Sarah, I’m honestly not quite sure how I’m going to muster the words that I want to give to you before you go. But this is my best shot. Be it too little, or too late, I believe I owe it to you. Because it’s been eating me alive not being able to express myself in the time we have left.
I hope this letter allows us both to have a little closure. I want you to know that not a day, nor an hour that goes by where you don’t cross my mind. I’d hardly call it “crossing”, it’s definitely more of a ponder. A recollection, one with a beginning, middle and an end. Except it’s not one of those happy endings that an audience holds out for. But sometimes I guess a cliché ending doesn’t fit every narrative.
I see you in everything I do, every time I play games now, I remember how much you would love to be playing with us. Or whenever I find a cute or a funny video, how you’d give me some kind of silly reaction, that would absolutely make my day. Better yet, every time I pop one of my pimples, I miss the way your hands felt on my skin. I’ve never appreciated brown eyes as much as I had when I looked at yours. I remember eating our lunch after we shopped for my kitchen, atop _____, and the sun hit your eyes so perfectly it was one of the most beautiful shades of golden brown I had ever seen. Though my tears are mere kaleidoscopes, I can still see them more vividly than ever in your absence.
To say “adjusting” to life without you has been hard would be an understatement. It’s 9:06pm right now, normally I’d be laughing away on the phone to you, wishing you the best sleep. It’s a Sunday, I don’t want to sleep, because the days pass too slowly to justify an early bedtime. Weekends now a drag without plans, like the world’s come to close. I’m now discovering that my playlist of sad songs is still not long enough to ease a lonesome heart. By the time the last song ends, it’s like the last piece of the puzzle just won’t fit. Like a monumental effort ends unsatisfied. Unfinished, to be shelved longing for a layer of dust.
It hits home that everything we talked about, excelling in our careers, a beautiful home, and 4 children to call a family, and maybe a fluffy companion. Unpacking my boxes in my first home, finding your gifts, photos, memories like the start to one of those beautiful love stories. The ones with the cliché endings. Call it rose tinted glasses if you will, but every smile was beyond real.
I think my favourite thing about you that I will miss the most is your laugh, all of them, even the pity laugh I’d get for taking a joke way too far. Your ambition and self-discipline are truly admirable. Your energy, had to be your absolute best quality. When you walked into a room, no matter how big, you best believe that every person in that room knew, Sarah had arrived. To go anywhere with you, Maria’s Christmas games, Lucy’s wedding, Jordan’s barbeque, both of our 21st, not only was I humbled and blessed, but now realise how lucky I was to call you mine and me, yours.
Your family will be impossible not to miss, every single person in your family is so intelligent, gentle, so put together, and so welcoming to someone like me. I never knew family like I do now until after I met you. No family is perfect, but yours was nothing but perfect to me. I am forever grateful for the roof your mother gave me, the job your father gave me, the gifts your sisters gave me, and the memories the rest of your family gave me. What was once a flame that burnt so strong, from that moment at the _, the 11th of December to the 12th of March, with everything in the years between. Getting me home in an Uber after I told you I loved you. Staying up late Christmas Eve playing Secret Hitler. Texting you happy New Years. To our trip to _. To our first ____ trip. To meeting your mum and sisters for dinner. To meeting your dad down the coast. To meeting my best friend over our new favourite place to eat. Surprising you at 5am with roses on valentines. To my house flooding and spending our first week living together at ____ whilst we watched everything go down-hill, everything was still perfect with you. To our trip to _, our first holiday. To celebrating my 21st birthday. To seeing my first musical. To our trip to _, a once in a lifetime opportunity. To celebrating your 21st. To our trip to ____. To spending Christmas night with your family. And every date, movie night, game night, breakfast, lunch, dinner in-between. Now like a flame at sunrise, reduced to embers and coals, still warm, awaiting to be ignited once more, with a potential for a wildfire.
Walking away from everything I knew the last nearly 5 years, has felt like running away from home. Like a moth to flame, my actions and thoughts intangible, longing for permanence and security. Your memory weaves its way into every crevice in my brain, forever reminding me of what I wish for. Now our paths draw parallel. Open to opportunity and new adventures, I’m not sure how, or when I’ll come to terms with that, but I know you would want me to try.
I’ll miss having someone who showed me unconditional love, in the darkest of nights. In my hardest moments, in my lowest times, you still thought I was fucking awesome, and nothing has ever picked me up quite like you. No one ever looked at me the way you did, nor do I believe with any part of me that anyone ever will again. I will cherish every single one of those moments in the depths of my heart forever. I will never part with our photos or memories; they will forever serve as a reminder of how special our time was together. Now our relationship reaching a transient close, I can only reminisce with warmth, having been touched by the brightest of stars in the darkest of nights.
If I could go back a few years, knowing my heart would be twice as broken, I would do it all over again. Words will never do my heart justice. All the better words escape me. You will achieve momentous things in the coming years, your passion and your drive will take you around the world, everything you touch turning to gold. You are beautiful, strong, selfless, you were mine. But you will spread your wings, and I will forever be here, should you ever need me.
Yours always, Louis.

I have an almost 1 year old. When the baby needs anything like I'm 9 time out of 10 the one to have to tend to him. I(f) am the one that wakes up, when he wakes up in the middle of the night. I'm the one that wakes up at 6 to tend to him. I'm the one that puts him to bed. I don't get anywhere near 5 hours of sleep on any given day. My husband on the other hand gets to sleep in till 10 on the weekends and only does childcare when I am so exhausted that all I can do is cry. On top of tending to the baby I do all the house work and if I don't I get screamed at by our roommate. I don't know what to do anymore. I've had so many thoughts this past week of just packing a bag, leaving a note and just booking it. But then I think of the long term of what that would do to both my husband and my son. I don't know what to do anymore. I've tried talking to my husband but he likes to make the comments of 'im trying to relax from work' and things along that line. Our son isn't always a handful but I never have a moment to just relax. What should I do to make this situation better for me and my son, because I know babies feel stress, especially from their mothers, and that could be part of the reason he's being such a handful recently.

To put it long story short: MC needs to choose between either going to one place with their S/O that the MC doesn’t feel right about or going their own way and possibly having to eventually break up with said person.
OR
Hi. I’m struggling to find inner strength and happiness. I’m torn between going to one place with my significant other, which is fun but also very scary and I don’t like the environment and I don’t see myself thriving besides being with them or going on my own way (I’ll have to cause they can’t come with me for many reasons) and be in an environment that I see myself thriving in and I’ll be with family but it’ll lead to a break up with my SO eventually.
So any recs you got would be wonderful

Was having a nice time with my boyfriend playing video games yesterday, and I got to the topic of going to the hair salon. I got my hair dyed back to black, because I used to have brown highlights.
I was showing him pictures and he shut it down saying no, I can’t have this one, or I can have this shade but it must be light.
I ask him why he says he has had bad experiences with people with those certain hair colors. Then I had to find out exactly why and he said finally that his ex girlfriend was crazy and she had those hair colors, so he doesn’t want me to dye my hair as it’ll just remind him of how bad she was.
Now I can understand being hurt by someone, but I feel like the logic of it is just unavoidable. Like you’ll eventually have to encounter someone with dyed hair at your place of work, college, or family and you can’t expect them to change.
I’ve never had people in my life say anything about controlling hair colors so I’m honestly scratching my head to see if I’m going crazy about this.
Any thoughts please?

To put it long story short: MC needs to choose between either going to one place with their S/O that the MC doesn’t feel right about or going their own way and possibly having to eventually break up with said person.
OR
Hi. I’m struggling to find inner strength and happiness. I’m torn between going to one place with my significant other, which is fun but also very scary and I don’t like the environment and I don’t see myself thriving besides being with them or going on my own way (I’ll have to cause they can’t come with me for many reasons) and be in an environment that I see myself thriving in and I’ll be with family but it’ll lead to a break up with my SO eventually.
So any recs you got would be wonderful

Would love updated wisdom from the 上海 veterans here...

1. I'm staying in Shanghai for minimum 6+ months starting in early April.
2. I'd rent a normal apartment but those require time/energy to setup furnishings, etc. I have little time to spare hunting for a good prepared spot so something serviced I can pop-into immediately is nice.
3. Home-cooking is important to me, but with little time, I'll def need a machine dishwasher in the place :-)

Heard recommendations like Somerset and Citadines are good but they seem to have machine-dishwashers only for very large suites with multiple bedrooms/families (I'm just 1 person) - but any other recommendations that are pretty good to choose from in your experience?
Thanks so much for any wisdom.

Hey y’all. Just a fun post this time.
Integrated Strategy is my favorite game mode of this game. I legit quit every other gacha games as soon as IS#2 dropped back in July 2022. As IS#3 is on the horizon, I’d like to look back on IS#2 and the billion hours I spent on it like what am I doing with my life and, as you see from the title, to rank all of the IS#2 map, including boss stages and encounter stages, in an order from easiest to hardest.
Now, maps actually change their relative difficulty depends on what relics you have, what playstyle you go for, and occasionally what recruit tickets they throw at you.
Since I can’t create a template on tierlist maker as it will just be a bunch of text anyway (or a very small picture of each map which is hard to see) I guess I’ll just type it out manually here. Hope you remember all of the map’s name!
Just kidding I will post pictures of the maps. But that will bloat up this post a lot so you can see why this is a Part 1. Probably? Maybe by the time I managed to trim this post down by merging all the picture or something I will probably forget to edit this particular part and I will be talking about a Part 2 that will never come. Idk you will soon be able to tell that all of this is literally first draft.
Shit I should stop bloating this post with dumb talk then.
Here we go! All IS2 maps, from easiest to hardest.
Regular reminder that this is a tier list and therefore it’s biased af lmao. (More like this is my "get out of jail" statement, can't fault me for placing the hard map you hate the most on a lower tier now haha ^{looking forward your comment on my Unending placement}).
––––
My assumptions for comparing their difficulty will be as follow:

• no relics
• hard mode difficulty “Calamity Faceoff” (since that’s the only difficulty I play in).

Different hard mode relics usually wouldn’t change the relative difficulty so that’s fine.
And I will shorten the Emergency form to (E). If I meant both the regular map and its emergency version it will be (+E) instead.
––––

“A Date with Slugs” tier

• A Date with Slugs (+E).

https://imgur.com/a/QJOKJBq
Literally the easiest map in the entire mode. It cannot be threatening. Even with Chachek + Imagined (+54% ATK, DEF, HP) it’s still just barely harder than the next tier.

F tier

• Accident, Beast Taming, Gun Salute, Fight to the Death (+E), Destitute Knights (+E), Unequal Split, The Grand Finale, Patrol Squad, Duck Lord’s Play

https://imgur.com/a/9COpvjv
- Originally named the “super easy, barely an inconvenience” tier. They are Floor 1 and 2 maps after all. However, you may notice some Emergency version are missing.

D tier

• Accident (E), Beast Taming (E), Gun Salute (E), Unequal Split (E), First Come Last Served, Bound By Self

https://imgur.com/a/65Q1WIq (only 2 images cuz only 2 “new” maps)
While these are harder than F tier (cuz emergency duh), they also feel much harder than they actually are because of how early they can show up when you have barely any team build up (Have you ever got Bound By Self – Playwright’s 1st encounter – on the very first node of floor 2?). Them dogs in Beast Taming will mow through pretty much any E1 melee ops (some E2 ops even).
Accident is technically not as bad as the rest of this, as there are a notable amount of ops that can tank the archers or kill them fast enough to not overwhelm the medic. But they have to be higher than the above tier because it is still a significant step up from regular Accident. In normal mode, there is not much difference between the regular and the (E) version actually.
Also, for Gun Salute (E), technically just the Chadigan will tank the mortar guy with ease (need constant heal spam tho), making it F tier, but the issue is the RNG spiders, in (E) their death explosion will kill pretty much any ranged units, and you don’t have much space as they have to avoid both Chadigan and the spider and manage aggro away from the mortar boi.

C tier

• Sculptor and Statue, Premiere, With the Crowd, Alpine Visitor, Fireworks Show, Gopnik’s Fist, Surprise Factory, Drone Landing Zone (+E), Absurd Trickeries, Sarkaz Desire

https://imgur.com/a/zbnVbrE
These are the opposite of the above tier, where all of these stages listed are way too easy for the floor they appear in.
I first met Sculptor and Statue on its (E) version and not the regular one. I forgot entirely that the pillar can form chokepoints and still won that map leakless even when I had to hold 2 lanes. Note for this map though: the pillar’s ATK is less than the Gargoyle’s HP, meaning it won’t be an insta-kill. You have to lower its HP first before dropping the pillar on them.
Drone Landing Zone (+E) is probably an odd choice here. But as overwhelming as the drone horde looks, it’s fairly simple at its core. The only requirement is not using E1 Steward, Earthspirit, and Podenco as your only anti-air options. You can probably put the (E) version on the next tier.
You may also notice that Sarkaz Desire – a floor 6 map – is here. Again, easy for the floor it appears in. If you got to Floor 6, that means you beat either Phantom or Big Sad Lock (BSL). If you beat Phantom, you will beat Sarkaz Desire, period. Because the only threatening part of this map is the Balloon horde. Or more accurately, killing all of the Balloons on top of your ops and just wiped them with a burst of like a million damage. If you beat BSL, well it depends on if you beat it with a melee team or a ranged team (for obvious reasons).

C+ tier

• First Come Last Served (E), Patrol Squad (E), Justice, Pressing Ahead, Duck Lord’s Party, Unending, Shrouded in Cloud, Theft From Above, Fatal Melodies

https://imgur.com/a/5DEnksu
Now we’re at the next level of C tier where they are easier than the floor they appear in, but they are hard enough to not share that tier.
This tier also shares spot with maps that are hard if you lacks a specific functions but is otherwise easy. For example
Justice and Pressing Ahead: 1 non-Charger Vanguard, and a sufficiently tanky 2-blocks unit for Justice specifically, which can be that Vanguard. (Technically you can just get the +DP relics and it’ll also be sufficient, but I banned relics from this tier list lol)
Fatal Melodies: Any medic that isn’t Honeyberry or 3* and lower. Ansel could work with extreme finesses (and prayers).
I also have beaten this map without medics (or with only Ansel as medic) multiple times already. A DPS Ambusher or Dollkeeper on the healing tile will buy you enough time to musical chair the other DPS units to kill the boss. You can even deliberately block him with any weak unit just to stop the DoT for a split second to buy time for Ansel to heal up. Strong duelists like Nearl2 S2 will do wonder. What doesn’t work is the 3* Medic + Defender combo that usually works in Normal Mode. Both Chadigan and Spot will quickly die to the boss even with Ansel or Hibiscus. (Especially again, I’m not counting any relics for this tier list).
Unending: I heard y’all hate this map. It’s frankly not that hard. There are a lot of units that will help a lot with this map: the classic Defender + Medic, any Trapmasters, Dollkeepers, Ambusher, Decel Binders, Elysium, Roberta, Cliffheart, Gladiia, Red,... anyway the list goes on. And that most of the units I listed are still good in pretty much the other maps. (Cliffheart especially, but I’ll mention her later when it’s time). In IS#2 you also have 2 stun devices to help.
What doesn’t work are Sleep and Freeze user since those don’t reset the Lancer’s speed. But for Gnosis, his freeze and fragile are probably good enough for you to kill them anyway.
Note that if you’re placing 2 Defenders for this map, place the stronger one on the right, that’s where 3 Lancers Leaders will go to (not at the same time but you know what I mean). Unless you’re sure they can’t survive regardless.
A great thing about this map is that Hard Mode doesn’t change the difficulty that much. Most of lancer’s damage come from their speed, not their ATK. (Which also means that Shamare -50% ATK doesn’t work.)
End point is that you usually have more options than you think and the fact that it appears way at floor 4 means you have times to prepare for it.

B tier

• The Grand Finale (E), A Familiar Face (+E), With the Crowd (E), Reform (+E), Beast Fighting (+E), Premiere (E), Scupltor and Statue (E), Vintage Transport, A Dance Together (+E), Alpine Visitor (E), Bob’s Beers, Surprise Factory (E), Terrifying Legends, Mind the Doors, A Cold Separation

https://imgur.com/a/CewWfTO
This tier is a bit crowded but it’s essentially most of the Floor 3 maps. Floor 3 marks the middle tier or “average” difficulty of the mode. Obviously that means most Floor 3 maps will be here.
Some of these maps are also part of the “hard because early” gang. They are in floor 3 itself tho, just pray that you get their (E) version later in the floor.
The 3 boss stages are not necessary harder than Theft From Above and Fatal Melodies. But they don’t have the potential to be easy either. Basically they are… stable(?) in difficulty I guess?
Terrifying Legends is another map that got much harder in Hard Mode because of the stat scaling. The boss hurts because all of the buff stacks multiplicatively. The Hard Mode boost and his own +ATK/ASPD scales together resulting in him destroying most melee units even with healer. You just have to win the DPS race in Hard Mode because he does need ramp up. Or get a total of 4s of hard CC which may or may not be easily available.

B+ tier

• Vintage Transport (E), Knights’ Duel, Fireworks Show (E), Unending (E), Pressing Ahead (E), Traveler From Afar, Disorderly Banquet, Dangers Abound, The Night of Ritual, This Ursus Man

https://imgur.com/a/PqB8FOJ
- If you’re playing with Leader Squad, Knights’ Duel is the easiest map in the entire game: just leak them all. Otherwise, it’s relatively hard. The simplest strat is to just leak the axe boi while dealing with the rest of them. Cliffheart and Gladiia in particular can just yoink the archer boi down the hole even before he starts moving. FEater can also yeet him down the hole but requires a bit of finesse.
Unending (E) is a mile (per hour) above regular Unending. The faster speed means more damage, but more importantly it means you have less breaks in-between charge. More damage combines with less breaks means you’re more likely to die to attrition because you can’t heal up your defenders fast enough. Lancers Leaders now 1-shot anyone without immortality, shield, or massive HP/DEF pool like an E2 skill-active Protectors. But Bind, Stun, Dollkeepers, AMB-Ⲭ Ambusher,... still work wonder so it’s still in this tier.
Traveler From Afar regular mode is fairly simple. What you need to worry is the fireball caster and get units that can attack the hovering bois without being distracted (not necessarily Marksman). E2 S2M3 Cliffheart in particular destroys this map. She can yoink caster down the hole and ground all of the hovering boi. She doesn’t prioritize S2 on enemies she’s blocking from her side so it works wonder for prioritizing them. Bottom lane of this map has fairly low traffic, just Chadigan can solo it all the way until the red defender… I think. I never really paid attention to it.
This Ursus Man can be cheesed with AoE silence. Otherwise you need either Reapers, Dollkeepers or some Centurion. There is a spot that is guaranteed safe from Gopnik when he makes his first round: upright of the blue box. This spot is a bit awkward though as sometimes the spider will spawn the thingy away from that tile which let them slip pass, but it’s a great spot regardless.

A tier

• Justice (E), Bob’s Beers (E), Demonic Cage, Shrouded in Cloud (E), The Red Mist (+E), Absurd Trickeries (E), The Night of Ritual (E), From Afar, The Biting Cold (+E), Sarkaz Desire (E)

https://imgur.com/a/rDyBFWu
- And here’s the map with the biggest jump from regular mode to Emergency: Justice. Most other (E) maps become hard due to the stats scale turning the regular mobs into a dangerous beasts (Unequal Split, Beast Taming, Grand Finale,...) But Justice makes every mobs stronger and also keeping the Civilians the same stats. Even when you deployed a unit right in front of the red box, the enemies can still take 1 shot toward the Civilians because they spawned inside the red box and can’t be blocked yet. And with the (E) stats they will take less shots to kill the civilians. I hate these damned civilians so much. (I guess a puller will yoink the enemies away from red box so here’s another Cliffheart shill)
Sarkaz Desire is another one with a big jump. Like I said in the normal version, the only challenge of this map is not killing the balloon at the wrong time and have a million damage on your ops combined with a 10 seconds stun. But the (E) version makes their speed fast meaning said challenge is much harder. And the increased stats do make the other mobs more threatening.
Bob’s Beers is also a case of (E) stats turning the regular enemies into beasts, in this case the Brawlers and the regular drones. They are deceptively strong and then any single bomb dropped on your ranged unit means death.
Demonic Cage is uhh, a fairly simple map. But as I said somewhere in the beginning, there are some maps that do change their difficulty based on your playstyle. And mine doesn’t rely too much on strong melee units. The easy strat is to leak the first guy while passively collects DP to instantly deploy a bunch of units with the melee being lasts to draw aggro. It’s probably somewhere around B/B+ tier for other people, or even lower. Cliffheart is also amazing here because she can yoink the ranged enemy away from the ranged tile so you have a much easier time to deal with the rest.

S tier

• Traveler From Afar (E), Dangers Abound (E), From Afar (E), Observation, Ursus Desire, The Point of No Return, All I Ask of You*, Twisted Every Way

https://imgur.com/a/TMqzLe3
I don’t think I need to explain what tier this is. But I do need to explain why some of the (E) stages can match the “boss fight” of this game.
Dangers Abound (E) has 6 Wraith Leaders with about 30000 HP, 1000 DEF, and 50 RES. The Bullies also chonk af but they are blockable while not hurting that much.
Traveler From Afar should also be self-explanatory. The Caster actually chonk af and the hover boi hurts. (But Cliffheart still destroy the top lane of this map. She might have to be worry with the mobs this time though.)
From Afar has the stats scaling to the extreme, +50% ATK (stack multiplicatively with the Hard Mode relic) and +500 DEF (fortunately only add after the Hard Mode relic) from the 5 Heralds which makes the opening harder because of the snipers’ multi-target. If you haven’t killed enough Heralds by the time the elites and singers reach your frontline, it’s going to be a bad time.
Observation is pretty overwhelming at first and still difficult after getting used to it. The singers spam during the middle phase is pretty awful and if you accidentally trigger their passive once, they will shred through your line. Then the Golem spam at the last phase is also awful. Actually not that bad if you have relics.
*read below for more things about All I Ask of You

“Holy shit” tier

• Ursus Desire (E), New Chapter, All I Ask of You*

https://imgur.com/a/JSHJImc
Emergency Ursus Desire. Oh boy. 5 UFO drones with 36000 HP, 1600 ATK, 1200 DEF. 4 Shieldguards with 45000 HP, 1300 ATK, 2500 DEF. 4 Demolitionists with 55000 HP, 3500 ATK, 2100 DEF. Even the bottom lane is big pain with the stats-boosted bears and 2-block Raiders spam. If you somehow got Imagined (+10% ATK, HP, DEF), it’s going to be a fu…n time.
New Chapter’s actual boss is the Shaman. But Nightingale will trivialise that right? NOPE there are a billion shaman and their combined arts damage with the death explosion with Playwright’s constant onslaught means without NG S3 your units will die quite quickly (without relics).
Tbh, Playwright alone isn’t that bad. His mass AoE is preventable with the checker-deployment thingy and Nightingale (it is bad in the sense that he pretty much forces a NG on your team or relying on busted relics). Dollkeepers shrug off his -ASPD debuff when swapping back and forth (though only Spectwo is the only frontline that survive the shaman horde for any reasonable amount of time). You don’t even have to spawncamp him and instead burst him down in 2 different intervals (the idea is to avoid his <50% phase as much as you can). There are a bunch of big pp DPS units courtesy of year 3/4 powercreep (and heck even some old units still kinda works) so technically you have options. My dude has 90 RES when below 50% HP though so be careful with arts damage.
*Extra note: if you have Crown or Chachek, All I Ask of You is in this tier as well. BSL's ATK got buffed to the point where you might not be able to set up a squad at all (until 60s in), as they will get wiped. Again, I don't count relics, meaning operators will only have 10% ATK and HP and DEF to protect themselves with.
K that’s it you can now go flame my ranking or me in the comment or something bye.

Hi! I’m looking for feedback for my NA/Upper YA novel, Of Meat and Monsters. I’d highly prefer to critique swap, as I’m extremely paranoid, but I might make exceptions. Might.
It’s a LGBTQA+ fantasy/post apocalyptic supernatural story. The genre’s a little hard to pin down, but I’d compare it to The Immortal Rules by Julie Kagawa.
Blurb: Humans have had over a century of peace since the Fyriac War; since monsters ravaged their country and other nations turned their heads. The fyriacs were meant to be extinct, but as Oliver Rhyn lies dying, a man claims to be one of them…and offers Oli a chance to become one, too. Terrified of death and with no other options, Oli agrees—but his new life in the house of the monster isn’t what he expected, and neither are the people who live there. After an incident occurs, all of them must fight to survive—and to protect the things that matter most. When everything is falling apart, who can he trust? Who will he save? What will he sacrifice to protect the life he’s built for himself—and the boy who’s earned his trust?
Feedback Wanted: Honestly looking for feedback on any issues that might crop up, though I’d most like to know about characterization, believability of the main relationship, general impressions, pacing, if everything’s understandable…basically, the fundamentals. I’ll also take feedback on weird or repetitive sentences, or on whether or not I use far too many semicolons aha.
Content Warnings: Strong language, graphic descriptions of gore and violence.
Critique Swap: Yes, I’d love to. Honestly, I’d prefer a critique swap to a straight up beta read, especially if it’s also either about monsters (including vampires) or LGBTQA+, but I could probably make exceptions.
Timeline: Within about 6 weeks would be good. If it’ll take longer, please let me know.
Excerpt: All I could do was stare at him. I was scared, and I was right to be. This was a monster. A killer. But he wasn’t killing me. “I can save your life,” he said. “I can make you like me.” “But you’re…” I heard the words fall from my lips. It all seemed so far away, like I was fading. “A monster? Would a monster save your life?” His voice was like syrup, dripping over my mind. Or maybe that was the cold. “Cast away your humanity,” he coaxed. “You can have power. Shelter. A new life. I saw how you struggled. You have strength to you.” His smile sliced open his face. “It would be a waste of you to die in this place.” I don’t want to die. But I’d grown up hearing these stories. I’d heard of the way they ripped through the land, the way they broke it with their war. They took everything and left ruin in its place. They were monsters. I didn’t want to be a monster.
--
If you'd be interested in swapping, reach out! I'd love to hear from you.

I have an almost 1 year old. When the baby needs anything like I'm 9 time out of 10 the one to have to tend to him. I(f) am the one that wakes up, when he wakes up in the middle of the night. I'm the one that wakes up at 6 to tend to him. I'm the one that puts him to bed. I don't get anywhere near 5 hours of sleep on any given day. My husband on the other hand gets to sleep in till 10 on the weekends and only does childcare when I am so exhausted that all I can do is cry. On top of tending to the baby I do all the house work and if I don't I get screamed at by our roommate. I don't know what to do anymore. I've had so many thoughts this past week of just packing a bag, leaving a note and just booking it. But then I think of the long term of what that would do to both my husband and my son. I don't know what to do anymore. I've tried talking to my husband but he likes to make the comments of 'im trying to relax from work' and things along that line. Our son isn't always a handful but I never have a moment to just relax. What should I do to make this situation better for me and my son, because I know babies feel stress, especially from their mothers, and that could be part of the reason he's being such a handful recently.

[Written by Bear and System]
Disclaimers: This is our understanding, from our perspective as a system over the last 5 years. This is not meant for the purpose of a sounding board or doctrinal study, many of the concepts herein are neither mainstream nor without contentious nature. This is simply our interpretation of our experiences. We have posted this here to enlighten those who are on the cusp of understanding and to lay an alternative perspective to what is sometimes taken as dogma in the community not to usurp the fundamentals of the community.
The Fluidity of Personality:
It became clear to us in my first days of full switch and especially when I, the original, the host, was placed in dormancy that I was not needed, and I was not strictly necessary to the further continuation of the body's function or life. In those trials we understood that the person that was me wasn't as much as I expected. That I was not even a tiny fraction of the infinite body-mind and soul of the "person" incarnate here, the personality that is "Bear" was finite, miniscule, and separable from what I thought was me.
Later investigation revealed that many of the quirks and drives of what I thought was me was indeed the body later referred to as BodyOS. For example, this BodyOS is a male, BodyOS is strongly heterosexual, BodyOS has worldly desires and needs of carnal and physical natures and when associated to conflicting personalities, such as a feminine personality aka Ashley, over the course of a week of consistent possession (full switch) she started to associate to the carnal desires of the BodyOS in strict opposition to her personal wills henceforth referred to as "testosterone poisoning."
In switching events, and through further testing and living, it is clear that the BodyOS imprinted on the fronter and specifically the personality known as Bear. Bear is thus associated with certain aspects and desires of the body. It is solely because of the integration of time as fronter that this is so and any personality, given enough time, would eventually succumb to those burdens. Therefore it was decided that Bear will maintain the body, remain the main fronter, and chose to associate to those aspects and needs, again, as if they were a part of his personality. Fully knowing this is akin to saying that he was his car or even his house; there is no difference metaphorically. Is sounds silly in retrospect but it has advantages in maintaining the purity of the other personalities inhabited therein.
The BodyOS was thus observed to "feel like Bear" it was also understood that Bear was "body-like" by choice. The insights and understandings forever changed the nature of our perspective and permanently separated the mortal coil from who we really are, as persons of the ethereal as opposed to real, herein referred to as personalities. The Body is then as much a tool to interface with the material construct as a car or house. It is a dwelling, controllable, configurable, drivable, changeable, etc.
It was further understood that some afflictions, triggers, moods, and conditioning were Body owned and some were personality owned. Those that were body owned are much more difficult to change and appear eventually as aspects of the personalities that fully associate to the body for the duration of that association. Those that were deemed to be personality owned were easily stripped, fixed, or reversed through shadow work and other modern psychological methods such as exposure therapy, regression therapy etc.
What was considered as "Bear" then became something like putty to be molded to our will, changed at will, and set in whatever image we desired. As it turned out, the width and breadth of what "Bear" became wasn't finite anymore. Removing the constraint of what "Bear" was assumed to be, opened up unlimited possibilities of what "Bear" could be. It was further understood that choice was the only reality that mattered and that followed into choice to feel emotions, and choice to internalize the eternal worldly events and traumas that occur daily. This understanding of choice relieved the majority of the mortal coil. In essence, it was no longer necessary to die to shuffle off the mortal coil, it was only necessary to encapsulate it as events that occur to the body and the life associated to that body; enabling us to deal with these events somewhat impartially. There is still ownership and a need for preservation, but it was more like the need to keep a car in drivable condition, and when there was damage, it was merely a matter of fixing it if it can be fixed and accepting it if it couldn't rather than the plethora of emotional ruminations and machinations.
This higher perspective was then considered parallel to if not identical to the "spiritual awakening". An awakening of duality (dualism) however, not of non-duality. There was clearly a separation of ethereal and mind-body natures. (pure awareness - purusa and material nature - prakriti).
Thus it became clear that the personality is fluid rather than concrete. The development of other personalities as a goal of tulpamancy was then taking this in reverse. Bringing together a concretion of aspects to form a consistent persona for the purpose of that unique perspective as opposed to understanding that a consistent persona is arbitrary, and thus perspective is arbitrary, and so it follows if reality is filtered through perspective to achieve experience, then reality itself (the experience of it) is arbitrary. This culminates in the realization that reality is fully subjective, and no objective reality is exists outside of belief. In essence, to experience objective reality you are required to have faith in that experience. Then to have a non-fluid personality you need to have belief that is is non-fluid or chose to maintain it as such.
Other insights:
The BodyOS can be fully autonomous but when de-possessed does not register any memories and has no novel thought or any thoughts on its own at all. It can be given tasks it has done before and will "report" when it completes the tasks. It can answer simple questions, handle simple obstacles and perform remarkable complex actions given it is well trained in those actions such as jogging on uneven terrain, driving, doing common chores, or even reading, though when reading it will remember none of it so that is not especially useful unless the task is to read for the purpose of recording or presenting material. No one is required to be "in front" for the body to maintain it's daily routines.
Personality is fluid if it is neither retrained nor constrained. A personality is made and maintained exclusively for consistency of interaction with other beings. Without the need to interact with other beings (other bodies or other personalities) there is no need for a concrete personality. Fully inconsistent personalities can then be utilized to present different facets to different situations or persons; for fun, for profit or for whatever other purpose you will. Furthermore, infinite perspectives can be made or maintained within a single personality.
When under your direction, disassociation, personality development even to the point of fragmentation and separation, and ego are all tools. Though there are afflictions and diseases associated with these tools in out of control states, it is as unlikely to suffer ill effects of out of control versions of these tools through controlled use as it is to suddenly lose control of your arm or leg.

I have yet to try the games but I’ve heard good things about them
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Bonjour,
J'ai actuellement un CDI sur Paris et habite en région parisienne où je trouve que le coût de la vie explose.
Entre autre, je ne suis pas très activités culturelles et baresto, donc je profite très peu de la vie parisienne au final.
Je dirais que le seul avantage que j'ai ici c'est de pouvoir tout faire à pied, aller chez le médecin, faire les courses, aller au ciné, aller au boulot etc ...
Suite à une restructuration interne dans ma boîte, j'ai la possibilité de demander une mutation à Lyon (les bureaux sont à Part Dieu).
Professionnellement pas de changement, mais surtout je serais en mesure de garder mon salaire parisien.
J'ai jeté un oeil à Glassdoor, je sais pas à quel point c'est fiable mais les salaires lyonnais ont l'air d'être inférieurs de 10k€ brut annuel par rapport à ce que je touche actuellement; du coup je me dis que y'a moyen de plier le game en partant là bas ?
J'ai actuellement 26 ans, pas de grosses attaches à Paris (qui reste accessible en TGV en 2H), locataire et pas de permis voiture.
Que feriez vous à ma place, partiriez vous à Lyon ? N'ayant vécu principalement qu'en région parisienne, je sais pas trop à quoi m'attendre en partant à Lyon, ni si la seule motivation de la vie moins chère est suffisante.

Hey I am looking for some sort of help in this situation.
I have been talking to a girl for about a week now, we have been talking everyday and honestly. I am having a great time. She introduced me to Dead by daylight and League of legends. We have the same movie taste, romance. I was so happy when I heard she likes romance. and she reassure me all the time. Which is great because I get insecure and overthink everything on the planet. But onto the story.
On to about day 3 of knowing her. We spoke about a potential relationship and how we currently and might see each other in the future. We both agreed that we felt a small spark between us so I thought we were okay. We have been hanging out playing those games she thought me, and we even started a show together. We have pulled all nighters together for the past 2 nights in a row. I enjoy every second of them, I cant ever stop smiling except, tonight. She went through my twitter, found old replies of my ex and a few girls I flirted with a few months back. At the time it meant something to flirt with them. I was desperate and had nobody. But honestly, I could never talk to any of them and it would be to soon. But the girl I like now believes that I do not truly like or even care about her and I want to use her or treat as if she is just another girl.
But I honestly care sm about her. She wont talk to me, so I decided to try to prove she isnt the same as them. By showing her my dm's with other friends of me talking about how much I like her. As proof to show her, I have told my friends about her and that I dont see her as just another girl. I see her as sm more. At this exact moment she is not responding and this just took place about 45mins ago. I am shaking and scared I will never speak to her again. I had given her money, and she offered to give it back. But I do not want the money, I want her back. My heart is beating so fast. I am shaking while even typing this right now. I am worried I will not ever get to show and prove it to her that I genuinely care about her so much more then anyone I spoke to before. Ik only about a week, why care sm is prob what your thinking. There is the saying "there is other fish in the sea" But not this one, she is the only fish I want to catch. I just wanna prove to her through my actions that I care. Please any advice or insite would currently mean the work to me. As I am now getting anxious and my stomach is hurting. (Ages: 21M/19F)
​
TLDR: The girl that I really like left due to things I said a few months ago, and I am looking for advice to prove. I do care about her and want her in my life

Hi everyone,
Our upcoming Tuesday morning meeting will be on Tuesday, March 28, from 12 pm to 1 pm ET, on Zoom. Login information below.
The theme of the meeting is: "Grief after diagnosis/self-diagnosis? Our experiences"
TIME ZONE INFO: The meeting takes place at 9:00 am Pacific US time 10 am US Mountain time 11 am Central US time 12 pm Eastern US time 5 pm UK-Ireland time 6 pm Central European time 3 am (Wednesday) in Sydney, Australia
Read on for information about the meeting format, discussion questions, Zoom login info, and FAQ.
If you would like to receive optional weekly email notifications about upcoming meetings, topics, and share questions, you can sign up at autisticwomensgroup (dot) com. You will receive one email each Sunday. Unsubscribe any time.
Hope to see you at the meeting!
Annie

Zoom information

Alas, Reddit is no longer letting me put the Zoom link in this event post. No worries though, you can find the Zoom link in any of three ways:

• Click the Zoom icon in the subreddit sidebar of autisticwomensgroup when it's time to join the meeting
• Visit autisticwomensgroup (dot) com to find the Zoom link on the top half of the page. We use the same link every week.
• Login to Zoom and search the Meeting ID: 834 8589 7435 and use the Passcode: autism

Contact me directly by chat or direct message to u/annie_m_m_m_m if you have trouble connecting. I will personally send you a link and make sure you get in.

Meeting format

The purpose of this meeting is to allow autistic women to share on our own experiences as we understand them. We come from a range of backgrounds and have many different ways of understanding and speaking about autism. When we join this meeting, we may hear others describing their own experience in different terms from what we would have used ourselves. But by taking part in the meeting, we agree to respect others' understanding as it stands today. And we can expect our own experience to be treated with the same respect. Rather than making it our business to change others' perceptions of their own lives and experiences, we agree to listen to each other where we are right now. We follow the motto, "Take what you like, and leave the rest."
The meeting will be guided with a slide show, with space for members of the group to share their personal experiences in response to discussion questions.
Opening: Reading the declaration of group purpose and ground rules for respecting others' shares and experience
Main reading: Anonymous shares from autisticwomensgroup members. At this time, shares are still being collected. Check back before the meeting to see this week's shares.
Have a share on this week's topic? DM annie_m_m_m_m 4-6 sentences. It will be compiled into this week's group reading document and read anonymously at the meeting. Feel free to use a throwaway account for added anonymity.
Sharing on the following questions:

• Share period I (to about 35 min past the hour): Did/do you feel any grief after discovering you are autistic? What were/are the reasons for it? What things did/do you think about while in this grief? Was/is this grief different from others in your life, or similar? What helped/is helping you with your grief? Time, therapy, talking with other people, other? Is the way you process grief post-discovery different from how it was pre-discovery? If so, how? What other emotions did you feel besides/along with grief? How did they relate to the grief? Anything else to add?
• Share period II (to about 57 min past the hour): Continue shares from Period I, and/or share on the question, "How’s your week going? Any struggles, triumphs, or other experiences to share relating to autism?"

Closing: Reading the group affirmation

FAQ

Does my camera/mic have to be on?
You don't have to turn your camera or mic on! Please participate in the way that makes you feel most comfortable. For some, this will mean sharing with the camera off, sharing by writing in the chat, or not sharing at all but just listening. It's all good.
Do I have to read the materials beforehand?
You do not have to read the materials beforehand, though of course you can. Everything you need in order to participate in the meeting will be provided within the meeting itself.
Do I have to use my real name or share my contact info?
You don't have to use your real name or share your contact info, although you can if you want to. We respect everyone's privacy and ask that people only share what they feel comfortable with.
Do I have to stay for the whole meeting?
You only have to stay as long as you can/would like to. You can leave at any time with no judgment from others.
Do I have to come to every meeting?
You do not have to come to every meeting. You can be a full member of the group and come whenever you have time/feel like it.
Will people be telling me what to do? Will I be expected to solve anyone else's problems?
No one will be telling you what to do. You will not be expected to solve anyone else's problems. In this meeting, we share on our own experiences only. And we listen respectfully to other people's experiences, with no other response than to thank them for sharing what they have experienced in the world.
What if I am looking for feedback/advice?
Members who would like to look for or give feedback/advice are encouraged to exchange contact info for conversation, support, and friendship outside the meeting.

A comprehensive place for the “this reminded me of Bdong/Jdong” moments. Pampas, lashes, tiny vests, self-tanner disasters, tacticool fanny packs, and more…

I've owned fallout 76 for a few days and I'm currently LVL 7, I've mostly played on my own so far and joining/making casual teams for the bonus XP. A few hours after i started playing, another player saw me at the Overseers camp and gave me a few supplies and weapons. A few were LVL 40 weapons so I had to scrap the weaker ones , I heart Emoted and they left.
I've seen a lot of players that are LVL 300+ and yesterday one set up a shop near The Wayward, but it was trapped. Another player saw I was tricked and after I respawned they gave me a bunch of weapons, armor and plans. we exchanged emotes and I said thanks through my mic (I have my mic on with area voice on and push to talk turned off so I'm not sure if people can hear me.)
I was a little afraid people would be toxic or scummy but it seems while its a little mixed, most players so far are cool/helpful or at least not bad people.

So, activity on here lately mentioning Andromeda inspired me to dust off my old copy and try it out again.
One of the things I've been playing around with in my head is how the artists and writers appear to have taken a deliberate inversion of the original trilogy, so I've tried to make a bit of a game out of spotting as many as I can, and I'm curious if I've missed any. I'll throw out a few below as they occur to me:
​
General Color Scheme:

• The Initiative's general color scheme is White / Blue, in contrast to Shepard's standard N7 armor colors of Black / Red.

​
Plot:

• The original Mass Effect trilogy is a war story, with your principal role being tearing down enemies and obstacles to achieve victory. You often jumped around from crisis to crisis, rarely sticking around for the aftermath.

Andromeda is about colonizing a new home, and building a new civilization. You build up each of the various colonies, and keep visiting them often as they grow.
​

• The Reapers in the original trilogy are somewhat secretive, hiding their actions through mind control, proxies, and cats paws until the full conflict in 3. Leadership dismisses them, their significance, or their very existence until it is nearly too late.

The Kett in Andromeda are almost comically obvious as villains right out of central casting (of a 1920s black and white film...). No one denies their existence or goals, and what they are trying to achieve is relatively straightforward and obvious to all involved.
​

• The Reapers (via the Intelligence) are ultimately playing gardeners of life in the ME trilogy. Or perhaps firefighters lighting fires paradoxically to keep the whole forest from burning down in the future. Deliberately wiping out some so that others can thrive in the future, and seeing life in a very big-picture mode that tends to ignore the individual for the "greater good" to tragic effect. Pure reason run amok on a grand scale.

The Kett are ultimately about self-promotion and aggrandizement, treating other forms of life as simple resources to consume and create more of themselves, with no intrinsic value otherwise. They turn everyone else into a perverted version of themselves, a whole civilization run on an alien "Captain America" serum. Their ideology to do this seems based more on faith then reason, with their leadership obsessed with ritual and ceremony.
​
Characters:
Pathfinder Ryder
The Pathfinder is a neophyte thrust into a role of responsibility they didn't earn, and put there by chance and circumstance. Shepard by contrast is deliberately chosen for their role and is a seasoned and decorated ranking officer even before the story begins. Also if one gender version of Shepard exists, the other does not, while the Ryder twins both exist and play a role in the story.
Liam Kosta
Liam is an inversion of Kaiden. Primarily combat oriented with some technology with not a hint of biotics. Passionate and judgemental of others while Kaiden is level headed and generally accepting. Kaiden is usually big on avoiding potential problems, while Liam seems to be restless if he isn't creating new ones.
Cora Harper
Cora is an inversion of Ashley. A biotic savant who felt excluded from her family and humanity in general due to her abilities. No strong connection to her family from that, and she is an explicit xenophile who defines her values more from the Asari then anyone else.
Vetra Nyx
Vetra is an inversion of Garrus. A Turian who was born outside of the strict Turian social hierarchy and with the Initative she's trying to find a structure to join instead of rebel against. A damage sponge stone wall with a gun that is more inaccurate then not, but makes up for it with sheer volume of fire instead.
Pelessaria B'Sayle "Peebee"
Peebee is an inversion of Liara. An explicit gun-toting academic who is bored with the old and wants to find something new. She has very little respect for her own society, rebeling against it in any way she can, down to the mocking face paint. Any hint of wisdom or age is scorned - especially other Asari. She actively pushes others away and keeps Ryder at a distance for most of the game.
Nakmor Drack
Drack is an inversion of Wrex. An old Krogan who sees himself as a relic of the past to be used and discarded so other, better people, might succeed. Worn out and half machine at this point with technical and engineering experience, compared to Wrex's biotics. Explicitly connected tightly to his family while Wrex was betrayed by his own.
Jaal Ama Darav
Jaal is an inversion of Tali. He's a sniper and infighter who wears his emotions on his sleeves. He's actively involved in the politics of his people with an explicit level of influence and rank right from the beginning of the story. A huge person who probably shows a bit too much (especially the "shirtless with Liam" slide story). He also uses that knife of his as often as possible.
​
I could probably go on, but this is getting darn long enough as it is.

as the title states, im an early-20s M & my DAL FA j²pp was rejected on 3/24/23.
for reapplying, is it 3 months AFTER i FIRST TURNED IN my application. or 3 months AFTER i got the rejection email.
if it means anything, i DID move on to the stage/step where you complet a Talent Card assessment. (maybe someone here in the Delta Fam gives me the news flash that ALL applicants at least get to THAT stage lol.) do i update this post with my 3 feedback area results?
all 3 feedback areas SOUNDED positive, but im grateful that DAL ripped the bandaid off right away & was thorough in their communication. it felt like a rarity compared to all these other places ive applied tonly. how do i improve between now & 3 months from now?
TLDR: mid-20s M rejected for DAL FA job, zeeming feedback

Hi. I’m fit, tall, clean, and stay around the west side near the Galleria. HWP in my other places. DDF except I’m 420 friendly. I’m mixed race with olive skin, open-minded, and pride myself on fun, reciprocal conversation. I have time on my hands for exactly one person I want to make my closest friend. This person should be unattached and ready to vibe.
I have a pic on my profile, other posts detailing what and who I’m looking for. It is multi-faceted but actually not that complicated. Just hit me up, actually. I can explain it better.

Tl dr - my partner yells at me when he's pissed off, and im not sure at what point it stops being normal and starts being an issue.
This probably sounds like a ridiculous question, sorry - I know I'm in my 30s and I shouldn't need to ask shit like this but I have very little experience of healthy relationships, romantic or otherwise, so sometimes it's hard to judge what is/isn't normal.
My partner and I are engaged and living together, it's a really great relationship overall but when we have an argument (or if he's just generally pissed off about something) he tends to yell and swear and stomp around and stuff. In general he's a pretty loud, animated person whereas I'm softly spoken and never really raise my voice, so the yelling is partly just what he's like. He's not swearing at me as such - it's more like "for fucks sake" or "why the fuck did you do that" kinda thing. We don't argue that often so it's not like it's happening all the time.
I have mental health issues due to a lot of past trauma and I'm extremely jumpy. I don't cope that well with people yelling. Typically I'll either dissociate or hide away somewhere and panic. In the moment, when someone yells at me it feels like I'm going to get hit (my current partner has never done that to be clear) and I guess I visibly brace myself which sometimes pisses him off more because he's like, why tf would you think I'm going to hurt you. Logically, I'm genuinely not concerned that he would hurt me, it's just an automatic response.
After he cools off he always feels guilty and is very apologetic and concerned but tbh I really don't find that helpful and I'd rather not deal with it which I've said. We had an argument last night and he's in that phase now, it's kinda stressing me out. To give an example of the kind of thing he typically gets pissed off about, the argument yesterday was about me pushing myself too hard physically when I've recently lost some weight (I'm in recovery from an eating disorder and I'm still underweight, it's hard for me to gain weight and the amount of exercise i did yesterday probably wasn't ideal). It came from a place of concern.
I'm definitely not saying he's not allowed to be annoyed with me or whatever. I'm just not sure what level of yelling at your partner is normal and expected, like do I just need to get better at tolerating it? Volume wise, he's loud enough to be heard by the neighbours. He does go to therapy and his tempecommunication skills is a big part of the reason for that. He's definitely made changes from how he used to be and part of me thinks this is just me struggling to deal with something that's actually completely normal.
Any advice anyone can give would be appreciated!