Hey I want this questions answer to be in-depth and not short. Currently I'm silver 1 and i want to rank up but I want to learn all mechanics and become a good and very consistent player. If someone has any guides of youtube to make a playlist or can explain me in here.But i wanna guide on movement how to master. Aim ,positioning, crosshair placement, mentality and how to improve gamesense. I really need this pls help

I think it's on Lodestar Island. It's the same Poneglyph that was moved from Fishman Island.
The Former Rocks Pirates and Roger are aware of the significance of the Red Poneglyphs, but by whom or how did they find out? Let's start with the Rocks Pirates they started at Pirate Island and wanted the world's riches, this attracted powerful members with 3 of them later becoming Yonko. They get the answer of how to get to Laughtale…but don’t care(at this point it's a location that promises nothing of value to the crew), they then pillage and murder their way to God Valley(presuming Marijoa comes later), where they meet their end against Garp and Roger. Roger doesn't learn second hand from the Rocks Crew at God Valley he finds out on his own presumably. Roger finds out about the existence of the last island because the log pose goes crazy once he reaches the final Island of Lodestar, he also finds out about the significance of Poneglyphs, in particular the red colored ones. But how? Does a person tell him or is it written down? I think there is a story that we haven’t heard yet that they have, something vague like to reach the final island, you have to seek out 4 large red stones inscribed with text to find it.
Roger then goes around the world, encountering several poneglyphs and taking rubbings to be deciphered later on, Roger was aware of the need of an interpreter for them and just finding the 4 road poneglyphs wasn’t enough. He recruits Oden who can read them and later finds Laughtale. Now Luffy has Robin to read the Poneglyphs and Big Mom had Charlotte Pudding who later on could awaken the ability to read to poneglyphs, now Blackbeard has her. But Big Mom had to have a child with a 3rd-eye tribe member, so where is he or the other tribe members? If they’ve been Lulusia’d then one of the last surviving members had a child and later died. Blackbeard needed Charlotte Pudding specifically because she may be the last known member of her tribe alive similar to King.
Roger tells everyone about the One Piece at his execution and says it's anyones for the taking if they can find it. There is now more significance placed onto Red Poneglyphs, because they take you to the grand treasure left by the Pirate King as well as what the Ancient Kingdom left. I feel as soon as Roger and Whitebeard had their final meeting, Whitebeard moves the Fishman Island Road Poneglyph knowing many will come for it and the strength to stop strong pirates isn’t there. Big Mom had one in her possession, it's unknown where she got it from, she has it before/during Rogers final voyage and he gets it then by sneaking a rubbing from it, Big Mom likely took it from wherever as a trophy or status symbol even if she was unable to decipher it.
After Wano, Shanks and Blackbeard are aware Kidd and Law have Road Poneglyph rubbings and demand them once they meet. Now Blackbeard was on Whitebeard's Crew and Shanks was on Rogers, so they learned the importance of them then. Assuming Blackbeard gets the Zou(Law was there unsure if he got it offscreen)and Wano Rubbings from Law, and we saw Shanks gets the Wano and Whole Cake Island(Killer confirms they get this in chapter 1056) rubbing from Kidd. Also a member of Kidd's crew hands over a stack of rubbings calling it our Road Poneglyph(S).
This puts Blackbeard at 2 Road Poneglyphs, missing the Whole Cake Island one and the other one, unless Shiryu took the Whole Cake one without anyone noticing or a similar deal to how Kidd pirates got theirs. So potentially 3 we know of, if he already had the other one from his days on Whitebeard's crew, then he’s at 4 and heading to Laughtale ZEHAHAHA.
This puts Shanks at 2 Road Poneglyphs from Kidd. Missing the Zou Road poneglyph and the other one.
Currently the Straw Hats have 3 from Zou, Whole Cake Island and Wano. The other one is missing and its whereabouts are currently unknown.
Cross Guild formed only very recently, if Captain John's treasure includes the Road Poneglyph then that will bring them into this. But currently Cross Guild doesn’t have any and are unlikely to get any because the only copies are among the other Yonko right now.
Kidd appeared at Elbaf and Shanks was there too with his Fleet; it may make sense for it to be at Elbaf. But there’s no known connection between Whitebeard and the Giants for him to entrust the Road Poneglyph to them, Whitebeard and Shanks talked before Marineford so he may have disclosed its location to Shanks and Shanks either knows or has moved it. But Shank’s fleet is considered widely weak so maybe he hides a great treasure among his territories, but that's hard to believe. He could have it on the Red Force his Flagship so it's always safe/with him. Blackbeard may know where it is since he was on Whitebeard's crew, but the period after he kills Thatch he loses contact, so if it was moved after that time he wouldn’t know where it is. They aren’t allied with the World Government too and one of the strongest forces in the world so can defend it from outsiders.
If Blackbeard had it, it would have been mentioned when Inuarashi says 2 Road Poneglyphs belong to Big Mom and Kaido, also Marco would know where it is right now he was closest to Whitebeard. The Navy and Weevil went to Sphinx island looking for Whitebeard's treasure and there is no mention of a Road poneglyph from Marco then. If the Payback war took place at the Road Poneglyph location and he obtained it then, Marco should have said something to Shanks or Luffy that he has it, but that didn’t happen. Also there is a point above in this post that mentions he potentially has 4 if everything assumption is right.
The first time we have seen each Road Poneglyph in the current day is when a member of the Straw Hat is near. Zou was by the crew minus Sanji and Jimbei, Whole Cake was by Brook (unsure if it was shown before he got to it) and Wano was by Robin. So in all cases it's the Road Poneglyph itself, they won’t get a rubbing they will see the real deal.
So why Lodestar? It fits some criteria I think are important.
1- It's currently unknown if it's a Yonko territory of either Shanks or Blackbeard. This is the most important point because it can’t be a race to Laughtale between Yonko unless there's one they will all converge on.
2- It's somewhere where Roger has been before.
3- Supporting point for 1 is that it's the last island that the log pose will take you to if you follow it all the way, meaning it's not just a converging point for Yonko but anyone who follows the log pose also means the Marines, Revolutionary Army, Cross Guild and everyone else can reach it. I don’t think the final war will take place at Lodestar, but it has some things going for it. Also its similar to how the worst generation all end up at Sabaody Archipelago.
4- Last Island of the Grandline so it puts them closer to it potentially.
5- Only the strongest pirates and crews can get through the whole grand line,considering you have to go through either Yonko territory or a Marine affiliated country, it's a great filter and very unlikely you ever get there. We only know the Roger Pirates reached it and then Laughtale.
The counterpoints I will add are:
1- Would Whitebeard place such an important object on an island most people won't reach completely unguarded or unaffiliated without a world power of some sort?
2- How will the race start? Probably the most confusing part will be how everyone finds out it's there and will converge to get it. Someone with a mind like Doflamingo/Blackbeard could have Morgans spread it in the paper and put the whole world into chaos. However it's done it will have to involve Morgans and his newspaper to spread it to every world power, I doubt a den-den mushi signal would be picked up by everyone to then race there.
TL;DR - It was moved to Lodestar by Whitebeard because the strong pirates found out about their significance from either former Rocks/Roger crew members and the connection to Laugh Tale. Because only Yonko level crew can truly reach it and it's unaffiliated to anyone so it's ripe for the taking by anyone.

Hello guys, I saw a question in the ets official guide that I am having problems understanding.
A reading list for a humanities course consists of 10 books, of which 4 are biographies and the rest are novels. Each student is required to read a selection of 4 books from the list, including 2 or more biographies. How many selections of 4 books satisfy the requirements?
A 90
B 115
C 130
D 144
E 195
​
​
Why isn't the answer 672?
My method : no of ways of choosing 1 biography from 4 biographies* no of ways of choosing 1 biography from 3 biographies* no of ways of choosing 1 book from remaining 8 books * no of ways of choosing 1 book from remaining 7 books
= 4*3*8*7
=672
​
I know my logic is wrong but i can't seem to find the flaw

Hello, I'm a 26 boy, tall 1,80 with slim body and I'd like to find a girl to speak a bit and see how it ends... I'm from Italy but I would prefer to keep it something online at the moment but if we are close and we get along we could also consider to meet in the future.
A little bit about me: I'm shy and a bit unconfident, I graduated but I'm considering to continue studying as finding a job seems really hard nowdays. I like playing chess but also some shitty games on pc, going to the sea when I have the chance and hang out and drink with friends.
About the "kinky" part I'm more on the submissive side but I can try to switch sometimes if you like that. I'm a big fan of joi and being controlled in general and I'm open to try new things as I'm pretty new to this, I had very few and shorts experiences online but I liked it a lot so far.
I would prefer moving on discord or skype so feel free to text me if you may be interested :)
(please answer to this only if you are a real girl)

Hello, I'm a 26 boy, tall 1,80 with slim body and I'd like to find a girl to speak a bit and see how it ends... I'm from Italy but I would prefer to keep it something online at the moment but if we are close and we get along we could also consider to meet in the future.
A little bit about me: I'm shy and a bit unconfident, I graduated but I'm considering to continue studying as finding a job seems really hard nowdays. I like playing chess but also some shitty games on pc, going to the sea when I have the chance and hang out and drink with friends.
About the "kinky" part I'm more on the submissive side but I can try to switch sometimes if you like that. I'm a big fan of joi and being controlled in general and I'm open to try new things as I'm pretty new to this, I had very few and shorts experiences online but I liked it a lot so far.
I would prefer moving on discord or skype so feel free to text me if you may be interested :)
(please answer to this only if you are a real girl)

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I am a student who's about to complete his grade 12th. Like many other students I also had dreams of going to the top Elite colleges in the usa and I worked so damn hard for it. I studied by myself without a tutor or anything and got 1540 in my sat on the first attempt. Even though I'm an international student I gave three aps - physics 1 physics 2 and calculus AB and got a 3, 3, and 4 respectively. Not brilliant marks by any means, but considering that I studied by myself while also studying my regular school courses, I was satisfied. I wrote a book on astrophysics for 8-12 year olds (astrophysics was my intended major). Every day after school I'd come home to work on the book and I'd stay awake at nights sometimes for the same as well. I even wrote two research papers and had an internship at an astronomical observatory that housed my countries biggest astronomical telescope and even got a glowing recommendation from a senior scientist there. I worked hard to maintain my grades and was always near the top of my batch. And all this despite having adhd, which meant that I had to work twice as hard as others to see the same results. I didn't come from an obnoxiously rich family and couldn't afford summer schools or anything like that, and relied on financial aid for college.
And still, even after all this work, I got rejected from all the reach colleges i applied to. Harvard, Princeton, Yale, uchicago, John Hopkins, Stanford- all of them. Right now I'm going to attend penn state.
I'm at an extremely low point of my life. For four years I denied myself any kind of happiness because I told myself that it'd all be worth it in the end. But that's the thing, it wasn't. I failed. After all the hours I put in, I failed. My friends laughed at me when I told them id go to an ivy and I swore that I'd prove them wrong, but I proved them right instead.
I feel hollow, and I feel cheated, cause many of my peers who didn't put in as much work as I did DID get in into ivies.
I don't know if it's even worth trying anymore, because I don't know if anything I ever do will get me results.
I delayed gratification for four years to get it after school ended, but I guess I'm not going to be getting that. I want answers, why me? Why am I getting life's worst trials and tribulations while my peers get so many boundless joys? What did I do? Why am I not entitled to feeling happy and fulfilled?
But no one has these answers, and at this point I'm not sure if I ever will. I have lost my motivation. I've lost that fire under my belly.
I wrote this post just to unburden cause I'm feeling extremely lost and hollow.

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I've been in my job for 2 years. I don't want to say too much because my boss and people at work are assholes and I've gotten in trouble before for expressing my discontent.
It's a pretty white collar corporate job. I got it fresh out of college and by all means was underprepared. It's an "entry level" that's not really entry level, but I never had a senior in the job to teach or guide me. It's basically been me teaching myself. I had 1 guy briefly who was terrible and didn't teach anything, barely replied to emails, never answered a question straight forward. If anything he confused me more. He got fired real fast.
After 2 years I have decent experience to pivot somewhere else. I have a lot of issues with my job, complain constantly and hate it. I'd quit but I have a huge fear It's one of those "tge grass isn't always greenier" situations and the next job is worse. I'm also concerned because all job postings want many duties I have little to no experience in. Many of these job listings combine 8 different jobs in my field and expect 1 person to do it all. And of course, do it all for shit pay.
I feel really lost and unqualified for these jobs. I don't think it's even worth applying. It took my so long to get this job. I really don't want to be struggling to find a job again. I really picked a crap field to work in.

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Current Information

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https://academic.oup.com/fpa/article/15/3/392/5482418 Author: Dieuwertje Kuijpers
Abstract:
"Studies analyzing the popularity of American presidents consistently find that even though casualties drag down approval rates over time, there is a temporarily positive effect in the beginning of the mission (also known as the rally effect). Are these findings generalizable to other advanced industrial Western democracies? This latter question has not yet been answered convincingly because of two issues: studies are either (1) limited to high profile cases (such as the Iraq War) or (2) based on US data only. I examine the effect of rising or falling military casualties on the change in the popularity of governing parties for ten OECD countries using a novel dataset that comprises monthly polling and economic data for these ten countries in the post–Cold War period. My analyses show that governing parties benefit from an increase in military casualties for at least a year but get punished from 4.5 years into the intervention".

“The lover carves into his soul the model of the beloved. In that way, the soul of the lover becomes the mirror in which the image of the loved one is reflected.” - Marsilio Ficino, Commentary on Plato's Symposium
Nietzsche’s criticisms of Hegel are often conflated with Schopenhauer’s. Often by people who type things like, “I’m in the Schopenhauer camp when it comes to Hegel and his ilk.” In a series of Beeps-and-Boops they copy-and-paste Schopenhauer’s loathing without any of Schopenhauer’s substance (which would require actually engaging with Schopenhauer and Hegel) instead these Thinkers exists as little framed photos on a candle covered shrine in Geocities. Even if they’re correct they’re still wrong and worthy of immediate scorn and derision. We must express the most profound sense of Christian Pity and Charity at the sight of their nakedness.
It’s easy to spiral on this particular subject but unbecoming, revealing, even damning. What they don’t seem to process, is that the seethe and the scolding and the tantrums are in their manner the highest form of compliment either philosopher could muster. That the younger Schopenhauer’s response to Hegel’s semantic blunder should be a kind of ecstatic fury that propelled his career as a philosopher. That Schopenhauer is endearing when he puts pen to paper and writes:
“May Hegel's philosophy of absolute nonsense - three-fourths cash and one-fourth crazy fancies - continue to pass for unfathomable wisdom without anyone suggesting as an appropriate motto for his writings Shakespeare's words: "Such stuff as madmen tongue and brain not," or, as an emblematical vignette, the cuttle-fish with its ink-bag, creating a cloud of darkness around it to prevent people from seeing what it is, with the device: mea caligine tutus. - May each day bring us, as hitherto, new systems adapted for University purposes, entirely made up of words and phrases and in a learned jargon besides, which allows people to talk whole days without saying anything; and may these delights never be disturbed by the Arabian proverb: "I hear the clappering of the mill, but I see no flour." - For all this is in accordance with the age and must have its course.”
Tempestuous little man. Without Hegel’s error what would’ve become of Schopenhauer? Would he have attempted to actively compete against Hegel? Hegel as the Phantom of Eric Roberts in the Killers Miss Atomic Bomb music video? The Other-Ghost, Hegel’s Smirking Geist cucking Schopenhauer, Sophia in his arms, Schopenhauer casts the wedding ring to the ground and runs away. As was the case in respect to Kierkegaard. Cucked out of marriage by the Ghost & Machine. “And it’s all in my head, but she’s touching his chest now, he takes off her dress now, LET ME GO. And I just can’t look it’s killing me. And taking control.”
An error is a wound is a mercy.
Nietzsche is different. Unlike Schopenhauer he doesn’t pretend to create a superior metaphysical system (the Platonic Carnivalesque) to rival Hegel’s.
I think the spirit of a Nietzschean critique of Hegel is best exemplified by aphorism 317 in Daybreak,
“The judgment of the evening. - He who reflects on the work he has done during the day and during his life, but does so when he has finished it and is tired, usually arrives at a melancholy conclusion: this however is not the fault of his day or his life, but of his tiredness. - In the midst of our work we usually have no leisure to pass judgment on life and existence, nor in the midst of our pleasures: but if we should happen to do so, we should no longer agree with him who waited for the seventh day and its repose before he decided that everything was very beautiful - he had let the better moment go by.”
Hegel as a Christian Nihilist and the Dialectic as Slave Morality. All finite forms of life attain their truth in the process of self-overcoming. Hegel uses Negativity to pacify an excess of Negativity. Hegel’s System annuls the Abyss. The Truth of any given determination is realized in its exhaustion. This Truth is what Remains. As part of a Whole. Eternal. Defeat for Hegel is what brings us to our Truth. That the subject’s defeat should purify it of its particularities and its impositions. My thoughts are already part of reality. This Knowledge leads to renunciation. I’m no longer attempting to impose or enforce myself on reality, to shape it in the heat of my perverse gaze. I look up at the stars and recognize a series of sores oozing out a brilliant light. In the Beggar’s Eye I see Christ. Saint Lazarus draped in indigo rags surrounded by dogs. In the Eyes of the King of the World, Christ. In the Illness the Cure. In the Poison the Medicine.
Hegel stands next to his student, the student looks up at the starry sky in awe. “They are the abode of the blessed.” Hegel grumbles, “The stars, hum! Hum! The stars are only a gleaming leprosy in the sky.’” Like Lorde, he never watches the stars because there’s so much down here. As he puts it in one lecture,
“The human being is this Night, this empty nothing which contains everything in its simplicity - a wealth of infinitely many representations, images, none of which occur to it directly, and none of which are not present. This [is] the Night; the interior of [human] nature, existing here - pure Self - [and] in phantasmagoric representations it is night everywhere: here a bloody head suddenly shoots up and there another white shape, only to disappear as suddenly. We see this Night when we look a human being in the eye, looking into a Night which turns, terrifying. [For from his eyes] the night of the world hangs out towards us.”
Let us then briefly think with Hegel whose underling problem is, from the very beginning of his thought, that of love.
What is Blue?
According to Goethe in his Theory of Colors,
“As yellow is always accompanied with light, so it may be said that blue still brings a principle of darkness with it.
This color has a peculiar and almost indescribable effect on the eye. As a hue it is powerful — but it is on the negative side, and in its highest purity is, as it were, a stimulating negation. Its appearance, then, is a kind of contradiction between excitement and repose.
As the upper sky and distant mountains appear blue, so a blue surface seems to retire from us.
But as we readily follow an agreeable object that flies from us, so we love to contemplate blue — not because it advances to us, but because it draws us after it.
Blue gives us an impression of cold, and thus, again, reminds us of shade. We have before spoken of its affinity with black.
Rooms which are hung with pure blue, appear in some degree larger, but at the same time empty and cold.
The appearance of objects seen through a blue glass is gloomy and melancholy.”
Goethe and a defense of Goethe’s critique of Newton’s Opticks unites Hegel and Schopenhauer. That color is produced by light and by what stands against it. Goethe who said that were the eye not of the sun how could we behold the light. Brilliant in the poetic continuity this expresses. A golden chain from Empedocles to Plato and Aristotle to the Stoics and so on. Summarized here elegantly by the physicist Arthur Zajonc, “the interior light coalesces with daylight, like to like, forming thereby a single homogenous body of light. That body, a marriage of inner light and outer, forges a link between the objects of the world and the soul. It becomes the bridge along which the subtle motions of an exterior object may pass, causing the sensation of sight.” Aristotle proposed the existence of a Proton Organon or Primary Instrument, an organ of congealed pneuma, located in the heart, that reconciles the division between the sensible and the intelligible. The Stoics would go on the rename this Mercurial (both volatile-subtle and fixed) Instrument, the Hegemonikon, the synthesizer or icon-maker. Whose function is to produce phantasms. The instrument through which the soul transmits all vital activities to the body and also the body’s way of capturing the sensations from the five senses and translating them into phantasms or images that could be understood by the soul.
The Lover longing loving unrequited. Smiling like she means it. Being-thrown into this World. Never fully at home, refracted, out of joint. That this affliction is our common inheritance. I think this is our patrimony. We are the heirs of this Abyss. It is to some degree I think fundamentally "Western" fundamentally "Romantic". Regardless of political opinion or alignment. It speaks to us. Through us. Perhaps it's because the Republic of Letters is largely comprised of Melancholic Perverts. Nostalgia or homesickness, as a longing for a reality which can only be possessed through the imagination and through the dream, the genuine site of anamnesis or recollection in the unreal. Evoking for us the movement of the soul described by the Venetian Magician-Philosopher Guilio Camillo; descending through the Lunar Gate of Cancer (of man), drinking from the cup of Bacchus and, depending on how much one imbibes, forgetting about all the things ‘up there’ before making our way back through the Saturnine Gate of Capricorn (of the gods). Tightrope walking to Luna. I see her so very clearly. My Corporeal Dasha, Giordano Bruno would rebuke me harshly, that I should Simp as I do for "these eyes, these ears, this blush, this tongue, this tooth, this hair, this dress, this coat, this little shoe .. . , this sun in eclipse, this crazy person, this slut, this stench, this deathbed, this privy, this mensturation, this corpse... which, by means of a superficial appearance, a shadow, a phantasm, a dream, a Circe-like charm in the service of procreation, deceives us by taking the form of beauty." Fuck it. Yet there is an Image behind the Image, a Woman behind my woman. The Platonic Dasha. Daria the Luminous Homunculi. Madonna Intelligenza who has served as a guide throughout this journey. “Keep your eyes on me.” I wobble on the tightrope, your eyes are what kept me, you and your rose-wreathed heart lit. A Unity-of-Opposites. Georges Bataille writes in The Sorcerer's Apprentice, “The image through which, in an instant, destiny has become alive thus finds itself projected into a world foreign to everyday agitation. The woman toward whom a man is draw, as to his human destiny, no longer belongs to the space that money controls. Her sweetness escapes the real world, through which she moves without allowing herself to be any more imprisoned than a dream. Misfortune would ravage the spirit anyone who lets himself be possessed by the need to reduce her.”
On Love Hegel writes, “Since love is a sensing of something living, lovers can be distinct only in so far as they are mortal and do not look upon this possibility of separation as if there were really a separation or as if reality were a sort of conjunction between possibility and existence. In the lovers there is no matter; they are a living whole.” That the Unity of Love is informed precisely by the division or difference between the Lover and the Beloved. The Union of Love, “…can remain so only as long as the separate lovers are opposed solely in the sense that the one loves and the other is loved, i.e., that each separate lover is one organ in a living whole.”
Here we might ponder Hegel’s Philosophy as a Philosophy of Death. The vespers-born melancholy conclusion is perhaps being that all Love is Unrequited. As Marsilio Ficino notes in his Commentary on Plato’s Symposium, “Insofar as it is death, it is bitter, and insofar it is voluntary, it is sweet. He who loves dies; for his consciousness, oblivious of himself, is devoted exclusively to the loved one, and a man who is not conscious of himself is certainly not conscious in himself. Therefore, a soul that is so affected, does not function in itself, because the primary function of the soul is consciousness…. Therefore, the unrequited lover lives nowhere; he is completely dead.”
Blue the color of Sulfur ignited. Blue the color of the Ocean of the Dead, of Dasein. The blue knees of a prayerful lover and the blue lips of the lovelorn fool, “Here’s to my love - O true apothecary! Thy drugs are quick. - Thus with a kiss I die.” That the smell of bitter almonds should remind the good doctor of unrequited love.
Such a melancholy conclusion can only be produced by a proper melancholic. Melancholy was regarded by Ficino as one of seven exemptions in which the bond between body and soul was weakened, allowing the soul to take flight and acquire the gifts of premonition and clairvoyance. Saint Albertus Magnus writes of the two kinds of melancholy. Hot melancholy and its two primary effects on the subject’s phantasmic activity he describes thusly,
“The first consists in the mobility of the phantasms within the subtle organism: the second, in the great capacity of phantasms to stay impressed upon the pneuma. This brings with it, besides a prodigious memory, an extraordinary capacity for analysis. This is why, Ficino tells us, 'all the great man who have ever excelled in an art have been melancholic. Either because they were born so or become so through assiduous meditation.”
Philosophy begins with this Unhappy Consciousness. The Alienated Soul lithe and loveless, which is the consciousness of self as a divided nature, a doubled and merely contradictory being. Dissatisfied with its Self and the World it retreats inward, like a Nymph fleeing Pan, fleeing into Reflection, which might likewise take the form of a fleeing into Nature (think Thoreau’s Walden). Herein is the mirk. This Narcissistic dialectic between Subject and Phantasmata. The Ouroboric Narcissism of the Beautiful Soul.
Another affliction associated with Melancholy is Hysteria. The Psychoanalyst Jacques Lacan refers to Hegel as the most Sublime Hysteric. The Hysteric asks questions because they experience their own desire as if it were the desire of the Other.
The Spirit retreats into a pre-rational state of life, a Life of Feeling, that this feeling expresses a movement in which the soul is no longer simply natural, but able to realize a mastery over itself.
“Finally, in the “feeling of self,” the individual becomes “a sensitive totality.” But the gradual formation of the ‘I’ is paradoxically accompanied by a loss of fluidity, leading to “ruin and disaster within the conscious spirit.” This crisis results from the fact that the subject, being constituted in a free relation to the self, feels at the same time like ‘another’, and this tension pushes it into a state of ‘trembling’ (durchzittern).” The Future of Hegel, Plasticity, Temporality, Dialectics, Catherine Malabou.
How does Hegel escape? Or perhaps more accurately how can we escape this trap? This Pneumatic Mirror-World. Of Subject-Mirror-Phantasmata. The Romantic Prison? Of one who learns of Love in order to be Loveless? Hold that thought.
Returning to the color blue, the psychologist James Hillman writes in Alchemical Psychology,
“This is the realm of the alchemical (kyanos, blue; kynos, dog); blue takes on a dog-like quality: hangdog and dirty dog, both. Why does depression seek porn? For arousal? For Eros and Priapos and Venus to come to life? Rather, I think, to maintain the depression, to re-direct the verticality of desire downward and backward (doggy fashion), clipping the wings of eros. Pornography - an opus contra naturam, a counter-instinct of the psyche, perverting the conventionally natural, enslaving, torturing; an erotics of despair.
To translate these esoteric references into the blue dog’s perverse obsessions we discover this: Invisible Hades appears in the world as Dionysus. There is a divine (i.e., invisible, unfathomable) impulse that seeks to enter ordinary life. It wants to know the soul in the Biblical sense. Carnal knowledge, intimate knowledge, knowledge of intimates. (Hence the innumerable images of copulation throughout alchemy.) The soul longs for this copulation, and sings its longing in the blues, blueing its own flesh, drawing the divine down into the ordinary body. (Hence the blues’ libidinous mood.)”
My Cup Overfloweth.
Pure thinking-subjectivity is phantasmological or hauntological. The role of the Phantasmata in the context of medieval philosophy, is described exquisitely by Mauricio Loza in The Hounds of Actaeon. The Phantasm or Phantom is understood “as a mental image with effects reaching not only the level of perception but that of social construction, the phantasm exists in the twilight between the objective and the subjectivity, the material and the immaterial, a zone of indistinction between reality and unreality. This is why the phantasm pulls us towards the twilight from whence it comes: Its central action is to drag us into the shadow of the world.”
Minerva’s Owls unfurls its wings only with the falling of dusk.
For the great Persian scholar Avicenna, sensory phantasms were processed through five virtues or powers corresponding to five cavities in the cranium; phantasy or common sense, imagination, cogitative virtue, the estimative virtue, and finally the reminiscent virtue. According to Georgio Agamben in his work Stanzas: Word and Phantasm in Western Culture, Avicenna conceives of this gradation through the inner senses as a "progressive 'disrobing' (denudatio) of the phantasm from its material accidents."
Material accidents in this instance, evoking the etymological origins and proliferation into common speech of the word "accident" itself.
Ad - 'towards to' and cadere - 'to fall'. The Latin Accident - 'happening' used in late Middle English to refer to 'an Event'. Used to refer to the parts of the sacred bread and wine that remained after the transubstantiation through the sacrament of The Holy Eucharist,
“Thus, throughout the history of Scholasticism we have to do with a sort of triangle of intellectual forces: Realism and Nominalism fighting a five hundred years’ war, and the Church, in its official capacity, anxiously endeavouring to hold the balance between them. One wonders whether the three parties to this ancient dispute may not have found symbolic expression in Tweedledum, Tweedledee, and the ‘Monstrous Crow’ of nursery legend. But it is no disparagement of the intellects of that day to say that to us the chief interest of their polemics lies in the many new and accurate instruments of thought with which they provided us. The common word accident is an excellent example. We use it every day without realizing that it was only imported from Latin by the indefatigable efforts of the Schoolmen to reconcile the doctrine of Realism with the Catholic dogma of Transubstantiation. The accidents, when they first came into the English language, meant that part of the sacred bread and wine which remained after the substance had been transmuted into the body and blood of Christ.” History in English Words, Owen Barfield
Here we see a process of Pneuma returning to Pneuma through this process of Rising and Falling. That the Absolute Idea is a Radiant Star. That the Phantasm undergoes a kind of purification process, from the sensible to the spiritual to the mnemonic. That this purification entails a kind of excremental remainder. A material accident. An excess which goes?
This brings to mind the question that the Sophist Parmenides (in Plato's Parmenides) raises to Socrates, which forces Socrates to admit to his own limitations. It utterly stumps the Apostate Tragedian. That being whether or not there is an eidos or Pure Idea of the lowest material things. Things like excrement and dust and I might add these eyes, these ears, this blush, this tongue, this tooth, this hair, this dress, this coat, this little shoe .. . , this sun in eclipse, this crazy person, this slut, this stench, this deathbed, this privy, this mensturation, this corpse...
The Ghost and The Star
Recall the episode with Hegel comparing stars to leprosy sores. This got out around town and Hegel found himself having to address this controversy,
"It has been rumoured round the town that I have compared the stars to a rash on an organism where the skin erupts in an countless mass of red spots: or to an ant-heap in which too, there is Understanding and necessity. In fact, I do rate what is concrete higher than what is abstract, and an animality that develops into no more than a slime, higher than the starry host."
The rock is a rock.
Hegel defines the Domain of Art as the “sensible appearing of the idea”… or the Idea given expression in Sensuous Form. This is to be understood as The Star shining through The Ghost. This opposition between Form and Content. This Contradiction is what animates the Motion of Spirit. From Art towards Philosophy.
She is and is not. Ah wait. I'm not her. But in this regard I am the same and suddenly the Ghost is Concretized.
Alexandre Kojève in his Lectures on the Phenomenology of Spirit writes,
"It is known that Hegel asserted that his knowledge is circular, and that circularity is the necessary and sufficient condition of absolute truth - that is, of complete, universal, and definitive (or "eternal") truth."
The Hysterics quandary finds some resolution. The question of the Other is reflexively transformed into the answer to the question.
"In the Wise Man's absolute Knowledge, each question is its own answer, but is so only because he goes through the totality of questions-answers that forms the entirety of the System. Likewise, in his existence, the Wise Man remains in identity with himself, he is closed up in himself; but he remains in identity with himself because he passes through the totality of others, and is closed up in himself. Which (according to the Phenomenology) means, quite simply, that the only man who can be Wise is a Citizen of the universal and homogeneous State - that is to say, the State of the Tun Aller und Jeder, in which each man exists only through and for the whole, and the whole exists through and for each man."
We return to Self-Consciousness. We're not the same. We're different. Tonight.
Eros pins Pan. Chronos clips Eros’ wings. Compulsion is overcome by Love. Love is overcome by Time. Love can only be actualized and concretized through Time. When it must Dwell in a given Space. This is the Poetic-Plasticity. This is the Commitment.
“Desire has reserved to itself the pure negating of the object and thereby unalloyed feeling of self. This satisfaction, however, just for that reason is itself only a state of evanescence, for it lacks objectivity or subsistence. Labour, on the other hand, is desire restrained and checked, evanescence delayed and postponed; in other words, labour shapes and fashions the thing.” (Phenomenology of Spirit)
We begin with the Problem of Love and in the Problem find the Solution. Love is the Answer to the Question of Love. Loving is to give what one does not have.
Our Unrequited Love is Mutual,
“In fact, there is only one death in mutual love, but there are two resurrections, for a lover dies within himself the moment he forgets about himself, but he returns to life immediately in his loved one as soon as the loved ones embraces him in loving contemplation. He is resurrected once more when he finally recognizes himself in his beloved and no longer doubts that he is loved. O, happy death, which is followed by two loves. O, wondrous exchange in which each gives himself up for the other, and has the other, yet does not cease to have himself.” Commentary on Plato's Symposium, Marsilio Ficino.
To be Overcome is to Animate. This is the Labor of Love. Productive Labor as Art.
You understand why Hegel is so very frustrating? In his System. In the Movement from East to West back East. We find the Heiros Gamos, the Sacred Matrimony of Eros and Sophia, and in this Unity of Opposites the philosopher becomes the Sage. In the production of this Heiros Gamos, Hegel's System becomes the Perfect Pneumatic Circle.
​
I make of Nietzsche a traveling companion through Hegel’s Aesthetics. Why? Because The Birth of Tragedy is crudely Hegelian. Here we find ourselves encountering what is so very frustrating about Hegel and his Pneumatic Circle, his method and his system. From the occultists perspective this is because Hegel’s System is an Artifice of Sacral or Mythic Time, of Cyclical Time. The genuinely infuriating thing is realizing that the Artifice, the “Copy” is in fact the original. This is why some speak of the feminizing effect of Hegel. Feminizing in the way Achilles’ is feminized by Scamander. That not only do we never step in the same river twice and that the river is the site of the Doom-driven Hero’s self-fulfilling prophesy.
As Nietzsche himself puts it, “one cannot refute an eye disease.” I thought it would be stimulating to read The Birth of Tragedy through the lens of Hegel’s Lectures on Aesthetics. Framing Nietzsche and his insights within a Hegelian Tableaux. Nietzsche who denounces Metaphysical Systematization. Demurely objecting he says, “unhand me woman,” with a little blush. Does he mean it? I don’t think it was Hegel’s Dialectical Method or Logic that Nietzsche objected too. Denouncing instead the refraction between the Philosopher and the Logic (an ironic detachment)… that the Philosopher and his Logic are not two separate beings. That for him the Philosopher is Alkahest or Universal Solvent. Body and Soul collapse into a singularity, Art and Artists. No, in a sense Nietzsche celebrates the animating antagonism at the Heart of Hegel’s work. That this refraction is what results in the System which Nietzsche saw as modeling contemporary German Bourgeois fearfulness and timidity simply solidifies into Consensus. “I’m old and I don’t want to be alone.” That the System should be a kind of Metaphysical Prison concretized around the Fiery Pneuma, the brilliance of Hegel’s Esprit.
The application of the Dialectical Method is evidenced throughout The Birth of Tragedy; The Apollonian thesis, the Dionysian antithesis, the Tragic synthesis. Or perhaps in a manner more accurate to Hegel; The Dionysian Abstract, the Apollonian Negation, the Tragic Negation-of-Negation, and the Socratic Concretization.
The section dedicated to a retrospective appraisal of The Birth of Tragedy in Ecce Homo, Nietzsche concludes that all the good things he had ever written about Richard Wagner were actually about him. He was talking about himself the whole time without even realizing it, “"Even psychologically all decisive traits of my own nature are projected into Wagner’s - the close proximity of the brightest and the most calamitous forces, the will to power as no man ever possessed it, the ruthless courage in matters of the spirit, the unlimited power to learn without damage to the will to act.” Poor Nietzsche he who was too high-strung for his own good. Comes to a conclusion paralleling Hegel as it concerns Art, specifically Music. Perhaps one day, there will be Dionysian future for music. But for now, the Pneuma roils through space-and-time, and it culminates in Nietzsche or Zarathustra, as the Last Philosopher or the first Tragic Philosopher. Who despite all the aristocratic pretensions cannot help but write in a popular and accessible manner. Writing into motion the conditions for the Dionysian resurgence he had once thought was being spearheaded by the compositions of Richard Wagner.
He goes so far as to be both Beethoven and Goethe’s response to Beethoven in the anticipation of his works and in the need for them to remain ‘exclusive’ despite their undeniably popular character. Goethe in his old age weeping softly to Beethoven’s sonatas, proclaims “If such music were performed by a large orchestra, it would destroy everything around it.”
The stylish and inspirited Vitalism of Nietzsche’s ruminations is Pneumatic. A red dot in the center of a dark blue sphere.
Dialectics reveals an Infinite Spiral. The Circle divided by a straight-line. Containing the spiral. The straight-line breaks through the circle. Above and Below. Revealing three other spheres. Above the configuration one spiral. Beneath it two spirals; one winding up and the other winding down. On a Hegelian theological note. God the Father and God the Holy Spirit proceed from God the Son. “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.” John 1:1.
Here we might locate the Traumatic Temporality of Christianity. The introduction of History. Time as Chronos. With God the Son. Without the historical personage of Jesus Christ, there wouldn’t be a Trinitarian Unity and Division. From God the Son proceeds God the Father and God the Holy Spirit. In this wound we are brought to an awareness of another Time. A Timeless-Time or a Time sans History. “In the Beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God,” a time in which God the Father, God the Son, God the Holy Spirit had always been. The Triune God. Whether or not, in this Aionic Time, God the Holy Spirit proceeds from God the Father or from God the Father and God the Son, is the division between East and West.
This Times overlap and nowhere is this more evident than in the anachronisms or perhaps more accurately, the Archeo-modernity, of the romantic painting. Or perhaps further still, in the Ethiopian depiction of Christ, in the Korean depiction of Christ, and in the Italian depiction of Christ. Black Jesus, Asian Jesus, and European Jesus.
As that obscure note by Nietzsche produced by Gilles Deleuze in his work Nietzsche and Philosophy goes, “Universal chaos which excluded all purposeful activity does not contradict the idea of the cycle; for this idea is only an irrational necessity.” Here we see Nietzsche approaching something akin to the Infinite Dialectic realized and developed in Mao Zedong’s contributions to Dialectical and Historical Materialism. As Mao writes in On Contradiction, “The universality or absoluteness of contradiction has a twofold meaning. One is that contradiction exists in the process of development of all things, and the other is that in the process of development of each thing a movement of opposites exists from beginning to end.”
The stylish and inspirited Vitalism of Nietzsche’s ruminations is Pneumatic. Being Pneumatic it is Phantasmic. Here we locate the Girardian critique of Nietzsche. As Nietzsche proclaims in Ecce Homo that everything his was praising Wagner for is in fact praise he was unconsciously directing at himself, at his values or innate dignities, the obverse is true. For Nietzsche every great philosophical work is a confessional, an involuntary and unconscious autobiography. He invents the Overman and by extension the Last Man. Will to Power and Ressentiment. One cannot exist without the other and in Nietzsche they collapse into a singularity (a point worth keeping in mind when we eventually venture into Deleuze and his Anti-Hegelianism). The Last Philosopher. In sum Girard’s contention is that in the production of these Phantasmata, Nietzsche ends up offering to his audience another Scapegoat. The Man of Ressentiment and the Slave Morality. Obviously within Nietzsche the potential for this is treated triumphantly. Nietzsche refuses to have his Poetic Revelry stifled by timorous considerations. That stupid people might read his works and take it as an excuse to persecute Christians or to locate the Man of Ressentiment in their political adversaries. That they might completely forget the contradictions inherent to the very office of “Tragic Philosopher” and how the Vagabond and the Prophet are a singular figure, hybrid and lovelorn and glorious. “If I had power I’d know how to immediately and brutally exercise it.” None of this concerns Nietzsche. People will misinterpret you regardless. Still the points are well worth reflecting on and prove stimulating as we move from the Symbolic-Classical to the Classical-Romantic.

So since being POMO for a year or so I have this sister who tries to get in contact all the time. She's an elders wife and studied with me when I was reinstated. She's one of the main reasons I started hating meeting because were taught that the love jws show to each other is true and better than any love form anyone in the "world" but everyone sees her actions towards me as loving yet they really aren't and she makes my skin crawl, and yet somehow I'm ungrateful.
Background, this sister was around for both my children's births (not the actual births, but saw them like days after being born and had been in their lives regularly) and has been around me for years since I moved to the area as a teenager (nearly 30 now). She has had many many conversations with me. I've discussed my likes, dislikes and loads of family info with her. And I purposefully remembered as many things about her. Fav colour (and wrote her cards with that colour on the front), her pet and extended family who are not jws names and history, her address, her phone number, even what brand of coffee she liked so I could go out for my way to buy some for when she came over for a study (I didn't drink coffee back then).
All this to say I was trying to show that I remembered stuff about her because it was important and that's what showing love is truly about.
Well after fading and waiting for my disassociation to be announced, I had a voice message today from her. I debated listening to it as she waffles, but I did and it cemented my belief that she doesn't care about me at all.
To anyone outside it may have seemed like a kind message "she has some clothes for me and stuff for the kids, and had a big cream cake to drop round' so wants me to tell her when I'm in so she can do that...
The reasons why that is so unloving...
1)I'm autistic and struggle with verbal communication and have stressed several times, don't call me or leave voice notes, text me in some way so I can re-read the message and actually understand it. Show you care by texting, not voice messaging...she refuses to do this.
2) she always asks about my kids but never uses their correct names even thought he youngest is 6 and she's known their names since before they were born. She knows I hate nicknames and insists on calling my son one (I won't say his actual name but imagine having a kid called Timothy and someone calling him mothy...it's horrible and not a nice nickname at that.) And my daughter's name is lovely but she refuses to call her by it. Making it longer and changing it to something completely different (again, not her real name, but imagine a child called laura-lee and havign it constantly pronounced laurie-leigha 🤮)
3) she continually has clear outs of her clothes and drops them round to me WITHOUT notifying me. Shell just dump them on my pimi family or literally drop them outside my door and txt me as she drives off. It's usually tons of kid junk from her nephew or clothes for meetings which are completely the wrong size (we're 3 to 4 sizes different) so I'm constantly having my house filled with her unwanted junk even though I've explained I don't want it and I'm not her size so "stop it"!
4) she knows my husband has an awful egg allergy and not only am i lactose intolerant, but me and the kids suffer with eczema from eating lactose and fatty milk/cream, yet she continually makes giant fresh cream cakes (with egg) and asks to drop them off all the time when literally none of us can eat them. She's also done this with pies and called in uninvited to drop them off when none of us can eat them (pastry made with egg and other things she knows we can't eat cause of dietary reasons)
But besides these reasons that show her text isnt motivated by real love heres soem more reasons...
5) she knows both my kids are on the autism spectrum too, they are very particular about what foods they can and can't eat yet and does not listen to us about dietary needs and intolerances and continually give my pimi family snacks and treats for them which I don't allow them to have and she knows this (like I said, she's been there since they were first born so she's had over 7 years to remember)
6) again, my son has many autistic needs as a baby but cause her nephew has mild needs she assumed mine was the same and treated him as her nephew had been which was not healthy for my son and his needs. I would continually tell her he needs different treatment than she's used to, but she refused to listen and would say "oh ok" but then never do it the next time.
7) when I was going to meetings she would badger me constantly about having my daughter sit with her (for someone who loves her so much she can't even say her name right). I gave in after years of this (it started as soon as she could toddle). One time my daughter wanted to answer, she couldn't read but would be whispered answers and repeat. Ya know, typical kids JW answers. Well, while sitting with this sister (who, again, knew she couldn't read yet) my daughter asked for an answer and was told to put her hand up. She did, the mic came, and the sister held up her watchtower and painted to the paragraph and expected her to read the answer she'd underlined. My daughter was stunned,shocked, embarrassed and cried immediately running back to me. She never wanted to sit with her again and then I'm amde out to be a bad parent and controlling because my 3 year old was embarrassed in front of a hundred people and put on the spot so she didn't feel safe with that sister anymore.
This sister always tries to come off as considerate and loving, but all of her actions, despite asking nicely and explaining for over 7 years, are so self-esteem boosting for her but just go to further my proof that she has never tried to really care about
It just infuriates me that they all try to say they're loving and really care about you but their actions only ever show the opposite. It's as if they show up and keep in touch to do these things so they can show other "look how loving I am, I do X and X and X for them even tho they're not in meetings anymore". to try and tick her imaginery box on her goodie two sheos list and appease her conscience or something.
I don't want to sound ungrateful. I'm usually the most gracious person when people give me things, and am very appreciative. We've struggled a lot financially so other people popping down clothes fo toys for the kids were appreciated so much. Its this one sister. She says ove and over she cares but though I've been appreciative in the past and siad thank you but reminded her of oumy specific needs, and dealt with handing off these items to charity shops and other people, if it keeps happening and she makes no change to how she approaches me and these situations, she's not really doing it for us and to show she cares. And after 7 years or constant reminding, I think that's long enough to make at least some small changes. I've had worldly friends make more changes in those 7 years to actually learn about what I needed as a person and shower true love.
It just grinds my gears and I'm so glad I have a reason to never have to talk to her and so many others again now.

​
Demographics

• Gender: Male
• Race/Ethnicity: Asian
• Residence: US
• Income Bracket: 100-200k
• Type of School: Competitive Public (sends multiple ppl to T-20s every year, already had 3 people get into Stanford REA...)
• Hooks (Recruited Athlete, URM, First-Gen, Geographic, Legacy, etc.): none.

Intended Major(s): Political Science, International Affairs (depending on school), maybe double major with Econ
Academics

• GPA (UW/W): 3.92 UW (school doesn't do weighted)
• Rank (or percentile): N/A, school doesn't rank
• # of Honors/AP/IB/Dual Enrollment/etc.:
  • did full IB Diploma and a total of 10 APs across high school, all other classes were "honors" classes.
• Senior Year Course Load: APES, Senior English, Orchestra, AP Micro and Macroeconomics, AP Stats (school allows us to do IB Diploma a year early so I completed it by junior year, and I'm mostly just taking filler classes this year).

Standardized Testing
List the highest scores earned and all scores that were reported.

• SAT I: 1520 (780RW, 740M)
• ACT: didn't take
• SAT II: none
• AP/IB:
  • Full IB Diploma, 41/45. (HL in English, Music, History).
  • 6 AP Exams taken: World History (5), Chinese (5), APUSH (5), French (4), English Lang/Comp (5), AP Gov (5)
• Other (ex. IELTS, TOEFL, etc.): none

Extracurriculars/Activities
Details are edited to avoid doxxing lmfao:

1. Secretariat for largest Model UN Conference in my state. Ran conferences' outreach (researched contacts/wrote emails), supervised registration process for 600+ attendees, managed PR and hotel rooming.
2. President of my school's Model UN Club. Trained 50+ club members with weekly public speaking/debate lessons, oversaw members' conference attendance/logistics & club advertising/fundraisers.
3. Committee Director for 3 local Model UN Conferences. Oversaw 3 member dais team, spearheaded research into committees' topic, revised background guide research paper, lead debate on conference day.
4. President of local organization's Teen Board. Created board subcommittees to improve efficiency. Relay teen feedback to staff, run community bonding/service events, train new volunteers.
5. Internship at local law firm. Schedule consultations, contact old clients/close cases, assemble exhibit binders for trials, file case documents, act as receptionist.
6. Member of cultural organization. Volunteered at multi-cultural festivals (ran culture/game booths), created programming (videos, presentations, etc) to educate others about [my ethnicity's] culture.
7. Camp Counselor for special-needs kids. Organized arts/sports related activities for special needs campers aged 10-13, provide one-on-one guidance with them.
8. Pianist for 10 years. earned Associated Board of Royal Schools of Music Grade 8 Piano Performance Exam Distinction score (highest possible score).
9. Violinist. Been playing for 7 years, auditioned into and entered local youth symphony's top group in freshman year - present day, also a violinist in high school's top orchestral group.
10. Boba Barista (job!!). Worked like 8 hrs a week.

Awards/Honors (also edited to prevent doxxing)
List all awards and honors submitted on your application.

1. Presidential Volunteer Service Award Gold (Teen, 2020) Bronze (Young Adult, 2021 & 2022)
2. Nationwide Music Competition- 2nd Prize Winner, Piano (state-level)
3. All-State Symphonic Orchestra participant (11th and 12th grade)
4. Best Position Paper from local MUN conference

Letters of Recommendation
I waived my rights via FERPA so I’m just guessing here.
English Teacher (7/10): Had her for both junior and senior year, had a pretty good relationship with her in class and always did my work- nothing extraordinary. She's a good writer though, so I trust her letter!
Bio Teacher (6/10): TBH only really chose her because I thought you needed one STEM and one humanities rec for every school. She definitely saw my academic side (I pestered her a lot about my Bio IA...) but beyond that I'm not sure...
Counselor (7/10): Didn't really know counselor too well, but I filled out her worksheet pretty thoroughly. She also asked for some of my other teachers to give her insight, so I had my IB Music and my orchestra director give her more info about me from a different point of view. She has lots of experience writing letters so I'm sure she was able to put together a good letter from all of the info she got from me and other teachers.
Interviews
Georgetown (6/10): my first interview, it was in-person and in the interviewer's office. Needless to say, I was terrified and spent 5 minutes in my parent's car just doing last-minute rehearsing before actually getting out. It went OK- it was decent for a first interview, but I think I rambled a bit too much about my academic self and didn't really get into my personality/hobbies and what really made me, me. Interviewer's interests didn't really line up with mine beyond academics so thats what we naturally focused about. It was a solid hour, but very chill in the end (I shouldn't have been that stressed lol).
Princeton (7/10): Was much more prepared for this interview. It was virtual, and lasted like 40 minutes. She asked me a few questions- I think I was definitely able to express and articulate myself a lot better compared to my Georgetown one, but I'm afraid I was thrown a bit off guard about the "Why Princeton/major" question she asked me and so my answer for that wasn't as perfect. Otherwise, I spent the last like 10-15 minutes asking her about Princeton stuff. It was a standard interview.
Columbia/Sciences Po Dual Degree Program (9/10): this interview was definitely my best interview by far because I was hella stressed for it, so I researched as much as I could about it- I really demonstrated my interest in Asian politics through specific examples, and I was well-articulated about why I wanted to attend not one, but two prestigious schools in the span of 4 years (and like, why France specifically). The Sciences Po admissions officer was having some connectivity issues but besides that it was a very solid interview.
Franklin and Marshall (9/10): It was with a current, international student, and we basically bonded over wanting new experiences in college and like this idea of college in general. He said that I was one of his favorite interviewees so that was nice?? Got to ask him a lot about the school and I was very passionate in my answers, much more chill than Georgetown/Princeton ones (tbh those top-schools kinda psyched me out...)
Wesleyan (7/10): I can't really remember what went down in this one tbh. At this point senioritis was kicking in and everything was mostly a blur LMFAO.
Essays
My CommonApp essay was... probably not the best. Topic was kind of basic, and the writing was meh. Unfortunately, I didn't really have time to edit it, because I got super busy with MUN things in the fall + senioritis hit early... so I really tried to perfect my supps. It was still a solid essay overall and I liked it, but I wish I started brainstorming about it earlier so I could've found a more niche idea/used some of the ideas I had in my supps for this main essay. Definitely should've done my dream school applications (ie, Georgetown) last instead of first since I naturally got so much better over time. Don't underestimate how your writing ability can skyrocket in the span of 5 months!!
Decisions (indicate ED/EA/REA/SCEA/RD)
Acceptances:

• COLUMBIA/SCIENCES PO DUAL-DEGREE PROGRAM!! (RD)
• WashU in St. Louis (RD) (holy shit this one spooked me, I only applied bc I got a fee waiver, I did submit the video though but didn't do an interview)
• George Washington University (20k/year Presidential Scholarship) (RD)
• William and Mary (RD) (got a likely too!)
• UC Irvine (RD)
• Franklin and Marshall College (15k/year Leadership Scholarship + Program) (RD)
• University of Wisconsin-Madison (EA)
• Whitman College (RD)
• UW Seattle (RD)
• Temple University (Honors Program/Scholarship) (Rolling)
• Arizona State University (Rolling)

Waitlists:

• Wesleyan University (RD Waitlist)
• Boston University (RD Waitlist)
• American University (RD Waitlist) (this one stung ;-;)
• UC Berkeley (RD —> Waitlist)
• UMich (EA —> Defer —> Waitlist)

Rejections:

• Northeastern University (EA Deferred Rejected)
• UCLA (RD Rejected)
• Georgetown (EA —> defer —> rejected)
• Princeton (RD —> rejected)
• University of Maryland (RD —> Rejected)

Additional Information:
This whole journey has definitely been a process. I came into the college app process thinking I had a solid chance at schools like Georgetown, Boston U, and Northeastern, with UPenn as a hard reach. I ended up not even applying to UPenn and getting rejected from Georgetown, BU, and NEU, but got some amazing acceptances that came really out of the blue (still reeling over WashU.... like I applied on a whim???).
I do really regret applying to all of the OOS public schools that I did- especially the UCs- since I can't afford OOS tuition, but I think overall my list was rather balanced. Seeing all of those reaches reject me stung (Georgetown sent me on an emotional rollercoaster and my heart dropped when I found out that BU had a 10% acceptance rate this year) but all it takes is one reach for there to be success! I'm most likely going to end up committing to Columbia/Science Po (top school in France AND in US??? Hell yeah!), but all in all I'm so glad that this process is finally over <3 going to take a long fucking nap.