mentioned anastrozole for temporarily boosting my SA (and cryopreserving) but again not sure that will work. Partner is very supportive but not entirely happy about it of course we would prefer conceiving naturally. Anyone walked a similar path? Any insight on how you dealt with such situation?

Hi everyone, I hope this is the right sub for this kind of question. I am about to graduate college this May as an economics major and I recently just accepted a job at a reinsurance company as an entry level catastrophe modeling analyst. Even though I've already accepted the job , I do have some questions.

1. What does career growth and salary growth usually look like (they are starting me at $65k)? I am pretty sure I've read on this sub or others that it is easy for cat modelers to get "stuck" where they are. Is that true?
2. What are the exit opportunities after spending a couple of years in cat modeling within insurance/reinsurance?
3. How hard or unheard of is it to move into an actuarial or underwriting position after cat modeling?

Even if you may not have answers to any of these questions I would love to hear any insights you might be able to give me about the world of cat modeling and its relation to the world of actuaries.