Milwaukee county zoo exhibits
414: Brew City
2009.09.17 21:39 tsondie21 414: Brew City
MKE, Cream City, Mil-town, Brew City, The Good Land.
2023.03.25 05:37 yalchyy Planet Zoo Tapir Exhibit(Sally the Tapir)
 | submitted by yalchyy to PlanetZoo [link] [comments] |
2023.03.25 05:36 Sure_Temporary_4559 Jurassic World Evolution 2 Wish List
 | Since we've gotten a full look at the new feathered dinosaur pack and the free update coming up next week, I wanted to make a post about my wish list for the game, for the remaining year. Since I think Frontier is supporting the game up through calendar year 2023 there should hopefully be some more DLC launching this year, especially with the Jurassic Park film 30th anniversary coming up this summer. submitted by Sure_Temporary_4559 to jurassicworldevo [link] [comments] I know everything here won't get put into the game but it's fun to put this stuff out there and have conversations and speculation about it. Rides and Attractions: Roller Coasters: There are in universe and real world attractions they could add for the 30th anniversary, just as a fun nod as to how far the franchise has come since the novels and movie first came out. JP: The Game has the Bone Shaker ride, which could be a smaller roller coaster and Universal Studios has the Velocicoaster which could be used as a larger placeable coaster. Water Rides/Water Park: Again, there are in universe and real world rides that could be used as attractions. There is the Cretaceous Cruise (Kayaks) from Jurassic World and the real world Universal Studios JP/JW Ride. A side note, the concept art for the JP Ride can also be seen in the original film during the lunch scene. Also, when looking at JW concept art for the film, there are water park elements such as pools and water slides that could be added. I think these would be cool additions for anyone who wanted to make a park more along the lines of Sea World or something similar. I think they could also add water park decorations that would add more authenticity. Other Rides: There is an unused helicopter tour ride that never got put in at Universal. It was I believe supposed to be more of a simulator ride but can be easily adapted into an actual helicopter ride for the game. I'm not sure where the concept for the larger tour car came from but it would be cool to see alternative tour cars much like how we can select alternate skins for the RangeMVU vehicles. And then I think the last ride I can think of is the hang gliding attraction that we saw in Camp Cretaceous, I'm not sure how it would work in game but it is another attraction that can be added. And then in some of the concept art I found you can also see some kid rides and something that looks like a ski-lift, the kid rides can be easily placeable if you wanted to make a kids zone and the ski-lift is something that could also add to our park transportation rating. Exhibits and Decorations: Smaller Enclosures: With the addition of smaller species of dinosaurs and other pre-historic animals into the game, I would like to see an emphasis on smaller enclosures. I know we're not getting juvenile dinosaurs but I would still like to see actual placeable smaller fencing, walls, or glass boarders. And then also perhaps some type of overlook viewing platform instead of having to place a large viewing gallery; this would make for more natural looking exhibits and walking areas instead of trying to fit an actual building in somewhere. I think they could borrow from Planet Zoo a bit and use smaller enclosed exhibits for very tiny examples such as the Compy's and Moros, as they can be very hard to see sometimes during the game when in a larger enclosure. Specialized Aquarium and Aviary Enclosures: Much in line still with the smaller enclosures, I would like for a revamped aquarium to be added to the game. I think this would be a great opportunity to showcase smaller marine animals that may get lost in the details in a larger lagoon enclosure. Still sticking with smaller enclosures, I think it would be cool if Frontier could bring back the greenhouse from the first game and re-use it as a small aviary for any smaller species of flying pre-historic animals. This again would help anyone to build more specialized areas and help dot their parks with smaller exhibits along the way instead of having to build big lagoon or aviary enclosures. Lagoons: I'm not going to go into too much detail about lagoons since we're all in agreement about wanting increased paint tools and decorations. Just wanted to emphasize that I also want to see underwater walking areas and dome viewing galleries like we're seeing being added next or like the rotunda from JP: The Game. Amenities and Decorations: Buildings: I wouldn't mind some older buildings from the first game coming back. Along with the greenhouse I wouldn't mind having the bar building come back and give another guest amenity or have smaller bar type buildings; maybe some time of Tiki lounge for beaches or other exhibits. Along those same lines, I would like to see some food carts or smaller food/drink stands to be added, I think it would make a lot of sense to add these as placeable items in the park, again, not having to worry about placing larger buildings throughout the park. Decorations: Any and all decorations would be welcome such as topiary and statues. Benches, trashcans, more flags and light posts, etc. I would also like to see more decorations like the sails for the lagoon and awnings/tents that can be placed throughout the park. And of course any more updates to foliage and terrain tools is always welcome, I know we're getting updates to foliage decorations but just saying this, if there is any other styles they could add. Another way they could add to decorations is if they add different building styles in a larger DLC, they could do this since Jurassic Park Europe was a concept from the film and Jurassic Park Japan was a concept from the novel. They could add in decoration/foliage items that are European or Japanese inspired and would add another layer of customization to the game for park builders. New Dinosaurs: I can't think of a lot at this time based on new animals to add since I think there are a decent amount of animals in the game already and my wish list is more for the theme park side of things. I think new skins for a lot of the variants that only have one, such as the BABR Allosaurus, would be great like when we got new skins for the Dominion Giga. A few of the specific animals I had in mind were: Archaeopteryx Microceratus (Dominion) Tarbosaurus (Camp Cretaceous) Argentinosaurus Mapusaurus Various Aquatic and Flying Animals (Any era is fine, the list for those animals needs to be expanded more) Pre-Historic Alligator or Crocodilian Animals (I think these would be a great edition to the game and would make a swamp build that much more fun) Hybrids (I could take or leave the hybrids even though I really like the Spinoraptor. I don't use them much in my own park builds though) Pleistocene Animals (We got the Saber-tooth Tiger in CC and I think other animals from this era would be a great edition but it is understandable if they don't get added in. Maybe in JWE 3 hint hint wink wink) I think that's pretty much it for my wish list. If I had to make a prediction for the next big DLC coming out more than likely a lot of original movie related items, some possible items related to novels, and maybe some missing Camp Cretaceous content, there was also the tree house that could be another attraction and the roller coaster in the interactive episode that could also be an attraction added. https://preview.redd.it/00wliajsrtpa1.jpg?width=736&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dd5f4c766caeb10fe123fd07dc129c35556dc12b |
2023.03.25 02:07 alexdionisos Never noticed this Schreckengost display sign at the zoo until now
 | submitted by alexdionisos to Cleveland [link] [comments] |
2023.03.24 23:05 HairlessCarat Staff per habitats
Currently my zoo is doing alright overall except for my staff. For some reason my mechanics and keepers never respond to urgent calls. Currently my staff to enclosure setup is 2 mechanics, 2 keepers, 2 vets for 3 enclosures (I haven't bothered with exhibits cause they're to unmanageable for me) I have them all sectioned out and all my staff has make happiness, almost all are max trained and ALWAYS on efficient workload. So what is going on?? why does it take them literally a whole year to respond to a broken enclosure or letting things get so dirty even when I emergency call them.
submitted by HairlessCarat to PlanetZoo [link] [comments]
2023.03.24 21:16 twenty_liu When my father died, he left me a box of cassette tapes. I wish I'd never listened to them.
The last time I saw my father, my priorities in life were figuring out which houses on my street would be giving out the full-size candy bars, or how to score an invitation to Samantha’s birthday party at the zoo. So when I received news that he had died, I didn’t feel sad. I didn’t feel much of anything.
My brother, he had moved to London to be closer to his wife’s family and mom passed away a few years ago. Breast cancer. I don’t often think about my father but in those last months I’d thought about him a lot. I had to stay an extra year to finish up my degree and by the time I had graduated only my brother brought flowers to the ceremony.
So it came as a complete surprise when I found out that my father was not only a well-respected psychologist, with books and everything to his name, but also a well-respected psychologist who had left his entire estate to me. An actual mansion (albeit in Maine) with the eight bedrooms and those lawn hedges that needed frequent trimmings. I guess he never remarried either.
I’ve been living at the mansion for about a week now, going through his old things, tidying up where I can. It feels invasive in a way, and nosy, because I’m really just his daughter in namesake only. The mansion itself is like something out of a Disney movie; there are these white marble, twin staircases that wrap around the entrance when you first walk in and I’m still finding new corridors and doors that lead to rooms I haven’t seen. The main living room (there are a total of three) echos when you talk just above a whisper and a single bedroom in this place is about the size of my apartment back in LA.
Despite all that, I decided pretty quickly that I wanted to sell this place, not just because this is way too much space for one person, but because there’s something about it that gives me the creeps. It’s not run down or anything; no cobwebs in the corners or rotting wood beams, and if there are stairs that lead to a basement torture chamber, I haven’t found them yet.
No, it’s because there are these giant velvet wall hangings with some sort of crest or symbol on them that I don’t recognize. There’s a circle and in the middle there’s an assortment of rectangles and a line running through them, looking almost like a circuit board– I’ll be the first to admit I’m not the best at describing these things. One wall hanging, I could understand. But why are they in every single room, draped over chairs and blocking out windows?
And then there are the framed portraits. I found one that must’ve been my father; he vaguely resembled the man I remembered and I could see my eyes in his. But the other photos, men and women of all races ranging from early twenties to what looked like eighty. Who were they? There must’ve been about a hundred or so of these photos, placed all over the mansion and even a week later I’m still discovering new ones in the oddest places. Just yesterday night, I was reading on my phone when a noise outside startled me. When I went to pick up my phone, I found another portrait under the bed.
On top of that I’m a city girl through and through, and here, you get blank stares just mentioning the word “traffic”. It’s also about a twenty minute drive to the nearest grocery store, and all of the houses around me might as well have their own zip codes.
But it was what I found tonight that was by far the most unnerving. I’d just finished dinner - Mac and Cheese with cut up hotdogs - a dish that felt almost insulting to the kitchen it was made in, when I decided I’d spend some time tonight organizing more of my father's things. I had KEEP, DONATE, SELL, and TRASH piles with the KEEP pile looking the most lonely by far.
There was one room I hadn’t spent much time in, that I had only peeked in for a brief moment when I first arrived. Judging by the handsome mahogany desk, the floor-to-wall bookshelves and the velvet green chaise lounge and leather chair, it was unmistakably my father’s office. There was something about this room that I wanted to save for last and there was no real reason for it, nothing I could express in words, anyways.
The room had been arranged with obvious care. I felt a sense of familiarity when I walked in, traced my fingers across these books I’d never heard of, wondered if my father had actually read of all them or if they were for display only. But it was what was tucked under his desk that caught my attention, a cardboard box with a single word scribbled on it.
CATHERINE
My name. My father wanted me to find this - but why?
I wasted no time in peeling off the packing tape, bracing myself for disappointment but hoping for something more. Well, it was a good thing I had prepared because I’d be lying if I said that I wasn’t a little let down by what was in the box.
Cassette tapes. Twenty or so cassette tapes, stacked neatly in rows and on top of each other. I pulled a few from the top and they were all labeled with names and a number - patients of my father, perhaps?
Now, I may be showing my age here but I’ve never actually used a cassette player. It was by method of deduction that I spotted one sitting on my father’s desk, and after consulting trusty old Google, I was able to play the first tape.
To protect the identity of his patients, I’m going to use initials here. But I wanted to transcribe this session because while I’ve never been to therapy myself, something about this feels off to me. This is the tape that’s been labeled “RT 1”.
BEGIN TRANSCRIPT
Dr. Ashton: Good afternoon. I’m Dr. Ashton, you must be R.
RT: (Ahem) Yes. Yes I am.
Dr. Ashton: Well R, the floor is all yours. Would you like to talk about what’s been on your mind?
RT: I’m a bit nervous right now, if you couldn’t tell. (Laughs) Too much caffeine this morning, that’s why my hands are shaky. See?
Dr. Ashton: Can’t blame you, coffee is what gets me through most days. I hope I’m not the one making you nervous, I promise my friends down at county jail all say I’m really nice.
RT: (Laughs) No! No it’s not you. It’s just uh, this is my first time doing this, y’know? My boyfriend he uh, he’s been kinda nagging me to do this, therapy.
Dr. Ashton: Mhm.
RT: It’s just. He wants us to come out to our families. It’s been a whole year, so I get where he’s coming from, I do. But my parents, my family. I don’t think they would…
Dr. Ashton: Support you. You don’t think they would understand.
RT: It’s not just that. My family, they uh. Think the term here is “religious fanatics”? (Laughs) Like straight up drank the Kool-Aid, think all sinners are going to Hell, burn in eternal damnation and all that.
Dr. Ashton: But you don’t believe in any of that.
RT: Of course not! I mean, c’mon. It’s 2019. You’d think that by now people can think for themselves.
Dr. Ashton: So it sounds like your family, they have some views you don’t agree with. And it’s causing issues in your relationship. Have you thought about putting some distance? Between you and them.
RT: Yeah. We talked about moving outta this place, to New York or maybe Seattle. That would be nice, I think. Different. But my mom, she uh. Well she has Alzheimer's. And I know in a few years she’s not going to… going to all be there. I know, right? If she knew I were gay she’d tell me I’m going to burn in Hell without even blinking. But she’s still my mom. Woman who raised me. Must be all that Catholic guilt in me. (Laughs)
Dr. Ashton: Tell me about your partner. How’d you two meet?
RT: Grindr. Romantic right? (Laughs) Neither of us were really looking for anything serious, but when you’re one of like 100 gay men within a 50 mile radius and you meet someone you actually click with? It was just supposed to be drinks, our first date. Then one bar turned to two, then three, and before you know it, it’s 4 in the morning and we’re getting burgers and milkshakes at Denny’s. I think the both of us knew what we had found.
Dr. Ashton: And how’s the relationship been? Any issues besides…
RT: Besides the one thing that’d destroy my relationship with my family? Ha! Things are nice, they’ve been good. I work nights and he works a 9 to 5 so our schedules don’t always line up but… we make it work.
Dr. Ashton: Am I sensing some hesitation there?
RT: Nothing gets past you doctor.
Dr. Ashton: Please, call me Gabriel.
RT: Oh uh, sure. But yeah it’s just that… okay so, I like my job. I work security at the hospital and I know it’s not the most prestigious thing in the world and I’m not making the big bucks. But I like it. I’ve always been more of uh, more of a night owl. And I really like my coworkers, y’know? It just feels familiar to me.
Dr. Ashton: Mhm.
RT: But M. He… he wants me to quit. To find something with more “normal hours”.
Dr. Ashton: Why does he want that?
RT: I guess it’s because he wants us to spend more time together? I don’t know. I think it’s sweet that he wants to see me more. We don’t live together right now and uh, it’s really only the weekends when we can see each other.
Dr. Ashton: And you’re okay with that? Only seeing him on the weekends?
RT: I mean, no. I want to see him more too. But it’s my job, you know? I’m not just gonna quit my job. And well, to be honest I’ve always had the feeling that… that he…
Dr. Ashton: That he?
RT: … that he looks down on it? I’m not sure. I don’t know if it’s in my head or… He’s never said anything to me, just wanna be clear. But when we’re out with his friends, he makes these little… little comments. Am I making any sense?
Dr. Ashton: Can you give an example? Of these comments.
RT: Yeah like uh, he’ll say stuff about how he’s the sugar daddy in the relationship. Jokingly, of course. He does make a lot more than me. What with his fancy remote job. We’re not living together right now but it’s something we've talked about. And I know you have to discuss finances before moving in with someone, I get that. But he’s always bringing up how he wants a partner to contribute equally to bills, that he doesn’t want to be supporting anyone. I get all of that! But it’s just something about the way he says it…
Dr. Ashton: Do you feel like these comments are digs at your character? At you?
RT: Honestly? Yeah I do. Like if he has a problem with how much I’m making, just tell me. We’re both adults right? Gotta communicate and all that?
Dr. Ashton: It almost sounds like he’s ashamed of you.
RT: You know what? I think that’s exactly it. I think he might be ashamed of me.
Dr. Ashton: So M, he wants you to tell your family about your relationship, even though that’s not what you want to do.
RT: …yeah….
Dr. Ashton: And he looks down on your job, makes these comments in front of his friends. Do you ever wonder what he says to them when you’re not there?
RT: Well…
Dr. Ashton: R, it sounds like people have always been telling you what to do, your family telling you what to believe in, M telling you that you need to go to therapy, you need to find a different job. Doesn’t that get exhausting?
RT: …
Dr. Ashton: It sounds exhausting to me. Can I tell you something that I learned way too late in life?
RT: What’s that?
Dr. Ashton: “No” is a complete sentence. It’s okay to set boundaries, especially with those closest to you.
RT: I… I guess you’re right.
Dr. Ashton: And R? I don’t know if anyone’s ever told you this, or even if you think this about yourself. But I’m going to tell you right now, that you are enough.
RT: No one’s ever said that to me.
Dr. Ashton: Can you say it to yourself right now?
RT: Ha. Yeah uh, I… I am enough?
Dr. Ashton: There are always going to be outside influences R, like a close-minded family or a partner that doesn’t see your potential. But what’s important is that you see it in yourself. Because I see it in you. I see a man who has passion for what he does, who values the bonds of family, who desires to love and to be loved. A man who’s deserving.
RT: I… I’ve never really thought of myself in that way Dr. Ash– Gabriel.
Dr. Ashton: Well, that’s what I’m here for, R. To offer a new perspective. To help you see these things that you might not even have known.
RT: Wow, yeah. I mean. I just… You’ve given me a lot to think about. Really.
Dr. Ashton: And right on schedule, it looks like our time is up. I’ll be seeing you again next week? Same time?
RT: Yeah. Yeah I think I’ll be seeing you again.
END TRANSCRIPT
I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t nice to hear my father’s voice again. A longing I didn’t even know I had. It had been so many years, yet hearing him brought me back to chasing ice cream trucks in the summer, flying kites on those especially windy days.
The therapy session itself, I’m no expert but it was a little weird, right? A little too personal? If anyone has more experience with this I’d love to know your thoughts because I plan on going through all of these tapes.
submitted by twenty_liu to nosleep [link] [comments]
My brother, he had moved to London to be closer to his wife’s family and mom passed away a few years ago. Breast cancer. I don’t often think about my father but in those last months I’d thought about him a lot. I had to stay an extra year to finish up my degree and by the time I had graduated only my brother brought flowers to the ceremony.
So it came as a complete surprise when I found out that my father was not only a well-respected psychologist, with books and everything to his name, but also a well-respected psychologist who had left his entire estate to me. An actual mansion (albeit in Maine) with the eight bedrooms and those lawn hedges that needed frequent trimmings. I guess he never remarried either.
I’ve been living at the mansion for about a week now, going through his old things, tidying up where I can. It feels invasive in a way, and nosy, because I’m really just his daughter in namesake only. The mansion itself is like something out of a Disney movie; there are these white marble, twin staircases that wrap around the entrance when you first walk in and I’m still finding new corridors and doors that lead to rooms I haven’t seen. The main living room (there are a total of three) echos when you talk just above a whisper and a single bedroom in this place is about the size of my apartment back in LA.
Despite all that, I decided pretty quickly that I wanted to sell this place, not just because this is way too much space for one person, but because there’s something about it that gives me the creeps. It’s not run down or anything; no cobwebs in the corners or rotting wood beams, and if there are stairs that lead to a basement torture chamber, I haven’t found them yet.
No, it’s because there are these giant velvet wall hangings with some sort of crest or symbol on them that I don’t recognize. There’s a circle and in the middle there’s an assortment of rectangles and a line running through them, looking almost like a circuit board– I’ll be the first to admit I’m not the best at describing these things. One wall hanging, I could understand. But why are they in every single room, draped over chairs and blocking out windows?
And then there are the framed portraits. I found one that must’ve been my father; he vaguely resembled the man I remembered and I could see my eyes in his. But the other photos, men and women of all races ranging from early twenties to what looked like eighty. Who were they? There must’ve been about a hundred or so of these photos, placed all over the mansion and even a week later I’m still discovering new ones in the oddest places. Just yesterday night, I was reading on my phone when a noise outside startled me. When I went to pick up my phone, I found another portrait under the bed.
On top of that I’m a city girl through and through, and here, you get blank stares just mentioning the word “traffic”. It’s also about a twenty minute drive to the nearest grocery store, and all of the houses around me might as well have their own zip codes.
But it was what I found tonight that was by far the most unnerving. I’d just finished dinner - Mac and Cheese with cut up hotdogs - a dish that felt almost insulting to the kitchen it was made in, when I decided I’d spend some time tonight organizing more of my father's things. I had KEEP, DONATE, SELL, and TRASH piles with the KEEP pile looking the most lonely by far.
There was one room I hadn’t spent much time in, that I had only peeked in for a brief moment when I first arrived. Judging by the handsome mahogany desk, the floor-to-wall bookshelves and the velvet green chaise lounge and leather chair, it was unmistakably my father’s office. There was something about this room that I wanted to save for last and there was no real reason for it, nothing I could express in words, anyways.
The room had been arranged with obvious care. I felt a sense of familiarity when I walked in, traced my fingers across these books I’d never heard of, wondered if my father had actually read of all them or if they were for display only. But it was what was tucked under his desk that caught my attention, a cardboard box with a single word scribbled on it.
CATHERINE
My name. My father wanted me to find this - but why?
I wasted no time in peeling off the packing tape, bracing myself for disappointment but hoping for something more. Well, it was a good thing I had prepared because I’d be lying if I said that I wasn’t a little let down by what was in the box.
Cassette tapes. Twenty or so cassette tapes, stacked neatly in rows and on top of each other. I pulled a few from the top and they were all labeled with names and a number - patients of my father, perhaps?
Now, I may be showing my age here but I’ve never actually used a cassette player. It was by method of deduction that I spotted one sitting on my father’s desk, and after consulting trusty old Google, I was able to play the first tape.
To protect the identity of his patients, I’m going to use initials here. But I wanted to transcribe this session because while I’ve never been to therapy myself, something about this feels off to me. This is the tape that’s been labeled “RT 1”.
BEGIN TRANSCRIPT
Dr. Ashton: Good afternoon. I’m Dr. Ashton, you must be R.
RT: (Ahem) Yes. Yes I am.
Dr. Ashton: Well R, the floor is all yours. Would you like to talk about what’s been on your mind?
RT: I’m a bit nervous right now, if you couldn’t tell. (Laughs) Too much caffeine this morning, that’s why my hands are shaky. See?
Dr. Ashton: Can’t blame you, coffee is what gets me through most days. I hope I’m not the one making you nervous, I promise my friends down at county jail all say I’m really nice.
RT: (Laughs) No! No it’s not you. It’s just uh, this is my first time doing this, y’know? My boyfriend he uh, he’s been kinda nagging me to do this, therapy.
Dr. Ashton: Mhm.
RT: It’s just. He wants us to come out to our families. It’s been a whole year, so I get where he’s coming from, I do. But my parents, my family. I don’t think they would…
Dr. Ashton: Support you. You don’t think they would understand.
RT: It’s not just that. My family, they uh. Think the term here is “religious fanatics”? (Laughs) Like straight up drank the Kool-Aid, think all sinners are going to Hell, burn in eternal damnation and all that.
Dr. Ashton: But you don’t believe in any of that.
RT: Of course not! I mean, c’mon. It’s 2019. You’d think that by now people can think for themselves.
Dr. Ashton: So it sounds like your family, they have some views you don’t agree with. And it’s causing issues in your relationship. Have you thought about putting some distance? Between you and them.
RT: Yeah. We talked about moving outta this place, to New York or maybe Seattle. That would be nice, I think. Different. But my mom, she uh. Well she has Alzheimer's. And I know in a few years she’s not going to… going to all be there. I know, right? If she knew I were gay she’d tell me I’m going to burn in Hell without even blinking. But she’s still my mom. Woman who raised me. Must be all that Catholic guilt in me. (Laughs)
Dr. Ashton: Tell me about your partner. How’d you two meet?
RT: Grindr. Romantic right? (Laughs) Neither of us were really looking for anything serious, but when you’re one of like 100 gay men within a 50 mile radius and you meet someone you actually click with? It was just supposed to be drinks, our first date. Then one bar turned to two, then three, and before you know it, it’s 4 in the morning and we’re getting burgers and milkshakes at Denny’s. I think the both of us knew what we had found.
Dr. Ashton: And how’s the relationship been? Any issues besides…
RT: Besides the one thing that’d destroy my relationship with my family? Ha! Things are nice, they’ve been good. I work nights and he works a 9 to 5 so our schedules don’t always line up but… we make it work.
Dr. Ashton: Am I sensing some hesitation there?
RT: Nothing gets past you doctor.
Dr. Ashton: Please, call me Gabriel.
RT: Oh uh, sure. But yeah it’s just that… okay so, I like my job. I work security at the hospital and I know it’s not the most prestigious thing in the world and I’m not making the big bucks. But I like it. I’ve always been more of uh, more of a night owl. And I really like my coworkers, y’know? It just feels familiar to me.
Dr. Ashton: Mhm.
RT: But M. He… he wants me to quit. To find something with more “normal hours”.
Dr. Ashton: Why does he want that?
RT: I guess it’s because he wants us to spend more time together? I don’t know. I think it’s sweet that he wants to see me more. We don’t live together right now and uh, it’s really only the weekends when we can see each other.
Dr. Ashton: And you’re okay with that? Only seeing him on the weekends?
RT: I mean, no. I want to see him more too. But it’s my job, you know? I’m not just gonna quit my job. And well, to be honest I’ve always had the feeling that… that he…
Dr. Ashton: That he?
RT: … that he looks down on it? I’m not sure. I don’t know if it’s in my head or… He’s never said anything to me, just wanna be clear. But when we’re out with his friends, he makes these little… little comments. Am I making any sense?
Dr. Ashton: Can you give an example? Of these comments.
RT: Yeah like uh, he’ll say stuff about how he’s the sugar daddy in the relationship. Jokingly, of course. He does make a lot more than me. What with his fancy remote job. We’re not living together right now but it’s something we've talked about. And I know you have to discuss finances before moving in with someone, I get that. But he’s always bringing up how he wants a partner to contribute equally to bills, that he doesn’t want to be supporting anyone. I get all of that! But it’s just something about the way he says it…
Dr. Ashton: Do you feel like these comments are digs at your character? At you?
RT: Honestly? Yeah I do. Like if he has a problem with how much I’m making, just tell me. We’re both adults right? Gotta communicate and all that?
Dr. Ashton: It almost sounds like he’s ashamed of you.
RT: You know what? I think that’s exactly it. I think he might be ashamed of me.
Dr. Ashton: So M, he wants you to tell your family about your relationship, even though that’s not what you want to do.
RT: …yeah….
Dr. Ashton: And he looks down on your job, makes these comments in front of his friends. Do you ever wonder what he says to them when you’re not there?
RT: Well…
Dr. Ashton: R, it sounds like people have always been telling you what to do, your family telling you what to believe in, M telling you that you need to go to therapy, you need to find a different job. Doesn’t that get exhausting?
RT: …
Dr. Ashton: It sounds exhausting to me. Can I tell you something that I learned way too late in life?
RT: What’s that?
Dr. Ashton: “No” is a complete sentence. It’s okay to set boundaries, especially with those closest to you.
RT: I… I guess you’re right.
Dr. Ashton: And R? I don’t know if anyone’s ever told you this, or even if you think this about yourself. But I’m going to tell you right now, that you are enough.
RT: No one’s ever said that to me.
Dr. Ashton: Can you say it to yourself right now?
RT: Ha. Yeah uh, I… I am enough?
Dr. Ashton: There are always going to be outside influences R, like a close-minded family or a partner that doesn’t see your potential. But what’s important is that you see it in yourself. Because I see it in you. I see a man who has passion for what he does, who values the bonds of family, who desires to love and to be loved. A man who’s deserving.
RT: I… I’ve never really thought of myself in that way Dr. Ash– Gabriel.
Dr. Ashton: Well, that’s what I’m here for, R. To offer a new perspective. To help you see these things that you might not even have known.
RT: Wow, yeah. I mean. I just… You’ve given me a lot to think about. Really.
Dr. Ashton: And right on schedule, it looks like our time is up. I’ll be seeing you again next week? Same time?
RT: Yeah. Yeah I think I’ll be seeing you again.
END TRANSCRIPT
I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t nice to hear my father’s voice again. A longing I didn’t even know I had. It had been so many years, yet hearing him brought me back to chasing ice cream trucks in the summer, flying kites on those especially windy days.
The therapy session itself, I’m no expert but it was a little weird, right? A little too personal? If anyone has more experience with this I’d love to know your thoughts because I plan on going through all of these tapes.
2023.03.24 20:52 aydenaroo Does this little aviary type thing look as bad as I think it does?
 | submitted by aydenaroo to PlanetZoo [link] [comments] |
2023.03.24 20:50 tonnie_taller Wisconsin man who shot cop, stole and wrecked squad car gets 40 years
A man who pleaded guilty to shooting a Milwaukee police officer and stealing his squad car last year has been sentenced to 40 years in prison. A Milwaukee County judge sentenced Jetrin Rodthong, 23, on Thursday for shooting Officer Herbert Davis III as the officer was investigating a report about a sick or injured motorist. … Continue reading Wisconsin man who shot cop, stole and wrecked squad car gets 40 years
submitted by tonnie_taller to Tonnie_Taller [link] [comments]
2023.03.24 20:21 Bomdabom In 2016 a zoo in California was facing allegations of animal mistreatment and cruelty. Reports from both staff and visitors described the animals as being sickly. Cries could also be heard from the exhibits, especially during closing hours. Allegations would continue until the zoo’s closure in 2019.
 | submitted by Bomdabom to oddbox [link] [comments] |
2023.03.24 18:20 tonnie_taller Howard Brandston, Who Made His Mark With Light, Dies at 87
His light design company has applied his art globally to landmarks, including the Statue of Liberty, as well as architecture, exhibitions and even penguins in a zoo.. Arts
submitted by tonnie_taller to Tonnie_Taller [link] [comments]
2023.03.24 18:02 supercontra IROAST
 | submitted by supercontra to Killtony [link] [comments] |
2023.03.24 17:35 TaPele_ Frontier definitely nailed it with including the sloth as an walk-through exhibit animal
I think that if it had been a normal habitat animal it wouldn't have behaved as a real sloth: meaning, it would be moving all the time through the floor instead of simply spending 99% of their lives still on a tree as they do. For some reason I guess Frontier do not know how to code arboreal animals.
The walk-through exhibits made possible a much more realisitc sloth that would probably simply be hanging on a tree all day. I think Frontier should do the same with koalas. Maybe turning koalas into both a habitat an exhibit animal so people who already have a koala habitat do not get their zoos ruined.
submitted by TaPele_ to PlanetZoo [link] [comments]
The walk-through exhibits made possible a much more realisitc sloth that would probably simply be hanging on a tree all day. I think Frontier should do the same with koalas. Maybe turning koalas into both a habitat an exhibit animal so people who already have a koala habitat do not get their zoos ruined.
2023.03.24 16:00 _call-me-al_ [Fri, Mar 24 2023] TL;DR — This is what you missed in the last 24 hours on Reddit
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2023.03.24 15:31 rrmdp 📢 Aramark is hiring a Food Service Worker - Milwaukee County - Senior Meals Program!
submitted by rrmdp to jobboardsearch [link] [comments]2023.03.24 14:28 MackFenzie Shoot Your Shot: Algae Blooms part 4
This is a Nature of Predators Fanfic
First Previous
At their secluded table, Amelia looked at Glenil. His dappled, ash-grey fur draped across his eyes, though he never seemed to mind it, and his sweetly tufted ears showed that he was focusing on her. Now that she had his attention, she felt silly for feeling so insecure earlier. But the bartender had been right - she had to let him know what had gone on in her head, or else they’d never be able to get on the same page.
“Glenil, I have something to confess.”
“Glenil?” he repeated, flicking his ears uneasily. “You used my actual name. I know humans only use their loved one’s official names when they’re angry. What’s wrong?”
Amelia raised her eyebrows and smiled. “Babe, I’m not angry. Well, I guess I am serious. I need to talk to you about some uncomfortable feelings I had, that’s all.” She took a deep breath before she went on. “Look, I didn’t realize you used to date Jaisa. I’m glad you’re still friends, I really am, but I wish you’d told me in advance so that I didn’t find out from some guy who’d only just stopped flirting with me when I told him you were my mate.”
Glenil’s ears twisted uncomfortably. “I didn’t realize that history was relevant. We’re friends now, I thought that would be all you would care to know.”
“Well, I feel differently. I do notice it doesn’t upset you at all to hear some other guy was just flirting with me and trying to buy me a drink,” she pointed out.
“Of course not. Why would I be? You told him you were in a monogamous relationship, and he backed off.”
“Well,” she sighed. “I would have been. Upset, I mean. And, I trust you. I trust you implicitly. But I did feel jealous watching you walk away with Jaisa, and even more so once I realized you used to date.”
As she spoke, Glenil's body tensed. His ears flattened, and his tail straightened out with her every word. “So, what, you’re jealous I had a life before I met you? Is that the real reason you didn’t want to invite me here? You don’t want me around other females because it might make you jealous?”
Amelia’s eyes widened and she leaned back in her chair. “No, that’s not it at all, I just—“
"Do you know why we broke up? Jaisa was jealous. She’d get drunk and dive-bomb any female friends who dared even talk to me. Jealous! ‘Jealous’ is just a predator-shit way of saying ‘aggressive and isolating.’”
Amelia stared at her hands, clasped tightly on the table. He had never yelled at her before. Glenil was usually such a thoughtful and caring communicator. Her heart thrummed tightly in her chest. She desperately wished she didn’t have alcohol in her system for this conversation. She hadn’t realized this would be such a touchy topic for him.
Half of her brain wanted to apologize for bringing it up, tell him to forget she even said anything, and the other half wanted to scream at him. He thought her feelings were predator-shit? Only Venlil are allowed to have irrational, emotional responses to things, is that right? But even after a couple drinks, she knew that would only escalate the situation further, so instead, she closed her eyes, took a breath, and counted to ten.
“I can see,” Amelia said quietly. “That this is something you have strong feelings about. I’m thinking that I shouldn’t have brought this up when we’d both been drinking. I’m sorry. Can we pause the conversation, and talk about it when we’re sober tomorrow?”
Glenil blinked at her. “You’re not going to tell me that jealousy is how you show love, and I’m just too much of a stupid, frightened Venlil to understand that?”
“No, of course not. Especially when you’ve made it clear it doesn’t make you feel loved.”
“Oh.” Glenil’s ears gradually relaxed, and he extended his tail to wrap around her wrist apologetically. “Shit. I’m sorry, Amelia. I thought you were saying… well, something you apparently weren’t saying. If you want to pause this conversation and talk tomorrow, we can, but if you want to finish it now, I promise I’ll listen.”
She frowned at him anxiously, but decided to speak her piece. “I’m just saying, I don’t know if it’s my cultural background or the territorial traits in my DNA that make me feel that jealousy, but I do know that it’s 100% my responsibility to handle my own emotions. I don’t want you to feel guilty for having history, or to change how you live your life, let alone turn you into a recluse, but I do need to be able to trust that you’ll give me the information I need to not get blindsided with this stuff in social settings.”
“You’re saying you wish that I’d told you about my history with Jaisa?”
Amelia nodded.
Glenil flicked his ears. “I suppose that’s a reasonable request. Jaisa and I did court, although it was only a few months. We just weren’t a good match, romantically. We were good friends, but she wanted someone a little more... territorial. I wanted someone who was less territorial and possessive. We just made better friends than lovers. So you don’t need to feel afraid that I’m going to decide to go back to her.”
Amelia frowned. “Babe, I’m not afraid. It's just that when you came in and I saw the way you hugged, I could feel that there was more between the two of you than I’d been told. That uncertainty felt scary, like catching a glimpse of movement in the shadows. Because you don’t know what’s there, you can’t tell if it’s a threat or not. I knew I was missing information, that I was in the dark about something. I couldn’t tell if you were intentionally hiding something from me, if she had always been in love with you from afar and she was going to try to compete with me, or if I was just overreacting over a cultural difference, over nothing. And then, I had to find out that backstory from a stranger.”
Glenil’s ears tilted in sympathy. “I can understand that. You weren’t sure if you should be on your guard, or calming your emotional responses, and so you weren’t able to fully do either one.”
Amelia nodded. “Exactly. And like I said, I trust you. I love you so much, and I trust you, completely, with my whole heart. I’m going to feel jealous sometimes, and I can, will, and do manage my own emotions. I’m definitely going to feel my feelings, but I can promise I won’t lash out at you over them. All I need is to know that you’ll also try to be more open with me in the future. I just don’t want to be the last one in the room to know.”
Glenil squeezed her wrist gently. “I can promise I will try, although I can’t promise I will always realize what information would be important to you. Can we talk tomorrow about what kind of things I should keep in mind to share going forward?”
Amelia smiled gratefully. “I’d like that. And thank you for listening, and taking me seriously.”
“I’m sorry I overreacted at first. And thank you for being so level and emotionally literate even after a few drinks. The lack of dive-bombing is deeply appreciated.”
Amelia laughed at him and gave him a quick kiss. “I try. You know we start learning how to handle our emotions as toddlers, right?”
“Yes, dear, you sang me all your ‘Big Feelings Nursery Rhymes’ last time you got too drunk,” he told her drily.
She giggled, and took his hand in hers. “And it was music to your ears, I’m sure.”
Glenil flicked his ears in a laugh. “You were really cute explaining the use of rhyme and meter in your language. Well, should we go find our friends again?”
Amelia swiveled her head to scan the room. “Oh, gosh. They’re dancing. I don’t even know how they can dance to this, I can’t even find a beat. Let’s just stay over here, at least until I finish this,” she said, lifting her drink to eye level. “Hey, babe. To communication.”
He waved his tail happily and lifted his own glass. “To communication.” He took a sip of his drink, and then flicked his ears at the dance floor. “By the way, if you were wondering what Jaisa flirting actually looks like, take a look at her feathers. She’s showing off all her iridescence.”
“Oh! Well that’s nothing like how she was acting with you. I can admit that’s a relief to learn,” Amelia quipped, grinning. “I hope Mariah realizes that’s what it means. She might be into it, though, she’s got her attention completely focused on her.”
“I can see her and Jaisa getting along,” he pondered. “They’re both confident enough to handle each other.”
“Over at the bar, it looks like Krisim might have found a new target, too.” At her boyfriend’s disgusted look, she rolled her eyes. “Target for his affections, I mean. Don’t look at me like that, that phrase isn’t even predatory! I don’t know if Talva’s even interested in dating right now, though. Want to go see if she needs to be rescued?”
——————————————————————
When the song came to an end, Mariah and Jaisa slowed their bodies and noticed for the first time just how close they were dancing without touching.
“Does human music sound anything like this?” Jaisa asked Mariah breathlessly
“Much of our popular dance music is simpler than what’s playing here. I’d bet the rhythms from the music of my father’s people is like nothing you’ve heard before.”
“The music of your father’s people… human tribes have different music?”
“Of course! I’m Nigerian, so I grew up listening to African music, which is different than what Amelia would be used to hearing in America. My father is a musician. Or, he was, before…” Mariah shook her head sharply. She’d just felt so good dancing, and she did not want to fall apart in this bar. “Anyway. He played traditional Igbo music, which is known for its complex polyrhythms. If I hadn’t been used to that, I don’t know if I could have figured out the rhythmic structure of your music.”
“I’m so sorry for your loss, Mariah. And I’d like to hear that music. Whatever taught you to dance like that must be incredible,” Jaisa said with a warm sincerity that Mariah hadn’t heard from her before.
She led the way to a nearby perch and gracefully hopped up to match Mariah’s height. They glanced around and noticed for the first time that Talva had not followed them onto the dance floor, but was drinking at the bar with Krisim.
“Oh, she’d better be careful,” Jaisa chuckled. “Krisim’s always been a xenophile, and I noticed him lekking earlier.”
“Lekking?”
“Looking for a mate. Shifting his feathers to show off his colors, dancing and singing to compete for attention. Most of these guys are. The attention can be nice, but sometimes being around a lek is just exhausting.”
“I see. Humans do the same thing, although we describe it differently. I agree, it can be exhausting,” Mariah said.
“Oh!” Jaisa said, ruffling her own colorful feathers. “How do you describe it? Does it sound exotic and predatory?”
Mariah paused, one corner of her mouth raised in a half-grin. “Do you want to know if it is?”
Jaisa’s eye twinkled mischievously. “I’m not like these excitable Venlil, you can tell me.”
“If I were out looking for love, someone might say I was ‘on the prowl.’”
Mariah was relieved that her new friend squawked a laugh at the term.
“And are you?” Jaisa asked.
Mariah tilted her head. “Am I what?”
“Looking for a mate.”
Mariah raised her eyebrows. “I’m open to finding love. Are you?”
“Only with a good dancer,” Jaisa told her wickedly.
Mariah blinked. Jaisa had just complimented her dancing a moment ago. And she’d definitely been ruffling her feathers to change colors on the dance floor. They had been dancing very close — Mariah had assumed in an effort to discourage the other Krakotl from cutting in — was the bird hitting on her?
The human took a long sip of her algae bloom without breaking eye contact. “So that’s a yes, then.”
“Well, maybe.” Jaisa ruffled her feathers in false indignance at her directness, but Mariah noticed that she kept her brightest patches showing as she did. Mariah smirked and tossed her braids back over her shoulder. She hadn’t come here to get a date, but it was refreshing having an alien react positively to her on their first meeting, for once.
Jaisa preened herself in a manner that somehow screamed girl-next-door. “If you liked the algae bloom, human, you should try an aafazian. It’s not a Krakotl drink, but trust me, it’s delicious.”
“I’ll have to have one, then,” Mariah smiled. “If you ever come to our usual spot, you can try a human-style beer. Since you prefer drinks that aren’t too sweet, I think you’ll like it.”
“And your music, too.” Jaisa dropped her usual teasing tone to fix her eyes on the human in front of her. “I’m serious. I want to hear the music that made you who you are.”
Mariah’s heart jumped into her throat, and her cheeks warmed. Since she’d left her home planet, she had so often felt like an exhibit at a zoo, representing all of humanity to an alien audience. Now, Jaisa genuinely wanted to get to know her as an individual.
“Then I’ll show you.”
——————————————————————
A few hours later, the group walked out of the bar and onto the perpetually sunny street.
Amelia blinked at the sky. “Somehow, I’m always surprised when I walk out of a bar and it’s still bright outside, even though I should know this planet is tidally locked by now.”
“Me too!” Mariah cried. “We’ve been here hours, but it’s still mid-afternoon. It will be mid-afternoon both when we go to bed, and when we wake up in the morning! I don’t think I can get used to it.”
Glenil, Tarva, and Jaisa, who had grown up on the tidally-locked planet in question, chuckled at the alien absurdity of expecting change from something as constant as the sun.
“Well, it was so nice to see you, Jaisa,” Talva said, running her paw down her friend’s wing.
“You too, Talva. And it was nice to see you again, Glenil, and to meet you, Amelia.” Jaisa gave each of them a hug, somewhat startling Amelia, who had never had a beak shoved in her neck before.
“See you all later,” Mariah told them cheerfully. “Thanks for inviting me, Talva. I’m glad I came.”
Jaisa and Mariah walked away together. The other three turned towards Tarva and Amelia’s apartment.
“I just hope Mariah’s careful,” Amelia said. “I don’t think it’s ever a good idea to date someone on the rebound.”
“She’s a smart adult,” Talva pointed out. “She knows what she’s doing.”
“Jaisa has many faults, but using people really isn’t one of them,” added Glenil.
“I didn’t realize humans did same-sex courting, though,” Talva admitted. “It’s nice to see the biological imperative to reproduce isn’t what drives bonding for you.”
Amelia snorted. “I think her being female would be way less of a barrier than her being a bird!”
Glenil swatted her gently with his tail. “You’re in an interspecies relationship yourself! What was it your brother called you? A furry-lover?”
Amelia rolled her eyes. “It’s just ‘furry,’ and he’s ridiculous. At least we’re both mammals. I’m just saying, birds are really different! Like, they have beaks, and I don’t even know if… you know what, never mind.”
“Okay, so gossiping about your friend, that’s fine, but the mere thought of discussing anatomy makes you blush?” Talva’s tail wagged in amusement. “You humans have such funny ideas of propriety! I’ll confess, though, I’ve never been attracted to a Krakotl, myself. They’re a little loud and pushy for me to look at them that way.”
“Seemed like you were getting along with Krisim pretty well,” Glenil pointed out with a teasing ear flick.
“That’s different! He’s always flirting with anyone in sight, so I never talked to him much, but he’s actually really nice. He told me about a film festival I hadn’t heard about next month, so I think we’ll hang out again then.”
Amelia glanced at her sidelong, as if she were hoping that by not moving her head, her gaze might go unnoticed. “Are you sure that’s not a date?”
“Of course not! He knows I’m not interested, and he wasn’t doing any of the ridiculous posturing he usually does. No, definitely just friends. But I’m looking forward to talking to him more.”
Amelia nodded, smiling. “I’m glad we went. It was really good to just spend time with them, as regular people. I was nervous going into it, but, other than that one guy who yelled at us, it was nice. Kind of like the algae blooms, in a way. After you try it, it’s not so bad.”
“That’s probably what Mariah’s thinking,” Talva smirked.
“Ew, Talva, don’t go there!” Amelia squealed, as both Venlil laughed at her human prudishness.
Months ago, Talva was terrified of humans, but just didn’t think they deserved to be summarily exterminated. Yesterday, she’d been afraid to invite the humans to meet her Krakotl friend. Today, the humans had been nervous even entering a Krakotl establishment. But now, she didn’t think any one of them was afraid. That’s what the cultural exchange programs were all about, she supposed. Overcoming fear and prejudice, just by spending time with each other as people. With time, the monsters you feared could become the people who were your friends.
Maybe Jaisa was right when she said you have to be open to something to learn to appreciate it. Talva didn’t think she’d ever truly enjoy the signature Krakotl cocktail, but she was beginning to believe the old avian adage about it was true. It’s only once you drink it that the algae truly blooms.
First Previous
submitted by MackFenzie to HFY [link] [comments]
First Previous
At their secluded table, Amelia looked at Glenil. His dappled, ash-grey fur draped across his eyes, though he never seemed to mind it, and his sweetly tufted ears showed that he was focusing on her. Now that she had his attention, she felt silly for feeling so insecure earlier. But the bartender had been right - she had to let him know what had gone on in her head, or else they’d never be able to get on the same page.
“Glenil, I have something to confess.”
“Glenil?” he repeated, flicking his ears uneasily. “You used my actual name. I know humans only use their loved one’s official names when they’re angry. What’s wrong?”
Amelia raised her eyebrows and smiled. “Babe, I’m not angry. Well, I guess I am serious. I need to talk to you about some uncomfortable feelings I had, that’s all.” She took a deep breath before she went on. “Look, I didn’t realize you used to date Jaisa. I’m glad you’re still friends, I really am, but I wish you’d told me in advance so that I didn’t find out from some guy who’d only just stopped flirting with me when I told him you were my mate.”
Glenil’s ears twisted uncomfortably. “I didn’t realize that history was relevant. We’re friends now, I thought that would be all you would care to know.”
“Well, I feel differently. I do notice it doesn’t upset you at all to hear some other guy was just flirting with me and trying to buy me a drink,” she pointed out.
“Of course not. Why would I be? You told him you were in a monogamous relationship, and he backed off.”
“Well,” she sighed. “I would have been. Upset, I mean. And, I trust you. I trust you implicitly. But I did feel jealous watching you walk away with Jaisa, and even more so once I realized you used to date.”
As she spoke, Glenil's body tensed. His ears flattened, and his tail straightened out with her every word. “So, what, you’re jealous I had a life before I met you? Is that the real reason you didn’t want to invite me here? You don’t want me around other females because it might make you jealous?”
Amelia’s eyes widened and she leaned back in her chair. “No, that’s not it at all, I just—“
"Do you know why we broke up? Jaisa was jealous. She’d get drunk and dive-bomb any female friends who dared even talk to me. Jealous! ‘Jealous’ is just a predator-shit way of saying ‘aggressive and isolating.’”
Amelia stared at her hands, clasped tightly on the table. He had never yelled at her before. Glenil was usually such a thoughtful and caring communicator. Her heart thrummed tightly in her chest. She desperately wished she didn’t have alcohol in her system for this conversation. She hadn’t realized this would be such a touchy topic for him.
Half of her brain wanted to apologize for bringing it up, tell him to forget she even said anything, and the other half wanted to scream at him. He thought her feelings were predator-shit? Only Venlil are allowed to have irrational, emotional responses to things, is that right? But even after a couple drinks, she knew that would only escalate the situation further, so instead, she closed her eyes, took a breath, and counted to ten.
“I can see,” Amelia said quietly. “That this is something you have strong feelings about. I’m thinking that I shouldn’t have brought this up when we’d both been drinking. I’m sorry. Can we pause the conversation, and talk about it when we’re sober tomorrow?”
Glenil blinked at her. “You’re not going to tell me that jealousy is how you show love, and I’m just too much of a stupid, frightened Venlil to understand that?”
“No, of course not. Especially when you’ve made it clear it doesn’t make you feel loved.”
“Oh.” Glenil’s ears gradually relaxed, and he extended his tail to wrap around her wrist apologetically. “Shit. I’m sorry, Amelia. I thought you were saying… well, something you apparently weren’t saying. If you want to pause this conversation and talk tomorrow, we can, but if you want to finish it now, I promise I’ll listen.”
She frowned at him anxiously, but decided to speak her piece. “I’m just saying, I don’t know if it’s my cultural background or the territorial traits in my DNA that make me feel that jealousy, but I do know that it’s 100% my responsibility to handle my own emotions. I don’t want you to feel guilty for having history, or to change how you live your life, let alone turn you into a recluse, but I do need to be able to trust that you’ll give me the information I need to not get blindsided with this stuff in social settings.”
“You’re saying you wish that I’d told you about my history with Jaisa?”
Amelia nodded.
Glenil flicked his ears. “I suppose that’s a reasonable request. Jaisa and I did court, although it was only a few months. We just weren’t a good match, romantically. We were good friends, but she wanted someone a little more... territorial. I wanted someone who was less territorial and possessive. We just made better friends than lovers. So you don’t need to feel afraid that I’m going to decide to go back to her.”
Amelia frowned. “Babe, I’m not afraid. It's just that when you came in and I saw the way you hugged, I could feel that there was more between the two of you than I’d been told. That uncertainty felt scary, like catching a glimpse of movement in the shadows. Because you don’t know what’s there, you can’t tell if it’s a threat or not. I knew I was missing information, that I was in the dark about something. I couldn’t tell if you were intentionally hiding something from me, if she had always been in love with you from afar and she was going to try to compete with me, or if I was just overreacting over a cultural difference, over nothing. And then, I had to find out that backstory from a stranger.”
Glenil’s ears tilted in sympathy. “I can understand that. You weren’t sure if you should be on your guard, or calming your emotional responses, and so you weren’t able to fully do either one.”
Amelia nodded. “Exactly. And like I said, I trust you. I love you so much, and I trust you, completely, with my whole heart. I’m going to feel jealous sometimes, and I can, will, and do manage my own emotions. I’m definitely going to feel my feelings, but I can promise I won’t lash out at you over them. All I need is to know that you’ll also try to be more open with me in the future. I just don’t want to be the last one in the room to know.”
Glenil squeezed her wrist gently. “I can promise I will try, although I can’t promise I will always realize what information would be important to you. Can we talk tomorrow about what kind of things I should keep in mind to share going forward?”
Amelia smiled gratefully. “I’d like that. And thank you for listening, and taking me seriously.”
“I’m sorry I overreacted at first. And thank you for being so level and emotionally literate even after a few drinks. The lack of dive-bombing is deeply appreciated.”
Amelia laughed at him and gave him a quick kiss. “I try. You know we start learning how to handle our emotions as toddlers, right?”
“Yes, dear, you sang me all your ‘Big Feelings Nursery Rhymes’ last time you got too drunk,” he told her drily.
She giggled, and took his hand in hers. “And it was music to your ears, I’m sure.”
Glenil flicked his ears in a laugh. “You were really cute explaining the use of rhyme and meter in your language. Well, should we go find our friends again?”
Amelia swiveled her head to scan the room. “Oh, gosh. They’re dancing. I don’t even know how they can dance to this, I can’t even find a beat. Let’s just stay over here, at least until I finish this,” she said, lifting her drink to eye level. “Hey, babe. To communication.”
He waved his tail happily and lifted his own glass. “To communication.” He took a sip of his drink, and then flicked his ears at the dance floor. “By the way, if you were wondering what Jaisa flirting actually looks like, take a look at her feathers. She’s showing off all her iridescence.”
“Oh! Well that’s nothing like how she was acting with you. I can admit that’s a relief to learn,” Amelia quipped, grinning. “I hope Mariah realizes that’s what it means. She might be into it, though, she’s got her attention completely focused on her.”
“I can see her and Jaisa getting along,” he pondered. “They’re both confident enough to handle each other.”
“Over at the bar, it looks like Krisim might have found a new target, too.” At her boyfriend’s disgusted look, she rolled her eyes. “Target for his affections, I mean. Don’t look at me like that, that phrase isn’t even predatory! I don’t know if Talva’s even interested in dating right now, though. Want to go see if she needs to be rescued?”
——————————————————————
When the song came to an end, Mariah and Jaisa slowed their bodies and noticed for the first time just how close they were dancing without touching.
“Does human music sound anything like this?” Jaisa asked Mariah breathlessly
“Much of our popular dance music is simpler than what’s playing here. I’d bet the rhythms from the music of my father’s people is like nothing you’ve heard before.”
“The music of your father’s people… human tribes have different music?”
“Of course! I’m Nigerian, so I grew up listening to African music, which is different than what Amelia would be used to hearing in America. My father is a musician. Or, he was, before…” Mariah shook her head sharply. She’d just felt so good dancing, and she did not want to fall apart in this bar. “Anyway. He played traditional Igbo music, which is known for its complex polyrhythms. If I hadn’t been used to that, I don’t know if I could have figured out the rhythmic structure of your music.”
“I’m so sorry for your loss, Mariah. And I’d like to hear that music. Whatever taught you to dance like that must be incredible,” Jaisa said with a warm sincerity that Mariah hadn’t heard from her before.
She led the way to a nearby perch and gracefully hopped up to match Mariah’s height. They glanced around and noticed for the first time that Talva had not followed them onto the dance floor, but was drinking at the bar with Krisim.
“Oh, she’d better be careful,” Jaisa chuckled. “Krisim’s always been a xenophile, and I noticed him lekking earlier.”
“Lekking?”
“Looking for a mate. Shifting his feathers to show off his colors, dancing and singing to compete for attention. Most of these guys are. The attention can be nice, but sometimes being around a lek is just exhausting.”
“I see. Humans do the same thing, although we describe it differently. I agree, it can be exhausting,” Mariah said.
“Oh!” Jaisa said, ruffling her own colorful feathers. “How do you describe it? Does it sound exotic and predatory?”
Mariah paused, one corner of her mouth raised in a half-grin. “Do you want to know if it is?”
Jaisa’s eye twinkled mischievously. “I’m not like these excitable Venlil, you can tell me.”
“If I were out looking for love, someone might say I was ‘on the prowl.’”
Mariah was relieved that her new friend squawked a laugh at the term.
“And are you?” Jaisa asked.
Mariah tilted her head. “Am I what?”
“Looking for a mate.”
Mariah raised her eyebrows. “I’m open to finding love. Are you?”
“Only with a good dancer,” Jaisa told her wickedly.
Mariah blinked. Jaisa had just complimented her dancing a moment ago. And she’d definitely been ruffling her feathers to change colors on the dance floor. They had been dancing very close — Mariah had assumed in an effort to discourage the other Krakotl from cutting in — was the bird hitting on her?
The human took a long sip of her algae bloom without breaking eye contact. “So that’s a yes, then.”
“Well, maybe.” Jaisa ruffled her feathers in false indignance at her directness, but Mariah noticed that she kept her brightest patches showing as she did. Mariah smirked and tossed her braids back over her shoulder. She hadn’t come here to get a date, but it was refreshing having an alien react positively to her on their first meeting, for once.
Jaisa preened herself in a manner that somehow screamed girl-next-door. “If you liked the algae bloom, human, you should try an aafazian. It’s not a Krakotl drink, but trust me, it’s delicious.”
“I’ll have to have one, then,” Mariah smiled. “If you ever come to our usual spot, you can try a human-style beer. Since you prefer drinks that aren’t too sweet, I think you’ll like it.”
“And your music, too.” Jaisa dropped her usual teasing tone to fix her eyes on the human in front of her. “I’m serious. I want to hear the music that made you who you are.”
Mariah’s heart jumped into her throat, and her cheeks warmed. Since she’d left her home planet, she had so often felt like an exhibit at a zoo, representing all of humanity to an alien audience. Now, Jaisa genuinely wanted to get to know her as an individual.
“Then I’ll show you.”
——————————————————————
A few hours later, the group walked out of the bar and onto the perpetually sunny street.
Amelia blinked at the sky. “Somehow, I’m always surprised when I walk out of a bar and it’s still bright outside, even though I should know this planet is tidally locked by now.”
“Me too!” Mariah cried. “We’ve been here hours, but it’s still mid-afternoon. It will be mid-afternoon both when we go to bed, and when we wake up in the morning! I don’t think I can get used to it.”
Glenil, Tarva, and Jaisa, who had grown up on the tidally-locked planet in question, chuckled at the alien absurdity of expecting change from something as constant as the sun.
“Well, it was so nice to see you, Jaisa,” Talva said, running her paw down her friend’s wing.
“You too, Talva. And it was nice to see you again, Glenil, and to meet you, Amelia.” Jaisa gave each of them a hug, somewhat startling Amelia, who had never had a beak shoved in her neck before.
“See you all later,” Mariah told them cheerfully. “Thanks for inviting me, Talva. I’m glad I came.”
Jaisa and Mariah walked away together. The other three turned towards Tarva and Amelia’s apartment.
“I just hope Mariah’s careful,” Amelia said. “I don’t think it’s ever a good idea to date someone on the rebound.”
“She’s a smart adult,” Talva pointed out. “She knows what she’s doing.”
“Jaisa has many faults, but using people really isn’t one of them,” added Glenil.
“I didn’t realize humans did same-sex courting, though,” Talva admitted. “It’s nice to see the biological imperative to reproduce isn’t what drives bonding for you.”
Amelia snorted. “I think her being female would be way less of a barrier than her being a bird!”
Glenil swatted her gently with his tail. “You’re in an interspecies relationship yourself! What was it your brother called you? A furry-lover?”
Amelia rolled her eyes. “It’s just ‘furry,’ and he’s ridiculous. At least we’re both mammals. I’m just saying, birds are really different! Like, they have beaks, and I don’t even know if… you know what, never mind.”
“Okay, so gossiping about your friend, that’s fine, but the mere thought of discussing anatomy makes you blush?” Talva’s tail wagged in amusement. “You humans have such funny ideas of propriety! I’ll confess, though, I’ve never been attracted to a Krakotl, myself. They’re a little loud and pushy for me to look at them that way.”
“Seemed like you were getting along with Krisim pretty well,” Glenil pointed out with a teasing ear flick.
“That’s different! He’s always flirting with anyone in sight, so I never talked to him much, but he’s actually really nice. He told me about a film festival I hadn’t heard about next month, so I think we’ll hang out again then.”
Amelia glanced at her sidelong, as if she were hoping that by not moving her head, her gaze might go unnoticed. “Are you sure that’s not a date?”
“Of course not! He knows I’m not interested, and he wasn’t doing any of the ridiculous posturing he usually does. No, definitely just friends. But I’m looking forward to talking to him more.”
Amelia nodded, smiling. “I’m glad we went. It was really good to just spend time with them, as regular people. I was nervous going into it, but, other than that one guy who yelled at us, it was nice. Kind of like the algae blooms, in a way. After you try it, it’s not so bad.”
“That’s probably what Mariah’s thinking,” Talva smirked.
“Ew, Talva, don’t go there!” Amelia squealed, as both Venlil laughed at her human prudishness.
Months ago, Talva was terrified of humans, but just didn’t think they deserved to be summarily exterminated. Yesterday, she’d been afraid to invite the humans to meet her Krakotl friend. Today, the humans had been nervous even entering a Krakotl establishment. But now, she didn’t think any one of them was afraid. That’s what the cultural exchange programs were all about, she supposed. Overcoming fear and prejudice, just by spending time with each other as people. With time, the monsters you feared could become the people who were your friends.
Maybe Jaisa was right when she said you have to be open to something to learn to appreciate it. Talva didn’t think she’d ever truly enjoy the signature Krakotl cocktail, but she was beginning to believe the old avian adage about it was true. It’s only once you drink it that the algae truly blooms.
First Previous
2023.03.24 13:58 ToothSuccessful9654 ZT1: Thirsty guests!
Ok so I'm building a new zoo, and I've got restaurants, vending machines and drink stands absolutely everywhere! How can I stop the guests being thirsty? I know a lot of the modded restaurants don't serve drinks, even though it says they do, but I've tried to make up for that with drink stands, restaurants that are original that DO serve drinks and vending machines on literally every corner of the exhibits. Yet still the people are thirsty! I've never had thirsty guests before.
submitted by ToothSuccessful9654 to ZooTycoon [link] [comments]
2023.03.24 13:06 BitchBaddest Image of the day: Gwyneth Paltrow goes viral for courtroom appearance in ski accident case.
 | submitted by BitchBaddest to SoYouKnow [link] [comments] |
2023.03.24 12:23 andyhopp Vendor booths at Oddmall: Inside Out in Canton close to selling out. www.Oddmall.info
 | submitted by andyhopp to AkronOH [link] [comments] |
2023.03.24 12:22 andyhopp Vendor Booths for Oddmall: Inside Out at Stark County Fairgrounds close to selling out. www.Oddmall.info
 | submitted by andyhopp to canton [link] [comments] |
2023.03.24 09:31 Far_Emergency_262 I'm struggling to find a job in my field, and am now desperate to find any employment because I am on the verge of losing everything. Need advice on what to do next.
I haven't posted in probably over a decade, and haven't been a regular reader in years, but I come because I need help in the form of real actionable advice. I have exhausted my "irl" resources (the few I have), and I don't know where else to go.
The Problem I'm having a very hard time finding a job in my field (computer programming). I've been unemployed for nearly a year and my savings have completely dried up. I'm at the point now where I must have some form of income or I will be unable to pay any bill (let alone have food) after this month.
I need to get a job - any job - and besides the obvious act of filling out applications, I'm not sure how to go about it. I'm afraid that Bigbox Store manager is going to see 15+ years of programming experience in my job history and (rightly) assume that I will jump ship as soon as I can get back in the field. I don't know what I could say to a hiring manager to convince them that wouldn't happen - I'm a terrible liar.
At the end of the day, the longer I'm away from being a professional coder, the harder it will be to find a job as one, something that is already becoming a stumbling block. If I see an opportunity - ANY opportunity - I have to take it.
If I do manage to find a temp job(s), depending on the pay, I will likely have to work a lot of hours in order to get by, leaving little time to continue looking for programming jobs, working on my skills, and learning new technologies. I'm worried I'll become "stuck".
Please don't mistake my reticence to be driven by pride or shame; I will literally do any job in my capability and strongly believe that I am not "above" any work or worker. I'd be happy doing anything that could afford my relatively modest lifestyle, but I'm afraid that isn't sustainable for my family. Working as a software developer typically comes with a much higher salary and nicer benefits than an "unskilled" job. My partner has a disability preventing them from finding regular employment, and their quality of life would greatly benefit from premium medical care and having things that the extra cash can afford (more therapy, accommodations for the home, not having to work the few free hours in the week they have left after doctor and hospital visits). In short, I need to make cheddar so my partner can have a healthier and longer life and coding is the only skill I have that can "maximize my earning potential".
There are several issues, internal and external, contributing to my circumstances that should be included for context. I also think I need to vent a little...
Why I'm Unemployed I was fired from my last position.
When I first joined the company, I hit the ground running as a top performer. Within a year, I had made a significant impact at the company and was recognized for it by top brass. I enjoyed going to the office and was proud of the work I did. I continued to have glowing performance reviews until some changes in the office environment adversely affected my ability to consistently produce good work.
About a year and a half into my tenure, due to headcount growth in the IT department, the company hired a new CIO (IT was previously under the CFO). Almost immediately, the office and the org chart came under construction. For the next two years, we lived as office vagabonds, wheeling around our new portable sit-to-stand desks in a completely gutted floor looking for space and working power outlets. The IT department was literally working at construction site, replete with piles of demolition garbage and materials littering the bare concrete floor, searing blasts of power saws biting into metal, and the oppressive wash of non-diffused fluorescent light. It wasn't until several people complained directly to the CIO did management consider allowing some of us to work from home. I jumped at the opportunity because i was just not getting work done in the office. For a few months, my productivity picked back up.
The construction finally concluded and we were all made to return to the office. Our reward for enduring two years of working out of our laptop bags and paper ream boxes? An open office space just big enough to cram the entire teams' shitty little portable desks into. One wall was taken up by a giant window to the interior, facing a large common area and the main elevators. It felt like we were turned into the "Code Monkey Exhibit" at the office zoo. AND, due to a failure in floor plan design, our cramped room turned into a major thoroughfare to the new and constantly booked conference room! No effort was made toward sound dampening despite promises there would be. We had no control over lighting which management insisted remain at 100% despite many (including myself) preferring lower light for headaches/eyestrain/concentration reasons.
Between the noise, lights, and regular parade of meeting goers loudly milling about just two feet behind me, I got next to nothing done. Performance and reviews plummeted throughout the department. All signs pointed to the new office situation, but management chose to remain blind to personnel complaints. Six months of this, then the pandemic hit.
During the initial lockdown and throughout the year, the company employed a robust policy concerning the virus and work flexibility. In the meantime, despite the world falling apart, I felt I had bounced back. Then in late 2021 I was moved under a new supervisor on a new project. Then my mother nearly died of covid. I took time under FMLA to help care for her as she was nearly helpless during recovery. I returned from leave in early 2022 to find a radical shift in management's attitude toward working from home. There was no more covid policy, no mask or vaccine mandate, and everyone was to return to the office. This was alarming; not only was I still spending most evenings with my mom, but my partner's chronic health issues leave them at high risk too, not to mention the abject chaos in the office itself that renders me unproductive. I tried explaining this to my new supervisor, the IT manager, and the CIO. I was dismissed with "it'll be taken under consideration, now back to work at your desk here in the office".
So I did. I continued wearing a mask in the office even though most people chose not to. Because there was no vaccine policy, I had to ask everyone personally if they were vaccinated and embarrassingly explain why I felt compelled to invade their privacy, Turns out most people were and understood my concern. My new supervisor on the other hand was not and responded to my inquiry with some fantasy conspiracy nonsense that I swear included references to the movie12 Monkeys. I just kept my mouth shut and mask on. The fucker sat right next to me.
First quarter reviews come around and I am absolutely raked over the coals by my supervisor. Some of criticism was fair, I did rather poorly that quarter. Some of it wasn't, I literally wasn't there for the first three weeks, and was assigned to a brand new project. I had asked for any accommodation that would help improve my productivity and received none. Finally I asked to be put on a performance plan. My supervisor said he'd develop one for me.
That night, on the drive home from my mom's house, I was hit by a speeding semi. Technically twice - the first was a clip to my rear that sent me spinning, the second was a full-on t-bone to the driver's side. The cops and paramedics say I'm pretty lucky to have sustained only minor injuries. The second hit was so hard that part of my rear door was bent around the truck's bumper, preventing my car from flipping.
The next day, I call in to explain the situation and take a couple of days off. Because of being dicked around by the trucker's insurance company on a rental, I'm not able to physically return to the office for another week, so in the meantime I work from home and start to feel like I'm doing better.
Less than a week back in the office, however, and I can see how the office environment directly impedes my work. Again I talk to my supervisor and the IT manager, literally begging for any accommodation. I'm told that I am not permitted to work from home because I'm on a performance plan, and despite several empty cubicles throughout the building, that there was no available space elsewhere in the office. I asked about the status of my performance plan...he's working on it.
That next Friday I am called into the IT managers office and fired citing under-performance and insubordination by willfully ignoring my supervisor's performance plan (that I never received). Any attempts to speak in my defense were quickly dismissed as the manager just continued talking over me. Eventually I gave up and shut down, saving all my mental energy to fight off breaking down into tears or succumbing to the panic I felt emerging in my gut. I was escorted from the building and that was that.
Two weeks later, my dog passed away. I spiraled hard for a few months, having neither the energy or desire to do anything more ambitious than laying on the couch, watching the series Wilfred for the n-teeth time while softly crying into my pillow. With support from my partner and strategies built from years of my life spent in treatment for ADHD, severe depression, and anxiety, I began to right the ship.
Then my cat passed away. I felt like I was starting to crack. With little choice, I used a huge chunk of my savings to get back to regular therapy. By October last year, I finally felt ready to get back to work.
I was pretty optimistic at first. My resume was getting a lot of hits on the various job sites and my inbox and voicemail were filling up with messages from recruiters. Even as the rejections began to mount, there were so many jobs available I was bound to be hired soon. So I thought.
I'm Bombing Interviews Probably my biggest obstacle in finding a job is not interviewing well. As mentioned before, I have long struggled with severe anxiety. Regular therapy and Rx have done wonders for my quality of life, but there are some situations that always put me on the edge of panic. Job interviews are chief among them. Over the years, I have developed strategies to keep my brain in check, but even if I'm able to stave off a panic attack and manage to get through the interview, it is impossible to mask the physiological evidence of my anxiety.
I sweat...a lot. I have primary generalized hyperhydrosis and as with many who deal with the condition, it is exacerbated in times of high anxiety. While the Rx I take has made a significant dent in my usual daily over-sweating, it does little to help during the anxiety-provoking stress of a job interview. This isn't just a moist brow and clammy hands. It is full-body, clothes-soaking, dripping sweat, as if I were roofing with hot tar in the blazing sun. It is uncontrollable and impossible to hide.
Next, at my most anxious, I am wracked with tremors. Parts of my body, particularly my hands, shake uncontrollably. My voice trembles making me sound timid and weak, no matter how much bass or confidence I try to put behind it.
I have been on 8 interviews so far (out of 70+ applications and recruiter leads). Two were cut short as I reached full panic and had to excuse myself (neither client wanted to reschedule). Three were outright failures as my brain "froze" and I floundered on technical questions. One of them I felt went really well, but then I froze up later, totally blowing their coding challenge. Two went okay, but I can't help but think that, in a large field of candidates, the one shaking and dripping sweat onto the conference room table might get moved to the end of the list.
I probably leave many interviewers thinking "This poor, terrified goblin can barely form a coherent sentence and it thinks it can code? How quaint. I would keep it around for amusement were it not so disgusting and pathetic."
I can get pretty dark when it comes to self-reflection. It oddly helps me cope.
I need to begin looking for any job that will hire me just so I don't lose everything, but I don't have a strategy for finding that job, or how I get back to a coding job if I do.
submitted by Far_Emergency_262 to jobs [link] [comments]
The Problem I'm having a very hard time finding a job in my field (computer programming). I've been unemployed for nearly a year and my savings have completely dried up. I'm at the point now where I must have some form of income or I will be unable to pay any bill (let alone have food) after this month.
I need to get a job - any job - and besides the obvious act of filling out applications, I'm not sure how to go about it. I'm afraid that Bigbox Store manager is going to see 15+ years of programming experience in my job history and (rightly) assume that I will jump ship as soon as I can get back in the field. I don't know what I could say to a hiring manager to convince them that wouldn't happen - I'm a terrible liar.
At the end of the day, the longer I'm away from being a professional coder, the harder it will be to find a job as one, something that is already becoming a stumbling block. If I see an opportunity - ANY opportunity - I have to take it.
If I do manage to find a temp job(s), depending on the pay, I will likely have to work a lot of hours in order to get by, leaving little time to continue looking for programming jobs, working on my skills, and learning new technologies. I'm worried I'll become "stuck".
Please don't mistake my reticence to be driven by pride or shame; I will literally do any job in my capability and strongly believe that I am not "above" any work or worker. I'd be happy doing anything that could afford my relatively modest lifestyle, but I'm afraid that isn't sustainable for my family. Working as a software developer typically comes with a much higher salary and nicer benefits than an "unskilled" job. My partner has a disability preventing them from finding regular employment, and their quality of life would greatly benefit from premium medical care and having things that the extra cash can afford (more therapy, accommodations for the home, not having to work the few free hours in the week they have left after doctor and hospital visits). In short, I need to make cheddar so my partner can have a healthier and longer life and coding is the only skill I have that can "maximize my earning potential".
There are several issues, internal and external, contributing to my circumstances that should be included for context. I also think I need to vent a little...
Why I'm Unemployed I was fired from my last position.
When I first joined the company, I hit the ground running as a top performer. Within a year, I had made a significant impact at the company and was recognized for it by top brass. I enjoyed going to the office and was proud of the work I did. I continued to have glowing performance reviews until some changes in the office environment adversely affected my ability to consistently produce good work.
About a year and a half into my tenure, due to headcount growth in the IT department, the company hired a new CIO (IT was previously under the CFO). Almost immediately, the office and the org chart came under construction. For the next two years, we lived as office vagabonds, wheeling around our new portable sit-to-stand desks in a completely gutted floor looking for space and working power outlets. The IT department was literally working at construction site, replete with piles of demolition garbage and materials littering the bare concrete floor, searing blasts of power saws biting into metal, and the oppressive wash of non-diffused fluorescent light. It wasn't until several people complained directly to the CIO did management consider allowing some of us to work from home. I jumped at the opportunity because i was just not getting work done in the office. For a few months, my productivity picked back up.
The construction finally concluded and we were all made to return to the office. Our reward for enduring two years of working out of our laptop bags and paper ream boxes? An open office space just big enough to cram the entire teams' shitty little portable desks into. One wall was taken up by a giant window to the interior, facing a large common area and the main elevators. It felt like we were turned into the "Code Monkey Exhibit" at the office zoo. AND, due to a failure in floor plan design, our cramped room turned into a major thoroughfare to the new and constantly booked conference room! No effort was made toward sound dampening despite promises there would be. We had no control over lighting which management insisted remain at 100% despite many (including myself) preferring lower light for headaches/eyestrain/concentration reasons.
Between the noise, lights, and regular parade of meeting goers loudly milling about just two feet behind me, I got next to nothing done. Performance and reviews plummeted throughout the department. All signs pointed to the new office situation, but management chose to remain blind to personnel complaints. Six months of this, then the pandemic hit.
During the initial lockdown and throughout the year, the company employed a robust policy concerning the virus and work flexibility. In the meantime, despite the world falling apart, I felt I had bounced back. Then in late 2021 I was moved under a new supervisor on a new project. Then my mother nearly died of covid. I took time under FMLA to help care for her as she was nearly helpless during recovery. I returned from leave in early 2022 to find a radical shift in management's attitude toward working from home. There was no more covid policy, no mask or vaccine mandate, and everyone was to return to the office. This was alarming; not only was I still spending most evenings with my mom, but my partner's chronic health issues leave them at high risk too, not to mention the abject chaos in the office itself that renders me unproductive. I tried explaining this to my new supervisor, the IT manager, and the CIO. I was dismissed with "it'll be taken under consideration, now back to work at your desk here in the office".
So I did. I continued wearing a mask in the office even though most people chose not to. Because there was no vaccine policy, I had to ask everyone personally if they were vaccinated and embarrassingly explain why I felt compelled to invade their privacy, Turns out most people were and understood my concern. My new supervisor on the other hand was not and responded to my inquiry with some fantasy conspiracy nonsense that I swear included references to the movie12 Monkeys. I just kept my mouth shut and mask on. The fucker sat right next to me.
First quarter reviews come around and I am absolutely raked over the coals by my supervisor. Some of criticism was fair, I did rather poorly that quarter. Some of it wasn't, I literally wasn't there for the first three weeks, and was assigned to a brand new project. I had asked for any accommodation that would help improve my productivity and received none. Finally I asked to be put on a performance plan. My supervisor said he'd develop one for me.
That night, on the drive home from my mom's house, I was hit by a speeding semi. Technically twice - the first was a clip to my rear that sent me spinning, the second was a full-on t-bone to the driver's side. The cops and paramedics say I'm pretty lucky to have sustained only minor injuries. The second hit was so hard that part of my rear door was bent around the truck's bumper, preventing my car from flipping.
The next day, I call in to explain the situation and take a couple of days off. Because of being dicked around by the trucker's insurance company on a rental, I'm not able to physically return to the office for another week, so in the meantime I work from home and start to feel like I'm doing better.
Less than a week back in the office, however, and I can see how the office environment directly impedes my work. Again I talk to my supervisor and the IT manager, literally begging for any accommodation. I'm told that I am not permitted to work from home because I'm on a performance plan, and despite several empty cubicles throughout the building, that there was no available space elsewhere in the office. I asked about the status of my performance plan...he's working on it.
That next Friday I am called into the IT managers office and fired citing under-performance and insubordination by willfully ignoring my supervisor's performance plan (that I never received). Any attempts to speak in my defense were quickly dismissed as the manager just continued talking over me. Eventually I gave up and shut down, saving all my mental energy to fight off breaking down into tears or succumbing to the panic I felt emerging in my gut. I was escorted from the building and that was that.
Two weeks later, my dog passed away. I spiraled hard for a few months, having neither the energy or desire to do anything more ambitious than laying on the couch, watching the series Wilfred for the n-teeth time while softly crying into my pillow. With support from my partner and strategies built from years of my life spent in treatment for ADHD, severe depression, and anxiety, I began to right the ship.
Then my cat passed away. I felt like I was starting to crack. With little choice, I used a huge chunk of my savings to get back to regular therapy. By October last year, I finally felt ready to get back to work.
I was pretty optimistic at first. My resume was getting a lot of hits on the various job sites and my inbox and voicemail were filling up with messages from recruiters. Even as the rejections began to mount, there were so many jobs available I was bound to be hired soon. So I thought.
I'm Bombing Interviews Probably my biggest obstacle in finding a job is not interviewing well. As mentioned before, I have long struggled with severe anxiety. Regular therapy and Rx have done wonders for my quality of life, but there are some situations that always put me on the edge of panic. Job interviews are chief among them. Over the years, I have developed strategies to keep my brain in check, but even if I'm able to stave off a panic attack and manage to get through the interview, it is impossible to mask the physiological evidence of my anxiety.
I sweat...a lot. I have primary generalized hyperhydrosis and as with many who deal with the condition, it is exacerbated in times of high anxiety. While the Rx I take has made a significant dent in my usual daily over-sweating, it does little to help during the anxiety-provoking stress of a job interview. This isn't just a moist brow and clammy hands. It is full-body, clothes-soaking, dripping sweat, as if I were roofing with hot tar in the blazing sun. It is uncontrollable and impossible to hide.
Next, at my most anxious, I am wracked with tremors. Parts of my body, particularly my hands, shake uncontrollably. My voice trembles making me sound timid and weak, no matter how much bass or confidence I try to put behind it.
I have been on 8 interviews so far (out of 70+ applications and recruiter leads). Two were cut short as I reached full panic and had to excuse myself (neither client wanted to reschedule). Three were outright failures as my brain "froze" and I floundered on technical questions. One of them I felt went really well, but then I froze up later, totally blowing their coding challenge. Two went okay, but I can't help but think that, in a large field of candidates, the one shaking and dripping sweat onto the conference room table might get moved to the end of the list.
I probably leave many interviewers thinking "This poor, terrified goblin can barely form a coherent sentence and it thinks it can code? How quaint. I would keep it around for amusement were it not so disgusting and pathetic."
I can get pretty dark when it comes to self-reflection. It oddly helps me cope.
Important note, if you have actually read this far, thanks! Even if you don't have advice, you are probably a person with sympathy for the plight of the human condition and I find that worthy of respect. However, if what you read so far has inspired you to reply with advice on how to "cure" the the physiological side-effects of my anxiety, or "one great trick" to pass the interview...please don't. It is something that exists that I just have to cope with, and I have medical professionals helping with that. I'm only including this information because its related to my current situation. I am not seeking health advice, I'm seeking career advice.That brings us to today. I'm still frantically scrambling to find any job in my field, spending any spare time running though coding drills and studying interview questions (preparation helps with recall during interviews when I'm spending most of my mental energy trying not to panic), but I have to face the very likely reality I won't be able to secure said job by the time I have nothing left.
I need to begin looking for any job that will hire me just so I don't lose everything, but I don't have a strategy for finding that job, or how I get back to a coding job if I do.
2023.03.24 05:04 yalchyy Planet Zoo Okapi Exhibit (Speed Build)
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2023.03.24 02:46 MusaMusix But the wife's been dead
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2023.03.24 00:38 pard_x First restaurant attempt. Built into the side of a mountain
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